Who HEMORRHOID here? Tell your story please.
>doing squats
>funny feeling appears in butt
I think I got them randomly. Tender for a while and felt like something was escaping from my ass.
Don't hurt anymore but they're still there
>>36256321
pharmacist here
>whack some proctosedyl on them after you take a shit
>do not strain to take a shit
>eat more fiber
>do not sit or stand for too long
>push them back inside
Starting Strength thread?
>>36256369
>push them back inside
I would recommend leaving them alone until they go away
t. not a pharmacist
I think all the doctors in my city are retarded. I went to like 5 different people and got 5 different answers ranging from lol its nothing to anal fissure to hemorrhoids to hemorrhoidal irritation or whatever the fuck its called.
My symptoms boil down to
>constipation (not chronic, but I do get a lot of it, even though I eat gallon of fiber a day)
>occasional discomfort during physical activity, not pain, just discomfort
>weird spasms, like if the asshole contracts randomly
>used to bleed but no more
How common this shit in general?
>>36256477
it's not shit, its ruptured blood vessels in your anus.
>>36256321
Well, yes and no. Long story inbound
>always an over zealous pooper
>always tried to shit as quickly as possible
>one night before bed I do my biz and I feel uncomfortable afterwards
>go to sleep
>wake up and I can't sit down on anything
>attempting to shit would take hours and I'd almost black out from the pain
>too embarrassed to tell parents (HS freshman at the time)
>over time it gets better but it still hurts/feels uncomfortable when walking or sitting
>eventually tell doctor during a normal physical almost a year or two later
>she inspects my pooper and sees nothing
>directs me to local ass doctor
>sitting in waiting room with mom, some chick that probably took it in the dumper too hard and a ton of old farts
>mom keeps telling me that it's alright and we're here (the office) so I feel better
>does this loud enough that other people can hear
>tell her to stop
>she doesn't
>tell her to shut up when the lady comes out and calls my name
>she's visibly upset
>fuck
>directs me to room
>the doctor is my best friend from elementary school's dad
>fucking mortified because I know for a fact this guy recognized me and now he's going to explore my shitter
>the examination was painful as fuck and him saying "most people squirm around" in broken English every few minutes didn't help
>get out an apologize to mom
>do like 3 more of these checkups, recommends colonoscopy to rule out ass cancer and deep ass 'rhoids
>drink the gallon of mucus flavored trash they give you so your system is empty when they skewer you
>ass is raw from wiping all day for two days
>go in for treatment
>lady misses the IV more than 8 times
>I get knocked out
>wake up and throw up every time I walk
>get home
>my mom said while I was still asleep she and my friend's dad caught up
>roll over and contemplate suicide
>they never found anything wrong
>shit for 2+ hours daily
>just like to sit on the toilet and shitpost on my phone, only really shit for about 10 minutes
>no hemorrhoid
>been doing it for years
I had one and bled every shit but I did a colon cleanse and thet went away, for now...
My shits are a lot more pleasant now too though.
I shit just more blood and thats when I knew I had to do something. No insurance. Its all gone now, thank god. I did a seven day oxy powder colon cleanse. Kinda sucked, because its advised you stick to fruit and vegetables. It was worth it. Im so happy ;_;
>>36257250
Correction: I shit just pure blood once, thats when I knew I needed to do something.
It was freaky shit! I knew I had to shit but then just blood happened so spoopy!
>>36256321
One time I partied and ate like shit for a week after eating clean for 6 months and my ass was destroyed by the end of the week. Pretty sure I developed hemorrhoids that took almost another week to go away.
I literally had to call out of work because I got no sleep due to taking painful shits all night. It felt like someone stabbed me in the asshole with a hot poker every time I shit. I am never putting myself through that again.
>>36257080
>they never found anything wrong
my worst fucking nightmare
>>36257331
Years later it still pains me to think about it. After that all irritation/pain/discomfort stopped so I guess it was worth it
>have a shit
>toilet water is bright red
>>36256321
I was just at the doctor cause I shat a load of blood on Monday and Wednesday. Not sure what caused it yet, I'm hoping it wasn't butt cancer. Waiting on blood test results.
I shat a massive turd yesterday though and a more normal one today without turning the toilet red so hopefully it was just some freak occurrence. Don't think I've got hemmeroids though. I'd rather that than cancer though obviously. Wish me luck bros cause I'm shitting it, no pun intended.
>>36257506
Enjoy your Rectal Fissure my friend
>>36257633
;_;
Pls tell my doctor than because he didn't know at all.
>>36256321
What do you have if your shits are not red but wiping your ass gives a stripe of blood?
>>36257957
cut anus
>>36257992
Thx
I had a really shitty diet when i was a kid with little to no fiber so i got them a bit when i was at school but the worst was during boot camp when i joined the army, i got really sick and put in the army hospital for a few days and coughed so much all the pressure caused hemorrhoids. I had to get a certificate and show it to the Corporal before every lesson because yelling made them worse.
Since then i have improved my diet and havent had them for over 10 years.
>>36257506
I used to get the same thing, when i did a shit the toilet would look like a murder scene there was so much blood. I went to the doctor and he said as long as the blood is bright red it is coming from low down in your digestive system and isnt a huge problem, if it is dark blood you in trouble.
Turned out it was just my body getting used to eating so much yogurt, for some reason it made my ass bleed, it stopped after a few months.
I'm pretty sure I've had the same teensy ones since I was six years old at least, since I remember it hurting like a bitch for some reason when I had the shower head aimed at my bumhole at that age (which it still does).
So question is, does this shit ever go away by itself? It's so small that surgically removing it seems silly, but annoying enough for me to want to do something about it.
>>36258110
We'll that's what I'm hoping. I haven't really changed my diet though, although I was at a wedding the Saturday before the Monday it first happened and I drank heavily for the first time in months. Might have been that I suppose... As long as it's not anything like ass cancer I'm fine with it.
Don't have rrhoids but my asshole itches daily no matter what I do. I will shower, scrub my asshole while spreading it open, clean it with everything I have. Then 8 hours later WITHOUT TAKING A SHIT I will feel itchy, wipe, and there will be a shit smell and sometimes a small bit of shit on the paper.
So basically my anus is leaking and I don't know why. Never fingered it.
I have internal ones and enjoy buttsex. They don't hurt normally or on insertion but on the way out it hurts. Can I get rid of them with work or am I fucked?
ITT: everybody is butthurt
>>36258327
I honestly had no idea it was the yogurt. I didnt think i had changed my diet but that one thing caused so many problems. Look at anything that has changed and stop it and see if the blood goes away.
>>36258392
>So basically my anus is leaking and I don't know why
I get that too. My ass cheeks will feel like they are sliding together so i go to the toilet and wipe and there is liquid shit in my ass.
>>36256466
Stop eating fiber and start eating two table spoons of coconut oil a day. It's anti-inflammatory and makes your shit roll out like a train.
>>36258834
Just apply loads of coconut oil. It's anti inflammatory and great lube.
>>36256477
I don't know. Aren't lifting plugs designed to prevent this?
>>36256321
currently have massive external hemorrhoid after making big changes to my diet (stopped drinking alcohol and coffee, cut way back on calories, added a lot of fiber). i was constipated for days and then finally had an extremely hard anus stretching shit last week. i am not in constant discomfort anymore, but it still hurts to shit and i am still getting blood streaks on the toilet paper. going to give it a few more days before i see my doctor.
I have an external one, when I have to push hard the toilet water turns red. I've been eating oatmeal almost everyday and taking stool softener almost daily as well. Hemorrhoid is getting smaller all the time. Still drink coffee and alcohol, heck having a beer right now.
>>36259144
That shit isn't going away on its own, they'll be able to snip/freeze it off long before it naturally heals (if it ever does)
>getting hemorrhoids
>FROM squats
You fucked up. Squats are like the best way to prevent that shit. Stop hard-flexing your cornhole while lifting.
>>36258392
Stop eating greasy food.
/fit/ all has massively fucked up anuses
colour me suprised
i think i have one but it literally doesnt hurt, like not at all
is that a normal thing because ive been led to expect unholy pain coming from my anus when its basically just a welt that wont go away, im half expecting my ass to explode in blood and terror if i keep going on like its not there
>>36259111
Your posts reads like it was written by a Coen Brothers character.
>>36259696
The small ones are just a precursor to making a mistake, but they're also the easiest to get rid of. Just don't shit too hard (so make sure you don't eat a bunch of garbage that'll plug you up), keep exercising, take a hot bath a couple times a week, and you'll be fine. It'll clear up in no time at all.
>>36256321
Anyone ever see them on women?
>5 years ago
>fucking a hot Ukranian milf
> bend her over, see roid mass coming off her ass hole, had to be the side of a few grapes
>fuck her anyway
Every time after that I never looked at it directly, but still felt those roids bouncing on my dick...
tips from a guy who's been anally probed multiple times by ass doctors to no avail
>stop shitting so hard
>make potty time routine every day
>eat oats/grains/yogurt
>cut out greasy foods
>drink more water
>stop using phone on the shitter, do the biz and get out
>avoid holding in farts when possible
follow these tips and you'll be making nice logs in no time
also, being fingered in the ass by an young qt asian nurse was an A+ experience, would do again
Just had hemorrhoidectomy two weeks ago. Worst fucking pain of my life.
Mine were external, probably congenital because my diet and lifestyle are healthy. They usually put you under and/or give you a spinal block for the surgery, but my insurance is garbage and id have to pay out of pocket, so I opted for a local because it was significantly cheaper. I had read accounts online of how horrible recovery is, and it's true. The doctor didn't fax my scrip, but instead handed me one to be filled, so I had to drive to the busy pharmacy, give them the scrip, and wait. Meanwhile, the local is rapidly wearing off, and the second most innervated part of my body was on fire. I almost cried in the cvs. You definitely want to stay ahead of the pain.
Except, the pain meds they gave me were Tylenol 3, which is like giving a gunshot victim fucking baby aspirin. Not that it mattered, pain meds are constipating, which will exasorbate your problems when you eventually shit, so I tried to avoid them. I hadn't smoked weed in five years, but it was the only thing that took the edge off of both the pain and the fear of shitting. First shit was on day three, honestly felt like I was being ripped open, I can't imagine what it would have been like without the weed. Bit a towel to not concern my neighbors. Got over the hump around day 6, and now I'm perfectly fine.
Only problem is, the swelling hasn't gone down completely. In particular, I have a pea sized welt that I suspect is a new fucking hemorrhoid. Kill me.
Moral of the story: avoid surgery at all costs, unless the pain is truly unmanageable by other means, or the bleeding is making you anemic.
