Marital Problems Thread #7
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Still Rolling Edition
Previous Thread: >>22450495
>You are Anonymous, and you are married to the pony of your dreams.
>At least, you WERE.
>You've been having some issues as of late.
The premise of this thread can cover a multitude of issues. Maybe you and your wife are fighting over something insignificant. Maybe the spark just isn't there anymore. Either side is welcome to have issues with the other.
If cuckoldry is your thing, sorry to say, but that's pretty frowned upon in here.
New content is welcome, and discussion encouraged.
Pastebin of previous threads and current stories thus far: http://pastebin.com/ARKY1Kny
Pastebin for aspiring writers (general concepts and techniques):
http://pastebin.com/V1ujiyJt
http://pastebin.com/whCQ2GpX
http://pastebin.com/bnMmZ2T3
>>22574797
First for Moona.
>>22574797
Okey, I'm going to dump my story here again, so more people will see it and give opinions:^)
>You are Anon
>At least, you think you are.
>Your mind is shattered into the million pieces, after you found your lovely wife riding another stallion at your own house.
>And this happened on the Heart's Warming Eve, the day you asked her out..
>You just wanted to get her by surprise and give her these beautiful flowers, which are lying in the trash can, next to her house now.
>You're now walking down the street, going nowhere, with no purpose to live or breathe.
>What can you do, when over four years of 'true' love has just ended?
>Why did she do it to you?
>How long has she been doing this?
>Did she even love you?
>Your internal monologue would last longer, but somepony has just ran over you.
>This made your blood in veins boil.
>Your eyes went red as you shout words going straight from your soul.
>These words are filled with all kinds of emotions you could come up with.
>You even don't mind all the stares you're catching
>You don't mind everything.
>Yes, you have no reasons to live here now.
1/?
>>22574807
>As you walk farther you hear voices, calling you "a monster", "an animal" and "the crazy monkey"
>Usually you talk to these ponies, asking them why they're insulting you.
>But not today.
>Today, this made your tears fall.
>You started to run, this time you have the target.
>Your old home, probably your only home now.
>You remember the day of your arrival
>The day, when everyone was happy.
>All those smiles, you will never forget them.
>She was the first to welcome you in this world.
>Yes, she was your guide.
>She has explained to you everything, every rule.
>She has introduced you to everypony here.
>Everyone was kind to you, even mayor of Ponyville gave you a house.
>The house you are heading to.
>After a few days after your arrival, you started working at the Sweet Apple Acres, helping with gathering apples.
>Months were passing, as Big Mac became your closest friend, your brother.
>You could talk to him nearly about everything.
>But could he understand the meaning of the betrayal?
"This just doesn't matter now."
>You say to yourself, simultaneously opening the door.
>As you look inside, your lungs are starting to cover with dust.
>You haven't been there for over three years.
>You have moved out, in the day of your marriage.
>As much, as you don't want to, your brain is starting to remind you everything about that day.
2/?
>>22574813
>You start to scour everything in the house, concurrently feeling the darkness embracing you.
>You have always been afraid of depression, especially when this was the thing, which got you here.
>You feel shiver going down on your backbone as you remind the day of your final decision.
>The 44. was your rescue. Your best friend. Probably your only friend.
>Now you don't want to think about it anymore.
>Resigned you fall on your old bed, and fall asleep.
>Immediately, your brain is filled with the song, you were listening back on Earth.
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ATxLct2jDo [Embed]
>As you carefully listen to the lyrics, you begin to cry internally.
>"Beautiful, but such a lonely creation, isn't it?" You hear voice behind you.
>This has scared the living shit out of you.
>You find yourself endlessly falling, screaming for help.
>"Don't let yourself succumb to the darkness!.."
>You wake up, still hearing those fading words.
>Someway, it was really creepy.
>Looking at the clock, you see that it's already half past ten. It's your working time.
"Applejack will understand a one day off"
>You need to talk to your 'sweetheart'- as you usually called her.
>Regardless how, you're going to do it.
3/?
Okey, I'm going to write more ASAP.
All opinions will be appreciated.Thanks guys
>>22565624 #
Without_Aname out of fucking nowhere
I was able to get some done. I'll post it after I wake up and can properly look it over instead of rushing. Sorry work got nuts.
>>22574816
>After eating the breakfast, your mind is starting to get bombarded by tons of ideas.
>Ideas connected to the betrayal of your wife.
>You shuffle and think about them, one after the other one.
>You're not sure how much time you spent on that, sudden banging on your door made you jump and fall from your chair.
"WHAT THE HELL!"
>With a face expressing anger and soreness, you open the door.
>"Howdy Anon!, Ain't you sorry for not goin' to the work today huh?, Ah have started to worry about ya!"
>You really did not expect this
>You're not ready for this
>But you feel the internal pressure of throwing these words out.
"Come inside, I'll tell you something"
>She must have noticed your petulant voice, as she stares at you with compassion
>Without asking any other questions, she goes into your house
>She sits on your sofa and says:
>"What did happen Anon?, Ya' know, ya' can trust mah"
"I know that"
>"Soo?" She looks at you slightly turning her head.
>She looks so adorable in this position.
>But this is not the time for compliments.
"I'm leaving AJ"
>"WAIT, what did ya' say?"
"I'm leaving this town"
>You said it in more vexatious voice than you wanted.
>"Ya' are joking right?"
"You should know it better AJ"
4/?
>>22575440
>This made her cry a little bit.
>Okey, more than a little bit.
>Now it doesn't matter what would you say. The damage is done.
>"B-but what 'bout helpin' me on the farm, ya' have been there for over four years! What 'bout Big Mac, ya' want to leave him too?"
"It is a truly hard decision for me, but I have seen something.. something which I should never seen."
>Your voice got that dark and somber, that she curls up into a little ball.
>Looking at you, with mercifulness in her eyes, she says
>"W-what did ya' s-see?"
"My own wife, betraying me with some fucking orange-maned white stallion"
>Her expression immediately changes to unreadable.
>"A-ah think Ah know what a-are ya' talkin' 'bout, b-but Twilight would never do that again!"
"Again? AGAIN? What the fuck are you talking about!?"
>Shit, you need to start controlling your own voice dude.
>She curls up even tighter.
>"S-she had been with o-other stallion b-before ya'"
>Why didn't Twilight tell you about it?!
>You were honest and truthful to her
>It seems, that she wasn't.
5/?
>>22575447
"Continue please"
>"S-so, she had been with him for 'bout, t-two years"
>Two fucking years, She told you, that you're her first partner...
>"O-one day this orange-maned stallion called Fire Streak c-caught her havin' some fun with other stallion"
>So you weren't even the second one! How great...
>"H-he found her doors locked, s-so he destroyed them, and.. and h-he destroyed the other stallion t-too..."
>"She was screaming for help, when her coltfriend's head got ripped off."
>"H-his anger made him that powerful, so s-she couldn't even stop him"
>"She tried to beg for mercy, she had even promised, that she is goin' to do everything for him.
>"His decision was really surprising, he had forgiven her. But what he has done, made him compelled to stay behind the Canterlot's bars for five years...
>"Twilight was visiting him every month, until you arrived"
>So THIS was her purpose to go to the Canterlot that often...
>You were just her puppet.
>Her fucking puppet.
"Why are you telling me all these things?"
>Your voice is fully venomous
>"A-ain't Ah the e-element of the h-honesty? Ah, can't lie!"
"So why didn't you tell me about this before this whole thundering thing happened?!"
>"Ah and whole Ponyville had been thinking, that she found her missing half. I-it was going so well. We even have forgotten about this, but we had never thought, that she was going to... betray again."
>>22575455
>6/?
Okey, that's all for now.
What are your opinions?
>>22575440
I like this AJ.
Straight to the plot.
>>22575447
Again cliche. Pretty nice one.
>>22575455
>Anon as the second best.
I'm pleased.
This AJ is great.
>>22575461
At first: More.
At second: It will be great story.
At third: This AJ is great.
I can't wait to see what will happen next.
>>22575491
Thanks mate! Already wrote the next post:^)
I will drop some green when I manage to write at least three of them.
Thread is going slow, I will bump it so it doesn't die. We have come far since that first Adulterous Twilight thread.
>>22576216
What were you doing after piece5?
>>22576216I will try to fasten this thread then
>>22575455
>As time passes, the deafening silent ruling in the room speaks louder than any words that could be spoken.
>That, this, It just can't be true.
>Only if you didn't hear this 'heresy' from The Element of the Honest...
>You feel your soul burning
>You feel your soul screaming, tearing your body and plunging your body into neverending pain.
"Thank you Applejack"
>You say it staring at the floor, but your gaze looks, like you're looking into the hell at the moment.
>You silently hope that you will find your 'wife' here.
>"A-ah should have told you 'bout this, A-ah'm really sorry sugarcube."
"It was not your fault at all. It was nobody's fault. It was just my own fault"
"I was just too trustful... I will be leaving in a few days"
>Your gloomy voice slowly fades out, as you begin to pack your things.
>"A-ah, A-ah'm, sorry"
>As she passes your doors quietly crying, you hear her silently saying
>"Just come back, please"
"I can't promise anything now."
7/?
>>22576398
>You're Twilight, the Princess of Friendship
>And you have no idea where your Nonny can be.
>You're really glad, that he didn't come to you yesterday
>You smile while thinking about it
>But today is the day, when both of you planned an experiment.
>He always loved your experiments and tests.
>Even when being your guinea pig.
>Though he didn't give you any present on your anniversary, you have something for him.
>You just need to find him.
>He often stays late at the Sugarcube Corner, so this the first place you're heading too.
>Finding the bakery closed, you bang on the door.
>"Hiiya Twilight! What brings you there? It is scarcely six o'clock! But it's never too early for a party!"
>She says throwing at you some ballons
>Her smile can sometimes be really creepy, especially when she is smiling from ear to ear.
>Trying to force a smile you say.
"I'm looking for Anon, Did you see him yesterday or today?"
>"Huh? Naaah, You want to organize a spectacle for him? Or maybe performance? Just gimme some time!"
"Pinkie! I'm just looking for him!"
>She clearly saddened
>"No, I didn't see him"
>This lamentable voice..
>Only Pinkie can go from full-happy mode to the cheerless mood in less than a few seconds.
>You didn't know, that soon you will find yourself capable of doing it too.
8/?
>>22576398Of course I meant fasten this thread to the page 1 :^)
>>22576420
>You're Anon again.
>And you have no clue where you can mislay.
>You just want to quietly disappear, but now it is not possible.
>You still have your 'Prince' title, and most of ponies know most things about you.
>Packing up your things, your old acoustic guitar catches your gaze.
>Your brain roughly reminds you, that you've played several songs for Twilight on it.
>However, this is the only thing, which came with you from the Earth.
>You start to gently scour it, trying to not destroy the old strings.
>After some time, your work is done.
>You just can't restrain yourself from trying to play on it afresh.
>Trying to play some chords, you find that your instrument is out of tune, and you have no idea how did sound the tuned one.
>Anyway you pack it, mainly because most of your things are still in your and Twilight's house.
>You take everything from the house, that could be useful on your self-proclaimed banishment.
>As you close the door of your old house, some tears fall from your eyes.
>You know, that you're not going to come back.
9/?
>>22576480
>After you ended your contemplating, you decide to go to the Manehattan.
>It seems to be the best place to start.
>It's far enough to forget about this place
>It's big enough to find a job
>It's civilized enough to be not persecuted
>At least these are your assumptions.
"There is no way back now"
>Your internal monologue is going on, concomitantly with moving wheels of the train.
>Some ponies are looking at you, you even hear a filly crying because it has just seen you.
>Am I really that monstrous?
>Am I really that different?
>Eh, stupid rhetolical question.
>Time passes by, you spend it on watching landscapes of the Equestria
>It is such a wonderful place
>So why it needs to be filled with all this fear...
10/?
>>22576501
And that's all I have got for now.
Hope that you will enjoy it, and as always, looking forward to see your opinions guys.
>>22576301
I lurked a little in that thread after he went away, and then the thread died, At the time I was in four theads wich two (piece5 and another one) of them died, I was in the dazzlings general but there was too much shitstorming for my taste, and then I had this thread, well, when it was the Adulterous Twilight thread, now we have a baby general.
>>22576530
I missed you, faggot.
Without_Aname, we summon you!
APPEAR
>>22576501
This is pretty good, though, I don't see where this is going, but this is just the beggining, I hope AJ gives Sparklebitch a lesson like pic related.
>>22576568
Me too, m8.
Do you know where Guitar Guy is?
>>22576943
Of course.
>>22574946
We should keep ourselves closer.
Find me on skype, if you want.You know how to call me.
>>22577011
I don't have skype.
Also, you don't seem to be Fapman, and piece5 is most probably >kill.
You can be Anonymität, or Fapman.
>>22577124
Baby Luna!
Because, what? I'm decent now!
I'm trying, at least.
I even write, but it not as good as I would like to.
>>22577172
It's because your English is getting better.
Also, lets stop talking, we are going to scare the anons.
>>22577226
Install skype.
I need a proof reader.
>>22576501
Twalot is too slutty in this story.
>>22577359
Except that no one in this board knows about me. And I don't really want to talk with people I know in generals because generals are not the places to do that shit.
>>22577369
She is too slutty in every green in this general, shit, she was even more slutty in the Adulterous Twilight threads.
>>22577438
I know about you. If I recall I've called you out for being a faggot a couple of times. I think that was back in the original adulterous Twilight threads. You've shit up this board more than once, faggot
>>22576398
>Heresy cliche
More cliches!
Broken Anon who wants to run away?
I love it.
>>22576420
>You're Twilight, the Princess of Friendship
Let me fix it.
>You're Twilight, the slut of the killer.
>And you have no idea where your Nonny can be.
I felt a shudder here.
>>22576480
Shattered Anon?
You made him well.
>You know, that you're not going to come back.
It's sad.More.
>>22576501
>Some ponies are looking at you, you even hear a filly crying because it has just seen you.
Kek!
>So why it needs to be filled with all this fear...
Because you can eat them. One by one.
>>22576512
I like it.
The way you descibe his sadness. Not fury, sadness. It's different. It's fresh.
captcha: paind
>>22577527
It's so easy to tell when Fapman posts, even without a name
>>22577543
It's not a crime to feedback.
>>22577462
If I don't remember wrong you are the guy that feels insecure about people namefaggin'.
>>22577519
Also, I crearly said to him, that we need to stop talking so the thread keeps on topic.
>>22577577
>insecure about namefagging
No, I just understand that I'm not a special snowflake who has to have a name on all the time. You, on the other hand... It's basically an attention whore thing.
>>22577585
I really can't understand your problem here, He is using a name, And I really don't mind it. He's giving a feedback, more or less precisely, but he's giving it.
Fapman is a good feedback source tooOf course omitting his English, which is already getting better...
He is pointing the individual sentences and comments them. It's a good kind of opinion for writefags.
>>22577608
Nope.
I overpassed my need of that.
>>22577639
>>22577653
Thank you.
>>22577663
>I overpassed my need of that
First off, wat. Second, you still fucking do it, so I don't know what you're trying to say.
>>22577662
It's the default "simbol" you cumstain. If you weren't desperate for people's approval you wouldn't have that name in the first place. You "like it" because it gets you attention. Shit, you're probably eating this up just because I'm talking to you.
>>22577639
Fapman just leaves a bitter taste in my mouth by now. It triggers me greatly that he took the name off yet every single fucking time he posts he tells people "HAY. HAY GUIS. I'M FAPMAN, DID YOU KNOW THAT? I'M THE SAME GUY."
He's still a complete faggot.
>>22577703
Welcome to /b when people hates for hate gods...
Oh, it's /mlp?
Who cares?
>>22577639
I think Fapman should learn how to write in proper english before trying to comment on other people's writing
>>22577703
>Second, you still fucking do it, so I don't know what you're trying to say.
Okey I must stop here. You are telling him to stop writing the feedbacks because you don't like the way how they look?Please, think...
Next thing, Mr. Anony Mous is NOT getting attention by his name. He's getting it, because he writes well, and with sense.Are you jealous?
And third thing:
> "HAY. HAY GUIS. I'M FAPMAN, DID YOU KNOW THAT? I'M THE SAME GUY."
Where the fuck did he write that?
Just stop baiting this hard man.
>>22577770
But Fapman is a faggot
>>22577703
Except that I haven't done anything for people to approve me, also, it doesn't get me any attention, it's just a name, the only one in this board that gives me attention because of it it's you and some other faggots like you who are entlited to their opinions. Also, I don't really know why I am even talking to you at this point this is the worst bait I have seen in here.
>>22577770
>Okey I must stop here. You are telling him to stop writing the feedbacks because you don't like the way how they look?
I'm telling him to stop announcing who he is
>Next thing, Mr. Anony Mous is NOT getting attention by his name. He's getting it, because he writes well, and with sense
The only reason anyone knows who he is is because of the name. He produces no content, and if he does, he uses the name on every fucking thread regardless. It's an attention seeking thing. It always was. There is no benefit to using the name other than to get attention from other anons. That is exactly what's happening now. I sort of regret giving it to him, but someone needs to tell him how much of a faggot he is.
>Where the fuck did he write that?
He obviously didn't write that word for word you illiterate fuck. If you actually read this thread he has told people who he is on multiple posts. That defeats the whole fucking purpose of taking off the name. He is just as attention-seeking as the other fag.
Also,
>are you jealous?
Nice way to attempt to ignore the actual arguments, faggot.
> mfw waking up to this on the board.
>>22576622
I have a little bit to put up when the back and fourth stops.
>>22575455
eh... good effort but it's a bit too autistic for me. AJ's emotions/response is way too strong and out of the blue. seems to be a textbook case of you are writing with yourself as the audience, ie. you are assuming the reader's image of the character and the scene is as complete as the image you have in your head. but the reader is left feeling like there are sentences missing.
also, the OP fight, especially "head got ripped off" is ultra edgy... and Twi's response to that situation just seems way ooc.
alot of the issues will be english i suspect. not so much english grammatical (which is pretty good) as cultural/usage. ie. maybe you didn't literally mean "ripped his head off" but that's an expression in your language meaning got beat up bad. that, and lots of cultures seem to be alot more explicit and exaggerated about emotions, and i can't into that.
anyway, for my taste it would have to be toned down a bunch.
>>22578181
>> mfw waking up to this on the board.
no fucking kidding.
this is the most pathetic shitstorm i've seen on /mlp/ in a while.
Okey I'm back!
>>22576943
>>22577527
Thanks for all the opinions guys
>>22578211
Hmm, I will keep that in mindDude, I listened to drama music, while I was writing this :^)
Continuing - This is my first story, so I'm really glad that I'm getting feedback.
Also, I'm going to drop some green before sleep. Stay tuned
>>22578181
Please, post, the shitstorm has ended.
Should I bother.
>>22578642
Only green can calm the storm
>>22578642
Good, mods have deleted this whole spiderman stuff.Maybe story time?
>>22578642
It's me >>22576530
Just post, or wait until mods get this cunt out of hee.
>>22565624 #
> The song is over and a new one has begun, but she stays holding onto you almost cherishing your embrace.
> Music To My Ears (PON3 Remix):https://youtu.be/-bP4trLjo5k
> The new song that plays is a much faster pace and the party around you becomes louder and more alive again.
> Ponies dance lively, drink and cheer as the excited little DJ mixes away.
> Lights flash and change color feeding the mood.
> But you both still sway slightly not wanting to let the moment go, the new music pace and energy not entering either of your ears more than a muffled background noise.
> Your victory of remaining composed is bitter sweet.
> There was nothing more you wanted than to let loose and let whatever was going to happen, happen.
> Twilight went as far as she did... and as far as you're concerned you're done wi...stop thinking about her...
> You release your embrace on your dancing partner as the cooler air hits both your skin bringing you back to reality.
> Luna takes a small step back still maintaining eye contact, attempting to muster some sort of composure.
> Her eyes are full of desire for you but her words contradict that, " We must apologize once more my dear Anonymous. We... we don't know what came over us... We respect your composure and resolve. Like always, you cease to intrigue us." Her facial features show a hint of saddeness.
> Guilt finds its way into you picking up on that.
"Luna.. Believe me. I'm sure I'll be hating myself later, but.. I need things to be done.. completely.. Before I can even think of.. you know.. 'dancing' " you finger quote. " o.or.. anything like that. .. Not to say that, you know that...I don't w-want...i.. i.. I don't know anymore.. I'm sorry.."
> Your voice dies off as you confuse yourself.
89/?
>>22578851
Lurking.
>>22578851
>Like always, you cease to intrigue us.
That sounds terrible.
>>22578851
>"Luna.. Believe me. I'm sure I'll be hating myself later, but.. I need things to be done.. completely.. Before I can even think of.. you know.. 'dancing' " you finger quote. " o.or.. anything like that. .. Not to say that, you know that...I don't w-want...i.. i.. I don't know anymore.. I'm sorry.."
Muh nigga. Anon is better than Whorelight.
>>22578851
This is pretty good. I wonder what Cadence has to say about this entire situation, but if she is going to choose a side, it won't be the little purple bitch side.
>>22579073
Yes it does, also, wouldn't it be "you never cease to intrige us".
>>22578851
>you cease to intrigue us
Should be;
>"You never cease to intrigue us."
Captcha was ghbom
>>22579073
Ya I just re read that. It's wrong. I guess i didnt save an edit. I meant to put something along the lines of
> As always, you have yet ceased to...
Whoops
>>22579174
>That file name tho'
>>22578851
Nice work m8, I love reading your story.Yeah, you can make the reader addicted to your work
I think I will drop my green then, as promised:
>>22576501
>You finally arrived at the place, which you'll be calling home soon.
>You talked to the mayor of Manehattan, presenting yourself as the 'poor immigrant' and it actually worked.
>It's just a small flat in the center of Manehattan, but it's big enough to live here without any obstacles.
>You begin to unpack all the things you got from Ponyville
>It's not that much, just a couple of boxes and a backpack.
>And there is your first mistake.
>You didn't take any money from home, because all of it are currently in Twilight's house.
>Fuck.
>You find yourself without any money, with just some needless things.
>And with guitar.
>This gave you an idea.
>Taking the instrument with you, you head to the closest music shop.
>'Closest' meh, Apparently the shop is placed on the edge of the town.
>And this is just a little building with an even smaller slogan.
>Slowly losing hope, you knock at the front door.
>After a few minutes, an old unicorn stallion opens the 'gate'.
>"Hello there, my big friend. What can I help you?"
>Woah man, you didn't expect seeing THAT old stallion there, even his voice is more grating than you have thought.
"I'm looking for a place, when I can tune this guitar into its original tuning."
>"So you came to the right place then, Don't stay there! Come inside"
11/?
>>22579174
Are you posting from your phone?
>>22579272
>As you enter his little house, you begin to be surprised by the amount of instruments here.
>They're everywhere, literally.
>Lying on the floor, standing on the holders, attached to the walls.
>They're various instruments, going from violins, through all kinds of the guitars, to even the cellos and pianos.
>He must noticed your stare as he laugh and say
>"Yeah son, My whole life is connected to the music, now gimme this guitar, and I will see what can I do"
>Unsteadily you give him your guitar and look over him to see what he'll do with it.
>"Oh boy, where did you store this equipment? Its condition is fatal..."
>He begin to repair the implement using his hooves and magic.
>Someway it looks both funny and frightfully to see him using his big hooves in this little guitar.
>You get bored very quickly, so you walk towards the instruments looking at them.
>These things are made perfectly, every detail is finished.
>You're really amazed by their quality.
>But they aren't build like those built on the Earth...
>His voice gets you out of your stream of thoughts
>"Hey, big one, come here."
>As you walk in his direction you see a guitar.
>But, is this your guitar?
>It looks completely different. It's much prettier than your one.
>"I have looked through your instrument... This is not our world's device..."
12/?
>>22579289
>"So I decided to throw some my solutions into it"
>He hands you your guitar back
>His gaze evidently says 'Come on, play on it'
>Still unsure you pick up your instrument and play some chords.
>The sound coming from the soundboard made you astounded
>You are not sure if this is even possible.
"What kind of sorcery is this?"
>"30 years of making instruments lad."
"So how can I pay you for your work?"
>"Just play for me at least one song from your origin place"
>Holy shit, actually it's kinda hard, especially when you haven't played for four years..
>But only the stupid one would decline.
>You start to play the song your mother had played to you once you were young.
>The exactly song she had played before she died in the car crash.
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=koczXygKlWU
>As the final sound fades you find the old stallion crying.
>Hey! It's not fair! You didn't make that much mistakes!
>"S-so this is the kind of music which is popular in your world..."
>"Let me acknowledge that your payment is done, I-I'm really grateful"
>Without any other word spoken he goes upstairs.
>So, This is your time to go, huh?
>As you cross the door frame, you feel the compassion for him.
>He is so lonely...
>Anyway, this is not your thing now.
>You are heading to the Central Park
13/?
>>22578851
> You don't even know what you were thinking.
> What just drove you to this situation with Luna?
> It didn't feel wrong by any means, in fact it felt like nothing you have experienced in quite some time, but how did it get to here?
> You have every intention to never see Twilight again...
> Your chest aches when her name makes it's way into your head again.
> But you don't know why, you truly never wanted to see her again.
> Luna displays an understanding smile masking saddened eyes.
> " Like we said Anonymous... We are sorry. You have been in our thoughts for so long. We tried to protect you in whatever way we could, significant or not. Whether it be from bad dreams and memoriesto distracting you from the pain you're feeling currently." She breaks eye contact.
> "We were being selfish just now. Not considering how soon such a... traumatic experience could still be affecting you. Putting our own.. wants.. before considering this. We want you to.... well..." she pauses looking to collect herself with a deep breath and articulate, the way she loves to. "... We can only hope you forgive us in our lack of... discretion. It's just... that, Anon.."
> She looks to the ground embarrassed, a pink hue crossing her cheeks. "Nevermind.. We apologize."
> She is hiding how flustered she is as some of her stary midnight mane falls over her face.
" It takes two to dance Luna" you say to her trying to lighten the mood.
> She blushes harder trying to hide a grin. "
> "Yes, yes we suppose it does. We hope this doesn't effect your... image or opinion of us. We would greatly enjoy seeing more of you Anonymous. Whether that be a visit in Canterlot, or a visit in a dream."
> Did she just invite you to Canterlot?
" You know I always enjoy your company Luna. All I ask is to let me get some .... things... straightened out before we have another.. .. 'dance' " you air quote goofing a little with a cheesy smile.
90/?
>>22579308
>You don't know the rules of playing music on the street, but damn, what's bad in it?
>You place yourself on the bench near the artificial lake and start playing some slow music.
>Ponies are starting to stare at you, but they're still walking by.
>You decide to play some faster music
>This is the moment, when somepony has stopped to give you some money.
>Another ponies are starting to stop next to you, to listen your music.
>Yeah, you recovered your talent from years ago.
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v9oae5ClxaQ
>And it goes and goes.
>You feel yourself lost in your own music, as the time passes by.
>Suddenly somepony guard has poked you.
>"Hey, musical monkey, we're closing the park, It's already eleven o'clock!"
>Holy shit, you came here in the noon!.
>Taking the guitar case from the ground you find a lot of money in it.
>Yes, you can live with that.
>You get lost in thought again, as you walk towards your home.
14/?
>>22579323
And that's all from me today.
Damn, nearly 16000 characters written today. Hope that you'll enjoy it, and post your opinions
>>22579311
Sorry if I interrupted your posting, Keep going dude.
>>22579323
Sorry didn't mean to post while you are.
Sorry for the errors, I'm running late for work I have a little more I'll drop later and work on more when I can.
>>22577563
Idk, there is feedback and then there is pointless fangirl cockguzzling. These posts seem to trend towards the latter and carry about as much useful substance as a tween gushing over how great Justin Beiber is. The only thing missing is pointless asterisks encompassing your physical actions in life like it has some importance or relevance.
>>22576501
With that in mind, real feedback time I guess.
First off here >>22575447, everything in this entire conversation after this point feels forced. A relatively benign statement such as "I'm moving away" is not usually met with immediate and uncontrollable sobbing by the recipient of the message unless said person is mentally unstable. It feels extremely out of character for Applejack to react in such a fashion and spend the rest of the conversation stuttering.
Dialogue in general seems dry. Part of it can easily be rectified by adding some minimal amount of description between lines. The retelling of Twilight's sordid actions does not have the impact I assume you were going for. We get line after line of her drull monologue with only short quips into Anon's mindset. Applejack might as well be Microsoft Sam because she doesn't have any sort of emotion being shown. You can easily reread it with her being shitfaced drunk and laughing about the whole thing.
A lot of this can probably be summarized as "show don't tell". Build the scene because the reader can't see what you see.
Also, please stop with the "the Canterlot", "the Manehattan", and "the Equestria". This makes it read as if they are objects and not locations. Remove the "the" before each of these. This plus a few other mistakes lead me to believe you are not a native English speaker and you should consider looking for someone to edit/review your stuff before posting. Heck, simply running it through a spellchecker immediately before posting will fix a LOT of errors.
>>22579895
You have good points.
Parting from that, the plot seems good. Is like IRL when you are avoiding a problem so you won't have to feel sad but then the problem gets you and you don't feel sad, you feel like shit. It's like that but in this case taken to the extreme.
Hope no one minds if I drop in and write a bit. Decided to take this Anon in a bit of a different direction.
> Be Prince Anonymous.
> And you can scarcely believe the information set out before you.
> Yet here it was, clear as day.
> Pictures, of your wife...
> Your wife betraying you.
> One of your contacts said they had something juicy for you, but you had never expected...
"How much?"
> You keep your voice even.
> The lanky stallion shuffles slightly. They're always so easily intimidated.
> "Six-hundred bits. A thousand if you want the name of the stallion."
> Hmm. Quite the high offer.
> An unreasonable offer.
"I'll give you five-hundred for the pictures and the stallion's name."
> A more reasonable offer, you thought.
> The stallion's scoff suggested otherwise.
> "I know how much you don't want this to get out. My price remains the same."
> You hated when they knew they had a good hand.
> But maybe you could convince him otherwise.
> You swiveled your chair around, facing the gardens outside your window.
"And I know how much you enjoy staying out of prison, Featherweight."
"I'm being generous by offering you anything at all. And suddenly I'm in no mood to negotiate."
> "But your reputation-"
> You silence him with a gesture of your hand.
"My reputation will remain sterling, if not improved by this information. It's my wife who would suffer."
"I'll not ask again, Featherweight."
>>22580793
> You hear him shuffle from behind you.
> He then gives an exasperated sigh.
> "Fine. It was Private First-Class Flash Sentry, sir."
> You hear the photos drop onto the desk.
"Perfect. Simmer will compensate you on your way out."
> You gesture with your hand that he's free to go, and the door opens behind him.
"It's been a pleasure."
> He grunts, then turns to leave.
> The door closes.
> Your arm lashes out.
> A fifteen-thousand bit vase is the victim of your rage.
> A gift from a Gryphon delegation.
> It was almost three millennia old.
> Shattered on the floor.
> This was unfortunate.
> Very unfortunate.
> Much of what you had built was dependent on your relationship to Twilight.
> Your status as Prince was what had enabled you to build political capital.
> It enabled you to start building up a repertoire of secrets.
> Your livelihood depended on you maintaining that title, if this information got out...
> But it wouldn't. Because you could stop it.
> Because secrets were your profession. Usually they just weren't so close to your identity.
> And usually keeping them secret didn't hurt so badly.
>>22580805
> But most importantly, you had to stop this from happening again.
> Twilight wouldn't cheat with just anyone, she's not quite so stupid as to risk her reputation carelessly.
> This Flash Sentry must have some strong connection, something irreplaceable.
> So really, covering this up was more a matter of dealing with him at this point.
> Getting up, you walked over to a bookcase.
> Pulling back the "Tome of Cyclical Entropy," the wall begins to shift.
> Revealing your pride and joy.
> Behind the false door, row-upon-row of filing cabinets.
> Dirt on just about every person on this damn world.
> Knowing exactly where to go, you navigate the room flawlessly until you reach it.
> A cabinet labelled "E. Royal Guard - Canterlot Region."
> Pulling it open, you move to guard assignments to Ponyville.
> It doesn't take you long to find Flash, but you have almost nothing on him.
> So this would have to be indirect.
> The Captain of the Ponyville Guard was one "Gilded Light."
> Opening his file, a grin spread across your face.
> You did so love the game.
> Closing it, you return the rest and close the cabinet, taking it with you back to your office.
> You carefully navigate the shattered porcelain of the vase.
> As you take your seat in your comfortable chair, you pull out a quill from the desk.
> Some parchment from a cabinet.
> And you begin to machinate.
>>22580822
"Dear Captain Light."
> Best to begin formal.
"I am writing you regarding one Miss Shining Diamond."
> And hit hard, and fast.
"I am well acquainted with your improprieties with her."
> Appear civil.
"I hope dearly that you know the cost of infidelity in Saddle Arabia."
> But make clear the threat.
"If you wish to avoid a political catastrophe which could cost you your life..."
> The threat to him.
"And the possible costs to your family."
> The threat to what he holds dear.
"I have only one request."
> Make the task easy.
"You will order Private First Class Flash Sentry to stand guard alone at the Babbling Brook."
> And show how simple it will be for him to keep this all safe.
"His posting will be beside the Everfree."
> Leave no details out.
"Burn this letter after reading it. Tell no one, I will know if you do."
> And make clear your power.
"Further instructions will follow."
> And that was all it took.
> You'd have Flash out of the way in no time.
> And then you'd only have to deal with your unfaithful wife.
Where is fife?
>>22580832
That's it for now. Figure I'll test the waters with a new idea before plunging in, see how it suits me.
Also: Fife pls come back.
>>22580793
>>22580805
>>22580822
>>22580832
This is the green I was waiting for. A Prince Anonymous that has a nice web of power in his hands that he can make anyone to stand on their knees and suck his dick while he says: "ALL YOUR BASE NOW BELONG TO US, RESISTANCE IS FUTILE". But I hope he knows when to be like this, and when to be a good king.
>>22578851 #
(Sorry it's bugging me that I posted in the middle of another story)
> You don't even know what you were thinking.
> What just drove you to this situation with Luna?
> It didn't feel wrong by any means, in fact it felt like nothing you have experienced in quite some time, but how did it get to here?
> You have every intention to never see Twilight again...
> Your chest aches when her name makes it's way into your head again.
> But you don't know why, you truly never wanted to see her again.
> Luna displays an understanding smile masking saddened eyes.
> "Like we said Anonymous... We are sorry. You have been in our thoughts for so long. We tried to protect you in whatever way we could, significant or not. Whether it be from bad dreams and memoriesto distracting you from the pain you're feeling currently."She breaks eye contact.
> "We were being selfish just now. Not considering how soon such a... traumatic experience could still be affecting you. Putting our own.. wants.. before considering this. We want you to.... well..." she pauses looking to collect herself with a deep breath and articulate, the way she loves to. "...We can only hope you forgive us in our lack of... discretion. It's just... that, Anon.."
> She looks to the ground embarrassed, a pink hue crossing her cheeks. "Nevermind.. We apologize."
> She is hiding how flustered she is as some of her stary midnight mane falls over her face.
"It takes two to dance Luna" you say to her trying to lighten the mood.
> She blushes harder trying to hide a grin. "
> "Yes, yes we suppose it does. We hope this doesn't effect your... image or opinion of us. We would greatly enjoy seeing more of you Anonymous. Whether that be a visit in Canterlot, or a visit in a dream."
> Did she just invite you to Canterlot?
" You know I always enjoy your company Luna. All I ask is to let me get some ....things...straightened out before we have another.. .. 'dance' " you air quote goofing a little with a cheesy smile.
90/?
>>22581596
> This causes her to blush heavy as she looks down covering her smile with her hoof lightly giggling.
> You reach your hand to her and gently move some of the mane that fell infront of her face away.
> Your hand caresses the side of her face gently as your thumb crosses her cheek lightly.
> She responds, by sighing lightly turning her head into your hand again.
> You can't help but to at least hug her as you stand by the railing, both overlooking the party.
> She leans her head into your chest having to settle for the hug.
> Her eyes look up to you longingly clearly wishing for more.
> But all she can do is wear a sheepish smile and turn her head back into your chest resting it there nuzzling into it slightly.
91/?
>>22581633
Please sir, may I have more?
I am thoroughly enjoying your story and have your pastebin open at all times and anxiously anticipate updates to the story. Keep up the awesome work man!
Back for the evening. I'll try getting a small update out. Gonna be a long day tomorrow.
>>22581837
Thanks bruh, it keeps me wanting to write. I gotta update the pastebin it's a little behind.
>>22581968
Can't wait
>>22580884
Keep it coming dammit
>>22580884
This is pretty damn good so far, I hope you continue this.
>>22582103
Reading stories such as yours and Fifes' really make me want to start writing. Albeit there are guides to help beginners ease into writing, I would fear that I wouldn't have time to keep up with not only writing, but posting it as well. Anyway, just know that both Fife and yourself have a very interested anon interested with your stories.
>>22580884
Looks like I have a third great writefriend to follow these threads for. Sweet.
Also, enjoying all the new green in here.
Thank you, new writers.
And to >>22582263
Well, give it a shot and we'll see what people think. If it's not good, you can improve.
>>22582263
Plus it's usually interesting to how others portray or write characters. I say go for it Anonymous, if you really feel like writing then go ahead and write, it's exactly what got me into writefagging in the first place.
>>22582655
I suppose I could give it a shot, I'll think it through tonight and figure something to start with and go from there. As of right now though, I will just continue to sit back and enjoy the booze and stories.
>>22582704
I'm not so much worried as to let's say, come up with a story. More or less the way to word or express how I think it. If that makes sense, but as Fife stated it is worth a shot, and hell if it were to work out somewhat, then I would be one step closer to becoming legend such as those in this thread!
>>22580832
> Looking at yourself in the mirror, you carefully adjusted your tie to make sure it lined up perfectly.
> Appearances were important, after all.
> You had to make sure this event was memorable.
"Sapphire, the platinum cuff-links, please."
> "At once, my Prince."
"And the matching crown, as well."
> The blue-toned pony bowed, making an affirmative noise, before backing out of your room.
> Moving over to the window, you looked out over Canterlot proper.
> Your suite at the Castle was a thing of beauty.
> An amazing view of the city.
> While your wife lived in her castle in Ponyville, you stayed mostly in Canterlot.
> At the castle which still represented the heart of Equestrian government.
> Making regular trips out to the township, of course.
> It was a necessity. Ponyville was still a backwater. There was little in the way of political gain to be made there.
> You had carefully arranged political cover for your trip to Ponyville.
> Ordinarily, if there was a threat, you would have someone else take care of it.
> There was too much political risk in addressing a problem yourself.
> But this 'Flash Sentry' had made things personal.
> He had opted to not only risk Twilight's entire life, but yours.
> That was something that called for action.
> And you fully intended to deal with him yourself.
> It had been too long since you had gotten to enjoy any real fun, anyhow.
> While the game was still fun from afar, you missed the personal touch.
> But you required a solid alibi. Or your wife would know something was up.
> So you pulled a few strings.
> The door opens behind you.
> "Your cuff-links and crown, sir."
"Thank you, Sapphire."
>>22583095
> The train ride was luxurious, but it was what you were accustomed to.
> You spent the duration of it looking over plans for an extension to the Manehattan train network.
> Unlike your fellow Royals, who tended to delegate most of their labour, you preferred the personal touch.
> It was what had made you so beloved amongst the populace.
> Upon your initial arrival, you had been reviled; the ponies were a naturally suspicious lot.
> But you had struggled endlessly to make the inroads necessary to win the hearts of the people.
> In no small part by winning the heart of a princess.
> And it was that focus on the individual issues that had won you that reputation.
> That, combined with your ability to get what needed to be done finished.
> Your door opened, a servant bringing in a cup of coffee.
> "Your beverage, sir."
"Thank you, Collar. An incredibly prompt delivery, I must say."
> Even the stuffy old stallion becomes bashful at your comment.
> "You flatter me, sir."
> Of course you flattered him.
> Flattery got you everywhere with the average citizen.
> Made you seem humble, real. Something tangible.
> Where their princesses were their deities, you were their messiah.
> When the door closed, you returned to looking over the expansion.
> It was a good distraction from the struggles that would be ahead of you.
> Your purpose in Ponyville was ostensibly covered. You were opening a new orphanage this evening.
> 'Anonymous' Home for The Hopeful.' Funded by one Filthy Rich.
> One Filthy Rich with a lot of secrets.
> But you only hoped you didn't encounter Twilight this evening.
> You knew she would be in Ponyville, and likely know about your event.
> But you couldn't predict what your reaction would be to seeing her.
> You knew you had to keep your cool...
> But you must confess, it stung. Harshly.
> Hopefully she would wait until after Flash was dealt with.
>>22583113
> Upon disembarking your train, you almost immediately spotted Mayor Mare.
> And you also spot a veritable flood of the press.
> They hounded you everywhere. You were a bit of a celebrity, after all.
> Your guards move out to hold back the tide of press while you move towards the Mayor.
> You had won her innumerable political battles in exchange for information in the early days.
> It's why there was still a Mayor in this town when a Princess ruled it directly.
> Something otherwise illogical.
> As if there would ever be a 'Mayor of Canterlot,' for instance.
> You address her.
"Mayor Mare! It's such a pleasure."
> "My Prince! It's been too long since I've seen you personally!"
> You lift the small mare up into an embrace, and you hear the snapping of cameras behind you.
> Putting her down, you brush a lock of hair out of her face.
"Why, I was here not two weeks ago and saw neither hide nor hair of your beauty."
> She gets a little flustered.
> "Well, you could've dropped by City Hall! You know my door's always open for you!"
> It's always hard to tell if she's playing the game quite like you are.
> Or perhaps she's genuinely an admirer, like the rest.
> You preferred to believe the former. Made it easier to deal with.
"But I suppose we mustn't waste time with pleasantries. The sun's already falling and I have a ribbon to cut!"
> She laughs and swats you with a hoof.
> The mayor says to follow her, and you do, your guards moving with you.
> You look to your watch.
> Flash would be at his post now.
> Your mind wanders briefly as to whether this is the right course of action.
> When you look up, you notice you've fallen behind a bit from the Mayor, and pick up the pace.
> Always have to look busy.
> Because even if you spend every waking moment working for Equestria...
> If it doesn't look like it, then they won't think you are.
> And that's guaranteed to lose you the favour of the people.
>>22583128
"And thus, it is my pleasure to officially declare Anonymous' Home for the Hopeful open for business!"
> You bring down the giant scissors on the big red ribbon, slicing it in two.
> As you open the doors, a bunch of foals run into the building.
"And of course, to prove that this is a home fit for a prince, I'll be staying the night!"
> The thundering roar of hooves on the ground echo through the township.
> A rousing applause, merely for cutting a ribbon and giving them your presence.
> The foals were for show, of course. The orphanage wouldn't open until tomorrow.
> You had need of the building for tonight. Those foals would be put up at the local hotel for the evening.
> Looking at the crowd, your entourage begin to disperse them as you move into the building with the Mayor.
> "I can't tell you how much I appreciate this, Anonymous. Every time you stop by it seems a big boon for my career."
"Happy to help, Mayor. I'm sure you realize this helps me as much as it helps you."
> She chuckles, hiding her face behind her hoof.
> "Oh as if you need political help. Everyone loves you."
> You chuckle lightly.
"I do seem to have that effect on people. But I'm sure you need to get home, Mayor. I won't keep you."
> She bashfully kicks her hoof.
> "Oh, I always have time for you, My Prince. But I suppose we can carry on tomorrow."
> You move to escort her to the exit.
"I'll see you in the morning, then?"
> "You can bet on it!"
> You watch her until she's firmly out of sight, before closing the door.
> You turn to your Guard Captain, an imposing Gryphon.
"Talon, I want you to watch this door and the windows."
"No one comes in, no one looks in. If Twilight comes by, one of you stall and the other notify me."
"In no other circumstance am I to be disturbed."
> He snaps a sharp salute.
> "Yes, Sir!"
> Good.
> You remove your crown and wrist-cuffs, placing them on the table.
> You likewise remove your blazer, and place it over one of the dining chairs.
>>22583145
> You roll up your sleeves.
> Moving around the rear-portion of the orphanage, you head near the stairwell to the second floor.
> Behind the stairs is a door, leading down to the basement.
> Which you take.
> And once downstairs, you go through the trapdoor beside the icebox.
> In the sterile room there is a single occupant.
> Your prize for the night. Bound and gagged.
> Strapped to a table.
> Yes, you think you'll have fun tonight.
> You did miss the personal touch.
"Hello, Private First-Class."
>>22583205
The people requested moar, so I have supplied. But now I must rest.
Also
>Implying Flash and Anon aren't just having a tea party.
>>22583173
>People had said they wanted moar, so I have supplied moar. I don't intend to get into the grimdark explorations of what Flash and Anon get up to, but I figured this would give some more insight into this Anon.
Too bad.
>>22583260
You made King Anonymous as I always wanted to read him in a green.Well, in my mind he is Viggo Mortensen.
This is pretty good, I can see the way this is heading and I love it.
I hope Flash likes his tea.
>>22582853
Go for it man, I was in the same boat as you and I'm having a blast doing it now. I enjoy doing it and it makes me happy that others actually enjoy it.
>>22583260
I approve of this story direction. Please continue.But no more stories about my waifu cheating guys. I couldn't take another.
>>22584080
Since Fife and you stated that I should give it shot earlier, I've came up with something and have been writing. As I stated earlier I have never written a story ever, so pointers or criticism is appreciated either way. I could post if you and others are interested?
>>22584275
doitfaggot
>>22584275
Post m8.
>>22584519
>>22584545
Alright well here goes..
>"A'hm havin a hard time taking in what you just said sugarcube." Aj is visibly distraught, and even looks as if though she will hurl at any second.
>"Darling, you truly don't think there may have been a misunderstanding do you. That could have been anypony you walked in on.."
>"Rarity, I wish it was but..." You cut short on your sentence. You're having a hard enough time as it is trying to explain what you witnessed. Even more so just dealing with the flow of emotions being bottled up inside you as you try to remain calm and explain what happened. It doesn't help in the slightest either that you are bruised and bloody after getting into one hell of a fight after the event.
~Flashback to four hours ago~
>You are Anon, and today will be one helluva day.
>You made sure to pay more attention to your person today and dress more appropriately than what you usually do.
>"Why in the hell would you do such a thing in the first place you ask? Well for starters, it is your anniversary you long-legged assha-"
>Your internal monologue is interrupted when you hear a loud knock downstairs.
>At least you are more hostile to yourself than to the ponies here in Equestria you think. Quite the experience being around them the past few years, you really did have a soft spot in your heart for them. Especially after your arrival and them seeing that you would be no threat. Even though you are pretty fit even in pony eyes. They still saw through you and that you would mean no harm to them.
>Hell you'd even go as far to say that practically every pony loves your presence here. As you think all of this you're already making your way to the front door, lost in thought. All until you hear a familiar voice.
>The voice is muffled until you get just a little closer and pick up on some of the words.
>"Saw...earlier...he's here."
>You stop at the corner and linger for a second trying to listen and pick up as to whom it might be.
>"Miss, I'm going to state this again, The Prince is currently not accepting visitors at this time" You can clearly make out Cliffslider's voice. This doesn't surprise you, mostly due to the fact that guarding the front door is his job here in the castle.
>"Awww come on, please, just for a second? He promised me he was going to let me ask him more questions!" This mare, her voice is very familiar, where have you heard..."Oh no.." you state with a little bit of waiver in your voice.
>That voice belongs to none other than Lyra Heartstrings. Ever since you arrived into Equestria; of all the other ponies, she has always had a rather..extraordinary fascination with you. Surprisingly she knew quite a bit about humans and from what you understand you are the first human ever, here in Equestria. So how she knows all this information about humans in the first place makes you even more uncomfortable to the fact.
>Albeit she does mean well, but still...what the fuck.
>"Please, please, please!"
>"I'm closing the door now, buh bye."
>"You can't close a door in a mares' face, thats very..." She was cut off before she could even finish her sentence as the door slammed shut in her face.
>"Damn maybe she's right, I could never do such a thing" Cliffsider states as he turns around, "In any other case though, You are an exception Miss Heartstrings."
>You take that as your cue and head on around the corner from where you were snooping.
>"How many times does that make this week Cliff? Eleven, twelve?"
>"Twenty-six sir."
>"Holy shit! She is persistent!" you state, raising a small laugh from Cliff.
>"Well today is the big day Cliff." This raised an eyebrow from the light gray pony before you.
>"My memory fails me at this time sir, and what might today be?"
>"The same day I stated that you quit calling me sir, I'm mid twenties Cliff, damn." you state flatly. Again bringing a small chuckle from Cliff.
>"Force of habit, and ah but of course, the day of yours and Princess Twilights' marriage." He states as he seemed to bring up old memories within himself and forms a warming smile.
>"Mhmm, I have a nice spot picked out on the hill east side here of Ponyville. Got lanterns and a little table set up for a little dinner. Nothing to fancy, but enough to show her that two years of her experiments and testing haven't changed how much I love her."
>"That's a good thing to hear sir." A smile wide on his face. "If you need me to arrange or do anything to help this dinner go smoothly I will gladly help." He states.
>"You know, come to think about it...."
And that is all I have written so far, not much up to this point but some basic information and some background on a few ponies I plan to use. That is if I actually do plan on continuing that is..
>>22584687
Well, the plot seems good so far.
You need to work on the fomat of the green. people might get confused with who is speaking at the moment.
For example:
>"This is Sparklebutt talking"
"This is anon talking"
>>22584860
Alright I will keep that in mind, thanks. Honestly, I'm not even going to lie, I was enjoying writing what little bit I did. I definitely have more planned to write, my problem is wording it to the way I think it out, and finding the vocabulary to fit whomever it may be talking at the time. All in all I appreciate your input and feedback on this man! Thanks!
Sorry guys, no update tonight. Probably tomorrow. Should have at least two or three posts worth of green.In the mean-time, read up on waterboarding. You'll be seeing some here soon.
G'night. Stay safe all.
>>22585374
Good night, Fife, sleep well.
I hope you get to remove kebab in your dreams.
>>22579895
Thanks man, I really appreciate your feedback.
As I said before, English is not my native language so I'm looking forward to see where I'm making mistakes:^)
Unfortunately I don't have any person to edit my green, so I think I'm going to give spellchecker a chance.
>>22580351
Thanks m8
I will try to leave some green tonight
Bump b4 bed.
Good night thread. Don't die.
>>22585788
It won't.
Don't worry
>>22583145
His guards are griffons? fucking sweet
>>22579272
>'poor immigrant' prince Anonymous.
That's glorious kek.
>You didn't take any money from home, because all of it are currently in Twilight's house.
Seems legit.
>'Closest' meh, Apparently the shop is placed on the edge of the town.
Classic cliche!
>"Hello there, my big friend. What can I help you?"
Should be "How can I..."
Not What.
>>22579289
I like desciption of the shop.
>"I have looked through your instrument... This is not our world's device..."
No shit, Sherloc!Kek!
>>22579308
>"So I decided to throw some my solutions into it"
Better would be "... some of mine solutions..."
>But only the stupid one would decline.
The way of describing Anons thought is flawless.
You are a very decent human Mr. Runaway.
>Hey! It's not fair! You didn't make that much mistakes!
Ha!
>As you cross the door frame, you feel the compassion for him.
>He is so lonely...
Then acknowlege him closer nigga!
>>22579323
>You don't know the rules of playing music on the street, but damn, what's bad in it?
I song once in old town. Better payment per hour than in my regular job.
>"Hey, musical monkey, we're closing the park, It's already eleven o'clock!"
>musical monkey
He is the prince monkey for you!
>>22579895
You are right, but I'm this cheering feedbacker, because I'm not really deep into the english.
>>22582655
>If it's not good, you can improve.
Sacred words.
>>22585668
MORE!
Done with work, gonna try to put up something before bed.
>>22580884
well, at least i don't have to feel bad for anon for a change. what a piece of shit.
I don't like this green, but clearly you have your fans here, so rock on wit yo bad self.
>>22580793
> Pictures, of your wife...
I need pictures of ponies!
>Featherweight is a badass.
I already like your setting.
>>22580805
> "Fine. It was Private First-Class Flash Sentry, sir."
Oh boy.
I like this vase thing.
Pretty awesome descripted!
He seems me... Vetinari.
>>22580822
> And you begin to machinate.
Yesss...
>>22580832
He is! He is Vetinari!
>>22583095
> While your wife lived in her castle in Ponyville, you stayed mostly in Canterlot.
That's why she did that jackass!
Personal case cliche!
>>22583113
>personal touch?
He is a really good leader, then.
> One Filthy Rich with a lot of secrets.
Your seeting is deeper that I expected.
Way of Anons thinking is stunning.
>>22583128
> You had won her innumerable political battles in exchange for information in the early days.
> It's why there was still a Mayor in this town when a Princess ruled it directly.
WOW!
That was awesome! You are awesome!
>ribbon to cut!
You sir, write good not only his thoughts but also his words.
> Always have to look busy.
> Because even if you spend every waking moment working for Equestria...
> If it doesn't look like it, then they won't think you are.
You are wise guy!
>>22583145
>"And of course, to prove that this is a home fit for a prince, I'll be staying the night!"
Pretty awesome prince.
> You move to escort her to the exit.
Personal care, like in the Godfather.
>>22583205
Here it comes!
>>22583260
Please, do more.
Gib me your pastebin. I want to devour your pasta.
>>22586661
Well, to some degree my Anon is a bit of a villain, he's not designed to be the beloved perfect protagonist (Unless, like me, you love the Frank Underwood type). I've always found villains more interesting anyhow, both to read about and to write.
Although that's not to say he's all bad, as you'll see if you keep reading.
I also felt this sort of Anon gave me the opportunity to build a world where Twilight was a bit more justified, and it wasn't sort of a blindside.
And thank you for all the nice words other friends. I'll pick it up after work today.
>>22586779
Oh, and http://pastebin.com/u/LokiLorien is my pastebin. I only have one other story at the moment, over in the war thread. I only started writing earlier this week.
>>22587524
>http://pastebin.com/u/LokiLorien
2nd April and 1300 lines already?
Oh boy.
>>22586661
He isn't a great person, but he IS a great Prince and even a better politician.
>>22588266
Agreed. He is a villain. But one that seems to be leashed and beholden to the state itself. A monster with a set of ideals.
>>22586460
>>22586779
Fapman you stupid faggot
>>22588546
I would not go as far as to say villian, neutral or anti-hero fit him better, since he does great things for those ponies but the means to those ends are somewhat wrong when we talk about morals, of course, no one has to know that. He is like a Templar.
>>22588560
You silly paranoid boy!
It was regular Anonymous!
See?
>>22586460
Atleast put your trip back on.
>>22589186
Nah.
Some random faggots (and maybe some decent too) are bitching about this.
I will stay as... no one.
>>22589220
At least 'lrn 2 grmmr' before you start wrecking my brain with your nightmarish pile of smouldering and raped syntax.
>>22589220
I can't filter you if you don't.
>>22589440
>>22589461
And that why you requested...
Seems legit.
I'm trying bro.
I even pretend to write.But the more I do, the more I see how much work still is before me.
Also. Sorry for everything.
>>22589571
Your grammar has really improved Faps.
Don't worry about it.
more bumps
>tfw I imagine what it would feel like to fall so deeply in love with Twilight, marry her, kiss every every day, trust her unconditionally...
>and then one day you see her cute flank jiggle as another stallion ruts her
>tfw i can imagine plunging equestria in eternal night after that.
>tfw the only thing that would stop me would be luna asking me out cause we're both damaged.
>>22592418
Oddly, I think I'd be ok with that.
Got a one shot.
>Be anon
>Come home after a long day of apple bucking at Sweet Apple Acres
>Hear noises coming from inside your and Twilight's room
>As you approach you hear her yell "FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUCK yes" as she bites her pillow.
>You only hear the FFFFUUU part before you burst into the room, hoping she didn't hurt herself with a failed experiment.
>Find Flash Sentry rutting her flank, its jiggling making you extremely jealous.
"WHAT THE FUCK???"
>"A-Anon, it isn't what it looks like, I-I'm"
"Then WHAT THE FUCK does it look like???"
>"I-I was um...ch-choking and needed...the himlich?" She says, her voice getting higher and higher.
You can see tears beginning to stream down her face.
>"Anon I-I'm...so"
"Well, I'm just glad to hear you're alright."
>"I-wait what?"
"From choking, I'm glad you're ok. Thanks, Shining."
>"Uh...yeah dude, happy to be of service."
>He then proceeds to dismount, quickly sheathing himself before he trots out the door.
>You turn to your wide eyed wife, as she stares at you with a blank expression.
"I love you baby, thank Celestia you're safe."
>"I-I love you too baby!" she squees as she puts her hooves around your neck.
>"We should um...c-celebrate."
"Sounds good to me."
>You then proceed to rut the shit out of Twilight, though you notice she's far more wet than usual.
"You must've missed me." you say slyly."
>"You know baby," she giggles.
>After a good 10 minutes of rutting you both lie on your backs, panting.
>She turns to your, holds you close and sighs contently.
>"I love my life..."
>You kiss her on the lips once more, and you see a soft blush form on her cheeks.
>"And I love you, Anon."
>And the two of you fall asleep in each others arms.
>You don't know what you would've done if you lost her. You hug her tighter, happy she's safe.
What do you guys think? Hope it was okay.
>>22592763
This overkek, holy shit.
I can't stop laughingPretty gud.
>>22592763
Die.
>>22593454
>mfw see this precious opinion
>>22581633
[Rewind several minutes]
> You are Big Mac
> And you are now trying to dance with Pinkie between the line of sight of Twilight and the second tier where your brother Anon and Luna are.
> You aren't much of a dancer at all, but Pinkie is having a ball now that somepony is entertaining her.
> "Shake it Big Mac!" Pinkie energetically yells as she shakes her flank.
> You smile uncomfortably as you take a quick glance to the second tier spotting Anon talking with Luna.
> Your eyes widen a little as you control your panic doing your best to block this line of sight, while keeping the bouncing Pinkie under control.
> Luckily for you Twilight doesn't seem to interested in looking around as she faces the bar looking down into her almost empty drink again.
> Pinkie is tiring you out, you have no idea how she never runs out of steam.
> I...is she doing the robot?
> You watch her as she rears up on her hind legs keeping a straight face, moving her fore legs robotically.
> Pinkie says in a robotic voice, " Do. The. Robot. With. Me. Big. Mac."
"Nnope... " you say dryly watching her do her thing.
> She pushes you a little, " You're no fun!" She says in her Pinkie scream.
" Nnope." You turn back to the bar since Twilight doesn't seem interested in moving much as she nurses a drink.
> Standing next to her, you order another round of drinks and slide her one.
> She smiles weakly at you, " Thank you Big Mac."
" Eeyup" you say forcing a smile.
> It's strange standing next to her now.
> She honestly looks miserable and you want to feel bad for her but you find it difficult...
> She devastated your best friend through one of the worst betrayals you can imagine.
> A humiliating discovery of infidelity in the act.
> You can't begin to imagine...
> You catch yourself staring at her as you psychologically struggle between sympathy and disgust.
92/?
>>22593602
So pic related is how Big Mac feels about being around the little purple slut.
>>22593602
Oh how I want Twilight to see Luna and Anon together dancing.
Oh how I want her to jump to conglusions and in blurred by jealous rage confront them, telling her to get off her husband.
And Anon yells at her to stop because they aren't going to do anything until the divorce is over.
Oh how I want it to seek in that he's falling for another mare.
Considering how horny mares are in the wild, and how they pretty much fuck as many stallions as possible, even farmers apparently, I can't imagine being married to Twilight or any other mare and not be paranoid that something's going on. Especially when they're in estrus and you're away...yikes. They're basically the whores of the animal kingdom.
>>22593602
Based Mac.
Pg9 bump.
Sorry for the delay. I wrote something out, then re wrote something out. Now I'm re re writing it. I want it to be gud.
>>22595442
No, that's dolphins.
>>22597126
No, dolphines are the rapists. A horse is a whorse of course of course. Only females can be whores anyway and I'm fairly certain dolphine-human rape is exclusively due to male dolphines. Patriarchal scum.
>>22597200
It's a little of both actually. They're both rapists and whores. And actually so are mares. Mares have been known to "rape" human males actually, when a dumb ass human gets behind a mare when she's in estrus in a narrow space. Mare have been known to back up their rump and basically reverse hump, which can actually be quite dangerous. Point is, mares and dolphines are fuckin whores both.
Pic related, it's an accurate depiction of a horse in heat.
Forgive me a little bit of edginess.
>>22583205
> A voice draws you from your slumber.
> Cracking open your eyes takes considerable effort.
> And the intense light from the top of the stairs blinds you.
> You move a hand to cover your eyes, and avert your gaze.
> "My Prince, it's six-thirty."
> You groan loudly.
> You should have stopped earlier last night.
> But he kept on going.
> So you had to.
> Your bones feel rusty as you move up into a sitting position.
> Snaps and crackles all the way.
> Your eyes finally adjusting, you can see your Guard Captain at the top of the stairs in the light.
"Thank you, Talon."
> He makes an affirmative noise, turning to leave.
> The small door closes, returning you to the relative darkness of the cellar.
> Small, magic-powered lamps are around the room, but they provide little light.
> Grime cakes your once immaculate white dress shirt and vest.
> Pulling yourself up from the floor, you nearly slip.
> Seems you passed out in a wet spot, a terrible shame.
> Your whole body moves slowly, aching from sleeping on a stone floor.
> Looking down at yourself, long red splotches stain your clothes.
> Beyond any hope of cleaning, you supposed.
> Slowly, your hand moves to the buttons of your vest, and you discard it.
> Then your dress shirt.
> But the pants stay.
>>22597407
> You stand tall, stretching to shake off the stiffness in your joints.
> Your immaculate form glistening in the wetness.
> Seems the stains weren't limited to your clothes.
> Your gaze draws over to a table on the far side of the room, holding what you needed.
> It was the only immaculate portion of the room, you had required that it remain so.
> You move over, slowly, to the table, and hear something snap under your foot.
> A long, white, yet thin stick.
> Reminded you of a chicken wing from back home, if it was oversized.
> Ignoring it, you continue to the desk, and pull yourself up on it.
> You sit beside the object of your affection, your back against the wall.
> A solid oak box, with Twilight's cutie mark emblem emblazoned on the lock.
> Reaching down into your pants pocket, you withdrew a small key.
> And slid it slowly into the box.
> And as you pulled it back, it revealed perhaps your greatest treasure.
> One of the only things you got to keep when you arrived.
> Six cigars, Cubans.
> Originally of twelve.
> It was a terrible shame this world didn't have Tobacco.
> Or at least some pony equivalent of Cuba, to reminisce at.
> In the second compartment, your lighter.
> Specially engraved, although you had no idea what the engraving meant.
> You had forgotten a lot of your previous life, but you remembered what these were.
> Flicking the lighter on, you put the cigar in your mouth.
> You light the tip, and inhale deeply.
>>22597425
> The hot feeling of smoke in your lungs makes you feel alive.
> After holding it in for a second, you exhale slowly.
> Letting the fire roll out of you.
> And as it finishes...
> You begin to speak.
"You know, Flash, I detest murder."
> The room remains completely silent, save your breath.
> You take another long drag from the cigar.
"It's terribly ineffective. Leaves too many holes to cover up."
> You look at the state of the room before you.
"Too much mess to clean."
> Another drag.
"But it's not all about the practicality. There's a personal reason."
> The cigar is draining quickly, and you feel strength returning to your limbs.
> Your impressive physique flexes, shaking away the stiffness.
> The room is rapidly filling with smoke.
"I don't like to end a life. I know it's not who I was before I came here."
> Standing back up with the cigar, you approach the table where Flash was initially bound.
> It's vacant now.
> It's occupant had gone on quite an adventure.
> Your fingers run along the shoddy wood.
> It wasn't well built, but it didn't need to be.
> It just needed to hold him still 'till you got here.
"It's why I'm smoking now. Because I feel like..."
> You pause, looking for an apropros thing to say.
"If I'm going to take away something from you that is so precious, I should lose something too."
>>22597441
> You clenched the Cigar end between your teeth, holding it there to free up your hands.
> You picked up your vest from the floor, and laid it out nicely on the table.
"Something from myself before I became this."
> The cigar is nearly done.
> You once again withdraw it to your hand, as you meander over to the lump in the corner.
> It's not moving.
> And it's certainly not the same colour it started out as.
"I'm not sure what I'll do when I run out."
> You kneel down, observing the lump.
> There was little in the way of defining characteristics left.
"But I do hope you understand, I didn't choose to do this lightly."
> You rub out the nub of the cigar on the ruined corpse.
> No reaction.
> Not even a twitch.
> Your work was truly done.
> Moving back up, you gather up your vest and shirt.
> You would leave the box for another to collect.
> You couldn't risk sullying it further.
> You then turn around, and look toward the door.
> You pause for a moment.
"I'm sorry it had to be this way. You could have avoided this."
> You begin to move.
"But you chose a fight you couldn't possibly win."
> You're at the exit quickly.
> You look back one last time.
> And give a little salute.
"Rest in peace, Private."
>>22597454
> Climbing the stairs back up to the main room, you see Talon waiting for you.
> Along with two of his subordinate Gryphons.
> You hold out your clothes for one of the subordinates to take, which they do.
"Burn them, there's a fireplace in the dining hall of the building."
> He looks briefly to Talon, who gestures for him to go.
> The Gryphon takes off quickly.
"I'll be taking a shower. I expect that room to be collapsed before I finish."
> Talon snaps a sharp salute.
> "It will be done, My Prince. A new suit is in the bathroom."
> He gestures to a specific door in the hallway.
> A smile spreads across your face.
"Thank you, I can't imagine what I'd do without you."
> You move into the bathroom, and turn on the shower.
> Taking off your pants and undergarments, you jump in immediately.
> The water is like ice, but it feels like sweet relief.
> The water flowing off you is tinged crimson.
> Taking some of the soap, you begin to lather yourself.
> This was reckless, you knew.
> Coming here in person, you mean.
> But sometimes principle overwhelmed logic.
> And under the cold water, you knew you would be fine.
> Your sins were washing right down the drain.
> But as you look at the drain, you notice not all of it goes down so well.
> A bright orange feather, tinged red.
> Must've stuck to you with the caked on grime.
> Picking it up, the red drains from it under the water.
> As you turn off the water, you carry the feather with you out of the shower.
> Your put on your shirt and new pair of of pants.
> Your new vest.
> And your blazer, from last night, with the cuff-links.
> You slide the feather into one of the inside pockets of the blazer.
> And lastly, you put on your crown.
> You had returned from the darkness.
> And there was only one problem left on your mind.
> Your wife.
>>22597472
And that's it for this installment. As ever, I love feedback.
I feel like I might've went a little too dark here, but it felt appropriate given the character and the circumstance.
>>22597522
Loving it so far, moar..
>>22597522
As is, loving the pacing, Prince MachiavellAnon has show some interesting character quirks. And seems to show, that even when if he is an opportunistic bastard he had at least some care for his unfaithful wife and was genuinely hurt by her betrayal.
>>22598022
If I were in his shoes, I'd make her pay for what she did behind closed doors, while preserving the marriage for the public at large's benefit.
But that's just me.
>tfw I reading adulterous Twilight stories and always want that Twalot will pay and at the same time I hope that through betrayal she truly loves Anon.
>>22598209
He seems to be doing that more or less. Its just he is cleaning house before confrontation.
>>22598295
We all know that feel.
Except those who were actually cheated on.
Maybe it makes 'em more wise to know the feel.
Or less, as feelings of jealousy and betrayal cloud their mind.
I don't fuckin' know and that's what scares me....
Part of me thinks that if Twilight cheated on me I'd immediately hook up with moonbutt or another broken-ass faithful as fuck mare and part of me thinks I'd be too in fuckin love with Twilight I'd either try to work it out or fucking kill all life upon the planet's surface. I'm not sure which is true for me.
>>22599354
I can say as an anon who got cheated on, that it fuckin' sucks, and yeah, at least in my case, I did hope she did still love me on some level, even after it all went down. I still walked the fuck away though. Even though it really hurt.
Sorry everyone. My brother disconnected my computer while I was gone to do some of his own stuff, and managed to delete my unsaved documents.
So I've lost my current update for the story.
>>22599727
>tfw
>>22592763
when you brought up the heimlich i fully expected she was gonna try to convince anon that's how it works for pones.
followup scene is anon fucking a pone at a fancy restaurant cause she was choking.
>>22597248
fucking animu
>>22599727
a) he knows not what he does
b) how did he manage that? are you using something with zero autosave feature?
>>22599959
He just turned it off and disconnected it.
And yes, no autosave feature.
>>22600355
Grab Notepad ++.
>>22589571
Well, it doesn't hurt to read what you say anymore.
Just drop the "..." A's if you're trying to think of the right word and it'll flow better.
Also, we say 'Kek' like so, with no punctuation.
>>22599727
And then you murdered him, right?
>>22597472
You write well but this has too much edge for me
>>22601015
I on the other hand appreciate it. I feel as though my story is edgier honestly.
>>22601104
Well I like both stories but his is edgier. It has gruesome torture and cold, calculated murder. It may only be referred to after it happened but it still happened. Yours is miserable and depressing but nothing like this.
>>22601015
> Implying showing the scene wouldn't have been edgier.
It's going to be the edgiest part of the story, by far. I purposefully avoided the actual scene because I knew it would be meaningless edge, and tried to avoid the sort of rage-edge that would've made it worse, instead opting for a sort of resigned will.
It's a tricky rope, developing a character with this sort of personality without being needlessly dark. Apologies it has strayed too far for you.
>>22597522
This was dark, not edgy, and I love this even more because of it. Even the best men have to put their hands in the gutter to save others, he is doing this for Twilight, and that feather, will be a good gift.
>Long live the king.
>>22601104
Also this.
But your green isn't edgy either, I mean it's not like:
>Anon pulled out his shotgun and started firing.
>Spaghetti and blood filled the room as the masacre ended.
Your Anon fights because he has to. It's for defence not meaningless violence.
>>22601193
Just keep going brother.
>>22601272
>>22601187
Aight aight, I'm gonna try retyping this shit up.
Gonna get Notepad++ real quick though...
>>22601193
Not him, its not my cup of tea, but I can say its well written, or at least up to where I read it. Keep up the good work.
>>22601272
This Anon is the prince his people need him to be.
>>22599354
>Except those who were actually cheated on.
long ago i was cheated on by my GF of 3 years (who i was certain was the one) and i still get that feel. that said, in practical terms i think i'd rather found out she never gave a shit, cause i wouldn't have to feel like i lost anything and wouldn't have to struggle over whether to cut it off or try to salvage. but i suspect the common feel is hoping she seems incredibly distraught, suggesting it really was a stupid one time thing, you can get back together and she'll spend the rest of her life making it up to you. not realistic or practical, but i think that's the common dream.
>>22597472
> You're sitting before the fireplace of the orphanage.
> Watching the flame waver back and forth.
> Your foot tapping on the floor.
> Now the real battle began.
> You were entirely unsure how precisely you were going to handle the situation with Twilight.
> And that disturbed you.
> You never left things to chance.
> The dim sizzle of what was once an incredibly expensive suit smouldered in the fireplace.
> The ashes would need to be removed as well.
> But you had no viable solution to the problem presented to you.
> Divorce would crush everything you have worked so hard to achieve.
> And if you challenged her on her affair, it would reveal your complicity in Flash's disappearance.
> While you had plenty of material to control Twilight's silence with...
> Experience has taught you that princesses are volatile, and difficult to manage with your trade.
> You look away from the flames, your eyes closing.
> None of the scheming mattered.
> You knew you couldn't bring yourself to control her.
> While the rational side of your mind said to play her...
> You knew you couldn't.
> You rose up, and moved over to the window.
> You couldn't sit still.
> There was so much at stake.
> Your father had always said 'Great men know their strengths.'
> 'The Greatest men know their weaknesses.'
> You couldn't even remember the man.
> But you remembered the phrase.
> She was your Achilles' Heel, your one weakness.
> What an irony.
> What is a man to do when his weakness turns on him itself?
> Twilight was invulnerable, to most of the populace.
> You had made sure of that.
> Because...
> Because you loved her.
>>22602265
> Which was tainted now, forever.
> Every time you saw her face you would remember those pictures.
> How in the hell could you ever be intimate again.
> She would know something was up, immediately.
> You prided yourself on your ability to put up a face to match any occasion.
> And yet she could always tell when you were out of sorts.
> And always find a way to cheer you up.
> Your hand runs up through your hair, and you find it still damp.
> Hell, you doubt you can keep your mask on just speaking with her.
> A circumstance which was rapidly approaching.
> A subtle rage brewed in you.
> The rage of uncertainty.
> You withdraw your key from your pocket, and run your thumb along it's grooves.
> For now, you would have to keep it under wraps.
> At least until Flash was long forgotten.
> For all you know, she might tell you about it.
> Beg for forgiveness, the whole nine.
> That would complicate things even further, it occurred to you.
> But had she intended to do that, she would've been at the train station.
> So you supposed guilt was likely what she was feeling.
> The grooves of the key are wearing a cut into your thumb.
> And as a product of that, an unwillingness to approach you.
> It was the most logical explanation of how you managed to evade seeing her all night.
> You were prepared with a whole song and dance to avoid her if she showed.
> When you had a plan, you could do anything.
> You just boiled down your action to the steps.
> It was how you dealt with stress, ignore the surrounding context.
> Focus on what you need to do.
> But what needed to be done stung.
>>22602298
> You knew the easiest solution to your problem.
> Blueblood had mentioned it repeatedly over the course of your time in Canterlot.
> How it is that he remains a permanent Prince without a Princess or a pair of wings.
> His dearly departed.
> How easy it would be.
> Your mind immediately conjures the full plan.
> A poisoned chalice, with Baktic Acid.
> Uniquely found in the Falstad Republic, a Minotaur country.
> Invite the ambassador back, as an act of good will.
> Your thumb stopped running along the key.
> Political tensions already festered between the nations.
> Twilight had already spoken down to an ambassador.
> An assassination would be expected.
> Your foot stops tapping.
> There's a knock at the door, and your guards answer it.
> You could mourn Twi to win their hearts...
> And when the war inevitably started up
> Lead battles to win their minds.
> You can see yourself, standing in the field, donning Equestrian armor.
> Commanding the ponies in battle.
> And in doing so uniting Equestria...
> And destroying one of its enemies.
> And becoming more beloved than ever before for leading despite your hardship.
> The familiar voice of Mayor Mare at the door.
> It would be so easy to accomplish.
> You knew you could best the Republic.
> And it would help Equestria.
> Your heartbeat slows.
> The sound of hoofsteps entering the orphanage.
> The plan gives you comfort, a feeling of familiarity.
> An ability to detach yourself from reality.
> But you know it to be a false confidence.
> The plan failed to account for you.
> And your weakness.
> When the sound of steps reaches the entrance to your room, you turn.
> A friendly smile on your face.
> Not a sign of stress upon you.
"Mayor! I hope you slept well!"
> And the game begins anew.
>>22602331
>Anon is not the monster he could be.
This is something that makes me happy on the inside.
>>22602492
you are not alone there
>>22602331do you have anything more for RDA anon?
>>22602829
I do, but I'm putting off on posting it for a lil' bit.
Ten's story and it's subsidiaries has consumed that thread, so I figure I'll update during the slow periods (read: Mornings) so it doesn't get washed up in a tide of green, or distracting from theirs.
> That bad feel posting a story when others are in the middle of dumping theirs.
>>22602492
Not me.
>>22602331
This is what I love about a monster of this sorts. He is being a fusion between Batman and Sherlock Holmes right now and this plan can really work, but he won't do it, because he still loves her wife.
Bump
Is Fife kill?
Wrote something up. Just gotta clean it up.
Also bump.
>>22604178
Niet, read the thread.
>>22604178
Nah, I just don't really need to post much. Not providing stories in here right now, so no need to comment save for the image here and there.Even if I still have yet to receive a microwave.
>>22604178
Alright, just for you though, I'll give you a taste of green.
I just still don't want to really commit to anything until tomorrow evening/Monday, where I can get another good dump of stuff going.
>>22557144
>You are Anonymous, and you're doing your best to keep your fury in check.
>The tale Rainbow had just spun for you, had you feeling rather...conflicted.
>You would never think of her as a liar, but the situation she'd presented seemed perfectly believable.
>Her reaction to it as well was something that also managed to put you into the state of mind that drove her point home.
>Like when she said Thunderlane's name the first time.
>She about choked.
>Carrying on, little visual cues were further making her story seem like a perfect recollection of the day's events.
>By the time she reached the end, you'd already gone and made up your mind on a number of subjects.
>Though sadly, one major conflict still had yet to be resolved.
>That being your inability to decide on if you were going to have Thunderlane arrested, or do it yourself.
>Thinking on it as she begins to lose her composure, you ask her an important question.
"Tell me, what does Thunderlane look like again?"
>Your mind is at least partway made up.
>He'll get arrested and put in a place that you yourself decide on.
>Gilda...she'll get hers later.
>>22605238
>For now you'd content yourself with taking him yourself.
>"H-he's got a black coat a-and a whitish-blue mane..."
>She's now starting to cry.
>"I-I don't g-get why he'd t-try to do that..."
>Standing up, you move to her and pull her into your arms.
>She sobs into your chest and you can't help but feel your rage cool into something familiar.
"Shhhhh," you shush her, rubbing her back and running your fingers through her mane.
>Lifting her up, you carry her back into your room and lay her down on the bed.
>She calms down rather quickly due to your ministrations, her breathing returning to a normal rate.
"Go to sleep Dashie. I can see that you're still tired."
>She doesn't protest vocally, but you can see she's uncomfortable.
>You also knew that she was tired, even just from the signs she exhibited. Though, it was also something she'd implied as she'd stayed up so late waiting for you.
>These ponies didn't function like you did when it came to needing to eat or sleep.
>Thinking up a solution though, you came to one that still sat a little uncomfortably with you, but you'd get over it.
"Hold on, maybe this'll help." you tell her, as you pull a shirt out of your dresser.
>"What's that for?" she asks, sniffling a little.
>>22605288
>You don't respond as you turn around, setting it over her head and pulling it down.
>Helping her forelegs through the sleeves, she hugs the cloth close to her body.
>Not a word is said by either of you in this situation, but she takes a deep whiff of your scent still embedded in the fabric and visibly calms down further.
>Bringing your hands up to her face, you kiss her on the tip of her muzzle and lay her back down.
>She closes her eyes and buries her face in your pillow, breathing deeply.
>Within moments she's asleep.
>She was almost like you in that regard...
>Save for the beautiful multi-hued hair.
>The light but defined features of her almost-human face.
>Her lovely scent that reminded you of a fresh spring morning.
>Yanking your eyes away, you let the fire inside take control again.
>These ponies really were so close, and yet so far from humans.
>Some were closer than others though.
>>22605307
>There were days where you'd even dreamt that those like Dash or...Twilight were people like yourself.
>'No. You have justice to deal out. Think of your fantasies later. We must find our allies for now.'
"Yes..." you breath to yourself.
>Time to get a few guards together. They'd know what the target of your mind looked like.
>They could also help set up a lovely room for you to play with him.
>It needed be more than a cell.
>He'd be held accountable for his crimes.
>And you wouldn't do any permanent damage.
>Not on the surface at least.
>>22605323
That's it for tonight, quick update.
I'll continue tomorrow evening.
Do you guys want to see torture as it happens,or should I skip in a similar fashion as the other lovely writepal?
>>22605365
>option to just tell the guard and have him arrested
>nope gonna get some people and torture him
Getting kinda edgy now, so I'd say skip it.
>>22605395
this
>>22605323
>as a Prince, Anon is a recognized authority figure
>tortures Thunderlane, but leaves no marks thinking it'll keep him from being connected to the act
>Thunderlane is turned over to Guard
>squeals like a stuck pig about what Anon did
>Anon thinks he's in the clear since no physical evidence is left and its just he said/she said
>doesn't take into account mind/memory reading spells
>Thunderlane gets off Scott free on technicalities
>Anon goes to jail for abduction, unlawful imprisonment, assault, torture, official misconduct and perjury
>>22605658
>mfw no Twibright to bust us out this time
>>22605700
dubs confirm, Anon's fucked
>>22605658
>a Prince
GG.
>>22605658
>Mentions memory reading spells
>Says that Thunderlane who had just attempted to rape Rainbow Dash earlier gets off Scott free
>>22605658
Royalty...............
I want to see how this plays out in fifes story
>>22593602
> You are Twilight Sparkle
> You are well aware that you're not the most up spirited you've ever been.
> Or the most put together... but why is Big Mac looking at you like that?..
> Maybe he's had a bit to much to drink?
> Your insecurity kicks in as you feel like his eyes can see through your lies.
> Like he can see your secrets, the very ones you wish never happened.
> Beginning to internally assault your self you think, ' He knows... Why wouldn't he. He's Anon's best friend. They tell eachother everything'
> Playing with the ice in your drink your mood worsens as you look to him.
"Big Mac? " you voice soft.
> He blinks realizing he was staring too long.
"I...is everything ok?" You try to ask him some what shakily, hopefully diverting his thoughts.
> He takes a second to respond "Eeyup..."
> He was never incredibly talkative to you.
> You knew you had to read into him a little more to figure him out.
> His mannerisms were telling you he was definitely thinking about something, looking somewhat conflicted.
"A..are you sure?" You look up at him examining his reaction recalling a book you read on deceit indicators.
> Big Mac touched a hoof to his cheek, scratching a fictitious itch before nodding and avoiding eye contact.
> 'Those were two big indicators' you thought to yourself.
> You look at him as he takes another long drink, placing the glass down between the both of you, turning away.
> Is he avoiding you now?
> Your analytical brain begins to activate.
> He obviously is over thinking something, he's displayed physical deceptive indicators, he's avoiding eye contact with you... He's here to see Vinyl Scratch.. alone?
> ...Vinyl Scratch,Anon's favorite... ANON!
> Your eyes open widely involuntary as you reach your conclusion.
> You stare at him.
> He turns to you with a confused face.
"H-he's... he's here isn't he." You do your best to keep your voice under control.
> Drowned in Love: https://youtu.be/9WBia_7jQqA
> A new song begins.
93/?
>>22605365
Personally I really want to see the torture scene.
Why everyone is telling "this is too edgy" etc.
Come on guys, blood isn't that terrible. What's wrong with you? Anon was a soldier in this story, he knows his stuff...I want at least some blood here.
>>22606729
It's drama time!
>>22606737
It's because they're crybabies afraid that a bit of harshness will kill the story.
>>22606737
This.
>>22606737
It's like "someone has raped your mother, nah let's just arrest him instead of torturing"Need to see tortures.
>>22606737
>After all this RD's story, Anon chooses to just call the guards instead of punishing a fucker himself.
>Nope.
Not in Fife's green.
>>22606729
(Last line got cut)
> A new song begins to play as Big Mac appears to be sweating slightly.
> "Nnope" he replies lifting his drink looking towards the mirrored wall behind the bar.
> Your heart rate is up at the possibility of your love being here.
> Your eyes dart desperately around the ground level scanning for him.
> This could be your chance to talk to him.
> To tell him how sorry you are and beg him to forgive you.
> You had to try.
> Regret was heavy on your shoulders every moment of the day.
> There was nothing you wouldn't do for his forgiveness.
> There was no denying that you took advantage of his trust in you, and you need to make it right.
> You become frustrated not seeing what you are, at this point, desperately searching for.
"Big Mac,please! If he's here, tell me where he is! " your eyes pleading as they begin to mist.
> The way he looks at you reads as a indignant 'why should I tell you anything' face.
> Saying nothing after a few moments he raises a hoof pointing to the front door.
> You look to the door and back to him confused.
"You knew he was here and didn't tell me?" Feeling somewhat betrayed.
> "Eeyup." His tone defensive as he responds not looking at you, glass to his mouth.
> His tone causes you to flinch a little.
"So he left then?.." you respond with a tone full of defeat.
> Another moment of silence passes as he sips his drink, still not facing you, "Eeyup.."
> The feeling of loss flows through you again.
"You know... Don't you.." your voice is quiet looking down to the counter.
> He looks to you for a short moment without expression saying nothing, and turns back to the stage.
> He didn't respond with words, but you understood.
> You felt humiliated as the party continued around you.
> The happy, the drunk, all lively partying about.
> They're going to find out...all of them.
> What are you supposed to do?
> You have no one to blame but your self.
> Before you realize it your hooves were taking you to the front exit
93/?
>>22606869
I want a story where some other mare cheats on Anon and Twilight is the one to comfort him. I can only read about my waifu suffering so much, even if it is completely her fault in the context of the green
>>22605365
I'm just worried about the consequences of our actions. But I think I'd rather you skipped it.
>>22607041
It'd be interesting to have Twilight cheat on Anon and then have Velvet come and comfort him.
Lots of interesting things can be done with this idea and many feels can be dealt out.
>>22607063
But that is still Twilight cheating and just changing the other mare. I want someone else to do the betraying for once.
Or, you know, maybe something new altogether. This IS the "Marital Problems" thread, not the Adulterous Twilight thread anymore. We're open to new scenarios here, folks.
>>22607083
Well feel free to give it a twirl then Anonymous, if you got some ideas don't feel afraid to share some green with us.
>>22607124
You don't want to read my green. Not to mention I should be doing a programming assignment right now.
>>22601927
riiiiight...
>>22602331
while i'm not a fan of grimdark or edge, and i certainly hate anon in this fic, sure is well thought out and written so far!
>>22605365
quite a split response so far.
i don't particularly care if you write the torture or not, i'm more concerned about anon doing something so potentially stupid as has already been mentioned. ultimately tho, what i've loved about your story is it has been so real... so as long as the path you choose doesn't rely on plotholes or any other kind of artistic license, i'm a happy camper.
>>22607050
>consequences of punishing a rapist
>are you kidding me?
>>22607148
Well if you post green or not best of luck with that programming assignment, that shit sucks.
>>22607050
>>22607226
Quote:
>Save for his hands. They were shaking slightly.
"Tell me, what does Thunderlane look like again?"
>His question was straightforward, but he was rather quiet as he said it.
This means, that Anon would rather discipline Thunderlane himself than call the guards.
>>22607236
Tourture by himself rather then a trial by law. I'm sure it'll go down fine.
>>22607341
He still has his "Prince" title. He can do it without any consequences
>>22606869
> Tears were welling in your eyes but you didn't want any pony to see you cry.
> It felt as if your entire life was crumbling around you, as lights flashed, colors changed and ponies enjoyed their night, laughing, smiling and dancing.
> Among all of this you felt completely alone.
> Exiting the doors you are met by the bitter bite of the night air.
> A cold breeze sweeps over you causing your tears to begin to spill.
" Anon, my love, my life." You say aloud to yourself holding back a sob. "I'm. ..so..sorry.."
> Pinkie comes running out after you as tears begin to spill over your cheeks.
> She trots over to you, concern all over her face "Twi? What's wrong?"
> She begins to wipe some of your tears away, moving some of your mane away from your face.
"He's not going to come back Pinkie" you squeeze your eyes shut holding back tears.
> You take a few deep breaths trying to compose yourself.
"It's my fault. It's all my fault.."
> "Who Twi? What happened?" She begins rubbing your back.
" Anon.." you inhale trying to keep control.. " I... i.. "
> "Oh did you see him?!" She lights up a little.
"I..." you snap out of it a little looking at her confused, " see him? What do you mean, he left didn't he?"
> She giggles a little, " Nooo silllllly" she says a little drunkenly " I just saw him! He's on the second floor in some VIP thingy!"
> She pats you a little " So cheer up ..." > You cut her off as you sprint back to the entrance.
> "Buckooo... oookkaayy?" Pinkie makes her way back to the doors swaying with a mildly intoxicated wobble.
94/?
>>22607505
Pinkie Pie: World's Greatest Jobber
>>22607505
> You cut her off as you sprint back to the entrance.***
Idk why it did that. Anywho, I have a little more but I think I'm calling it a night. Ill update tomorrow or later if i cant sleep. Sorry for not getting more done, I hope it's enjoyed anyway.
>>22605365
Honestly I hope that Anon will torture him using medieval methods
>>22607598
Bump
>>22605365
I'd say it'd fit the thematic arc of your Anon to show the scene. Part of why I avoided it in mine was that I was already on that tight rope, but your Anon has shown a carefully constructed, storied descent into madness, and it could make for a powerful character moment because of that build up.
But of course, the creative license is yours. Gotta do what you want, and our enjoyment of the story will flow from your artistic vision.
>>22607505
Luna delivering fatal blow to steal Anon
>>22608727
Aaand spoiler thing fucked this post, I suggest deleting and re-writing
>>22608735
Yeah. Sry.
>>22605238
>She about choked.
Choked with him.
>>22605288
>"I-I don't g-get why he'd t-try to do that..."
Soo feelsy.
>"Hold on, maybe this'll help." you tell her, as you pull a shirt out of your dresser.
>"What's that for?" she asks, sniffling a little.
HNNGG! Boner, not now!
>>22605307
>Not a word is said by either of you in this situation, but she takes a deep whiff of your scent still embedded in the fabric and visibly calms down further.
Diamond stick appeared.
>Her lovely scent that reminded you of a fresh spring morning.
Skittles time!
>>22605323
>They could also help set up a lovely room for you to play with him.
YES! Make him cry.
>>22605365
>Do you guys want to see torture as it happens, or should I skip in a similar fashion as the other lovely writepal?
No. I want to know revenge is done, but anon is too good guy for me.I prefer to see done damage that look at ihem when they are making.
>>22608741
No problem m8, also, select the little box next to your name on the previous post, and scroll to the bottom, then click "delete":^)
>>22608747
But I have done that already.
Now it looks like I wanted.
>>22607598
Yet another excellent installment. I hope I can write Twi half as sympathy-inducing as you can.
> My heartstrings cannae take it cap'n!
>>22607598
Sorry, Without_Aname, but I'm no able to keep up your pace with posting, so I will read it from pastebin again, as fast as possible - so update it, faggot!
Just to clarify then, I might do a vote. I'm going to make a torture thing work, but it's not going to really get bloody.
I'm not all about knife-play. I like the idea of water-dripping/waterboarding/blasting high intensity sounds for hours at targets.
I'll see the responses later.
>>22608968
Gib him to the guard and then make sure he will be hanged for that.
>>22608968
Well, Anon can later train his men in torture, and combat.
I really want to see this shit. Also, to everyone fearing for him, don't, he is a Prince, and to everyone talking about mind reading spells, they have never been cannon in the the mlp universe.
>>22609413
>talking about canon in a greentext story about Twilight cheating on her human husband
And being a Prince doesn't make him immune to the law and being punished for breaking it.
>>22609620
As a Prince, he can punish deliquents himself.
He's like a judge here.
>>22608968
Fuck, I need to see this tortures!And honestly I want to see him even dying in pain. Yeah.
>>22609620
Asaulting a prince is punishable by death. Yet I don't see neither Shining neither Anon "being hanged by the neck until death".
>Check your Equestrian laws priviledge.
>>22609659
Proper punishment, perhaps, but I doubt torture falls under standard or acceptable procedure and therefore he wouldn't be protected by his status.
>>22609620This Anon's totally wrong
>>22609684
He can take deliquent under his control, and do anything he wants.
Equestria is not Earth, they have better law.
>>22609710
>they have better law
>allowance of torture is better
I think our ideas of 'better' are a bit off.
But regardless, I think this torture turn killed the story for me, guess I'll just stick around for Without Aname's story.
>>22609413
And who will be able to read Anon's mind? He is a human, not a pony, so they even don't know how human's brain work.
Looking forward to see the tortures
>>22609746
Nobody's stopping you, go ahead.
Making yourself a victim won't change anything
>>22609746
This story is about Anon killed in battle on the Earth. What did you expect? A romance comedy?
>>22609746
You are so precious anon. I bet your fetish is consensual sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation.
>>22609746
>>22609710
>My law senses are tingling.
As a law student, I feel a need to point out that torture isn't explicitly illegal under U.S. precedent, by virtue of secret court rulings their government instituted under the Bush admin, suspending 18 U.S.C. § 2340 through the Patriot Act and the Military Commissions Act 2006. Hence the lack of prosecutions after the torture report was released, because the action was legal. And as a Canadian law student, I feel a need to point out that the only relevant law on the subject is U.S. law. The U.N. Resolutions have no real power in this regard.
But I do agree, I don't think a system like Equestria would actually permit torture, especially without special authorization. Equestria's special mix of classical monarchy and renaissance world suggests to me something like a Constitutional Monarchy, which would restrict the powers of the Prince.
But I imagine Fife is planning to plot the course of the story so as to avoid the Prince facing a legal battle, as that's harder to make interesting. I don't think our arguments about Equestria's justice system are terribly relevant; it's obvious he's being a vigilante.
Also:
> Implying Anon will still be a prince once the divorce finalizes.
> Implying any prosecutor wouldn't wait the month for immunity to drop to press charges.
>>22609933
Also, If we are taking laws to account then, all the guards in Anon castle should be dead, for helping him, and Shining Armor and him too because the assault of a Prince is punishable by death, not minding that Shining was the one who wanted to kill him in the first place.
>Y'all need to check your monarch equestrian laws privilege.
>>22609933Holy shit, you actually had time to write this
IMHO Prince of Equestria has a lot of permits, especially, when he's not a pony.
Unfortunately we can't be sure about it, but I believe, that torturing is a thing there.I think that Luna's guards is still doing it
>>22610006
>guards are*
sorry, posting from telephone
>>22609992
Yeah, this Anon has some good points. I think that Fife's Anon and his guards are entitled to do more things.
Come on, just let the tortures begin
>>22609933
Also, you need to remember that Twilight said to him that he can take anything he wants in the divorce, except for the castle of course. He could afford to stay with the title of Prince Anonymous.
>>22610083
That moment, when this Anon is actually right.
Bump.
>>22607505
FUCK YOU PINKY
>>22608805
http://pastebin.com/qkzvmQcF
Updated.
Sorry, I don't get alot of time to sit and write blocks of green. I get it in when I can.
>>22608775
Thanks Loki.
Bump.
>>22607083
Missed this post earlier. It's funny, I had actually originally written out my first dump with Luna as the princess who betrayed my Anon.
Thought about playing up the loneliness angle, in conjunction with the distant element of my Anon. Added an extra twist of guilt on her part for betraying someone again.
But it almost hurt to write. Luna's too bro-tier for such shenanigans, and I say this as a Twifag.
>>22611165
This thread is the bane of Twifags. Trust me, I am one
Read till the very end. You won't regret it
>>22611208
This.
>>22607505
> You explode through the entrance walking quickly, bumping into random ponies not caring who says what, ignoring the grumbling and complaining.
> Big Mac can see you coming back in looking up this time.
> His mouth drops open a little as he glances to where Anon is eyes wide.
> He tries to make his way towards you, but it's crowded.
> Your heart thumps heavily scanning the VIP areas as your breathing is both excited and tired from your sprint and pushing.
> You can see some random dancing ponies... some vaguely familiar faces. The back of a tall..
> Gasping you squint a little trying to peer through some fog.
> That's him!!! His back is facing you but you could tell without a doubt it's your husband.
> You try walking around the side to get a better look and to find a way up to him, wearing a giddy smile.
> Excitement grips you, you found your husband, your love!
> You understand that he probably didn't want to see you, but you need to see him.
> You need to explain how sorry you are and beg for forgiveness and understanding, you can't lose him now.
> The song is nearing it's end.
> Many ponies are dancing close enjoying the intimate embrace of their dancing partners.
> Adjusting your angle, you can see... he's not up there alone.
> You pause and stare as it appears he's dancing? .. With who you can't see yet.
> He is swaying though.. and is that hooves around his neck?..
> Your heart feels like it's going to stop and your smile fades as his dance turns him to an angle you can clearly see.
> You take a step back as a tremble can be heard in your breathing.
> Your chest is heavy with tension and stress.
> An emotional ache radiates throughout your body as you feel weak.
> You have found your love.
> And he is in the embrace of another mare.
> Foreheads touching lips almost together.
95/?
>>22612682
> All you can do is stand in shock right before you fall back on your flank, tears beginning to fall from your eyes without blinking, and mouth slightly open in disbelief.
> You watch as his lips graze hers and plants a kiss on her cheek near her ear as they whisper to each other.
> ... You watch as she closes the distance pressing her own lips against your husbands.
> ... And you watch as your husband smiles back after this, while they continue to dance, the same way he would with you.
> He still holds her, Princess Luna, looking happier than ever.
96.5/?
>>22612704
Ha! Right in the feels!That's what I have needed
>>22612704
She shouldn't be surprised at all. She cheated on him, and that's what she got.
>>22612704
>>22612842
This. Now she knows exactly what she made him feel like, though Anon probably had it much worse.
Hopefully I'm not interfering with Without's drop.
>>22602331
> "Why yes! You don't get to look this good without your beauty sleep!"
> The mare slowly sauntered across the room until she could speak in a lower tone.
> "The paperwork is filed for Flash's 'transfer.'"
> A small smile spreads across your face.
"I appreciate it, Mayor. Can't imagine where I'd be without you."
> She titters, poking your leg with a hoof.
> "Don't mention it, Anon. Anything you ever need."
> And she bumps your leg with her flank.
> "And I do mean anything."
> She's definitely playing the game.
> And you love it. There are so few who appreciated the art like you did.
"I'll have to keep that in mind. Care to have lunch?"
> You were stalling.
> You knew you had to go to the Castle, but you needed more time.
> Time to compartmentalize your encounter with Twilight.
> The Mayor strikes a dramatic pose.
> "Why Prince Anonymous, I would be delighted. You sure your wife won't mind?"
> She might.
> Twilight had always been a protective mare, a little controlling.
> It was in her nature, you supposed.
> Like you, she craved structure.
> Things following a neatly laid plan.
> It was what had drawn you to her.
> It was what had drawn her to you.
> She exposed you to a whole other dimension of organizing, the study of magic.
> While not innately capable of casting yourself...
> You had designed a number of devices based on its principles.
> Like the special watch you wore on your wrist right now.
> In return you had exposed her to a far more complicated field of planning.
> The study of politics.
"I'm sure she won't mind if I'm a little late to visit."
>>22613161
> On your way out of the orphanage, you see quite a number of foals waiting outside.
> Alongside the press, who had returned to catch the Prince in the morning.
"Good morning, my little ponies!"
> A roar of approval surged through the crowd.
"I think I can safely say this home is one of the comfiest around, and perfectly fit for the best little foals in Equestria!"
> You kneel down and pick one up, ruffling her mane.
> A little dark blue filly.
> She giggles and swats at your hand to try and get you to stop.
> You grin as you place her atop your head, giving her a piggy-back ride.
"But I think all of you deserve a treat, first. Ice cream's on the crown today!"
> Yet more cries of approval, and a horde of foals swarming around you.
> The filly on your shoulders makes a squee of happiness.
> You start making your way to the local ice cream parlour, carefully avoiding stepping on anypony.
> It occurred to you that knowing Twilight, she had to have some sort of plan in motion.
> It would be unlike her to dive into an affair without checks in place.
> She's typically not so reckless as to risk getting caught.
> Flashes of cameras surround you, and you take it in stride, leading your troupe of foals to their destination.
> The Mayor is at your side, chatting to a young colt.
> You were surprised she didn't have foals of her own, actually.
> Nor a stallion, for that matter.
> A family was a political asset.
> Especially given the political climate in Ponyville rapidly changing...
> Before long, this little town would be a metropolis like Manehattan or Canterlot.
> Being the seat of royalty tended to do that to a town.
> And with that population, political challengers would arise.
> Perhaps it was time to discuss her political future.
> Well, that could wait.
> You had appearances to keep up for now.
"Here it is! Go in and order whatever you want, you little rascals!"
> The filly on your shoulders practically leaps off to enter the shop.
> Foals.
>>22612978
Yeah, Anon indeed had it much worse. He caught them having sex, furious sex.
Twilight slut got what she deserved. Twilight is nothing to Anon now.
>>22613187
> You were sitting in the ice cream parlour listening to one little foal tell a story.
> Well, pretending to listen anyway.
> You had a remarkable talent for pretending.
> The shop owner had practically exploded with joy at your presence.
> Oddly, not even at the financial impact of such a big purchase.
> Nor the further financial incentives of association with your name in the press.
> She just gushed over you from behind the counter.
> When you had called her by name...
> 'Bubblegum Swirl, how could I forget the owner of the best Ice Cream shop in Equestria?'
> She had practically exploded with glee that you remembered her.
> It was amazing what an impact you had on these ponies.
> But sadly, your mind remained many miles away.
> Your meeting with Twilight grew ever closer.
> In fact, you'd probably have to head there once all the foals were done.
> To visit your loving wife.
> It was a struggle to keep a grimace off of your face.
> But you couldn't risk it with the cameras all around you.
> The foal has wrapped up his story.
> You start clapping your hands, the rest of the foals follow your example.
"Why, that was terrific Skystreak! You'll be the next Shakespone yet!"
> The colt blushes, but excitedly jumps up and down.
> "You really think so? Thanks mister Nononymoose!"
> You let out a chuckle.
> You ruffle his hair as well as you stand up.
"Well, fillies and colts, I fear I must be off to go visit my princess."
> A collective 'awwwwwwwwh' cries out through the shop.
> Including one from the owner.
> Adorable.
"But you lot can feel free to drop by the castle any time I'm in town. That's a promise."
> That made their expressions do a 180. A cheer erupts.
> The instructors start shepherding out the foals.
> Chiding them about the ice cream on their faces.
> "Good luck, My Prince."
> The Mayor had snuck up beside you, giving you a grin.
> She gives you a pat on the back of the leg before following out the swarm.
> It was time.
>>22613208
> As you approach the castle, the media frenzy remains relentless.
> Constant pictures, everywhere you went.
> While it was sometimes annoying, you knew it was for the best.
> It was a constant reminder.
> To keep up your face at all times, no matter what.
> To never give the impression of the turmoil inside you.
> Because a frown could provoke a national outcry.
> An inquiry into who or what had wounded the normally exuberant prince so badly.
> And that inquiry might find more than it has any business finding.
> When you reach the courtyard of the castle, you hear your name cried out from above.
> "Anon!"
> Looking up, you see a lanky purple dragon flying down from one of the balconies.
> Prince Spike.
"Spike! It feels like it's been forever!"
> The dragon doesn't stop as he glides low, tackling you onto your back.
> He was bigger than you, now.
> "That's because it HAS been forever! I've missed you!"
> A tight hug envelops you.
> You can feel the heat radiating from his inner fire.
"Well miss no more, buddy. I'm here for a while."
> You can see the grin spread across his face.
> He adored you more than any other in Equestria.
> You were partially responsible for his growth, after all.
> You had worked your magic to learn about his specific breed's ageing habits.
> It was part of what had won Twilight's affection so many years ago.
> You pat the dragon on the side, signalling him to let you up.
> He gets up off of you, and then helps you up.
> The dust slides off your clothes itself.
> Thank you, magic.
> The giant grin remains on Spike's face.
> "Well, c'mon! Twi's been locked up in her study for days. God knows on what."
> "And we both know the only one who can break her out of that daze."
> He does an eyebrow waggle.
> You smile back.
"I'll see what I can do."
>>22612842
She's at a point where she knows she's in the wrong, but I was going for her perspective. She doesn't know where he is or what he's doing, so for her to find him in this way, even though she knows she's wrong, is still a shock to her.
>>22612704
Now you can feel it too, purple bitch.
>>22579384
>All these Octavia pics.
If this doesn't end with octavia and Anon walking off into the sunset, leaving everything behind to become traveling street preformers together,I will be dissapoint.
Keep going though it's fantastic so far!
>>22613326
Thank you based writefag. You delivered some pure good feels:^)Looking forward to see next parts.
>>22586460
>>22613432
Thank you very much guys! Unfortunately I have a lot of exams this week, so I won't have much time for writing, but I'm going to write something as soon as possible.Have some Octavia for now:^)
>>22613222
Hurmmm... I'm torn on the direction I want to take the Twilight confrontation. There's a billion different ways I could write her character and I just can't decide what I want her personality to be.
>>22612704
> Happier than ever
Happier than with Twilight, I wonder? Hurrmmm.
>>22613326
I hope that she'll not blame Anon for cheating.
>>22613544
>>22613557
Yeah don't make her angry and shift the blame. Just... please don't.
>>22613598
And this goes for
>>22612704
too
>>22613544
>>22613557
>>22613598
>>22613615
>inb4 Twilight blames Anon for cheating publicly
>inb4 Anon's reputation is in ruins
>>22613633
I assumed that this can happen. And I'm not ok with this. Writefag, don du dis.
puck
>>22613839
tuck
>>22613964
duck
>>22613598
She could go off on Luna for using his emotional state to get at him. She might say Luna is using dreams to steal him away, and use that as a reason to get Celestia involved or Cadences love repair magic, without ever needing to admit anything.
Someone remind me, wasn't there a Fleur story around?
>>22614146
http://pastebin.com/ECxRmdMf
>>22614078
wait, what?
This is just stupid. Nobody would believe her. Especially when Luna knows about Twilight's betrayal.I believe, that Celestia knows about it too.
>>22614199
>I believe, that Celestia knows about it too.
So many stories and no one showed reactions of Celestia, Cadence or Twilight's parents. Just imagine all this Twibuse.
>>22614538
>tfw I need to see it
>>22613222
Keep it coming dammit
>>22607371
maybe in your edgy, absolute justice headcanon. i think most prefer something akin to IRL, where that does NOT work.
>>22609772
the guy made a perfectly reasonable response, just said it isn't for him. why you gotta respond to that with snark? i don't see any "i'm a victim" implying, and there's nothing in his post that elicits a "nobody's stopping you". it's like you're just throwing out default rhetoric for the sake of argument.
>>22612842
i'd be surprised. i wouldn't expect my apparently devastated spouse to have found a new partner 2 days after he found me cheating. kinda suggests he/she didn't actually love me all that much to begin with.
It would appear I've upset a few people in here.
Oh well, can't please them all.
>>22615050
>I've upset a few people
on 4ch?!? no!!!
>>22615007
All of this. Especially the third point.
>>22615007
Well I mean with that first and second point...
Everyone is assuming they know exactly what I'm going to write. How many times do I have to iterate that the story isn't going to have a happy ending?
So many people think that "torture" involves someone being laid out on a medieval rack and having their legs and arms stretched to the point where they start breaking shit.
And I tried to make it clear, Anon can really do what he wants with the guards in Ponyville on his side.
I never once said that he was immune to the law, and that higher powers couldn't crack down on him.
The Anon I've portrayed isn't some saint of mercy. Nor is he some devil. He's the bad shit in all of us, mixed in the good. Gray is the theme. Not black, not white.
Don't tell me that you're afraid of me getting "edgy" with five minutes of screaming at a pony and some water-based torture. If so, then you probably don't have the stomach to have read some of the violent bits I did earlier.
>>22615577
> He's the bad shit in all of us, mixed in the good.
> Gray is the theme. Not black, not white.
This.
Do what you do Fife, I'm thoroughly enjoying it.
>>22615577
fife, my comments (and i believe many of the comments here either way) are in response to thoughts and suggestions from other anons, not directly to your implications or plans. for me at least, every time i've been a bit worried how an upcoming point would be handled, i've been very satisfied (and frequently surprised) by what you ended up doing, and i trust your judgement on this one too. and yes, you have already indicated this wouldn't be super grimdark edge torture a la Loki (no offence meant @ Loki, as despite his dark world and psychotic anon his writing is so good i've continued reading his story anyway).
>>22615007
Well, I wouldn't love a bitch that leads me to nearly die because of her actions.
She doesn't deserves his love, she knows it, she shouldn't be surprised at all.
Also, he is at the state where he is avoiding the problem. He is trying to erase her from his mind.
Bump.
>>22612704
Mini green bump
> Big Mac approaches you as you sit in the middle of the crowded dance area unable to move a muscle.
> The ponies around you dance, smile, and enjoy every bit of their own moments but it all falls deaf on your ears.
> You feel like time moves in slow motion as you watch your love hug her, as she nuzzles into his chest.
> Big Mac looks up seeing what your eyes are fixed on.
> He sighs as he looks back down to you.
> You can't move... You can't even react as the sting in your eyes and the weight in your heart do not let up.
"W-what have I done..." you whimper.
> Before you even notice, Big Mac is carrying you away.
"A-anon.." you're barely holding your self together as you are on the brink of a break down.
> Anger doesn't even enter your emotions, only guilt.
> You did this to your self... as mad as you want to be you can't.
> 'You took me away from you' his voice echos in your brain as the image of his distraught face burns your brain.
> You were brought outside but can't concentrate on what goes on around you.
> Big Mac and Pinkie are talking, but all you hear is a ringing in your ear.
> Your logical brain is unable to function in the moment as you stare blankly.
> At one point you notice Pinkie look at you in disbelief.
> Did he tell her?
> You honestly don't care anymore.
> You just want to go back in time and smack sense into yourself.
> You just want your everything, your husband.
> You just want Anon to love you again.
97/?
>>22617114
This just keeps getting better and better m8. Keep up the good work.
>>22613222
> Moving toward the castle proper, Spike begins to regale you with his exploits.
> His romantic exploits, primarily.
> The little Drake could have almost any mare he wanted.
> He was royalty, after all.
> Yet his sights remained set on his true love.
> The element of generosity.
> It stunned you that she remained single.
> It stunned you further that she continued to play coy to his advances.
> When Spike still looked young, it was understandable.
> But now, you couldn't fathom why she didn't give in.
> Perhaps she simply liked the chase.
> As you pass the main entrance, you gesture to your guards that they were dismissed.
> Only Talon remained, joining the Royal Guards in the castle courtyard.
> He was fiercely loyal.
> You wondered when the poor sap had time to sleep, with how diligently he followed you.
> But he was your most trusted advisor.
> Apart from your wife, of course.
> Hm.
> Perhaps he had moved up in the ranks, you supposed.
> Entering the castle, you're immediately struck by a feeling of claustrophobia.
> Like the walls are closing in on you.
> You feel trapped.
> Yet, through it all you persevere.
> While you were away from the cameras, you had Spike here.
> And it would crush him to know that you were upset.
> Especially if he were to discover the reason why.
"So Spike, where's your sister hiding?"
>>22617956
> "The archives, of course. She's barely been eating, too."
> So your guilt assumption was likely right.
> No doubt Spike was writing it off as her usually obsession with new knowledge.
> At least she had the decency to be upset about her betrayal.
> Looking around while walking, a thought strikes you.
"Where are all the guards? This place is barren!"
> That was generally a bad sign.
> Spike scratches the back of his head.
> "Gilded Light has them all on a search. One of his guys went missing."
> Oh?
> Seems they would find out too late that Flash went to the mayor for a transfer.
> A terrible shame, that.
"Oh? Is Gilded here?"
> Gilded in person, Light in letters.
> The differentiation gave you more plausible deniability.
> "Nope, he's out with the rest of them searching the Everfree."
> Useful.
> Walking by the door to his office, you distract Spike.
"I don't recognize that statue..."
> Of course you recognized the statue.
> Spike looks at you with disbelief, before turning to the statue.
> "That's a replica of Luna's first Night Guard, Silverwing! He's so awesome, this one time..."
> And while he's distracted, with perfect timing, you withdraw a letter.
> And slide it under the door.
> It should keep Gilded Light's conscience clear.
> And your footsteps covered.
> As Spike wraps up his little tale, you comment.
"Fascinating. Let's carry on, though. Gotta bust Twilight out of her trance."
>>22612704
Completely speculative here, but what if Luna had set everything up to sabotage the marriage? She did say that she has the ability to manipulate dreams and hide them from their owners, so would it be farfetched that she planted suggestions to Twilight, Flash and Anon to get where they are right now? Again, just a harebrained idea on my end.
>>22617978
> The door to the Royal Archives.
> You had spent many a day down there, learning everything about Equestria.
> Its culture, its heroes, its history...
> Its villains.
> You knew the ins and outs of what every Equestrian thought the model citizen was.
> And what they reviled in anypony.
> It was essential to crafting your political persona.
> The archives even possessed knowledge of foreign cultures.
> Every border state to Equestria, in fact.
> You and Twilight had spent months combing through the collective knowledge when it was uncovered.
> It was initially sealed away, only uncovered by Spike accidentally.
> There was something magical about it, that it seemed to perpetually generate new knowledge.
> News about recent events would be found in tombs in sections you and Twilight had picked clean.
> It was the eternal source of joy for Twilight.
> And where she went whenever stressed.
> It was how she dealt with stress, absorbing knowledge.
> It helped her keep her mind off the real world.
> You knock lightly on the door.
> But your intentions for subtlety are lost on Spike, who barges in.
> "Twi! We've got company!"
> You smiled.
> Spike's presence would make a useful excuse for yourself.
> It would allow you to play the game when you encountered Twilight.
> You did have to keep up appearances, after all.
> And if you focused on that...
> Then it wouldn't hurt so much.
>>22617994
> Entering the Archives, you close the door behind you.
> The room always had a certain ambiance, with it's dark blue lights.
> While you and Twilight had attempted to integrate regular lighting, it was always snuffed out.
> Twilight could never locate the source of the magic preventing the light.
> Looking ahead, you saw down the aisle Spike start descending a stairwell.
> There were seven floors you knew of, and Twilight could be on any of them.
> Better to follow the drake, he probably knew where she was.
> Keeping up a brisk pace, you reach the stairs and follow him down.
> All the while he's calling her name.
> Yet no response comes.
> Perhaps she's ignoring him, deeply involved in her studies.
> It would be like her.
> On the fourth floor, he exits the stairs.
> As you exit the door, you recognize a voice.
> "Hey, wussup?"
> Her voice.
> She must've been sleeping. She sounds tired as tartarus.
> Even still, her voice is like silk in your ears.
> "We've got company, Twi!"
> You turn around the stacks, and you can see them.
> She sits at a table by dim blue light, from one of the magic candles.
> "Who is it?"
> Spike gestures in your direction.
> As she looks up, her eyes meet yours.
> Your heart seizes, for a moment you think she shot you.
> It's the only explanation for this pain.
> Your mouth feels full of cotton, and you struggle to swallow.
> But you force the mask into position.
> You had to keep up appearances.
> For Spike, of course.
"Hey, Sparky. I'm home."
>>22615007
>he/she didn't actually love me all that much to begin with
well, or they're rebounding as a coping mechanism for the hurt. but the way it is written doesn't seem to suggest that so far.
>>22618009
That'll be it for the night. Tomorrow, the Twilight Saga begins!
Sleep tight friends.
>>22618009
>Shot through the heart and you're to blame!
>You give love a bad name.
>I play my part and you play your game!
>You give love a bad name.
I couldn't help but hear this.
>>22611368
I almost jumped ship anon but it was worth it.
>>22613692
>inb4 Luna defends him
>inb4 pone on pone battle out of nowhere
Dear god.
>>22617726
Thanks bruh.
>>22617982
If you tell them, they'll knowww. -ssiigghh-
>>22618261
Pastebin, I can has it?
>>22611368
I didnt like the ending. I enjoy raged anon. Id be the same way If I saw what he saw.
>>22618673
But it was all a ruse. He didn't actually see it
>>22618009
See people, this Anon is not a bad person, torture and murder are necessary in some cases, and in this case it was needed.
Also, he is feeling like shit, hell, he must be feeling rage and anger in this very moment but he won't show it, because his people and Spike don't need to be involved in his shit, they need a strong man who guides them in the dark.
>>22618716sad that people like that only exist in stories
>>22618545
Here it is, m8:
http://pastebin.com/sx3mi9qS
Hello, am new here could you tell me what is this thread about?
Last place I went it will die soon, so I need somewhere else to lurk.
Are there good stories here? are they long?would I ever catch up with them?
>>22618784
Did you not read the op?
>>22618784
Could you even read them? English is obviously not your first language.
Read the OP for what the thread is about.
>>22618261
>>22618743
Adding this to the current paste-list.
>>22619540
Well, thanks, guess this place is full of circlejerking assholes
>>22620666
Welcome to 4chan.
>>22620693
I rather be welcome inside your motehr
>>22620666
Oh don't be a bitch. They have a point, but I can break it down Barney style if you'd like.
Note, the name of the thread is "Marital Problems."
I wonder what that could mean? Let's take an adventure.
It means: A thread about marital problems you dingus. Everything from inability to pay the bills, to cheating spouses.
>>22620721
Maybe I should have elaborated a little more, kinda tired.
Let me reformulate, are there any main story orjust randomness?
>>22620753
Welp, there are a couple ongoing right now, but the main writers are Fife-Niner-Seven and Without_Aname.
LokiLorien is currently getting into this too, but we've had a few come and go. There aren't many...complete stories in here yet.
>>22620855
Fife, that shitposter is here and he writes?
>>22620877
Shitposter? If you're talking about the Dazzling general, don't get all pissy. He wrote in there, but he essentially got this thread off the ground and made it what it is.
>>22620896
I was there for a couple of threads and he was an arrogant asshole that thought his work was better than anything and was actually mediocre
>>22620940
...I'm there all the time and not once have I seen that.
I've seen him say that he's better than most guys there but I've also seen him say that he is mediocre, because it's not like it's professional writing.
>>22620968
Then maybe you were in a different thread.
Why do you go there if it is a dead place?
Man, people always seem to talk about me when I'm gone. Makes me uncomfortable.
>>22621186
Dont be such a bitch nigga
>>22620707
>motehr
Nice engrish.
>>22621291
>>22621314
Roight Fuggot, muh anglish superior.
Yur anglish 's weaklings anglish
>>22621316
We are defending you and your based writefaggotry, you should be thankful, now that I see your work I wonder:
Why didn't you write like that in dzg? Am gonna leave that place to come here
>>22621360
I'm seriously hoping that you're joking. Cross-thread shitstorms in this context are about the only thing that get me annoyed on this site.
But hell, I'll bite. I didn't write in the /dzg/ like that because I didn't feel as though I had a good setting. What I've done with it up to now, hasn't all been posted. I've let my one story in there that mattered take a turn closer to where I wanted it to end up, but I've left it off for now. Haven't even posted that last update.
But this cross-thread shit? Yeah, no. I'm going to just let you guys play it out. Not my problem. Here's to hoping it's just one guy shitposting.
>>22621438
Actually I came here because >>>22621046 and didn't know what happened after it.
Now I see theres a lot of hatred towards argentinian people, as an argentinian I find it hilarious.
Guess I whine a little about my inhability to write but I coming up with something, guess now I have to erase it and do something more according to this place
>mfw I just want to read green and don't care about other threads
>>22621562
>Now I see theres a lot of hatred towards argentinian people
What?
Hot dayum, I missed da drams.
>>22620940
While I'm like 98% sure this is bait, irrespective of your view of Fife you can't deny the man has quality green. While I haven't seen this behaviour you describe, even if it were true that he had a bit of an ego I'd say it's justified.
But in the event that you are genuinely interested in the thread, the main theme of our currently going stories is cheating spouses, and character development centered around how that impacts on Anon and the ponies around him. Although the thread is not limited to that premise, it is popular.
But I remain fairly certain this is just bait. Hopefully you endeavour to prove otherwise, Friend. But if it is, then I can't wait for the day I'm popular enough to attract such dedicated cross-thread trolls. Teach me, Fife-sensei!
I have been lurking and working since my last post. So here is a small update for you all.
>>22509121
>You have been driving for twenty minutes, and Luna has managed to fall asleep in your lap.
>Your mind starts to drift as you turn on to the road that will lead you on the way down the mountain.
'What am I gonna do,' you ask yourself.
>You honestly have no clue on how to confront this, and that made you uneasy.
[The rest of the ride passes without any problems, until you get within the five miles of Ponyville.]
>When you check your rear view, there is a tiny blue dot getting closer.
>Oh shit!
>When you look again, you see there is a pink dot carried by the blue.
>Double shit!
>>22621727
ask and you shall receive!
>>22622263
>Remembering the last time this happened, you put your foot to the floor.
>What made it worse was last time, it was raining.
>Seconds later however, the mare next to you rose her head from your lap.
>Either Luna felt the car speed up, or sensed your rising fear.
>"Anon?" she asked still somewhat groggy, "What is going on?"
"Pink and Rainbow dots," you say quickly, "closing fast!"
>Her eyes widen as the last time you two came here entered her mind.
>After looking back in the mirror, you see the two dots are gone!
>When your eyes turn back to the front you see Pinkie Pie sitting on your windshield!
>Your foot slams the break, and the car quickly decelerates.
>When the car comes to a stop, you look over at your passenger.
>She has an open jawed expression on her face as she stares at the pink unfazed mare on the other side of the glass.
And that is all I got! (please don't hate me)
Oh can anyone give tips on better ways to write speech for Luna? I am having trouble.
>>22622283
Have her talk like a normal person. It bothers me whenever people give her the archaic speech pattern post-season 2. She learned how to speak
>>22617114
> You are Anon
> You feel Luna push her face into your chest gently taking in your scent with a small sigh.
> It's unclear to you when you two got into this moment.
> But you know it's incredibly comforting.
> Those drinks must be kicking in, but you're glad your better judgement remained sturdy.
> It would be a lie if you said that you weren't kicking yourself right about now.
> At the end of it all though, you feel like you'll be able to look at your self in the mirror tomorrow a little eaiser.
> Your hand runs gently through Luna's incredibly soft mane before you release your hug.
> She looks at you with a small polite smile but with eyes still fill of want.
> She's good at melting you're heart tonight, she probably is nearing one to many drinks as well.
> You remember when Twilight used to... God damnit...
> The thought of your wife.. soon to be ex wife.. sends pain into your chest again...
> Maybe it was good that you halted things afterall.
> You definitely found your self caring for Luna alot, admittedly more than you thought possible in such a short time.
> At the same time though the thought of Twilight still hurt you a great deal.
> Luna begins to notice the change in mood on your face.
> " Is everything alright my dear Anonymous? " She says concerned.
> You need to collect your self right now.
"Yeah, absolutely" you put a little smile on for display.
> The thoughts that almost ruined this moment confirm the fact that you need some kind of solution with Twilight.
> Some sort of closure.
"I just was uh.. thinking I left Big Mac downstairs! I should probably get to him soon. He's probably wondering what's going on.."
> "Oh, we see.. We were unaware you were in attendance with your friend. If you must take your leave we understand." Her tone was mildly upset but understanding.
" Yeah, I should probably check in with him. He's the one who got me in here after all."
> With a weak smile she responds, "We understand Anon."
98/?
>>22617978
oh shit, just had a thought: what if the Twi getting plowed was just a changeling Flash hired for a stupid Princess fantasy?
>>22622772
I still think Luna is pulling the strings behind this shit.
>>22574797
>Check pastebin
>See "Rarity"
>Really wanting to continue it but just can't
Fuck, as much as I want to bring it back up it feels like I immediately wrote myself into a corner with it, for some reason I can't really come up with a logical conflict to happen because I think I wrote the relationship just too strong to find a flaw in. Throwing something in like cheating or whatever just feels too artificial and I really don't want to write something that feels forced and totally unnatural.
You know what? I'm gonna concentrate real hard tomorrow and try to come up with something during work, and when I do, I'll fuckin' blast off and get to writing.
>>22622742
> You are Princess Luna.
> Prince Anonymous has just informed you that he must be taking his leave shortly.
> While this upset you, you did understand that he arrived here with a friend that he must attend to.
> You just wanted to spend more time with him is all.
> Some how he had this effect on you.
> You were drawn to him unlike any other that you can recall in quite some time.
> Being one of the first ones to... examine him... You felt a certain closeness to him.
> The times you were able to enter his dreams, his memories.. his darkness.
> They stayed with you, they were so painfully relevant.
> You felt a connection with him through the pain and misfortune you both shared, feeling like you understood him more than any pony else could.
> As hopefully he could you.
> And protect him better than any pony else could.
> You were slow to acknowledge this yourself though, you never let any pony close enough to hurt you again.
> By the time you did he was with Twilight Sparkle...
> The envy you felt towards her was immeasurable.
> But you respected their relationship none the less.
> You had to...
> But the anger you felt towards her for hurting him the way she did was on a whole other level.
> "Listen I had a great time with you Luna" he says stirring you from your thoughts.
> 'He's leaving you Luna... You scared him away. You scare every pony. Fix this you monster.' A voice, all too familiar whispers in your head.
> Shaking your head a little you respond.
"We did too my dear Anon." You smile polietly. "We do hope we will be able to see you soon though."
> Looking for his reaction you notice he takes a moment to think. "Well I do need to get to Canterlot at some point to arrange some... affairs I guess. How about I visit then? In the meantime you know where I sleep" he jests.
> A light blush takes your cheeks at his joke.
99/?
>>22622832
Luna planted fake dreams into Twi and confused her into cheating on Anon. Luna ordered Flash to do it to steal Anon.
>>22622881
>Luna planted fake dreams into Twi and confused her into cheating on Anon. Luna ordered Flash to do it to steal Anon.
Twifag, plox.
>>22622832
"Yes, we do know how to find you in your dreams. We would love to see you in Canterlot as well. You are always welcome."
> "Then it's a date." He smiles at you
> You hoof at the floor looking down with an embarassed smile at the word date.
> You're sure he didn't mean it like that but still, the idea of it.
> You feel his hand under your chin, lifting it up.
> He kisses your cheek innocently enough, but you still sheepishly smile again as it causes your heart to pound against your chest.
> " I'll see you then." He waves a little as he begins to leave.
"We... we can't wait" you say quietly as he leaves.
> While he is on his way out you re examine your actions throughout the night and felt some guilt for not thinking before you let your pure emotions control you.
> Before you thought about how his emotional state might make things difficult for him.
> He was obviously still distraught over the recent events.
> But you were ultimately glad you were able to provide any level of comfort
> Even it was being a little self serving and selfish.
99.5/?
And that's all I got for the night. Hope the small update is enjoyed. I should have more time coming up to write green.
>>22622961
I want Anon to confront Twilight, I want Twilight to get blown the fuck out, then I want Luna to get the hot monkey dick.
Oh man I want it bad.
>>22622881
>B-but muh waifu
Get a load of this hothead.
>>22622961
Flash dresses up as shining, plows twily again
>>22622961
Waiting for more
BLEH. I'm so torn!
I've got two charted out pathways for the story, and I can't decide if I want to go for a tragic or redemptive arc.
I'm tempted to go redemptive, since Fife is going the other way and there's rumblings of Without's going that way with all these Luna speculations.
Note that when I say tragic, I don't mean killing Anon. I mean things get darker (Not in a gory way, but in an emotional way.)
I like both ideas, and depending on which arc will determine how I write Twi's character, but I can't decide! I feel like there's so much meat to a tragic arc, but the thread seems to want some alleviation from the grim heartstrings tension.
So I've made a poll, I might not go with the result if the other way strikes me as better, but I'm interested in public opinion and currently 50/50.
http://strawpoll.me/4115363
>>22622155
Last time it was huge. I was hoping to avoid that, but I suppose it is what it is brother.
>>22613557
A dance is hardly cheating, though the kiss does complicate things.
Working my update then.
>>22625391
Yes!!
>>22624338
>Flash dresses up as twilly, plowed by shining
Ftfy bruh
>>22624893
I'd say do what you want to do. I wouldn't mind at all if you went redemption, and at least it would mix it up a bit. Everything in this thread is so gloomy
>>22625560
That's the problem, I'm not sure what I want to do. My opinion shifts depending on the music I'm listening to, because I like both arcs.
FYI, this is the music I'm listening to for each arc. Might give you a bit of an idea where each plotline might head, if you're interested.Tragic Arc: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mR4QXswTxj0Redemptive Arc: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zREOQuaqSVk
>>22624893
If you feel like you can't decide, why not do both?
>>22625742
I was considering that. But it feels like it cheapens the story to have an alternate ending. It's a practice I'm not fond of, as a general rule.
But I suppose if that were to be what the people wanted, then I could do that. Branch the story off at this point into one storyline, and then another after.
>>22625626
"Tragic arc" seems to be in a leap to the future in Twilights funeral and King Anonymous declaring official state of war against the Minotaur Empire.
"Redemption" is her revealing to Anon what she did, and he being a little more rational forgiving her, but not without working some time on the relation first, of course, Prince Anon can't allow himself to be a betaman pussy faggot.
>>22625761
I feel akin to that, but I've also considered it. I'd say flip a coin. You'll know in the moment that it goes up into the air which one you wanted more.
I'd say that you can still do both though, without causing problems.
>>22625626
normally i always hope for redemption but... in this dark world with such a POS anon, i dont see redemption being good end anyway. if yer gonna tragic end it, this is the anon that deserves it from all the ones we've seen.
>>22626170
I love how one half of the thread seems to think Anon is Satan 2.0, and the other half thinks that he's the best leader Equestria could hope for.
It's nice to see him provoking such a diversity of thought. Reflective of the ideologies of the readers, I suppose; as to what it means to be good or evil.
>>22626170
It's going to end tragic for her.
>>22626265
Why not tragic for both?
>>22626258
Could you mix both options?
>>22626258
The ones who thinks that he is Satan 2.0 can't deny that he really is a good leader.
I mean, he IS a bastard in some cases but he also does grate things for his people, he is even more "grey" than Fife's Anon. He is going to lead the ponies to a golden era, and he will be remembered as one of the greatest rulers in Equestria.
>>22626309
Because he can use her as a martyr to wage war on the enemies of Equestria. I mean, he would still be sad because of this, but they are both going to be legends in the future of Equestria.
>>22626258
I think he's super manipulative but the ponies are so naive that a benevolent dictator can totally work. I also assume he doesn't mess with a pony unless they're fucking up.
>>22626258
>>22626398
>>22626405
i just don't understand how anyone can consider a manipulative, violent, might-makes-right asshole a good leader. effective? perhaps. at least in the short term. but dictatorship tends to have alot of nasty side effects beyond the immediate and by design justified actions of the leader, and a system that is an ideal petri dish for corruption.
no, evil is evil, no matter how you sliceand stretch, and flay, and crush, and hitit.
>>22626501
We were born through ingenuity and violence.
>>22626501
To be fair, he's in a monarchical political system. He didn't design it, he's just playing the game. He's also not a dictator, because he has three princesses he's accountable to and who limit his power.For now, anyway.
Additionally, as I said earlier, I imagine Equestria much more like a Constitutional Monarchy rather than the classical sort, with some sort of power checks by the populace. Anon is just subverting those checks with powerful connections and manipulation.
>>22626338
Sadly not, very important set pieces to each plot line would contradict the other.
I might just do one, then the other. It seems the most sensible route, especially given the close nature of the poll.
>>22626501
Except that he is not a dictator, because he doesn't have total power over the land, and he doesn't really puts himself that high.
Also, the files of the ponies that he has evidence of crimes on, are a thing that only masterminds use this days, and the fact that he even uses this information to do things that favours the populace is even fucking better.
Just think what would have happened to Twilight's reputation if the thing with Flash would get to be known of. Her life would be shattered and the public would not trust her, if the Prince, her husband, couldn't trust her. He did what had to be done.
>>22605323
>Leaving the house, you thought more on it as you looked for a nearby guard.
>It didn't take long to find one, a Private Girdner.
>He was a pretty jumpy fellow, but you were able to get him to help you find another one of his superiors.
>Taking your time, you slowly learn from them what Thunderlane looks like.
>Dash's description did well at first, but by the time you reached the castle, you had a small group together.
>You made it an order to capture him, wherever he was.
>You didn't explain what it was that he'd done, but you decided to take up a place inside of the castle barracks.
>You weren't afraid of Twilight finding you.
>She wasn't likely to exit her room for the next day, you assumed.
>At any rate, you took your time setting up a small station inside of the cell he'd be staying in.
>Therein lies the convenience of having a small dungeon in the castle itself.
>You'd hoped it'd never really have to be used, but oh well.
>Today would be fine.
>You weren't going to go too far.
>Just enough to let him know you were in control.
>You'd get him to admit to what he'd done.
>But you also weren't exactly feeling merciful today.
>Taking a seat, you looked around at the room itself.
>A simple table was in the center, two chairs by it were bolted to the ground.
>A small cot was set into the wall, but you had a number of items balanced on it.
>A small lantern with the glass removed, a couple of towels, and a large bucket of water on the ground next to it.
>That and some extra shackles.
>Alongside that, was another chair that could lean back, almost like a recliner.
>Smiling, you closed your eyes and waited.
>They'd bring him back to you.
>And you'd talk. Extensively.
>>22627054
Time to get our gitmo on...love it
>>2262705
I hope you are extra cruel :D
>>22627054
It's time to get this party started!
>>22627054
>You are Corporal Snuffy.
>And you've just apprehended Thunderlane.
>It was some pretty complex business, as it would appear that he fell off a curb after punching you in the eye.
>Dragging him back with your other fellow guards, you all did your best to keep him quiet while one of the bunch that had more medical experience than some mended his broken legs with his magic.
>It was a bad fall, if you say so yourself.
>A few ponies questioned what was going on when you'd first arrived at the park he was in, but it was royal business. None questioned after that.
>Save for a griffon who seemed rather afraid once he attempted to escape from his arrest.
>Regardless, you all worked tirelessly to bring him back to Lord Anonymous.
>He'd explained to you all that this stallion had gone and committed a terrible crime, and you remembered that a briefing had just been sent out yesterday that he may be on the watch-list.
>Apparently he'd assaulted one of the Elements, which was surprising enough as it stood.
>The thing that threw you for a loop was why they didn't already have him on the "arrest this pile of shit" list.
>Trotting along though, you began to focus back on the task at hand.
>Your usual stoicism kept ponies away, even the inquisitive few who looked on in awe at the whimpering Thunderlane.
>His legs were still covered in blood, but at least one of the bones had been pushed back in due to magic.
>Thankfully only his hind legs had broken.
>He was in a state of half-consciousness, but that was a mercy you guessed.
>Ugh.
>>22627263
>You were going to have a black eye for a week.
>It could be worse though...
>Whatever. You all reached the castle with him mostly intact.
>Pulling him into the barracks, you passed by what appeared to be a Griffon ambassador, waiting to see the Princess.
>She looked at you all with appraising eyes.
>Nodding your head, you acknowledge her.
>An almost cruel smile crosses her features, but you turn back to the barracks door and move inside.
>The other guards nearby all have smug looks on their faces.
>This guy REALLY fucked up, and you all hoped Lord Anon would give him a good stern lesson.
>In fact, a smirk crossed your own features as you saw your Lord sitting inside of the cell, his own things already prepared by the looks of it.
"Sir, we've brought the criminal as ordered." you called to him, his eyes flickering open.
>A grim expression crossed his features, but eventually turned into a smile.
>"Thank you Corporal, though it would appear he suffered some injuries. Were there...complications?"
"Yes sir, he hit me in the eye before falling off of a curb." you responded.
>He smiled at this.
>"Thank you for bringing him here. Put him in his chair." he replied, gesturing to the chair on the other side of the table.
>Following your orders, you shackled the prisoner to the seat as your comrade finished fixing up his wounds.
>"Good. Put up the veil. I'm going to wait for him to wake up." Anonymous informed you.
>Nodding your head, you all stepped back and let the magical curtain drop. It worked like one-way glass almost, so you could watch the two of them, without them seeing you.
>>22627273
>Pointing to a number of guards, you ordered them to return to their posts or find their relief.
>A few you allowed to stay if they so chose.
>They all did.
>Many of them really did love Lord Anon, because he never acted high and mighty in the sense that drove you the wrong way.
>Seeing this sort of thing though...it was once in a lifetime.
>All of you went through mental conditioning to become soldiers, and only the best of you became royal guards.
>It was put into your head that criminals were to be punished.
>And further back, was the want for combat.
>It'd been quite some time since a war had broken out, but ponies had always been about friendship and love.
>The problem was that they needed warriors to keep the lifestyle going.
>Regardless, this was something you wanted to see, as Thunderlane came to his senses with magical aid.
>>22627288
>You are Anonymous.
>And some sick part inside of you is giggling with delight.
>This attempted-rapist was going to be given a proper treatment.
>Now that his eyes were beginning to open.
"Did you sleep well sweetie?"
>Your voice is soothing as he comes to.
>"W-where am I?"
>Semi-lucid. Good.
"Oh nowhere in particular. I just want to ask you a few questions, Thunder. Is it okay if I call you Thunder?"
>"S-sure." he responded, his eyes focusing on your face. "Y-you're L-Lord Anonymous!"
"Oh don't let that bother you. I just want to ask you some questions. You'll promise to answer truthfully, right?"
>"Y-y-yessir." he managed to stammer out.
>You kept your voice calm and soothing as you started.
"Now, I'd like to start off with a simple question. How long have you known a pony by the name of Rainbow Dash?"
>He blanched at this before answering.
>"Uhhh a f-few years sir. W-we work t-together."
"Right right, okay. Good to know. Have you two ever had a history of dating?"
>>22627297
>It was around this time he noticed the shackles on his lower legs. They were chained to a bolt in the floor and would allow for some movement around the room, but not too much.
>"S-sir I've n-never d-dated her."
>At this you stand up.
"Oh, okay. Good to know." you start, before grabbing him in a choke-hold.
>"URGK!"
"Did you already forget to answer me truthfully?" you whisper into his ear.
>He tried to squak out a response, but you didn't let him as you yanked him from the chair and threw him to the recliner-like seat.
>Before he had time to catch his breath, you wrapped a chain around his chest and yanked his forelegs into shackles of their own.
>He was now immobile.
>"S-SIR I DIDN'T L-LIE!" he hollers, now fully awake but still dizzy as far as you can tell.
>You ignore him and wrap a towel over his face, yanking hard and pulling him until his head is below being level with his hind legs.
>Using your fingers to the fullest extent, you force the towel into his mouth.
>You then take the bucket of water and begin to fill up a large cup with it.
>Leaning down, you pour it onto the towel and over his face.
>His reaction is immediate as he tries his hardest to flail about, trying to scream as the water sends his body into a fight or flight mode.
>Forcing down harder, you hold him down as the water spills everywhere, more of it going into his nose and mouth as well.
"TELL ME THE TRUTH!" you yell before pulling the towel away.
>He sputters and gags, trying to speak.
>>22627307
>Before giving him a chance to answer, you force the wet rag into his mouth and begin dumping more water onto his face.
>This goes for about ten seconds before you pull back again and start speaking quietly.
"This can end whenever you want it to. Just tell me the truth."
>"I-I-*cough* d-dated h-her f-for a coup-couple days." he manages to get out.
>Giving him a slight breather, you continue.
"So why did you try raping her?" you ask, skipping a few more questions. You decided to get to the meat of the problem, rather than playing around.
>Though, you didn't give him a chance to answer before shoving the towel back into his mouth.
>Pulling the entire bucket up, you poured straight from the source until at least a few gallons had been drained onto his face.
>He's crying by the time you pull the towel away again.
>"I'm s-sorry! I j-just wanted to g-get back at her! I'm sor-sorry I tried to r-rape her!" he bawls
"You heard him guys. Write that one down." you call over your shoulder, before forcing the towel into his mouth once more. "You piece of shit."
>You dump the rest of the water onto his face before pulling the towel out once more and walking to the cell door.
>As you exit it though, you come face to face with your guards.
>As well as Twilight and a large female griffon.
>>22627315
That's it for now.
>>22627315
This went better than expected. I hope they enjoyed the show, the soldiers did anyway.
I hope Gilda gets what she deserves.
>>22627393
>That's it for now.
On the most interesting part!
>>22627054
>Dash's description did well at first, but by the time you reached the castle, you had a small group together.
Anon the leader! Commander lead us to Moscow!
>You'd hoped it'd never really have to be used, but oh well.
Life.
>You weren't going to go too far.
Yeah, r-right. Right?
>>22627263
>It was some pretty complex business, as it would appear that he fell off a curb after punching you in the eye.
Nobby Nobs?
Is that you?
>It was a bad fall, if you say so yourself.
Yes, I'm sure it's you!
>His legs were still covered in blood, but at least one of the bones had been pushed back in due to magic.
Really, really, wtf happended to him so early?
I mean, Anon even didn't start his fun and he is cripled for good already.
>>22627273
>In fact, a smirk crossed your own features as you saw your Lord sitting inside of the cell, his own things already prepared by the looks of it.
His Lord.
I like this guy.
>Nodding your head, you all stepped back and let the magical curtain drop. It worked like one-way glass almost, so you could watch the two of them, without them seeing you.
The show is on!
>>22627288
>A few you allowed to stay if they so chose.
>They all did.
Kek!
>Many of them really did love Lord Anon, because he never acted high and mighty in the sense that drove you the wrong way.But that damned Twi didn't!
>>22627297
>And some sick part inside of you is giggling with delight.
Not only in him!
>"Did you sleep well sweetie?"
HAHAHA!
This post made my stomach trembles.
>>22627307
>"Did you already forget to answer me truthfully?" you whisper into his ear.
Pure lover.
>"TELL ME THE TRUTH!" you yell before pulling the towel away.
>He sputters and gags, trying to speak.
You sick bastard.
I love you.
>>22627315
>Though, you didn't give him a chance to answer before shoving the towel back into his mouth.
You, sir, are very serious sick, just like I'm.
>As well as Twilight and a large female griffon.
OH BOY!
>>22627315
Oh God Fife, the cliffhanger. Why you do dis.
>>22618009
> Your mind tells you to move toward her.
> But your body is frozen in place.
> Fortunately for you, she does the movement for you.
> "Anon!"
> She cries out ecstatically.
> Jumping out of the chair, she gallops in your direction before taking flight.
> Much like Spike, she tackles your chest.
> Her hooves going around your shoulders.
> But unlike with Spike, you don't fall.
> You catch her and put your arms around her as well.
> The soft feeling of her hooves on your back feels like fire.
> Every point of contact is torturous.
> Her face snuggles into your chest.
> "I missed you..."
> A cringe briefly lights your features.
> How the hell could she maintain such an air of joy.
> How could she play the game so well, when you could barely do it.
> Assuming she's playing, that is.
> Perhaps you never meant as much to her as you thought...
> If she could ignore her betrayal like this.
"I've missed you too, Sparks. It's been a while."
> The words are like poison in your mouth.
> They come out naturally, but burn away at you all the while.
> She looks up, obviously aiming for a kiss.
> But suddenly, hesitation.
> From both of you, it seemed.
> Rather than going for the lips, she went for your neck.
> And you went for her forehead, at the base of her horn.
> She was playing the game as well.
> She had to be.
> The alternative was too horrible.
>>22628301
"Spike tattled, missus. Sounds like someone's been neglecting their food."
> The dragon huffs over by the desk.
> But a large smile remained on his face seeing you two interact.
> That was what mattered.
> Appearances.
> She adjusts in your embrace so she can turn around.
> Looking over at Spike, she points a hoof, childishly laughing.
> "Traitor!"
> They briefly quibble about loyalties.
> The topic itself feels toxic to you.
> But worse, is the manner of their discussion.
> It feels so natural.
> So much like before.
> Gods, you wish it could go back to before.
> When you didn't have to pretend around her.
> The only one you could be yourself with, who understood you.
> And you had lost that rock.
> A cold fury is building in your chest, but you keep it in check.
> You would have to be your own rock.
> For the sake of Equestria, and all those within it.
"Well, on the plus side, your flanks are feeling more toned for it."
> That earns you an indignant "Hey!" from Twilight.
> And an uproarious laugh from Spike.
> Especially when a rumble from Twilight's stomach seals the deal.
> You let out a laugh.
> You hope that sounded natural.
> You gently let Twilight down, before gesturing towards the stairs.
"But as much as I appreciate them, we'd best get you some food, before you start eating books in your sleep again."
> As she moves past you, lightly responding to your comment, you still feel frozen in place.
> Your eyes following her as she moved to the stairs.
> She was beautiful.
> Why did she have to be so beautiful.
>>22628315
> Reaching the top of the stairs, you follow her out of the archives.
> The hallways remain barren.
> You needed to know that she was playing the game.
> That she was hurting too, under that relaxed face.
> It was a risk to bring up the subject, but your conscience demanded it.
"So Spike tells me the guard's off looking for somepony?"
> Twilight briefly sputters.
> A great burden feels lifted from your shoulders.
> Her composure returns immediately.
> But that reaction was all you needed.
> "Yes, one of the junior members of the guard disappeared near the Everfree Forest."
> A terrible shame, that.
"Disappeared? Do they think it's desertion, or did some beastie nab him?"
> You can see her façade crack again.
> This time she can't fix it quite so fast.
> "Gilded Light said he wasn't sure yet, they were looking into it. They're all combing the forest now for a trace."
> Then he had played his part admirably.
> Ponies place such value on harmony, on trying to keep things the same.
> Never changing.
> The chaos of uncertainty frightens them.
> They'll do anything to keep the status quo, or at least the illusion of it.
> Sacrifice anypony else to maintain their own harmony.
> It's why you had to keep this marriage together.
> It would rend this country asunder otherwise.
> Sadly, in this case, you were the sacrifice.
> You reach the kitchens, where a chef immediately trots up to Twilight.
> But you gesture with a hand for her to relax.
"Don't worry about it, Cuisine. I'll make us all some lunch."
"Gotta prove that what you taught me stuck, right?"
> The chef mare blushes immensely, but capitulates, offering the kitchen up to you.
> The personal touch.
>>22628325
> While you were cooking, you sent Spike out to invite Talon in.
> In the early days, Talon had always refused to eat with you.
> "I could not disgrace the Fylkir by eating in his presence."
> A title you had earned among the Gryphons.
> It made it difficult for you to build the personal connections you liked in your business.
> You were working a number of frying pans.
> The title translated loosely to Peacekeeper.
> It was the most respected honorific in their culture.
> It was a religious title, really.
> While they were warlike by nature, and always aggressive...
> They valued peace all the more for it, believing those who could attain it to be Godlike.
> A fire flares up over Twilight's meal.
> Looking over it, you see it is ready, quite a bit before the rest.
> Such is the nature of vegetarian dishes.
> You put it under a heat lamp.
> Four years ago, you personally had stopped a civil war between member states of the Holy Accipi Empire.
> In return, they declared you Fylkir, and offered you anything you could want from their people.
> It was why you had a personal guard of Gryphons.
> The Empire was a political body formed of all the various independent Gryphon Kingdoms.
> They valued you as if you were one of their own, and felt the ponies were unworthy of protecting you.
> On the flip-side, the ponies thought the Gryphons were inappropriate for protecting their prince.
> But their presence is good for Equestria.
> It has shown the ponies that the Gryphons are not all blood-thirsty warmongers.
> And it has shown the Gryphons that the ponies could exemplify the core Accipi virtues.
> Loyalty, Respect, and Self-Sacrifice.
> Those virtues made them the perfect confidants.
> The meat is done
> You begin to plate the meals. Including one for Talon.
> Fortunately, you managed to convince Talon it was alright to eat in front of you over time.
> The poor Gryphon even used to pray to you.
> Now, you think, he prayed for you instead.
"And Lunch is served!"
>>22627315
>"It saddens me we have come to this, Anon, and for such a reason. Why not simply arrest Thunderlane and let due process deal with him?"
"He needed to be punished."
>"And you do not believe the law could do this?"
"The Law did."
>"No, Anon, you took matters into your own hands. A legal option was open to you and you ignored it for personal reasons, and you even included the Guard who share in your crime and will share in your punishment. You have broken the law, Anon.""I CAN'T BREAK THE LAW! I AM THE LAW!"And then Anon went to jail, where he made everyone his prison bitch, except Power Bottom because he liked it too much.
>>22628315
Man, this shit hurts.We done good.
>>22628396
Well, he can say that this is one law from his world, implying this Anon came from ´Murica. Two words: "Patriot Act". Hell, he could really enforce this shit on Equestria.
>>22628347
>"The poor Gryphon even used to pray to you."
>"Now, you think, he prayed for you instead."
This made me remember pic related.
>>22613187
>"Here it is! Go in and order whatever you want, you little rascals!"
Sweet Anon is sweet.
>>22613208
> Well, pretending to listen anyway.
Son of a... I would do this same.
> To visit your loving wife.
...
> "You really think so? Thanks mister Nononymoose!"
Kek.
> The instructors start shepherding out the foals.
Shepheding, such a nice word!
>>22613222
> He was bigger than you, now.
Wow!
Really great concept!
> You were partially responsible for his growth, after all.
Sweet Anon again!
> "Well, c'mon! Twi's been locked up in her study for days. God knows on what."
HAHAHA!
>>22617956
> The little Drake could have almost any mare he wanted.
Finally!
> Perhaps she simply liked the chase.
HA! Canonful!
>>22617978
This post melted my black heart.
>>22617994
> Its culture, its heroes, its history...
> Its villains.
HA!
> It would allow you to play the game when you encountered Twilight.
Anon is a manipulative badass.
He seems right for me.
>>22618009
From > As she looks up, her eyes meet yours.
To > For Spike, of course.
Great part!
>>22628301
> The soft feeling of her hooves on your back feels like fire.
> Every point of contact is torturous.
Shit.
> The soft feeling of her hooves on your back feels like fire.
> Every point of contact is torturous.
This gave me a cancer. It's pleasure to be dead by cancer like this.
>>22628315
> But a large smile remained on his face seeing you two interact.
> That was what mattered.
He loves him. Really.
> She was beautiful.
> Why did she have to be so beautiful.
Shit!
>>22628325
> You can see her façade crack again.
HAHAHA!
> Sadly, in this case, you were the sacrifice.
...
>>22628347
> The title translated loosely to Peacekeeper.
> It was the most respected honorific in their culture.
> It was a religious title, really.
I love how you describe the things like this.
> It was why you had a personal guard of Gryphons.
I love them instant.
> Loyalty, Respect, and Self-Sacrifice.
Sounds like honour to me.
>>22627273
eh, not a fan of the whole "fell off a curb" thing. under the table justice isn't justice. and yeah, the whole "we're bros who have each others' backs" bit feels good... until someone invariably breaks the code and screws over the rest.
plus i don't believe in "you need blood lusting warriors to protect" bit. IMO an anti-violence, non-fight happy person can be a perfectly effective warrior when it is needed. not all by any means but some. or maybe i'm just judging by myself
>>22627315
hm, he went easier on Thunder than I had expected. I've never understood why waterboarding is considered torture anyway, so long as it is practised "safely" with medics on standby in case of vomit ingestion etc.
guess i'd have to experience it myself to understand. or is waterboarding simply ineffective on some people?
>>22628915
They goes creasy.
It's a torture because you feel like you are under water. But you are not. But you feel it.
It's like pushing your face to toilet, and keeping it there.
Feel it bro.
>>22628931
Waterboarding isn't really considered torture in some states, but it's pretty terrible.
If you've got a rag stuffed into your mouth and a bucket of water pouring into your face, your body thinks you're drowning when you aren't.
It's a trick to make your body itself fight against you and say "You're drowning motherfucker."
>>22628841
We just don't see it the same way, is all I can say. I'm not anti-violence in the slightest. Sure, when it's senseless, it's stupid. But I see things like violence in quite a number of ways as potentially justified.
I'm not about to act like I'm above it. We were born through ingenuity and violence.
>>22628315
>Why did she have to be so beautiful.
i know that feel.
i stuck around waaaay too long and put up with too much from a chick cause she was just so damn attractive to me.
there are times when it really sucks to be a man.
>>22628969
>It's a trick to make your body itself fight against you and say "You're drowning motherfucker."
That's why it's horrible.
>>22628915
See >>22628969
Nobody can really be "resistant" to waterboarding if it's done right. It makes your body fight itself. It's like forcing a brain to start hitting the "Defcon 1" button and panic like no other.
>>22628931
>>22628969
i get the "feels like you're drowning" part, but i spent plenty of time underwater in my teens springboard diving and otherwise playing in pools. sure it doesn't feel good when you're running out of air, but so long as you expect your jailers aren't actually gonna let you die, the fear of asphyxiation should be manageable. plus i don't see any diff between simulated drowning vs just plain choking you/blocking your airway without water. again, maybe it isn't effective on people who are very comfortable in/under water? or i'm being a naive privileged pleb who's never had to experience anything like that (admittedly i do NOT like when i'm not in control... THAT part might bother me, but i simply can't categorize it along with things like pulling out your fingernails).
>>22628969
i mean anti-violence in the sense of "except as last resort", vs the stereotypical warrior who jumps to it pretty quickly. but of course, when it comes to defence, when diplomatic options are exhausted and you cannot abide by turning the other cheek/accepting your losses, then yeah, violence is necessary and justified.
>We were born through ingenuity and violence
true, but kinda misleading. that suggests that more violence is better, which it clearly isn't. also, any "this is what got us here" logic is always fallible. medicine-free living got us where we are. so did living without government, or doctors, or technology, or agriculture etc. yet all those things are BETTER going forward. and if we can evolve away from violence, i think we would progress/grow even more since violence is by nature destructive and wasteful of resources. utopian an ulrealistic in the foreseeable future shit, but still.
captcha atear
>>22628841
>2015
>Against torture and law by own hand.
You are some kind of special snowflake, don't you?
>>22629112
>thinking there's something wrong with being against torture
Careful kid, cut yourself on that edge and you might miss school tomorrow.
>>22629112
nah, just wish we lived in a world where that stuff simply wasn't necessary.
also, old and observant enough to know that "law by own hand" sounds good to everyone... until they realize that also means law by hands other than their own. we all think we're right, and everyone else is wrong. see "i'm an above average driver".
>>22629081
That doesn't mean it's better, violence just IS what it is.
But the "last resort" take to violence is a bit silly to be honest. Speed and violence go hand in hand.
>>22629216
>"last resort" take to violence is a bit silly
we'll just have to agree to disagree on that.
sure jumping to that conclusion is quicker, but also results in alot of unnecessary and even incorrect (misidentified/wrongly accused target) loss. think of all the recently publicized cop shootings. some were correct, some were not. someone walks past you on the street, you see a bad look on their face, pull out your piece and shoot them. hey, it was the quickest and surest solution to the situation right? cept he just had a bad face cause he bit into a sour candy. and he was a promising cancer research doctor. yeah, extreme and silly example but just illustrating the concept.
not saying leave yourself wide open and vulnerable until you KNOW you are 100% going to be killed, just be prudent with violence, use it when you HAVE to. and yes, these are all rather academic points, but it is a discussion on the internet, it is ALL academic.
>>22629081
No, waterboarding gives more pain on the long term than most kinds of torture. You know when you almost drown that you feel the last piece of oxygen exit your lungs and then your whole body goes batshit insane? Well, those are just some seconds of what waterboarding is, as long as you have water it doesn't matter if the guy took a deep breath, the body is predetermined to act that way.
>>22629152
Don't get me wrong, I'm against torture, but when I feel the guy deserves it, nothing will change my mind (rapists, child-molesters, killers, etc).
>>22629169
If the law doesn't do it's job, or if the guy got out just because of a good lawyer and he is guilty, then yes, law by own hand should be "okay". Karma doesn't exist, the world where we live proves it.
>>22629328
>You know when you almost drown that you feel the last piece of oxygen exit your lungs and then your whole body goes batshit insane?
I do, and while physical pain hurts, scars fade and you forget that. But you don't forget drowning/near drowning, that shit stays with you. I nearly drowned when I was about 8, I'm 27 now and I still don't much care for getting into water beyond a baths/showers.
>Don't get me wrong, I'm against torture, but when I feel the guy deserves it, nothing will change my mind (rapists, child-molesters, killers, etc).
Ok, it sounded like you were shitting on him cause he didn't like torture in general. I mean we shouldn't be torturing people for little to no reason, but say someone kidnaps a kid and ain't given up the location, by all means start removing fingernails.
>>22629691
I was shitting him because I thought he disliked torture as a whole, the torture of certain criminals is into that whole, I should have stated that instead of being an idiot.
Torture is such a controversial subject in this thread, lol. I love all these debates about the ethics of torture, and what it does to the person who is the target of it / What it means about the person doing it.
>>22630302
How far would you fall in service to your people?
>>22630588
All the way to Hell.
>>22630302
My grandfather was the friend of a cop, well said cop was working on the case of a child-molester. Monts passed by and this cop found the guy, he got him to an old naval warehouse where no one could hear his screams. He tortured him to death and when he finished with him he trowed the son of a bitch to the river, they found him 2 days later.
Well, the thing is that this cop didn't showed the slightest piece of remorse. And by the words of my grandfather he was a great man and a great cop.
>>22630738
>I will never be able to serve a humanity united by its God Emperor.
>I will never march alongside my kin as we burn a path along the stars to a brighter tomorrow.
>I will never give my life in service without an instants regret, even though I fell alone countless lightyears from home.
Since we're on the topic of torture, we keep bringing up criminals, but what do you feel about torture towards soldiers? I don't mean shit like terrorists or Nazis, which aren't much different from a criminal, I mean just some average poor bastard in a war. Is it justified to torture information out of him or not?
>>22628347
> Setting down the meals in front of everyone, you took your seat.
> Right beside Twilight, as always.
> The long table had two chairs at either end, and twelve along the sides.
> Talon and Spike both went for the seat right next to you.
> But Talon is a little faster, and Spike has to settle for next to Twilight.
> It never ceases to amuse you that Talon treats the rest of Equestria's royalty like commoners.
> Twilight gives a little indignant huff at the display.
> You clap your hands.
"No sense standing on ceremony, let's dig in!"
> Spike and Talon tear into their food ravenously.
> Spike, because he always did so.
> Talon, because he hadn't eaten in hours, instead opting to stay at his post.
> Beside you, you hear Twilight sigh in contentment as she takes the first bite of her meal.
> It was Eggplant Parmigiana, one of her favourite dishes.
> You always made it for her the first day you were visiting Ponyville.
> Spike was rambling on to Talon about something or other.
> Him and Talon had always had a mutual respect for one another, as outsiders.
> It was something you knew well from the early days.
> Your eyes return to Twilight.
> You were tempted to not make that dish this time.
> It felt like you were soiling those memories.
> But you and Twilight were creatures of habit, and everypony in the room knew it.
> Had you done otherwise, they might've picked up on it.
> And that would be unacceptable.
> Your knife cuts through the steak on your plate like butter.
> To most ponies, seeing carnivores eat meat was unsettling.
> But for some reason, Twilight had always been relaxed about it.
> She always said she understood, but you had no idea how.
> She always understood everything about you.
> You feel a hoof touch your nose.
> Her soft, velvety hoof.
> You had been staring.
> "Bit for your thoughts?"
>>22631266
> Fuck.
> You were sloppy.
> The game demanded your constant attention.
> Yet you allowed yourself to be lulled into a false sense of security.
> Could you help it?
> Your former security blanket was right there.
> Gazing up at you with her big, beautiful eyes.
> It still awed you how she managed to keep this up.
> You had taught her well, it seemed.
"Can't I stare at the most beautiful mare in the world for a moment?"
> The truth behind that statement made it hurt more.
> Across from you, Spike makes a 'blech' expression, poking his tongue out.
> It was followed by a genuine smile, though.
> Twi moved up and pecked you on the nose.
> The small action sent a chill down your spine.
> And an ache through your heart.
> This was becoming intolerable.
> Keeping up your expression, you turned back to your food.
> You couldn't keep this up.
> It was emotional torture.
> How in the nine hells were you meant to keep this illusion up for the rest of your days?
> You needed to get away from the castle.
> There was never any structure while you were here.
> It was the one place where you allowed things to go with the flow.
> It was the one place where you usually didn't wear a mask.
> And you were having difficulty putting one on right now.
"So Twilight, I was thinking we could go out for dinner tonight."
> Take the bait...
> "Oh? Where to?"
"Aria's Hall. Been forever since we've had a real date night, hasn't it?"
>>22631143
Nope, not on the cards. Hate your foes, fight them and kill them on the field. But show fucking respect. You capture an enemy, he is both your prisoner and guest. And you are to grant at least the minimal hospitalities because of that. The torture of people whos only crime is that they serve their nation is to reduce ourselves to barbarism. We. Are. Better. Than. That.
>>22631282
> Her eyes light up with excitement.
> "Really?"
> You wonder if it's genuine.
> Aria's Hall was where you had taken her for your first date.
> It was very much so a high-society affair.
> Dinner, dancing, the whole lot.
> You'd been many times over the years, but it had been a while since your last visit.
> "But... Reservations there go back months, and I'd hate for somepony to lose their spot."
> "I'm not so sure we could just decide this on the fly."
> You were tired of playing politics.
> Playing romance would enable you to distract yourself from your emotions.
"I may have already arranged plans, but if you didn't want to..."
> It was a lie.
> You couldn't have possibly arranged such plans.
> But you wouldn't have a problem getting into Aria's Hall.
> There was guaranteed to be a wealthy sap you could... persuade to give you his reservation.
> But when you saw the big smile spread across her face.
> Her mouth is covered in sauce.
> You knew you would do anything for her.
> "Well then, I can't rightly say no now can I?"
> Excellent.
> "But, I'll need to get ready! I can't go there looking like I've been sleeping on a bunch of books for days!"
> It was true, she didn't look in tip-top shape.
> Her mane was sticking out at random angles.
> Her fur ruffled.
> Her feathers in dire need of a preening.
> And yet she was still perfection in your eyes.
> Why...
>>22631303
> She pushed back the chair, and got up.
> "I'm going to have to go see the stylist. Cuisine will clean up the plates!"
> "See you tonight, Anon!"
"6:30, Sparky."
> You'd find a spot at that time.
> "Gotcha!"
> She spreads her wings, and flies out of the room at incredible speed.
> With that done, you turn to Talon.
"Find me those reservations. You know who to contact."
> "Yes, my Prince."
> Within a split second, he's gone as well.
> Leaving only you and Spike.
> He breathes deeply, before looking over to you.
> "You guys are so adorkable."
> The dragon's comment strikes a nerve.
> Once upon a time, you found such a comment to be a compliment.
> Now, it hurt.
> Because it was referring to nothing but a construction.
> A falsity, built out of necessity. An illusion of happiness.
> But you don't let it show.
"I do try to be ever entertaining, Spike. Have you got any plans with the missus tonight?"
> Spike sighs.
> "As if. Rarity's impossible to woo, I'm almost tempted to give up at this point."
> It would probably be for the best.
> But those were not the words he wanted to hear.
"Hah! Those sound like quitter's words, and I know you're not a quitter."
> You point your fork at him.
"I'll have Talon rustle me up a second reservation for you, I expect you and her there at 6:30 sharp mister."
> Panic sets in on his eyes.
> "But Anon!"
"No excuses! Get to it bucko!"
> In a panic, he jumps out of his seat and tries to run the way Twi and Talon did.
> He falls briefly, but continues out.
> You laugh lightly as he makes his way out of the room.
>>22631325
> You let out a deep sigh.
> Your heart is finally beginning to settle down.
> It's been almost ten minutes since everypony else left the room.
> Leaving just you here.
> Cuisine had dropped by once, to collect the dishes.
> But you had told her you were not quite done.
> Without even looking, she had left.
> You could finally think straight, and work on how you intended this evening to go.
> If your mind was focused on making the date perfect, then you would be fine.
> So long as you had structure, you could handle it.
> But your mind had been torn asunder.
> You felt emotions you hadn't known personally for a long time.
> Doubt. Fear. Sadness.
> You had spent your entire life building up walls against those feelings.
> And Twilight had torn them down from the inside.
> As your eyes gazed over, they once again caught Twilight's plate.
> Half-finished.
> She had never left anything of that dish behind.'
> Not once, in all the years you were married.
> Not even if Celestia demanded her immediate presence.
> You casually lifted up the plate.
> And threw it at the wall.
> It was a priceless artifact.
> An irreplaceable part of the castle, having come with it from the Tree of Harmony.
> And yet, as it shattered against the wall, spreading the leftover meal everywhere...
> And fractured crystals across the floor...
> You felt a certain satisfaction.
> The heat in your chest subsided.
> It was time to plan.
"Cuisine, if you wouldn't mind, I accidentally dropped a plate..."
>>22631338
Oh God. The feels here hurt me so.
Anons wounds here are like a scourge across my brain.
I know he is a monster, and capable of some true cruelties. But I cannot help but hope he has a happy(ish) ending.
>>22631397
Though I can hear the drums thundering in the distance. Ever closer the confrontation comes, what will emerge from this cataclysm? Will this betrayal kill what humanity remains in Anons soul? Or will the Prince, Peacemaker, and future King rise again with his humanity intact? All the stronger from the ashes as a phoenix?
>>22631509
i hope this...
>>22631338
I wonder if he is going to become a monster. As long as he maintains peace in his mind while being around Twilight everything should be fine to him, to Twilight and to the future of Equestria.
>>22631397
I still want to believe that it's all part of the Changeling's plan.And by Changeling, I mean this guy.
What is this? Everyone wanting a happy ending? But the poll favoured Tragedy!
In reality, the poll was so close that I just picked a direction on my own at random. You'll see whether it's the redemptive or the tragic arc soon enough, friends.
>>22632000
Trips confirm Twilight becoming a martyr to the war against the enemies of Equestria.
>>22631303
> Her mane was sticking out at random angles.
> Her fur ruffled.
> Her feathers in dire need of a preening.
> And yet she was still perfection in your eyes.
> Why...
I just read/caught up with your story.
Hurt me moar Loki.
I wish I could update like you.
Off topic: I have some done, I might work on some moar but I had a bit much inspiration drink. So I may hold off.
Bump.
Requesting an story where Anon raises cuckold baby.
>>22633847
You mean likeraise it into the air and drop it?
>>22627307
Ha! And this is how it works! Amazing man.
>>22627393
This cliffhanger tho'
Can't wait to see more!
Welp, still working on an update, but I'm going to bed.
Will continue tomorrow. I don't have too much going on so it should be a good one.
Night all. Stay safe.
>>22622914
Green bump
> You are Anon.
> As you exit Luna's room, you notice the Lunar Guards still standing dutifully on post like statues.
> These guys were serious to a fault.
" You guys take care of Princess Luna, alright? " you say half joking.
> You almost invoke a reaction that you assume was an ' implying we already don't ' face.
" I'm joking of course, but thank you for the escort and the kind words at the stairs, uh.. " it dawns on you that you don't know their names.
> The slit eyed bat winged guard raises a sharp salute, " Prince Anonymous. Safe travels sir."
> You nod, giving up on telling them not to call you a Prince.
> The title reminds you too much that you are married still to Twilight which sends a deep sting in you.
> Time to find your buddy Big Mac.
> You head back down the stairs towards the bar you were at.
> The ground floor is pretty packed with ponies having a good time jumping and dancing to the music.
> PON3 - Wub a Dub Dub: https://youtu.be/Qt3uqa8yBkM
> The good time being had by all brings a smile to your face as you start to search for Big Mac through the smoke and strobing lights.
> You hear Rainbow Dash on a mic yelling 'Louder!'
> Looking over to the stage, sure enough there she is loving the attention.
> She throws up a hoof with another 'Lloouuddeerr!" As she riles up the crowd.
> Throwing your fist up to the music, to mirror her throwing up her hoof catches her attention.
> She smiles ear to ear giving you a big wave from the stage.
> Crazy pone.
> You smile and wave back looking for your friend, that you could have sworn was at this bar.
> Scratching your head you look around.
> He didn't leave did he?
> You weren't gone that long were you?
> You begin to feel bad thinking that Big Mac thought you ditched him.
100/?
(Woo 100 captcha: ffeat)
>>22630302
i love that such a topic came out of my little pony.
captcha sickg
>>22633847
>"Are we there yet?"
"Almost, just a bit further up ahead."
>"What are we going to do this far into the Everfree?"
>You are Anon and today you are taking your son-
"Fishing. What's wrong? I thought you wanted to come with me."
>"Yeah, but I didn't think we would be walking this far!"
"I need to restock on fish somehow."
>"But it stinks."
"Yes it does. Now hurry up. We better catch them before sundown or else we wouldn't be able to get ice cream afterwards."
>You arrive at the small dock by the river and waste no time at all.
> At the very few first hours you already have four fishes.
>You lazily lay against your seat line ready.
>Your colt. Not so much.
>He seems to be trying to untangle his line with his hooves.
>"Ugh... This is taking forever! Is this all you do when you go fishing?"
"Yup. Plus it let's me relax and think about stuff."
>"What kind of stuff?"
"Stuff like 'how am I going to cook this fish as soon as I get home?' kind of stuff."
>"Oh..."
>...
>"Hey dad?
>You grunt in attention.
>"Am I adopted?"
"...What makes you say that?"
>"Well for one you don't look like a stallion"
"That's true."
>And you also got all the working parts too, but you weren't going to tell him that.
>"And all my classmates are saying you're only fattening my mom and me to eat us."
"Now that's a lie."
>"So you won't eat us?"
"Nope, don't eat things that talk back to me."
>Bacon will never be the same...
>"...But I'm still not your son, am I?"
>Okay, where is he getting this?
"Who's been telling you this?"
>"A-Aunt Pinkie. She said mom did something bad... Did I say something wrong?"
>God damn it Pinkie.
>You reach over and ruffle his mane.
"No. Pinkie just talks too much."
>...
"She's right though. I'm not your real dad, but that doesn't mean I can't be your father."
>You lay back down.
"And your mother is still your mother. Even if she did hurt me."
>Can't let your face crack now.
"Besides, I wouldn't know how to quit her if I tried."
>>22633847
>You will never cum inside your step-daughter.
>>22635510
This is the only reason for Flash X Twilight to happen, to divorce the bitch, and marry her and Flash's daughter, the look on their faces when she gets knocked up would be priceless.
>>22635553
The look on their faces when they meet her "boyfriend" for the first time will be priceless or you could fuck both their moms
Something like this
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ApG7CYuq8Pc
>>22634953
> Maybe you should wait a little here for him.
> As big as he is you recall he always breaks the seal before you do.
> With a finger in the air you grab the bartenders attention ordering another drink.
> They're starting to catch up with you.
> But it's a party who cares.
> The whole point is to have fun and mask the pain of... .. to have fun...
> Sighing, you drink your thought away.
> The song comes to its end but Vinyl doesn't miss a beat.
> She is by far one of your favorite in Equestria.
> You enjoy all types of music, but when it comes to fun, and having a good time, overall nothing tops her.
> Celestia knows you could use it.
> While nodding your head to the music, Rainbow sneaks up on you.
> " Anon!!" She grabs on to your waist, her hooves latching around you with a vice like grip.
> Looks like she had a few to drink as well.
"Woah! Hey Dashie. I thought Vinyl was performing tonight, not you. " You smile with your smug sarcasm.
> She delivers a playful jab to the ribs before responding, " I won the raffle!"
"The what now? "
> She rolls her eyes at you, " The whole reason I came here in the first place! I got to meet Soarin, and Spitfire behind stage, and after that I got to be up there with Vinyl Scratch!" She exhales on one of her hooves polishing it against her chest, "Try not to be too jealous Anon."
> Truth be told you actually were a little.
"But... haven't you met them already?" you ask slightly confused
> Her face drops a little, " Anon," her tone suggesting that you should know better, "The more I meet them the more they will obviously see how completely AWESOME I am and the more they'll want to make me a Wonderbolt! DUH!" She says with her light rasp and squeak.
> You pat her head teasingly.
" Obviously Dashie, obviously. "
> She puffs her cheeks at you a little annoyed by your response.
101/?
>>22635610
>Anon what the tartarus?
>you're dating my mom?
Is it a shock that your mother likes to fuuuuck?!
>>22635627
> You are Big Mac
> And crisis averted
> Pinkie was taking Twilight back home as you made your way back in.
> That was every kind of uncomfortable, but you would do it again, and better, for Anon.
> Unfortunately, you had to tell Pinkie why it was important to take Twilight home, which means it's only a matter of time before every pony knows.
> You had to explain to her that Twilight was caught by Anon in the act of... well.. cheating.
> That's all you really know, and you don't want to know any more.
> You never got involved in these sort of things for this exact reason, but Anon was your exception.
> Truly you wanted to feel bad for Twilight, but you couldn't find a piece of sympathy for her inside of you knowing what she did, especially who she did it to.
> Honestly you didn't know what the Princess Luna deal was about, but again, you just don't want to know.
> Making your way back in, you spot Dash and Anon at the spot you left.
> They're chatting it up none the wiser.
> You couldn't tell him what he just avoided with Dash there so you decide to not mention anything as you approach.
> " There you are peanut bladder! " Anon says loudly and some what drunkenly.
"E...eyup?" Maybe you missed what they were talking about.
> You assume he thought you were at the rest room, even though you were sure he always had to go before you.
> "I was lookin fer ya Big Mac! An ah foun yah!" He patted your shoulder.
> Hell with Twilight gone now maybe you could enjoy yourself with every pony.
> Dash joins in with a horrible imitation accent, " Well Ah'll be, It's Big Mac! "
"..E...eyup?" You figure you need to catch up on your drinks.
102
>>22635687
> About an hour or so passes while you catch up to their level of intoxication.
> You're all laughing and sharing stories boozed up.
> "An, an then Big Mac realized he kicked, a, a hornets nest from the tree with the apples." Anon is laughing at his own story , "an I never seen this big red manly stallion run, SO FAST. "
> Anon slapped his leg and threw his arm around you laughing at your traumatic story, as inebriated Dash joined him falling down laughing at your expense.
> Hell, even you had to hide your smile.
> You do hate hornets after all.
102.5/?
That's it for tonight, I'm going to work on some different things in the story and try to get some stuff out soon if anyone is still following the story. Like always, I hope it's enjoyed. Night.
>>22622881
Nigga please.
bempo-bumpo
>>22635735
You, Loki, and the Anon responsible for the Street preformer Anon story have my full attention.
>>22637888
Triple
Hmm... I'm tempted to start up on the next portion of the story, but I feel like I should wait until the next thread 'cuz we're so close to autosage.
At least I think we are, I don't really understand autosage.
>>22638548
Want to be see more chirping about your story?
Gib me moar.
>>22638548
Should probably hold it for new bread.
>>22638548
>>22638747
Let's post some pony images then.
>>22638791
>>22638807
Clearly we gotta decide on a good OP image for the next thread.
>>22638828
>>22638841
Okey, what do you suggest?
> The Moonspeak
>>22638859
I'm indifferent, I'm just posting context-appropriate images and trying to find some sort of justification for posting them.
>>22638880
Argh, I just wanted to post some images so we pass the bump limit m8.
>>22638905
I know. I just wanted to direct that somewhere interesting, friend.:^)
>>22638935
>tfw when over half pictures are over 4MB
>true sadness
>>22638964
And we passed the limit, Lorien, any decision?
>>22639004
Clearly it must be drunk pone.
New Thread >>22639072
![[nuclear intensifies].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/3AK2zz8.jpg "[nuclear intensifies]")
