just think of getting murderes or drowned in sement or some hoible shit when they ask the control questions. then the lying become inconclusive

>>693290889
There's the whole nail in your sock thing

When they ask "is OP a fag?"

Imagine they are saying "is OP a success in life?"
Then when you answer "no" it will appear as if you're telling the truth

>>693291182
Nah probably a myth

>>693290889
The interview while they are doing the poly is what they are actually looking for. A good tech will spot lying most of the time without even checking the poly.

Just be honest.

If they are giving you a poly they are probably interviewing friends and family - again, just be honest.

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>>693290889
>OP applies for federal government job
>"lol I'm too good for /b/ now"
>quits /b/
>goes along to job interview
>sits down for polygraph test
>first question tester asks
>"are you a faggot?"
>OP returns to /b/

>>693291208
Underrated

You can beat them by being sociopath level calm. They aren't perfect and they no longer even hold up in court as evidence

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>>693291396
Kek

>>693291544
They never held up in court as they are unscientifically proven to work. Yet jobs still use it, even the fucking FBI and Cia and shit use it during the hiring process when it is proven inaccurate.

>>693291544
Theyve never been admissible.

dumbass

>>693290889
>How do I beat it?
By believing everything you say

>>693291658
Why do you even care? It's not as if you're ever gonna get a job that important.

>>693291658
>unscientifically proven to work
you sound like a real expert

lol

dumbass

If you think something in your mind is true like you ate an orange for lunch and its true and say yes to the question they ask you'll beat it

>>693291897
How do I do that?

>>693291544
And how do I do that? I'll be pretty nervous as fuck. Any drugs to take to calm me down and slow heart beat? Ecstacy?

Do they drug test before/after?

This nigga does not have a government job lined up, he's probably being questioned by police for stalking some chick.

>>693291944
Because, it's really silly you fucking fuck.

>>693292202
If they ask if you are a troll - answer yes. Since you are.

2/10

dumbass.

Drink alcohol before to go to the interview, not so much, but don't be a pussy, just a little tipsy.

You can only beat it if you're a cold motherfucker. Or subconsciously freak the fuck out the entire time and bury the lie.

>>693292261
Lol if it was really the police, I wouldn't give a fuck and would even do it since it can't be used as evidence. It's for a job, which is why I'm really worried. I'm not the most perfect person.

take one benzodiazepine in the morning to help with anxiety. Take a day to test it out beforehand to see if you might need 2.
Take amitriptyline about 30 minutes before the test to help with sweating

>>693292202
This nigga applying for a federal job and is thinking of taking drugs TOP KEK you must be a chill dude to hand with

>>693292261
this.

OP is a faggot.

>>693292301
Fuck off

>>693292309
M8... Pretty sure that'll just male everything 100% worse lol.

>>693292388
It's just a scare tactic bruh, just go in calm and confident

>>693292426
Take LSD and then take this advice.

dumbass.

>>693292516
Yes this is what I've always heart. It's just an intimidat tool. Just wanted other people's input.

>>693292470
Thanks for proving my assertion.

dumbass.

just pretend everything you're saying is a lie

>>693292426
You reminded me, I have a Benz drug, propranolol. I might take that.

>>693292583
Police cant give a poly without your consent.

dumbass.

>>693291333
This and 50% of the interview is done when they are hooking you up to the machine. The idle chit chat the interviewer makes is not idle. People feel safe when the machine is not on so they inadvertently confess to dumb shit. Once you are hooked up it's a distraction to make it harder to keep a bullshit story straight.

>>693292682
This is a pre interview process. Dumbass.

>>693292583
Heard* intimidation*

>>693292583
Just act like you've got nothing to hide, and deny anything incriminating, claim you're nervous because really want job/first polygraph etc

>>693290889
put a small tack in your shoe and press your toe on it when you answer every question, keep your butthole clenched at all times once you're hooked up.

>>693290889
>OK /b/ I'm applying for a position (undisclosed) for the federal government after I graduate college next semester

KYS

>polygraph testing pseudoscience bullshit that is only 70% accurate.

Not even that accurate.

>How do I beat it?

Think of sex and tense your muscles during the control questions (name age etc.). That way you screw up the base line.

>>693292722
Can you give me more info? Like the tester has me connected, but he is small talking me the whole time in hopes of getting me to admit something?

>>693292905
Yeah that was what I was going to do

>>693292818
Cant even spell words, yet expect to fool a poly.

I was responding to you taking a police poly, since we all know you are making the part up about "a job".

You are such a poor liar, you are screwed.

dumbass.

>>693292938
So I have to be "nervous" during the first questions (name etc etc) to raise the base line, and then every question after that would be below? Wouldn't that be suspicious?

>>693291224
It's not a myth but a nail might make it difficult to walk normally, it could also trip a metal detector, and it would be difficult to explain why you have a nail in your sock if they search you for weapons.

>>693293030
Nice b8, but I'm not taking it lol. First of all its a typo, second Yeah I know dumbass, which is why I said I wouldn't take it.

>>693290889
you have to lie during the baseline test (calibration), that is all.

the whole test is then worthless!

>>693293159
Why? You don't usually have a nail in your sock? I hate when I find a nail in my sock. Happens like twice a week.

>>693293232
Refer to
>>693293117


Also how can I lie about my name? Lol

>>693290889
They ask you before hand all the questions. Just be honest and they will record the answers. Then they will strap you up and ask those same questions again, with the added "other than we previously discussed" portion. It is more about how much do you give upfront than if your lying or not. So just be upfront in teh initial interview.

>>693292942
It begins before he has you connected. Trying to get you to ask what ifs. Seeing if you are trying to get tips to "beat the test". The machine's results are not what matters, its the interviewers statement that counts.

>>693290889
You can beat them by taking 5mg of ambien and a bunch of caffeine. Watch ISIS beheading videos and on the control questions think about the screaming and blood to spike your response.
>sauce - beat 2 of them.
On the 2nd test we didn't do the 3rd run of questions because I was so flat.

>>693292438
That reminds me of a guy I shared an apartment in university. He used to work at an oil refinery during the summer. They did drug testing, so every spring he would lay off the weed and various other drugs for two months so that he would pass the test. After he had passed the test he would smoke again. Lesson: If you do drug testing, also test randomly and unannounced.

>>693293407
So basically keep consistent with answers

>>693292498
No, I'm an expert and this just make you feel like everything matter a shit so all the answer have the same feeling charge.

>>693293493
Hmm I see thanks, not planning to fall for his fishy tactics.

>>693293602
Kek... A bunch of law school students smoke weed, everyone is two faced

>>693293568
Thanks man appreciate the response. Looking at all my options now.

>>693293568
Also, if you're going in to a decently experienced tester they will try and establish a "friendship" with you before the test. They'll be jovial and friendly, and ask about your day. This is to establish a connection that would make you feel more guilty about lying. Remember he is the enemy. His job is to fuck with you. Be adversarial mentally, but not out loud.
The other tactic is to tell you how many of these they did, how accurate they are and blah blah blah. They'll intimidate you in to thinking it's unbeatable. That's a lie. They are beatable.

>>693290889
dear op, the polygraph doesn't test anything but your willingness to follow orders blindly.
Say no and you get a good job. Say yes and you will be a janitor in Abu Graib.

>>693294070
I see... Trying to establish psychological warfare into me. Again, I'll be wary of thier fishy tactics. Thanks for pointing this out. I would've been a dumbass and just went along with his "kindness".

>>693294031
Try and keep in mind there are:
Control questions: your name, you DOB, etc. Obvious truths
Baseline questions: stuff you'd maybe white lie about or everyone would be 50/50 like "would you ever steal" try and keep your response to these low. I use a mantra or focus on a clock noise or my pulse.
Test questions: these are the meat questions. These are the ones you want to focus on relaxing.

>>693294496
If you're going to use the ISIS example you'd want to do it on the control questions, the absolute truths, name, DOB, etc

>>693294496
Thanks man. Can you give me examples of some test questions? Is this where I should "relax" the most?

>>693294496
>>693294897
So basically

Control: relax

Baseline: relax ever more

Test: be the most fucking relaxed you can be?

>>693291396
Heh

>>693294977
Even*

>>693294977
Also of course I can tell what the control questions are... But how would I differentiate between which are base and test questions? Sorry for too many questions

>>693294897
You ultimately want your response to the baseline questions higher than the test questions.
So test questions would involve things established in the preinterview. You ever done drugs, ever bought a weapon illegally, ever communicated with radical fundamentals, ever posted anything racist etc

>>693294977
Control - think isis
Baseline - just answer
Test - focus on relaxing, distract yourself

>>693295120
Baseline are things like "would you steal" well in certain situations you might. "would you lie to your wife" No... But maybe... Those are the baselines, to gauge your lie or doubt response.

Test is "would you rape a 9 year old" there is no situation where that'd be OK.

Stay calm don't sweat that's how murderers pass

>>693295634
Its more than that. If you're not a sociopath, which some murderers are, you have to know and really believe they can be beat. AND THEY CAN BE. I'VE BEATEN THEM.

>>693295319
>>693295498
Thanks man... I'll be ready for this shit. I'm pumped.

>>693295634
Well murderes/sociopaths show no empathy to thier victims. They are basically cold hearted which is how they pass. Your heart may be beating like crazy after you've murdered someone with a knife and panicking on how to hide the body and clean the blood and shit.

A sociopath who did the same thing would just smile and have a stable heartbeat though the whole thing.

>>693291208
Kek

>>693295811
If you can get pharmaceutical assistance you'll be in even better shape. Ambien is a silver bullet but barring that blood pressure and heartbeat controllers like beta blockers are a huge help.
A few hours before the test apply antiperspirant to your hands, ALL OF THE SKIN BELOW THE WRIST. Let it soak in but wash it off before you get there. The antiperspirant will have soaked in by then. They will ask you to wash your hands, just dont be vigorous

>>693290889
forget about the nail in your sock bullshit and or any other faggotry you read on here..

the best thing to do is this.. see a doctor well in advance, you can do it through 2 methods, one is the over the counter non drug tested method, use maypop aka passionflower and benydryl to calm the fuck down. use both one is a MAOI inhibitor and will slow your anxiety, the benydryl will help manage a steady blood pressure and pulse.. those are both important factors on the test.. they Rx way is to explain to a doctor that you have a family history of heart disease and high blood pressure, say your dad and all of your grand fathers died from heart attacks.. explain that you have a fear of heights and your job sits you at a high office window with your anxiety to the max.. drink alot of coffee before the appointment, run a fucking mile, do what you gotta do to get your blood pressure through the fucking roof anon.. your goal is to get benzos and bp meds.. neither are really strictly controlled and most docs will see you in a panic thinking its your heart rate and try to calm you down before going to a psych... tldr, get xanax and viagra faggot

>>693296129
This is probably stupid but never heard of ambien... Is it legal? Where to get?

As for beta blockers... I have propranolol. It slows my heart beat and make me less nervous for 30 mins.

And thanks about the anti sweat thing.


Have you ever done a polygraph yourself? How long was it? Do they drug test before or after? Thanks

>>693296357
Ambien is a prescription sleep medication, it's very common but a prescription.
>>693296245
Is right about zanax or anything anti anxiety as well.

>>693296245
Yeah m8 I have beta blockers which I plan to use. I'll also look into the caffeine thing. I don't wanna drug myself too much or I think it'll just make me high. I once took a lot of propranolol by accident and I was really really fucking relaxed and sleepy

>>693296357
I'm the guy that beat 2. They can test for benzo's but not heart medicine or ambien. Some do a breathalyzer before so booze is a no-no.

>>693296505
If it's common, I'll find it. Just don't want to fall asleep on the machine lmao.

>>693290889
Clench your asshole during the control part of the test, like during anynoart of the test you are not lying on, and then on a part you have to lie on, unclench

>>693296691
So are beta blockers good or are you not sure? Propranolol is "heart medicine" and is a beta blocker. If they do test for it, I'll def just go for ambien.

>>693296779
Hmm this clenching of the asshole tactic keeps coming up, I'll take a look into it.

The whole point is to see if you admit to things they already know about you. If you don't think the feds have everything on you by that point in the process, you're literally retarded. If you lie to them, you're even more retarded.

So you're joining border patrol huh? Wanna bust some beaners? The whole point of the test is to see if you'll crack like an egg. Just stick to your stories about how you never did cocaine and pleasured your anus, faggot

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>>693290889
clench your sphincter before each question. This actually works too

>>693296245
I had an FBI interview years ago and I had to lie about previous drug use. I did alot of research for it at the time, everything went well, I got the job. This is exactly what I did. I didn't worry about the sweat part, i just told them i was nervous because I never did a test like this before and the job meant alot. You're right, you dont want to over do it, you want to have some normal red flags, like sweating and being a little anxious, but the trick is to be consistent, even when you are telling the truth. My name is, holy fuck im taking a polygraph Anonymous.. Good luck /bro

>>693292151
The creative part of your brain will still be firing, you will deep down know you are being deceptive, heart rate will pick up, breath rate/depth will change, a skilled tester will pick up on this no problem.

>>693297732
This person is talking some psuedo science left brain shit.. They dont have you hooked up to any brainwave monitoring at all. They are trained to look for visual cues, but remember if you are anxious at the beginning of the test stay that way for the entire test. Dont get comfortable halfway through thinking you passed, you dont pass until they call you with a start date.

>>693294442
>Trying to establish psycholigcal warfare into me
Are you retarded?

Not admissible in court but still effective. They will likely ask you some very personal shit like have you ever watched CP how many time a day do you masturbation do you watch porn have you ever cheated, drugs, etc.
Basically only way to beat it is if you're trained on beating it or if you're a psychopath.
Basically all fbi/Cia agents are either captain America and have done nothing wrong in their life or psychopaths.

>>693296917
No. They put a pad under your ass to catch this

>>693298132
Learn to read dipshit.
When you are being deceptive you use different areas of the brain to recalling facts, smells, or sounds. You ALWAYS have a change in pulse and respiration rate when you do this (exactly what they test). Sometimes it can be small but thats why they generally ask the same questions over and over to reduce error and take that 70% to a much, much greater figure. At no point did I talk about brainwave monitoring, my point is that thinking "today I ate an orange" Will absolutely not work in any way shape or form if you know you are being deceptive. It will light up like a Christmas tree in terms of pulse and respiration rate.
To effectively beat a trained poly tester you either need serious mental and physical training and knowledge or to honestly believe what you are saying. Next time read my response and understand it before talking a load of shit.
The best bet is to be honest for small stuff and if it's major and horrible stuff, refuse to answer and end the test.
You are not going to beat a poly run by trained professionals with any reliability, trying to will make you look far worse to admitting minor flaws.

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>>693291396
Kek

>>693299741
Lies are caught on comparison to truths. Big response, against minimal response = lie. If you have a big response to truths and a large response to lies then they look equal, which means you're telling the truth.

>>693292654
propranolol is not benzo, its a beta-blocker, which in this case it might work even better than any benzo

>>693300286
Totally useless information unless you can perfectly match your heart rate/bp/respiration rate/depth while lying to when telling the truth.
Sure thats how it works, OP still doesn't have a shot in hell matching his truthful responses to lies.

>>693299741
Hey I know that you read alot online and all Im proud of you, my FBI interviews consist of agents and NRC agents for Nuclear Power. The testing usually takes about 3 hours and they ask the most unrelated questions over and over again. I am saying from experience, that with 3 people in the room, a psychologist, an FBI agent and a NRC agent, that being consistent and nervous is the key. Taking the meds that are non disqualifying medications help tremendously. They are not looking to hook you up to brainwave scanners, ekg machines or anything like that. They will ask questions like, what color are your feces, over and over again. Answering the question with a "brown" statement is an absolute red flag. I know this because one of my candidates got fucking flagged on this question alone as a lie. Speaking from experience not discovery channel you faggot fucktard.

>>693301884
But feces is really brown....??

>>693302434
The question is a series of questions. The first time they ask it is "when you go to the bathroom do you look in the toilet when you are done?" Then they ask 20 minutes later after another set of questions, "when you have a bowel movement do you check to see the color and consistency for any health indicators or illness?" Then the third time they ask they simply put, "what color are your feces?" They ask questions that are usually 4 fold. So another example would be, "Do you believe in God?" Then, "Do you follow a religion?" then "Do you believe in an afterlife?" The questions have nothing to do with you and everything to do with your integrity. They want to know if you are giving answer you think they want to hear, if so why, or if you are a weirdo that plays with their shit, looks at it because of OCD or you think that Allah Snackbaring at the plant will get you some virgins.. Their is a baseline for these questions. They want someone between captain america and a psycho, but if you are lying they wont be able to put you in that checkbox and fail you out. They dont care, the more they fail, the more strict they seem.

>>693303135
My candidate simply answered "no" to the first 2 questions and answered the common sense answer for "brown" the 3rd time. We had to get him a psych eval in order to get him a badge. Thats the only reason I know about that stupid ass question, because my guy failed for it.

>>693301884
Sorry you are lying on the internet to sound cool.
Other than that you seem to think I have said they use some "brainwave scanners", I never said that. I mentioned the physiological responses that occur when you lie. These occur due to what happens in your brain when you lie and this causes external physical changes easily picked up on by the equipment they do use.
Nothing you have said is particularly helpful for getting away with lies or deception during the test and is all just pseudo bullshit that while it might be true is also very irrelevant.
Telling the OP to be "consistent and nervous" is retarded. He has no control over physical changes in respiration or heart rate.
Trying to alter these during a test is also going to be very obvious and cause him to fail the moment he starts to try. Unless you have total control over your heart and respiration rate you will fail at any attempt of deception.
Being "consistent" Is almost impossible when you are lying.

>>693291182
What are you talking about?

>>693290889
It's easy dumbass, just don't lie

>>693304024
Im not lying on the internet to sound cool, I am simply stating my experience to help (op) get their shit together. Taking any CNS depressant will help them remain calm during the exam. Stating that they will be asked the same question a variety of ways is also helpful going into the exam. Im sorry you feel like my experience isnt relevant to yours, however, my NCRB aka nuclear medicine experience before working in a high security nuclear power plant doing these exams multiple times a year give me a little bit more experience than what you might have. I agree some of it does seem lie psuedo science, there isn't an exact measurement to tell if someone is telling a lie or not. But like I said, in my experience, staying consistent, taking medications that help your blood pressure and anxiety stay somewhere in a normal range will help prevent you from throwing up red flags while you are taking the exam. Normal bp 120/80 pulse in the 75 range and spo2 at 98, rpm at 18 is what we consider normal. Again, im sorry if you dont think that will help, but in my experience, someone that doesnt shit their fucking pants and stays normal during the exam has no problems.

>>693304890
Not the same guy but if you put a thumb tack in your shoe and press on it it will deliver pain throughout your body and mess up you physiological readings that the instrument is recording. So they won't know if it's accurate or not but they watch for it and they have a bunch of other techniques they use. I was hooked up to one for a fee hours for an interview as well. Above all like the other anon said it's not used in court because it isn't accurate at all so don't worry about it. Plus they check your Internet history if you look up ways to beat it.