Do what do you want to do.

Don't kill yourself over someone who wouldn't kill for you.
also Sauce?

>>689563270

Never go to >>>/b/

Sadly, i disregarded it.

>>689563270
it is not what you know, it is who you know

>>689563270
"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be."

Quit labeling yourself and living in a bubble.

>>689563270
>"Ante la duda la más tetuda" by the mother of a friend of mine

>>689564307
Pero a mi me gustan mas los culos :/

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Don't stick your dick in crazy!
Have an exit for any situation!
Always always wear a condom!

>>689563270
only use girls for pleasurements

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ccept certain inalienable truths
Prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too, will get old
And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young
Prices were reasonable, politicians were noble
And children respected their elders

>>689563270
Don't ever get married.

>>689563270
this whole video i was just waiting for her to break his dick. she has bad form.

Kill yourself

>>689565034
source?

interested in seeing this. (sweats profusely)

>>689563270
James Bond can never be black

Dont stick it more than once in girls who have a bad familyconnection with her parents/grandparents etc.

>>689565452
You've obviously seen all of Idris Elba's stuff, right?

back to /pol/ retard

First is you, second your family, third is everything else.
And get out of your confort zone when you feel you will regret not doing something.

>>689565442
not saying it happens, never seen op's vid before now.
but fuck that dick has some mean bend in it. shes leaning way to far forward, and ive had it happen enough times to me. never severe. just painful.

"Cui bono," or "who profits?"

Always look at who has what to gain from certain actions or non-actions. Usually, powers greater than yourself will ask you to do something or not to do something, thinks a certain way or not think a certain way, ask you to buy or not to buy something and crap of that sort. Always look at who gains from doing or not doing what they want/dont want you to do.

It really opened my eyes

>>689563270
save some money from every paycheck

don't be stupid

Really good book called "Richest Man in Babylon," check it out

Never trust a fart

>>689563270
sauce

>>689565496
Very accurate anon btw very underrated thread.

suicide is a very permanent solution to a non-permanent situation, suicide will never be the answer

>>689563270
Never give up in your dreams.

>>689563270
sauce?

>>689565574
Idris Elba is great but he's black, can't be Bond.
Back to the shed with you

>>689565986
Says the person who hasn't seen the fact that there are two women potentially running for 007

Looks like you're in the shed, eh?

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DEUS VULT

Don't sneeze while you piss.

>>689563270
Sauce on girl?

When asking for help, never ask out of pity or telling them how loyal you have been, instead offer a deal or some kind reward for the help...

2 things: just because you can buy something doesn't mean you can afford it and "not my circus not my monkeys" I.e. don't fuck with things you don't need to fuck with.

Don't go cheap on shoes or mattresses. These are the two things you are going to spent most of your life in.

My grandfather always said "Don't get married and don't have no kids"

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>>689566133
Fuck off coon

My dad told me this:

1. Get quick bj so you won't come too quick later

2. Immediately after cumming, dive on tits, be gentle, spend at least a few minutes there.

3. Gently touch Pussy occasionally during titlicking.

4. Go down, tease, lick, such, get her close to cumming.

5. By now your dick's hard again.

6. Try for simultaneously mutual orgasm.

Marry whichever one of them you want 'cause there WILL be a lot to choose from once word gets around.

>>689566781
>nice damage control r e t a r d

>>689565452
the time james bond is black, is the time il start ethnic cleansing

>>689567101
You dad sounds like a creepy cunt

>>689566736
The fuck with these faggots constantly telling people to bring shit heads into this world for... Kids are complete waste of your precious time resources and experience, the only thing they add is you're pre programmed brain feeling like you have a purpose, but if you actually make real life goals I don't see a single reason why anyone would wanna deal with these shit heads

>>689567282
I agree, I'm in my 30's and all my friends that have kids are like empty versions of the people they used to be. No joy or personality left just constant talk about their smelly fucking kids.

Also, when a man touches a women, he should do so half as hard as he touches himself, and half as fast. The opposite is true for women touching men. Twice as hard and twice as fast.

kill myself

>>689567241
He was a true swordsman and thanks to him, so am I.

>>689563270
Nobody knows everything

If you never make a mistake you never do anything (work related)

>>689567871
Did he practice on you anon

Do less

>>689564054
It's not who you know but who knows you.

rome wasnt built in a year

>>689567871
you both sound like kid touchers now

>>689563270
>>>689567871
>Did he practice on you anon
See, this is what's wrong with you kids. I just made you all sexual tyranusauruses, and you pop off like a little bit helps.

Just thank me.

>>689563270
All hustle, no love

>>689563270
>>>689563270
>>>>689567871
>>Did he practice on you anon
>See, this is what's wrong with you kids. I just made you all sexual tyranusauruses, and you pop off like a little bit helps.
>
>Just thank me.
*bitch

>>689563270
don't get married.

dont stick yer fingers anyware you wouldnt stick yer dick.

never trust a bitch

>>689563270
"never stick your dick in crazy."

>>689567450
My children steered me away from drug addiction. So my false sense of purpose i derive from them actually saved my life. They also caused me to get off my ass and pursue my dreams. Ive never had more money/time and not only that but they look and act exactly like me. Hope they dont become addicts too.

Be excellent to eachother, and party on dudes.

>>689569137
Station.

Kill em all and let God sort them out.

Save your fucking money and invest it once you have a decent amount.
Wish I had taken this advice earlier in life instead of spending it all at the bars when I turned 21. Would have a good 40k saved by now.

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>>689569406

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A person with Narcissism or Histronic will FAKE an entire relationship. Some people have no empathy and will manipulate an entire relationship. ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS. They say the love you while actively working to destroy you.

>>689563270
love yourself

>>689569522
Very true. Been with the same broad for 12 years and i love as much todayas i did then (not at all)

people who drink or injure themselves in response to sadness or tragedy are weak idiots looking for someone to say "oh what a tragic figure they must be, what a romantic idea!"

Seriously. When I heard that I started seeing these people drinking because they had gf issues as attention seeking retards. Maybe some of them really do need help but most of them are just saying "look at me look at me"

>>689569871
>broad
>12 years
I think you mean 120, dick tracy

jesus christ

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>>689568308
I appreciate it anon

>>689567101
Like anyone does that. Get stuck in, have on your mind you are going to fuck all night. Squirt cock milk sooner than you wanted but feel great, make excuse and go to kip

>>689563270
Mine was: " Always give sauce with webm"

>>689567101
who the hell gets hard by licking a pussy?

There are vids on youtube of college professors teaching you how to upgrade your study skills so you ace college. There are other resources on top of this online that teach how to learn fast and effectively.

Combine this knowledge with the knowledge of optimizing your diet and lifestye for your brains health so your brain functions as effectively as it can. There are books on that as well.

If you do that then you will learn faster and better than most of your peers and you won't struggle very much in school. You can use this to take any course you want to take that would give you a huge raise and promotion at your job.

The second and more valuable advice is this. Make GOD and doing what you should do to get into heaven a top priority in your life.

There is nothing, and I repeat, NOTHING scarier than laying on your death bed feeling like you did not do enough right in your life to go to heaven. Do everything you can in your life to keep this situation from happening to you.

>>689563270
a mouth is a mouth

>>689563270
i dont know if its the best, but the only one i can think of right now is i was told by my kung fu teacher that all of our hang-ups, complex's and personality problems people have are inherited from our parents. both nature and nurture. and at the time it really resonated with me cause i could see that in myself and my friends

but now i see it works both ways, everything good about me i owe to my upbringing and the love and influence of my family

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5rnq9R9xjc

>>689571011
your gay is showing

>>689563270
>>689563270

while skiing, visualise in your head that your feet are flat in your boot.

really helped me progress. one of those light bulb moments.

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>>689571011

>>689563270
"don't touch that.. it's hot"
"never stick your dick in crazy, no matter how hot it looks"
"have a plan"

most of these came from my dad at one time or another.

>>689571011
can relate, eating pussy is definitely not my favorite sexual activity

theres some rotten ones out there and when you find em it turns off all excitement for future pussy eating

>>689563270
>>689563270
It's Joseline Kelly for anyone who wants sauce.

learn to use google niggers

dont trust people, except ur family

>>689565666
fucking check'd

>>689570294
Sauce?

>>689572007
my family is a fucking disgrace though how does that help?

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>keep your head down and your powder dry
>if it flies, floats, or fucks: rent it. it's cheaper in the long run
>If it's worth doing, it's worth doing right
>people will remember how you made them feel

thanks pop

"If you are trying to melt steel beams, do not use jet fuel."

>>689572305
No idea man
Been searching for the video for some time now

>>689572473
what do you mean by "keep your head down and your powder dry" sir?

>>689572473
>>if it flies floats or fucks

kek

>>689563270
if you dont get sex, get it somewhere else.

means if you have a bitch that tries to control you with the pussy, just fuck another pussy.

>>689572905
my dad told me that when I was bullied a lot in junior high. I never started any fights or gave anyone reason to hate me. But always be ready and able to fight for yourself if you need to.

>>689572943
WOW I TOTALLY DIDN'T UNDERSTAND THAT FIRST LINE THANKS FOR CLEARING IT UP FOR ME

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>>689563270
Don't drink bleach.

>>689573218

fuck.

>>689571082

>Make GOD and doing what you should do to get into heaven a top priority in your life.

I mean, be a good person, but if God is the kind of guy to go "eh, you ate meat on Friday during Lent, to Hell with you." then he can go fuck himself.

>>689563270
There was a thing I was watching, and it went like

A: "just send him out here so I can kick his ass"
B: "no."
A: just stands there getting mad that he didn't get his way for once
Just learn to say no.

>>689571815
>Joseline Kelly
GOD IS REAL

>>689563270
Always treat others like you want to be treated.

>>689563270
You can just as easily fail at what you don't want to do as you can what you want to do.

>show your six year old child a bucket of water
"Dip your finger in it"
>child dips his/her finger in the bucket
"Now take your finger out."
>child takes finger out
"See that tiny ripple? That's how much you matter. That's how much impact you'll make."

>>689566507
Thanks Jimmy.

>>689563270
"OP is a faggot" is the best advice ive heard

Face problems rationally and keep calm. Don't let your emotions control you, use them as input and motivation, but let your brain make the decisions.

>>689563270
>what's the best advice you have ever received or heard?
Relax.

>>689574030
is your dad some kind of edgelord Jeff Goldblum hybrid?

>>689569522
I see you've met my first wife. Quite the cunt, let me tell you.

>anyone can die for a cause, but it takes a real man to live for one.
Heard this when I was younger, it makes sense though in its own way.

>>689571011
Heterosexual males of breeding age and over. You'll find out one day, unless the gay is really wedged in there, then it's just getting hard to sucking cock for you I'm afraid.

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Stop wasting your life fucking around the Internet and playing video games.

Find yourself a girlfriend; she doesn't have to be great looking. Travel together and get married.

>Crazy people think of ways to do large feats, inspiring people go out and attempt large feats.
Who wants to be normal? Being normal doesn't get you a star on the walk of fame, fuck being normal, normal people are dumb and lazy.

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>>689574421
Hey fuck you faggot. My dad's fucking awesome and can beat the fucking fuck out of your fucking dad, you fucking fucker.

>>689575264
>Stop wasting your life fucking around the Internet and playing video games.
Good advice

>Find yourself a girlfriend; she doesn't have to be great looking. Travel together and get married.
No. Women are a drain on your individualism and should be treated as the emotional parasites they are.

i wish this thread will never end..

>stop looking for a 10/10 girlfriend
>you're not 10/10
>you're fucking barely 6/10
>seriously bro
>you need to start aiming for a 5/10 girlfriend
i would still be a virgin if it weren't for this advice

>>689575702
>had one girlfriend who wanted money
ALL WOMEN ARE WHORES EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM THERE IS NO EXCEPTION WHY AM I SO LONELY PEOPLE WILL RESPECT ME WHEN I GET A FEDORA

>>689563270
pull out.

>>689575264
Not all people want to travel and get hitched anon, personally I'm working on creating a company as soon as I graduate college. This company is going to be very large one day down the road, and with enough diligence will help to change the world for the better and provide opportunities for people to better themselves if they should choose to. I'm very dedicated to bettering myself and simply don't wish to complex things with a relationship in my life right now. But that's my personal goals, for most people getting hitched is cool but not thought out well enough, hence the modern day divorce rate.

' your time will come, and the wisest of us knows not how soon' or some such thing.
Do unto others etc.
Never trust a dog to guard your dinner.
Don't run with scissors.
Never eat snow with piss in it.
Expect the worst, prepare for the worst, accept the worst. It's probably your fault it wasn't better.
Don't be so gay.
Mind your P's and Q's.

"If you ever meet a group of girls and you're gonna fuck one, spend your night trying it with the girl in white pants. She's not on her period." --thanks grandpa

>>689576279
That's horrible advice, go for 10/10 but limit it to just hooking up or being friends until you find one that's actually a good person for you. And yes they do exist, just because she's not a 10/10 doesn't mean she's automatically a better person for you, don't limit yourself.

But at the same time confront them face to face and don't be an autist, who cares what they think of you? Do whatever you feel like doing, people find confidence in that.

>>689576853
Girls on blob are usually horny as fuck. My Mrs gets all deep throat cock sucky, at random times and places, when she's got the painters in.

>>689575264
this. our purpose in life is to procreate. only an asshat would say differently

>>689576294
>Emotional parasites
>Wanted money
Basic reading comprehension is not one of your skills.

>>689565690
That's a good one

>>689563270
SAUCE SAUCE SAUCE SAUCE SAUCE NEED NOW PLS HELP

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>>689563270
>You want fries with that?

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I was blind until I read this.

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>>689563270

If it doesn't seem completely insane, it's usually not worth doing

>>689576279
seriously. I see all these insane posts on 4chan about women who don't comply with everyone's embarrassingly retarded standards and I think how fucking monstrously fat they must be and the balls they have to complain if a woman is slightly chubby.

be happy with what you have and don't spend time thinking about what you don't have

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>>689577486

>>689563270
Don't eat rice unless you r asian

>>689577395
nice use of an old stale retort. "hurr that's not at all what I said you're clearly retarded this is bait and I for one will not fall for it"

Don't need a saw to cut through flowers.

>>689577152
There's more meaning to life than fucking, fighting, killing and consuming anon. Of course it all depends on what you choose to believe, but if you choose to believe you were only meant to pop kids out then you are limiting yourself. Why would you want to be the guy in the grocery store with 5 kids? That's absurd, go adopt some kids if you want children, you'll be helping to save some lives in the process.

>>689565837
The Total Money Makeover is good too

>>689563270
All girls are the same in the dark

>>689563270
Sometimes the best way to solve your own problems is to help someone else.

And
You will find that if you look for the light, you can often find it. But if you look for the dark, that is all you will ever see.

>>689571082
>Make GOD and doing what you should do to get into heaven a top priority in your life.

Don't listen to this tool.

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>>689577856
>confusing meaning with purpose
You idiot. Life is meaningless, but it has a purpose: to survive through procreation.

"You have no parenting assignment for you significant other."
and
"It is ok to relate to someone or understand their motive and still leave them."

>>689577719
Nice attempt at damage control.

>>689576279
I needed to hear this in High School.

>>689563270
OP you fucking mongoloid. Could you please give us sauce?

>>689578404
keep screaming about women being whores, have fun masturbating until the day you lose the ability to get an erection.

>>689563270
It gets better

>>689575264
good advice

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pic related literally changed my life.

Don't stick your dick in crazy.

I've never been good at following good advice.

>>689575702
You must be a weak ass virgin to have your individualism drained by being with another person.

>>689578787
You're still referring to points I didn't make.

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>>689563270

>>689563270
>AUTISTIC LEVEL FILENAME
check

Don't take anyone's shit
The only one who decides what you become is you
Anything can come to you with hard work

Best advice ever received by me was
"don't even think about it" directly followed by "just do whatever"

>>689578274
>Implying there is a difference between meaning and purpose
If I were to say that the purpose of life is to explore the universe and colonize each planet we come across, then there is meaning in that. The meaning to life is whatever each person chooses to believe, if we go by your rhetoric then we limit ourselves and do the same thing people have been doing since the dawn of man. Which is fighting, fucking, killing and consuming. Learn to appreciate life anon, it can be a good thing.

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>>689579269
your original post is just the same old song millions of butthurt fedoras have been singing for many years- and I'm making fun of you for it.

>>689579786
There is no meaning to life. You can however give meaning to YOUR life.

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Honestly/b/ does give out some great advice sometimes. This isn't the best, but one of my favs

when picking up your date, lock your car doors, once your date walks over open her door with the key and walk round the back of the car, if she opens your side stay with her, if she stays still and makes you open it, get rid, its just the very tip of a very selfish iceberg

>>689579316
That's a good wisdom.

>>689564505
Can confirm at least 1 and 3

>>689579754
>The smart man uses his mind to achieve success
>The passionate man uses his heart to acheive his ambitions
>The wise man uses both to shape his reality as he sees fit

>>689580066
Dubs of good advice confirm

>>689579943
Don't bother arguing with the village idiot.

>>689563270
If you're not cheating, you're not trying.
J. Bullard
BGEN
USMC

>>689563270
never trust jews

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>>689563270

>>689579943
So what you're saying is if I help a community to think outside the box and bring meaning to their own lives individually, the collective community can't say that theres meaning to life? Who are you to say there's no meaning to life?

>>689572618
Her tumblr is I-hate-the-beach
From there you can probably find some videos

My father always said.
Remember to pull out son.

>>689580074
Thats from the outsiders and was fillmed in my home town anon, very good advice

>>689565868
who told you this?

>>689567282
Uh maybe cause kids are the future of the species? What the fuck kind of question is that? I get some people don't wanna have kids but if everyone was that way humanity wouldn't last very long, would it?
Fucking retard

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>>689563270
Tough titty said the kitty but the milk tastes good.

>>689563270
SAUCEEEE

>>689576279
nobody gave that advice growing up
>ugly nigger, always fucked 8, 9, 10s
>used to think I was like a 6 or 7
>with time realize lm actually like a 2
>low self steem, 0 confidence
>0 girls, 0 friends
fuck my life

>>689582293
It's also the end of the species considering all the negative effects of over population.

>>689571082
>buying books for advice
>believing in god and actually thinking there's an afterlife
God anon, you must be fucking stupid

Always eat yellow snow, it might be beer

>>689563270
People are shit. But does this allow you to be scum, too ?

You will not be rewarded for being honest, honourable and nice. Its a personal decisions and others maybe wont even notice it.

>>689572007
Fucking retard my family are a bunch of cunts who take advantage of me, the only person to graduate high school and have a job. They stole from me my whole life and it was only when my mom used my money for heroin that she later overdosed on and died that I got the fuck out of there

>>689567144
You might want to start it now, anon
>>689563270
Never get in the van unless they show you the candy first

>>689581087
Her cam name is Kitten_Sophie

"Switch to apple products."

>>689563270

Kill the dogs first.

"Drink a little, feel the alchohol - then drink some more" Is the best I heard in some time. Follow that advice and blackouts will never happen again.

Nobody has any sauce? Name?

>>689575702
It depends on if they are or not.

>>689563270
No sauce?

>>689585122
Literally first result with image search

L is best

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>>689568861
Same. Kids are actually awesome to have.

>>689585347
Idk how to reverse image search on mobile though

>>689585654
joseline kelly then

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If they're black , don't turn your back.

>>689563270
Wow this is a thread that's really insightful and reassuring.

Just want to say I love all you anons. Despite any adversity face, let us progress.

In college, an older friend once laid out a priority list for tackling courses. It was something like:

> a) Pass
> b) with good grades
> c) knowing what they're teaching you
> d) happy with what you've done
> a) always before b), because a degree is always better than no, or a delayed, degree
> b) always before c), because you get one shot at making a good impression, but you can always learn shit later on in life
> c) always before d), because your happiness doesn't put food on the table, but knowing something useful might.

I didn't take the advice to heart at the time because I was a little shit, but in hindsight it held up.

>>689578279
This is great advice.

>>689585787
Thanks a lot

>>689586484
No problem Anon.

>>689567101
This is good advice don't listen to the faggots