>>7874373
good luck with that hemorrhoid

>>7874373
oh! i forgot to mention:

>fell over because legs asleep
>rendered powerless on floor as large negroes entered the washroom

>>7874373
Yeah I aways end up spending more time reading or on my phone than taking a shit.

No it's fucking amazing

I like to sway autistically back and forth, which apparently the Unabomber also did and I'm currently thinking about that a little bit, but you can do it really well on the toilet. It zens me the fuck out and I get that Csikszentmihalyi "flow" thing. Tunnel a hole right through Everyman's Plutarch 26 minutes after the last shit came out of my ass. Gotta wipe strategically though so you're not just sitting there with free-drying shit on your asshole man. Wipe it away, keep reading. Spend the whole day in the toilet. Super bad idea though in the long run, gives you hemorrhoids like fucking crazy. I know you think you can't get hemorrhoids because you're probably like 22 or some shit, but I was your age just a few years ago and felt invincible too, and trust me, you're like three or four years away from "shit permanently breaks" mode. 22 year old invincibility mode doesn't last forever. Some stupid habit you cultivated in your youth and meant to fix "in the future" just creeps up on you, your asshole partially falls out while you're on the toilet, and boom, you're got dangly ass parts for the rest of your goddamn life.

So all in all I say get a rocking chair. I picked one up from the street curb and it seems to work for me. But I do agree with you. Something about leaning forward on the toilet, and optionally swaying autistically, really activates all my neurons or something. What we ideally need is some kind of FORWARD rocking chair where you are basically in a shitting pose, but one that doesn't constantly strain your anus muscles and give you fucking hemorrhoids by the time you hit your mid-twenties like me. Seriously be careful about that man.

>>7874404
This is a very well-informed post.

>>7874389
oh yeah, the legs asleep from the elbows on them

>>7874404
>shit permanently breaks mode

This is real. My broke my wrist at 21 and it healed up after a year. Then I busted some ribs at 22 and they click like crazy now and cause me pain. I also fucked my shoulder 2 years ago and it's still not 100%. I never had any sort of injury before I was 21. Feels bad man. I want to go back to bouncy baby mode

>>7874404
Rocking back and forth also helps if you're constipated.

A lot of my reading is done on the toilet. Comfy as fuck and it's the most quiet place in the house. I feel I'm in my own world on the can and it's awesome.

>>7874386
I had one bc of what the op is talking about. had it surgically removed. it sucks. taking a shit for a few days after feels like a knife blade sliding out and slicing your asshole up. but honestly it gets to a point where it's worth getting it removed versus living with it.

>>7874373
I did this as a kid. No haemorrhoids, but pins and needles from hell.

I tried to shit and read at uni. Once my sphincter stopped contracting, I got off the dirty seat. The smell of methane isn't conductive to reading.

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>>7874373

>>7874404
>Gotta wipe strategically though so you're not just sitting there with free-drying shit on your asshole man
my life