Honk if you are horny! Edition
*honks*
*honk*
pomf =3
chucklevision
*puts paw on horn*
toot toot
hehe
*honk honk*
>>57014316
haha *honk*
business idea: change /brit/ to \brit\
in a pickle lads, need a way out
>be neet
>work coach calls potential employer
>employer calls me
>sperg out and don't answer it
>email work coach saying I missed their call
>he says to call them back tomorrow
>don't call them back
>they call me
>ask if I can be there for an interview
>within the hour
>no fucking way
>tell her to make it after the weekend
>monday
>don't go
>no reminder phone call
>no call from work coach
>appointment with work coach tomorrow
>if he knows I skipped an interview, I'll get sanctioned
What should I tell him?
I know that he knows they called me. He must think that it was to arrange an interview.
If I say that it wasn't, then there's a chance he'll call them to ask why and they'll tell him that they did and I didn't attend.
Need a foolproof way out.
Doing a (sloppy, smelly) poo.
there is more chance of A happening therefore B is irrelevant
>>57014409
devilish
Loyalists are marching outside my flat again lads
>>57014409
\tirb\
wew lots of horny lads in here tonight
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W-5ArXBkINk
>tfw so sexually removed I've never even dreamt about having sex
>>57014432
Gun em down
>>57014422
didnt read lol
>>57014422
>interview on a bank holiday
Tell him it was haram and to reschedule.
>>57014433
More like \trilby\
Need to become a millionaire by next year lads
>>57014432
ah yes very nice
>>57014422
Haha, lazy neet cunt, I hope you get your bennies cut
>>57014432
cunts
>>57014457
I've never had sex but I've had sexual dreams. I don't recall ever having true sex in a dream, but I've definitely 'done' sexual things in dreams. Usually wake up covered in sperm the moment things become sexual in the dream.
>>57014457
same
when i see a fit girl i don't imagine myself having sex with her, i imagine wanking to porn of her
>>57014482
its a public holiday not a bank holiday.
>>57014432
Why are they called Loyalists?
Fairly new right-wing youtuber, lads: https://www.youtube.com/user/TokyoAtomic
Pretty good. So much better than the fedora fucks amazing atheist, sargon and thunderfoot. Pigeon man comes close to Pat condell in terms of quality
>>57014490
get daddy to give you money.
>>57014509
fit girls don't even talk to me in my dreams they all ignore me
just like real life lmao
clean
clean
cleaning my ears
Going to an interview in an hour, lads. Want to make a good impression but the interviewer is a proper thicc lass I'm going to be having lewd thoughts about the entire time. I worry it'll make me over-confident.
>>57014457
>tfw the closest thing I've ever had to a sex dream was just me masturbating to porn
>>57014510
Semantics.
>>57014526
lotta loyalty for a hired /brit/
>>57014508
That's really hot, I've never had a wet dream before.
>>57014540
Ah yes, a small loan will do nicely
>>57014457
I've had sex about 20 times and maybe enjoyed it once. I've ended up just walking out partway through because I wasn't interested and even turned down free and willing sex!
How fucked is that!
>>57014457
I've only ever had 1 sex dream, like 8 years ago
Was getting a footjob off a chubby Inuit lookin girl
Was okay
>>57014509
>>57014542
>tfw on tinder you literally don't even match with really cute girls because you know you'll waste one of your swipe rights and they will not ever swipe right on you
;_;
>>57014457
Whenever I stop wanking I realise I'm in dreams and then I'll shag the nearest thing I see.
It's fucking great honestly. Much better than masturbation because it actually feels as though you're shagging these people.
>>57014566
FOB
>>57014457
my only sex dream was one where i got molested by my ugly primary school music teacher
actually found it pretty hot at the time for some reason
>Finally start to get a couple of followers going on Instagram
>Hopes of building a solid fanbase ruined now because they change the algorithm so all the big boys consolidate their power
Fuck sake, I was hoping to get big enough to have companies send me free shit and stuff
Hello '''''''lads''''''''
Back from lunch desu
>>57014640
how the fuck does that work
>>57014640
>2(two) followers
your mum and dad don't count
how is white phosphorus not a chemical weapon
Looking for one of these for my new car. What do you think?
>>57014432
You can't be that stupid surely?
>>57014482
it was last week
going to bed, good night
>>57014623
Was she old?
>>57014640
Great ambition.
fucking s m h
>Just kick me in the third-eye with a steel-toecap boot pham
>>57014316
*honks really loud*
toot toot
>>57014693
Because it's a river in Turkey
>>57014708
Tell them you had an anxiety attack and are going to see your doctor about treatment for PTSD caused by the department of work & pensions.
>>57014716
good afternoon
>>57014696
a) ugly.
b) definitely a women's car.
>>57014699
what are you even trying to do
>>57014699
What a shithole
>>57014696
gud choice but they are a bit unreliable
>>57014316
xcbxc
>>57014718
yeah must have been late 30s, had never found her attractive
>>57014764
Find out which building he's in and give the owners a call
>>57014699
Oh no I'm so scared
>>57014765
t. billionaire
>>57014761
/o/ always say get a miata (mx5) but that's more of a women's/gayer car desu.
>>57014672
>Be an attractive, rich white girl
>go on holiday several times a year
>post pictures of holidays on instagram
>get followed by other rich white girls and pervy middle-eastern/indian men
>companies give you free shit/pay you to advertise their products in front of your followers
>>57014699
yeah let me just rush down to lurgan to harass this anime board poster
watchin the airforce flying over lads
>>57014777
mashi y 3am
>>57014808
Get a WV Sirocco or a Volvo c30 pham
>>57014808
>/o/
>listening to a bunch of 16 year old epic /b/ro yanks
>>57014751
that's pretty close to the truth
I took a few pills to calm down
if I'd have driven there, I would have killed somebody
Somehow I don't think they'll see it in my favour
>>57014887
alri Egypt want some attention?
>>57014600
Tinder is shit anyway
I don't know how they sort who to show, but I have my ig on my tinder, and I get a few girls I would definitely swipe right to DMing me on ig, but they never show up on my list
Shit is fucked
>>57014901
>WV
wat
https://youtu.be/dsBO2q7NHGM
Howling at this
what are those fucking conveyor belt stairs called that only fat people use in shopping centres and airports?
can't think of it no matter how hard I try
>>57014901
>hatchbacks
Vile
>>57014699
ah yes, nice backtrace my good sir
>>57014887
t. tutakhamun
When will the mongols militarise again and save us from the muslim hordes with their hordes
Lads
honk
>>57014946
oopsy
>>57014950
fuck off family ;^)
>>57014984
fuck off billionaire
>>57014563
Yeah they can be pretty hot and enjoyable 2bh. The last one I had (a long while ago now) was where I was in a room with an older woman and she had a black skirt and black tights on and, for whatever reason, she was deliberately making me horny and making me hump her thighs. Ended up cumming all over her tights (and my duvet).
Malcolm X was an anti-white anti-jew demagogue until he did the Hajj and decided that islam was the best way to combat racism, as he saw muslims of all colours coming together
50 years later, and the Saudis blamed black people for the crowd collapse that killed 1400 people
Silly Malcolm, the biggest racists of all were your new muslim friends, not the whites
>>57014949
Travelators
>>57014938
please colonize us again
>>57014939
tinder uses a default "blend" search option with the free version. It says it is scientifically more likely to get you matches. It obviously just records swipe right v swipe left in the parameter of the amount of swipes received to give a percentage whereby that percentage is run side by side girls with the same percentage. As it goes, it might get more intelligent in terms of finding common interest pages or perhaps even hair colour and shit but from the get go that's obviously how it operates. Hence why when i did it, all I got after a certain period were absolute pigs. I had the same swipe ratio as they did kek.
>>57014600
>having tinder
normie prick
I think my mum is going to give me 'the talk' again at some point later today. Their is a toxic atmosphere in the air that usually precedes these things.
>>57015053
are you christian?
>>57015053
k coming now x
>>57014947
Imagine actually thinking like this
>everyone who isn't alt-right is a leftist
Ahh yes very impressive
>>57014984
>loaf
so not a roll/bun then
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YH2nUoDLhL8
HEY guys, have you CHECKED OUT this new VIDEO?
>>57014947
>normalfags posting shit memes on Twitter
wew
TIOCFAIDH ÁR LÁ
OOH AAH UP THE 'RA
>>57015038
>Silly Malcolm, the biggest racists of all were your new muslim friends, not the whites
why not both?
>>57015038
It shows how, no matter how smart or eloquent you are, until you've really seen what you're talking about you're probably naive and being manipulated. Malcom X was very intelligent and eloquent, but spent most of his life being manipulated by Elijah Mohammad and his last few years being manipulated by Saudis.
>>57015038
Malcolm told blacks in America to go back to Africa
>>57015076
What does the talk involve?
>>57015103
can someone explain why this guy talks like that
it's no accent i've heard before
>>57015155
It's an attempt at an Atlantic accent by an Irishman.
>>57014316
honk honk
what video games are you lads playing these days
>>57014928
say you got lost on the way there
or your car broke down
>>57015078
Copt. Yes.
Are you atheist?
>>57015090
Please rape as much women as possible. We need as much Superior white genes in our genepool as possible.
>>57015103
>59 minutes
surely this is against universal preferable behaviour
>>57015103
Who the fuck is this creepy hat-man?
>>57015103
NOT an ARGUMENT
>>57015103
Love how Molyneux went from libertarian to neo-nazi fascist who wants to kill all pakis
![180px-Feel_Guy[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/SmLcwzv.jpg "180px-Feel_Guy[1].jpg")
>>57015196
gf simulator
LYYYYYYIIN TED CROOZE
>>57015152
>"you can't keep going on like this"
>"it's time to move on in life"
>"you're [age] now. Other people your age have jobs and have moved out by now to get on in life"
>"you can't stay in this room forever"
>"I can't deal with you living here anymore"
>"maybe you should see the doctor again"
General complaints about harbouring a NEET manchild.
Just joking but this cannot go well can it?
>>57015196
feeling like giving myself ptsd so red orchestra 2 and verdun at the moment
came twice
now off to buy milk and pot noodle
>>57015266
fuck man just keep your head down, nod and agree.
>>57015271
>monkey emoji
Has the implications of racism desu
>>57015266
Ah yes, very familiar.
>>57015271
why would you say that
>>57015271
You'll be getting a knock on your door by the rozzers any minute now
>>57014563
I've had sex dreams with Natalie Portman and Keira Knightley. They were riding me in both instances.
>Work in 18 hours
>>57015271
keep the conversation going
>>57015374
I guess you have a type then.
>>57015393
literally afraid to look at tinder now lmao
Lads, the storm blew down some scaffolding onto waitrose and iceland. Cant eat. Send help,
>>57014508
>Usually wake up covered in sperm the moment things become sexual in the dream.
>insert penis in vagina
>wake up to my penis just unloading in my boxers
Worst feeling in the world
>>57015379
pls don't do this.
Who here /findom/
>>57014947
I still don't fully understand what Alt-Right is. Are they just neo-nazis that don't call themselves neo-nazis?
A lot of their less radical opinions seem to be regular, traditionalist conservative opinions, just call yourself a traditionalist conservative or something.
>>57014984
It's a barm, you muslim.
>>57015435
Sent ;)
>>57014457
I used to have dreams about sex but nowadays the best I can get is dreams in which I find extra hot porn and wank off to it.
>>57015465
>all questions marked by (*) are required
>no questions at all
:/
Getting a haircut tomorrow lads, £40
Got a butt plug in lads.
>>57015508
literal billionaire
>>57015482
Good lad. Cant even get to Greggs
>>57015415
Unattainable supermodels? Yeah.
>>57015508
For your wedding or why is it so expensive?
>>57015428
fuking keep us updated man i want to see
>>57014947
>and then there's a cartoon of what looks like an alien lizard... holding in front of... like a mason...
>a stereotypical badger holding a handburger
Jesus Christ. When you put into perspective shit like that and say it out loud, it sounds fucking hilarious.
>>57015553
Keira and Natalie look incredibly similar too.
>>57015508
Who the fuck pays £40 for a haircut? Bet youre getting all that extra shit too, you ponce.
lads just saw my ex commenting on someones post on FB
why is this bothering me more than when I actually saw her in person last weekend
Molyneux is scaring me, lads...
>>57015508
To be fair, the only time I have ever had a haircut that I was 100% completely satisfied with was when I had it cut at a professional salon. Some trainee hairdresser approached me on the street when I had long hair and asked if I would come in for a free haircut and I said yeah.
But it was by far the best haircut I have ever had by a long way. I can understand why people who have the money fork out for professional cuts.
>>57015559
>Denmark
>>57015585
Scalp massage included 2bh
>>57015603
Molyneaux is pretty based desu. Quite biased though.
LADS TURN ON BBC THEY ARE MAKING BANTER ILLEGAL
>>57015603
>1 hour 28 minutes on the truth about Donald drumpf
Fucking hell, so much autism
>>57015621
fob
>>57015621
faggot 2bh
>>57015603
>watching stefan "kill your parents" molyneux
>>57015603
He loves the sound of his own voice. 1 hour videos for a 1 minute point.
>>57015579
One could even be the body guard for the other.
>>57015621
>scalp massage
here in australia you are whats called a fucking softcock
B:/ Shut down/Depression
>>57015689
Just being thorough
>>57015271
>breaking the ice with race banter
TOP KEK post reply if not unmatched
https://youtu.be/CUoZBfz7r0U
The man is literally insane
>>57015717
You're lying if you say you don't enjoy having your hair washed and your scalp massaged by a qt3.14 hairdresser. Or you're a bender.
>>57015603
I love how little views his videos are getting now that he's started to be racist as fuck for no reason
Sargon of Akkad has far less subscribers than that, but because he's not just racist for the sake of being racist and actually backs up his points with evidence, you'll find his videos are doing much better.
>>57015603
literally nothing but clickbait
Poleaboo is watching Top Gear in Syria though he isn't a fan of the show
Why are Australian girls so good looking, while British girls are ugly, when Australians are descendants of Brits?
>>57015717
enjoy your shit leb haircuts while i'll be sitting in a comfy chair getting a scalp massage and drinking a yank IPA
MANS NEVER BEEN IN A MARCIE WHEN IT'S SHUTDOWN
TRUST ME DADDIIIIIII
>>57015752
t. trust fund babby
She will never be mine
JDIMSA
>>57015757
inbreeding
>>57015757
who's she
>>57015757
lol
>>57015757
vikings took all our fit birds
>>57015757
i guess in aus the week fatties got beaten to death by kangaroos etc when they first went over whereas here they were encouraged to breed by being given benefits
>>57015762
t. index fund teen
>>57015466
It's basically /pol/ shite
Take a look at this https://twitter.com/search?q=%23AltRight&src=typd
>>57015564
>>57015729
she has sent me two messages since so I assume she's mad as fuck or unmatched me after sending them
literally haven't opened the app since
>join a 3v3 game
>half way through I start losing to my opposite number
>both teamates call me a noob and leave the game
>>57015745
>>57015762
yeah, well when her tits press against your heads its pretty nice but i dont give a fuck about my scalp
>>57015772
not saying i disagree with him but those thumbnails+titles are alex jones tier
>>57015836
Open the app you fucking ponce.
Whats she gonna do? Punch you through the screen?
>>57015854
t. hedge fund young adult
>>57015836
Check it you melt
>>57015757
I have an ugly wife but only for the banter
>>57015866
guardian police are tracking him right now
>>57015848
>>I don't care about my scalp! t. hard cunt
m8 there is nothing wrong with enjoying a scalp massage.
>>57015844
>play with friends
>call the other team noobs if you're winning and nerds if you're losing
>having a jolly good time
>>57015836
OPEN IT MAN
>>57015748
Sargon gets mad at this stuff
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RrBPN3Lybeg
LOL
>>57015905
t. mutual fund geriatric
>>57015923
not enjoying this meme desu
>>57015897
when did everyone become so proud of being a soft shite?
david beckham and his metrosexuality did this
>>57015897
>>>m8 there is nothing wrong with enjoying a scalp massage.
>>>enjoying scalp massage
faggot
>>57015866
>>57015872
>>57015907
Alright, here
Should I just say I was joking now?
>>57015757
Still trying to figure that one out myself 2bh
>>57015939
t. ISA fund immortal
>>57015912
That little fuck pisses me off too desu
>>57015939
i find it pretty funny 2bh
>>57015968
She's being more patient with you than I'd be
Reckon you're well in there
>>57015968
whatever you do from this moment on you're fucked, so just go in hard
>>57015603
>Free Will vs. Determinism: What they wont tell you!
Love that one desu. Really shows how stupid Stefan is.
>>57015912
Sargon's getting handsomer and handsomer.
>>57015968
CHEEKY
H
E
E
K
Y
Just say you where joking lad and say he looks cute or something
>>57015968
Cant think of anything witty 2bh.
>>57016009
t. investment fund toddler
>>57015968
ask her if she likes being called nigger during sex
>>57015968
"just you :)"
>>57016039
How so?
>>57015968
reply with another 3 monkey emojis
>>57015968
3/5ths compromise
>all this pandering to twittertwat
am I on ladbible right now
>>57015968
Say something about whips and chains.
>>57015968
say "one's enough" with a monkey
>>57015968
>>57016043
She knows he's fucking joking you autist
If you go and say 'I was only kidding please continue replying haha dont get offended because i was only joking haha' her pussy will dry up so fucking fast
>>57016085
holy kek
Since starting cutting Poleaboo has been masturbating to trans vids far more regularly
He thinks it may be affecting him because he no longer has the same interest in girls he sees in the street, even if theyre Polish. He thinks his tastes are beginning to change
>>57015968
You are that 1 in 10000 nigger.
>>57016149
thought you would have gone to trannies months ago
whats with all the honking in here?!? =P
>>57015968
extract nudes
>>57016149
stop, you are just too weird for life
>>57016160
that's just straight up racism though
>>57016189
*gently squeezes your nose and makes a honking noise*
:D
>>57016180
Poleaboo has always had slight interest in non-hetero pornography, but its only in the last 1-2 months that he has begun to watch it regularly
NOT an argument
>>57016204
fuck off nigger
>>57015968
"well you count as 20 ;)" and a monkey
>>57015974
Is Norwegian heritage the new 1/32 latino/brazilian/caribian/[insert exotic country]?
>>57016204
quote from django unchained
>>57016224
>literally makes a living talking about pseudophilosophy for 8 hours a day
youtube was a mistake
>>57016224
Kek didn't realise the meme was real
>>57016272
not an argument
>>57015968
Ask her if she likes Kanye West
If she says no, tell her to listen to College Dropout and rethink her statement desu
>>57016283
its not fun to argument semantics
>>57016224
Fuck off with the big words chris malloy you twat.
>>57016272
False equivalence
>>57016195
Poleaboo wonders why you hate him
but then seeing as pigskins hate everything, he is not surprised that theyre homophobic too
>>57016254
literally always was
>>57015968
Say "Only the cute ones, so just 2 atm."
>>57016316
not an argument
>>57016319
not an argument
>>57016254
It is? I've only seen it on her's 2bh. That probably is the case, though. In her example I know she's just got an English dad and an American mother who also had predominantly English ancestry, which honestly I can buy because of her tits.
>>57015748
he is 1/4 nigger, of course he is not going to be racist
>>57016342
or "so just you" would probably be better instead of 2 ngl
Copped out lads
