>Wake up in Australia >It's another temperate day
You are currently reading a thread in /int/ - International
>Wake up in Australia
>It's another temperate day with low humidity, shorts and shirtless weather
>Turn on news, another report of a sunk boat, economy numbers booming, another shooting in America, be proud of your sensible laws
>Have some meatpies and protein shakes
>All of your sikkunt m8s wake up in the house you share together
>Head off to the gym which is filled with hot anglo shelias, add mad gains with a quick split
>Go to class at your pristine modern local uni, attend class outside in a nice open terrace with a warm breeze blowing in
>Some Finnish exchange student is calling you an Auslard and bitching about houses, give him a mad wedgie and tell him to fuark off to poofland
>Stop by your relaxed part-time job after class to do a few hours of work and get paid 40 dollars an hour for it
>Head home and relax online, hang out with your fellow Brits from the UK and NZ because you're senpaitachi
>Post online and everyone likes you because of your flag and everyone but maybe some Bali shopkeepers likes Australia
>Walk out after sundown in the tropical mild night shirtless with the gang and crawl through epic beachfront parties until midnight
>>52443459
Seems accurate. Quality post m8
>>52443459
Why are you such an Australian ass licker, dude. You really need to hop off their dicks asap.
australia's pretty based
>>52443459
Even though you're memeing, this is genuinely what it's like to live in Australia. I mean I've had days like that.
>>52443506
American mouths are made for Aussie dicks
>>52443459
>her pink nipple is behind the lower star in the Southern Cross.
>>52443459
>>52443459
>>Stop by your relaxed part-time job after class to do a few hours of work and get paid 40 dollars an hour for it
unironically get paid more than that to tutor 5 hours a week
>>52443459
would rape 2bh.
why makes australian so rape-able?
>>52443589
>I will never be tutored by an (preferably attractive) Aussie
>>52443622
what*
>>52443589
>tfw got paid $25/h to sit behind the counter of a bottleshop and occasionally refill fridges when I was 18
I love this country
>>52443668
Oh shit he's online now, I hope he see's I included him in the OP
>>52443668
who /1/ hdi here
Pretty accurate 2bh
>you will never hang out with your fellow Brits from the UK and NZ because you're senpaitachi
>>52443459
This is actually pretty accurate
U beautay
I wanna move to straya, is it hard for a white redhead to get in and get a chill job?
>>52445191
FULL
>>52445191
No, not really. Just make sure you're resume is good, your visa legit and make sure you can fund a cheap place to stay, coz you'll be likely on minimum wage
>>52443459
>Be Australian
>Download porn
>Get arrested
>>52445226
t. Chong
>>52445245
Perth or Darwin?
>>52445317
>be american
>get shot
>>52445320
>Perth
>cheap
>>52443459
sauce?
>>52445320
Darwin for the weather. Tropical af which means you'll be sweaty all the time if your pale.
Perth for the livability. Nice part of the country with awesome surrounding areas like Margaret River. Also is fair cheaper than a lot of other Aussie cities
>>52445377
>Be Australian
>Get Skin Cancer
>go to America for treatment
>Get shot
Are wedgies real?
I've never heard of someone performing one in real life, only in The Simpsons.
Just seems an incredibly embarrassing thing for the person doing the act to do.
>>52444827
here lad
>>52445404
Noice. Thanks m8
>>52445320
Go east coast.
But out of those two, Perth is much better.
>>52443459
>downright draconian gun laws
>air rifles are banned
>airsoft is banned
>LASER pointers are banned
>fucking YO YO WATERBALLS are banned
>smokeless tobacco is banned
>need a helmet to ride a fucking bicycle
>plain packaging on cigarettes
>absurdly high taxation on alcohol and cigarettes, most cuckfailians have to drink shitty goonbags because it's all they can afford
>many violent games and movies banned
>video games are expensive as shit
>no self defense allowed
>realize that my country treats its citizens like retarded children
Australia is like that one retarded kid you knew from school whose parents made him wear a safety helmet at home and covered the electrical sockets with safety covers because he'd stick a fork in them.
Just move there m8. America doesn't want or need you.
>>52445549
>getting cucked by bourgie over some ciggies and his cawwadoodie
>>52445634
pls go socialist cancer
>>52445521
Any cities in mind?
>giving a wedgie to Finn
>bullying
>a Finn
And they say that Finns are the most suicidal folk in the world. Or maybe the Strayan's are just stupid?
>>52445672
srry i don't wanna contribute to ur paradise where u play call of duty at home but on the streets u playin resident evil 5 on the hardest difficulty and by that i mean shooting at destitute black people who eventually kill ur dum ass
>>52445425
...Why would we go to America for treatment? Half the time, they just cut it off with a scalpel, it's no biggie.
>>52445728
Then please go to ausfailia. We need less berniecucks
>>52445782
hahahaha holy shit you actually see that as paradise
I'm gonna be honest, i want to get into Guns. this country would be perfect if it weren't for the shitty gun laws.
>>52445829
OUTRIGHT
DRACONIAN
GUN
LAWS
OUR
RIGHTS
SHALL
NOT
BE
INFRINGED
STAND
YOUR
GROUND
>>52443459
>>Some Finnish exchange student is calling you an Auslard and bitching about houses, give him a mad wedgie and tell him to fuark off to poofland
lol
>>52445728
>by that i mean shooting at destitute black people who eventually kill ur dum ass
That literally never happens.
>>52445549
Did you happen to go to Canada recently?
>>52445887
s-sorry senpai
>>52445819
just go cuck. nobody wants you
>>52443459
>>Some Finnish exchange student is calling you an Auslard and bitching about houses, give him a mad wedgie and tell him to fuark off to poofland
Wouldn't recommend it
>be australian
i'm jelly
>>52445829
I think the only reason NZ exists is to show up our laws for the citizen disarmament bullshit they are.
Get into shooting anyway. The more numbers we have, the better.
>>52446354
We love (aeroplane) jelly.
>>52445699
Sydney, but shits expensive. Brisbane and Gold Coast are nice.
> "Australia"
Becomes gun control thread.
'Murifats pls
>>52446578
Nah, it's just this one fag. I think it might be Riley, what state did he live in again? I think this guy lives in either Wyoming or Oregon.
>>52443459
This is unironically accurate. 10/10 my anglo m8.
>>52445320
I prefer Darwin, which is why I live there. But most people won't enjoy it because of how shit the weather is sometimes and it's rather small for a city. If you're used to city life you'd hate it.
I used to live in WA when I was younger but my family left because it is a complete nanny state and drove us all mad.
Darwin is also absurdly expensive to live in, but the country/rural lifestyle is the best you'll find in the country.
>>52445829
Do it. The process of getting guns is much more daunting when you just look at it. You'll probably be surprised how easy it is to get into it. We need the numbers.
Unless you live in WA, then move to a different state and then get into guns.
>>52445549
Hey the Cali beaner iraq """vet""" is here again.
Still jelly about my country? You don't have to be fuming mad every day of the week.
>>52447903
Lmao is he actually a mexicunt? I remember he fucking nutted when people started bantering him and wrote like a paragraph tangent on why he can't hack banter
>>52447903
>implying I'm from cali or a vet
Top fucking retard m8. I'm not even a spic.
There are multiple people on this board who think your country is a joke
>>52448161
>so butthurt about bad behaviour on 4chan/int/ he makes retarded paragraph long statements where it becomes obvious that because of his asperger syndrome he has confused memes with the real world
>>52448161
Sorry I fucked your sister before you got to, m8.
Just a jape ;^)
>>52448161
Yeah and none of them can handle our BIG BOGAN BANTER
>>52448259
>gets triggered and replies every time
Lmao. The sad thing is that copypasta is sadly true. Your country is a massive authoritarian shithole. Enjoy getting perpetually treated like a fucking child by your nanny government, auscuck.
>>52448338
You can't eat kinder eggs nor fuck prostituted so like ummm .... Nice try sweetheart x :)
>>52448338
>and replies every time
>my first reply to thread
>>52448338
>Government can't even trust you to eat without choking to death
>>52448364
lel prostitution is legal in my state, cuck. prostitution laws vary on a state by state basis. The vast majority of nanny state laws in cuckfailia are applied on a federal level
>kinder eggs
nigger you can't even own a yo yo waterball
Christ is that anti-Aussie American here again
What the fuck is his problem
>>52448399
>calling me a nigger
Stop projecting
>>52448399
>Be american
>Try to eat food
>Start to choke to death
>Call 911
>Get shot
>>52448386
>his government can't trust him to ride a bike and not without a helmet
>or choke himself with a yo yo
>or fucking let his retarded child burn down his house because he was attracted to a novelty toy lighter
>>52448419
Even better
>be American
>get shot
>go to the hospital
>get shot by a cop
http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/suspect-fatally-shot-police-inside-california-hospital-35870668
>>52448446
and not die*
>>52448419
>be an auscuck
>accidentally strange yourself with a rubber toy
>>52448446
>His government can't trust him to eat food
It cannot be fabricated.
>>52448412
>>52448454
And it's that self-hating libtard from Texas or some shit.
Go back to fucking your cousins in the NT, retard. Get out of America, berniecuck.
>>52448514
Literally what? I'm black, I have no cousins in Australia and don't support Bernie
>>52448514
>Beaner projecting this hard after an Aussie fucked his sister before he could.
If it makes you feel any better she was pretty loose.
>>52448485
Your government can't trust you with a rubber toy m8. It's only inevitable before they require you to bubble wrap your house so you can be more safe.
>>52448542
>I'm black
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
>>52448542
>he's a nigher
Good. Go to cuckfailia pls. We need less dindus in America.
>>52448547
>he's still triggered and continues to reply to my pasta everytime
Hit too close to home m8?
daily remider that the arseblasted american is black
>>52448606
>being black
top jej
>>52448619
>australian """"""""""""reading comprehension""""""""""""""""""""
>>52448606
action summary of thread:
>vague australia affiliated OP
>fag copy pastes thing
>people disagree with it
>U MAD? U MAD U MAD Y U REPLY Y U SO MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD
great thread
>>52448650
HOLY FUCK this DAMAGE CONTROL
>>52445549
>guns
who cares
>tobacco and alcohol
who cares
>>52443535
may b your mons is
>>52448652
>people disagree with it
The only retort I've seen is >m-muh eggs or replies trying to rationalize your authoritarian laws m8. No auskek has actually denied his country beong a massive nanny state because it's true.
>>52448673
lmao fucking right on cunt
>australia may have an objectively better quality of life but m-muh guns!!!
>>52448702
i deny it because i can fuck prostitutes on a federal level, get on the lash when i'm 18, fire shotguns on my grandparents farm while NOT being shot, buy games because there's an R18 rating (or just buy them online), and so like ummm ... nice try sweetheart :) x
>>52448673
>>52448717
lel my ppint exactly.
>m-muh better quality of life
Fucking meaningless when I live in a padded room where my government treats me like a toddler unable to make my own decisions. Yeah I live a comfy life, at the expense of being free to do jack fucking shit m8.
>>52448758
>Fucking meaningless when I live in a padded room where my government treats me like a toddler unable to make my own decisions. Yeah I live a comfy life, at the expense of being free to do jack fucking shit m8.
beats getting shot to death
>>52448758
>Fucking meaningless when I live in a padded room where my government treats me like a toddler unable to make my own decisions
but that's ahh not an accurate depiction of daily life here at all
in fact gun ownership is now up to the level it was before the regulation thing happened
>>52448758
i don't think you understand the minimal level of interference the government has in our day to day lives. regardless i'd rather live in a "padded room" (as you put it) if it meant having a world class quality of life
>>52448758
Yeah that would make it pretty meaningless.
What's it like? Living in a padded room?
Must be alright, they unfortunately trusted you internet.
>>52448734
prostitution is legal in my state too
alcohol is cheap as fuck too and not taxed to shit, only downside is the 21 age limit, I'll give you that
gun laws are far superior to yours
plus weed is legalized in my state
gg f a m
>>52448758
>jack fucking shit is the same as not owning guns and smoking
You can:
read
go outside and play sports
work out
shoot the piss with your friends
fuck your girl
watch tv
play most vidya
do basically everything besides shoot and smoke
@52448758
>let me tell you about your own country
>>52448758
dude like the one thing I can't get in Australia is guns and lmao who cares
i'm 90% you're baiting now anyway but in case amerifats have reached a new level of autism i'll respond seriously
>>52448784
>in fact gun ownership is now up to the level it was before the regulation thing happened
this lmao. if i actually fucking cared i could get a gun.
>>52448809
based
>>52448809
NO MY GUNS
I NEED GUNS
I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT RUBBING GUNS ON MUH CHODE
ABNRUGHABHEFBWEBH GUNNSSSS
He's pretty sad desu baka senpai
>>52448776
>beats getting shot to death
If I lived in cuckfailia and couldn't leave, I'd probably want to get shot and die.
>>52448784
>ahh but that's not an accurate description of life at all
Everything in Cuckfailia that poses the slightest bit of danger is either banned, heavily regulated or taxed to shit.
>>52448796
>minimal interference
o im laffin
https://www.ipa.org.au/publications/1926/new-poll-more-australians-agree-we-are-becoming-a-nanny-state-70-think-food-tobacco-alcohol-plain-packs-ineffective
>>52448879
>sensible laws
Stopped reading right there
>>52448829
You also can't have access to cheap drinks, tobacco, smokeless tobacco, air rifles, airsoft, yoyo waterballs, and laser pointers amongst other things. Also you still ban a good amount of games, lol
>>52448968
and most importantly
>HELMET TO RIDE A FUCKING BICYCLE
>>52448968
What the fuck, I own a laser pointer? Also any idiot can get a banned game in Australia.
If these are literally the only negatives to living in my country I think that's a pretty good thing anyway lmao.
Also the alcohol thing is only a problem for poorfags like Americans, everyone here can afford it fucking easily.
>>52448879
still minimal interference if all it is is the packaging of cigarettes
>>52448807
>plus weed is legalized in my state
lol fuck off degenerate
>>52448968
you are literally MULTITUDES more likely to get murdered in america and you're trying to give us shit about some of those things being harder to acquire? oh no!
Ahhh America,
where people are so """"patriotic"""" they are willing to go to war against their own nation.
Where you can sign up and die overseas, yet not consume alcohol.
Where you can get put into jail for being forced into sex by a pimp.
Where you cannot be trusted with kinder surprise, but can be with a firearm.
Where you are free to carry and shoot in any public space when someone rustles your jimmies.
Where you are free to be spied on by your own nation.
> land of the free, home of the brave
Kind of ironic I think.
>>52448991
I've never understood how this is even that bad. Do you guys complain about seatbelt laws too?
>>52449114
>own a laser pointer
Probably the cucked happy meal shit that's less than one milliwatts, right? Anything higher is banned, so most types of laser pointers are b& lel
>also the alcohol thing is only a problem for poorfags
http://www.news.com.au/finance/money/why-do-we-pay-so-much-for-alcohol/news-story/1647c23acc476553ade5d77774b8fa7d
JUST
>Be American
>Enjoy holiday in the amazing and vastly superior country, Australia
>Fly back home to your shithole
>Forget to remove your life threatening chocolate eggs from your pockets
>Get fined $3000 per egg and become another world leading incarceration statistic
>"f-f-f-fucking aussrala set me up! ;;___:"
>Find out while you were in prison, an brave honest Australian fucked your sister
>Go on hourly rants for weeks on end about your favourite country so that people will reply to you and make the pain of Jamal's cock go away
>>52449140
>still minimal interference
Still far more than here :^)
>>52449165
>multitudes more likely
Iirc the homicide rate on america is like 3-4x the Australian rate.
That isn't multitudes, and that's only on a relative basis. Not an absolute risk. Look at the absolute risk of getting murdered in America and it's extremely tiny.
>free to be spied upon
Actually warantless NSA spying expired this past June. And you are massively expanding your mass surveilleance, auskek.
http://www.bbc.com/news/world-australia-34513124
also your freedom of speech is shit too.
http://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2015/oct/19/new-south-wales-hate-speech-laws-to-clamp-down-on-violent-extremists
>>52449324
holy fuck. This actually happened to me except I wasn't arrested, but TSA took away my kinder eggs and my girlfriend cheated on me while I was in australia.
>>52449251
I live in a secondary enforcement state so I don't have to.
>>52443459
ah so just like south africa without the roving bands of genocidal niggers then?
>>52446120
shitty bate
>>52449660
No, exactly!
The genocidal niggers live in the US.
>>52446633
who the fuck is this riley int keeps talking about?
>>52448807
>it was a stoner sloth all along
Holy shit stop posting
>>52448639
need that ointment for the butthurt
>tfw you will never be an Aussie
>tfw your ancestors had so many opportunities to make the journey
>tfw they didn't take any of them
>tfw condemned to watch the slow death of Britain and Europe first hand
bait
>>52449886
Check that privilege. You get to experience cultural enrichment. You will accept Mohammad's penis and you will celebrate it.
>Wake up in America
>get shot
>korea
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Wq-ku3AwTA
>>52449273
I don't know what you're going on about with laser pointers I own one that can be seen on mountains and if you told people they were banned they'd be surprised, it's sad that a toy is one of your biggest criticisms
>>52449390
C U C K E D
U
C
K
E
D
>>52448968
We don't ban games, a few were banned for a bit because we didn't have any classification above 15+ but now we do.
DUDE
GUNS
LMAO
>I will never be australian
Just kill me already
love you guys
>>52443459
10/10.
I know this is supposed to be a joke, but that literally describes what life is like here. I'm so god damned happy I was born in this country.
>>52443459
>be me American
>WAKE ME UP
>CANT WAKE UP
>WAKE ME UPINSIDE
>WONT WAKE UP
>SAVE ME FROM THIS HELL
>Be Australian
>WAKE ME UP (at 7:00 am to go to work)
> :DDD
must suck being americunt lol.
I have more memes if youre interested, go to my blog, know your meme(d o t)com for more memes I pretty much in my own respect started.
>>52451474
Come home, Iberian man.
>>52451474
T. Alberta Barbosa (Jr.)
>>52445549
>>downright draconian gun laws
They're pretty similar to most civilised countries. While I personally agree with the American gun laws, ours are nothing out of the ordinary.
>>airsoft is banned
who fucking cares
>LASER pointers are banned
Only the really powerful ones, the ones capable of blinding a pilot. I have no qualm with this, they contribute no positive besides dumb fun and have dangerous negatives so the ban is fine IMO
>smokeless tobacco is banned
Yeah, fuck our vape laws. I don't vape, but to ban it is dumb as fuck.
>need a helmet to ride a fucking bicycle
I see this as the same as a seatbelt law, it's not a hassle at all and provides safety. There's no negatives to this law so the positives outweigh it.
>>plain packaging on cigarettes
And? It helps remove the advertising element on tobacco and has helped lower the levels of smoking, providing public health benefits. Again, there's no cons, so the pros outweigh them.
>absurdly high taxation on alcohol
This isn't that bad, the more heavily taxed drinks are shitty sweet cruisers and the like that are designed for children anyway. Helps reduce underage drinking while generating revenue for the state, from people with shit taste, to be redistributed to other projects.
>and cigarettes
Yeah, nah, fuck these tobacco prices.
I used to smoke Marlboro Red but they're too expensive now. I exclusively smoke Champion Ruby these days and prefer it over anything else really, so it's not that bad. I know it's much cheaper elsewhere, but $26 dollars for a 25 gram pouch that will last me two weeks is fine.
>>many violent games and movies banned
Not an issue anymore. With the introduction of the R18+ rating for video games everything's fine.
>video games are expensive as shit
Yes, but only for console babbies, so I don't care. Steam is fine.
>>no self defense allowed
We honestly don't even need it. We have no Jamals ruining towns. You can always learn a martial art if you're that worried
>Be american
>Traveling in Australia
>Looking for impact craters like all your previous vacations
>Flying airplanes around every now and then
>Presidential Medal of science
>life is good
>Driving in the outback with your wife
>Head on car crash
>Get killed.
Australia should have people drive on the normal side of the road. One of the few crazy things about them.
>>52451729
>>need a helmet to ride a fucking bicycle
>I see this as the same as a seatbelt law, it's not a hassle at all and provides safety. There's no negatives to this law so the positives outweigh it.
yuropoors don't need helmets and yet they're safer than we are
requiring a helmet takes all the convenience out of a bicycle so people just don't bother riding
though that's probably the intention, like all our gun laws - nothing to do with safety and everything to do with controlling our behaviour & culture
>>52443780
>>52452081
>requiring a helmet takes all the convenience out of a bicycle so people just don't bother riding
I don't agree with this at all. People don't ride bicycles because none of our roads or cities are designs to accommodate it to the extent that european cities. Everyone hates cyclists because they're always in the way of cars because of this city design. Convenience really isn't an issue, just wear a backpack and put your helmet in there.
Helmets protect from fucking magpies too.
>>52452081
>>requiring a helmet takes all the convenience out of a bicycle so people just don't bother riding
>Hey bro you want to ride our bikes to the shop?
>Nah m8 putting this thing on my head is inconvenient
Said literally no one ever. Take your VPN off.
>>52452486
and drop bears
>>52445320
B R I S B A N E
R
I
S
B
A
N
E
>>52448776
as long as you stay away from inner citys you'll be fine, overall the crime and gun violence is pretty low, its just places like Chicago with Iraq tier violence that are bad.
>>52445549
everyone here does banned shit anyway. There's no cunts to give a fuck. I don't even own a helmet, ciggies have the gross diseasy pictures on them still and pc-master race is unbanable
Australia is what the US could have been if it had only stayed part of the empire and not rebelled like the nation equivilent of an autistic child throwing a tantrum
