>putting a bomb or scissors next to an album counts as a review
>>65442688
it's a rating you idiot.
>>65442688
are you retarded?
>>65442688
Fuck this guy, he didnt like achtung baby
>giving all Sleater-Kinney albums an A
>shitposting on an anonymous music board counts as a discussion
>inb4 that Soulja Boy review
I wonder if he wasn't starting to go senile by that point.
>>65442688
he's like scaruffi except his craziness is grating rather than entertaining or interesting
>>65443386
>implying SB didn't influence almost every rapper this decade
Maybe the old guy was more ahead of the curve than you think.
>>65443521
now that i think about it, yeah, he's pretty influential, but that's not the same as good, maybe he thinks that way, but i sure don't
>>65443581
Oh well, then you're no different really from Xgau crapping on ITCOCK and Paranoid back in 1970 even though they invented entire new genres of music.
"It's influential, but it influenced music I personally dislike so fuck you."
>>65442688
>bombing the music industry
"A+ is a rare grade reserved for those albums that bring special joy and repeat listening to someone who has 300 other CDs to listen to."
He lost me when he gave As to Hole albums.
>implying CL's entire discography deserves As or Bs or Cs or anything but bomb symbols
GOAT
>>65443246
I suspect he only liked them because they were cute.
>>65443812
he's only listened to 300 albums in his whole life? total poseur. not a real critic.
>>65443613
What he's saying is influential does not mean good. And why do people default to paranoid as opposed to their self titled?
Christgau actually reminds me a lot of Henry Pleasants who wrote a book back in the 50s called "The Agony of Modern Music". Basically, Pleasants said that music started deteriorating with Wagner and the decline accelerated through Rachmanoff, Debussy, and Stravinsky.
Why? Pleasants argued that classical music from the late 19th century onward abandoned the simple, accessible melodies of Bach through Chopin and devolved into pretentious, self-indulgent crap that nobody but the composer himself and a few elite snobs could appreciate. He then said that jazz had risen up in the 20th century to replace classical as the center of accessible, melodic music, but by the time he wrote TAOMM in the 50s, it was starting to also become self-indulgent and pretentious.
So it's basically akin to Christgau's distaste for metal and prog since he felt that they rendered rock music pretentious and inaccessible to normies.
>>65444862
Your ideas are intriguing and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
>Four or five years late, they make selling out seem both easy! (unlike the major-label labor Ixnay on the Hombre) and fun! (unlike the fluke smash Smash). A dozen or two bpm faster than when they caught Green Day's punk wave, they sound like a Bad Religion whose catchy drone is at long last unencumbered by any message deeper than "The truth about the world is that crime does pay"--which, to their credit, makes them indignant--or, more generally, that "The Kids Aren't Alright." This truth they explore as fully as--but, as is only fitting given their relatively privileged upbringing, less solemnly than--any gangsta. Only on the title track do they get grandiose. And while keeping it light keeps them on the right side of their frat-boy base, it also makes the fuckups they mock and mourn seem all the more hurtful.
>A-
>>65442688
Bombs or scissors mean the album is bad in an uninteresting way. It doesn't warrant a review.
He didn't actually use the bomb/scissors system until the 90s though. He did used to write full reviews in the 70s-80s.
>D+
>>65445309
>implying
He wrote plenty of 1-2 sentence reviews back then and he also had shitbucket lists with artists who were so bad he couldn't waste his precious time reviewing them.
>>65442688
Yeah, he also molests children too. Seriously, look it up.
>>65445048
>all that passive-aggressiveness
>reviewing albums like a scorned suburban housewife
>>65445343
>Beware the forthcoming hype--this is ersatz shit.
>gives Red an A-
>>65445374
Look it up. Meltdown 1970s, Meltdown, 1980s, and Everything Rocks and Nothing Ever Dies 1990s.
>>65445440
why is every music critic a child rapist
>>65445633
why aren't you?
>>65445607
The last list was more like "Past-it 60s-70s artists who are still putting out albums for some unaccountable reason".
>>65445633
Where else do you think they get their "Pied Piper" like hypnosis skills from?
Why the fuck do you think you downloaded all that Kayne West, Death Grips, and Grimes?
"I will admit, I wasn't into Elvis back in the day. In fact, I kind of hated him. I remember hearing Love Me Tender on the radio about 3-4 times and liking the song before I knew it was him singing it. After that, I was forced to admit it was pretty catchy and that I also enjoyed All Shook Up. I wonder if I wasn't one of the very few Americans under 16 who wasn't entranced by the King's mighty pelvic gyrations. Bob Dylan lived for Elvis, to me he was just another greaseball. Perhaps Elvis was a little bit too intimidating to me. He reminded me of the rocks who used to beat me up in school. Certainly a lot more girls went nuts for him than me."
>>65445955
So basically Xgau was just like Kurt Cobain. "Waaah, I'm a speshul snowflake why did jocks always kick my ass in HS I wish I was a woman or gay."
>>65445440
>makes accusation
>can't prove it with link
>>65445955
Why does he compare himself to Bob Dylan, is he under the illusion he has a shred of talent for doing anything?
>>65446069
>nuh uh! google isn't my friend either!
>>65445955
Frank Zappa didn't like Elvis either desu.
>>65444862
nice post. will look him up
>>65446050
>projecting
>>65442688
The letter grade system was easier to understand (for normies) agreed
>>65442688
christgau's reviews are always challenging. he's a great writer; and probably a good critic, at the very least because he's open to, and has listened to, pretty much everything.
you don't have to agree w/ him /mu/.
>>65446155
Zappa was also straightedge and he's dead. What's your point?
>>65446521
>and has listened to, pretty much everything.
Scaruffi has listened to waaay more than Christgau, that is just fact.
>>65446155
>zappa
>good
>>65443339
No one said it does
>>65446577
scaruffi is a robot who doesn't understand art
Christgau is a bigger talentless hack than Gene Simmons
>>65446648
How is Christgau any better?
>>65446648
And Christgau is an overly snarky poptimist prick who cares more about looking intelligent than reviewing music.
>>65443246
>>65444480
they are all As
prove me wrong
>>65446753
christgau is a talented and thoughtful writer.
>>65446753
Because he shows humanity and warmth when talking about music he loves. scaruffi autistically dissects shit without an ounce of emotion.
>>65446788
>literally projecting
>>65444480
this is also why he gives MIA great ratings
>>65446831
The only part that could be labeled projecting is "cares more about looking intelligent than reviewing music." Everything else I said is fact.
>>65446814
Scaruffi sometimes shows a bit of passion when he's talking about music he loves.
>>65446814
wtf are you talking about? Scaruffi talks about emotion all the time. do you even read what he writes? a lot of his favorite albums/artists he enjoys because of emotion. he just places more importance on innovation and originality than other critics.
the only worthwhile critic is Lester Bangs. anyone who assigns numbers to art isn't a real music fan in my eyes
>>65446545
>Zappa was also straightedge
>guy who bitched about musicians using drugs
>chain-smoked and lived on a fast food diet
>>65446521
>christgau's reviews are always challenging. he's a great writer; and probably a good critic, at the very least because he's open to, and has listened to, pretty much everything.
Not including the dozens of artists in his Meltdown shitbucket that he considered beneath his dignity to review?
>>65442688
Prefer him to rejects like Marcel.
I always felt that the issue with Xgau and music critics in general is that they only seem to care about the lyrical content of the stuff, yet anyone with half a brain would know you don't listen to AC/DC for deep, thought-provoking lyrics so much as Angus and Malcolm's guitar jams.
>Audioslave [Epic/Interscope, 2002] *bomb*
>Out of Exile [Epic/Interscope, 2005] *bomb*
Oh fuck you, Xgau.
>>65447603
>listening to Audioslave
costanza.jpg
>>65447603
>unironically liking Audioslave
I've never listened to an Audioslave song desu so I couldn't really tell you what they're like except given the era, it was probably some horrible nu metal bullshit.
>>65448410
it's not nu-metal, it's like bro-grunge
>Tonight The Stars Revolt [DreamWorks, 1999] *bomb*
...
>>65448442
He warned you he doesn't like meal.
>>65447603
>Audioslave
>bomb
this is correct though
>>65447143
>no true music fan
>>65442688
Giving an album a rating... Opinions change, plus someones rating will be different from yours so why bother?
>>65447143
That faggot has been dead for decades.
"The current direction of music (1980) has left a lot of my generational colleagues discouraged. However, unlike most of them, I'd prefer not to let my turntable go to seed or else ignore everything happening now and instead simply wear out multiple copies of The Who Sell Out."
>>65446521
He writes like two words for an album lmao
Bomb means bad like a terrorist?
Scissors means good like choice cut?
Sorry I not from English so I'm not good.
>>65446155
frank zappa's opinion on music actually mattered considering
>>65447165
He didn't bitch about musicians using drugs, dumbass, he just didn't want his music attributed to drugs.
ITT: buttmad progfags
>>65449469
If it's an album he doesn't like. Of course when the artist is one of his pets like Dylan, Neil Young, Bonnie Rait, or Sonic Youth, he'll write entire essays about each album of theirs and their influence/place on music as a whole.
>>65449519
How so? Zappa never gave one interview or wrote one album where he didn't shit on someone or something. The man literally hated anything that wasn't classical.
