Are spiders really that bad in Australia?
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Are spiders really that bad in Australia?
>Yes it ruined my life mate
>>56759693
I've wondered this too. It's just a meme, right?
In the corners and crevices of my room, I sometimes hear them scuttling around, and occasionally if a fly or something gets caught in their webs (around and under my windows, and behind the closet and chest of drawers), then I can always hear the death agonies of the creature buzzing around while it's being eaten alive
I've tried using a vacuum cleaner to suck up the spiders with their webs, but they always come back, and it's very hard to get them once they retreat to their little hidey-holes, which they've learned to do as soon as they hear the vacuum cleaner turn on
it's ok though, they've never bitten me, and even when they occasionally get bolder and try scuttling around my floor and on my desk, I can generally scare them away by shouting and banging pots together - if I tried to pick them up and throw them outside or something like that, I'd probably get bitten, so I don't take the risk since the spiders in my room are the fairly small ones, so they're almost certainly extremely venomous
I'm not that scared of them, but sometimes I can hear them at night making that spooky clicking noise and screeching at each other, so that puts me on edge a bit
>>56759891
Yeah, I used to live in a small flat and there was spiders living in the wall just behind where my head was when I was in bed. All fucking night just clicking and screeching, almost drove me nuts.
>>56759917
>>56759891
They don't click and screech in Tasmania
>>56759938
You probably wouldn't hear them with your second head talking all the time
>>56759693
Why spider bad?
>>56759967
>those fingers
start the reactor
>>56759967
>>56760010
Almost reminds of that anon with the alien fingers.
>>56759891
>>56759917
>Spiders Legs are so fucking big you can hear them clicking and screeching at night
Nigger i will NEVER visit Australia
>>56760118
It's not from their legs it's from their mouths (or whatever)
>Friend visits Australia in December
>Which is apparently summer in that part of the world
>He stays with his aunt and uncle in the outback
>Some days got so hot the spiders would try get into the house for shade
>He would spend all day defending the home from huge spiders using only a broomstick
>He is now extremely paranoid about spiders invading his home
>>56760118
they're clicking their fangs to intimidate each other
>>56760137
Fucking Hell
Imagine one of those Things crawling on you at night,did that ever happen to you?
>>56760208
So basically Spiders are the Representation of Niggers in Australia?
>driving home from work late at night
>need to stop in a dodgy servo for some petrol
>get out and see a big cunt of a spider on car roof
>grab my shoe
>spider has vanished in the split second I took to grab my shoe
>have to drive home with a teleporting spider somewhere in my car
>2 hour trip
>>56759891
You've only got the little funnelwebs down there in tassie though.
They're practically kittens.
>>56760236
what brings about that analogy? I wouldn't really know what niggers are like (we don't have them in straya, although we do have chinks in the cities)
>>56760236
No those are abos.
>>56760281
>Annoying as Hell
>Disgusting
>Always trying to intimidate each other
>Often very hairy
Spiders are a lot more intelligent of course,but they do have some things in common,dont you think?
>>56760118
>you can HEAR spiders
>you can't make it stop
>there's nothing stopping a huge spider from losing his mind and landing on our face when you sleep or dropping its babies in your shoes
>>56760213
Yeah happened a few times a year
>>56760344
spiders aren't that annoying, and they keep to themselves unless you disturb them or try to get rid of them, so I wouldn't really compare them to niggers
>>56760275
when did I say I was a filthy two-head?
>>56760361
Was it a big one? How did you kill him? Did he defend himself?
>>56760375
Just catch him and put him outside they eat the other pests
>>56760415
this only works if they're one of the larger, more harmless ones
I wouldn't risk it if they were little, more toxic ones - plenty of people die from slightly fumbling trying to catch those
better to just use a vacuum cleaner, then burn the bag
>>56760415
>You have to take big ass spiders in your Hand and throw them outside from time to time
Australia is brutal. But i guess you were raised with that shit.
>>56760455
They don't bite if you whistle
>>56760475
You have to whistle to the Spiders? Is that some old Abo Trick?
>>56759693
Thats just a tiny snake, the spider is only around the size of your hand.
>>56760502
No, you whistle to yourself so you can not think about getting bit
>>56760548
Well,youre still alive, so i guess it works.
>>56760281
we have sudanese (at least in my area we do)
>>56760692
>melbourne
>>56760736
not that guy but im from Bris and there are shit tones here too.
>>56760281
>
https://au.news.yahoo.com/vic/a/31093914/victorian-police-crack-down-on-notorious-apex-gang-responsible-for-moomba-city-rampage/
http://www.theage.com.au/victoria/it-did-surprise-us-victoria-police-admit-being-caught-out-by-gang-fight-in-melbourne-cbd-20160313-gni0vy.html
http://www.theage.com.au/news/national/remote-sites-used-for-jihad-training/2005/11/14/1131951100212.html
oi don't step here mate ill nip ya
but how are the antivenom supplies? How often do people die for want of proper treatment?
It actually makes you respect the abos, that they've stayed alive all this time. To look at them and hear them, they don't seem able, but they are.
No but the melanoma is.
>>56760815
There hasn't been a death by spider bite since 1979
>>56760849
yep, I'll take spiders over bears any day
Could one of you Aussies make a Vocaroo of himself saying some stupid shit in an Australian Accent?
>>56760271
lmao
>car trip with dad, friend and friend's dad
>5mins in, huntsman goes scuttling across friend's dads leg
>everyone freaks out jumping around trying to avoid/squash it
>it has disappeared completely
>very uncomfortable 2hr drive
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0gHrg45ADO3
>>56760938
>>56760967
http://vocaroo.com/i/s11lilTGMOCI
>>56760213
last time it happened to me I felt something brushing my face and rubbed it off and then it landed on my arm and started running
>went from sleeping to fight or flight in half a second
>>56759891
That's how it was when I lived in germany.
Somehow, some giant species of spider was living in my walls, so I'd constantly find these massive spiders chilling in the corners of my room.
>>56761000
Hey Tim, what's happening?
>>56760967
>>56761000
Kingz of Shitpostin
>>56761030
Idk who tim is lad just clearing my throat
>>56761045
apologies
Just baked this fresh OC for you lads.
R8 it
>>56760188
That's pretty damn funny. In summer at my work, around about the end of spring, a whole bunch of beetles start dying when it gets hot, and they seek refuge inside the warehouse. Then the blue-tongue lizards start coming inside to nom on them. We probably get half a dozen lost lizards in each warehouse every year.
If I can't catch them in a box, I'll just chase them out with a broom. Every five or so feet they get distracted from running away by a tasty, tasty bug though.
these are the worst things about australia. i fucking hate them
>>56761181
Frogs? Is that really Australias biggest Issue?
>>56761203
cane toads. they are poisonous and breed like wilderbeasts and they stink. i used to go hunting for them with a cricket bat or golf club. they are like rocks so its tough to kill them
>>56761181
Worst of all, they were introduced for no fucking reason. Their march across Northern Territory has apparently been slowed down though, as crows, magpies, and feral cats are cottoning on to ways of killing them.
>>56761203
Cane Toads
They are a pest that isn't native to this country
>>56761224
well thats good to know. i havent seen them in a while due to living in the suburbs but there were so many at my dads property, they owned the place. they lived in our kitchen at night time. it was horrible
>>56761181
>>56761221
Is it true that Aussie teens lick cane toads to get high?
>>56759891
>>56759917
fuck this, how can you ever have a moment of peace
>>56761276
what ive heard i just presume is anecdotal as the cane toads here wouldnt get you high as they dont produce 5-MeO-DMT. the colorado river toad produces this substance though
These little bastards right here are MEAN
And, unlike the European bumblebee, there guys can be about an inch in length, NOT including the stinger.
And then we also get inch-long cockroaches here that live in everyone's houses. Ran into one crawling on the wall yesterday as I turned on the lights but I knew that if I went to go grab roach spray he'd escape so I caught him with my bare hands and sent him on a plane back home to Turkey.
Jokes aside, I actually did recently catch one of those monsters with my bare hands and flush him down the toilet.
>>56761276
Not just people, they're turning our pets into junkies too!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f6kKYO9AU4k
>>56761203
watch this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=azQnClq--RU
>>56761353
lel
Dobby's trippin balls
These are spiders that we see pretty often here in Georgia. Most here call them "banana spiders", but they're actually Yellow Garden Spiders.
There's one living in my backyard right now.
I also have a few black widows living in my home.
I like to keep the widows around because they're REALLY good at keeping other pests out. Between my cat and the widow spiders, my home is almost 100% pest-free.
And thanks to pic related (though that's not my photo), my backyard is too!
>>56760275
I was the Tasmanian and I'm pretty sure we don't get funnel webs. We get White tails and Red tails though
>>56761027
They are called Hausspinne (domestic house spider)
They are harmless though fast as fuck and will eat flies for you
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gJ05LgB_ECk
>>56761357
nice allegory for the immigration in europe. the arabs even look like cane toads
For a less creepy twist, these guys occasionally show up here in Georgia.
They're super adorable, but they're also huge.
>>56761506
Yeah. I realized that they did a great job keeping the house pest free, so whenever my sister would freak out about the spiders and want someone to kill them, I'd simply take them and release them in my room instead. My sister had all the mosquitos in her room in the summer, and I was living /comfy/.
I wonder why?
>>56761506
thats just like our huntsman spider they are harmless although huge and they just chill in ya house and eat bugs
>>56761571
>For a less creepy twist, these guys occasionally show up here in Georgia.
>They're super adorable, but they're also huge.
Very nice colour.
In the NT we'd get the Atlas or Hercules moths which are a similar shape that would come hanging around the lights at night and they're amazing beasts
>>56761440
I'm from Georgia and have literally never seen that thing. I'd say this is the most common spider I've seen in my neck of the woods.
These fuckers build some strong webs.
>>56761591
Honestly, that's how the black widows are here.
Their bites are dangerous, of course, but they're super chill and really useful to keep around.
If you have one in your house, relocate it to your kitchen window. That's the ideal location for a black widow. From there, she'l protect you and your cupboard from roaches and moths.
>>56761533
toppest of keks
>one male and one female is more than sufficient to populatate top end of the northern territory
>the best thing is the get rid of them, get a stick and hit them with it
>when im driving a car i have no hesitation of running them over whatsoever
and then the leftist
>i couldnt do without them, they're friends
>>56761814
>NO ONE HAS ANY RIGHT TO FEAR THEM
too coincidental
![Mastigoproctus_giganteus_0004_L.D[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/piYv9zR.jpg "Mastigoproctus giganteus 0004 L.D[1]")
>>56761611
Damnit. Your insect is bigger again.
I'm pulling all the stops, now.
Have you ever seen either of these?
We have both pic related AND video related here in America, though the specific example in the video is in africa, we have avery similar one in New Mexico here.
They're spooky fuggers, I tell ya what.
They're called vinegaroons because they shoot acetic+lactic acid at stuff they don't like.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4CMXEz6mxZo
>>56761898
Better example
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWSIYlIag6w
>>56759891
>I'm not that scared of them, but sometimes I can hear them at night making that spooky clicking noise and screeching at each other, so that puts me on edge a bit
I-is this true
or is this just another Drop Bears bullshit
>>56761943
Good jesus
not really
only time I kind of got fucked by one was when I was playing outside with my sister and had my hand near a bush, after I looked down at my hand there was a huge black spider on it and my mother came out and killed it then rushed me to hospital after hearing my sister scream. I was in a slinky for a week after that
>MFW my house is filled with big huntsmen
>MFW they have a fucking social hierarchy
>MFW hearing two of the big males fighting and the fucking clicking and hissing noises
I feel like I'm a guest in their home some times
>MFW cucked by spiders
>>56762058
Seriously? This thing can't be any different than a huntsman to you.
I'll admit I've never encountered one of those guys (they're in the west), but I did stumble upon a giant birdeating spider when I was four (It was someone's pet) and it walked on my arm and face before leaving me alone.
These are the scariest things in my area, even though they're harmless it's freaky seeing one in motion They look much bigger when flying around than they really are. There's black widows and brown recluses but you have to go out of your way to find them.
>>56761349
>live in brussels
>smoking a cig out of my window yesterday during the happening
>have radio on and know what's up
>don't care because arabs have to blow up sometimes
>a bumblebee very slowly flies towards me
>barely ever dealt with insects
>freeze and hope the smoke will scare it away
>it flies into my room
>lay down on bed and fall asleep hoping it will eventually get out
Fuck insects.
>>56762200
Huntsman is like a 8 legged dog
http://www.theguardian.com/environment/2015/nov/26/youre-dead-police-thought-man-trying-to-kill-spider-was-attacking-wife?CMP=soc_567
Fuck Huntsman.
>>56761349
>>56762236
I thought bumble bees were harmless. They're cute not spooky. I used to play with them a lot when I was younger, never knew they were even capable of stinging. If you want to kill one use a wiffle ball bat, it gives you a very satisfying thwack when you connect and they go flying. But don't actually kill them because the population is declining severely.
>>56762236
hey don't fuck with bumblebees dipshit, they are beautiful and non-erratic
>>56762300
>>56762337
Forgot to mention i got stung by one when i was three years old or so. Painful shit.
At least they die afterwards, so that's good.
>>56761943
Actually the whip-scorpion/vinegaroons aren't on this continent, which is kind of odd as they're a relatively primitive critter.
We get some big fucking locusts from time to time, which 'might' be the biggest of their type in the world as far as I know. Personally I've not seen many of them since I was a kid, we'd catch them and use them as live surface-baits for freshwater fishing.
They pack a heck of a kick and they're back legs are covered in 'fuck off spikes' so they'd give you a bit of a beating if you where not careful.
Also one of the reasons the orb weavers tend to have such strong webs here, the old grasshopper isn't an easy mark
![georgia_thumper_by_gitona-d2y3303[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/Gy5NgCX.jpg "georgia thumper by gitona-d2y3303[1]")
We get these cute little guys here in georgia too.
They're called georgia thumpers.
When we were little, my sister and I used to find them and play with them. They're cute.
According to my grandfather, they also make amazing fishing takle, and I can say from experience that they're GREAT for catching bass while fly fishing.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytT4y42q7Q4
>>56762300
Oh - I hate bees, but I'd never kill one.
I aspire to be a wildlife conservationist.
>>56762416
Another insect I've not seen running around much is the Goliath stick insects. I've seen babies around (10cm/6" or so long) but the bigger adults are fairly scarce.
>>56762424
>>56762416
Our posts cover the exact same topics, and they were posted back to back.
That's spooky.
Grasshopperandfishingmind
>>56762424
>cute little guys
lmao, hopperlets BTFO
Pic related is what a REAL insect looks like
>>56762479
One of them was in my house a couple of months ago, I had to catch it in a big Tupperware container. Was a real hassle, it was at like 2 in the morning.
>>56759891
>you can HEAR spiders
Nothing on God's green Earth that can make me go to this rock
>>56762481The giant Weta's a dick, though. It bites and draws blood.
Thumpers don't do that.
They're 100% real love.
We get these monsters here in the US too.
I just yesterday had to catch one with my bare hands.
>>56760281
>we don't have them in straya
>>56760509
ONLY the size of my hand??
Anon, I can't
>>56762480
haha
I don't have a lot of time to go fishing much lately, being on the coast now its a little bewildering to what I'm used to catching. Grew up mostly around slow-flowing inland rivers and mountain streams with trout in them.
When I'd visit out west to family farms they'd also get these weird fuckers come out after rain, they're actually surprisingly big bastards around 6-7" long and just sort of mosey around chewing up dead plants. They're a relict population animals only found on one particular small mountain range.
Also around there where about 3 species of carnivorous land snails which aren't found anywhere else in the world, they chase around other veggie snails and murder them.
Pepe lives in America
>>56762481
Weta's are cunts. Had one of them scare the fucking shit out of my missus when we visited NZ a few years ago.
They are huge.
In Nth Qld you can sometimes find the endemic cockroaches as well, they live out in the bush and aren't sort of like the little pest ones, they won't come inside your house and gobble down all your cornflakes.
>>56761224
I heard that they weren't actually supposed to be introduced cause tests showed it wouldn't work then some cunt went and let them loose
>>56762530
Neat, best one I've ever seen would have been about 20cm long as was a more brown-green than the one in the picture.
Once they're in vegetation they're next to impossible to see.
>>56761611
Have you seen these before? I've never in my life
>>56762759
When I was stationed up outside of Darwin I did, they'd come around very rarely at certain times of the year.
Another critter I'd like to see is the Gippsland worms, which from all accounts are getting fairly rare.
Lets face it, a 10ft long earthworm is pretty fucking cool
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Giant_Gippsland_earthworm
>>56759891
nah, not buying it
We get these guys here in Georgia, too, but they're super rare to see.
You can occasionally hear them at night, though.
>>56762820
What happens to a woman if that thing crawls into her naughty space?
>>56762914
rare flag familia
>>56762927
...no.
Fuck this whole thread, holy shit fuck Straya.
>>56762881
I've been attacked by cougars once or twice, usually late at night around 2am, they loaded up with bourbon, drinks with umbrellas in them and will jump on anything with a pulse.
We have a stray cat in the area that I've been putting food out for but occasionally I'll hear what sounds like a Michael Bay movie on my patio and I'll look out the window and see these guys.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3LpQkOpD20
>Work as a labourer for a groundskeeping business
>Middle of summer
>Have to clear a vacant dept housing home that hasn't been mowed for over a year in near 40 degree heat
>Grass was way too thick for a mower, had to use a whipper snipper on the entire yard
>Every few feet I progress I uncover another nest of spiders or roaches in the grass
>Get spiders on me
>Have to cut a bunch of bushes out of a garden bed
>Get bigger spiders on me
>Had nearly every spider native to this part of the country on me in a day
>MFW
We also have these lil' cuties
> euros and americans will never know the moment of fear when picking up an old bicycle
REDBACKS. REDBACKS EVERYWHERE.
>>56763122
Wood and brick piles are much worse for it desu.
>>56763089
I would prefer bears anytime over fuckin Australia-sized spiders tbph familia.
Burrs a cute.
>>56763166
This is even a fear stateside, they live for that shit
>>56763087
When I was a young fella, worst was filling up the barrow with firewood.
I fucking swear everything crawled out of that wood pile... black snakes, 4-5 species of spiders, the odd goanna and sometimes really fucking angry brown snakes.
imagine being the first convict shipped to Australia, and you see that shit when you get there
>>56763332
> see
feel* ftfy
>>56763233
Yep. Do you guys get redbacks there, or is it something else that hides in wood piles?
>Visiting Australia
>At one of our famous natural attractions
>Rest against a rock for a little while
>Feel something crawling up your arm
>It's this mother fucker
What do?
>>56763301
Thankfully I haven't had to deal with any snakes at work yet, but I have been warned about them in some of the areas we go to. We never had a wood pile growing up, but for some reason my dad had a massive pile of bricks sitting in our back yard for ages when I was a kid. It was redback city in there.
>>56763089
CUTE
>>56763402
I've shared a sleeping bag with one.
It was not a good way to wake up with it running across your chest at 6am, threw it across the tent and beat its arse to death with a boot.
>>56763087
>a vacant dept housing home
Could've been worse, they could've been still living there.
It's only a matter of time now lads
http://www.stuff.co.nz/nelson-mail/news/77987956/aussie-spider-spins-golden-web-in-mapua
>>56763455
>All these creatures with an inexplicable affinity for sleeping bags
What's the go there? Do they think it's a hidey hole or something? Surely sharing a hole with a giant mammal would seem like a bad idea to them.
>>56763455
I've had my tent fill up with scorpions randomly camping one time. None of them got in my sleeping bag though thank god.
>>56763516
Holy shit this is brilliant; why are we not doing this on a larger scale? Why are we not covering the east coast of NSW and Victoria with giant fucking fans and giant fucking bags of spiders and pointing them at NZ to punish them for sending all their dregs here?
>>56763440
You can get snake-gaiters which are sort of handy to avoid bites, also really handy for keeping burrs out of your socks
>>56763519
I dunno, just glad I wasn't thrashing around and got bitten in the process. Apparently they're fucking nasty venom.
>>56763583
We did manage to export redbacks to china, japan and NZ :)
heh
>>56759891
>staying with grandmother in Australia
>figure the whole spider thing is just a meme and not really that worried
>hear scrunching in the middle of the night
>turn on the light
>fucking huge spider walking over a plastic carrier bag I left on the floor
>the spider is so big it's making the bag crunch really noisily
>sudden change to cold weather last week
>hunstman (like in pic) gets into the living room
>little sis screams
>hunstman panics and scurries around ceiling
>dad comes over to trap hunstman in bucket, says he'll release it
>find out later that my dad killed it
Poor little guy
he just wanted somewhere warm to chill
>>56763519
Its the heat you fucktard. Same rule applies for boots. That's why when you're out bush you never leave your sleeping bag open when you're not inside, and you never put on your boots without checking inside them first. The pests love a warm place to cuddle up for the night to rest before jagging cunts the next day. Spoopy motherfucking brown snakes and taipans are notorious for it.
>>56760208
So basically spiders next door keep you up at night.
>>56763725
> next door
in your room desu. its not as bad as it sounds, they usually just chill in a corner somewhere and leave you be
>>56763586
If I ever end up on sites where I see a lot of snakes, then I might look into something like those, but in the meantime I'm trying to keep layers to a minimum, although at least it's starting to get cooler. Also yes, I've heard they have a mean bite and venom, too.
>>56763509
Depends. A lot of the people we meet in housos are alright. Just easygoing people, happy that somebody is there to mow their lawn. But some of the bogans and Abos we see, holy shit they are animals. I have a hard time seeing how some people live that way, if you can call it living.
>>56761137
Cute
>>56763708
I didn't know, doesn't mean you have to be a cunt.
>>56763708
Why are you being such a fuck wit about it? He was just asking
>>56763758
Mind you, bit of lower leg protection might not be too bad on a mower/snipper anyway if you collect a glass bottle, rocks, bit of old tin or something, those things get some momentum behind them.
>>56763803
>>56763832
sensitive poofs
call someone a fuckwit and you and your bum buddy get all upset about it lel. its clear now that the seppos and poms walks among us
>>56763949
Yeah righto cunt, where ya from?
>>56761137
I love these
Before I moved houses, they would chill in my backyard every summer after stealing some cat food
>>56762978
When I was on exchange in Germany, my friends in my apartment block always called me over to kill or trap spiders for them
>ANON GET OVER HERE THERE IS A GINORMOUS SPIDER IN MY ROOM
>run to friend's apartment quick, knowing what the definition of a "ginormous" spider is in Aus
>get there and it's tiny, body's probably a little more than half a cm
Meanwhile I come back home and a few months in, one of these bastards manage to get into my room
>>56763908
Not too worried about glass, because you can generally either avoid it or it lays flat enough to the ground that you can run over it anyway. Rocks and bigger pieces of metal are more of a problem. A bloke I work with ran over a scaffolding knuckle in some thick grass a while back.
>>56763973
What're you gunna do to him? Go bash him cause someone hurt your feelings on the internet? Harden up princess
>>56763949
Nah, you're just a cunt.
>>56764041
Now who has the butt buddy poofter? Take off your fuckin dress, nancy
>>56763949
Quit with your bullshit fake ocker act, you massive fucking faggot.
>>56761031
KEK
>>56764084
> because I don't have a strong accent it doesn't exist!!
>>56764066
>>56764079
hello lelbourne/shitney
>>56764273
>I was talking about your accent
>not your roleplaying skills
How's that latte you're sipping on? Need another yet? That law degree won't finish itself, you know!
>>56764273
>accent
Are you retarded?
>>56764298
> implying regional variations in accent don't affect the way you write and type casually
also
Project more lad lel.
>>56764273
Just so we know: How long do we have before your parents send you to bed?
>>56764364
Uhh, yeah. They don't. Regional variations in dialect do, but the only way you're going to display a regional variation in accent is if you were typing phonologically, and you weren't.
You must practice a lot at being wrong, you're awfully good at it.
>>56764457
>>56764364
>>56764298
Fuck just root already.
>>56764457
t.bh lad you should probably be happy they're using aussie mannerisms, it's better than ebin globalised amerishit
>>56764495
Just moved house, don't have any frannies at hand m8.
You guys have inspired me to check out /an/
>>56759891
>I'm not that scared of them, but sometimes I can hear them at night making that spooky clicking noise and screeching at each other, so that puts me on edge a bit
>>56763575
scorpions are cunts desu
one of the cunts stung my toe while i was sleeping at in-laws' place a couple years ago
not dangerous but that shit stings for hours
that fucker went on a spree stinging cunts every now and then for months before they finally caught him, kek
>>56762007
yes
Squirrels are often on the top ten smartest animals lists released by scientific studies.
That won't stop them from frying themselves in your attic, though
These guys eat the cool-looking whelks here on our coast
![CA778F2B655C4F928E650412CD010F0E[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/XY1oDlR.jpg "CA778F2B655C4F928E650412CD010F0E[1]")
We have a really bad boar problem.
This is a naturally-occurring wild boar that can be found here in the southeast US, and it is very aggressive.
These cute little guys live in my backyard.
They're such pitiful-looking little creatures.
>>56762985
lol'd heatedly
underrated post
![77ba1499cae94b46a993ddafadd29bec[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/7Pk7ypc.jpg "77ba1499cae94b46a993ddafadd29bec[1]")
>>56769188
Forgot image
>>56761614
Louisiana here. These fuckers are everywhere.
>mfw walking through the woods on a hunt and you feel the web across your face
>mfw one of these fuckers crawls down the brim of your hat right in front of your fucking face
They're harmless, but pretty spooky.
Florida is one of the worst areas in the world for invasive species. Everyone has probably heard of the Burmese Python problem, but there's also these guys. Roll over one with your car and your tire will pop.
>tfw I'm an Australian arachnophobe
JUST
>>56763089
At least bears and cougars are mammals. I fear and loathe crawly things with a passion ever since I got swarmed by fire ants as a toddler. I'm never moving back to fire ant country. And FUCK Australian spiders.
>>56763372
Black widows, m8. I think they're actually related to your redbacks, only widows have a red hourglass marking on the underside of their abdomens instead of the backside.
And yes, they'll often nest in woodpiles.
>>56770068
Sociopath then.
>>56760867
>yep, I'll take spiders over bears any day
There hasn't been a death by bear since 2007.
>>56763402
tickle his antennas and make a duckface
>>56759960
a bit late to the party but
>>56771059
There hasn't been a death by spider since the 80s.
>Tfw /tg/ gave me a spider fetish
One day I'll expatriate myself to australia, I don't even care about the shit internet.
>>56773023
Explain
>>56773608
It is simple, spiders are hot.
It began with half spiders monster girls but now I'm thrilled just to think about spiders.
My wish is to live like a crazed cat lady but with spiders instead of cats.
>>56761506
I hate these faggots, I killed 3 of them last week
>>56759960
Tasmania BTFO
This is the biggest one I've ever seen here, probably the biggest there is around these parts and I flip my shit internally when I see them, I wouldn't survive in australia.
I had an Australian flatmate for half a year last year. Once, there came a tiny little spider walking across the coffee table when we watching a film, and he screamed the girliest scream I had ever heard. In half a second, he was standing on the sofa and screaming for me to kill it. It was a tiny little thing, too. One of those black, absolutely harmless things. I'm a girl btw.
>>56774169
Why do you think he isn't in Australia anymore?
We banish people for that sort of behaviour.
![19dcc88d-bc03-49cd-a2ea-d3565b71ac1c[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/QPdi2dO.jpg "19dcc88d-bc03-49cd-a2ea-d3565b71ac1c[1]")
>>56759960
Which head?
I would be able to deal with the possibility of a giant spider jumping on me at night. Snakes is what I fear of the most.
>>56774214
>Why do you think he isn't in Australia anymore?
He went home by Christmas, m8.
>>56774169
Must be from the Australian antarctic.
>>56774242
Is that what he told you? We are very good liars too, but he wasn't banished for being a poor liar.
>>56774432
Here's the improved one
Never fails to give me a hearty fucking kek
>>56774532
Here's one I started working on
>>56759891
>be Australian
>literally get cucked by arachnids in my own home
>>56774669
>In MY own home
If the guy that's in your house is a cuck, that means that you're either a cuck or a double cuck.
>>56774694
uwotm8? I'm saying Australians get cucked by spiders in their homes and are scared to get out of bed at night.
>>56761349
The fuck? Dude bumblebees are harmless, they dont even have stingers you stupid faggot. Are you from the south or some shit?
>>56774773
I've literally watched one sting my stepbrother, you idiot.
Now sit down as I spoonfeed you your facts, you moron. And yes, I'm from the South. What's pathetic about this is that I'm not the one that's spouting BS
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_bumblebee
>Although Bombus pensylvanicus maintains a cautionary coloration and defensive stinger...
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bumblebee
>Female bumblebees can sting repeatedly...
If you're going to start calling names, get your facts straight.
Yes, I'm butthurt
>>56775561
Are you sure you didnt confuse them with wasps or honeybees, you dumb hick? Sorry about your stepbrother though, but I'm sure incest with him wasnt as pleasurable as it is with any actual relatives
>>56761126
i like this
>>56769276
that is a big pig. We used to have such interesting wildlife in the UK but it was all gone by about 1300.
>you will ride out of your castle to hunt wild boar
>you will never have your tv interrupted by an announcement saying a couple of wolves are wandering about the neighbourhood (happened in my ex gf's place in finland)
>you will never see a lynx hunting peoples shitty domestic cats
>you will never have to worry about leaving food in your car incase a bear breaks in
damn the middle ages britbongs for enjoying hunting so much
>>56769276
We have a boar problem here in the north. Everyone and their dog shoots them though so you almost never seem them around any sort of population center. Have them come through my block though and fuck the fences and rip the swamp up.
>>56775723
Fancy, but remember that the snake uses a slightly more cartoony apprach with outlining.
So too should the moose
>>56761611
I saw one of those moths about a month ago. Thought it was a fucking bat until it landed on the table, and normally the bats just fly into the fan. They're absurdly large in person.
>>56775942
I just linked you articles that say that the bumblebee can sting, and you're ignoring them.
This here be b8, m8. You had me str8 ir8, so it's pretty gr8.
Hohols > Spiders > shit > piss > puke > vomit of the death > shit with vomit of the death > immigrants
You are walking in a forest and sudenly see this? What do you do?
sometimes I'm actually thankful that germany doesn't have any animals worth mentioning
>>56778584
I'm glad to be in a country like that too. We used to have tigers but thankfully they were all killed before humans started caring about biodiversity and stuff like that
>>56778584
Arabs.
>Have arachnophobia
>Click on all spider threads
I don't know why I do it.
>>56778584
>g*rmans are proud they destroyed all their nature and live in an overpopulated industrial shithole
absolutely disgusting
>>56778043
Presumably I can outrun it?
>>56781251
Bears can run really fast.
>>56778043
>cubs
You're absolutely fucked unless you play dead
Even then there is only a slim chance of survival
>>56781251
Running away is the last thing you should do. A bear can run as twice as fast as you, and running away gives it the impression that you're a prey animal.
Spiders are the devil's vermin and they've been tolerated for far too long.
Australia needs to burn.
>>56784143
Is standing on your tippy toes and spreading your arms and screaming like an idiot a strategy that really works or is it just a meme?
This thread is painful to read. I'll take a bear in my house over a big-ass spider anytime, at least you can see the bear coming
If spiders were as big as bears, I don't think I'd be that scared of them
>>56785071
Taunting the bear with her cubs will be as successful of a strategy as climbing into a tree is
>>56763623
>>56763623
Thank you very much for your redback widow spiders. In return here is a gift from Japan desu.
>>56785386
I just don't understand why the average Australian isn't recruited for our special forces after dealing with all that rather than leaving them to shitpost all day.
we have lots of this creatures in the reich.
>>56760867
almost impossible to meet beer. they will hear you and move away. they are only dangerous if you cross their path when they have cubs. also, ticks and drunk hunters do more damage than beers.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Et--lFINQOM
>>56763089
>tfw no black bear cub to do bear stuff with
We also get these mean little turds here in Georgia
>>56786907
It's just a big kitty tBh
>>56787029
It really isn't.
Have fun thinking it's a cute little catch as it looks at you as its prey.
They're about 3 feet long - they're lynxes, not housecats.
Imagine how an angry housecat constantly goes out of its way to attack and harrass its owner when it's mad.
Now imagine a 3 foot long (about 1 meter) cat doing the same thing to someone.
Now imagine that, rather than behaving like that until it calms down, it's simply never not mad.
Enjoy.
>>56787198
I don't think it's "just a big kitty" anymore tBh
>>56787296
They only aren't in the sense that you can't look at them the same way your would a kitty.
That being said, in terms of everything else, yeah - they are just big kitties.
Big, angry kitties.
>>56786907
we have them also, they are called iberian lynx. sadly, they are almost extinct.
>>56760509
Those must be some REALLY tiny bricks, then.
>>56759693
Fuck Australia and every living thing in it. I say we send all the Muslims there. It's surrounded by shark infested water, they will never escape.
What an utter shithole
My spider stories
Story 1:
>be 10
>waking up from sleepover with best friend
>feel something moving on my face
>instinct my grab it
>feels hairy and keeps moving
>open my eyes to be met by the hideous face of some hideous spider
>my best friend is already awake playing tamagotchi
>instinctively throw spider at friend
>he goes fucking insane, body contracting like this Wigga was possessed
>almost does the Old cartoons running in the place and runs the fuck out of the room followed by me
For my next story I will tell you about the spider I'm living with. His name is Barry.
>>56787946
Ours aren't that specific species.
Ours is a type called the bobcat
>>56785653
No thanks, we don't want you to starve when you run out of dogs.
>>56776799
>wikipedia
>reliable
>>56790837
Here you go, you goofball.
http://www.orkin.com/stinging-pests/bees/bumblebees/stings/
Not only can they sting, their stingers also lack barbs, meaning that they can sting multiple times unlike the honeybee.
So, there it is, you retarded, inbred sperm bank yank.
>>56769395
The Opossum's are pretty cute little things, I have seen them down southern US states having a bit of a squabble on a rooftop.
Mostly Ringtail and Brushtail possums around my Sydney place, the Ringtails are fairly small and tend to stick to the trees, yelling at each other 'fuck off its my tree!' all night. The Brushtails are about the size of a fairly large cat and they'll run around on the ground causing mischief.
>>56792329
Some clever cunt also decided to import Brushtails to NZ for their pelts... then they got out and decided to take over.
These ones will generally find their way into roofs like the Raccoons do in the US, shit everywhere, fight, fuck and generally cause a huge mess.
>>56792481
I've never heard of raccoons getting into people's attics here. Are you sure you aren't thinking of squirrels? We've got the grey squirrel here, and not only is it one of the smartest animals on the planet, meaning that no trap is good enough to trick it, and even if one falls for, say, a mousetrap, the others will learn from that one's mistake, but it's also so smart that it likes to make nests in your attic out of... electric wires.
Have fun smelling death.
>>56792636
Yeah a guy from Louisiana was telling me they used to get into his parents house and they'd spend a fair amount of effort wiring off the sills around the roof to keep the little shits out
Mostly mummy raccoon would find it a nice quiet spot to raise babies.
The Quoll is one of our rarer carnivores, they're suffering pretty badly from things like cats out-competing them for prey and are on the way to becoming endangered. I've only ever seen one (Tiger Quoll) in the wild and that was nearly 20 years ago now.
>>56792636
maybe it's just a northern thing. I've never heard of squrriels getting into roofs at all but I've heard of raccoons.
>>56762569
I saw a shitload of those in Istanbul
>>56793079
As much as they're regarded as a tree-rat kind of pest, I always found Squirrels entertaining fuckers.
Have a Numbat, they're a very rare species now and only a few relict populations left- they're actually more of an anteater than anything else.
>>56789950
>bringing the bantz
Canada hasn't clinched the title yet
>>56785071
You use that strategy with bobcats and cougars you retard
Acting big and threatening against a momma bear will get you fucking killed
>>56791333
lol i knew bumblebees can sting i was just giving you a hard time buddy, maybe you should control your anger pal
>Reading this thread
>MFW it's too cold and rainy for anything to survive here
TYBG
>>56785071
>>56781251
you're supposed to be making noise constantly so you don't surprise the bear, if it knows that you're there it won't fuck with you unless it has cubs
>>56759693
I have watched a Huntsman fighting/dragging a wasp around the backyard one arvo.
Excellent entertainment.
>>56759891
Fuck, that's so fucked up nigga
>>56789950
Dogs are eaten by Korean, not by Japanese...
>>56793480
Oh, they are. Squirrels are amazing.
It's story time, cunts.
One time, when I was living in Kentucky (they're everywhere, there), I was walking down the street with some friends when I felt something hit my shoe right as I passed a tree. We all stop, and I look at the ground behind me, expecting to see a branch or perhaps an acorn, but rather only to see a chicken wing. Of course, chicken wings don't just grow on trees, so if it fell out of a tree, the implication would normally mean that you're about to get mugged. So, I turn my attention to the tree next to me and see a squirrel sitting there about three feet above my head, just silently chattering his teeth at me.
A few months before this, right as I was moving into my new home in Fort Campbell, I looked across the street in time to see a squirrel bolt out of the open front door of the home across from us, carrying something in his mouth. He runs towards my house and up a tree in my yard, perching himself on a low branch to devour his prize. Using my ninja-hawk-vision, I discern that what he was holding was in fact a slice of pizza.
Squirrels are great.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0NxxZWMOMQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0so5er4X3dc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95q_xmo769M
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LAfKZUn9sZ0
At least you guys don't have these things hanging around.
>>56793079
>>56793447
>>56796543
Someone say skwerls?
What's going on here
>this thread
I may live in a frozen shit hole but at least I don't have to deal with these assholes vdry often. Whenever a spider crawled on me I used to get an aerosol can and burn the fuckers.
>>56785831
Actually my dad was in a research team that studied bears behavior and they equipped bears with tracking collars. They tested several times with different bears that what happens when human approaches them and how close they let people come. They found out that bears likes to hide in thick bushes and let people walk past rather than fleeing off. Closest the researchers got was about 5m before the bear started to make sounds and they backed off.
So there is a possibility that if you walk in a forest where bears live, there is a bear nearby chilling under some bush.
>>56797238
This is usually what happens in my experience
the forests around here have quite a few bears. Only actually see them once in a while, but they're there.
They don't really give a fuck one way or the other about you as long as you don't startle them
>mfw I see one of these gorgeous fuckers while camping
>>56761276
>filename
kekked audibly
>>56774669
>be german
>literally get cucked by negroids in my own house
>>56759891
Reminds me of when I visited the Philippines
>innahouse in Northern Luzon
>see spiders usually in the corners of the bathroom, at this point I'm not too bothered as long as they stay in the corners
>Notice an odd large dark spot wedged between a cabinet and the mirror
>realize dark spot has too many eyes
>Its a massive fucking spider
Didn't use that bathroom after that.
>>56778043
mag dump
>>56796543
Closest we've got is the marsupial version of the flying squirrel- sugar gliders
They're nocturnal though and practically never around in the day so its really rare to see them.
>>56759891
just smash them with something
>>56759891
>>56759917
What the fuck???!!
Im never going to Australia
is there a spider poisen/trap or somthing like that.
how do you get rid of them?
I happy with the sanils in my garden.
sometimes I can find one with out the shell in my house and I just put him out.
>>56798355
who won desu
>>56760352
Or worst. Babies on ur face
>>56793674
>intentionally making someone angry
>"Aww don't get angry, control your anger, pal"
>tfw will never ever die in the hands of mother nature
I survived motherfucking 85, nothing could fuck with me
>>56759891
>you can actually hear spiders on the walls
Fuck that. I can't even sleep knowing that there might be a spider outside my window.
>>56800173
>I survived motherfucking 85
>nothing could fuck with me
*laughs in Chilean*
>>56800173
>mfw I survived the 2010
>>56799153
Many people get their house sprayed annually, which stops most insects/arachnids from getting inside. Main reason I do it is because of flies and spiders.
>>56800660
>mfw I survived 2015
Spiders are tame compared to this little guy here. They live in the amazon and they get into your dick when you try to pee into any body of water. Once there he will slowly eat your dick from the inside. There is no way to get them out except with surgery, which can possibly fuck your dick up forever anyway.
>>56801121
bump for candiru, enemy of mankind
>>56802210
>>56801121
Wow. Niceeee. Can't be too big if it's completely concealed within a Brazilian's urethra.
fuck australia
>>56803066
Rude
>>56803066
How bout fuck you
>>56803528
Please do
The worst I get here are either wasps, roaches or squirrels dying on electricity cables and leaving me without internet for hours.
These >>56761631 used to be scary until I realized they're basically the cats of the arachnids.
>>56759891
Fucking Australia.
I heard that people die in 'Straya because big ass huntsman spiders or some shit get into the sun visors in their cars, and then when they open it while driving on the highway or something a big ass spider drops on them and they freak out and crash.
Can any strayans confirm?
>>56804439
yes, that nearly happened to me once, I saw the little fucker's eyes glinting in the little gap between the sun-flap and the roof, so I pulled over to throw him out, but if I'd opened up the sun roof without realising and he'd dropped on me while I was driving the surprise might have caused an accident
![bumble-bee-2[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/tyDiGsp.jpg "bumble-bee-2[1]")
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