How do you overcome poor social skills on the path to success?
I know I'm not the only one here with this problem.
You work on them.
It's like any skill.
develop them one skill at a time.
>>1132420
By socializing. Yeah, that's it. Get off your comfort zone and start making c9nversations.The more you do, the more experience you'll get and it will become natural. Anxiety comes from being an unknown behaviour.
Also, you'll find out which subjects you dominate, which don't, and which topics are cringe worthy so they should be approached carefully
Also stop going on 4chan.
That's the first step to improving social skills. This website is cancer
>>1132430
This. It's a very long journey that you will have to start on a theoretical basis. Read books about these topics. I started with things such as 48 laws of power, then books about social engineering, then about body language, the art of war, the hagakure etc. Basically books about mental strength - in any form imaginable.
"Social Engineering" by Christopher Hadnagy is pretty good as each chapter ends with excercises that you do in real life. You must also study charismatic people through Youtube and copy them each day, always improving a little bit. Try to emulate people that have a calm confidence - Chris Gardner, Kevin O'Leary, Les Brown, Robert Herjavec etc. Don't try to become the stereotypical, hyperactive salesman. I know it sounds cringy to some people, but believe me, I have been in your shoes and this is the only way. You can't just "go in", "talk with people" as men like us have no inate social skills, which just haven't been used.
No, we must forge these skills completely from scratch.
It is a rewarding journey however as after about 7 years of actively practicing this I would consider myself elite in every social discipline. No, I want to become world class at this. Perhaps you will want this one day, too.
Good luck.
>>1132478
Thanks for the informative response
I've saved your recommendations for future reference
>>1132439
i concur, alas i dont follow this advice myself
>>1132478
maybe its just me, but "trained" charisma is the most obvious thing in the world, and can make it easier for someone to deceive you.
i was looking for some stuff on elicitation though, so thanks :)
And OP, its okay not to be good at socialising, and once you realise that you'll be better off than any "elite".
Try to socialise more so you can practice, review any hiccups at the end of the day. First ask yourself what could have gone better, then ask yourself why do you feel it SHOULD have gone better.
Again, showing that you are perfectly fine with being terrible will help you much more than trying to manhandle the interaction.
jes b urself bro
>>1132420
>By socializing.
This. Its painful at first, kind of like the first few weeks of working out, or playing a new fighting game.
Its terrible, but the only way you can get out is to practice on people who you may never see again.
Work in retail
I see and talk to 100+ people a day, it takes some getting used to but eventually it becomes so normal it comes automatically to socialize
Or you end up hating people so don't get a bad retail job I guess
>>1132687
>paying for books
>>1132687
I agree. at best you can learn to fake it a little better, but if you're awkward because of an abusive childhood or whatever you're pretty much fucked unless you take drugs
>>1132692
Faking is easy. But it will nonetheless mentally drain a beta robot like OP.
He should just stick to low testosterone careers like a network/systems engineer or database admin
>>1132687
Not true.. You might not get to be chad thundercock tier but anyone can get to non-cringe tier and have a normal conversation unless you have actual autism, and even then It's still possible just not guaranteed
>>1132698
that's what I did and it's still hell because le "agile software development" meme makes it normie central. I guess I need to learn a more obscure language so I can work alone.
>>1132687
Unless OP has aspergers he is more than capable to socialize. It's really not hard, only taking the firsts steps can prove some difficulty
>>1132692
keep running away, faggot.
>>1132741
No one has mentioned this yet, join a improv class or something for funsies. Theatre in general is a very good way to learn social skills, you learn about body language, intonation, projection, and improvising in both a theoretical and practical context. Improv will teach you how to speak while focusing on the person, rather than planning out the entire conversation as they're trying to engage you or vice versa.
>>1132683
Pretty sure hating people comes regardless. It's impossible to work retail and not be a misanthropist by the end of it with the kind of retards you have to deal with.
u tried going to the gym bro?
>>1132687
>"If you have a problem, just give up! It's easier to avoid a crucial part of life than try to fix it!"
Pathetic. Tons of people have had issues with social skills and they worked on it instead of being a pathetic loser like you.
Fuck off to >>>/r9k/ with the rest of the future school shooting betas
Act like your silence is silent derision towards your coworkks
>>1133142
>implying it isn't
How to Win Friends and Influence People
Don't get repelled by the name it's the goat book of all time
>>1134676
>suck up to everyone and pretend youre really interested in their bullshit
that books advice is shit.
>>1134678
>I never read the book
You're shit.
>>1132420
I currently have a severe stutter, I can barely get a word out without stuttering, because of this, I have mainly withdrawn into seclusion, how can I develop social skills?
https://www.ted.com/talks/temple_grandin_the_world_needs_all_kinds_of_minds?language=en#t-274606
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IA4tE3_2qmI
>>1132687
>>1132741
http://chadthundercock.tumblr.com/
>>1134758
No no no
I hate this retarded whore with a fiery passion
>>1134793
hate is just a retarded form of Love anon.
Secretly, she and her love of horsecock strike your loins with fiery passion
>>1132741
im 43 an after all these years finally getting ahold of aspie, i wouldnt trade it for the world. still broke and unsuccessful tho
now the panic attacks, i wouldnt wish that on my worst enemy.
>>1134865
Nobody fucking cares you pathetic piece of shit
Off yourself
>>1134721
Everybody stutters one way or the other
So check out my message to you
As a matter of fact
Don't let nothing hold you back
If the scatman can do it
So can you
BADA BWI BA BA BADA BO
BADA BA DA BO
BWI BA BA BA DO
>>1133135
>being this butthurt and triggered
you have low self esteem bruh
>>1132672
The difference between what you perceive as "trained" and "untrained" charisma is that the former has yet to gain enough experience and knowledge to deceive you and become the latter.
Don't think for a second that you cannot learn charisma or manipulation for the people who manage it are perceived as genuine.
>>1132692
>tfw awkward because of an abusive childhood
