Missed opportunities at the gym/autist thread?
Just realized I had my shot today:
>In college
>See qt that I know at the rec
>Say I'm checking what my bf% is
>She mentions she thinks she lost weight
>"Ok see you later"
I had my chance, I could have said she looked good or some shit.
Anyone have stories?
>be working at homeless shelter first day
>qt co worker girl and I are talking
>she mentions she's wearing a lot of layers
>I said yeah me too
>she said my top's cuter than yours
>I say yeah
>could have said yeah well it suits you then
fuck. why always
>>34834946
You: "I'm checking what my bodyfat percentage is."
Her: "I think I lost weight."
You totally could've fucked her bro
So what is your BF%?
>>34835000
Literally just wanted to be capable of giving a girl a compliment, couldn't even do that
>>34835012
It was actually too low for the device to measure, however I'm pretty skelly so that's not too much of an achievement
>>34834946
>there's "she"
>she thinks I'm cool
>she constantly eye-fucks me
>me has just left his gf
>have been with psycho bitch gf for 4 long years
>unsure what to do with "she"
>"she" is a 7/10
>talk with friend and tell him to please take care of "she"
>me talks with female friend and say that I don't want to play the mindless sex game
>night passes by
>everyone has fun
>me remains alone
>have a walk outside of the party
>"she" is on her knees behind a tree
>my friend is taking care of her
>I look at the sky
>no moon, the stars are beautiful
>maybe I'm a faggot, in the end it doesn't matter
we're just all autists it's always been like that, we will never change
just kill me
>>34834946
>be at bar
>hot girl that knows you as a semi regular
>comes up to you and your friends looks you in the eyes and says "haven't seen you in a while!"
>respond with "yeah" and think about what beer to get.
>>34835200
been there, done that
there has been a long period in my life where my first reply was constantly autismal/non-sympathetic/awkward/ill-timed
then I've learned to shut down or at least pause my thoughts when someone approached me and to mirror their behaviour - possibly anticipating their expected outcome of the conversation
>>34835149
lmao at the fucking taco
haven't keked all week up till now
thank you
>>34834946
You think shes gonna fuck you because you said she looks good? Dudes fucking compliment her 24/7 m8
>>34835397
>Implying I was tryin2fugg
I'm literally just trying to find an opportunity for me to give a girl a compliment
>>34835411
>trying to give a girl a compliment
>have qt, maybe 7/10 coworker
>constantly tries to get under my skin, makes comments about me all the time
>wear suit one day for work thing
>"god, anon, you always look great!"
>"thanks"
>hate myself because of autism
The ride never ends, boys.
>>34835424
Nice
Happened today
>Ask a fit chick chick if she's using a bench, she says take it. Life continues.
>5m later she tells me between my reps that her friend doesn't believe that she can squat 1pl8 and she wants me to record her
>holy hell, 4chan hasn't prepared me for females. I tell her I'll do it.
>She does squats and I almost fuck up the recording because snapchat makes you hold the record button, apparently. Almost fucking up the recording puts gives me the autism panic/adrenaline. I managed to record the end of her set but snapchat only does 10sec videos so it's fine.
>She high fives me after and says you're the best, thanks so much, blah blah.
>I'm still recovering from the adrenaline and trying not to look as scared as I feel about fucking that up.
>Manage to recover, overall and up'd my max bench/a few other pr's.
>No way in hell I'm good enough to ask for her number even though I had a shot.
>Maybe someday, though.
>Hope I see her around.
God, she was fit though. Not the cardio bunny sort, but legit definition.
>>34835705
>holy hell, 4chan hasn't prepared me for females
kek, lgbt's just around the corner.
No but good job keep at it
>>34835705
kek this reminds me of the following time
>at sisters graduation from uni
>wearing a suit and looking fancy
>asian famiry comes up to me and asks to take a photo of them with their daughter (who was hot btw)
>I aim the camera at them, and like an autist ask "do you want zoom?"
>they say no and hesitate a bit like "wtf just take the picture" (they didn't say anything really)
>I'm like "okay" np
>I snap the most retarded photo that has like 80% sky and just their upper torso in it
>I hand it back to them and I'm like there you go
>I turn my head away and never look back towards them
Pretty sure they got some other guy to take a photo of them afterwards. Kek
>>34835149
couldn't even read your story because you typed it like such a faggot
>be in computer science
>go to help room to get some help
>looking around for the TA for my class
>cute girl walks in
>must be a freshman
>stare into each other's eyes for 6 seconds
>realize this is a little odd
>look away and find the TA
Maybe she thought I was a TA or something
![5968872[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/GFV0D4b.jpg "5968872[1].jpg")
>waiting for class to start
>the class that was there already slowly starts to leave
>8/10 standing by the door with me
>look at her into the eyes with a straight face and say "Just get the fuck out already, am I right?"
>tears form in her eyes and she runs away
What did I do wrong, /fit/?
>>34835930
lmao
>>34835149
0/10 didn't read
but that webm... fuckin lost
>>34834946
what am I supposed to do when someone is showing me their ass and checking me out
just be like
"nice ass bro"?
I really don't know how I should respond
I've been seeing this qt at my gym for about a year and we talk every few weeks and hit it off great...then the next time we see eachother it's like nothing happened.
>>34834946
The first step to being Alpha is to NEVER CONFESS BETA ACTS.
You are above it.
It doesn't mean you ignore them.
They just never happen
>>34834946
not at the gym, but when i was 18 in high school i dated a girl at the end of senior year for like a month. and we loved each other hardcore but her father was abusive (i found out later) and i kind of just let her slip away. her dad didn't let her have a cellphone. i just told myself it wasn't my fault and cut it as a loss. i regret not taking action. i could've bought her a track phone and kept in contact with her. i could've driven to see her. i could've kidnapped her from her dad and taken her somewhere safe and the fact that i did nothing is burned into the back of my brain and i see her every time i close my eyes. and this was 3 years ago
>>34836060
Do you know where she is now? Any chance you can reconnect?
But don't blame yourself man, abuse is a massive thing and at 18 you couldn't have realistically saved her.
>>34835930
>>34835955
>saving thumbnails
reddit pls go
>>34836087
M-my 4chan folder was lost when my hard drive crashed
I just searched for a picture on google :'(
>>34836100
probably a blessing in disguise
>>34836078
i've already tracked her down once already and she's dating a fat middle aged dude. threw me out of wack for a while
>>34835838
Thanks
>>34835705
WELL SO DONT BE AN AUTIST AND WHEN SHE IS BACK, ASK HER IF SHE SHOWED THE VIDEO TO HER FRIEND
STEP 2, KEEP TALKING ABOUT ANYTHING
STEP 3 ASK FOR HER NUMBER
NOT THAT HARD
dumbass
>>34836170
I know that feel bro
I know it all too well
>at least she found someone who could make her happy in the end...
>it wasn't me
>>34836780
Fuck man, those are the worst feels that keep me up at night.
>go into gym for workout
>head over to do squats
>on my way over notice someone i haven't seen before
>he's at the benchpress
>resting in between sets, looking at some framed picture
>think it's a little weird but whatever
>start doing squats
>see in the mirror this guy is pumping the empty bar up and down really fast
>his tempo is way off but at least he's doing empty bar to start
>immediately after he finishes doing reps, sits up and pulls picture out again
>stares at picture in between sets
>alright now i'm curious
>after set take my water bottle and go to fill it up even though it's already full
>walk past this guy and see he has a framed picture of emma stone
>that he stares at in between sets
>not even fucking joking
>smile a bit and try hard to hold back laughing
>fill my bottle, go back to squat rack
>as i walk past this guy is PUMPING the empty bar
>start uncontrollably smiling
>seriously can't stop smiling, eyes begin to water trying not to laugh
>back at squat rack, start squatting again
>guy who i have occasional chats with is doing lat pulldowns next to squat rack
>notices me squatting with this giant stupid grin on my face
>"how you doing man? having a good day or something?"
>look at him, and then at myself in the mirror
>i'm at the top of my set with the bar on my shoulders, eyes are red and i'm smiling
>"j-just doing some h-happy squats"
>see the guy on the bench looking at the picture again, he literally has his hand on the photo
>think of /fit/ and "lift for swift" threads we used to have
>start to lose it
>slam the barbell into the rack and run for the bathroom so i can burst out laughing
TO THIS FUCKING DAY my gym buddy still calls me out on "happy squats" and that fucking guy is STILL going after 2 months looking at the picture of emma stone
I got mired by a gay guy today. Felt awkward af
>>34836946
>2015
>not doing happy squats
>not supersetting w/ 45lbs bench
>>34836946
Pls snap a sneaky photo next time.
>>34834946
>HS year senior
>in a school club
>anual school competition
>go to school thats hosting the competition
>prolly like 8-10 school clubs competeting
>after all the work we're all chilling
>im with my group of friends having blast
>girl near me starts talkin to me
>"hey, whats up? Whats your name? :)"
>"hmm? Oh, hey, anon; thats my name"
>go back to fucking around with my group
>she leaves
Funny thing is two months later we have state competition and i meet a girl while at it and spend whole night with her kissing and flirting. Turns out it was the same girl, didnt even recognize her until she told me about how i ignored her.
>>34836946
Hey, I've read this before :^)
>>34835705
What were her proportions like breh?
I'm totally oblivious to any kind of flirting and even if I would notice it I wouldn't know what to do.
>"You look good anon."
>A-alright. Kthanksbye.
Pls kill me.
>>34836013
Just say nice with an Australian accent
>>34837626
Yeah, I don't believe anyone has tried flirting with me before but if they have I wouldn't have known it. In a diagnosed sperg though.
Not at the gym but meh
>at friends house for halloween
>we're playing a murder mystery role playing type of game
>I'm an ex-military guy, friend of mine is a police detective
>you're supposed to find out who murdered some guy at a casino by talking to people and getting clues etc.
>this one girl is role playing as a pole dancer
>sits down next to me on the couch
>bluntly asks if I have a pole for her to dance on
>avoid eye contact
>she keeps staring at me with a wicked smile
>touches my leg
>not sure if trolling or genuine
>ask her if she's a good dancer
>she says: oh yeah I'm really good
>mutter something about getting a drink
>awkwardly walk to the fridge and grab a beer
>try to hide boner for the next 5 minutes by leaning on the kitchen table
>>34835149
IN THE END IT DOESN'T EVN MATTER.
>>34838765
It was genuine brah
>>34834946
Not really autistic imho, but yesterday at a party I declined 3 5/10's who all said I was really hot and wanted to fuck. I had no desire whatsoever ;_; Is fit making me gay? just asking senpai
>>34835149
You need some practice on writing desu
>>34834946
why are you wasting time talking at the gym when you only need a minute between sets?
>>34835149
That webm is glorious
Not at the gym but fuck you deal with it.
>Out having a bit of drink
>This new girl is out
>She's tons of fun, hit it off real good
>Score her number pretty much instantly
>Go home for a quick drank run and offer her some of my moonshine and homebrew
>She slams it down
>Ask her if she wants a refill
>"No Anon, I want to go home"
No fucking shit you wanna go home, you don't just slam like half a glass of pretty much pure alcohol
>She goes and throws the fuck up, comes back home looking like a mess
>Boner activated
>Figure this is my chance to end the pussy drought
>Get her up and get her dressed
>She lives pretty much nearby, but suddenly she's in no walking shape
>Fucking perfect, got a massive fetish for dead drunk near-unconscious helpless girls just laying there like dead fish
>Figure I'll just carry her, farmer's carrying what looks like sub-1pl8 for 300 meters ain't shit
>Wait fuck I got this really good jacket on me, wouldn't want her to ruin that
>Call the taxi
>Tell the taxi dude where she lives and see them off
>Go back to the party
>wait fuck I'm not supposed to be here now
>be at end of wedding reception
>earlier had been talking to 10/10 that I hadn't seen in many years
>standing to get my coat
>she's standing next to me and says
>"it was really good seeing you again. i really missed you."
>feels goodman
>turn to say something like "we should get together again"
>realize she's talking on her phone
>take coat and leave
>>34835149
>that fucking webm
Also, you type like a fucking retard. Seek help
I was I a squat rack and a girl asked me how many sets I got. I told her I love her and I want her to marry me.
She walked away. Talking about missed opportunity, amirite
>Be 15 years ago
>In class with crush
>crush ask me out
>told her it was a good joke
>she seems embarrassed
>Drop school 2 month later to work
She was really qt, too bad I was a complete retard at the time.
>>34835149
>>34835149
10/10 dog.
>>34840621
>told her it was a good joke
holy shit
>there's this qt at the gym who I frequently exchange glances and smiles with, we say hi sometimes
>no real convo yet
>see her again yesterday
>she got onto the platform with one of those racks without the safety bars
>I was deadlifting, she started squatting
>sadly, she is one of those girls who squats 30kg maximum for 8 shabby reps
>ask if I can take the two 10kg plates at her platform
>"Sure take 'em, I'm not strong enough to use those teehee"
>"k thx"
I should have said something man. "Sure you are, but if you're not using them" or something more open than "k thx" or just asking anything about training or whatever. Thanks based residual awkwardness from back when I was a robot.
>>34840507
fuuuucckkk
>>34835149
Wtf is wrong with you and your dumb way of greentexting?
Also wtf is wrong with that dog
>>34835302
Same. I've found that if you keep your silence while thinking about your reply and meanwhile look from where you were looking to her eyes, you can get enough time to think of a good response.
>>34834946
You had your chance at what? lol?!?!
Talking to a girl? hahahahah
I haven't been here long guys but it seems that y'all are some serious retards.
>Last week
>A girl I went to primary school with shows up
>Went to visit her fat friend
>Talk for a bit then she and her friend go away
>Texts me that I should delete the pics she sent me
>I ain't doin that shit. Text that to her
>She responds "fine but imma make myself cum looking at the pics you sent.
>Tell her that if she comes to my place it won't be her who she'll make cum
>Think she will take it as a joke
>10mins later she shows up
>Open the door stoned AF
>Look at her
>She a 6/10 with amazing boobs and a little chub.
>Think to myself - I don't wanna hit that
>Tell her to go away
>My at the time already over the top confidence goes through the roof
Friends say I'm a retard. I just want a bigger challenge.
>>34837176
It's not his original story. Sadly, you wont get a photo.
>>34835705
Well it could've been worse. You could have said something like "Lel pls who can't squat 1 plate does your friend even lift"
>be me filthy smelly nigger
>committing crimes with my bros dartrell and tyrel
>one of the houses we breaks into has this fine ass white girl
>attempt to hit on her while holding her at gun point she really feeling me
>my boy dartrell accidentally shoots himself in the face posing with a gun for his instagram
>my boy tyrel freaks out and accidentally shoots the white girl
>cops show up he is arrested
>have funeral for dartrell and weep for tyrel who is now in jail
>both were very intelligent young niggers and skillful very good people and they didn't deserve to die or get sent to jail
>dartrell was gonna be SEO and tyrel was gonna release a good ass rap album
>I protest tyrels arrest in the black lives matter movement making me miss the opportunity to commit more crime to buy jordans
>>34834946
you soiled it
>>34839708
you have self-respect. why would you fuck a 5/10? keep going son you're making it
>>34835149
your story was frustrating af to read you faggot.
i only kept reading because i assumed "she" was actually a tranny in the end. good job asshole
>at friend's house for the weekend
>it's a sleepover
>somehow end up sleeping in a bedroom with two girls
>hot as hell, so I'm just sleeping shirtless
>girls are still in the bathroom
>tired as fuck, decide to close eyes and try to go to sleep
>they enter the bedroom and think I'm asleep
>girl 1: "lol anon is already asleep"
>girl 2: "Omg I know what I'm gonna dream about tonight!"
>girl 1: "ewww"
>not sure if good or bad
>>34835149
bredy gud
>>34836946
emma stone is an ugly cunt
>>34838765
how the fuck do you even have friends
>>34841042
yea what a freak kek
>>34841061
god that movie sucked
am I the only one that avoids trying to stare at girls at the gym?
I dont want to come off as a creep. I will take a glance occasionally but I never stare, even if they have dat ass.
>>34841083
Fuck off pleb
>>34835705
lmao1pl8
>>34841088
Me too. I just stare at myself in the mirror or at the walls/floor. I'm already the guy who doesn't talk to people, I don't want to be the guy who doesn't talk to people AND the guy who stares at women.
>>34841096
it did. you want good movies?
watch the pusher trilogy and dancer in the dark.
birdman was pretentious horse shit.
>>34841088
Nope. Hate when I'm on a bench like pic related and a hot girl sits on the bench next to me. How the fuck are you supposed to act inbetween sets. I always drink water and fuck around on my mp3 to avoid looking.
15 minute conversation about video games and metal music with 8/10 qt with zelda tattoos.
>Her - "Alright I think I gotta get going."
>Me - "Ok, I'm going to finish up here."
Solid 5 second pause
>Her - "Maybe I'll see you around sometime."
>Me - "Yeah, I'll see ya."
she leaves
Then the most magically rare thing that has ever happened, happened. She asked for my number the next time I saw her.
fast forward to our "date"
>Go to a bar that has an open mic
>I get fucking hammered because i'm 22 and it's my first date with a girl ever
>I end up going up and doing stand-up comedy
>I have a couple jokes about my dick being huge and everyone turns around and looks at her and asks if it's true
>She stays silent and I continue my joke
>3 people laugh
>I get even more drunk, she stops drinking
>I black out and wake up in her bed fully clothed the next day
>We go get mexican food and don't talk the entire time because i'm hungover as fuck
>She texts me the next day saying that all she can do is offer me friendship
>I say if I'm around you then I'll develop feelings for you so maybe we shouldn't be friends
>She doesn't respond
>Comes in to my work about 2 weeks later with a guy
That was 3 years ago and I haven't talked to a girl that isn't a family member outside of work since then. I've been permabulking and scaring children on the street.
>>34841160
Goddamn
>>34841141
one scenario I was in
>doing lateral raises behind benches/mirrors
>girl starts doing good mornings in front of me, not close but close enough
>trying with the force of zeus not to look at her
I really dont want to come off as a creep. im human, and want to look, but dont want to be "that guy" that creeps in the gym.
>>34841010
>be me sleeping over at friends house with a bunch of other people we are going to the beach then the casino
>girl invites me to sleep in the bed with them just two hot girls and me sleeping together shirtless
>have a crazy sex dream about both of them
>wake up one of the girls says she feels sick and can't go anymore and drives all the way home
>I know i talk in my sleep
i hope i didnt sleep rape her i am pretty bad at sleeping when im drunk ive done some weird things which mostly involve yelling punching and smashing
>>34840873
I like your energy. You did that very well. I think you might be in the wrong place though.
>>34841160
>I've been permabulking and scaring children on the street.
Keep up the great work
>>34840873
And /pol/ and /fit/ get closer to singularity every day
>>34839862
I was on my way to check my bf%, I wasn't lifting at the time
>>34837626
I feel you, I don't know how to have a non-platonic conversation
>>34835149
fvckin saved 10/10 would share my taco bell with doggie
>>34841160
I'd be your friend, fuck that wench. You sound hilarious.
>>34841141
I'm handsome, so I just eye-fuck them and tell them I was watching their form.
>>34835149
Mighty topkek at that webm.
wtf is wrong with that doge tho?
Does he have some sort of visual condition?
Also why the shit do you type like such a fag?
Was the girl giving head to your friend?
>>34835149
that webm is pretty much the story of my life desu
>>34835149
My seids on that webm
>>34835930
>>34841088
I really like lookign, but i refuse to give them the satisfaction of being so easily controlled.
>>34835149
My side senpai
>Get fat
>Lose it
>People are keen
>Try
>Get so nervous I go soft
>Happened with three people now
Thanks anxiety, you've been a great help.
:-(
>>34843208
are you me?
had the exact same number of attempts
worst feel ever, thinking of popping a benzo before sex :(
>>34843938
I have viagra but I hear there's a number of side effects and I'd rather not get into the mind set of "I need a pill to have sex".
But, then, it might let me get over my jitters? Who knows?
