Can you spot what's wrong with this picture?
>>56012722
Using an iPhone. Disgusting.
How did he take the picture?
Boys are too close, something gaily here.
>taking pictures of mirrors
>2016
>>56012722
>the window isn't double-glazed
>>56012991
third world tier
>>56012722
what's wrong with their lips?
>>56012722
It just looks like three niggas getting ready to do yoga to me desu senpai
>>56012722
At my university I was lucky enough to meet like minded losers who were bullied in high school. Together we formed elite social cliques with people who thought: (1) our high school grades in basic biology and year 9 level English made us intellectually superior to Stephen Hawking (2) our middle class background entitled us to act like a villain in a horrid Bollywood romance movie about the caste system and (3) being elitist is a good way to compensate for being a lame outsider amongst normal people. Through continual reinforcement of these ideals, we developed a foul smugness that deters sane people and attracts other smug dickheads to our group. We only talk about work, politics, tax schemes, networking and other inane pseudo-intellectual topics. That’s right, I’m a lawyer. My name is Evan Loin. But you can call me Sir Loin.
I’m glad I could meet you here at my law firm’s networking event, where I’ll corner you so I can prove to you how much more law-stuff I know. I’m going to show you how much of an expert I am on one of the world’s lamest, most uninteresting topics. I have a great memory for completely useless, boring cases, a skill that has now been relegated to search engines and Wikipedia. If I can’t match your ability to recall some case about a contract for the delivery of wool from 1882, then perhaps I can demonstrate how much better than you I am by discussing other soulless topics. Or even pretentious topics, for instance, have you tried the twenty-twelve Cab-Sav from Motion Grundle estate? I wouldn’t know the difference between it and a white wine with red food colouring, but my friend Simon’s family own that estate and I’m going to wedge the fact that I know Simon into every conversation I manufacture about wine.
>>56012722
We should go and stay there, with my friend Simon. At my friend Simon’s winery. Maybe I can invite some couples who refer to themselves as a ‘power couple’, some ugly single women with unwashed hair and a few questionably closeted “funky” “fun” queer single guys. It’ll be a blast. At my friend Simon’s winery. We can talk about the latest case law, again and again, but none of that sullied despicable stuff like criminal or family law, just commercial decisions and constitutional challenges. We can all admire Justice Anthony O’Dongle’s pithy comments in Fucked Mining Ltd v Conglomerate Shitheap Pty Ltd, where he said “I do not concur with the decision of my fellow Justices”. HAHAHA what a truly witty man of the highest intellectual calibre.
My colleague-friends and I agreed at the latest Law Society Young Boring Fucks Committee Meeting that common peasant people don’t understand how hard it is to become a lawyer. Imagine an Arts degree like ‘Australian History’ with slightly more reading. See, not so easy now is it. I have to work 90 hours a week, mostly photocopying, reading other lawyer’s long winded lies and creating volumes of my own horseshit to justify the $450 an hour (ex GST) I charge large corporate clients who pay for my firm’s letterhead to scare off other equally misguided companies. My parents were able to send me to an elite, all male, homosexually repressed college, which I take to mean I am a hyper-intelligent-genius selected by God to go and do great things in the world. Despite my God-given divine intellect, I can’t figure out that the legal industry rewards the slowest morons who can spin the most convincing bullshit about why they’ve taken so long to do something so simple like fax a document.
>>56012722
The more hours it takes me to do something, the more hours I charge our client, the more money my firm makes, so the bigger my bonus and pay rise! That sounds like a really constructive system that is not open to abuse! Only a shitty soulless human-turd-in-a-suit like me would brag about being a lawyer and drop it into every possible conversation as a way of masking that I am truly just a snobby, boring, egotistical douchebag. Oh yeah, we still use faxes to send documents, back in time to 1997.
You may not know, but my law degree is from an elite Australian university. It’s so elite it’s ranked 192nd in the world… Despite what some people may think is a poor education, I treat this degree as the equivalent of being given an honorary peerage from the Queen to become the Seventh Earl of Wessex, which explains the sudden change in my voice and mannerisms to that of an old-money Eton educated Shakespearian Viscount. Away with you commoners, with your long hair and pop music. I now only listen to live performances of Rachmaninoff and drink 200-year-old whiskey. Excuse me, I’m going to lie to some work experience girl about how I can get her a job here at Clunge, Fhartz and Bile and pressure her into sleeping with me after she gets drunk on the power I’m exuding as an Associate Lawyer at this end of financial year “sundowner mixer”.
>>56012722
They are not sucking my dick
>>56014013
>>56014070
>>56014126
can you sum it up for me?
>>56014154
this
>>56012722
uniforms
>>56012722
Who was phone??
>>56016132
>uniforms are a bad thing
>>56012722
They probably grow up to be homosexual.
>>56012722
homosexuality?
