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/brit/


Thread replies: 393
Thread images: 79

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Concierges sans Salaire edition
>>
/cum/
>>
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cracking lads
>>
Maisie
>>
how did you find this garbage picture of me my mom took? the color is all off
>>
/sverigetraden/
>>
>>52705274
m8 I told you it has meme potential. What do you expect posting your face on 4chan?
>>
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Have any of you lads seen this Austrian film Goodnight Mommy? Just finished it and was proper spoopy desu.
>>
Jannies on top of the shitposting edition
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someone just tried to break into my house so i broke into his skull the fucking the fucker
>>
Janitor
>>
>>52705349
Will you be arrested for defending your house?
>>
>>52705349
cracking post
>>
>>52705361
nah i was just neutralising the threat rozzers will understand
>>
2 hours until I need to wake up hahaha
>>
>>52705341
nah but its on the watch list
>>
>>52705367
Unless if it was a muzzie
>>
>>52705371
bet your on a watchlist and all haha fukin paedo
>>
how was your boxing day
>>
>>52705391
was alright
burglar tried to nick my boxes of presents so i boxed his head in
>>
If the american who kade the last thread is here
Why do you want to make me some sort of meme?
>>
she texted first lads
>>
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>>52705371
well enjoy lad, it was good although i'm worried it'll give me a cheeky nightmare
>>
>>52705361
Only if the burglar was non white
>>
>>52705409
Nice lad
>>
>>52705391
It was shit, I got rota'd in at work
>>
>>52705407
It's already taking off a bit, you're going to be the next big meme
>>
>>52705450
It needs a name to be successful
>>
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>look in mirror
>see 9.5/10
>take selfie
>see 9/10
>>
Good night lads

Wish me luck on 2 hours of sleep haha
>>
>>52705471
>look in mirror
>see tits
>take selfie
>see almost flat chest :(
>>
>>52705501
literally slept all day through boxing day so I don't think I will sleep haha
>>
>>52705467
He's red faced man
>>
>>52705534
terrible
>>
>tfw work girl hasn't snapchatted me
>first one to watch my story updates every time

hmm lads hmm
>>
>>52705543
You have something better?
>>
>>52705555
checked
>>
>>52705551
What's her snapchat? I'll send her a dick pic
>>
I'm trying to read things about expats in UK but they all live in fucking London
>>
>>52705592
m8 I'll bottle you
>>
right
thats the last time
even the dictionary definition of spiritual, which i looked up the other day, suggests its about the soul, another vague and probably non existent concept
no no, i get it alright you patronising cow
its you twats that dont get it
thats right, i called you twats
playing the guitar badly, wearing beads, talking about one love and pretending youre friends with central american villagers - who by the way, DESPISE you - before heading back to your parents 5 bedroom house in surrey, doesnt make you a spiritual person, it makes you a bellend
you dont believe in song lines any more than i do
its just a way for you to seem interesting to girls, because deep down you know you're boring and pretentious
just like your stupid fucking dreadlocks
which by the way, always look embarrassing on white people
theyre not countercultural, they actually scream "oh ive got a trust fund"
so get a normal haircut, you unbearable prick
goodbye
>>
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Going out on a date with this girl sometime in January

Fit?
>>
What's the best UK accent?
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>>52705655
hope you aren't seeing her at the pub, you brits have been known to have some difficulties with those types of meetings
>>
>>52705662
Birmingham
>>
>>52705655
shes looks vapid af

enjoy talking about Instagram
>>
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doing a walk to the shop
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>>52705762
But it's midnight
>>
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maRINa
>>
I'm fucked lads. Woken up and can't get back to sleep. it's 6am and I was drinking all day yesterday.

Used to be able to sleep longer when I was drunk (like 11am or 1pm wake up), now I wake up even earlier than usual if I drink. Shake-my-head (S.M.H.).


>>52705662
RP
>>
>>52705825
When the booze wears off you get wired and wake up, I have the same issue
>>
>>52705865
Out drinking again today/tonight la, four days on the trot. Need a break.
>>
>>52705798
She's a dream, shame her fan-base is composed entirely of tumblr memesters..
>>
>>52705895
You need to dry out lad
>>
>>52705921
it hurts my heart when i see people include her on their top album of the year lists alongside things like Halsey, Melanie Martinez and Twenty One Pilots
>>
Feel bad for poortherners lads, getting BTFO by floods on Boxing Day is a bit much 2bh.
>>
>the tumblr homepage isn't the page to log in
>the log in page is a click away from the homepage
what the fuck, fucking stupid ass design
>>
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>>52705982
>tumblr
>>
>>52706010
I use it for music tbqh
>>
>>52705975
It's just nature lad, the purest form of banter
>>
I have a massive painful pimple emerging on the inside of my nose lads haha
>>
>>52705756
>vapid
Nice buzzword m8

We've been talking now for about a week and a half, she's pretty cool
>>
>>52705982
>the tumblr homepage isn't the page to log in
>the log in page is a click away from the homepage

That's literally the case for every website apart from facebook

Especially content orientated ones like tumblr
>>
>>52706174
on every other social media, the sing up and log in bar are both on the first page
on tumblr, the first page is the sign up page, and the log in bar is on another page that you get to by clicking on a button on the first page.
>>
>>
>>52706201
tumblr is only good for degenerate pornography
>>
>>52706258
and music. most music pages are shit, but there are plenty of actually interesting ones
>>
A ella le gusta la gasolina (dame mas gasolina)
Como le encanta la gasolina (dame mas gasolina)
>>
My tummy hurts
>>
putting on a provocative colour coded uniform to go fight evil in lads
>>
I want you all to know that Jesus loves and cares for each and every one of you
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I can't wait until Disney owns the whole world.
>>
Somebody on Christmas asked me if I wanted a "short" and I thought that meant just a short drink, not a spirit to be mixed with a fizzy drink

Embarrassed myself hahaha
>>
>>52706291
*rubs ur tumtum*

there there
>>
>>52706152
>vapid
>buzzword

you might actually enjoy talking about ig
>>
Alright lads ulster here im still alive just dont have a keyboard for pc so on phone here anythimg fun happen over xmas
>>
brisbane floods were 5 years ago lads

absolutely mental to think about 2bh
>>
Renting a place in England

will i actually have to get a tv license or can i skip that process
>>
>>52706758
yep and take the test.
>>
Going to St Petersburg on 7 January, bit concerned
>>
>>52706773
No
>>
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I think girls in granny panties are really cute. I feel like they're classier than thongs tbqh
>>
>>52706628
You're a mong, mate
>>
>>52706856
Well, you will or its the stasi and their detector van mate. Penis inspection is nothing to the anal probing they will give you.
>>
>>52706858
it's not exactly difficult to outclass thongs
>>
>>52706740
>brisbane floods were 5 years ago lads
Why do you think anybody would care about floods in fucking Brisbane, especially when parts of the UK are flooded right now?

>>52706858
>I feel like they're classier than thongs tbqh
Well that's not fucking hard to achieve is it
>>
>>52706872
Why would anyone get a tv license if they can get anally probed
>>
>>52706875
true, I mean to say they are more innocent than thongs. I think it's cute when girls look sexy when they aren't trying to be
>>
>>52706878
because brisbane is a holy site
>>
>>52704965
making a Kev edit of this tomorrow
>>
>>52706886
>I think it's cute when girls look sexy when they aren't trying to be
You sound like a creepy paedo
>>
>>52706858
Fashion mate, you are just a victim of its cycles. That which has been around a while seems old and unsexy, what was old and unsexy 20 years ago is now deemed young and sexy because parents aren't wearing it.
>>
back from fighting evil lads
phew that was an exhausting one haha
can put my sword away for tonight though thank the gods :) x
>>
>>52706902
you're the one who thought of it that way
pedo
>>
>>52706949
Nope

Guarantee if you said that to a girl she'd think you're a creepy weirdo
>>
>>52706882
good point from your perspective perhaps, however having had a doctor say "i am going to put a torch up your backside, it may sting a little" and then have an agonisingly painful Lighthouse of Alexandria inserted, I would disagree on repeating the experience.
>>
>>52706966
thanks for advice

saludos
>>
L M A O

https://www.reddit.com/r/unitedkingdom/comments/3ybowz/big_fat_quiz_of_the_year/cycfcip
>>
Why aren't english people this funny?

https://twitter.com/iatemuggles/status/672409391296094208
>>
>>52706979
>tis
>>
>>52706988
I always cringe at that nonsense, ew
>>
>>52707034
it's like four in the morning in britian, what the fuck do you expect? also you're not even british you fucking mong
>>
>>52707034
or not ia (in actuality)
>>
Anyone on here on tinder? Been on tinder for a while, and seen my first "verified" profile today

Swiped right and matched despite it being a "famous tranny" just cos it was a verified profile lmao
>>
>>52707034
>JF's complaining about JFs
???
>>
>>52705304
FRENCH MENTIONED !?
>>
>>52707045
>doesn't even know the time in the UK

Fuck off you stupid yank cunt

It's 7:26am
>>
>>52707045

I am actually, and I expect Aus/NZ and morning Brits like the usual at this time you spastic.

>>52707055

Guess again Tyler
>>
>>52707045
>>52707080
hes right it is now 7:27am
>>
>>52707034
all me
>>
>>52707099
Of course I'm fucking right you dick head fuck off
>>
>>52707091
Why in the world are you down in Kiwi Country la?
>>
>>52707111
calm down
>>
>>52707111
just backing you up x (now 7:28am)
>>
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>>52706988
>>
>>52707126
you said it like I wouldn't know the time in my own fucking country

stupid fucking cunt

kill yourself please
>>
>>52707144
oo alright precious its 7:30am now if you were wondering
>>
>>52707132
shut up
>>
honestly can't decide if I wanna wank to Liza Del Sierra or Siri. Nasty french whore or chubby american whore? decide for me, m8s
>>
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ITS OVER MARIUS
I HAVE THE HIGH GROUND
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me and the gf, shagged her for a good 2 hours haha
>>
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>>52707199
YOU UNDERESTIMATE MY POWER
>>
you got the time mate?
>>
>>52707335
shut up
>>
>>52707335
It's a good 2 hours after 05:40
>>
>>52707339

you should automatically know the time in London to be honest. It's literally GMT
>>
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>classy
eh

>sexy af
ye
>>
>>52707179

picked the french whore. No thanks to any of you cunts
>>
>>52706923
what did you fight
>>
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>back from fighting evil lads
>phew that was an exhausting one haha
>can put my sword away for tonight though thank the gods
>>
I will put you through a fucking wall
>>
Done big cums
>>
>>52707486
a villainous monster
cant go into detail or theyll start targeting you for knowing too much x
>>
>this melt and his fedora gimmick
>>
>>52707513
evil is dangerous i feel indebted to the good madam for fighting it erstwhile on mine behalf
>>
>>52707557
says the godless republican
>>
>>52707539
i wanna help though i own a katana and an anglo-indian sword from the 19th century :c
>>
>>52707577
how would being an atheistic believer in an equal and meritocratic society have anything to do with that?
>>
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Is "tis" the fedora of the word world?
>>
>>52707581
youd have to find cheap lodging in the home counties somewhere because every reptilian ne'er-do-well seems to gravitate towards me for convenience
very gallant of you to offer though but im not sure you could keep up (im a very physically talented individual) and ooh it does wreak havoc on one's social life x
>>
How hard is it to find marijuana in your area
>>
>>52707640
no lots of people use "tis" here casually
>>
>>52707680
i dont have a social life and im good at football senpai

i could stay with you C: as we battle ne'er do wells and icky monsters in the eternal manichean war between good (us) vs evil (thems)

im ready!!
>>
>>52707681

I wouldn't know, I'm not a degenerate. I get drunk when I don't wanna deal with life, like a fucking adult
>>
>>52707760
>I get drunk when I don't wanna deal with life, like a fucking adult
Adults don't need to become alcoholics to deal with life la
>>
Going to make a leftover turkey butty for breakfast lads.
>>
got 25 squid laying idol
my buy some shit i dont need and wont use like the rest of the west
>>
>>52707818

go fuck yourself, desu
>>
>>52707751
i already have to cater for the needs of a talking cat and commission a new uniform every few weeks, im not paying for another destitute housemate -_-

anyway youll deffo get in the way of my purifying monsters and purging the evil energy from their souls if nothing else x
>>
>>52707845
Wish I could mate
>>
>these melts and their rp
>>
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>>52707913
I WONT GET IN THE WAY SENPAI!! i can pay my own way and rent plus im great with cats and im really good at cooking and sewing : )

pls let me help you fight evil in all its forms senpai pretty pls! i practice everyday with my swords and ive already encountered evil spirits that live less than a mile from my house and defeated them in cold and bloody combat

i can help you senpai, it must be hard fighting alone :\
>>
>>52707958
>Howdy dudes I'm like so totally loving my sgooder ya'll
>>
Forecast was a bit off on the temperature haha
>>
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Turkey for lunch it is then
>>
>>52708076
oh i have the eyes of a hawk and the ears of a fox and long delicious slender legs, i can cope just fine on me own (im even a crack shot with a longbow to protect myself at range)

i'll be square with you, ive been in the business for 7 years. im a seasoned veteran of the guerrilla war on cosmic injustice, and no amount of shitty irish E's (industry slang for "evils" or monsters) could prepare you for the danger we as a county face here in the southeast!

having the weight of a potential death always looming over my conscience would hamper my performance if anything. youd have to be pret-ty snazzy with your little katana to satisfy me! x
>>
wanna spaff on Taylor's flat chest ngl
>>
>Photos of 'rina in a bikini don't exist on the internet

Not sure how she's managed this 2bh
>>
just watched Primer, pretty strange film
>>
>>52708419
By being so plain and unpopular that nobody ever forgettable to take them.
>>
Do you ever stop and wonder at how much of a sociopath you are, I mean you're on 4chan for one thing so obviously you're not much for friends in real life, not that you don't have or spend time with them (though you probably don't), just that when you're with them, you're probably thinking at least in part of this place. Do you ever wonder if just a few more good things had happened to you, if the kids on the block had been kinder, if your parents had shown more genuine affection; that you might have turned out alright. Or is it more depressing to think that you probably had more advantages that most people and despite all that you're still rotten down to the core. The kind of weak minded and short fused brute you so often deride others for being, because its not just that they're a drain on society, which they are, its that they remind you of every negative quality about yourself.

1/2
>>
>>52708502
>those chebs

I bet people have risked their lives to try and get some snaps mate.
>>
NORMIES UPSTAIRS THUMPING ON THE FLOOR BLASTING SHIT MUSIC FOR FUCKS SAKE

I HAVE A HEADACHE NOW ITS BEEN AN HOUR OF THIS

FUCK NORMIES

THEY KNOW 5 PEOPLE LIVE RIGHT BENEATH THEM

FUCK SAKE

Honestly gonna fucking go up there and deck the Asian twat who I know is setting the music
>>
>>52708534
Then apparently you'd lose that bet.
>>
Had an allergic reaction last night lads, face went bright red and patcy

Think it was caused by a gin i'd never tried before.

Popped an anti-histamine and stopped drinking and it was gone in 40 mins.

Remember to like, comment and subscribe.
>>
lads is it a good idea to work out hardcore when you're so hungover that even moving your limbs makes you nauseous
>>
>>52708677
I usually find it helps cure the hangover
>>
Warning: If you don't make an epic, memetastic post in the next minute 2016 will be completely devoid of memes.
>>
ayy lmao
>>
>tfw family had the nerve to stay the night

s m h, got to go downstairs and interact with them AGAIN.

Just want to cobble together a left-over sandwich and fester on the sofa 2bh
>>
>>52708842
Move out of your parent's house and you can do what you like amigo
>>
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>>
>>52708842
>auntie and cousin stay over
>they have a fucking secret midnight feast every year where 90% of the leftovers we keep and don't give away, despite cooking it all are eaten by them

does my nut in 2bh. last year they ate all the fucking ham and chicken left, as well as the rest of the christmas cake. fucking just two of them. greed beyond belief.
>>
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>>52708900
Get them slim fast milkshakes for their birthdays, they'll get the picture la
>>
>>52708898
>Arab trappers

fucking lel'd at this.
>>
>>52708510
And maybe, just maybe, if you bring enough anger to bear, if you just keep distancing yourself from those people, maybe you'll wake up one day and find that you've changed. But deep down you know that shit wouldn't happen in a million years, because bad goes all the way down to the bone, and brother, you are as bad as they come. And that's what really bothers you, the idea that you'll never be good enough for anything positive that happens in your life. The idea that anyone who gets close is just too stupid to see the real you, and that's part of the reason you can't hold any real life relationships, by definition anyone who's willing to associate with a piece of shit like you isn't worth knowing. And when no one knows you, that makes you a nobody, which is the worst thing for an angry person to be, because anger needs an audience, its not enough to beat someone, it has to have been televised and shown to as many people as possible so that they can all see you're worth a damn. But you're not worth a damn, you're the same brutish piece of trash you have always been and knowing that is so many times worse than before, because before you had an excuse, you just didn't know any better. Now you do know better and you are so weak it doesn't make a difference whether or not you do know.
>>
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>>52705304
>/sp/ mod
>>
>>52708887
working on it famalam

>>52708900
that's pretty disgraceful behaviour la, have a word.
>>
>this melt and his yank flag
>>
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Bit frosty out lads. Contemplating weather to go to Co-OP today, need some food desu. Only got a few slices of bread left.
>>
>>52709014
Good name
>>
>>52709014
Bit windy out la, a lanky mong like you might get blown over.
>>
>same thread as when I went to sleep

it's me
>>52705501
got woken up at 8 and I'm tried as fuck haha
>>
Bit cold out, probably just gonna shag me bird instead of hitting the sales, see you lads in a good 2 hours.
>>
>>52708980
>>52708953
nah fuck em i just hid all of the good shit this year and left them scraps. they just went to town on the pavlova and ate like 3/4 of the remaining half of it, and the pavlova was made to serve like 25 people hahaha. it's absolutely mental.
>>
What are your new years resolutions lads?

I know it's normie-shit but surely you must have some goal or idea

For me I am going to stop drinking hard alcohol, altogether, once the clock strikes midnight (going to finish off the last half of my bottle on New Years Eve) and to no longer eat fast food
>>
>>52709061
Did someone say something? *looks around*
>>
>>52709071
I haven't slept yet, getting quite tired tbqh
>>
>>52709101
Nothing haha
>>
>>52709080
They fatties?

>>52709101
Get a better job
Get a gf
Improve fitness & lifts
>>
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>>52709101
get kgf
>>
>this melt trying to get in on the gimmick
>>
>>52709121
>Get a better job
>Get a gf
>Improve fitness & lifts
And these too, la

Going to join the gym, I'm pretty fit already (i run/walk a fuckload and eat healthy 90% of the time) so I need to get my ass there to get my ass looking sexier hahaha

No homo!
>>52709124
> Not Jap

fuck off
>>52709119
haha good la
>>
>>52709061

It's 5 miles away shorty so i'll be driving.
>>
>>52709101
get a girlfriend
>>
>>52709124

Just imagine unzipping that

I'm not big on yellow girls but she's got enough plastic to look decent
>>
>>52709116
Bad lad
At least you (probably) get to sleep all day though
>>
Off on a walk lads
>>
>>52709101
probs get a gf

i've had my fun but i'm going to be 23 and never had a serious relationship 2bh
>>
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>>52709156
>being a gay bro
bad lad

>>52709167
good lad
>>
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>>52709184
i go both ways la
>>
http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/attachment.php?attachmentid=299553&d=1395412337

haha
>>
I LOVE anime posts

not...
>>
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Fucking love these sorts of accounts lads, the state of some of the shit they post
>>
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I'm haveing a poo in McDonald's again

AMA
>>
>>52709219
why do you have a brown stain on the front of your undies la
>>
>>52709219
Mate the state of those pants

Stick them in the bin that's vile
>>
>>52709219
PLEASE don't be real.

fuck sakes /brit/.
>>
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>>52709101
Start lifting & exercising more
Don't drink as much
Stop eating shit every week
Get a new job, I'm not happy in my current one
Get a qt asian gf
>>
>>52709219

Fuck sake m8 on a Sunday! you should be in Church.
>>
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>>
>>52709263
>Implying McDonalds isn't the church of today's generation; a temple for the religion of consumerism if you will

wew, just tipped hard lads.
>>
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> The Irish
>>
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>wanking for the 4th time today since morning
>benis is hard but can't cum
>balls ache
>>
>>52709396
seek help.
>>
>>52709297
well memed
>>
>>52709396
Bad lad
>>
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>>52709276
There are people that think Jedi are based on real people?
>>
>>52709396

You need to push through the wall and keeping tugging.
>>
FUCKING BILLIONAIRES REEEEEEEEEEEE
>>
>>52709396
unscrew your willy and clean it in the sink lad
>>
Gooing to Dooing a Pooing and by Pooing i mean Sleeping WOHO!!!!!!
>>
>Gorta Mor
>>
Off to eat s fry up, wish me luck! ahha
>>
doing a fart lads
>>
>>52709476
They should give the billionaires bonuses to the bankers 2bh.
>>
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>Don't have to spend today with the family

Good 2 Be Back
>>
soldiers should be on footballers bonuses if I'm being frank with you boys
>>
>>52709628

I came back home last night m8. Felt good to sleep in my own bed again.
>>
someone stop me spending money

just bought this tbqh

http://www.selfridges.com/GB/en/cat/sandro-contrast-collar-floral-lace-dress_786-10081-R4444H/?previewAttribute=Black
>>
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In 10 SECONDS I am going to pelt everyone in this thread with one of these

10

9

8

7
>>
>>52709882
you will stop that RIGHT F*CKING NOW
>>
http://www.theguardian.com/environment/2015/dec/26/hundreds-flee-their-homes-as-englands-north-is-submerged?CMP=fb_gu

omg are u ok? x
>>
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Maisie
>>
>>52709974
yeah fine ta
>>
>>52709763
>Size: XXXL
>>
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>mfw the north gets flooded, but the south (gods true country) stays absolutely fine

Get fucked Rasheeds of the north la
>>
>tfw Northerners try and blame 'le Westminster elite' for god BTFOing them with biblical floods
>>
>>52710098
first they get flooded with pakis, then with water

absolutely biblical
>>
>>52710179
plagues of the modern world la
>>
good night ding ding ding ding ding ding
>>
just ended a life
>>
>>52710197
>>52710179
>>52710098
theres more pakis in the south btw
and the thames will flood as well
>>
>>52705304
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=vCHEPQfYtmI
ENDA
N
D
A
>tfw the epic lad banter in the dáil might be replaced by shinners next year
feels bad man
>>
>>52710328
>and the thames will flood as well
>a rasheed being this salty
>>
>the south is white
>>
>>52710339
the south is full of pakis tho
london is in the south
>>
>rorke o'clock
time for a run methinks
>>
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>the north
>humans
>>
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>>52710328
>Poortherners on full damage control

m-muh tories
>>
>>52710401
>>52710386
>>52710339
>rasheeds trying to convince us they're white because they live in the south

Lele get out
>>
>>52710386
>>52710401
rasheed my son
>>
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Cars gets 19mpg lads
>>
>>52710422
>HORRIFIC
>>
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>>52710401
>>52710422
>>52710438

Did your 50 cousins drown in the floods?
>>
How many Rasheeds browse /brit/? All the anti-paki sentiment must get pretty tiring 2bh.
>>
>>52710479
last time i checked tallaght isnt in yorkshire
>>52710482
every southerner is a rasheed
>>
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>woke up
>north is still flooded
>more heavy rain expected
>>
>>52710401
>>52710422
>this is the best response poortherners can muster

does your lifejacket go on over your bomb vest or the other way around?
>>
>>52710364
Nope, pakistanis live in Yorkshire, Birmingham, Manchester and Liverpool. London has people of every nation and isn't a good example of anything, the south (south of London, the real south) has eastern Europeans, Koreans, Hindus and Sikhs from India, and Filipinos. I meet more Palestinians and Iranians than i do Pakistanis and there isnt many of them. The only example I know of that might buck the trend is Crawley.
>>
>>52710518
t. rasheed
>>
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>THE PROUD NORTHERN CITY OF ATLANTIS
>>
>>52705655
Me in the middle
>>
>>52710538
>the proud so*thern city of islamabad
>>
>>52710482
Peoples priorities on who are socially acceptable migrants are fucked up anyway.

>Tyrone, Rasheed & Naveed
>Raise crime rates, stick to their own culture, bring backwards ass religions that should have died in the medieval ages with them & shit music
>Yeah these guys are alright, #notalllmuslims #illridewithyou #whatdirectionismeccabruv
>See an oriental on the street
>statistically more likely to have a good paying job, contribute to society etc
>casual racism out of the ass
>>
>>52710518

never seen any sizeable amount of pakis or blacks in liverpool desu
>>
>>52710518
>suddenly proud of multiculturalism

southerners always moving the goalposts kek
>>
>northeners try to deny that literally all their cities are filled with pakis

pathetic, not like they're even redeemable by being nice
>>
>>52710569
>out of the ass

Howdy pardner.
>>
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>>52710605
arse* :^)
>>
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>>
>Don't worry about submitting your meter reading this time.
A meter reader will be sent to your address shortly.
>>
delete this piece of shit thread im tired of seeing the OP picture in the catalogue thanks
>>
http://strawpoll.me/6373634
>>
>>52710482
i don't take it to heart, i know its all ironic racism, a social-commentary on ukip voters sort of thing :)
>>
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>alri flower, me n t'lads are off down pob, don't weet op
>>
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Definitive proof
>>
Need a bf to cuddle with
>>
>>52710658
>west country
>southern
>>52710682
bit gay m8
>>
>>52710682
>tfw straight but willing to go gay after jeremy from peep show made going gay seem very normal and casual
>>
What's wet and brown?

Your average northerner
>>
>>52710693
yellow is south m8, there is no west in england
>>
>>52710658
>that black area south of glasgow

the fuck? is that a refugee camp or something
>>
>Poortherners have literally been bantered out of the thread

we were only joking lads, dry your eyes
>>
Want to suck a fat dick desu
>>
tfw no mio gf
>>
>>52710717
They probably ran out of bandwidth for today
>>
>>52710711
west country is distinct from the rest of the south tho
>>52710701
whats called rasheed and poops in streets
you
>>
there is absolutely nothing wron with not being white
>>
>>52710751
either that or the water level's reached the router
>>
>be from the south
>sound gay
>be proud that you live in some soulless commuter village 48 minutes away from London

not mirin 2bh
>>
>>52710765
rasheed
my son
>>
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>poortherners right now
>>
>>52710768
>tfw scared of going back to uni because the entire town is going to be flooded
>>
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sad lads
>>
Girls on tumblr like "im so spititual" while being spiritual in itself would mean you wouldn't use tumblr or even dare to boast about being spiritual.
>>
G O D-tier: South

Mid-tier: North

leper-tier: '''''''Midlands'''''''''
>>
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>>
>poortherners literally left the thread en masse because they couldn't hack the banter

like rats escaping a sinking ship... fitting
>>
new
>>52710831
>>
>>52710794
fuck off yank
i can't believe you guys actually bother posting in /brit/ when i talk to americans irl its like talking to a brick wall that has got learning difficulties

you're all completely inept at picking up subtleties or irony, unless its spoonfed to you like 'statement... NOT', seriously I try to banter with americans and they just stare back blankly, its like you have bones in your brain.
>>
Portsmouth desu
>>
Northerners on suicide watch.
>>
>>52710842
janny will have u lad
>>
>>52710863
Shit hole.
>>
why do all southerners sound as though they have buttplugs in?
>>
>Be Southerner
>lack anything interesting about my life but I sound like a BBC-newsreader without trying and my mum shops at waitrose so i feel all smug
>>
>>52710857
>i can't believe you guys actually bother posting in /brit/ when i talk to americans irl its like talking to a brick wall that has got learning difficulties
>you're all completely inept at picking up subtleties or irony, unless its spoonfed to you like 'statement... NOT', seriously I try to banter with americans and they just stare back blankly, its like you have bones in your brain.

this
>>
luckily for poortherners, years of inbreeding them has given them incredible mutations that makes them able to live underwater such as webbed appendages and gills
>>
>be from the south
>be gay
>have a multitude of foreigners for neighbours
>>
people I dont like on suicide watch
>>
>Be Northerner
>Think because i'm poor and have a speech impediment ('''''''''''accent'''''''''''), i'm interesting
>>
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>be from the south
>talk like an actual homosexual
>put on a fake cockney accent when i want to be intimidating
>>
All these southerners getting angry because jamal cucks their bfs
>>
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>Northerners still trying to return banter when they are literally floating on an air mattress down the M6
>>
people that live in a different region of my country on suicide watch
>>
>be southerner
>go for a £18 shandy with your bf
>get stabbed to death by a muslim

average day
>>
Northerners don't come South desu, not many at all in London. Think they get BTFO in job interviews and generally, because of their accents. It's a shame 2bh.
>>
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>Southerner's catching a boost because they live in some cookie-cutter suburban town slightly more proximal to london than people in other parts of the country
>>
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>>52711056
fuck sake lad comedy gold first post thats made me laugh irl in quite a while
>>
>>52711065
I went to the south once

it's just as big a shithole as the north but everything is more expensive an we have better national parks

southerners are just memeing
>>
>>52711069
*that isn't currently underwater
>>
>>52711106
this, literally the only place of note in the South is London itself
>>
>>52711121
it's drowned in a sea of its own mundanity desu
>>
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>be from the north
>travel down the m62 in your local pub
>>
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>>52711106
>>52711069
>>52711125

>this feeble attempt at damage control
>>
>>52711125
The only place of note in the UK*
>>
>>52711065
We have to come down south to shag all the women you wont because you're all massive benders
>>
>>52711172
ayer's rock is the only place of note in straya so don't get too cocky m8.
>>
>>52711165
nice counterargument there jamaal
>>
>>52711148
>Poortherner """"banter"""""
>>
I know people say the north is a sinking ship but this is too far!!
>>
>northern lads
>interested in sports, drinking/going out and regularly sleeping with women

>southern lads
>interested in their proximity to london, can't afford to get drunk, their boyfriend and his enriching cultural background
>>
>>52711207
southerner banter is just drinking too many shandys and daring other men to give you handjobs
>>
>Be from t'North
>grow up, live and die in some desolate post-industrial shithole
>Earn below the national average, be overweight and unhealthy
>Never travel the world
>Sit on the ''''''''settee''''''''' and watch ITV television for six hours a night
>Try (and fail) to banter Southern ubermesnch on /brit/ constantly
>>
>>52711196
If Sydney got nuked our country could still function, we have numerous other cities of similar size and economic importance.

All your eggs are literally in 1 (one) basket, your country would be Romania tier without London.
>>
>>52711279
>Sydney

Literally who?
>>
>>52711261
most poortherners can't afford to travel to other countries but now that their caravan doubles up as a boat it should be a lot easier
>>
stop this

i thought /brit/ was a bunker from the JFs
>>
>>52711261
You think they calculate the national average from just what southerners make?

You don't actually know what the word NATIONAL means?

Southerner education
>>
>>52711325
>being this dense

Northern eduction in action everyone.
>>
>>52711293
Literally more important than any city in Europe aside from London.
>>
>>52711279
yes because your country relies on minerals out in the desert.
>>52711261
>Be from South
>grow up in some soulless commuter town
>Pay extortionate prices for everything, be homosexual and surrounded by foreigners
>Never have to travel the world because they've all moved in next door
>Sit on the train and commute back and forth from london for 6 hours a day
>Try (and fail) to bring some fun to your otherwise mundane and vapid life by shitposting on /brit/

wew lad,
>>
>>52711360
memes = reality: the post
>>
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>>52711355
>Caliphate of paris
>not Europe
>>
>where should I build my house
>ah yes, the flood plains, excellent
northerners
>>
>Australians genuinely believe they're not completely irrelevant

fucking wew
>>
>>52711388
We're above them you retard
>>
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>>52711390
>>
>>52711390
>How close can I afford to live to London
>Ah this barn only 1 hours from london, excellent
>>
My sexuality is no longer clearly defined lads

Bit of a pickle
>>
>be southerner
>wake up at 4am for your journey into london to your soulless office job
>arrive at 11am due to traffic
>your boss sanjeet is mad at you
>cry on the phone to your bf
>drink 6 shandys in your lunch break
>completely pissed
>get sacked for saying something slightly non PC
>jump off the white cliffs of dover

average day for a southerner
>>
>>52711360
*grow up in some soulless commuter town that isn't currently underwater

>>52711430
*and isn't underwater
>>
>>52711452
flooded by foreigners instead lad
>>
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>Be poortherner
>drown
>>
you're both shitholes
>>
>>52711450

>be northerner
>look at fetal alcohol syndrome face in the mirror
>want to die
>step outside
>washed away
>>
>be southern
>pay £2000 a month to live in a wardrobe
>>
>northerner recreation
>great outdoors, up and coming music scenes, great pubs and great british food

>southerner recreation
>shopping at department stores and M&S to feel good about yourself
>>
>ah, this seems like a fine place to build my house
>>
>>52711488
*a wardrobe not currently underwater

>>52711489
>northerner recreation
>scuba diving, swimming, snorkelling, kayaking, drowning
>>
>>52711503
>ah, this is enough room from me, and only an hours commute!
>>
Haha lads was accidentally in the "much heritage" yank thread
>>
>>52711524
at least we are only temporarily underwater

you will always be flooded with homos and foreigners
>>
>>52711531
eyup duck, av a look a tha, en-suite!

aye, n its only hour commute by submarine
>>
>be northerner
>wake up at 4am
>time to sign on again
>can't afford a car
>gotta get the bus
>bus loads of other northerners going to the job centre
>finally one with space comes past
>it's 11am and you're late
>get sanctioned by Wojtek
>'bloody tories bloody thatcher m-muh milk m-muh mines m-muh bennies'
>get bus back
>sit in front garden on plastic chairs sipping warm cider cans
>daughter comes home from school
>come on now, it's time for your meeting with rasheed
>'but daddy this is a horrific betrayal'
>'i know love, but it must be done'

average day for a northerner
>>
>>52711555
>this bottom of the barrel banter

doesn't really work when you're equally as flooded with pakis does it mate
>>
>Be Northern
>wake up in the morning and eat some oats from the red cross food parcel
>put on my flat cap and walk down t'mine
>Realise the mine closed decades ago
>huff glue and drink high-strength lager
>wank to the idea of being a Southerner
>starts raining
>swim home to my terraced tenement house in time for X Factor

Standard day in the life of a Northerner.
>>
>>52711637
>bus

don't you mean boat?
>>
>>52711659
our pakis are integrated though they are basically british they have some top banter

the pakis down south are fresh off the dinghy from syria
>>
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>He's not from the midlands
>>
The Midlands is like some runt F.A.S. baby that neither parent wants.
>>
>>52711710
>our pakis are integrated though

not hard mate, you've got paki culture up north
>>
>>52711710
the pakis up north don't even have to get out the dinghy
>>
>>52711737
>not as depressing as the north
>not as gay as the south

literally winning my man
>>
>>52711788
>just as depressing as the north
>gayer than the south

they have the worst of both worlds
>>
Bed bugs and now mosquitos

Fucking FANTASTIC
>>
>>52711788
it's just an amalgamation of the two

it's depressing AND gay
>>
>>52711807
>gayer than the south
soz mate not even here are people licking back expensive shandies with their black boyfriend, that's a southern thing as far as i know.
>>
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>the norths contribution to the world
>>
>>52711832
I go to uni in Nottingham and its way worse than London for shit like that pal
>>
>>52711865
never been to nottingham desu benefit of living in the midlands is anywhere you don't like you can just write off as being too far north or south :^)
>>
>>52711893
haha cheeky
>>
>The North

Not even once.
>>
Anyone want to bum me? I've been told by multiple people I have an exceptional bottom
Thread replies: 393
Thread images: 79
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