Can we have a thread sharing moments of astounding autism by historical figures? In reading about Aquinas I came upon a snippet about his life and thought, my god, that is absolutely autistic. I mean, imagine doing this right now at some dinner.
>From 1252 he taught in Paris. There is a story of him dining at the court of Louis IX (St Louis) and passing the meal sunk in abstraction while the social butterflies gossiped around him. Then suddenly Thomas concluded his lucubrations, brought his great fist crashing down upon the table, and declared: “That will settle the Manicheees.”
>>1319498
He was also a shitty autist because he came up with nothing useful
I think Claudius hiding behind a curtain from the Praetorian guard so he does not have to become emperor qualifies.
>>1319498
That's good because Saint Louis of France was also a gigantic autist. His wedding night, his wife was all over him and started to get down to fuck, when he fled from the day because according to an old tradition that only he followed, the couple had to stay chaste for 3 nights.
>>131949
Didn't Tom Aquinas also destroy an automaton his teacher Albertus Magnus had built when he went to visit him? Truly autistic.
I love him but Charles XII was most likely a literal autist.
>before he became king enjoyed ruining noble's fancy balls with a bunch of his lads
>spent years in Poland-Lithuania giving Russia a chance to create a modern army and take over the Baltic because he wanted to teach his cousin the King of Saxony and P-L a lesson
>when he was signing a peace treaty with the same cousin sends his most famous mistress to his camp. They meet once and that ended after Karl said hello and rode away
>he couldn't fall asleep unless his head was resting on one of his soldier's legs
>the week before his showdown with Russia at Poltava he got shot in the leg and rode around the frontlines for another three hours before collapsing into his tent, taking himself out of action and dooming the Swedish Empire
>>1319547
I know jack shit about roman emperors, but what would happen if Claudius just refused to do anything?
>Tycho suddenly contracted a bladder or kidney ailment after attending a banquet in Prague.
>According to Kepler's first hand account, Tycho had refused to leave the banquet to relieve himself because it would have been a breach of etiquette
>After he had returned home he was no longer able to urinate, except eventually in very small quantities and with excruciating pain, and died eleven days later at the age of 54.
Could have lasted another decade contributing to science if he could just fucking apologize and go to the toilet for a minute
>>1319498
>He's autistic because he was deep in thought
>>1319632
He was autistic because he didn't want to fuck right away
That's called a different moral system/paradigm. Nowadays we simply have a paradigm where EVERYONE needs to be pigeonholed into some mental disorder. Hence why the Madonna-whore "complex" is called a complex rather than a moral code or sexual preference.
There's also the story of how his classmates at the University of Paris told him to come to the window because there were flying pigs outside, so he ran to the window going "flying pigs? where?" while his classmates laughed at him. When asked how he could be so naive he said he found it easier to believe in flying pigs than that his friends would lie to him.
>>1319740
Clau-Clau-Claudius never wanted to not be Emperor, he just hid behind the curtain because he thought when the Guards had finished with Caligula he'd be next. Dude had a long list of grievances he wanted to sort out and provided himself more than eager to swap his history books for the purple.
>>1319767
>When asked how he could be so naive he said he found it easier to believe in flying pigs than that his friends would lie to him.
Trollope, professional to his fingertips, often kept a calendar for the composition of his fiction. Before starting The Way We Live Now he made the following, slightly chilly, calculation: "Carbury novel. 20 numbers. 64 pages each number. 260 words each page. 40 pages a week. To be completed in 32 weeks."
But he was wrong. The "Carbury novel", begun in May 1873, took just 29 weeks, and ran to about 425,000 words. Incredibly, Trollope also polished off another work of fiction (Harry Heathcote of Gangoil) simultaneously.
>>1319767
I would've felt like shit if I was his friend. But probably he had no friend there and they were just bullying him.
>>1319498
Aquinas was also morbidly obese. Which makes it even funnier that one of his miracles was levitation.
>William of Malmesbury's humorous anecdote illustrates both the character of Eriugena and the position he occupied at the French court. King Charles having asked, "Quid distat inter sottum et Scottum?" (what separates a sot (drunkard) from an Irishman?) Eriugena replied, "Tabula tantum." (Only a table).
>>1319813
>Aquinas was also morbidly obese
No, he was a bit pudgy, but mostly just tall and broad shouldered. Morbid Obesity was hardly even possible for a Medieval person, let alone someone who who literally worked for an order that required you to be a beggar and only live off of donations.
>>1319938
>No one claimed Thomas Aquinas got famous on his looks. He was colossally fat, suffered from edema (dropsy), and one huge eye dwarfed his other.
>when he did speak, it was often completely unrelated to the conversation. His classmates in college called him "the dumb ox."
>>1319735
>couldn't fall asleep unless his head was resting on one of his soldiers legs
Jesus that's hilarious, source?
>>1319968
What is your source on that quote ?
>>1319498
While a young novice, his family had purchased him a prostitute, presumably so he could lighten the fuck up. But autist supreme decided to chase her out of the room with a firebrand rather than risk getting his dick wet.
>>1319756
This.
I wouldn't really call Louix IX autistic.
>>1322071
>Hey anon, look! We bought you a whore, now you can finally lose your virginity, you loser! Hahahaha!
>Sup
>H-hi. Y-you want to s-see my t-theological works?
>Say what
>I-it's like this, imagine that water is potential ice and...
>Look pal you wanna fuck or not?
>as his normie knight brothers laugh outside the room, autistic fury builds up in St. Anon, who chases them all away with a firebrand
>St. Anon is forever honored as a paragon of purity and celibacy
Those times were much better for our kind
>>1322071
Yeah, what happened was that Aquinas was supposed to be a wealthy landowner, his family wanted him to get into the church so he could own church lands and use it help make the family rich. Aquinas instead joined the Dominicans, who demanded its members have no property and live off of begging. They were also reformers against what they saw as creeping decadence in the church. Dominicans didn't get rich, and were considered to be very countercultural at the time. They locked him up in their castle to try to force him to cut that shit out. The whole point with the prostitute was to get him to break his vows of chastity so that he couldn't be a Dominican anymore. It failed and eventually he either escaped or they let him go after finally giving up.
"Autism, cuck, faggot, nigger"
Do I fit in yet?
>>1322190
you forgot "kike"
>>1322073
>implying they were actually his friends
>>1319938
>Morbid Obesity was hardly even possible for a Medieval person, let alone someone who who literally worked for an order that required you to be a beggar and only live off of donations.
You're very mistaken... Obesity was quite common, especially among clergy. This has been very much shown by bone findings, with those skeletal remains found in graves corresponding to clergy showed signs of obesity; beyond that, literary sources (especially secular literature such as the Decameron and others) point at how prevalent jokes were about the number of obese clergy and the supposed messages of restraint and asceticism that the Church thought.
http://www.thefinertimes.com/Middle-Ages/food-in-the-middle-ages.html
The above source is just so you can get started.
This guy was probably an autist
>invented a piece of silverware to let him cut his meal with his one good arm
>hated his mom for his birth defect
>Daily Telegraph affair
>cut down thousands of trees while in exile (again, with one good arm)
>>1322273
I don't deny that some people got overweight. Morbid obesity was extremely rare though ( as it was in almost every time period around the world). Aquinas was not fat like allot of modern Americans are.The dude had to walk everywhere begging for sustenance, as was the rules of his order, meaning that at some point he walked all the way from Naples to Paris. A fat guy could pull that off, but I really doubt that a morbidly obese person could.
>>1322391
how is that autistic
>>1319918
He was also allegedly stabbed to death by his students because he "made [them] think"
>>1319498
>Can we have a thread sharing moments of astounding autism by historical figures?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Plowshare
>>1322495
wow...
>>1322391
>>1322109
>normie
Stupid frogposter.
>>1322734
>talking about delicate matters of state and asking bold questions concerning foreign affairs at a fucking birthday party
KC pro right here.
>>1322734
>Willy calls Leo a cuck
>Leo wow just wows out of there
The absolute mememen
Still no mention of pic related in a thread about historical autists. Im proud of you, /his/.
>>1320961
1/3 of Robert Massie's Peter the Great is focused on Karl and the Great Northern War. I highly recommend it.
>>1322453
>The dude had to walk everywhere begging for sustenance,
Didnt the receive tons of donations from the Aristocracy and reserve the active alms seeking to newer brothers?
>>1324378
Only when stationed in a University was Aquinas not living a strict wandering Dominican lifestyle. Even still, he was living in what was essentially a shoddy apartment with a bunch of other dudes, and officially owned nothing, eating based on what people donated to them. Maybe during those times he got fat when the donations were good ( the Dominicans were considered radical reformers, not exactly the stuff most aristocrats would be attracted to. Though at least one pope loved them so that would have helped). But he had several appointments all across Western Europe and back: Paris, Cologne, Naples, Rome , and he was required to walk all of them. I find it hard to believe that a morbidly obese man would be capable of doing that.
>>1323297
Martin "Gas the Kikes" Luther
>>1324394
Dude, he was FAMOUSLY fat. You don't become famous for obesity by being a little portly. He had to have a semicircle cut into his desk to accommodate his massive gut.
>>1324394
>Even still, he was living in what was essentially a shoddy apartment with a bunch of other dudes
Suspicious.
>>1322734
Holy shit I'm dying
>>1325512
Could have been a result of his edema.
>>1322071
He didn't want to become a filthy fucking normie
>>1325512
>Dude, he was FAMOUSLY fat.
>People never exaggerate or make up stories
Constantine on the Aquinas defense force on this thread.
>>1327483
>this coming from a Christian
>>1319756
>That's called a different moral system/paradigm. Nowadays we simply have a paradigm where EVERYONE needs to be pigeonholed into some mental disorder.
Agreed-
>Hence why the Madonna-whore "complex" is called a complex rather than a moral code or sexual preference.
...And disagreed. Firstly, you clearly don't know what the Madonna-whore complex is about, and secondly you need to accept our modern paradigm and moral code in which moral questions has no place in consensual sex between adults. And it's not a sexual preference, it's the feelings of your own experienced inadequacy fetishized into liking "innocent" women. You need to deal with yourself, not deal with any kind of lacking or morality in society which you experience.
