I broke my own Cardinal Rule today by eating in my car.
What rules do you have about yours, /o/?
>that sub
Muhhh dick
Dont park under trees
No smoking
No shopping car parks
I eat in my car though because im not a retard
>>14730003
>eating in my car.
even though im an avid smoker i never ever smoke in my 250$ rustbox
>>14730003
No more driving around on acid
>>14730011
Best Philly Cheese Steak on the Left Coast.
>>14730033
No smoking
No food that could leave stains (grease, soda, etc)
No more hektik skids on commercial property (2 staples and a nail in tires)
Atleast a minute to warm up
No one else fucking drives my truck, get over it nate
>>14730056
Where to cop
>>14730435
Alkobar in Indio, CA.
>eating food that is that messy
>eating food that is that messy in your car
your poor steering wheel
Only masturbate with a condom on
Only drink Budweiser if drinking beer in car
Don't take selfies while going over 80 mph
>>14730511
>masturbate with a condom on
just why?
>>14730003
Regular maintenance.
If you make trash during the car ride, trash goes into a garbage when the car stops.
Car doesn't move until everyone is wearing a seatbelt.
No, you may not have the center armrest, I am the one doing the shifting here.
There is nothing wrong with eating in your car as long as you clean up after. Vacuum the crumbs. Clean the grease prints. Don't let dirty food wrappers pile up.
>>14730003
Jerk off until oil warms up
Throw your trash in the truck bed if youre the passenger; unless we've got a roadtrip trashbag going on
Dont ash in the vehicle
Know what songs not to speak during
>>14730515
stops you making a mess on your steering wheel
She usually doesn't let me cum in the exhaust pipe but I couldn't help myself today
>>14730515
Where we're going, we don't need whys
>no smoking
>no open cups when moving
>don't leave trash
>>14730003
No one but me is allowed to drive my car.
The only exception are:
Mechanic when doing a wheel alignment.
Best friend when helping me diagnose an issue
Anyone capable of driving stick on an unpsrung 4 puck clutch when I'm beyond fucked up, and cant leave my car overnight.
>>14730003
>insist the car gets me lots of girls despite only being around men, driving with men, to car meets full of men, talking about it with men, and inviting only men around to work on it
>no food
>no large drinks
Because mk4 cup holders can only hold 20 oz cups. Anything larger will flip over when turning
>Armrest is for me only
Why does the front passenger need to hog the armrest? You're comfortable enough not having to worry about the road
>no smoking/vaping
>dont touch the radio
I rather drive in silence or tune it to classic rock than to hear my friends play shit that i don't like
>>14730003
>It's a VW
It's ok the interior is shit anyway.
>>14730003
>no shitting on the seats
>no puking onto my face and punching my nose, creating a strawberry shortcake of puke and blood
>no gouging my eyes out with your hot broken meth pipe
>no Mercedes drivers allowed
Really, that last one guarantees the first three won't happen.
>>14730003
I have a shitbox 1997 Accord - I love the way it feels and how the steering isn't numb. Most normal non-sports cars to me have numb steering. Its not worth much, its not the greatest looking car, not the fastest, but it's mine and I can be quite autistic about it.
>I smoke, but no smoking in the car, ever, I will fucking cut you
>no eating chocolate, cookies, sandwiches, hot dogs, basically anything that can crumble or spill sauce on the seats
>don't lean on my car, ever
>you cannot drive it - only I drive my car
>dont park under trees
>dont park next to spills when it rains
>dont fuck with the air vents
>dont fuck with the windows
>dont open the fucking sun roof
>dont SLAM the fucking door
>no vaping
>no touching the radio/phone (bluetooth)
>no fat chicks
>cant get a ride if you have dirty pants with dirt and shit on them
>if you sit on the rear seat, dont use the pockets of the front seats
>don't ever fucking touch any of the mirrors
I think that covers most of it.
>>14731685
James May browses /o/
I had to impose a no driving off-road rule in my new (used) truck along with a no clutter or trash rule
These are both solely for my sake I have broke both rules since
is it really bad to smoke in the car if you detail bi-weekly?
Smoke smell can be gone in 30 seconds with febreeze
>>14731743
Pleb
I smoke in my jag all the time and never use febreeze. I ask if people can smell it and they never can. The secret is to never put the cigarette out in the car. Always flick it outside. Also helps to hold it outside when not dragging on it, but that's not necessary. Doesn't hurt to have good quality leather though
>>14731768
Is the headliner leather in the old Jags?
My headliner is fabric so I just spritz it with febreeze every other week and keep it moving.
>>14730012
>No shopping car parks
Just park far away from the entrance where all the lazy fuckers never park. Guaranteed 10 empty spaces in a row, low chance of door dings or bumper knocks
The Mustang I don't let anyone eat in. You can drink water in it.
No smoking either
Other than that treat the car with fucking respect.
My work van. Meh I eat in that fucker all the time
OP reminded me.
Put wetwipes in yo car, niggas.
I don't eat in it, but one day I will or someone else will.
>>14730311
>Atleast a minute to warm up
Doesn't idling cold do more damage than just driving off at a sensible pace and letting the car warm up naturally?
>>14730003
You can drive it, I don't care.
You can eat in it, why not? If you make a mess, your ass is cleaning it.
You can smoke, my kids ride in my wifes car anyway.
>>14731930
Leave your wife. I want to marry you
>>14730056
Huh. Didn't know they make Cheesesteaks out west. Looks like a cheesy pulled pork. Would try.
No food.
No drink.
No trash.
No dirty shoes.
Nothing too heavy.
No short distance drives.
No driving while inebriated.
No freshener 'cept black ice.
Never above the speed limit on freeways.
Not a friend? No rides.
I don't care about eating in the car unless it's some kind of messy food.
>>14730012
fucking trees and their pollen cum is all over my car
My car has no rules.
You don't have to wear a seat belt
You can eat in it
You can smoke in it
If I let you drive it you better not fuckin crash it tho.
>>14733860
Let me guess, you have 0 friends.
>>14730003
I refuse to even look at my phone while driving. It stays in my pocket, call or not, text or not.
I don't eat in my car, unless I plan to be in the car longer than an hour.
I don't smoke, period, and no one is allowed to smoke in my car.
>>14733860
Autism is a life-affecting disorder characterized by a profound withdrawal from contact with people; repetitive behaviour; and fear of change in the environment. The emotional disorder affects the brain's ability to receive and process information.
>>14733888
Good guess. But no.
Most of my friends are stoners, and none of them like cars. How do I find car fools?
>>14730056
>>14730435
>>14730438
Best cheeseteaks I've had in CA were Cheesesteak Grill in Oceanside. Also, I'm from PA and my first job was making cheesesteaks.
>>14733860
What shitbox do you drive?
>>14733946
Car people are not generally good people to have around your car.
Respectful people are, most car people are shit cunts.
If you're over 20 and don't already know who hasn't grown up yet, then you deserve what is coming.
>>14730511
>Drinking beer in car
>>14731857
No damage. Just wasting gas.
1min would be my minimum if >0C
I'm not too particular about anything. If you start breaking stuff or spilling odorous liquids/food in my car you will get fucked.
Seat belts required.
Don't put sharp/heavy stuff on the leather seats.
Ask my permission for smoking
Clean up your trash, if you left a lot of crumbs then you just bought my car a vacuum run
No one gets to touch the radio
Feet go on the floor
>>14734019
So you're saying I shouldn't look for gear heads, and focus instead on "good" people?
But don't you empathize with the agony felt when you talk cars at a friend and get a blank stare and a "uh-huh."
>>14731547
How can you possibly manage to follow such stringent rules?
Stop bitching about the non functioning belt buckles in the back ride in comfort you are in a 90s Lexus.
You can't turn off my radar detector. If I'm not speeding I ignore it. you can too
Don't ask me to turn down my sub
Don't ask me to un pair my phone from my head unit so you can pair yours
If you leave a roach in my car (or fail to throw it out) you're fucking banned from blazing in my car
>>14731930
Wow did you really cuck a woman and fool her into raising kids that aren't hers?
>>14732022
>Didn't know they make Cheesesteaks out west.
Were you born yesterday? They are not a regional food, this isn't 1978
>>14734098
so then fucking kill yourself
>No smoking
>No eating unless you're on my list
>Only water unless you're on my list
A lot of you have a lot of common courtesy rules, who the fuck are your friends that you have to worry about this shit?
>No feet on the dash
>Don't leave trash in my car
>Don't put sharp/heavy stuff on the seats
>Seat belts required
>Don't turn my radar detector off
>Don't slam the door
>Don't touch the mirrors
>Don't touch the radio
You people have terrible taste in friends if you have to make rules about dumb shit like this. No decent or remotely polite person will do any of that shit.
>>14736755
Well I should've clarified my people sometimes ask me to turn my detector off
>>14731685
Autism
>don't let anyone smoke in my car
>don't use my phone while driving
Exceptions are picking up the phone when listening to music on my headset and quickly reading through a conversation when my phone it in its holder and I'm stuck in traffic.
>take any thrash that's produced during the ride out immediately when arriving at the destination
I just want to keep the interior liveable. The outside is dented and scratched to hell by its previous owners anyways, so I don't really mind anyone slightly damaging my car in a parking lot or whatever.
>no smoking in the car
>if you chose to sit in the back seat, deal with it if it's not comfortable, this is the hell you chose
>vaping is okay, just crack a window open
>you must have my permission to do anything with the radio
>please make sure the suicide door is closed before trying to close the door
I usually keep a bag for trash, so I don't normally have trouble with people's trash
>No rev over 2,5k until motor oil is at 90°C
>it's MY car so I DECIDE what music is played
>eating is okay unless its something dry and crumby like bread. I vacuum my car every week so if it's on the floormat I don't care. But I don't feel like removing my seats every fucking time only because your nigga ass spills crumbs where my vac cleaner doesn't reach
>if you don't like the way I drive, get the fuck out
>if you want me to go faster, get the fuck out
>if you feel like I'm going too fast and you're not comfortable anymore, let me know. I will slow down.
>>14730003
>>14730003
No eating at all
No drinks that can't be closed (no cups or cans, bottles are fine)
No smoking
No vaping unless it's straight out the window
Park well away from everyone else if I can
>tfw I frequently eat in my car, but freak when other people do it
No complaining about driving too fast or driving best line
No holding the wheel while I roll a j bone and steer w my knee
No stuffing empty beer cans under the seat
Don't put things on the paint
No touching the radio you fucking pleb
>>14730598
You know that condoms have lube on them
I took a fat bitch on my bike once.
Fuck.
>no smoking, ever.
>trash goes in TRASH CANS you fuck, not my car
>my car, my music. You can listen to your music when you get your own fucking car
>no rides for smelly people. It bad enough my trunk flooring got moldy as fuck when the weather stripping started leaking, I don't need my car smelling like a locker room now that I finally got the mold smell out
>if i say batton the fucking hatches, you close your fucking window. No windows open on the highways, in pollen-heavy areas, in dust/dirt heavy areas, or shady parts of town.
>there is one name on my insurance: mine. Therefore, there is on one person allowed to drive my car: me
>>14730012
i park under trees to shade the interior and the paint from as much UV rays as posible
>>14730515
Have you ever masturbated with a condom? It feels pretty good with extra lube. Cheap sex toy basically.
>>14736755
>A lot of you have a lot of common courtesy rules, who the fuck are your friends that you have to worry about this shit?
>>No feet on the dash
Friends girlfriends are the only ones I've ever had to mention this to.
>>Don't leave trash in my car
Bad habits stick with people. Typically if we're taking my vehicle it's because I can seat 8. Trash gets left behind and I'll have to remind them when the trip is over.
>>Don't put sharp/heavy stuff on the seats
Never had to worry about this one.
>>Seat belts required
Don't require my backseat passengers to wear seatbelts. Once you're over 16 you can legally sit in the rear without a belt.
>>Don't turn my radar detector off
It doesn't turn off.
>>Don't slam the door
Females never learn.
>>Don't touch the mirrors
Who would even consider this?
>>Don't touch the radio
I share the radio. I just don't let them control the sub. Gangster rap is forbidden just because of the sub.
>You people have terrible taste in friends if you have to make rules about dumb shit like this. No decent or remotely polite person will do any of that shit.
I let a couple of my friends slide. Trash is about the only thing that gets forgotten. I empty whenever I'm at a gas station.
>>14737041
batton the hatches? holy fuck man are you a middle aged woman? I honestly couldn't even fucking imagine riding with someone and I heard "BATTON THE HATCHES" please tell me your not an autistic savant.
Just don't leave garbage in my car, I swear to fucking god.
A week later I'll notice a stale McDonald's smell and find a bunch of junior chicken rappers stuffed into the cupholder on the door, who the fuck keeps doing this?
>>14730003
I don't need any for other people. People are courteous and polite, because I don't associate with people who aren't.
Otherwise:
> LET ME DRIVE YOUR CAR SENPAI
Insure it first, and if you cause any damage, YOU are liable for the excess.
> DONT YOU TRUST ME SENPAI
No.
> I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS
I don't see you outside of work, I don't have you on facebook. So, no, we're not.
> No sausage rolls
I need to stick to this, because they drop pasty flakes EVERY FUCKING WHERE.
> Using the cupholder? Use the teatowel to keep the can/cup in place.
Literally the first time I took my car anywhere, a big can of energy drink tipped over and spilled all over the seat. Never. The fuck. Again.
> No rubbish left inside
It will build up if I let it. I'll SOMETIMES let stuff stay overnight and bin it on my way into work in the morning.
> Air it out periodically
Takeaway runs happen in it, and occasional nibbling on bits of tasty. The smell lingers for a while, so it's gotta be aired out every so often to get rid. Leave the door open, or just get up to speed with the windows down.
> Stereo below halfway unless the windows are open
Sound pressure causes hearing loss.
>>14731805
Nah its not. But everything else is.
No feet on my dash. I know a girl is getting too comfortable with me when the feet go up. Then I have to lay down some rules. Sometimes I have to get rid of the girl
>>14730003
>What rules do you have about yours, /o/?
Seatbelts always. No smoking in the car. No blatantly beating the shit out of it. No telling me how to drive. That's about it. Not giving a shit is great.
>>14730003
rules:
>don't eat
>don't smoke
>seatbelts
>don't touch my controls or be psychotic in general.
>no parrots.
>>14733865
>tfw trees cum the hardest all over your miata
i always knew she was a slut
for some reason feet on the dash make me diamonds
radio volume on an even number or a multiple of 5, but lately Ive put it on 17 occasional. Havnt turned into a flaming wreck yet!
>>14739021
HIGH
TEST
>>14739039
SAVAGE
A
V
A
G
E
shitbox - no rules, you can even learn stick in it if you're so inclined
truck
>no one drives but me
>no eating
>no drinking except water and black coffee/tea
>no smoking except weed
>no dirty feet
>no feet anywhere except the floor
>>14730003
Nice cheese steak bro, Philly fag reporting it and regardless of were you got it that looks AUTHENTIC to me
I do a lot of 10hr+ road trips in my car so eating is ok. I only really put my foot down about smoking in my car but no one around me smokes.
Girlfriend used to love putting her pocketbook on my car while she did whatever, took forever to finally break her of that habit
>>14730003
>Always find a proper parking spot even if it means walking miles.
>Wash at least once a week.
>NEVER let an oil change wait.
>
>>14736708
>Don't ask me to un pair my phone from my head unit so you can pair yours
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
So glad i dont have friends anymore
>leave mountains of trash in my car
>change the music all the time
I'm incredibly OCD when it comes to sex.
After jerking it, I must wash my hands for 7 minutes. After having sex, I must wash, desinfect myself and use clorox wipes. After having girls over at my parents summer home, I most bleach, clean and wipe everything with clorox wipes before they arrive.
So, my car gets the same treatment. If I fuck someone in my car, or drive after fucking and not taking a shower and a seven minute handwash I get the clorox wipes I keep in my glovebox and:
>Take everything out of my pockets, and phone out of my case, onto my passenger seat.
>Use one wipe to wipe face, hands, neck, mouth and hair.
>Use one wipe to wipe phone, wallet, keys (car and home), and whatever else I have on me. If the wipe is still moist,do hair again and a first steering wheel wipe.
>Use one last wipe to wipe down everything inside the car that me or my gf touched, from steering wheel to switches.
Never has this rule been broken.
>>14739856
Do you do anything for the sex gasses?
>>14738978
There's gotta be a good story behind the no parrots rule, right?
>>14737052
>what is window tint?
>no crumby food
>don't ash in the damn car
>don't spill shit
>don't complain about the music being too loud
>don't complain about my driving
>don't use my car as a hookup location
>have mercy on my clutch if I'm not driving
>open the door or step out if you think you're going to yak (especially don't sit in the middle back)
generally when people compliment me on how my interior looks brand new, they will respect it and not fuck it up
>>14733865
>fucking trees and their pollen cum is all over my car
No, man. I was confused at first, too, but leaves are a pain in the ass to remove from between the hood and the windshield
Rules of the car:
>don't be a dick
>drinks with screw tops only
>center elbow rest is mine
>>14738872
>wanting to be paralyzed from the waist down in the event of an accident
I just don't understand women I guess
>>14738978
There is definitely a good story behind the no parrots rule lol
>>14737052
I park under trees for muh leather
>you can't drive my car unless youre a family member in an emergency
>no eating, drinks are okay as long as the cup has a lid
thats pretty much it, the people I surround myself with arent retards so nothing even happens when they ride with me
>driving with friend
>the reach for the radio
>slap their hand away
I know what shitty music you listen to cunt, and I don't want to hear it
>>14730003
>implying i own my own car
>>14739021
fuck im a dumbass, i read that as "COUNT STEP EVERY MAKE" like 3 times before i got it.....
>>14741216
>see it
>can't unsee it
not your fault m8
Absolutely no smoking or blazing
Vaping is ok if you open the window and it isn't fucking freezing out
Don't wedge trash into the seat pockets or some shit. Just throw it on the ground and take it when you leave.
No screaming
Please don't open the window on the highway.
Only I drive it unless you're a really close friend.
Don't drive until the idle drops below 1k
Use the seat belt if you're up front. That warning chime is annoying. I don't give a shit about the back seats.
Maximum occupancy is NINE. Two up front, four in the rear, three in the trunk. Ten doesn't work no matter how hard you try.
Don't mess with my AC. If you're cold then just close your vent
>>14730056
>cheesesteaks
>west coast
shiggydiggy
>>14730438
Didn't know other ppl from the valley posted on /o/...Not bad
>>14736891
I like you. We share the same principles. Does letting the oil heat up before you start to take the car out of the comfort zone make that much of a difference, i wouldn't know, i always take it slow.
>>14730003
>no eating
>no smoking
>no muddy shoes
>no fornicating
>no snowy shoes
>no blacks or Mexicans
>no putting on makeup
>implying friends
>>14731685
You suck
>I smoke, but no smoking in the car, ever, I will fucking cut you
I don't smoke in my car either, but if somebody wants to they can. The smell doesn't stick if somebody smokes a cig in there like once or twice a month
>no eating chocolate, cookies, sandwiches, hot dogs, basically anything that can crumble or spill sauce on the seats
Learn to eat like an adult
>don't lean on my car, ever
Why the fuck? Is it going to snap in half or something
>you cannot drive it - only I drive my car
Does your car suck or something? Don't want anybody to know how shitty it feels?
>dont park under trees
Autistic as fuck
>dont park next to spills when it rains
Even more autistic
>dont fuck with the air vents
What the hell? They're there to be used you dick
>dont fuck with the windows
Are they going to brake if you use them?
>dont open the fucking sun roof
Is it broken?
>dont SLAM the fucking door
I don't like it when people slam the door but I hate it even more when they close it too lightly so it doesn't go all the way closed
>no vaping
Why?
>no touching the radio/phone (bluetooth)
Why do you hate everybody?
>no fat chicks
Shitbox can't handle extra weight?
>cant get a ride if you have dirty pants with dirt and shit on them
Dick
>if you sit on the rear seat, dont use the pockets of the front seats
What the fuck why the fuck not?
>don't ever fucking touch any of the mirrors
This I can sorta understand since you're the only one driving it
Why are you so autistic about your pos?
My mates know which one of my cars is the "nice car" and what are the shitboxes.
I've told them that anything goes in the shitboxes but to mind their manners in the nicer cars.
They generally know how to behave though, always ask if it's fine to crack a beer or have a smoke in the car.
>>14738872
Why do women insist on doing this? Are they trying to relive a movie moment or is the added comfort worth the danger?
>no moving until everyone has a seatbelt on
>seatbelt on-lights on 15 minutes before sunset-turn key to ON-radio on, then ignition
>Mirror motor switch never on L or R if the car is moving
>eating while seated and car is off okay, drinking ONLY FROM OPEN SPOUT/STRAW if no traffic
>no feet on dash unless qt3.14gf which I will never have anyway
>no fucking smoking unless you can hold your cigarette outside AND BLOW OUTSIDE
>no fucking with the heat/air conditioning
>no touching my phone (navigation/music) unless I say so
I have no friends.
>>14736856
I don't let people smoke in my car. I don't generally mind vaping but if I'm driving in a busy area with a lot of shit going on (lots of pedestrians, other cars, construction, weird roads/intersections, etc.) and the vape scent is strong or distinct the added sensory stimulus can get on my nerves pretty quickly.
>>14730003
Slow down at stop lights (even if they're green)
Don't redline in neighborhoods
Never honk, if it's at night turn all your front lights off instead.
I made someone go to a full stop from 60 like that once.
>>14739964
>>14740774
not really
>be me
>go to pick up gf
>she says she has a "surprise" that i "must see"
>pic related is me going there
>arrive
>she comes out
>fucking parrot on her shoulder
>she bought a parrot
>the parrot looks at me
>"fuck off"
>gf says that's all he knows how to say yet
>asks me to take her to the vet
>be riding to the vet, gf in passanger seat, parrot in shoulder
>parrot moves over to my shoulder
>"ahhh, he likes you"
>ok, could you take him off please?
>gf goes to pick him up
>"fuck off"
>parrot bites my hear
>starts pulling
>at this point i'm freaking out and so is she,
>blood all over the seats and carpets
>try my best to keep cool
>brake car and come to a stop (highway)
>get bird in trunk
>patch up
>go to vet
never again
rules to normal people
>don't drink
>don't smoke
>don't touch my controls
>don't touch my radio
>seat belt
>close the windows at highway speeds
>don't touch the AC
rules to girls i'm trying to boink
>none
no smoking or vaping
no trash in the floor
absolutely no honking whatsoever
seat belts are a must
radio must be on at all times (except at drive throughs cuz that shit's rude)
>>14731827
Pretty much this.
>>14742127
You got off lightly if it didn't shit everywhere too.
>>14731857
Not unless you have hectic mods and care about spark plugs.. Worst I've ever done is let my car idles for too long and foul the plugs.
>>14739021
>Count Every Step Make
>>14730028
Curious, what are you driving? got a 1k volvo 940 but people generally smoke it silly when joyriding
>>14742247
I had to identify 3 trees just to post this..
HAHAH
No smoking, still on Rule #1
>>14730003
>no smoking period
>be careful when eating because if you make a mess you are cleaning it up
>you only get driving privileges after I've seen how well you drive
>don't spill beer
>don't smoke weed on main roads
>muddy shit goes in the bed
>no discharging of firearms out the window
