do u succ

In that situation, something pertaining to a felonious criminal recored perhaps?

>>692966176
hey there sugar titts

you're at a bar, fuck face. ask her if she wants a drink.

>>692966176
a liner coke usually does it

>>692966332
gold

tell her all about your dealings on /b. that'll turn her on big time. femanon here.

>>692966176
Ask if she sucks black cock.

>>692966176
do you like cute pink baboon asses?

just start off by sincerely showing your interest. 'hey cutie' or shit like that, then smalltalk. ask about her day, how she doin, if she's alone etc, take it from a femanon

>>692966176

My dads a nigger

Coke or meth?

>>692966176

Ey shawtee, wat yo frunt name is?

>>692966753
fuck you cumdumpster

>>692966176
you let the girl approach you and force her to break the ice with you, immediately giving you the upper hand.

File: 2016-07-02 10.07.35.jpg (302 KB, 1600x1200) Image search: [Google]

302 KB, 1600x1200

>>692966753
Timestamp or not femanon

OP Here: Fun fact, the girl in the plaid shirt dated this jewish guy at my school that I hated. Now she has a black bf.

File: virgin_mary.png (1 MB, 709x900) Image search: [Google]

1 MB, 709x900

>>692966176
>chat-up lines

FFS just smile and say hello.

>>692966630
hi there, are you fat?

File: hqdefault.jpg (20 KB, 480x360) Image search: [Google]

20 KB, 480x360

>>692966176
"Good morrow, my good lady. *tips fedora* How art thou upon this fine eve? Might I perchance purchase your person a beverage of the alcoholic variety? I would be most gracious if you would do my person this honour. *bows before her* What might thy name be?"

>>692966938
>Once you go Jew you go Black.

>>692966984
I actually wrote this girl a love letter in Old English my freshman year of hs. She didn't respond.

>>692966924
your show sucks and your a dumb fucking idiot and no one wanted to see ur peenis in ur movie either. go get a real job at 711.

>>692966176
Start off with "where yo man at?" Then, no matter what she says, say "why he let yo fine ass out like dis?" Then, whatever she says you look at her and smile and say "God damn girl"
after that you're in

>>692966176
want sum fuk?

nice tits bitch. lets fuck

come to her and whisper gently in her ear "i give free clamidia"

File: 1277906917717.jpg (27 KB, 451x339) Image search: [Google]

27 KB, 451x339

>>692967160

>>692966176
"hey did you know the word 'fist' can also be a verb?"

What u jews think of this one: "I heard you were looking for a stud. I've got the std's and all I need is u."

File: IMG-20160704-WA0002.jpg.jpg (109 KB, 1600x900) Image search: [Google]

109 KB, 1600x900

>>692966924
you said timestamp

>>692966978
Holy shit hahaha

>>692967695
Those look like jew hands

>>692967615
bloodhound gang?

>>692967696
glad to make you laugh, now are you?

>>692967763
i'm the whitest thing i know

https://youtu.be/Q7b8G4PLH8M

bitch from my school

me and my squald outside would love to hang out with you

>>692967795
oh yeah

>>692966176
u wan sum fuk

>>692967695
still i cannot understand why women would willingly take time out of their lives to come to 4chan, b of all boards and then tell everyone they have a vagina. i always thought only men could be so useless.

anyways, tits or gtfo

>>692968072
Lol that's my favorite song by them. Their new album is kinda dissapointing.

File: tits or gtfo theory.png (458 KB, 1338x275) Image search: [Google]

458 KB, 1338x275

>>692967695

>>692966176
Niggers tongue my anus

>>692968136
>>692968234
meh only reason it was stated was because guy was asking for advice w chicks

>>692966630
Tits or gtfo

>>692968234
Cringe

>>692967695
>dat Windows

>>692967763
Lol. What do Jew hands look like?

>>692968559
see this
>>692963472
it's 7

>>692968633
Lol looked more like 98

>>692968633
checked

You mean its the windows 98 skin in windows 7?

>>692966176
i dint know what you look like in every day life but you look really pretty right now.
>thanks ya sex animal
Youre welcome, i'm anon and i just wanted to say hi
>hi anon, i'm femanon
>femanon, i like that name reminds me of the slut i raped and murdered couple years back. Anyway can i get your number? i wanna catch you sometime your free and get to know you.
>sure it 1800 55 1800
Thanks bitch, we gon fuck.

"I have coke and money" would probably work for the particular scenario in pic.

>>692966176
i dint know what you look like in every day life but you look really pretty right now.
>thanks ya sex animal
Youre welcome, i'm anon and i just wanted to say hi
>hi anon, i'm femanon
>femanon, i like that name reminds me of the slut i raped and murdered couple years back. Anyway can i get your number? i wanna catch you sometime your free and get to know you.
>sure it 1800 55 1800
Thanks bitch, we gon fuck.
Okay i gotta go now, rape ya later!

>>692967695
can i fuck u right in the pussy?

>>692966176
i dint know what you look like in every day life but you look really pretty right now.
>thanks ya sex animal
Youre welcome, i'm anon and i just wanted to say hi
>hi anon, i'm femanon
>femanon, i like that name reminds me of the slut i raped and murdered couple years back. Anyway can i get your number? i wanna catch you sometime your free and get to know you.
>sure it 1800 55 1800
Thanks bitch, we gon fuck.
Marry me honey!

>>692968495
do you have a mental disorder

>>692968857
it's the w7 classic but i manually changed all the icons, window colors and some fonts.

>>692966176
Drink her drink, and offer to buy another one.

>>692969141
No, u just touch urself at night

>>692969207
This.

>>692969207
sounds like it could make one seem interesting, yeah

>>692967695
tits or gtfo

>>692968604
like those

>>692967695
show us your pussy

>>692966176

Nice shoes, they would look even better on my floor. Unless you want to keep them on, then they would look good while they're on you still. Not saying they look bad while they're on you, just saying they would also look good off of you. I don't mean you would take them off, I would. I wouldn't even care of your feet smelled a little. Not too bad though. Shit, now out sounds like I have a foot fetish. I mean, I like feet, and there's nothing wrong with a foot fetish, I just don't have one. Okay. Nevermind. Excuse me I have to poop

>>692966176
Don't be ugly

File: 1455964749810.jpg (115 KB, 422x500) Image search: [Google]

115 KB, 422x500

>>692969447

>>692967695
ayy you play guitar too!

>>692969975
lmao wtf eye for details nigg

>>692969975
How u know? Is it what she wrote it on?

>>692970337
yep guitar strings folder

>>692970241
if no boobs at least guitar pic

>>692970620
it's a chink piece of les paul spec II ltd shit, but i got it for free. keyboard is my main

>>692966176
>use a overly cliche pick up line
>Then say that you find introducing yourself to be an awkward affair and laugh off the pick up line
>sit next to her
>Talk and buy her drinks
Or skip that and just grap her from behind and whisper in her ear that you know where the bodies are buried.

>>692966176
i'm cured of aids

>>692966176
Does this cloth smell like chloroforme to you?

>>692970951
I'll just tell her I'm jewish and have many financial securities.

>>692966984
YOU DON'T FUCKING WEAR A HAT IF YOU ARE A GUY AND YOU'RE INDOORS! sorry, but it had to be said.

>>692971289
Fedoras are accepter in nightclubs, its class

>>692972120
Sorry, both my parents were marines... Hat came off at the door, no exceptions.

>>692972433
How does it feel to have two dads

>>692972433
U got two dads?

>>692972433
Lol this cuck

>>692967695
I'm a male and I have girl hands too. You know the drill:

TITS OR GTFO

>>692972872
it's not like it matters to prove it

>>692973168
It does matter, it's basically the only way in which you can state your business.

>>692967236
Ha, so much this that I'm embarrassed. Always make me giggle. And when you laugh, you let your guard down

>>692973442
it really works, especially if you are a 30 something handsome white dude

>>692968017
She seems all right. I'd chill with her

>>692966176
Hello. Do you Roody-Poo here often?

>>692966176
Its not how you stand by your car, its how you race your car.

>>692966176

"Excuse me, miss. Does this rag smell like chloroform?"

>>692969207
If you're even slightly cringy, that's weird as fuck and she'll be afraid of you lol

Could work for the hot and socially capable

>>692973360
yet i did already fag

>>692968017
>im 16
>she goes to my school
>July 4

>>692973360
Control your autism. You ppl are a worse distraction that the girls, who (for the most part) aren't even attention whoring

File: 1456638335148.jpg (35 KB, 300x300) Image search: [Google]

35 KB, 300x300

>>692966176
Walk up next to her, turn around and say 'Excuse me, you're standing on my cock.'

>>692974345
dunno how they think they're gonna ever get any
anyway op is dead
>>692974047
i agree, but taste differs. if he's a 4 and he goes for a 9, he's an idiot. if he goes for a 4-6 he has a good chance of landing a chick with a personality compatible enough with his, hence one that probably won't mind the drink thing from him.

>>692966176
"Fuck is that, a hairstyle?"

>>692966753
Ask about her day? How she's doing? jesus christ... This is why you never taking dating advice from a woman, they have no idea.I dont even need tits and a timestamp, it's obvious from that retarded shit.

>>692966176
"Ever heard of the famous hacker known as 4chan? You're looking right at him"

>>692975008
that's exactly why you take dating advice from a woman. they're different. if you're looking for someone who'd not respond well to smalltalk, then what would you rather suggest?

>>692974754
True shit. There's a weighted score for attractiveness and which traits matter varies from person to person

Also, I've posted tits before, but never cuz some neckbead was like "tits or gtfo whore." It was cuz of a combination of me feeling hot/wanting someone to sexualize me that day, boredom, and someone on here asking for it in a non-autistic/nice/funny way

>>692975186
I mean, they're kind of different, but not really. It's more like women are taught to put their puss is on lock down or they're useless which is bs

>>692975338
that works for you, gr8. everyone wants to see tits.

so post them hahaha xdxd lel xP

>>692975603
i meant different as in diverse, one from the other. i know nice smalltalk would work on me no matter the guy's face. sounded like mostly a safe bet for me, so i don't understand what someone could find unattractive or wrong about that way to go at a girl.

>>692966332
Always worked for me

>>692975186
If you went up to a woman and started asking how she was doing and how her day was and shit, she would blow you off, its creepy as hell and she doesnt know you. That's why you never take dating advice from a woman, because they assume they would react in a positive way to how you would talk to a man. You cant talk to women the same as men, women have heard that hey how you doing shit a thousand times. Im going to assume you dont get approached very often, because otherwise you would know that shit doesnt fly.

Girl you like funnel cakes? Because I'm about to funnel that cake in my mouth

>>692974754

OP here: not ded just taking a shit

File: 1466518977177.gif (2 MB, 400x398) Image search: [Google]

2 MB, 400x398

>>692967695
man hands LOL

>>692975880
it's flied for me a bunch of times, but maybe i just hang around the type of pub/bar where women generally get treated the same as men, as the places usually have a more 'familiar' or 'brotherly' feel about them. the sort of place where everyone tends to know everyone and it's not weird to just ask about someone's day. at least i favor that sort of thing. the less special treatment the guy hitting on me seems to offer me not because of interest, but because of me being the opposite sex, the less i'm interested. i personally always look for someone that would talk to me the same 'you would talk to a man', but it's just me.
i don't mind talking to strangers about whatever, and that's probably mostly why if someone with the same view of things approaches me in that manner will never bother me and has always worked.
that's why i was saying we're all diverse, some would not like it, i suppose the majority. the over-all 'lesson' of this deal is you should do your thing and if this is it and she doesn't appreciate it = she's not your type anyway.

>>692967695
What OS is that? Xp?

>>692975338
Have you posted YOUR tits though?

It also depends on age and type of guy. I honestly don't think it much matters what you say in the first 20 minutes. I'm pretty sure that all that will be forgotten if you fit the mold of what that woman deems to be attractive.

If she's into older, dominant men and you are one, you're in. If she's into skinny hipsters with tattoo's and you are, you're in. Whatever. I promise you that people who only date for 6 months couldn't tell you what their first meeting was like.

>>692976524
see
>>692968633

>>692976473
>it's flied...

>>692976524
XP reporting in.

"You come home with me, yes?"

(works best in a Russian accent)

>>692976567
Yes with timestamp, but never face and top less in the same shot. Im not quite that brave lol. I've seen what yall can do to me ha

>>692975796
Ah, gotcha

>>692976473
You think these guys need advice on how to talk to women they already know? gtfo. Thats easy. Yes it could work a few times, but mostly its not, so which do you think is the smartest move? If you do this and she doesnt like it, it means you're unoriginal, and its not that she isnt your type. If it was possible to use normal conversational tactics to attract women, the most common of men would be fucking supermodels. But it doesnt work that way. Maybe youre just easy to please or something.

>>692976473
This

>>692966176
if i asked you to go out with me, would the answer to that question be the same answer to this one?

>>692966924
rate my uncle

>>692966332

Eklund i farten.

>>692977305
yeah but we're talking dating, not hookups. you don't have to be 'original' because you don't have to be 'looking' for something. if what you thought was good works, she's good for you. if it doesn't, she's either too high or too low for you and neither's good for you. that's the way i see it - someone that i approach and isn't responsive to the way i thought would be suitable to approach them was probably not really worth approaching and it was proved to me.

>>692977305
No, because you fuck on your level. Attractive people only fuck attractive people, unless you have other attributes that scale up your number: common interests, humor, personality, money, or whatever the more attractive person values

>>692966176
You don't seat much for a fat girl.

>>692977698
samefag adding:
tldr is basically i'm not looking to 'get' someone/anyone, i'm looking to get someone similar in mindset to me, and if they're similar then i'll get them with what i chose to try lol cause it'll work.

>>692966494
Idiot

>>692977459
'What? Fuck off'

File: Black people dance.webm (2 MB, 640x640) Image search: [Google]

2 MB, 640x640

>>692966176

Ayyy, Yo! let me git up in dat ass bitch!

>>692977459
not terrible

>>692966176
Hi my name is Anon but tonight u will call me daddy

I'm the one that sells those 'big time hustler's' their coke.

>>692977698
Getting a date and getting a hookup start the same way, they end differently. You do have to be original, because otherwise you're just another dickhead hitting on her. See, you think it should work, but it really doesnt, thats what I was saying. Looking for someone with the same mindset as you is beside the point, its like if you tried to play hockey with a baseball bat, sure you could probably score a goal every now and then, but you're doing it wrong.

>>692977699
Yeah you're right, and attractive people dont do that shit, its common and unoriginal.

>>692977698
True shit

Me and my boyfriend started out as fuck buddies. It was a rebound and we didn't want anything else. He was funny and cocky and outgoing and kind of a dick but in a teasing way

But I also didn't want to date him because he was a bit of a slacker so I thought he wasn't that smart. And I was at school on scholarship for engineering

The more I got to know him the more I realized how smart he was, just in different areas that I know nothing about. Too bad humanities majors will never make as much money lol. Still love him tho

>>692966176
I've got an icepick

>>692978193
Depends on how attractive and the other persons preferences on being approached

>>692978193
idk i still see nothing wrong or 'beside the point' in looking for someone similar to you rather than just 'good'. i guess i like me.

>>692967695
Man the harpoons!!

You got a butt that won't quit.

>>692966176
looks like if i dont talk to you, nobody will

>>692966753
yeah, because all a girl wants is to be interviewed in a bar

you can ask those question but jesus make the conversation a tad more engaging; a good way is to guess stuff about her and let her correct you

>>692966494


Yeah, 'cos you're definitely the first person to have asked her that already this evening?

If it were as simple as that every time then why the fuck does OP feel the need to make this thread, you fucking mong

>>692972120
only fools wear any kind of hat indoors, no exceptions, and wearing a fedora in a night club is fucking tip of douchebaggery in itself

>>692978225
all the engineering females i know are already engaged to a sugardaddy or are banging the professor. lucky man you've chosen.

>>692978517
am the person who posted that
agree. :)

>>692966914

I've been going drinking / clubbing barhopping for nearly 4 years solid now... this never happens. Granted, right, I'm only average looking, but women will NEVER do this.

And besides, if you're attractive enough that women actually do this to you, you wouldn't be in this fucking thread now, would you?

>>692978683
i'm a 6-7 and i approach dudes
yeah there's rejection but the guys i go for aren't supermodels

>>692968495

this
a thousand times this

>>692978818
you gay then?

>>692968436
To be fair, asking a woman for a robust list of things women are attracted to is a reliable way to get a thinly-veiled explanation of how good her taste in men is.

>>692978363
You dont get it, its the wrong action for the situation. You figure out if theyre what you want during the conversation, but using what you suggest is lame and will get you nowhere 99/100 times, so really using your tactics you're far less likely to find someone like you because youll get blown off before they figure out what youre like.

>>692978346
No shit sherlock, but preference for being approached usually doesnt include being lame and like every else who didnt work out.

all my one night stands never started out as a night were im out to get laid. women flock to crowds/groups and fun. good times are always just set infront of them or they are always allowed to be a part of the good time bc female. more then 5 times this has happenned : hang with homies during day, sun goes down and we all mob to a bar to continue having fun (you bet your ass my hat stays on you handcuffed manly man). girls notice group of young guys having fun. and basically they either walk right up to be a part of what were doing or they use every gesture known to humans to suggest you go invite them into your group. let them come along to keep having fun. one goes home with you.

File: indeed.jpg (42 KB, 250x250) Image search: [Google]

42 KB, 250x250

>>692969701

>>692966176
Hey. Then just hornily look into her face.

>>692966176
Hi, wanna chat?

Saying shitty pickup lines like "did it hurt when you fell out of heaven" is for idiots.

>>692978581
I feel super lucky tbh

He's sexy ad hell, funny, smart, charming, knows how to help like no one else when I'm down, and is kinky as duck

It's cliche as shit, but we've been together for 3 years and I swear I love him more everyday

>>692966176
you damn well know you won't approach a girl if your life depended on it. leave it to the guys in the picture to get pussy. you're destined for a life of self abuse.

>>692979051
Most of the other tactics in this thread are too fucking tryhard for me

The only way the tryhard ones work is if you admit you sound like a dueschebag (spelling?) And then act like a normal human being. But it works less for me

>>692978683
it happens to me often and im not even that attractive, just decent

>>692966938

I bet the jew is jerking it to her cucked gf

>>692966176
chloroform breaks the ice for me

>>692979254
This
How did I forget that? Lol

My bf isn't red pill or anything, but he has never bought a girl a drink as an ice breaker ever. He buys mine now tho ;) but only because we're dating

Like, you gotta be you man, and if shit comes together, it comes together. If not, don't sweat it

>>692979597
Im not talking about the tactics in this thread, theyre mostly jokes anyway.

Mashed potatoes? Where's the gravy, baby?

>>692979747
Hey you're only like the 3rd fucking person in this thread to use that old, shitty joke. Get some new material you fucking piece of shit

>>692979810
Still, doing social acrobatics just comes off as cheesy

What would you do then?

>>692966176
"You are too good looking for being alone without a guy so maybe you are a lesbian or your ex didn't know what (treasure) he had."

This works best in Finnish and sounds retarded and autistic as fuck in English.

File: 1311609905142.jpg (44 KB, 550x474) Image search: [Google]

44 KB, 550x474

>>692966176
"what is a hot place like you doing in a girl like this?"

>>692978818

I'm assuming your female, or homosexual. Either way, by default, you have it easier. Guys are simply much easier to pull. There are a much highger number of men who are happy to fuck a total stranger same night than there are women. Obviously, this isn't true of every man, and there are plenty of ladies also who enjoy fucken' on the same night, but statistically speaking, gay men and women have a much easier time pulling.

Society doesn't shame men for casual sex - and more importantly, neither do their peers! When was the last time you heard a heterosexual male sincerely complain that a friend of is slept with too many people? Not exactly often, right? Now imagine I;m taling about a girl. Women are incredibly judgemental of other women, and as a result of that, many of them feel socially pressured to shoot down the majority of advances made agaisnt them. Men don't have that encumbrance.

talking to me casually, i guess you could say like you would to a man still works for me though, eh.

Pulls out $100 dollars
Puts it in girls hand
Say "can you tell me that I matter"

>>692980235
Is that why foreign guys sound creepy as shit when they hit on you online? Haha, I always thought it was just autism

Still, I doubt that sounds smooth in any language?

>>692980317
He has the most jew looking face I've ever seen
Holy fucking shit

File: 5.jpg (111 KB, 850x637) Image search: [Google]

111 KB, 850x637

>>692966176
show her this picture and ur golden bro.

>>692980505
everything you say is true, yes, but we're talking dating, not hooking up / fucking first night. anyway, i don't see why someone would look for a partner who abides by those social pressure rules in particular

>>692980712
He's Italian. No kike blood.

>>692980505
Nah, that's not true. The smarter the group of guys (not talking about autists, like we'll rounded smart people), the more male-slut shaming there is. Because it makes them look trashy to their counterpart--the hot, well rounded smart chicks

>>692980048
If you want to see how people react to unoriginal shit, Exibit A: >>692979931

It depends on the situation, you have to adjust. Mostly I tend to get eye contact first to see if she's even interested, then if she is I go in and introduce myself to her and her friends, because theyre always with friends. Then it's humor humor humor, telling them about myself, finding out what theyre into. I make sure they have a good time around me. When I get the trust of her friends I get her alone and let her know Im interested in seeing more, number, leave. Its a whole thing, and it certainly doesnt include hey how was your day, because that kills the conversation flat.

>>692980759
Works best if it's a creep shot of her from earlier that day

>>692980801
Isn't that Jesse Eisenberg?

File: 1466014507440.webm (3 MB, 960x540) Image search: [Google]

3 MB, 960x540

>Follow the niggers ftom the bar to their section 8 apartment.
>Wait a few hours until the girl gets kicked out and falls on the floor.
>Pick her up and take her home.
>The next day I have a bowl of eggs ready for her.
>As she wakes up disoriented, she starts screaming.
>I shush her and say "you don't have to tell me what happened but you do have to eat all these eggs"

File: Natsuki Fag.gif (500 KB, 480x270) Image search: [Google]

500 KB, 480x270

>>692967695
the fuck is wrong with your fingers? fucking faggot.

File: ESP Horizon Custom in Reindeer Blue (NAMM show piece).jpg (44 KB, 1000x399) Image search: [Google]

44 KB, 1000x399

>>692967695
Ernie Ball 11's? You fucking whore.

>>692980903
First off, the thing I complained about was that the person said a dumb meme, which is the social equivalent of opening with a stale pick up line

Also, I'm pretty sure you just described going up and just having a normal conversation. There were no tricks in that. That's just understanding basic social cues

>>692980801
>He's Italian
Bullshit, hes a jew if you can't tell by looking at his rat like face you must be blind

>>692980620
Trust me it works, English just lacks many words that can be used to imply certain things in this context so the whole point is lost in translation. Then again this can work in both ways because we don't have some words that you can use in English.

>>692981055
yeah they're faggy because i'm a chick moron
- if not bait -

>>692978818

Where are you from to actually approach men like that? In the UK this never happens, the women here never approach men first

I've heard of it happening a grand total of once, amongst everyone I've ever met / lived with in this country

>>692981203
Yeah and I said your hey how you doing how was your day shit was the problem. You notice in there I said nothing about some stupid shit like that. I dont care what you were originally complaining about, I was replying to what you said.

>>692981147
9 actually

>>692979786

>Like, you gotta be you man, and if shit comes together, it comes together. If not, don't sweat it

this is literally the only good piece of advice in this entire thread

>>692981442
Ah, OK then. At least you're a lady.

>>692966753
>take it from a femanom
>implying a cunt knows what she wants
Best pick up line is to show her how fucking rich you are. Works every single time. Even with rich bitches since women are naturally greedy.
If you are not rich you better are fucking good looking, so that her primal instincts click in and she wants ro fuck. Woman dont really think before they fuck. They are more like niggers.

>>692981317
My favorite foreign word (don't remember the actual word, just the translation) I'd one I so wish we had here. I'd use it all the time

It basically means "that moment when you just realized a comeback you should have said but it's too late and you don't get to use it" but it's one word

>>692981598
nleh gross

>>692971289
I would love wearing hats but i've yet to find any hat that's acceptable in 2016, indoor or outdoor. This isn't 1936

>>692981415
I mean, I just more meant the fact that it was just talk like a human

Guess we're on the same side and you're just wrapped up in semantics lol

Plus "how you doing?" Is basically the same as "hi." Half the time ppl don't even answer they just say it back as a greeting

>>692981548
That reaks of hippy tho

File: hold dis L.gif (2 MB, 320x320) Image search: [Google]

2 MB, 320x320

>>692966984
package you need to sign for anon
>>692969207
top pip

Are you homework? Because I should be doing you.

>>692966176
respond pls

>>692978225
You sound like my x, Kelley?

>>692981598
True, and the thing to remember is rich means different things to different women. Women working at a subway in the sticks are much more easily impressed then women in LA for example

>>692981598
lol This is actually true though, women are whores deep down, all the feelings and types are a cover.

>>692981814
I may have gone through a hippie phase in high school... might have slipped out again ha

But for real, ppl psych themselves out when they worry too much about shit that doesn't matter. Better to go home alone and have a good time, than stress about it, spaghetti, and still go home alone. The first one gives you better chances if you're one of those people that gets in their head too much

>>692981807
No, you were being specific. But whatever I can see you know you're wrong.

File: DFC.jpg (59 KB, 332x297) Image search: [Google]

59 KB, 332x297

>>692981332
did someone press randomize on tour fingers? queershit.

>>692981987
No, but that's my mom's name. So unless you're in your 40s, not even close ha

>>692982101
The autism... chill. It's a semantics argument. Go back and read my shit

>>692982075
Well yeah, but stressing about shit can be a good thing sometimes. It can make you better, and make you try things out of your comfort zone.

>>692982336
I did read it, you were wrong, just admit it.

File: Jones Crusher.gif (355 KB, 260x200) Image search: [Google]

355 KB, 260x200

>>692981442
Since we've thankfully established you're not some .016-playing jones crusher, on what do you put those 9's?

And what do you play once you do?

>>692979368
Whatever you need to tell yourself

>>692981748
What? You dont like to see yourself as you are?
You are not a princess....your fucking pussy smells like fish and tastes like copper. I could go 100years without your kind. I really rather masturbate than to have these stupid discussions about the most comprehensible concepts because another woman never learned to use her brain. It's really hard to stand the stupidity of most woman, once you ignore they have a pussy and see them as equal human beings.

>>692966176
Why hello there m'lady *tips fedora*
What brings you here on this fine evening? *sips on virgin white russian*

>>692982168
Its crazy how similar our stories are. But I don't want to even go there

File: NO_MA'AM_holds_Springer_hostage.png (403 KB, 642x476) Image search: [Google]

403 KB, 642x476

>>692982641
And before you idiots try to flame me now, remember im in a gang.

>>692982435
>>692982478
Like you even know which posts are mine

I spoke in generalities, not specifics, and anyways thats still not a terrible way to approach someone. Your "better" way was the same shit I was saying, you just summarized it. Way to "win"

>>692983076
You're the pivot man, right?

>>692978541
god dam you people are fucking cucks. she say yes if she's attracted to you.

>>692983064
Well let's hear it. Whats your name m8?

>>692983213
You retard, I know which post I fucking responded to. They seem the same, but your way was lame, mine is the right way. Sorry you have no eye for subtlety.

>>692966176
Always treat them like shit and make them feel like they are beneath you. I like to use something like:

>Hey, I'd buy you a drink but you are fat as shit so you probably don't need the extra calories.

>>692966176
AYYO U WAN SUM FUG GURL

File: Sex advice from :b:.jpg (9 KB, 276x182) Image search: [Google]

9 KB, 276x182

>>692983603
I enjoy how these threads always devolve into just what anyone imagines a bunch of /b/tards trying to talk to women would be like.

>>692966176

hi

>>692966630
t or g

Hi I saw you sitting alone..would you like to chat?

>>692983603
That's all I was talking about the whole time... God you're stupid

Nig<

>hi, can I buy your underwear?
First thing I ever said to my wife, shit works. anything after that will be a hell of a lot less awkward and weird.

>>692983962
Yeah because nobody on /b/ can get laid. We're all anonymous hackers too

>>692984186
You still dont fucking get it, its like trying to explain astrophysics to a wino. Go play with your dolls, men are talking.

>>692966753
>a... are... are you alone?

File: Suave.jpg (29 KB, 600x585) Image search: [Google]

29 KB, 600x585

>>692966630
"Hi, I get dubs all the time...especially on Friday and Saturday night."

>>692966176
I'm serious if you say this clearly and correctly she'll laugh

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

>>692984382
I'm a female engineer, if you're going for sexism, you're gonna have to try a little harder than that

>>692966176

Hey sugar, how do you fancy throwing away 30,000 years of evolution?

>>692966176
Hello. I am a 15 year old Rhinoceros. The only problem is that my horn on my head is soft and limp. As you may know this is very devastating to a rhino like myself. If there are any rhinos out there that can help me with my problem it would be appreciated.

File: wuuuut.png (163 KB, 270x320) Image search: [Google]

163 KB, 270x320

>>692984836
Im the President of the United States, see I can lie on the internet too.

>>692984836
you engineer females?
How's the pay

>>692984836
Nope, you're not either of those things.

>>692967695
Goddam you're a chubby one.