>>37387238
use your self hate as a propellant

>>37387238
I don't know man, I'm not suicidal. Have you tried opening up to someone and seeking professional help? Depression can't always be something that goes away through sheer willpower

>>37387238
>suicidal every other day

That's perfect - find an eod routine and work out on the days that you're not suicidal.

I just put a scoop of pre workout in my mouth and swallow it with water then 10 minutes later I feel like lifting

>>37387238

It's tough, man. It took me almost two years of battling with major depressive disorder and an alcohol dependency to finally get my ass back in the gym. But once I forced myself back into a routine, things began to dramatically improve, and I'm feeling infinitely better today than I did 3 months ago when I stopped drinking and was weened off of anti-depressants.

Also, I can't over emphasize how important professional mental health support is. I was seeing an addictions councillor, a therapist, a psychiatrist, and my regular doctor. I would see at least two of these people twice a week for about 18 months for therapy or check-ups.

Shit's tough. I came dangerously close to completing suicide, but whenever I experience my worst moments, I was always at home, and I just couldn't stand the thought of my spouse finding my body when she woke up in the morning. I'd be covered in my own blood before I'd realize what I was doing, put on a bath robe, grab a beer, sit on my patio (at 3 in the morning), and call the suicide hotline so I could talk to someone that could calm me down.

I don't think she knows just how true it is when I tell her that I'm alive today because of her.

>>37387238
Do you already lift?

If you don't try to do it, i mean it, before lifting i felt like shit, not suicidal though, but when i started lifting i felt tired but full of energy at the same time, i started feelling happy and shit, and the best part was sleeping, after my first day at the gym i fell sleep as soon as i hitted my bed, i didn't spent all nigth overthinking stupid things that made me felt down all the time.

Just try to get started. You will feel better about yourself and it can really help you in the longterm for feeling better mentaly.

It worked for me, and its commonly advised by doctors.

>>37387238
You don't.

Not everyone makes it. Thats why you see fat pieces of shit walking around everywhere you go. You can just be one of them.

>>37387919
>>37387438
Also this. Way better written then i can do on My phone

The toughest steel is forged in the hottest fires.

You'll get through this OP

>>37387238
>>>/r9k/ plz go

>just lift
nothing else matters
just hit those numbers m90 the h-h-hold me