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Waifu claiming thread. Previous: >>694051020 Rules: >Claim
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The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
You are currently reading a thread in /b/ - Random

Thread replies: 122
Thread images: 107
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Waifu claiming thread.

Previous:
>>694051020

Rules:
>Claim your Waifu/Husbando
>No Claiming Waifus/Husbandos that have already been claimed
>Only one claim per anon
>No stealing (unless trips or more)
>No oversexualised content
>No RP/ERP of any kind (maybe some on occasion)
>Discussion is welcomed
>Insults must be original
>If you're posting images you're not lurking
>3D is almost always trash
>Joining means a reserved place in hell
>Most importantly, have fun!

Rory-sama claimed.
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I will grant you one wish.
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bump
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And here I thought a waifu thread would actually die
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>>694057192
I'd like better internet

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
>>
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>>694059985
See >>694060109
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Wasup?
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>>694060427
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
>>
>>694056994
And the ugly people losers has to hurt the popular people the ugly way to be better then the popular people or everybody and plus smell like poop like beyonce and is ugly and smell like shit like beyonce and is ugly
>>
>>694060762
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
>>
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Miho claimed
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>>694061516
Wrong bread faggot >>694056915
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>>694056994
ay
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claimed

Still here

>>694062935
I love this pic
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Claiming Best waifu.
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>>694063853
>lil' smug
Simple! For my entertainment~
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Claim
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How the hell was this still up
Holy balls
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I was already In this thread and now im back the fuck
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>>694063637
>>Agressive mizore
I like this

>>694063725
>

>>694063884
Eating chicken and listening to creepy mcdonalds stories
>>
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>>694064155
>To get Makoto lewd for me~
>>
>>694064176
Noticed will game after food wars

>>694064196
People still post here lmao dude
>>
>>694064274
Mr. Nightmare? Be busta? Lazy masquerade?
>>
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I've seen this copypasta at least 52 times before, I know I counted every single one, I have a photographic memory. I see it pasted everywhere by low life unoriginal fucking shit cunts such as yourself. And you know what, it isn't funny. I didn't even giggle. I didn't even smile a little bit. NOT EVEN A FUCKING LITTLE BIT. You could have got a psychologist to analyse my facial expressions and body language and they'd come up with fucking nothing. I am dead inside when I read your memes, and I have to listen to Evanescence to wake me up inside again. I had absolutely no emotion at the bottom of my soul, a part from disgust. I hate this meme bullshit, more than I hate that shitty doge meme. You're probably like "doge meme is so funny le wow xDDD". Fucking shitty meme copying faggot plebeian. How do you live with yourself? Being so mentally deficient that you are physically incapable of an single original thought, that you have to copy paste shitty internet memes? How sad. How pathetic. Why don't you kill yourself? If I were you, I'd honestly kill myself right now. Memes are an art. Memes take effort and artistic integrity to create, and you think you can just spam that stupid shit and pass it as a 'meme'. You don't know what MEMEING is. Every meme I've created is original, and actually funny, you don't know anything about harvesting memes. You're honestly a fucking deadset idiot, ruining the meme community for you own pathetic self indulgences. You seriously think this copypasta is funny? LOL you're a deadset fucking mentally deficient cunt.
>>
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>>694064274
>running out of 1.5 lewds
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>>694064467
New season or first
Food Wars is some good shit
>>694064274
Fried chicken right
I just had some shitty tacos and im about to play some vidya
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>>694064090
Barry

>>694064155
Oh you~
Don't tease her too hard okay?~
>

>>694064199
Saved

>>694064463
Need a bit of help with the makoto lewds I see
>>
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Does you're waifu have a theme and is it cute?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ei84Tk123II
>>
>>694064784
The new one. I forgot how much I love alice
>>
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franku claimed
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>>694064510
>Nightmare
That would be kurumi

>>694064731
>Same

>>694064784
Grilled
Grinding on runescape
>>
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>>694064731
Full lewd
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>>694064213
Are you saying that we went full circle and just got ourselves stuck inside one of yesterday's threads?
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>>694064463
And that too
Our goals are one in the same! Assist me in my quest~

>>694064827
I have her shipmate's consent~
>>
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>>694064827
I'm just very...particular, tonight.
>I'm a bit cut up, so of course, agressive mizore
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>>694064731
Are we posting RWBY lewds?
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claimed
>>
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>>694064922
Ya the new season is gonna be pretty fucking good
>>694064960
Runescape 2 or 3
Please dont dissapoint me now
>>
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Yo
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playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.

Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I was scouted by the Mets, I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after school, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.

I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. I bat 400.

My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me. I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations with the CIA.

I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid.

On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prize-winning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan.

But I have yet gone to college
>>
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>>694065418
Osrs (Runescape 2)
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Hyouka Fuwa
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>>694064872
She doesn't. She has this tribute/AMV though
https://youtu.be/pm-VlUkBEUc

>>694065173
I see~

>>694065219
Drinking tonight?

>>694065418
I'd be done by now if my signal wasn't so shit. It's stopping every 5 seconds!

>>694065419
Sup
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Claiming best girlie!
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shaman claimed
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>>694064872
https://youtu.be/L0a0O2dqrJ0
>>694064960
>
>>694065016
Not going 2lewd
>>
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>>694065661
I wish, no I literally mean cut up, road rash.
>Pain makes me aggressive.
>>
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>>694065718
Ayy the real dr pepper!

>>694065826
I'll snipe you with something alright~
>>
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best wifu claimed boys you can go home now.
>>
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>>694065661
Hmhm

>>694065718
You...
<3
>>
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>>694065661
Was sleep.
Now not sleep.
You know, the usual
>>
>>694065590
Oh shit nigga launching that right now
1v1 me desert arena
>>694065661
I know them feels
I got shit internet in general
>>694065939
Your a right cheeky cunt aint ya love
>>
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claimed

what's up
>>
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>>694066064
Yes yes, Gasai. It is me. Was there a fake earlier or something?
How goes it?
>>
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I'm sorry to everyone I was speaking to a couple threads ago. Had to attend something. Now I'll 'try' to sleep to finish it in the morning. Goodnight.
>>
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>>694066270
I'm starting to realize this may not be OK and that I shouldn't be this sexual.
>>
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>>694066200
Boat legs...
<3
>>
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bustin out the good shit kids
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>>694066671
Are you the anon who gave me the SFM Ryuko lewd?
>>
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>>694066064
>>
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When I was 12 I had my first sexual experience. At the time, I lived in a little suburb outside of Cleveland and anyway, the girl next door and I were really good friends. Our parents were both gone for the day and she was over playing Transformers with me. So anyway, we kinda got.. Bored I guess? And we started playing truth or dare, which turned into 'you show me yours, I'll show you mine". So anyway there I Was, 12 years old, heart pounding, blood rushing in my ears, and the chick (who was a year older than me actually) takes off her panties and hikes her little skirt up. So What did I do, you ask? I whistled for a cab, and when it came near, the license plate said "fresh" and there were dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare, but I thought "naw forget it, yo home to bel-air!" I pulled up to the house about seven or eight and I yelled to the cabbie "yo homes smell ya later!" Looked at my kingdom, I was finally there. To settle my throne as the prince of bel-air.
>>
>>694066831
pardon me? i dont speak weebe
>>
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>>694056994
DADDY ARCADE CLAIMED
>>
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>>694066270
But Im doing clue
Rsn: Homu Akemi

>>694066297
Yeah, thought it was you til anon pointed out theres something you say to stand you out

>>694066445
Good night comrade!

>>694066847
Heheheh can't help it~
>>
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Don't mind me, just claiming GOAT waifu
>>
>>694066671
Nooooooooooo
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>>694067205
found another one!
>>
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>>694064827
Something is better than nothing I suppose. Maybe this is one of those times where time is the only healer.

I know right? Feels great to want to get out there and do something.

>>694065173
That means my expectations are set higher, Boss. It's gonna be tough, maybe even tougher than Cipher.

It's not something I'd put on my phone but it's worth a bookmark. Kek, that's the only one I had sadly.

>>694064872
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NC3iYURvhU4

>>694066296
Hey Emi, how's the guitar stuff going?
>>
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>>694067102
I posted earlier, but left right after for something. Dunno how long ago that was though
>>
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>>694067273
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>>694067109
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>>694067393
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>>694066559
You like' em~?
What's up Dr.Pepper?

>>694067327
I wouldn't had given you this if I wasn't confident in your abilities!

I have nothing in a phone kek
>>
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>>694067393
b0ss
>>
Claimin Kurumi-chan.
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>>694067133
She's looking dead as shit bruh
>>
>>694067327
it's going alright, need to get new strings. I also need to get guitar pro for the tabs cause I couldnt be fucked learning notes.

How about you, what's up?
>>
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>>694067636
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>>694067923
fight me b0ss
>>
>>694065939
Oh shit dude. You good?

>>694066200
Good lil ship ^_^

>>694066260
Sleep, wake up, and do stuff, go back to sleep and repeat. Got any plans?

>>694066270
;_;

>>694066296
Watching good wars. You?

>>694067327
I'm confused. We talking about cosplays?

You got this
https://youtu.be/qapsrR8zIJM
>dude doing one arm pull up in wheel chair. Holy shit
>>
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>>694067332
I'm sorry my tool is too big!

>>694067390
Ah gotcha
>>
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>>694067599
Legs are great my nigga.
Not much, same ol' same ol'. You?
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>>694068050
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>>694068335
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Oh boy /b/ I sure did it this time

I am in so much shit here it's not even funny. Every once in a while I babysit my niece and cousin for some extra money, said niece is 7 and the cousin is 5. I was sitting there and I found one of my uncles Penthouse magazines and started flipping trough the pages, secretly so the kids wouldn't see it. I was sitting comfortably when suddenly I flip open a page to THE HOTTEST GIRL I EVER SEEN. So I am sitting there checking her out when suddenly

my niece spills apple juice all over my pants. I almost shout out god dammit but I managed to hold that shit in when my niece says as I am standing up: "You can put your trousers in the washing machine I know how it works!" So I unbutton my pants and take them off, forgetting that recently I lost a lot of weight (22 pounds) and thus my underwear falls down on the floor. Exposing the boner the Penthouse pet just gave me. And just as my niece points at my my shlong saying: "Why is it all hard like that?" My uncle and aunt walk in the room because they forgot their wallet.

To make a long story short I was kicked out of the house, my uncle slapping me on the head (hard) shouting I'm a pervert, which I am not, and my aunt shouting they'd call the police on me and I was never to come to their house again.

What the fuck do I do now?!
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>>694068222
Nah, was sleep for like 3 hours, now schedule's all fucked
It's also 1:30am
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>>694068222
Just sitting here drinking. Might watch some Death Parade or play some cs:go. How's good wars? never heard of it
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>>694068222
Beside the aggression.
I'm fine.
>God damn i want to go do some stupid shit.
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>>694068603
>casual
FUCKING NORMIE GET OFF MY B :^)
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>>694068424
>>
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>>694068316
Its not too big, you just have no control
>>
Who the fuck is The Claw?
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>>694068727
Never )'3')
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>>694065161
Dude what did you get at the con?
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>>694068755
With how lewd you are, I cannot
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b0ss please
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>>694066984
Heyo, Arcade.

Good taste.
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>>694064827
>>694065173
>>694065219
I stopped for food.
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>>694068952
(Borrowing Yuno)
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>>694068820
that face says "lets do anal"
>>
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The Anime Re:zero is dope as fuck

Im playing paragon and watching this shit.
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>>694069136
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>>694069122
*borrows shaman*
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>>694068222
Eheh~

>>694068319
That they are
I'm salty, lost a long game of Hearts of Iron 4 ;-;

>>694069016
I didn't expect you to let ME know
Maybe you like me after all~
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>>694069016
I'll give you something to eat!~
>You may not be able to swallow it all.
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>>694068547
You done fucked your circadian cycle then? I also see you're east coast

>>694068603
Food wars is great. Story wise, characters, and the creator did his research on everything there is to cooking

>>694068705
Stick your dicky in a pitcher plant :^)
>please don't
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>>694067599
Maybe you're right, Boss. I'll give it another shot.

You don't put any music on there?

>>694067721
How much will all of that cost? Nevertheless good luck with it. Not much at the moment, spending the night sitting here playing music as usual. Had a pretty active day so I'm beat.

>>694068222
Kek, I was talking about your sickness. How'd you get cosplay?

I've actually seen this before. It's fucking amazing how he can pull that off. It's possible for everyone but it's also possible to give up.

>>694069016
I'm trying to remember a story but all we did was fuck around and play Kingdom of Hearts.
>>
>>694069016
Was it good food?

>>694069288
Hehe~
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>>694068945
Funny thing is, Rory isnt the lewdest in the anime.
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>>694069288
Let you know what?!

>>694069317
Is it shepards pie? Because I could go for some shepards pie.
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>>694069122
stay back m80!
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>>694069233
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>>694069518
I can make that.
>But what I'm thinking is more meaty
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>>694069518
You could always eat some spoodr
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>>694069326
I work nights, just not on consecutive days, so it's always fucked.
Also ye, east coast
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>>694069383
Good

Nope, if I go for a walk I like to listen to noting
If I'm bored I just browse in the internet~

>>694069400
What's your image supposed to be?

>>694069518
I mean, I'm a rape bote to you, so why would you even attempt to communicate with me~?
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>>694069885
Thread replies: 122
Thread images: 107

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