enoch edition
first for /balt/
cara a shit
CARA IS AN UGLY CAVEMAN
>he was right
>>53770047
Meme Prime Minister desu
Inability to make decisions is the ultimate normie trait. Normies offload all decision making to the normie hivemind, they are thoughtless drones, plankton flowing in a current. A current that I control.
animal house is the greatest movie ever made lads
>>53770078
>hello I repost webms from Reddit for (You)s
going to play some FUT now
>>53770084
should have mentioned 'pawns' t.bh
sydney cole is a seriously good looking pornstar
EUNACH
What do I unironically put on my tinder profile lads?
>>53769713
Ford sierra 2.0 on the taxbook but it's had a 2.9 BOA V6 swapped into it with megasquirt ecu with full cosworth kit all round not on cossie wheels any more but lattices cuz cossies are 800 quid thanks for reading
*watches as all of you runts scurry from the old thread to the new one, like rats fleeing a sinking ship, the squeals almost deafening*
Pathetic....
watering my plants so to speak
>>53770115
>Admitting you know it's from reddit.
The bait has been taken.
>>53770047
pretty annoyed at how many girls will just stop showing interest in me and will then stop replying. also pretty annoyed that it's considered a taboo to ask them whether or not they're still interested because "apparently you've only been talking to her for 2 days" or "it seems a bit dramatic".
>>53770123
did you not say that like 15 hours ago? i remember it being around 7:30am here and you said that and i replied with something like "that's an odd thing to say"
>>53770115
it's off vine lol, literally been all over facebook entitled reddit scum
>>53770070
nice
Just saw a girl at work with a ridiculously nice big bum, she wasn't even fat either. Literally every bloke was staring at her in amazement
>>53770084
A modern classic
>>53770130
whats wrong with "thrilled to be here"?
Just saw a girl at work with a ridiculously nice big bum, she wasn't even fat either. Literally every bloke was staring at her in amazement, it was basically Alexis Texas tier
How do i pull on Tinder lads? specifically asking the Turbo Normies in the thread
>>53770138
What did he mean by this?
>>53770175
He fucking loves a nice big bum, this one
areet then lass
>>53770084
youre my favourite poster desu
>>53770130
"I can keep your heart colonized for over a century"
bum
nth for elaine the pain
>>53770154
That was a post about Elsa Jean I think? Lovely little blonde pornstar
I hate real life because it's cold out there
>>53770116
Fuck off Calfreezy
>>53770078
Poorly edited desu
>>53770175
deja vu, LOL!
>>53770162
literally no point if you've scared them off
>>53770221
guarantee she'd still let a male model shag her up the arse even if said whats up, it's just a shit test
Having flashbacks of the time I took DMT with mates and seen the interracial breeding grounds.
It's hard to convey the scale of this thing. It's as if one entire country was designated to be this breeding ground ,
and white women made a pilgramage there from the world over.
Thousands of waiting room tents on a completely level field, cum storage vats the size of grain silos,
Then the main breeding facilities which hold thousands of the strongest fittest black studs,
With suction tubes attatched to their cocks like the ones attatched to cows utters, draining their balls.
Then after they were drained they would remove the apparatus and head into one of the resting tents.
The cum went up through thousands of tubes into individual transparent holding vats in the ceiling,
coming down in a large circus style big top tent where thousands of women lined up to sit on these bench styled apparatus with individual arse recessed seats which inseminated them,
There were changing room facilities for the women to put their clothes while they got inseminated.
When my mates ask me what my experience was like I had to lie and say I was flying over a forest
>>53770175
bum wanker love his fucking bum
>>53770221
>any harassment will be reported
that sums it up quite well
>>53770221
Fucking hell
>what's up
Fuck off yank
yo lads what does it mean if i never want to masturbate
What would happen if a sun made of ice would collide with a normal, lava-made sun?
Both suns would be the same size and ice-made sun's temperature would be -1000 degrees of celsius and normal sun's temperature +1000 degrees of celsius.
Would their combined effects cancel each other out so that instead there would be only empty space or one 0-degree sun?
>>53770221
""""University"""" of """"York""""
>>53770202
If you need to ask then you're way too beta to actually meet a girl
>>53770234
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANK
>>53770241
Was considering going for a bike ride and getting a mcdonalds but it's too cold and I cba
>>53770296
you still wouldn't have a gf
might get tinder tbhwy
>>53770154
Same with me really, most girls will be attracted to my picture and message me but they lose interest when they get to know me.
reckon I'd smash tinder if I were on it but I've already got a gf don't I haha
>>53770283
low test
eating a jam doughnut if you catch my drift
>>53770296
>a normal, lava-made sun
ahh excellent
Wish I had Facebook lads, an abnormie lad I went to school with has gone fucking mental.
>takes steroids all the time
>goes on Facebook and actively defends his steroid use
>he's a big guy (but he's only 5'2)
>blogposts his fucked up life several times a day
>developed a massive ego
>posts nude pictures on his Facebook
>few months ago he posted a status saying "I love the pain in my heart when I inject"
>last week he wrote another status saying "had to go to the hospital again, my heart was hurting really bad and everything was purple I think I'm dying"
>sells steroids at the gym he works at, posts pictures of all his product on Facebook
>always getting drunk and fighting people, then posting pictures of his injuries, always offering people out to fight if they say anything to him in Facebook
>he's still a virgin and has never had a gf, he's been blogposting a lot about how his mum thinks he's gay recently
whisper to me your secrets
>>53770296
>sun made of ice
cuck music lads
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JwI1-aAyvMk
>>53770297
>>53770278
>>53770277
>>53770262
I swiped right lads, I'll let /brit/ decide what to message her when she does the same
>>53770315
Got your profile pic here lad
sons of dis
Need to act normie later for the first time in about 7 weeks
cracking my knuckles in a certain manner of speaking
>>53770334
kek. can you post his name?
>>53770296
>lava made sun
xd
>>53770334
i use to be mates with this guy in high school and he turned out gay and his life just got fucked up hard, and it was all on facebook for us to see.
he does ice, crack, heroin, has a tranny boyfriend, actively goes into drug psychosis and will invite everyone on his friends list into a chat and, before everyone, accuse his dad of sexually molesting him when he was younger.
absolutely cracked cunt.
why should i be condemned to a life of loneliness? i deserve a gf
hahahaha
*wipes away a tear*
yeah
>>53770296
>sun made of ice
> -1000 degrees of celsius
>>53770334
kek can you go on his account without requiring an account? I'd love to see some screenshots
>>53770364
>considers 7 weeks of inactivity abnormie
Fuck off normalscum.
>>53770344
thought she was american
a chubby girl called lauren super liked me, what shall i message her lads?
>>53770265
>people will actually trip with a head full of /pol/ memes
once again the gods spread cheeks to ram cock in arse
>>53770325
good shit, are there any actual problems with having low test
>>53770296
stars are balls of plasma
the ""ice sun" would melt on its way to the normal one
had some wild melatonin dreams again
might take a mad dose and see what comes about
just did a poo
*sound of flushing in the distance*
*stares at you*
Might get rid of my phone desu never use it
>>53770399
Get one then
>>53770434
"u dtf?"
ffs lads i got yellow fever over this girl hard but she has fucking dropped me REEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>53770296
/sci/ is a terrible board tbqh
another classic video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKiQRQOs_sg
>>53770434
come suckle on my lovely big willy x
>>53770296
>>53770309
>>53770332
>>53770336
>>53770381
>>53770449
Always get a weird feeling when I see people unironically replying to extremely old memes that they're too new to recognise. Makes me feel too old and like I need to move on from this place.
*thats not me plays in the distance*
going to start counting how many days I can go without drinking
-1
>>53770508
what are your head measurements
ill get my tailor to find you a suitable fedora
>all the working class jobs like steelworks are being gutted out
>let's keep importing 300,000 people a year
>>53770511
do you mean 'fortunate son' lol
>>53770461
Yeah keep that faggoty meme shit for Twitter Harry.
I just know this runt (53770537) is thinking about a trilby when he says ''fedora''
>>53770402
Good post
>>53770397
sounds absolutely cooked hahaha
To: Dribbling pond runt who penned post No. 53770508
> Six (6) free (You)s
played like a fiddle
manipulated like a puppet
Get out of my sight
fucking hell lads middle class people are sensitive
>talking to qt
>I like your voice, it's so posh!
>I'm not posh. Don't call me posh.
But she was posh.
Posh bitch.
>>53770546
he meant my sick cover https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bVcj5h0WdbE
You bellends seriously overrate this whole having a gf thing. Girls are boring, and they're always trying to break your spirit and mould you into the man they want you to be.
>>53770537
Well meme'd my friend. I see you are familiar with the memes of this thread; you fit right in. You're one of the gang, one of us. No memes go over your head because you have a mastery of memes.
The main reason for Swedens high rape rape rate , Is because rape is reported differently in Sweden.
E.g if someone kidnaps a girl and rapes her for 50 days , it counts as 50 different rapes in Sweden, whereas in the UK that would count as 1 incident.
>>53770568
rog? ill link you his fb if its you rog x
seriously though i havent masturbated since the end of july are my balls going to explode or something?
>>53770434
Are you a Koala? Because you have all the koalities I'm looking for
>haha
>like what
Grey fur and black beady eyes
works every time
How do I erase memories?
Dear Mr. 53770555,
>>53770591
ill just get a really big one so you can shrink it in the wash if its too big
>>53770594
nah ed not rog here
Daily reminder that Jeremy corbyn was privately educated, got 2 Es at A-level and then dropped out of a polytechnic whilst studying for a degree in 'TRADE UNION STUDIES' fuck me you couldn't make it up
>>53770589
You're not wrong, but you're going to get fedora'd
>>53770577
It's fucking annoying m8, to working class plebs everyone is posh, so if you say 'you were' rather than 'you was' they go HAHA YOU'RE POSH
>>53770577
She obviously wasn't posh and you're a dumb peasant twat tbqhwy
>>53770296
You will get steam sun. Which will then form the atmosphere because of the high gravity and the rest of it will condense and rain down. This will give you a water sun, i.e. human-inhabitable sun.
>>53770380
>>53770419
I'm not friends with him on Facebook so I can't see his shit, I have to rely on my mates so keep me updated on his shenanigans. His names Liam Tuffy by the way, he'll most likely add you if you send him a request, just don't banter him too hard.
>pic related
>>53770585
Literally me
reminder that he actually said this:
Ralf Jaeger, German interior minister for North Rhine-Westphalia, has said that “what happens on the right-wing platforms and in chat rooms is at least as awful as the acts of those assaulting the women.”
>>53770577
Middle class people try their very best to pretend that class doesn't exist. Calling them posh is basically an insult.
>>53770589
But they are soft and warm and they suck your willy for you
>>53770636
but he has so much experience from his 32 years on the back benches
>>53770585
me when I listen to Kendrick lol
>>53770641
>>53770646
Eton alumni detected
are we flatcap posting now?
>>53770666
looks about 12
>>53770666
me on the right
>>53770674
at the end of the day that's all that really matters for all jobs desu.
>those fucking idiot blokes who have their gender as female on tinder on accident
>>53770668
>inciting racial hatred and violence is totally fine because we're just pretending :)
>>53770334
>>53770666
Why would you do that to yourself just to get muscles? Bloke could kill himself doing that.
>>53770724
I always thought they did it on purpose
>>53770724
>accident
You can be a woman with a femme penis desu
>>53770724
just bants mate
>Make joke that would be laughed at in real life on tinder
>She takes me seriously and didn't realise I was making it in jest
>unmatches me
Howcome when John Lennon starts a revolution from his bed it's ok, but when I try I get called a lazy workshy cunt by mummy and get threated with being kicked out?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2gzbz4dz9hk
reddest red flag on tinder is slags posing with brown poor kids
>i say "in jest"
>>53770737
it's mad, mild steroid use is no more dangerous than any other drugs but you can go hard on steds and noone will notice cos you can function normally and never be 'high'
>>53770723
>Jim has worked on the factory floor for 30 years so lets make him CEO over the executives and directors who have had 10 years of top level experience
>>53770776
>reddest red flag
hello norway
nsezig sneezi bh
*blows nose*
ahh MUCH better
>i dont say 'Twas a Jape'
I hear you're a racist now Father
>>53770625
yeah you're right but it's absolutely red hot
>>53770690
No, I just know the difference between a middle class person and a posh one.
>>53770812
was on purpose tbqh
>>53770723
>mfw a machine operator thinks he will become CEO
>>53770818
let me kiss that expressionless face~~
Nigel
>>53770818
I want to slap her and ram my willy down her throat
someone pood on the seat in the office toiled lads
http://uk.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=64867812
>>53770820
GOOD FOR YOU FATHER
![rik-mayall[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/FtYtjZM.jpg "rik-mayall[1].jpg")
>Howcome when John Lennon starts a revolution from his bed it's ok, but when I try I get called a lazy workshy cunt by mummy and get threated with being kicked out?
I keep all my pogs in my pocket
>>53770816
Good post, really got to me.
>>53770863
Any migrants working there?
There's been reports that some 3rd world migrants don't know how to use a toilet, so they poo on the seat. Especially Indian migrants.
HOW DO I ERASE MEMORIES? Asking for a mate
http://uk.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=111586384
>I'm looking to just have some chats. To be honest I've not been well for a while. I have M.E. so dating isn't possible at the minute since I rarely leave the house. But I do get lonely and miss having someone to talk to.
UKIP?!
*starts contemplating whether or not it gets better*
>>53770921
ALCOHOL
need some ambien
haha doing an imagine by johnathon lennon
>>53770930
alri owen
*comes to the conclusion that it does not*
feel quite hungry but there's always people in the kitchen
this is how I end up getting only 1000-1500kcals per day
singing loudly cuz home alone even though ive got a sore throat and a blocked nose haha i sound like an epileptic ape
>>53770930
BLOODY RACIST
>>53770928
damn, that's sad if true
haha doing a taking over? (it ain't working) by JME
why the fuck will there never be another series of adam and joe podcasts, fucking joe thinks he's such a big man because he directed fucking attack the block with the black lad from star wars you stupid cunt the adam and joe podcasts were the greatest thing to grace this desolate shithole we call 'england' fuck me
some stellar blogging going on right now lads, bravo
>>53770921
be the japanese government and commit war crimes in china and korea during your aggressive, expansionist, imperialistic war for resources and land during the 1930s and 1940s
I'm David Mitchell
Ask Me Anything
>>53770976
Just go into the kitchen
>0 (you)s = ugly
>1 (you) = eww
>2 (you)s = unattractive
>3 (you)s = average
>4 (you)s = attractive
>5 (you)s = sexy
>6 (you)s = PERFECT
Doubt me, Hate me
You're the inspiration I need
My life, my body, my pride
You have no say
My life, my body, my pride
You don't have say
Facing what consumes you is the only way to be free.
Though I'm still far from perfection.
I stay relevant, I'm still vigilante.
>>53770976
you'll never deadlift 500lbs with that attitude
poleboo has locked himself into the kitchen again
>>53771020
can't you read? I said there's people in there
>>53771023
as long as you eat me, cause i'm all naturally cheese
>>53771021
lets give it a try
http://uk.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=77224055
>that face
>I like tall guys
>>53770976
Iktfb
I just make tonnes of wheatbix. It takes 30seconds to get everything ready and 1.5minutes to heat up the bowl, wile the bowl is heating you can cut the banana and get the honey read. Then its another 30 seconds to put it together, get a spoon in it and back in your room.
>>53771001
>podcasts
>>53770976
>not boiling eggs in a kettle in your room, eating dry fruit and fibre and having a big tub of almonds
fuck off normie
I haven't washed in so long that my body smells of beef stew.
Quite pleasant actually. Meaty.
Your doubt, it fuels me.
Your hate, it drives me.
The challenge ignites me.
You make me fight harder.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u72f-eMvATE
>>53771089
>having a big tub of almonds
FUCK OFF LITERAL BILLIONAIRE
>>53771069
>that caption
>can't post emojis
Mook needs to fix this immediately
>>53771015
Can I have a go on yer wife's chebbos?
>>53770976
I used to be like that but then I ended up going in and trying to be really over familiar with everyone, which made them in turn avoid me - meaning I'd just walk in and get the whole kitchen to myself.
>>53771085
fuck off out my sphere of influence i'll end your kneecaps
>>53771069
top fucking roo
Literally don't care about David Bowie
>>53771069
Why are the women from Gogglebox there?
I am the biggest abnormie here
Anyone dare to challenge my title?
>>53771145
He never cared about you either.
I'm Joe Totale
The yet unborn son
The North will rise again
The North will rise again
Not in 10,000 years
Too many people cower to criminals
And government crap
The estates stick up like stacks
The North will rise again
The North will rise again
>he likes fat chebberz
Anything more than two handfuls is a fat sack
>>53770307
same but replace your verbs with 'going for for a run' instead
>>53771089
sounds expensive
>>53771084
yeah I make porridge oats and water in a bowl, whack it in the MC and then go to the loo until it's done and I leg it back to my room.
I really like baked beans cause you can eat them cold but I didn't realise the last lot I bought didn't have the clip to open them.
>>53771163
nah, i'm no turbo normie but definitely a normie
>>53771145
he had a nice package/ hair in his youth
don't like normies
i was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar
Planning on converting my muslim qt. She's top tier wife material but says we cant marry until we're the same religion. Ill make her super dependent on me ubtil she's desperate then tell her to convert or ill stop talking to her. 10/10 plan imho
http://uk.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=105025294
would 2bh
>>53771145
you probably just don't like revolutionary figures in music and pop culture then lol
swedish
http://uk.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=102414793
>he doesn't like fat sacs
>>53771191
fruit and fibre and eggs are cheap as fuck unless you're gay and go for 'good brands' or 'free range' and you can buy almonds cheap in aldi/paki markets
>>53771203
How will you make her super dependent on you?
>>53771190
Get into cycling mate, it's actually enjoyable.
>>53771203
Enjoy being hunted down by her dad and imam. You'll both be flayed
>>53771220
Straight up the shitter
I disregard anyone who ironically or unironically likes 'metallica'
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SfvYa4wsAj8
absolute fuckin choon tbqh
NO TAXATION WITHOUT REPRESENTATION
>>53771220
>trash
Fuck off yank
>>53771257
don't tell me what to fucking do
>Profession Self employed
they're probably an escort 2bh
>>53771252
Talk to her for a long time, tell her to stop talking to male friends etc. Basically you have to make her social life revolve around you. Shes already a shut in so its not hard
>>53771235
>fruit
>needs to be bought fresh and goes off quickly
you think I leave the house more than once a week?
>>53771313
Do it you cunt
>>53771275
>5'7
she's taller than me lol
>>53771326
>tell her to stop talking to male friends
How would that work?
http://uk.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=27269254
>Untouchable shes got her own force field
god you lot really are damaged arent you
the internet has fucked you up
Anyone get their Argos catalogue over the weekend?
Never shopped there myself but for some reason had this strange urge to get the catalogue on Saturday
>>53771331
fruit and fibre cereal you fucking idiot
People ask "why is such a fit girl using online dating?". She doesn't need to. She gets on just fine in real life, but that's not enough, women are total narcissists, online even an average girl can be sent dozens of messages a day. Half of them don't ever read any of the messages, they just get satisfaction from having received 200, 300, 400 messages
WHY DO GIRLS DO THIS THING WITH THEIR MOUTH IT LOOKS AWFUL
>>53771275
>croydon
same place as me haha
>>53771344
pass her over then
>>53771361
don't know about munching them dry tbqh it doesn't sound great
>commutecucks have to wait 3 or more hours before they can get on the sardine can to go home
top kek, commutecucks are the worst
Business idea : taxation without representation
>>53771357
Chebs desu
>>53771346
"Hey now we're getting serious you shouldnt talk to other guys."
if she gets pissy ill tell her i havent talked to othr girls for months and thought she'd reciprocate. Ive got like 4 muslim qts on the go so Im sure one is dumb enough to believe me
>>53771204
bit of a mong desu
>>53771379
its something to do with cheekbones I think
>finding most of the girls on pof in my area munters
>worrying that I might be gay or something
HELP
Business idea : Normie Tax
Watching the finale of prison break series one lads.
Don't tell me what happens. I'm really enjoying it
rare paige
>>53771448
do you live away from a city?
