Ich habe großen phallus

>>694751126
Doesn't seem like that much of a lifestyle change.

I'd get bored killing zombies by myself and be eaten to experience some feeling for once in my life before i slip away into eternal slumber

>>694751126
probly when trying to help someone unknowingly they're infected.

I play dayz. If i can survive that bug infested Apocalypse, i can survive one in real life as well.

>>694751126
Since I have type 1 diabetes, I would die one way or another once my supply of insulin ran out.

I'm probably going to be patient zero.

>>694751530
3edgy6me

>>694751126
Unless they're sprinters or mutators, the zombie apocalypse would be disappointing to say the least.

My country's soldiers are all fags who couldn't handle a mob of braindead retards.

other people tbh; trigger happy idiots or mistakes. that or the elements.

I'd probably get bit by a family member who turned without me knowing.

>>694753600
This answer is the most accurate.

>>694751126
>flies
>rot
>animals
>weather

Zombies wouldn't last long

Running out of crossbow bolts (I only have like 20 or so).

I run to the store to see if I could steal food like in the movies only to find out everyone else had the same idea and we all had to get out of the store in a line to get away from the zombie in the cold foods isle.

Probably be to lazy to survive.

>>694751126
Im fat as fuck sooooo id b a end of level boss zombie, a fat zombie flesh eating cunt if you will

>>694751126
if theres a virus turning people into zombies most people will get it, no matter how good you're prepared, just face it

>>694751395
Schön für dich. Bitte zeig uns ein Photo

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>>694751126
I would be called zompiephobic and told to stop discriminating. I would die being forced to take part in #ZombieLivesMatter rally.

asthma

>>694751959
same here, also insulin gets bad after some time and it wont be produced anymore so we only have several months to live

>>694756954
i feel ya, asthmabro
>run away from zombiehorde
>find place to hide
>out of breath, lungs won't stop squeaking
>one zombie notices
>finds you
Game over, GG no re

>>694751126
Died trying to bang a sexy ass zombie chick.

>>694751959
>>694757235
I feel y'all faggots pain. Just got diagnosed last year, I'm 20, I'm depressed and suicidal. What do?

I'm a necrophiliac

>>694757916
rape

>>694758040
You hit the metaphorical jackpot

>>694758189
Suggestions?

>>694751126
Let's face it, there's never going to be a zombie apocalypse.

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Convicted felon. Not allowed to possess a firearm.

>>694751126
People can't drive...

>>694757916
Sorry man, got diagnosed with 10 so I can't even remember how it was without diabetes. Best thing is to look for a good doc who is specialized on it and just learn to live with it I guess

access to vehicles that could take armor reinforcement weight, have generator for my welder, a few shotguns, couple pistols, plenty of ammo and bird shot. know of plenty of locations that could have permanent fences put up for farm use.
im able-bodied and cooperative within reason.

i would think starvation or a firefight would be the only risk i would have.

yes, my statements are true and sound

>>694759008
Fuck, thanks anyway dude. My life has pretty much gone down the drain since I got sick. I just pray to any merciful God that might exist that it will get easier over time.

>>694758857
feels bad

>>694751126
Because I have dependents
>chances would improve greatly if i only had myself to worry about

>>694754998
Even if it did happen (literally impossible) in most places it would be over in 2 weeks. So stay inside and starve for a short time If you have to.

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>>694751526
This. If anything the zombies would think I was already dead

>>694759444
>no rifle
You'd die in a fire fight

Considering the fact that I spend most of my time inside and that I live in the middle of nowhere nothing would change. When I finally realize that there are fucking zombies on the street I wouldn't stand a chance because they're too many

Honestly?
Would probably try and care for friends/family and once they all die, if I don't die with them, I'd off myself.
Better dead by my own hand than some undead freak.

I can't die because I am moot

>>694760099
I miss moot.

>>694759968
forgot to mention 308 and ar15. s&w revolver v460. but none of that is a promise i would survive a firefight.

>>694751959
>>694757235
>>694757916
What symptoms did you guys exhibit that made you go and get a test for it? What should i look out for?

I'd become a zombie, but not because I'd been bitten or whatever.
Some tiny drop of zombie blood/saliva would find its way into my system. Someone would carve up a zombie with a chainsaw or blast one with a shotgun whilst I was standing nearby.
Some tiny speck of shite would sail through the air and into my mouth or eye socket or whatever.
I'd be good as zomb.

im already zombie , at least i could eat everyone legally

>>694751126
No wifi

>>694760518
Lethargy, exhaustion, constant dehydration, lack of concentration, loss of appetite and weight

I would turn because I like the challenge of no weapons and only hands and teeth and I shall be the one to end the life's of chuck and arny

As long as you could survive over a year you would most definitely be fine since most of the zombies would be mush heaps due to the weather and standard decay of the human body. If you have food, weapons or anything else stockpiled, and aren't afraid to take down another human trying to take your shit you'll be fine, wait it the fuck out, stay out of major cities, pack a van or a transport with large tanks so easy to keep traveling, or only pack food into a smaller car with greater mpg, either way it would only take about 7 months for the undead a bodies to fully decay, the rest are buffer months....just in case

>>694760518
If you're into your 20's or beyond you'd be unlikely to get type 1 though

lazy fuck and not very social.
I probably wouldn't be able to outrun them forever, but I'd like to think my intellect might carry me for a month or two, but unless I can hook up with a group, I'd be dead pretty quick.

just being realistic.

>>694751126
I would definitely be zombi-fied, maybe not immediately, but pretty quickly.

For some reason or another, a vast majority of my friends said they would flock to me in a circumstance such as zombie-death-the-habbening-redux. It's because I own guns, a few bug out bags, a big truck, 2 dirt bikes, and a sail boat that I keep in a slip at the harbor.

Let me be clear here, I have NO idea what I would do in a zombie apocalypse aside from try to get to my boat and get away from the mainland. There are a lot of uninhabited channel islands off the coast of California which might be a good choice, but I will be the first to tell you that I'm almost positive I wouldn't even make it to my boat in time before zombies ate me.

More realistically, zombies would probably follow the 20 or so friends that showed up at my doorstep, half of those friends would be eaten, killed, or get stuck on the way to the boat, then everyone would die because we have to go through fucking downtown San Diego to get to my dock slip.

Yeah, everyone would be zombie noms.

>>694751959
similar.
high blood pressure.
If I don't have my meds I'll blow a pipe in my head and drop dead.

>>694753600
same here, tbh. depends on how the virus spreads... if it's gaseous, we're all fucked

>>694756203
kek

>>694751126
im fat and would probably try and fuck a zombie because im a virgin fag

>>694761862
if it's resident evil/biohazard style, super fucked.

dawn/day/night of the dead style, probably wouldn't spread very quickly, and I'd think we've all had enough zombie movie experience to identify that shit and avoid zombies well enough or just kill them all because they're fucking retarded.

Calypso style, would sort of peter out after a while, causing minimal damage.

>>694761347
what if their body is alive, while just the brain that is being affected by the virus?

Why are people talking about standard decay of a body in a zombie scenario? If the dead can reanimate and for some reason want to eat the flesh of the living. What makes you think they would rot, or fall over because of the cold?

I'd probably hide in a dark corner or somewhere private to fap. Id be right in the middle of an orgasm and chomp, op zombie bites my cock off. blood and cum spurting everywhere. now im a dickless zombie.

>>694762413
if the zombies are slow-moving and don't have efficient way to transmit the virus, they'd be very easy to get rid of

Confidence vs consequence, it'd be alot harder to muster the instinctual fight response in a real life scenario rather than envisioning your solution. That's what'd get 99% of the population killed, THINKING rather than acting upon their instincts.