>Hey Anon, you want to come over to my house for my Family Home Evening? We sit around the family table playing board games and read scripture together! It's alot of fun! Come and try one of Mom's Rice Krispies... or seven, haha!
Shimmerfag pls
>>25829973
That actually sounds quite pleasant.
>>25830418
No it doesn't, stupid normies reeeeeeeeeeeee
>>25829973
Silly starlight, I'm a heathen and won't ever be religious
>>25829973
Maybe. What board games do you play there Starlight?
>>25829973
You're not Jewish are you?
>>25829973
That's sounds____fun
>>25829973
Wow, Starlight you are such a nice girl
And your smile is really cute
I will sure go
>>25829973
Sounds great! Hope you don't mind I'm an atheist.
>>25829973
>she's actually a satanist
>reading scripture meant reading unholy incantations
"Family Home Evening? What, I'm part of your family now?"
>She smiles at you
>"If you want to be!"
>Not gonna lie, your heart went up a few degrees
"Alright, alright. One condition."
>"And what's that, Anon?"
"Eight rice krispies."
>"YAHTZEE!"
>FUCK ME her grandmother won again. You wish you learned how to play this game before tonight so you wouldn't get crushed in front of Glimmer by a mare whose skin looked like a deflated balloon.
>The room laughs and you can't help but join in. Ponies are slapping each other's backs - including yours.
>Equestria hasn't felt like a home for you since you got here. You would've been ostracized if it were not for Twilight, and even then it took a few months for ponies to warm up to you.
>Now, in this moment, you don't miss the life you had before.
>You and Glimmer lock eyes for a moment before tearing away and acting like it didn't happen.
>You can't believe this is happening.
>"Okay every'body', time for scripture!"
>Shit, forgot about that.
"O-okay, should I just -"
>The lights are dimmed as several deep red candles are lit.
>You can barely see anything, but you make out every single family member donning a black robe that they procured from seemingly nowhere.
>The Yahtzee grandma is drawing a shape on the floor with white chalk... looks like a shitty illustration of...
"A fucking pentagram?"
>One of the cloaks are handed to you by a neighbor, but it takes you a second to realize that it's Starlight.
"Star, what the hell is this?"
>"Oh, nice pun Anon! You have the greatest sense of humor."
>She blushes.
>Pun?
>Holy shit, they're Satanists. SHE'S a Satanist.
"You're a goddamn Satanist?!"
>"HA! Another zinger. I like you, Anon. I hope we can hang out some more after this."
>She's REALLY cute. It makes you hesitate long enough to allow the door, previously open, to be shut and barred by a hooded pony.
>>25830471
Parcheesi
>One of the ponies - you think it's her father - steps to the edge of the pentagram and speaks.
>"Allow us to begin the weekly ritual by welcoming Anon, the unholy abomination."
>"Welcome, Anon!" They all greet enthusiastically.
>EXCUSE ME?
"What did you call me?"
>Starlight wraps her hoof around your arm and shakes it for a second.
>"Anon, don't be rude! It's the opening statement, then the guest speaker!"
>You nearly say "Jesus Christ," but think better of it.
>"Anon has been found and brought to us by Starlight the Blood Drinker, and the Unholy Master is grateful for her loyalty. Starlight earns one gold star on the board."
>A light is brought to the darkest corner of the room, where a chalkboard is covered in rows of names, each bearing different numbers of stars.
>Starlight's has another one added to it. She has the most.
>You try to hold in laughter while trying to hold in your lunch. This is bizarre!
>"Anon, most disgusting creature from the depths of Tartarus, have you anything to say?"
>Starlight nudges you and gives a gentle smile.
>Holy fuck
"Er, yeah. Thanks for the invitation, and um. Yeah, the games were fun."
>The hoods are silent. The speaker turns his head to look at you.
>"Anything else? Anything you might want to... report?"
>OH SHIT
"Satan... Satan sends his thanks and wants you to keep up the good work."
>...
>The crowd claps for 3 seconds before ceasing all at once, the room deadly silent once more.
>Starlight beams at you, her smile as cute as ever.
>"I can't believe how cool this is!"
>You can't believe how fucked this is.
>Here goes the leader again.
>"Oh great terribleness, please grace us lesser mortals with your presence upon the pentagram."
>Oh man. You'd really rather not, but you don't want to think about the ways they'd try to kill a treacherous "demon."
"S-sure thing, dude! Haha."
>>25829973
Okay, but I get to pick the game! And the god.
>As you step into the circle, the chalk begins to glow and turn into a red darker than your blood.
>"Lorem Ipsum. Lorem Ipsum," they chant.
>You start to feel heat rising from the ground beneath you, making the air seem to bend in front of you.
>"Lorem Ipsum, Lorem Ipsum!"
>You hear whispers that seem familiar to you. Your grandmother is reminding you to ear your peas, but she died years ago.
>"Lorem! Ipsum! Lorem! Ipsum!"
>Is that... your dog?
"Come here, Bandit! Bandit, boy, come here!"
>Are those tears or blood coming out of your eyes?
"LOREM IPSUM LOREM IPSUM"
>You look to Glimmer but don't see anyone there. She's been swept into the fervor, yelling the chant as if that's all that matters.
>Whoops! There goes the nine rice krispies you ate.
>The excitement ends as soon as your upchuck breaks the symbols on the ground.
>The ponies' chanting takes a while to die out as they realize one by one that nothing's happening anymore.
>You clothes are steaming and you shit your pants.
>Glimmer's family just seems bummed out, not angry or anything.
>Her father whips off his hood, revealing his large glasses and wimpy mustache. He's still got some guac on his face.
>"Golly darnit! There goes another night. All these silly abominations never hold up."
>He comes over and gives you a pat on the back.
>"Well, you're okay in my book, sonny. Heck, I'd even let you date my daughter!"
>He waggles his eyebrows and Starlight blushes.
>You cry a little bit and mutter something about your pants.
>"Now who wants to play charades!"
END
>>25829999
Hahahaha... oh boy, quads. We're getting serious.
>>25829973
>Implying you have a family.
As far as know the only one that actually cared about you was Sunburst. Then he left you.
