>22
>Live in the state by myself, family deserted me
>Attend community college because parents fucked me for high school, convinced me to drop out at fifteen and then attend continuation high school with no plan.
>Bipolar, but never treated as such: medicated for all kinds of shit. Couldn't think straight or read for most of my teenage years. Only smoked weed to relieve the edge and then acquired a horrible nicotine habit through friends
>Attend a community college that awards grades based on attendance, still received C's from most teachers because I don't hesitate to butt-heads over the patronizing curriculum (Like when an anthropology professor assigns a parody documentary about mermaids without knowing that it's a fictional documentary: how do she have a teaching position?)
>Just angry at everything
>Work ten to twelve hour days with no money put back
>Have to attend useless courses in hopes for a better future
>Wheels spinning out in mud
>Only relief I find is in history
>Living with dirt-bag roommates or foreigners that constantly try to capitalize on the vulnerability of students in their homes (over-charging for rent and harassing me for sex and favors.)
>One more hard year of this before the possibility of transferring to a university.
>Still act nice to people, respecting them more than they respect themselves, for the intent of spreading something positive into the world. >Feel sad because I stopped masturbating to have more energy, but I have no gf and most chicks around here are leeches or mediocre and boring.
Can /lit/ give me the gratification of solidarity?
You want gratification? I mean, your life sounds shitty and all but I have news for you. A lot of people's lives are shitty. You're angry at everyone else instead of being focused on how to improve your situation. I'll think of some book rec's but in the mean time, do some meditating or some shit.
>>8223308
Nice whiny blog post you narcissistic faggot
>>8223322
back at you.
>>8223318
No doubt. I had friends that grew up shooting meth and smoking heroine with parents locked up or missing and then others who lived miserable in a comfortable estate worth millions with the love of two parents and siblings. I've seen the highs and the lows and a lot between. I'm trying to remedy my situation,
>You're angry at everyone else instead of being focused on how to improve your situation.
But you have to realize that not every situation has an immediate remedy. It's really only about catharsis. Shitting on /lit/ is cathartic for me right now. I'm sorry.
>>8223308
Quit being a bitch a focus on the task at hand. Use every moment you can for improvement and stop looking to see how much greener the grass is on the other side.
Also, I'm sure you might have an occasional dumb ass professor, but you sound like one of the kids I used to go to CC with that argued with a professor and was always wrong. If you're butting heads with more than one professor a semester, the problem is with you. Quit being a cunt that thinks you know everything and just learn.
Besides, shit's always more simplified and condensed in community college. It'll get better and Uni and especially when you're in upper-division courses. Gen Ed courses are meant to give you basic knowledge and see if you have interest in the subject. Of course, you wouldn't know that because you have much to learn and are too focused on shit like being happy.
>>8223373
I have good semesters, particularly with my art studies and that's why I'm pursuing a major in that area, as well as with literature. I know of exactly what you described about students that argue with professors, but sometimes it's truthfully a matter of preference and the professors are far more reluctant to yield to that truth rather than decadently assert their authority and credentials. You have certain subjects, like economics, where there are great divides in schools of thought and not one objectively reliable outcome, but you'll have a professor that will try to shovel their bias at you and create parrots and that's basically where I draw the line. Granted, there's probably much of the same at a Uni, but I hadn't realized until recently that you have to tolerate this crap before reaching a Uni as part of the process and unfortunately the GPA is set from things I did years ago.
For a board that gets off on the sentiment of authors, it seems to be severely indignant towards the pain of others.
>self-diagnosed mental illness
Oh just fuck off
>>8223369
>Shitting on /lit/ is cathartic for me right now.
Ha, we've all been there. What about reading something that is a different perspective from your own?
Revolutionary Road - Richard Yates
A Clockwork Orange - Anthony Burgess
One hundred years of Solitude - Gabriela Garcia Marquez
Walden - Henry Thoreau
Sorry to hear about your roommates especially. I found that was the icing on the cake of shit when I was younger. Nothing like having to share your personal space with awful people. Hopefully things will look up soon Anon.
>>8223413
Actually, I was clinically diagnosed for variations of OCD, ADHD, and mild psychosis while institutionalized, but it wasn't until I saw a proper psychiatrist that the symptoms were recognized and medication was applied properly. That's what I meant when I said "medicated for all kinds of shit" but I suppose I should have clarified.
>>8223412
Well, if I can give you one piece of advice it would be: Focus on you and improving yourself. It falls within the "build it and they will come." I was a loser four years ago. Attractive and intelligent, but not doing shit and slowly degrading (post military service). Eventually I went to community college and started getting /fit/ as fuck then absorbed myself in my field (writing, theatre). Eventually girls of value started going out of their way to come to me and I connected with an awesome and close group of friends that are all excellent people and going to be successful, honest individuals. If your field is art, get good at art, and start taking care of yourself. Exercise does wonders for the mind just as the body. Then fall into the community on campus at Uni and find a circle. Don't be afraid to be outgoing. You just gotta suck that shit up right now and deal with the hard times. I did that in war as a grunt and post war dealing with my own problems. Eventually I reached the place I am now which is happiness by focusing on progress and improvement.
Also,
> For a board that gets off on the sentiment of authors, it seems to be severely indignant towards the pain of others.
Nah, you just admitted you were shitposting and you were kind of whiny. I'm not getting off by being rough. It's tough love, anon.
>>8223308
Hang in there OP, on the bright side you arent to far from UNI. I'm 19 and still cant get into college because I dropped out of my high school. I stay shut in all day because I have no idea what Im doing or what to do. Your not the only one going through tough times.
>>8223412
You're right, people here are mostly immature or do not fully understand what they read.
Sounds like you're having a tough time, it must be pretty shitty dealing with some bad professors, roommates, parents, etc. Life is a constant flow of one problem to the next, with occasional breathing room.
During my undergrad at a big state uni, I had an anthropology professor argue with me that humans were the only animal to use tools. I was like, actually new research shows chimps making simple spears and hunting bush babies. He was like, no that's not true.
So I contacted the actual researchers and they sent me their research, which I forwarded to him.
Not everyone has integrity or upholds what they preach, but I like the fact that you make an effort to treat others well and aim to bring goodness into the world.
You sound alright by my book, I hope that things improve for you soon, you deserve better.
>>8223483
Try to get your GED and go the community college route.
>>8223526
It's an issue of free will. I actually started a thread about that on here lol
