/build/ 2016
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Live stream is about to start.
https://build.microsoft.com/
is there a list of keynotes yet
>>53768657
on channel9
>>53768674
thanks.
>>53768674
bost link bls
>>53768593
Piss off you fucking idiot.
>>53768790
https://channel9.msdn.com/Events/Build/2016?direction=asc#tab_sortBy_day
https://channel9.msdn.com/LiveEmbedPlayer/Build2016?rnd=1459350962997
>>53768803
why
>>53768827
Ignore 12 year old Arch users.
>>53768809
Thanks, m8
Totally forgot about /build/. Are there any rumors/expectations this time around?
>>53768803
pic related
How come all tech business presentations have to be cringeworthy and generally shit?
>>53768882
Ubuntu userland running in windows.
I THINK IT'S HAPPENING IN A FEW MINUTES
>>53768882
bash/ or ubuntu being built into windows, and interactive live tiles
>>53768882
Satya Nadella showing off how much he hates Windows
N A D E L L A S A M A
shittysound.mp3
Fuck off M$ shills.
Loo Steve Jobs
>>53768882
edge extensions
some new w10 features the employees were hyping on twiter
continuing the raping of windows mobile
>>53768921
no :)
>>53768862
>12 year old Arch users?
What? Where did that come from?
I liked the past /build/, I hope it's the same this year
captcha: raising AI
>>53768904
>bash/ or ubuntu being built into windows
Oh God please
They have the guts of talking about privacy...
>>53768934
Please Pajeet.
I hope someone makes a video of all the times he says technlogy
"we love our users, also those with 5 years old PCs."
DEVELOPERS
DEVELOPERS
DEVELOPERS
Ugh can we fast forward to the announcements? Marketing is so boring.
Waking up today to delicious Nadella.
Not a bad way to start the day.
And you, /g/, are you born mobile™?
"tomorrow you'll hear about azure"
does that mean no cloud bullshit today? would be great.
Holy Cow Poop, Nadella is a terrible speaker. I had to mute the audio because he sounds so terrible. Hope the next person comes on soon.
Ok Pajeet enough marketing and corporate buzzwords. Show us the new features
FUCK IS THIS BORING
finally he's gone
5Bn times people accidentally clicked on the windows store while trying to use their frustrating OS
>>53768998
Not a chance.
>Cloud today, Cloud tomorrow, CLOUD FOREVER!
I don't know why Microsoft has such a boner for cloud services when internet access in the US is so shitty. I live a block away from one of Level 3's major backbones but because the city only lets Comcast provide residential service, I'm stuck with a low quality connection that randomly goes out for no reason they can explain. Why would I let my entire computer usage go to shit each time some Comcast monkey shits on a router? If cloud is to be successful, the tech companies are going to have to get rid of the geographic monopolies ISPs have. Google Fiber is a good start but is rolling out at a crawl.
>move away from Mechanical keyboards
he forgot the text. god.
SPAGHETTI
>5 year old pc
>feedbock
Hi Mary Jo.
Hi Paul.
Anyone thing those two have ever knocked boots while drunk?
give feedbock
stream froze and won't restart
help
>On behalf of the entire Windows team, we're happy to welcome all of these customers to Windows 10.
>Whether they have a new PC, a 5-year-old PC, or a brand new Mac.
>>53769117
>Leo sits in the corner filming
Web sites with biometric authentication? Interesting though I can think of several exploits already.
watching this on my chromebox
oh no....
is this guy for real
Oh no, the neckbeard...
ey man u want some updaet
>>53769105
>tfw rocking a 5 and a half year old hp with windows 7
Thank you microsoft
>>53768593
It's Fedora man again
>>53769122
I'm using https://stream.microsoft.com/events/2016/1603/Build/player/Build.html?title=Build-ch9&metricsc9=true
>tipping fedora intensifies
>>53769150
came here to write this
I love this Fedora guy, he should run MS instead of Nutella
Holy fuck. This guy is every fedora meme ever!
m'fatrolls
Euphoric.
>>53769136
>transmitting biometric data over the internet
Oh yeah. Several.
why does build use slashes when most of the shit in windows is backslashes?
this is like apple having a keynote and referencing ".exe"
Whitest pimp I've ever seen
What a crock of crap this is.
>>53769170
kek
>>53769170
>>53769172
new meme is borning
>>53769161
A white male in charge of anything tech related? That's not politically correct anymore. Come on, it's 2016!
>>53769170
>>53769162
>>53769161
he's a quite interesting guy. hated him the first time but now i like him.
https://news.microsoft.com/stories/people/bryan-roper.html
>>53769187
He perform better in the Device event
>>53769170
>>53769172
is this guy fucking real? is he actually wearing a fedora on a stage at a tech talk?
>>53769161
>>53769159
>>53769156
It's a Trilby.
Microsoft just invented Notepad with in app purchases
is anyone there browsing this thread?
>she mixes up english with latin
>latin
>muh mom
>homie
>fedora
This fucking guy
?my homie who rocks at reminders, cortana
jesus
>fedora
>loves his mom
If he mentions tendies this will be the greatest build ever
XAML was a mistake
How many times is he going to say "make some noise"? Jesus.
BRAND ALERT
Please use the term temporary semiadhesive paper instead
>>53769201
Look everyone, we got a black woman in the crowd! Look at her!!!!
god. i do not give a shit about sticky notes and pens. also cortana. no
why wont they quit with the cortana shit.
"Anniversary Update" release this summer
>>53769201
oh that changes things.
If a need to take a note im not gonna pick up my tablet, unlock it with my fingerprint then open the notes app
im still gonna use paper
>>53769213
His mother is the pope.
>AWW Y'ALL LIKE IT
ipad pro has no rulers
>>53769170
this guy just telling don't use pen and paper use pad and their pen -_-'
>72%
>acute origin angle
microsoft plzzzz
WOW A RULER!!!
>>53769225
did you accidentally reply to that post or are you trying to ride on the coattail of a more interesting post than your own?
either way, please shut the fuck up because nobody is interested in rabble rousing. if your autism gets triggered because a woman tweeted something, go into a small closet, wrap a plastic bag around your head, and die.
>Y'ALL
>Y'ALL
>Y'ALL
>Y'ALL
>Y'ALL
>Y'ALL
Power of the pc homie
>>53769219
Blasphemy!
It's not perfect but damn, it's nicer that the shitshow that is HTML and CSS.
i'm literally watching a guy try to argue that tablets are better than paper for writing things on. *draws two lines with a ruler, both lines fail to connect and look like shit*
This nigga is shaking so bad lmfao
>implying this guy could climb a mountain
the power of 6 frames per second
>>53769257
Y'all can't handle people with light accents and regional colloquialisms?
Y'all must go nuts when y'all travel any significant distance.
>let's have lunch at a mountain
what
THAT'S THE POWER OF THE PEN AND THE PC COMING TOGETHER
HALLELUJAH
so this is.....
the power of the pen
A mexican using shit hardware for a bunch of asians
this is actually pretty cool desu but im not gonna spend over a thousand bongbucks in order to use it
>>53769242
I eliminated paper from my life last year. But I use whiteboards as caches for things I want to jot down quickly. If Microsoft is serious about this, they need to stop with the "Updating Windows, fuck you!" nonsense when I turn on a device to do something quickly. Five minutes of waiting for a pushed update to install when I just wanted to add something to a grocery list isn't a very good use case.
>>53769272
yeah. i think he's extremely nervous. He is about to faint
>>53769272
webm/gif?
>>53769308
They have fixed this in my experience, unless you're taking notes at 3AM.
lmao he has a fucking fedora
>>53769290
People sometimes go outside.
struggling to draw on a finicky tablet when you could just draw freely on paper, scan it to a computer and convert it to a vector.
>>53769256
Someone has the sad. Must be terrible to go through life watching other succeed while losing your last excuses for failure.
>cortana shut down my PC
WTF?
So is Windows ink just for Surface Pros or will I be able to use it with a Wacom digitizer/pen as well?
>cortana
not that i will use cortana but cortana is only working couple of countries and yet they are proud of it.
CANT STREAM FOR SHIT, what's happening?
"Open ecosystem"
>>53768593
I hope they release option to sideloading w10m apps like android
>>53769335
yeah this guy can walk 2.1 miles up a mountain and not have a heart attack
>>53769340
yeah, it doesn't work for me
soon (tm)
>>53769352
Pens.
Get a on the liveblog
https://live.theverge.com/microsoft-build-2016-live-blog/
that old white guy was excited
yeah yeah cool
>proud of apps that are just websites
this shit is what almost killed the iOS app ecosystem. People don't want an app for every single website they use.
>>53769328
I do. But it also happens when starting a device that I have shutdown or the battery drained down.
>>53769359
it's build. nothing is implemented right now. this stuff is about Redstone.
I just remmber people were able to scream loud enough through Xbox Live to give commands to Kinect.
>>53768593
Is this the build they remove all the spyware?.
>>53769358
nigga I don't care about what Fedora can personally do.
Is there some rule at Microsoft that only the CEO is allowed to tuck in his shirt?
>>53769365
The Verge is sucky linkbait.
As a pilot i can say that, it's not a new thing. anyone with a android tablet or ipad can look their charts. but it is about company. Not all companies use electronic tablets.
what is the minimum required weight to have an american citizenship?
>>53769365
Thx anon
>>53769394
Then google liveblog dude, I dont give a shit.
>still can't rename cornata
> Literally bragging about having animations similar to iOS
I know this is just an example but damn it looks like shit.
>>53769412
Like everything else that we saw so far.
Did they mention anything about the hell that is Win32 API?
>ruler
why are all the people presenting for MS super fat?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GgutlKV42SY
>>53769432
they're americans in the tech industry
>>53769432
MS doesn't give them bouncy chairs or standing desks like google
Bash in Windows
Linux is dead
GNU
wb zsh?
bash nigga bash
>Bash
Happening
RIP Linux
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
>Linux on Windows
>Bash
This is actually good
>>53769441
But Apple doesn't seem to have such fat fatties as this.
BASH FOR WINDOWS
LINUX IS OVER
IT'S FINISHED
why is win + lin such a big thing ?
LINUX ON SASUGA WATCH
Linux on suicide watch
>amina
is it that fucking hard to say "i'm gonna"?
did they think this through?
wow I can be a screenfetch anime whore on Windows now!
>>53769472
They used to try and do things but Ballmer absolutely hated anything Linux so would put his foot down to stop it
>vim+tmux on Windows 10
MY FUCKING DICK
Emacs on Windows. I'v never gonna believe
>>53769493
I see, but for the end user ?
bash would make me upgrade to 10 on my 7 computer. when do they add it?
bruh rms is spinning in his grave
>>53769497
Year of the linux desktop ;')
CMD IS DEAD
>Asks how they feel about Linux tools in Windows.
>Row of frowning MS faithful with crossed arms in the shot of the crowd.
>>53769505
It's all about DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS DEVELOPERS
As long as they keep developing for windows, the users will stay
Not impressed
>>53769505
makes it easier instead of having to install 3rd party software or dual booting
LITERALLY NO REASON TO USE LINUX ANYMORE.
>>53769513
that´s probably Windows Redstone, so rather soonish.
Did anyone catch that linuck baby?
THE YEAR OF LINUX
ON WINDOWS
I'm annoyed and impressed at the fucking place they have this.
>decent sound
>proper stage and visuals
>nice big open space with comfortable seeting
meanwhile at the best of foss FOSDEM:
>cramped as fuck dark rooms with no windows
>cheap plastic secondary school chairs from 2004
>shitty audio
>1998 projector
>SAGE
>>53769505
end user being people that double click .exe files?
nothing. but if you're interested in doing any software development, the absence of bash made windows a joke.
YEAR OF THE LINUX DESKTOP
Linux never again.
>>53769556
kek
>>53769551
>>53769529
>>53769526
Ok, i'm no dev., but why is it so important for developers then ?
Now that WIndows does everything that Linux does and even more, is it time to change the meme from "install gentoo" to "install windows" ?
>>53769551
what if you're one of those end users that presses enter on .exe files?
>>53769587
Kill yourself.
>>53769583
Windows is still disrespectful of users' privacy, so no.
>Not responding
>tfw Windows still doesnt have proper DPI scaling
pls MS
>>53769568
i don't know how to explain it for you any more than >>53769551 if you don't know anything development-related. it'd just be jargon to you.
>>53768593
XAML + C# framework = muh universal apps
ABSOLUTELY DISGUTING
MAKE AN UWP MY MAN
>>53769587
>end user being people that double click .exe files?
>nothing.
you need to try reading.
>embrace
>embrace
>embrace
>>53769497
But I already had that since 2 years ago.
And with a much better terminal
>>53769614
>ABSOLUTELY DISGUTING
Why?
I've written a Xamarin-based cross platform app and it worked really well.
This is the first time in a long time I've heard them refer to CMD as Dos Shell. They had dropped calling it DOS shell around XP
>>53769609
try me pls, i'm really interested. just the general idea, not everything in detail
broken window
PHIL SPENCER
HOLOLENS AND GAMING
YEAR OF THE LINUX DESKTOP
>>53769469
More authentic
>>53769627
Its not real programming, and Microsoft will abandon the XML/XAML/.CMO/Windows Store bullshit in a few years and your skills will be USELESS.
>>53769644
Oh, I didn't realize you were trolling at first.
Carry on.
>games @ //b/
MEDIOCRE
god it's so painful to hear the smattering of applause. it's like only 10 people are bothering to clap even when the presenter pauses for it.
>tfw watching a MS presentation from a Linux distro
>tfw I'm not even using WIndows
how do I skip the gmaing part
PHILL SPENCER
NO PLS
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
SPARE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>53769665
if you can't figure out how to skip a section of a video (or that you can't skip the live feed) then the answer is "you don't. just sit there and take whatever comes down your throat."
>>53769485
/b/ isn't your secret club anon and no one gives a fuck.
>WINBLOWS 10 BOTNET
NOT EVEN ONCE
>>53769656
You petulant child, have fun learning your meme frameworks and let me know unemployment works out you.
who /v/ here
>>53769689
oh wow, are you honestly retarded?
>>53769700
MUH BROTHER
Just downloaded KI overnight, will try it when I get home from my job.
>disable vsync
Holy fucking shit.
how the fuck is he walking around
>>53769713
i think he got legs anon
Microsoft wants that Steam audience
>Microsoft took Age of Empires II HD from Steam and converted it into a modern desktop app.
ITS OVER, STEAM IS FINISHED
How do I watch the live stream on Android?
anyone can post a direct link to the stream?
Is this basically a steam game in a metro wrapper now?
>>53769713
Windows enthusiasts, everyone.
which build are they using?
>>53769732
Don't you still need steam though?
>>53769738
No, they need the source to convert them, because a windows metro app need to run on ARM devices too.
You're looking at native code running.
>>53769727
so redditards and anime erp faggots from /v/?
>>53769738
Looks like it.
I think the idea is that it almost runs in a virtual monitor of its own at full performance.
Not certain as the point they're making.
>>53769745
2016
>Windows is and continues to be a fully open ecosystem.
>fully open
fuck, i hope cd projekt will not suck ms cock
omg a grill talking
>>53769766
this guy is a cock sucking faggot with a lisp
>token woman with "look guys i'm a gaymer just like you" t-shirt
>>53769766
top kek
>Remote debugging on xbone
That's...actually really cool.
how old is she?
>>53769782
He's a poser. Bet a market person dressed him for the event.
>>53769783
"just werks"
JUST
WERKS
>the controller
>it just werks
I'm laughing at you faggots
>>53769800
JUST
WORSE
>>53769783
wasn't phil spencer wearing some gamer shirt?
isn't 99% of this part of the stream just the screencapture?
are you being a hypersensitive faggot?
do you adopt the hyper-sensitive woman role if the woman in the conversation is giving a demo and not being all preachy and emotional about it?
OMG OMG ADDING SPEECH BUBBLES TO PHOTOS WAS NEVER SO SIMPLE
>>53769799
Yeah, her voice is kind of annoying but she might be MILFy. Not sure since she was on screen for such a short time.
it just works
>>53769769
too late
>just works
>>53769813
shut the fuck up faggot, shes a fucking piece of shit
>>53769766
Im not a developer, but even I can see through that shit.
>>53769766
open ecosystem. Not open code
>>53769823
lol okay autism. she was literally on screen for all of 5 seconds and you had a panic attack about the t-shirt she had under a jacket.
Does anyone stream has artifacting and lag?
>>53769603
>have a PC
>can't do anything useful
>"well, at least I got my privacy"
Why don't you just unplug your internet? Same difference.
UBUNTU WON
UNIFIED STORE
WINDOWS WON
>>53769832
Yes shit is like Quantum Break gameplay right now
pls
IT'S OVER MICROSOFT WON
#Linuxcucks on suicide watch
>>53769832
I had and got scared as fuck because Diablo 3 was updating in the background
>>53769832
Yes. I hope the stream dies.
>>53769837
Ubuntu got assimilated.
>>53769832
yep
>>53768593
DirectX 12
"Fastest Adoption, marketing bullshit"
Literally only 3 games use DX12 as of this moment.
How can anyone hate Phil Spencer?
>>53769832
Glad it's not a problem on my end
the jew is back again
Ho Lee Fuk this guy is sparkly
GET THIS HIPSTER OUT
the subset libraries and integration is gonna be a really fucking mess to make all this shit work in some coherent manner, not counting their goal to inter-operate with consoles and windows phones. all these little gimmicks will consume a lot of resources and they will be hardly ever used.
at the same time there are now two control panels on windows 10
Remember when they told us last year that every windows 8 phone would get win10?
10 rupees has deposited to your account pajeet
Thank you hungry skeleton
Hologram cringe guy again.
how do they still have this guy speaking, he is such a joke
>hey did you guys know you can play some xbox games on PC?????
fucks sake I know they really want to push this but we know absolutely nothing about the games they are releasing this year besides Quantum Break
This guy's NOSE
Hololens still expensive as fuck
>>53769826
yeah we know what that means, but anyone can see that isn't where its going.
>WIN10 EXCLUSIVE
Alex is trying to be Joe.
and he literally only speaks in buzzwords and gimmick terms
Microsoft has a huge hard on for developers.
I LOVE U MAN
Gayyyyyy
what was that
GAY
wtf
GAY
A
Y
>>53769902
oh noes! hololens will not work with gentoo!
Are they pandering to fujos now?
Holy shit Microsoft is full of weirdos
I LOVE YOU MAN
He stopped acting to work for MS?
The saddest part about Microsoft events is the people doing the presentations are just fucking lifeless, automatically reading the teleprompters, just no fucking spirit to any of 'em
They really should take some lessons from Apple in that respect.
But then again Microsoft events just don't really matter anyway I suppose.
Geez, just so boring.
Oh god, that hug just now... what the fuck man, I mean really.
"I love you man..."
SERIOUSLY?!?!?!
>THAT HUG
TOP FUCKING KEK
CRINGE
>>53769760
top kek
>>53769745
probably one of the 103xx branch
what a bunch of homos
>i luv you man
>i luv you too
ahahahahah hug? love you man?
CRINGE
Was that hug really necessary
Hololens avaliable for developers
porn when?
PORN WHEN
>token homosexuals to fit in with the liberal "hip" crowd
i luv u /g/
FAGGOTS
>"I love you man"
>MUH LGBT ACCEPTANCE
My soul is vomiting.
If this was a real couple people would go "go get a room". See how everyone will respond now. "Y-you homophobic scum!"
Watch it happen and laugh.
>>53769906
What ever happened to the only decent speaker Microsoft has?
>>53769931
KEK HUB
DYED HAIR IN AD
I LOVE YOU MAN
GET THESE GAY FAGS OUT
>>53769888
I'm actually happy 10 isn't going to be pushed on my 520. It's so low end it would probably shit itself.
>>53769945
what did he whisper in his ear?
Where is the word bubble grill to tell us
GITHUB
>you will never have a friendship as close as those two
Why go on?
>>53769959
>I love you, man.
https://github.com/Microsoft/GalaxyExplorer
>>53769941
Never if they don't fix their shit FOV.
>>53769945
>/g/-chan daisuki
This faggot speak like he literally memorized an entire buzzwords dictionary.
>>53769980
That's because he's reading it from screens.
>>53769930
I've been to a few Microsoft events where they tried to copy Apple's presentation style. They were cringy. Microsoft is better off just admitting they're the suburban dad of tech companies.
is that Merkel?
>>53769978
Fatty chaser detected.
>>53769997
They just showed plans for a hospital, not an immigrant home, so no.
>>53769997
>this fat bitch
"The most forward thinking forward possible"
so progressive it hurts
>>53769997
So they're gonna holoport the refugees
>Every Apple event gets a sticky
>Not a single MS event ever has
Sasuga mods
>no penis
>>53769997
her lesbo-middle-east cousin
>>53769988
This image from the liveblog confirms your point.
>>53770007
Kek.
cringe
NERDS!
they're so fucking cardboard holy shit
OMGYOU CAN VIEW A 3D MODEL IN HOLOLENS
bane?
MODS
STICK THIS NAAO!
>>53770010
IF YOU BUY A HOLOLENS YOU HAVE NO PENIS OR BALLS. YOU HEARD IT FIRST HERE
>>53770017
>misaka wa
That looks fake as fuck
>this feels really natural
well its looks spooky as fuck
Is this a Tim & Eric skit?
>guy on left moves out of the way - physically - as the guy from some other location's hologram walked towards him
I mean really.
>>53770032
kek
This is fucking nuts!
THIS IS REALLY NATURAL
Holy shit they are so lifeless. At least the last Apple event had some banter, and the presentators really knew how to attract an audience. This entire MS event sounds like a child reading from a book in middle school.
>>53770032
THIS IS REALLY NATURAL
>>53770024
that's how future looks like
is that dud eon th eleft michael cerna
>>53770059
Have you watched the Device event last year?
we /sanic/ now
Upgrade to Windows 10 now or else
they really chose famillar symptoms
That orange head flying around is creepy as fuck
>>53770059
>Applefags need to shit up ms events
>Meanwhile no one care at apple events and its just shitposting
wew lad
ms please. if we can afford it we will not use it for lessons. we will use it for porn
That's really fucking cool, but goddamn these people are cringey.
WINDOWS MOBILE NOW PLS ENOUGH BULLSHIT AND SQUEAKY VOICES
sorry for shouting
>>53770059
they've always been extremely cringe and dorky. Ballmer was the only high energy presenter they had.
The fuck am I watching
SMOOOOOCH
>>53769626
>vm
>dat hand rubbing
>>53770059
>Apple
>serious dev event
Pick one.
as shitty as the presentation is you gotta admit, that shits pretty friggen cool.
>"Thankyousomuch. Wow."
Ayyyyyyyyyyyyy
>>53770100
Dumb anime poster
they turned buzz aldrin into a hologram
rest in peace
>>53770111
"lets go to mars.whoooooooosh"
>>53769170
THEY KNOW
>>53770130
kek
>>53770108
Yeah.
God damn, MS has plenty of money.
They should really invest in some presenters, or at least more training for these guys.
We ayylien now
why cant they tal kabout the actual OS more. I don't care abou tpens NASA and virtual reality stuff
MICROSOFT WILL MAKE ANIME REAL
you. the developers. the. developers. you.
ayyyyy
http://strawpoll.me/7228866
>>53770108
Indeed!!
And Buzz
>hololens starts shipping today
Bring the waifus boys!
>>53770126
FUCKING NORMIES
>>53770147
Dumb anime poster
>>53770137
It's a developer event not normie friendly like the device event.
>>53770152
cringe/10
>>53770147
oh shit I didnt even fucking realise...
WE WILL ACHIEVE THE IMPOSSIBLE /G/ENTOOMEN
>>53770157
Dumb anime poster
>>53770096
They know that. Bing being the Official Search Engine for Porn shows they know what drives tech adoption but they can't say it publicly. Did you see the shit they got last week because there were women in school girl outfits at one of their after parties?
B-BUT WHERE'S WINDOWS PHONE
>>53770137
Someone forgot to teach you that skills are useless at the top of the hierarchy. It's all about pandering to the socially acceptable denominator. LGBT/Feminazis and all equality bullshit.
That's why they throw you every incapable mongoloid on stage that cannot even read scrolling text from a screen. It's ok, he's gay/progressive/fedoralord, people will forgive him.
>>53770195
Replaced by UWP for Android :^)
Mod is a cunt. This should have been stickied.
>>53770147
I wonder which would be better:
>anime in VR like the Vive
>anime superimposed in your environment with AR
>>53770147
>now I can sit by my waifu side
>>53770142
It's the keynote. The technical details are presented in the breakout sessions over the next couple of days. You can find all the videos on Channel 9 as they're posted.
>>53770199
THE MASKETTA MAN
>>53770199
To be fair he was born in the richest part of India.
>>53770195
UWP
>>53770215
>>53770178
>>53770217
But anon, you're unemployed.
>>53770214
/v/irgin here. Build 2016 thread there has been deleted even though there's vidya in this conference.
>>53770220
ah okay. thanks
>>53770225
Defecate in the bio-waste removal facility?
>>53770229
Don't worry, It'll be cheap soon.
>all these buzzwords
>>53770229
I'm watching this at the office right now, Mr. Projector.
Reminder that apple events are always stickied right from the start.
Cmon Nutella, address 4chan
Did I miss any C# or .net talks?
what the fuck is he talking about. we dont need no philosophy shit talking man, get to the point
>>53770226
>Those Apple tier charts
MS not even trying anymore
sticky this, great lard-ass that does it for free
>>53770268
He just did.
>>53770268
god this guy is putting me to sleep with his flowery bullshit
why is this not sticky yet?
TAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY
>>53770059
it's fucking Build.
Watch Device Event from the last year if you want something Apple-like.
tay is dead
>>53770268
he actually did, no way
>>53770266
Janitors confirmed as apple fags
#JUSTICEFORTAY
>>53770280
Applecuck mods have never stickyd a Microsoft event before and they are not going to start now
>>53770274
It's the first day of the conference. This is the only event so far. But there will be plenty of those talks over the next few days.
I wish I had the skill of speaking for so long while actually saying nothing.
TECHNOLOGY NEEDS TO BE INCLUSIVE
FOR THE BEST, NOT THE WORST OF HUMANITY
>Don't TAY's me man!!!
>>53770311
shakatanai
Guys I just realized, with hololens Japan will have subtitles for the weebs!!
>>53770313
Cheers senpai
>>53770274
Just a bit of a highlight on remote debugging for Xbox One and deploying Win32 to the Windows Store (about fucking time).
>>53770152
7 I like what they show, I don't like how they do it.
SMARTER EVERY DAY
IT KNOWS ABOUT YOU AND THE WORLD
>facebook will bring you to your waifu
>microsoft will bring your waifu to you
feels good :)
GUYS - RATE PLS
http://strawpoll.me/7228866
>>53770333
Did they say anything about Win forms conversion? Or does the application have to be XAML?
>>53770320
Thought crimes!
>>53770324
Holy fuck, how cool would it be to walk around in a foreign country and have little subtitles located around each person that speaks?
>>53770358
10 rupees has been deposited into your M$ account
>>53770358
3 for freedom
>>53770358
>(Pick one)
asked for it
>>53770358
I did >>53770168
kek nobody noticed they gonna release Windows Anniversary Update the same time Windows stops being free
well ok. Linux now is on Windows. So can we foreget about BSOD or what?
reminder that Cortana is still just a gimmick
>>53770361
Univeral Apps for deployement to iOS, Android, and XBone will be XAML.
You'll be able to deploy WinForms to the Windows Store though for desktop platforms only, I suppose.
>>53770364
Exactly man! That would be great!
>>53770361
I doubt there will ever be a direct WinForm to XAML converter.
>>53768593
Tfw when you want Marcus Ash to choke you with his cock
>>53770377
Update is June, It's free until the end of July. I bet they extend it tho.
i can't believe windows phone is fucking DEAD
Boo noone cares about shitty Cortana shitty jokes
fuck this is cringeworthy
You guys with me?
oh dear...
Always with the jokes.
>batman joke
oh god, the cringe is real
hey cortana stfu
Shit that was so cringy. Wanted to kill myself.
>nanan nan, a-aare you guy with m-me... alright :(
I almost died of cringe
MS events should be banned by geneva convention
>only one person clapped
>No one laughs
I thought they had these keynotes rehearsed?
SODIUM SODIUM SODIUM SODIUM SODIUM SODIUM SODIUM SODIUM SODIUM SODIUM SODIUM SODIUM SODIUM SODIUM
U GET ME?
CLAP CLAP CLAP
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH MAKE IT STOP
Developers slept through chemistry class.
>cortana looks at email
>"Bots are the new applications, and digital assistants are meta apps or like the new browsers."
and here i was thinking microsoft made operating systems and tools to help people get shit done.
what is that hamburger icon?
>>53770378
Worse, we will have a Kernel Panic on top a BSOD.
p-please clap
The fuck happened to the tilebar of this application
BOTNET CONFIRMED
>All these personal assistant AIs from MS, google, apple
>Meanwhile in Belgium
>"Ok google how do i get to Kortrijk"
>"Here's how to get to Cartwright"
pushbullet deprecated
>>53770433
ah,, nice
>>53770433
And now I realise Cortana is smarter than me.
>>53770454
universal outlook app?
>>53770456
Oh I know what you mean, insha'allah
>>53770479
You do realise the developers manually added/it pulls from a feed?
>>53770439
but FROM MY PERMISSION.
at least they're learning to sidestep these PR landmines
THINKPADDDDDD
>cortana found out i took a taxi last night because it scanned my mails
BOTNET
Anyone notice the old IE click sound?
>my android phone
>android phone
>not windows phone
AHAHAHAHAHA
>>53770504
they said it's not a real demo
Daddy better deliver. Marcus Ash confirmed for sexy daddy.
>>53770493
I do understand she didn't come up with it herself, but took it from somewhere, like with everything else.
>he uses an andoid phone
WINDOWS MOBILE CONFIRMED DEAD
>>53770504
Good to know I didn't hallucinate that.
Can Cortana Shitpost?
botnet
>>53770456
Yea,, same in Norway!
Also when will the surface book be available for us europoor?
>>53770456
It's an Anglo world
this cortana thing is actually scary. it knows every shit, saves every shit about you.
>>53770503
>your employer gives you a Windows Phone
>can't forge expences anymore because Cortana is onto your shit
I hope government bans this shit or at least my company IT dep will become paranoid
>>53770516
>>53770517
>>53770532
THEY WILL COME THROUGH
THEY WILL SHOW A NEW BUILD
WE HAVE CONTINUUM
WINDOWS PHONE IS THE FUTURE OF UWP
>>53770503
>microsoft actively making it harder for me to cheat on my bitch wife
>>53770537
If she is like Tay, then yes.
>we support android and ios applications
>windowsphone not mentioned
kek
>>53770553
Google has already been doing this for ages.
"We have developed the means to know everything about you. Past, present, and future."
>>53770569
IF cortana had Tay's personality I would actually use it.
https://dev.botframework.com/
>THOSE AMPLIFIED APPLAUSES
>>53770561
Ban it? Governments are wetting themselves at the thought of having access to every detail of your life.
>surveillance tools are now "conversation canvases"
KEK
Satya speaks English like my grandfather in South Africa
Drinking game: take a shot everytime someone says:
"rich"
"conversational"
"intelligent"
>inb4 microsoft bought discord
>>53770598
>https://dev.botframework.com/
alright that's pretty neat
jesus christ her voice is so obnoxious
SKYPE BOTNET CONFIRMED
waifu
>>53770571
ms actually care about softwares not hardwares.
Bill gates had seen that and instead of building a computer he had started microsoft. So it's very normal that they use android. They are simply saying we will be at everywhere.
>windows phone users
>>53770608
Russia wants all foreign OSs and use KGB Linux build. They already banned MS products from government organizations
Can Cortana mute the audio each time Nadella is on the stage?
>token woman with "Oh look at me i'm so much more fashionable than you shitlord neckbeards. Girl Power!" clothing apparel
milf
>Gurdeep
>Windows phone
gurdeep looks horrifying jesus
POO
>Thanks
What a callous bitch.
i'll gurdeep in her
>WINDOWS PHONE
WE DID IT REDDIT
RINCON
RINCON
RINCON
RINCON
RINCON
RINCON
LOO
>>53770681
THE
>>53770681
THE
CORTANA ALWAYS THERE HIGHLIGHTING IMPORTANT THINGS
WOMEN IN TECHNOLOGY
>>53770598
Hory shet, going to play with this right now.
Is she a feminazi?
>"promote women in technology"
ok I'm done
>>53770641
that would make sense, had they not built a entire phone platform to compete with apple and google.
I wonder what her most embarrassing sexual experience is
THE CUPCAKE IS ON ITS WAY, I REPEAT, THE CUPCAKE IS ON ITS WAY.
Fuckin feminazi REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Coitus?
>No WP announcements so far
Holy shit wait for it guys, it's coming. I know it's coming.
Beep boop
THAT NOISE
WHAT WAS IT FROM
>>53770728
IT'LL HAPPEN IT'LL HAPPEN
Does cortana work better if you say please and thank you? I always just give commands
Holy shit, cortana know too much now
wth is gurdeep?
lol,
>you should shitpost your friends now
like what even
>SHE KNOWS WHO I COMMUNICATE WITH
>SHE HAS CONTEXT
BOTNET
TITS OR GTFO UGLY SLUT
ok that was kinda cute
>>53770728
At least it got mentioned, 2 hours in.
>>53770709
they know that they did not succeed. But again they gained a little bit profit by buying nokia.
How do the text got replied instantly? Was her friend waiting for her?
>>53770728
Windows Phone is dead. Long live Surface Phone.
Oh my god the CRINGE
>he he he he
>really sad look
>CLAP CLAP CLAP
>pauses for applause
>no-one applauds
>nutella raises card saying "Applaud"
>hehe, thanks goys
>>53770751
Indian name, like Pajeet or Rajesh.
>>53770770
CRASHING THIS PLATFORM
BOTNETS EVERYWHERE
LITERALLY BOTNET LMAO
"Built a botnet for skype"
>android and ios apps
kek
>>53770777
Orbiters
>Skype bot
>bot
Not even trying to hide it anymore?
Why does skype make such cute sounds
THEY DIDN'T HAVE IT ON THE SLIDE
"p-please clap": the presentation
>L I T E R A L L Y BOTNET
>ubeat ukulele music with lots of clicking and whistling
cool !!
>skype convo with hololense
>they draw a large cock on the wall and upload scat and gore
th-thanks microsoft
>>53770807
She fucking demo it on a lumia
Microsoft is fucking done.
>CONVERSATIONAL CANVASES
aka botnets
what the fuck
>>53770824
Can we just kill all the milenials that like this shit?
STICKYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
BUILD BOT
BOT FRAMEWORK.
The botnet is real
>bot framework
hue
>still trying to shill Skype
ayyy
>>53770807
there you go
THE HOLO LENS WILL MAKE THE TOILETS LOOK LIKE STREETS SO WE CAN TRICK THE INDIANS
>>53770807
well, the current Skype client is a nightmare
I hope this one is better, it´s driving me nuts.
>build your own botnet
>>53770846
This is not unintentional.
Microsoft is actively mocking us "outcasts" out of society.
> tfw your gonna make a sextbot with their framework
Feels good man
>BOT FRAMEWORK
It's happening, RMS was right. Why you didn't listen?
>this guy
I'm actually pretty fucking hype about the bot framework.
I want to build a bot that searches my company's knowledge-base and spits out articles back to the technician.
Integrate it into Skype for Business and now these dumbasses won't be calling me at night with dumb fucking questions.
Hey Cortana, tell me a joke.
>MICROSOFT BOT FRAMEWORK
WINFAGS BTFO
>SO EXCHITEHED!!! TEH MICROSOFTH BOT FRAMEHAWORK
>Microsoft Bot Framework
ChanBot is here!
>>53770838
The hippies in the 60s grew up to be boring Dockers wearing assholes who didn't give a fuck about anything beyond what color leather trim they're getting on their new sectional sofa. There's no reason to think Millennials won't slide into the same shit as they age.
>>53770885
And you'll be made redundant.
>bot
>you can connect your existing bots
lel
>>53770887
Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium [spoiler]Windows Phone[/spoiler]
protip: subsitute "bot" with "butt" in your head and this presentation will immediately be 100x more fun
no one laughed :(
>bot directory
It's okay guys, they won't go rogue, r-right?
>>53770900
That isn't my primary job.
It prevents me from doing my real job, which is database architecture consulting.
The fact that I also support our internal apps is just a distraction.
>you all get to see code, and I can get some lunch
*wait
*wait
>Noonecares.jpg
bot framework leaked
Stop trying to make jokes Microsofties. None of you are funny.
>>53770916
"Ill say hi to my butt and it'll respond"
You're right
do something fun /g/
oh boy don't you guys just love subtle advertisements
>a bot is somehow better than a bunch of checkboxes on a page
>node.js and c#
kek
visual studio is pretty neat desu
>Dominos
They dont even have stuffed crust how can you call it a pizza
>That example of Cortana talking to the hotel's bots
Holy shit, you can now just get Cortana to order pizza from the Domino's bot, since you're so socially inept, you can't even carry a conversation with AI.
Argh
>>53770858
hear hear
How to build botnet, more at 11.
>Distinguished Engineer
>>53770962
Now combine it with a delivery bot.
The porn industry will never survive.
Why are they acting like they invented chatbots?
We can use this to remake Tay
"pretty cool, right?"
*Silence*
>restaurant owners will understand this
Bots delivering you things will be the future
is 'bots' a new meme?
>>53771012
inb4 ApplaudBots
>>53771009
They're making it piss-easy to develop and deploy your own chatbots linked to a hosted API.
Which is pretty fucking cool, actually.
TRIGGERED
>>53771025
They will probably outsource this to developers/developer companies.
MY CRIB IS SLANG FOR HOUSE
"Can you deliver 3 large pepperoni pizzas to my crib."
ay senpai get me 3 pizzas 2 tha crib llmao
>so you're laughing
>nobody was laughing
>>53771059
"sure nigga"
So where is the BIG SURPRISE?
Don't tell me it was the bash integration announcement.
Adult baby here, this is relevant to my interests.
>>53771073
"i gotchu famm"
for fucks sake we all joked about bot net bots. okay they were all real we knew that but they are turning bots to real A.I.
OMG JOHN CONNOR where are you, save us.
>>53771082
The botnet
Why not just use a normal interface, where you can pick your pizza?
>>53771054
>>53771059
>>53771066
>>53771073
>>53771090
MASH THAT MF LIKE BUTTON SENPAI
I really hope this is exploitable.
the new cock services?
>>53771103
bots are the future
>>53771111
Dem Quads
>>53771103
Botnet
>>53771111
Domino's acting like Tay, you mean?
Yes, I see opportunities.
Is that a jew
>>53771072
you just can't hear them because you're not using Microsoft's Hololens™ to fully immerse yourself in the presentation.
>she literally announces that you don't need to know coding in order to train the bot
>In a developer conference
>expects people to clap
>"I-isn't that cool?" begging the clapping
Ayyyy.
The bot will work like they do in Telegram, I reckon
REMOVE THE JEWESS ROASTIE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
GRUs honey pot has arrived!
From Russia, with tits
>>53771103
to use voice commands with cortana, the skynet
>>53771136
>yfw microsoft is actually taken over by holograms
>yfw satya is just a puppet controlled by holograms
>yfw you take off your hololens but the holograms do not disappear
>yfw holo uprising now
>>53771103
You can't really use "normal interface" with speech.
HOTTIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>53771131
>lots of people mark house as a person
All I see are her boobs
BASED COGNITIVE, WE CAN MAKE OUR OWN TAY, THE /G/ VERSION
https://www.microsoft.com/cognitive-services
Holy fucking shit, my dick.
I'm going to enhance my auto-generated shitposts with these.
http://captionbot.ai
>>53771182
>Personalize experiences with emotion recognition
My waifu can reach orgasm at the same time I am!
ok /g/ show the machine your dicks
>:I
I'm not a developer, but are these tools as impressive as I think they are? What they're showing now is stuff that anyone who wants to develop a program and needs e.g. camera recognition can just import and use right away in their program? Or am i completely wrong?
>>53771174
Do you have a pizza with mozerella?
>Hitler did nothing wrong
>>53771185
Someone link cheese pizza and report back
Bring on the gorillas
>laughing at her own shit because nobody else will
sad
>>53771203
You need Jesus
>>53771203
>are these tools as impressive as I think they are?
More so, even.
As a budding C# dev, my mouth is literally watering at getting my hands on these APIs and chatbots.
It's seriously really fucking cool from a data in / data out perspective.
>a book about giants
>a book about big guys
>>53771165
she's Romanian tho
>all this boring shit
>>53771165
Actually romanian
>microsoft pamant romanesc
REMOVE "IRELIVANT" SPEECH
she was kinda cute though
Gendering people. Fucking shitlords. I bet they don't use right pronouns
>>53771237
I spotted the unemployed freetard!
You could hear the audience getting amplified.
>>53771237
For devs, this shit is the most exciting thing so far.
APIs are an amazing resource for utilizing mass quantities of data that a large company like Microsoft have already refined.
Instead of attempting my own AI with rudimentary Markov Chains and other language processing, I can use these decades of research that Microsoft put in.
>>53771237
>boring shit
top kek, mate
These tools are really cool
found her https://www.linkedin.com/in/cornelia-carapcea-90a4298
>>53771260
The entire concept of pronouns is triggering to me. Report to diversity training to be reeducated.
>>53771266
kek, nice
>he has a future
>you don't
>blind coding
this explains a lot at microsoft
>>53771237
Do you even develop?
>Cortana as a virtual assistant to the blind
Neat.
>>53771291
Google Glasses BTFO
>>53771203
They are making things actually possible and much easier to develop.
I'd rate the conference higher if they stop catering for the consumers watching the livestream and focus on dev stuff.
>>53771296
"SHIT, what did I name that int?"
>A blind man achieved more than half of /g/ will ever did
Commit sudoku.
>>53771296
>I'll rationalize my incompetence with party-level remarks
kek
>he uses an iphone
This blind british poo in loo can get a job programming but linuxfags can't, top kek.
>MS truly innovating
>No one cares
>When's the next iphone coming out
Isnt this basically google glass?
>I thank allah™, el hamdulla, for making this possible
SERIOUSLY?!
Even as someone who can't code for shit, this seems really impressive.
okay that blind guy part was cool
ok, if this is possible it´s fucking amazing for blind people.
first actually cool thing
>>53771324
b-but I can escape the botnet
it wouldn't caption any pepe or Costanza. But paul worked
keked when he just stood their with the dumb face
>Microsoft actually hires blind coders
wew lawd
>>53771329
Half of /g/, it's quite sad.
never change /g/, never change
A E S T H E T I C MUSIC
Good this shit is over
Is it all ogre?
>>53771349
thats not nice anon...
[spoiler]I laughed too[/spoiler]
>no windows phone anything
pic related is cool tho
Rate Build first day
9/10
>>53771312
It's a keynote address. General overviews are the purpose of them. Watch the individual tech sessions for detailed information.
This is amazing
Windows Phone announcements when?
Did I miss it?
>>53771291
This video cemented this conference. This is what tabloids wanted and the got it. headlines and sensationalism.
>>53771349
>their
At least he's not as dumb as you
Alright it was ok, the biometrics over the internet thing is pretty stupid tho
>>53771387
WinPhone is dead m8
Sexy Scott Hanselman is sexy
>>53771349
>he just stood their
He's a fully employed programmer and you can't even type in English, kys.
We can bash on Windows now
>40yr old confused man
>20yr old happy woman
This isn't just for the blind. It's a tool for aspies to have a clue how to interact with others.
>I see an annoyed girl who was sending you fuck me signals but now wishes you were dead.
>Should I prep the pornbot for when you get home?
>>53771421
sick pun bro
welp windows phone is official dead
time to buy a feature phone
>>53771387
Windows Phone is going to be phased out in favor of Surface Communicators.
it's okay i guess
>go and google eh... bing "snow crash"
>go google
>GOOGLE OR
>BING
>>53771192
Anguilla is going to get rich selling .ai domain names.
>>53771483
not up to par with NSA facial recognition it seems
Wikipedia page for hololens says
>It was introduced with operating systems, such as Android, iOS and OS X on April 5, 2016.
What does this mean?
>>53771512
Anyone can edit wiki pages
>>53771511
It needs more training to perfect its recognition
>>53771457
mid-high kek
2016 year of the Windows desktop
Never bring a baseball bat to a gun fight.
look at that Pepsi(tm) he's casually holding
>>53771550
more like its the year consumers begin jumping ship because microsoft products are just to much of a headache anymore.
Fuck
>>53771588
kek
So can I compile CyanogenMod on Windows 10 or not
>>53771594
>jumping ship
>To windows 7
Just listen to yourslef
>>53771653
Use IE or Edge. Chrome doesn't play nice with some MS sites.
>>53771689
We don't know all the details yet.
>>53771743
have you dealt with consumers since windows 8 came out?
New thread when?
>>53771766
anyway the command lines is finally dead
>>53771827
>consumers
I don't work in sales or tech support so I don't know and I have almost no market research data, but no one jumped the ship anywhere but older Windows or mobile devices, you can see market data.
I know a lot of Linux users who finally got a job and bought their first Mac since Windows 8 release.
>>53771588
>>53771834
70 keks
caption sites sibling www.what-dog.net
>>53771882
Consumers don't like their shit fucked with, they're waking up to find W10 updates that break their system, they're not savy, They go buy a new PC they find W10 on it, they don't like it. WIndows is really becoming less and less consumer friendly, a nightmare to support from a tech support point of view, and the constant reinventing of the wheel is pushing other costumers away. What is the reason today to continue using WIndows as a platform for industries that just need their shit to work?
more about the bot framework, coming in hot
>>53772014
most of them woke up to Windows 10 and it did nothing. Some pros woke uo to 10 and it broke some and they started bitching.
W10 doesn't go down, and if people did want to back out of it, there are plenty of ways.
Don't worry, if people will back out, they will go with Apple MacBook.
And people use Windows because it works and has all the shit they want and used to with 0 headache, unless they try to be smart and fuck with system.
is there going to be something about the w10m ?
/g/, please
>>53772112
List of sessions
https://channel9.msdn.com/Events/Build/2016
>butt connector
>interface in your butt
>your butt has to be available on the internet
>all the pieces are pluggable
>debug your butt
>mfw i'm twelve
>showing how to build a bot to buy and sell stocks
SHUT IT DOWN
>>53772331
dohohohoho
The BOT SAW JOHN CENA
>skynet is between us
![ctvdez[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/HkonQEi.png "ctvdez[1]"){kind=small}
![ctcqfk[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/kv53PR3.png "ctcqfk[1]"){kind=small}
![ovktko[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/450e4kv.png "ovktko[1]"){kind=small}
![kbjfvn[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/Tmthfv9.png "kbjfvn[1]")
