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Asked a bi girl when I was fingering her of she likes guys more than girls now. Really cringy cuz she was my gf at the time. Oh well

Your mom cunt bitch.

>>691009507
stick a pen in my dick
felt p good at the time but my dick felt like it was being stabbed every time i took a piss for 3 days after.. most painful thing i have ever experienced

>>691009507
fucked my hand

>>691009862
The feels bro

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>>691010562
mad man

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>>691009507

>>691010798
Well memed friend

>>691010904
You fucked a shoe?

>>691011011
we said stupid

>>691010904
Did it even feel good

I'm not a lesbian and would never ever date a girl because I love dick too much, but if I get super horny I'll masturbate to lesbian porn. sort of disgusts me

>>691011220
fucking amazing

>>691009507
Tried shoving a cucumber up my ass. Didn't work. My stinky shit hole is too tight

>>691011294
Do you have any funny shoe fucking stories?

get married

>>691011506
Not really, I just steal them from coworkers offices and fuck 'em.

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>>691011228
>im a girl

Was being a sissy cuck on cam for a girl. Let her screenshot all kinds of embarrassing shit cause i was so horny and loving it. She told me to give her my credit card info so I did. I was so fucking into it at the time. She had it maxed in like half hour.

>>691011622
Okay

>>691011663
ok dude lmao

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>>691011841
dont you dude me m8

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>>691011705
Kek, thanks for sharing anon

I said something along the lines of "I want to tap that uterus so hard" it sounded super stupid

>>691011705
How much debt did she put you in

>>691011663
tits and timestamp or GTFO

>Poked a girl in the crotch several times who was like 10 (I was 15).
>Masturbate on said girl's bed
>Touch her in her sleep
>Dress my little brother's stuffed animals in my mom's underwear and humped them
>Spied on my mom taking a bath
>Stuck an unsharpened pencil up my ass
>Masturbated outside in the rain
>Masturbated in my mom's car
>Put my hand down my sleeping cousin's pants
>Post pictures of facebook friends in a fap thread, including my cousin
>Fap to pretty much every kind of porn on my parent's couch
>Repeatedly fuck up my parent's computer with porn to the point they didn't let me use it anymore.

The list goes on

>>691012146
heh man cervix play is my fetish so i say shit like that too

>>691012089
Apparently what I do best is please others

>>691012158
Almost 5000

>>691011228
Tits or GTFO

>>691012367
jesus dude ouch did you get anything in return?

>>691012290
are you a registered sex offender by any chance?

>>691012572
nope lol. i'm generally considered a nice guy with good morals. kek

>>691012511
Just got humiliated and made fun of

>>691010904
>>691011011
>>691011122
Absolute kek

>>691012709
>generally considered a nice guy
so are sex offenders...they offer lolipops

>>691012900
Yea I should have gotten in trouble for a lot of shit. Feels good to get that out of my system

>>691012808
fuuuuuck oh man why do we do such dumb shit for pussy, did you try and reverse the transactions?

>>691012290
>Masturbated outside in the rain

My sides

>>691012808
i sometimes give away hundreds of dollars to girls ive only chatted to for 20 minutes or so online, and ive never even seen or heard on cam, just because they tell me to and it makes me cum so hard knowing they are getting my hard-earned cash for doing literally nothing. i feel llike such a bitch, like a slave, and it makes me cum buckets.

instantly regret it afterward though, every time.

>>691013112
*naked, on the ground

Fucked a landwhale who turned out to be a feminist.

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>>691013194
wtf

>>691013142
>every time

>>691013019
Nope let her have it all

>>691013142
I know right it was such a rush I kinda want to do it again

>>691013266
Kek, story?

>>691013632
id say dont bother. it can get very very addictive. there are actually support groups for guys who are addicted to financial slavery. its because it fucks with your dopamine, in a similar way that gambling does. and youll find yourself needing to give more and more money away each time to get the same high.

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>>691013112
>>691012290
watch out for that lightning
>penis = lightning rod

>>691014034
> there are people rn who are addicted to giving away money
What a time to be alive

>>691014034
Well then I am lucky no femanons are trying to talk me into it. It originally happened with a girl I met on here

i have fucked and came in many girls' shoes not to their awareness

>>691014836
Really?

>>691014415
Jesus dude...

>>691015234
yes. all different types of girls and shoes, too

>>691015362
But why?

>>691015485
I just find it hot that my cum is all over their feet and that they have no clue

>>691015613
O

>be in kindergarten
>tell girl dick tastes like cherry
>girl is like no way
>im like yeye
>get seen by 15 year old intern while she proofs me wrong
>ohshit.png
>She didnt do anything after that
>Flabbergasted//Didnt even know what i was doing

fap under table in school
>think nobody sees me
>everybody sees me
>wake me up
>cant wake up

>>691016567
They def saw you lol they just didnt speak up

I had never used a dildo on my ass before and i was curious so i stole my gf's one which was pretty big and proceeded to fuck myself with it

Almost broke my anus. didnt stop hurting for about 2 weeks and i didnt shit normal for about 2 months. nothing will ever go up my ass again.

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>>691016921

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>be me a few weeks ago
>honry as fuck rubbing my dick home alone
>on AFF looking for sloots
>find couple in same city wanting to bang fuckyeah.scr
>they give address and tell me to just walk in
>driving there with bubble gut from nerves
>pull up at house and walk inside
>fuck strangers wife while he watches and video tapes
>didn't wear condom feelsrealgoodman
>mfw this 40yo milf has probally fucked hundreds of guys and I hit it raw.

>>691009507
>Be me, be 15, living with my little sisters and slutty welfare-abusing mom, no dad
>stuck at home watching younger sisters again, fifth time that week.
>About 11:30 AM, mum stumbles in, shitfaced drunk, higher than a kite, wearing a ruffled mini club dress
>Doesn't even say hi, doesn't even make it to her own goddamned bedroom, just flops half on the couch half on the floor
>Help her out, try (and largely fail) not to look or grope her as I help her on to the couch
>half an hour later, sisters taking a nap in their bedroom, mom still passed out on the couch, check to make sure she's still breathing and head off to my room for a fap
>unbelievably turned on (say whatever you want, getting an eyefull and feeling up an attractive woman had me rock hard, and my fifteen year old penis gave zero shits about silly things like family relation.
>head to my room and pull out my phone
1/2

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>>691017593
go on...

>>691018074
part 2
http://myhentaicomics.com/index.php/Exploited

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>>691018745
ur a nigger

>>691017593
>phone out, ready to fap, aaand
>the fucking internet was out
>I later found out that my mom hadn't paid the cell company
>Frustrated as hell, fucking diamonds in my pants, but don't feel like fapping without some material to work with so I head back out to he living room.
>Sit down, gonna watch some TV
>Haha, no, mom hadn't paid for that either. Well then.
>Put in a DVD.
>half an hour in, still rock hard, can't stop stealing glances at my mom sitting there completely fucking dead to the world passed out in that maddeningly tight minidress
>Being an angry horny teenager, I more or less figure "fuck it, I don't owe this bitch a thing" and whip it out to fap to her (admittedly fantastic) tits.
(Judge me if you want, but "watching sisters while mom is clubbing/fucking some guy/passed out pretty much describes my entire adolescence. I had some problems, okay?)
>Jerking off to the sight of my own unconcious (but undeniably attractive) mother's rack.
>Somehow I decided that I needed to make the situation EVEN WORSE and pulled her dress down to play with her tits while jerking off.
>I know from past experience that when she's passed out like that nothing short of cold water or an electic shock will wake her up, so I move her so that she's laying down on the couch.
>Titfuck her and bllow the biggest load of my life up to that point all over her chest.

Never got caught for that, or anything else I did, because she was always high.

Long story short, have you ever been so horny you molested your own mother?

>>691010458
Oh shit, I did that too. I also bled out piss for one of those day.

>>691018745
The fuck? Dude. Just no.

> be 14
> Niece (11) sleeps in my bedroom
> Watching a horror movie
> She's too scared
> Asks if she can lay in bed w me til the movie finish
> sure, why not?
> I start spooning her
> She likes it
> She opens her butt cheeks a bit
> im fucking hard, start to masturbate with them
> Shes horny, a bit wet
> start kissing her, playing with her tongue
> her nipples are hard, i start to play with em
> place my dick between her legs and pussy
> she loves it
> ask if she can lick or blow me
> she's to ashamed
> Only kiss my dick a few times
> tell her to give me a handjob
> She does
> cum in her chest and belly
> Both love it
> did this a lot of times
> 10 years happened and we dont talk about this (neither try to do it again)

>>691019260
What is it?

>>691009507
Fall asleep waiting for fuck buddy to arrive and phone calls didn't wake me up.

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>>691009507
bought a fleshlight

>>691019454
part 2

felt my mom while she was asleep

also a cousin

>>691019702
If you want part two, it's posted. >>691019112
and it's not fucking yellow.

>>691019702
Of what

>>691017593
>>691019112
You ever do anything else to her or to your sisters?

>>691009507
Don't you talk to me or my son again.

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>>691009507
Rubbed alcohol on my balls once, wasn't horny but wanted to try it and see what happens without even doing a small google search, it felt like I was teabagging the face of the Old Iron King

Pic related

Got drunk at a company party and headed back to a coworker's hotel room. She was into me but I couldn't really stand her; I went with her cuz I was drunk, horny, ,and had gone through a long dry spell. I hatefucked her; took out on her all the anger I had towards her and other women I knew. I fucked her rough and angrily and figured she would hate it, but she loved it and thought it meant we were destined to be together. After that one night it took months to convince her I didn't want to be with her.

>>691009507
>took my toothbrush
>used the bristles to brush my asshole while i jacked off
>finished
>saw brown on toothbrush
>didn't even wash it fully
>just rinsed until i stopped seeing brown
>brushed my teeth with it later

>>691020800
youre the reason feminists exist

>>691020143
>mom
Yes, though I now regret it.
>sisters
Fuck. No. I'd never touch them. I practically raised them for crying out loud.

As for my mom, use your imagination. I was an angry horny teenaged boy who realized he could now touch the milf he'd been watching for years.

To put this into perspective, my mom had me when she was 15, and she aged well, so by the time I reached my teenage years she was only in her late twenties. She had a great body (not that I fucking know how she kept her looks, that woman lived on a steady diet of drugs alcohol and fast food), she had great tits, a decent ass, and she always dressed like a slut. She was never a provider, and was rarely in any way caring or intimate with me. Now try to imagine how

>>691021238
I did this but with my brothers toothbrush

>>691021331
why would you regret that? i would have killed as a teenager to have a slutty megamilf for a mom

>>691021272
this one guy?

>>691021331
Last bit got cut off.

Now try to imagine how a horny angry intimacy starved teenager would handle that situation. Some nights when she was especially high and drunk if my sisters were asleep I'd have her blow me, because she was usually too fucked to realize it. I even fucked her a couple of times (though she was thankfully not my first), and In retrospect I'm fairly certain she knew or at least had some idea.

During the last few years of my schooling my mom finally started to get her shit together, and over the past couple of years she's actually started raising my sisters on her own, and she brings in decent money from her job (went to culinary school and got a job as a chef/cook/whatever at a nice restaurant). Ironically she looks better now than she did then. Amazing what a healthy diet, enough sleep, and quitting drugs will do.

Had sex without a condom bitches lie about BC so be careful boys!

>>691022269
do u have pics of ur mom? Id love to blow a load to her after reading your story

>>691017593
>>691019112
>>691021331
>>691021544
>>691022269
What the fuck is wrong with you people?

>>691022509
you're on /b/ you nigger

Gave a dog a blowjob. Don't even regret it.

>>691022496
>Story about regretting molesting and raping my mother
>Ending about my mom getting her shit together and getting healthy

>Got pics bruh?

This made me laugh so hard. Thanks anon, I needed that. That was so stereotypically 4chan of you.

All jokes aside, I haven't even talked to my mom in a year in a half, so I don't have any pictures. I never took any pictures back when I was getting her naked, because I was always worried people would find out if I did, and I didn't want any photographic evidence and shit.

>>691023279
why haven't you spoken to her in a year?

now might be a good time to get back with the family (and take some pics)

pics or it didn't happen

Tried eating out my younger stepsister when she was asleep. (I was like 12 and she was 10 iirc).

She woke up and I claimed I was just trying to look out her window and thats why I was on her top bunk. Why are my pants down she asked. I claimed not to know.

That bold attempt gave me the confidence to propose a "truth or dare" game that gradually lead to alot of oral sex where she swallowed my load. No regrets and I get rock hard thinking about it, but oddly enough I'm not into lolicon or paedo shit at all.

>>691023270
Why?

Here
https://youtu.be/Pg55w30HKxM

>>691009507
lost my virginity in a pool last night to my gf/Came inside

>>691009507
I came to 4chan

>>691023593
We kind of had a falling out two years ago. I wasn't exactly in the best of shape coming out of a house like that. We've both got our lives sorted out by this point and most of the drama is done at this point, but we never really reconciled. Kind of hard to look each other in the eyes at this point.

>>691023734

Why? Why do we do any of this? Because human nature is to lose self control when aroused...

>>691024117
Kek

>>691024177
Are you a male or female?

>>691024281

Unfortunately for both of us, male.

>>691009507
>litterly everything i did when horny from ages 12-17

>>691024154

Anon please detailed green text first BJ and then first fuck.

Used a toilet paper roll as a flesh light, the inside had a flap of cardboard sticking out so it scraped the head of my penis. I didn't notice until the next day, when I was taking a piss I saw a pretty big red scrape on my penis, it stung. Had it for about a two weeks then it was gone, I didn't jack off for days cuz the scrape hurt too much.

>>691024538
Thats even worse then the fact that it was a dog anon

>>691019446
Damn that's hot. How could you tell she was wet, Anon? Did she not have any bottoms on? Care to share any other stories with her?

>>691017058
>pfff

>>691016249
Savage kindergartener

>>691025029

That I am male, or that I wish I was female?

>>691021381
Dude, ugh, that's disgusting, you brush your teeth with your brother's toothbrush?

>>691025276
The fact you preformed a homosexual act

Got home from a bar one night. Everyone i tried hitting up was already passed the fuck out. Went on craigslist, 15 minutes later, getting a blowjob from a dude. Best damn bj ive ever had

>>691020333
>trips checked
top kek

Put ants in my urethra.

>>691025393

Meh. I would do it again without a second thought.

>>691021272
underrated post XD

>>691021272
That's not fair he probably hasn't even been alive that long.

>>691025680
Whatever floats your boat bro

this was actually kinda recent

>be me bout 2 weeks ago
>girl i've been talking to for a bit comes over
>she says shes on the rag
>im thinkin im gonna bust a nut today somehow
>we're laying down, end up suckin on er tiddies after making out, etc
>she seems pretty into it, i go do undo her pants, she stops me
>i go back to kissing her neck, try rubbing her pussy over her pants
>shes into it, going good so far
>get my dick out, ask her to get jerked off
>she says no
>i said to myself "what a bitch"
>i go back to rubbing one out for her over her pants, cant tell if i was any good or if shes good at faking
>im on my knees sitting there, jerking myself off and trying to pleasure her
>she seemed pretty good at acting out an orgasm
>i cum right on her black yoga pants
>she says she has to leave
>hasnt texted me back since

>>691025276
It's cool Anon, I'm a straight guy and I would blow a dog if given the opportunity. I even have once myself; it was a friend's dog, and if given the opportunity I would do it again. The dog weighs 120 pounds, and it's dick was absolutely enormous. The knot was about the size of my fist. I tried to fuck their female dog as well, but she was too tight and I couldn't fit it in.

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>>691022269
Drug her drink while she's not looking and fuck her brains out.

She wont suspect a thing. Go ahead, bro. She put the family in your hands, and didn't bother to try and take of y'all. Just get what you deserve.

>>691025948
What type of dog where they?

>>691025872
She does sound like a bitch, I think you dodged a bullet

>>691024718
Sure, just give me a minute. Typing on my phone here so it takes me a while.

>>691012290
>>Repeatedly fuck up my parent's computer with porn to the point they didn't let me use it anymore.

how can you fuck up this bad? Have a decent AV and adblocker, and there's no way you can fuck anything up

>>691010458
>>691019169
A ball point pen down the urethra? (or up it depending on the angle of your penilistical memberism)

>>691026125
The male was a Great Dane, and the female was an Australian Shepherd.

>>691017427
that hair line, bro

>>691026216
kinda sucks, i was hoping to make a new fuckbuddy
probably saw my small unit

>>691019446
Anon is suggesting to derail this into a new thread: Things that never happened

>>691024872
I tried sticking my dick in a a toilet paper roll.
It was too thick.
I stuck in in when it was flacid once and got hard... Felt really fucking weird to pull out.

>>691026570
whats this AFF thing? never heard of it, sounds de-e-e-ecent

>>691012290
Are You me?

>>691026747
AdultFriendFinder, that site is old as fuck. I can remember seeing it in 2002

>>691026328
We didn't have ad blocker, and I went to a lot of virusey sites and other stuff that I didn't know to avoid

>>691026824
Yes

>>691024718
please

>>691026576
She sounds both selfish and prude. To be honest with you, I don't think it was going to happen

>>691026747
fuck if I know. I'm a faggot so you're asking the wrong person lol

>>691027026
ahhh, is that actually legit though?

>>691011470
Nice and tight boipussy

>>691019112
doesn't that bother you? how can you even look her in the eye anymore dude..

>>691027174
yeah, probably right anon
goddamn women

>>691013266
Me 2 wouldn't let me do it right

>>691027223
It was not in 2002, LOL. I haven't even thought about it since then, so I have no idea. It's probably a better gamble than Craigslist personals though.

>>691027223
I almost met a couple of people on there. One chick was young and cute and married to a guy in the military and we almost hooked up. Lots of older, desperate people. There's were a lot of bots and spam too though that they may or may not have cleaned up since then. (like 2011)

>>691009507
was with my gf at her cousin's wedding surrounded by bitches with huge titties in tight dresses. couldn't take it anymore and went outside into the woods and rubbed one off

I curled up right before the climax and because my horny mind thought it was a good idea, i came all over my face.

>>691027827
Kek

>>691025872
>i said to myself "what a bitch"
kek

can't stop laughing at this

>>691024718
>>691026266

>Be me, 16 years old, about five months after I'd started "playing" with mom.
>had her a couple times a week since then, no penetration up to that point.
>Walking home from a friend's house, about two AM.
>friend was female, hot, attracted to me, I was sure I was going to get some until her dad came home and ran me out of the house.
>Silently hoping my mom is home or at least on her way home.
>get home, it's quiet, check mom's room, she's passed out in bed.
>sisters at grandparent's house for the weekend so I check to make sure she's really, really out
>slip out of my jeans, throw them in my room, and crawl into bed with her
>Just cuddling and feeling her up at first, enjoying the warmth and the feeling of intimacy
(A lot of my frustration with her come from the fact that even when I was a little kid she treated me more like a distraction than anything else, so I enjoyed the intimacy almost more than the sex. Many nights if I knew I had lots of time I'd just spoon her, press my cock in between her ass cheeks, and spend a few hours cuddling her and feeling her up until I'd blow my load all over her lower back or tits)
contd.

>>691012290
I think I could I hang out with you. We'd double our efforts and collaborate on some fucked up shit.

>>691027524
never thought of trying that
been under a dry spell for 2 years lmao

>>691021764
Kek

>>691028303
fuck yea! let's go bowling. just kidding I hate bowling. don't ever ask me to go bowling.

>>691027999
i figured the
>she seemed pretty good at acting out an orgasm
would get more keks lmao

I made a homemade onahole in middle school because i was so horny once. It was made from an empty toliet paper roll, a sock, stuffing, and a lot of lotion. It didnt feel very good.
Also i took creepvids of my sister in the shower through the keyhole of our old bathroom door. She found it and broke the phone/mem card. Im just glad shes never brought it up again tbqh familia.

>>691009507
Took my little sister's barbies, stripped them naked, try to hump them for about an hour, then bust my nuts all over them and threw them back in her toybox without putting the clothes back on.

>>691014034
I USED to be addicted to cuck porn but I got tf out of that thank god. Now I'm a bit into general femdom but I'm trying to get completely out of it.

>>691028338
What, Craigslist personals? It's a cesspool. I think it's mostly hookers and prostitutes. Save yourself the trouble and get a fleshlight. I ordered one from Bad Dragon, and it was a good investment.

>>691014836
I've seen you here before, you faggot. Your gf's in on it too right?

>>691016567
This kid at my school did that.

>>691029181
>thinking there is only one shoe pervert on /b/
>mfw
>mfw no_face.gif

one night, I was horny and didn't want to use my hands to jack off, so I spent hours making a hole in my foam roller it was very hard to get it deep and wide enough for a dick. It felt damn good with some Vaseline though

>>691027173
>>691024718
>>691028159
>lying in bed with mom, she was naked save for a g-string
(or possibly a t-string, not entirely clear on the difference)
>Go through my usual stuff, playing with her tits, groping her ass, fingering her pussy, etc.
>One of my favorite things to do was to roll her onto her back and lie on top of her feeling her tits, rubbing my cock between her thighs, and kissing her
(I think it was like the third time I "played" with her that I discovered that my mom, even when entirely fucking dead to the world, will move her lips and tongue if you put something in her mouth. It wasn't exactly making out, and at first it felt kind of awkward, but I fucking loved it. For my entire life I couldn't remember my mother ever kissing my, now I could kiss those pouty pink lips of hers and shove my tongue into her mouth)
>somehow by that point I hadn't put two and two together, but I finally had an idea.
>Look at her lips... imafuckit.jpg
>Trying to figure out the best way to do this, I straddle her chest the way I did to titfuck her, but scoot up a bit to get my cockhead on her lips.
>not sure how to do this
>Don't want to choke her
>slowly, carefully, I pull her mouth open and push inside
>feelsgoodman
>even just her lips on my cock felt amazing: I was getting off more to this than anything I'd ever gotten from any girls at school.
>she starts gently wiggling her tongue like she does whenever something enters her mouth, the god damned slut
I actually remember being simultaniously angry and super fucking happy that my mom could give a better blowjob in her sleep than any of the girls I'd dated could when they were awake.
contd.

>>691029021
Honestly, there is no real cuck porn. A cuck is when a woman deceives. Says the baby she has belongs to the man she is with (when it isn't)

You were not into cuck porn. You were into hotwife porn.

Know the difference, as it can save your life.

Black men are cucked more than any other race. I don't want to say all those little black babies look the same but... uhhh - think Maury Povich "you are not the father".

>>691028159
WHERE IS THE CONTINUE

>>691016249
You ain't a very good teacher