Dashiki over on penetration ave

>>689124732
Her name is Claire. I miss her.

>>689124732
Sarah, i've never even spoken too her
>:^(

my mom

>>689124933

Yup. Fucking Melissa. Couldn't wait six more months for me to move, started seeing another guy. Meanwhile I'm changing everything in my life for her.

On the upside of things, pretty much the day she let me know (via text message, the cunt couldn't even answer my call or call me) I ran into an old friend and we hit it off strong. She might be a rebound, but we're having a really good time.

I might kill myself to this song tomorrow, you should understand.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UOyhwBHMgKA

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>>689124893

Ah, so true isn't it...

>>689125145
Dude just reading that made me feel like shit

>>689124732
Sarah.

>>689124732
Mimi. She moved out of city recently to get away from her meth-smoking dad, but she's still shooting heroin down there and I can't stop her. Sucks to fall in love with someone who is on such a destructive path that I know I can't pursue it. I've tried a million ways to help her and get her to understand how powerful a feeling can be when directed correctly, especially cause the feeling is mutual, but no matter how much she loves me she can't love me more than heroin. Fuck.

>>689124732
Rebecca. first girl name that popped into my head. Has no significant value

Hillary

Michelle

Mom

Jacob

>>689124732
Death. I just want death...

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>>689124732
Emily. We were decent friends in HS, she's still there and I just graduated. She has this asshole boyfriend who treats her like shit, and her parents are divorced and both assholes as well. I'm worried about her.

Lida

Her name's Brooke... sure i dont even cross her mind anymore.

Her name is Felissa she killed herself. . . Never can forget it
Just drink daily till i feel numb i hate my life its a mattr of time now

I need some advice
So basically, I've never had a girlfriend and I really want one. I have major anxiety issues and that prevents me from doing anything. The thought of scaring someone, getting rejected, creeping someone out, or just getting embarrassed terrifies me. So I end up doing nothing. My friend offered to take me to his homecoming to have my first kiss, and maybe get laid. But that alone scares me because of my anxiety. What do?

>>689130923
Don't just go get laid man. It'll feel like shit...you have to get out of your comfort zone and try. There is no other way. I understand your situation, but you have to push yourself.

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>>689130923
Listen man, im an introvert and hella fuckign awkward but just man up and just say fuck it. Its hella fun when yu finally say fuck it.
Its fun when you just let go.
I have literally drank myself yo the point where i almst die because of an EX AND I STILL DONT REGRET ANYTHINT.
>caps lock sorry

>>689124732
Madison, Broke up with her over the summer, because long distance. I regret it every day I see her with her boyfriend

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>>689124732
Alyssa.........Thank you for continuing to talk to me even after our separation and my density to both your and my feelings.

>>689124732
Her name was Ashley she took my boys and left without a second thought not a day Goes by that I don't think about her and the boys

>>689124732
Sierra. Helped me actually not go through suicide. We used to talk a lot. I still have her on snapchat, but I just cant talk to her for some reason. I know, beta af, but i dunno.

>>689132505
The boys being your testicles or your children?

>>689132642
Man up anon, maybe she's going through the same shit

>>689132867
She used to go to therapy for suicidal thoughts. Shes out of it now, but she has her own friends and goals and I feel I'd drag her down. She's so happy in her snapchat story. I feel it's a shame to ruin. If I love her, I should want nothing more than her to be happy.

>>689133475
How do you know that telling her how you feel will drag her down?

Whitley.

It's been almost ten years. She's done all the things we planned on doing, just with someone other than me.

At least she's happy, I guess.

>>689132777
Children my dear good sir 2 step sons and one of my own I was the only dad they really knew for 2 year>>689132777

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>be me
>twice in my short twenty three year life, I have let the women I love go
>used to feel bad
>now dont feel anything about anything
>they're both doing well I've heard

>>689133690
Shes having fun with her life at the moment, not a care in the world. Me just telling her that for the past 2 years I've loved her and how much shes done for me would just be a unnecessary complication to her one moment where she's happy.

>>689134231
I'm on my way there I'm sure I wish it could be different for everyone but in this world someone somewhere has to suffer for others to be happy

Jovanna. Damn I wish I could've done more. She was the flame the burned too bright and faded too soon. I miss her.

>>689134569
>unnecessary Complication
Anon how do you know that saying you love her will put a damper on her fun? You don't. You can't tell how she feels on the inside. Do it Anon. Prove yourself wrong.

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Here's one I never really got over,

>be me
>senior year, last play performance for the year
>letsgetfucked.bat
>girl I've like for the last 3 years is in the pit band with me
>solid 8/10 IMO. Shy and funny, but she's everything I wanted
>let's call her Alice
>I play tenor sax she's trumpet
>any way show is on Friday goes fine got through it no problem
>start packing up my shit and helping tearing down set
>everybody talking about how much shit there bringing to the after
>Alice is talking to this girl I'm good friends with
>she is inviting some guy she wants to hook up with to the party
>Iat this point I don't care w/e there's plenty of fish in the sea
>fast forward party's started, shits cash
>crush a six pack of tall boys in about 1 1/2 hours
>pretty well dickered sitting with two girls under each arm
>ones a good friend others some rando
>both no more then 7/10 but beer goggles mind you
>see Alice alone kinda looking sad
>get up leave my groupies behind to go see what's wrong
>"he said he'd come but he didn't and now I'm alone"
>or some shit I was pretty fucked to remember fine details
>go back and forth a while she starts to get closer
>the kitchen we we're in begins to empty
>she says she wants some privacy for us
>she starts going downstairs to a bed room say I'll be a sec
>find my buddy Jacob and explain the situation
>he was one of the few that knew I liked her
>he says he'll keep people out and what not
>I go down fool around for a good 2 hours I'd never forget
>no head but I settled for head, it was her first hook up after all
>shit gets a little choppy after that don't quite recall what I did when we finished
>some how road 2 trains, a bus, and walked 2k to my moms out side the city where the party was
>wake upon the best mood I'd been in to this day
>some how in the mix of things I got her number and I was trying to work out what I wanted to say
>before I decide get a call from Jacob
>"yo wudda do"
One sec I'll cont I guess

holy fucking shit, that's pathetic. let 'em go. this road leads to nowhere.

>>689134703
Actually, I guess I lied. I am kinda glad they're both doing fine. Don't worry anon, you really do learn to become numb to it all. Even then, there will still be moments in your life that bring back a spark that used to be a fire. Makes you appreciate the little things because you know how soon everything fades. Good times and bad times, they all fade.

>>689135187
I'll try, its always worth a shot if you put it like that i guess. it's late now, shes not awake. I'll tell her in the morning and see what happens. Thanks anon, i don't know you or your story, but thank you.

>>689124732
Her name was Cheshire, my first love and first to cuck me over.

Julia. Wish we could've gotten it together but I hear she's pretty damn happy now so I honestly can't complain. Glad I didn't fuck her up emotionally.

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>>689135238

talk about last night and as I say how happy I was with Alice he stops me
>"listen anon... Some shit happened between me and Alice"
>shit nigga what
>in his words "she found me on my way out the door started hooking up with me and I took he home."
I wish I was making this up
>I don't even know what to say.
>he says he doesn't like her and that it was the alcohols fault
>say OK and he promises to help me get her
>all of this was very sincere when he told me
>fast forward I realize why I should stuck to parties when it comes to girls
>can't text worth shit
>out of town can't invite her out
>by the time I'm back in town I get the news
>Jacob started dating her
>my female buddy who is friends with Alice tells me what she said about me
>"anons a great guy just I've got other stuff going on right now"
>life kinda spiraled down for me after that
>refused to go out
>no motivation to do anything
>finals where coming up but I didn't care
>eventually catch wind that Jacob and Alice split
>but It was already over for me when it started
>never talks to me at school or in class again
>events where we are together are awkward despite my best efforts
>eventually we'd graduate and I haven't seen her since for the last 10 years
>still think back to that night and the painful months that fallowed it
>engaged to my soon to be wife but I'll never forget her
>She left a special hole in my heart and no matter what girl I have or have gotten I'll never be able to forget her, my first real love

Sorry for long lost and shit quality I just got home from a even and I'm still pretty well dickerd hope you didn't hate it too much anons
but don't let one girl get you down, I wasn't happy then and I wanted to an hero but I'm happy now that I stayed along for life's crazy ride.

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>>689131389

My mom.

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Ironiclly her name is Hope and I am human trash for having cheated on her in the first place for pussy that wasn't worth it. Suicide is the only cure for being human garbage.

Why do you keep living?

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>you'll never wake up with her in your arms

Maria and Courtney.

They just played around with me, complete waste of time.

I'll get my revenge though.

In due time, for all the people that have fucked me over.

>>689124732
That nurse who grabbed my junk and told me to cough

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>>689136287
Because even though I have no reason to stay alive, I have no reason to die either, so I just keep living.

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>>689136715

I miss the all day sex thing. ok personally kinda boring

>be me
>be in 10th grade(I live in Canada where High School is grade 10-12)
> Join school band
> Play bass clarinet
>recognize a few people from middle school band
>One of them is Brooke, she plays clarinet
> I remember Brooke
> See Kyla
> Kyla plays the flute
> 10/10.png
> become infatuated with Kyla
> Think about her every day
> say nothing
> be in 11th grade
> still obsessed with Kyla
> decide to be her friend
> become good friends with Kyla and Brooke
> be in 12th grade
> Hang out with Kyla at lunch every day
>have school band trip
> Hanging out with Kyla during dinner
> She brings up her boyfriend
> mfw
>do nothing
> be last day of school
> say goodbye to all my friends
> Kyla never had any idea
> Move away to go to college
> browse /b/
> write this

>>689137383
wow man u gotta get what u want nigga

It's alexandra. I just wish she knew, I'm somewhat friends with her. She doesn't have a boyfriend so she is free I guess but still. I don't know her well enough personally to try to do or say something. She's fucking beautiful to me, I want her. Everything about her is amazing, maybe one day I'll say something. All I can is hope for it

>>689137683
I would've, but I'm very shy, especially around the concept of relationships

I wish I had a friend that had no other friends so I could keep them all to myself and they could cling onto me.

That chick I knew with lips and a pulse

>>689137858
Hoping doesn't get you anywhere. You need to start somewhere, ask for her number. After a little while tell her how you feel

>>689137887
sometimes its not that serious fuck for a while and have a good times together

Getting close to killing myself. I want to get into contact with her one last time first, but if it doesn't happen soon I'm just going to do it. Maybe leave her a note.

She was unbelievable. I was a loser all my life. Like in the running for least popular kid in school. In elementary the kids would say I had "anon-germs" and would like say anyone who touched my desk or anything had them.

But she was beautiful. She had a perfect face and a perfect body. She was into me. She laughed at my jokes. She gave me that smile that just melted my heart. She told me that she wanted to sleep with me in my bed. The first time I was too scared. Surely she was just afraid of sleeping alone. She couldn't be attracted to me. It would be a year before it happened again. It was amazing. No penetration, but omg. A couple weeks later I lost my virginity to her. I was 21. She was experienced.

She cheated on me. Broke my heart. Two years later we met up again. We slept in the same bed. She touched me all over and it was like heaven. We continued hanging out for about a year... not very often, but when we did it was great. Then she started dating this guy. It's been nearly a year since we've talked.

I just want to let her know how I feel and then kill myself. But really, I'm not sure it matters.

>>689138249
Yea you're right, I just need to stop fooling myself. I usually don't spill my spaghetti around grills but if it's someone I'm falling for hard then I might as well spill actual spaghetti. Next time I see I'll try and see what I can make happen, that's if I don't fuck it up

>>689138619
TLDR , jus dun kil self over vag fagit

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his name was Lionel

we were good friends
I fell in love with him when we were 14

he was different...I felt happy and content hanging out with him.

came out to him, whole school knew, he basically flipped out....I dont blame him.

even though he treated me badly after, I will always have feelings for him...you never forget your 1st real love.

he did buy me a cap for my birthday, still have it to this day 10 years on.

>>689135238
>>689136090

i feel you /b/ro, something similar happend to me..

>>689138933
Kek did u try to stick yur peenie weeeeeenie in his butthole?

>>689138619
Look anon, she's not going to reach out to you, you have to pull yourself together and say that to her. Nothing will ever happen and you'll die a meaningless death afterwards

>>689138920
Not killing myself over a girl. I didn't mean for it to sound that way. Killing myself. Would like to have a final goodbye with the only person who made me happy.

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how bout some shit that happened today
>helping aunt clear out old house to move
>get to my mom's old room
>decide to check out her closet hoping i could find some of my old baby stuff
>find a birth certificate for someone named andrew, born 5 years before me, clipped to a picture of my mom holding a blonde baby
>show it to aunt
>says she had no idea she had someone before me and thought i was her firstborn
>she helps me look through it, finds some more pictures, a stuffed bear with his name written on it, and a death certificate dating 2 months before i was born
>doesnt even say where he was buried at
>mfw i had an older brother that died when he was 5 and his own family never knew he even existed
>tl;dr had an older brother who died when he was 5 and was erased from history

>>689124732

Mom.

>>689139082
haha holy shit, why did this make me laugh so much, i needed that

Everyone I had feelings for in HS has either moved away or lost contact with me. I'm now 20 years old, single, no goals in life, and unemployed. I'm seriously contemplating suicide.

Nearly died, had massive asthmatic attack, passed out on phone to emergency services... Woke up in hospital.... Spent 4 weeks in hospital, fuck u pussies I survived!

>>689139491
Anon, you need to go to college. Go for a decent area like engineering or general science. It will help you meet people and give you a goal to strive towards.

>>689139082
it wasnt for sex, no.

>>689139245
Thing is she blocked me on facebook. That's the only way I had to contact her. Several months ago I messaged her sister on facebook (I knew her sister through her, her and her sister were hanging out at my place, her sister left her phone charger here, I used that as an opening, asking of she wanted it) and asked her to tell her sister that I'd like to talk to her (at the time I thought she had deactivated her facebook account, which she's done many times over the years. Only recently did I find out that I was blocked). So I don't really have any good way of reaching out to her. Her boyfriend is in a band and I could go to one of his shows and see her there, but that doesn't sound like the best idea. A month ago I was walking past a bar and heard her boyfriend singing... it was hard knowing she was likely inside, I could go talk to her...

>>689138933
Oh god I'm in almost the same situation currently. I haven't told him though. He's bi, but has a girlfriend who he'd never leave... Everyone sees them as the perfect, flawless couple, and they are... Besides, he'd never love me anyways...

>>689138486
Kyla thread cont.
> Be me
> be summer
> playing World of Tanks on my shitty laptop
> 30fps ftw
> get text
> from Kyla
> holyshit.gif
> talk back and forth about summer and shit
> say nothing about my obsession
> too shy
> feel great when conversation is over
> fast forward
> my 18th birthday
> order pizza
> play World of Tanks by myself
> I'm now an 18 year-old hugless, kissless, handholdless, forever-alone virgin.
>fast forward
>Christmas
> get text from Kyla
> she says merry christmas
> I say the same
> fast forward
> June 6th
> Kyla's birthday
> I wish her happy birthday
> She says "Thanks Anon! That's sweet of you."
> heartmelts.gif
> Fast forward
>now
> I write this

>>689140080
You could but at this point anon it's too far, you have to find someone else. There are 7.6 Billion people on this earth. There's going to be at least one who will love you unconditionally.

>>689140367
whatever happens, happens.....

logically i would advise you to get over the crush. But feelings are never logical.

>>689140536
You still have a chance anon. Message her in the morning and tell her how you feel.

>>689124732
I started self harming in high school to deal with my lack of being able to deal with strong emotion. It got a lot worse after that when I got into a high-stress job, but in the last couple months I've tried very hard to stop.
My best friend is sleeping, I'm drunk, and that's all I want to do. I don't want to die, I just want to smash down all this emotion that I have.
I think the issue is that I've never seen a problem with self harm. It's like smoking and drinking, just a coping mechanism.
I guess I'm just trying to find a reason to not do it tonight. A couple months ago I pretty much removed any way to hurt myself from my home, but I bought a couple of paring knives the other day.
I knew it was a bad idea, and I guess I knew what my intentions were.
Other than my SO finding out how bad it is, I have no reason to not do it.. How do my fellow self harmers stop themselves?

>>689140634
You're missing the point. I'm killing myself. There's no "maybe". There's no finding another girl. I am killing myself. The only question is do I say goodbye. If I hadn't met her there'd be no one to say goodbye to and no question. If I currently had a girlfriend who I loved then I'd say goodbye to her.

You seem to think that I want to find someone. I don't. That doesn't make sense. I'm killing myself. Soon. Why try to form a new relationship? I don't see the purpose. I might kill myself next weekend. Even if I met her tomorrow, that's a one week relationship we're talking about.

>>689138699
Before I cry myself to sleep I'm just gonna say this as if she's gonna read it. And if you ask why, it's because I'm a raging faggot.

I love you alexandra, I wanna be with you. I know we don't talk much and that we're not exactly great friends but please know that I care for you. We both have had our struggles and we both need someone. Please let that someone be me. Your a beautiful strong woman, I wish you could read this. I love you alexandra, just know that I'm watching and that I care. I'm just too scared to do shit. At least for now. Take care alexandra

>>689140961
>Go to bathroom
>Look in Mirror
>Ask yourself "Do I want to destroy what someone loves?"
>Sleep

>>689141179
Say that to her, exactly that.

>>689124732
jokes on you, i already thought about her, even after so many years

>>689140961
>How do my fellow self harmers stop themselves?

It hasn't crossed my mind to do it again for years. Shame is a big motivation, but also I've gotten better at learning to redirect that sadness to coping mechanisms that don't harm me physically.

meditating, hot baths, emotional music, sad movies, violent video games, etc..

>>689140843
I'm not sure, something like that is completely uncharacteristic of me. I'm known for being savage af and having 0 empathy.

>>689124732
nora

>>689141172
Can you at least explain why?

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Hey guys, I'm going on probably my first date on Tuesday, and am planning to give her a mixtape/CD. Sounds faggoty, I know, but I love music and so does she. She told me her favorite group was the Rascal Flatts (don't like country that much) so I had to work around them. Any tips?
Here's what I have so far, gonna add a few more. Last one is Walk the Line, Johnny Cash. Couldn't fit in the screenshot. Thank you lads.

This chick Halee

If she'd give me a proper chance I'd rock her lil world but she's in 7 bands (most are shit) and she thinks she's that because she backs lounge rock on bass and drums.

Both annoyed and crushing. God damn you Halee

>>689124732

There is no her.

>>689141395
I used to cut. Last time was in May 2010. I needed stitches. I decided that I would never cut again. It wasn't difficult to stop.

>>689141456
Well then it'll catch her off guard. It's even better.

>>689141495
BTW the Rascal Flatts song is acoustic so it blends with the Nirvana unplugged and Johnny.

>>689124732
Xiao. She won't talk to me anymore.
>:^(

>>689140536
just be like we should date or pull ur dick out when u see her.no matter what happens ur out the friend zone

>>689141743
)^:

>>689141615
It is really addicting.

I feel deep, deep shame because of the scars on my left arm. I always hide my arm, either physically or with a jacket or longsleeve.

I can't do it again because I can't deal with the repercussions of having yet another scar as a permanent reminder.

>>689124732
Julieta

>>689141204
I didn't even need to look in the fucking mirror.
That hurt so much to read, but was also so beneficial. I don't think anything I've seen has given me such a strong emotional reaction in a long time.
I may not give a damn about myself, but other people do and that's a good reason not to.
My friend told me he hurt himself recently... I didn't have the guts to tell him that I have too, he knows I've done it but I was so scared to even show for a second that I've been recently weak.
I'm so fucking scared to show anyone that I'm not okay. I've spent my whole life pretending I'm okay, I don't know how to do anything else.

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Christina Grimmie :,(

>>689141495
Dude. Rascal flats are the worst group of all time.

End it. End it now.

I kid, throw some Willie Nelson from red headed stranger, maybe that song Dixieland delight by Alabama but the reality is rascal flats aren't country music. It's shit tier pop with a lil slide guitar in the mix and "country " accents singing

Dudes are probably from Connecticut.

Merle, willie, Hank senior, cash. And then throw like... green sky blue grass, or other indie folk influenced shit.

Just know she might have zero taste

>>689141395
I haven't found anything that helps, usually in minor upsets music helps.
Otherwise it just annoys me. The closest I can get to an alternative is Hsiang a rubber band

>>689141473
It would be like ten thousand words to give a good explanation. Short version: I have mental issues. I hate this world. I don't want to stop hating the world, even if it were possible through drugs or therapy. The idea of being okay with the world sounds like a horror film plot.

I cannot change the world, and trying to would cause me great anxiety.

There's about a dozen reasons why I want to kill myself. But hating the world is the biggest and most impossible to fix.

Oh, and whenever I say that I hate the world people assume they know why. They never do. I'm not going to explain why. You wouldn't understand anyway.

>>689142037
That's also the purpose of the mix. Kinda wanna show her some good music that I know and love. Was definitely thinking Willie could be a good option, as well as Stevie Ray Vaughn.

Dani...

>>689141994
You need to tell him. Find your best friend. Tell them everything. It'll hurt before it gets better

>>689141938
I only cut my ankles. I thought of them like hidden wrists.

>>689142354
>You wouldn't understand anyway
Help me to.

>>689124732
Sandra

I regret pushing that bitch away

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>>689124732
Her name is Tara. She has been there for me for years, and naturally as the lonely person I am, I eventually fell for her, even knowing she would never like someone like me. She could do so much better than me, so no surprise when I told her about my feelings she didn't feel the same way.

The worst part about it is that its not just her, I feel like any girl I gain feelings for could do better than me, there is nothing special about me. I couldn't imagine a girl even being interested in me. Whatever.

Also, do you guys want me to dump my folder?

Ramona Flowers

>>689142377
He knows. But he struggles with the same thing, and to be honest he has more of a reason to.
I have no reason to feel the way I do. He dealt with physical and emotion abuse his whole childhood, how the fuck can I rationalize putting my burdens on him while he's still struggling?
I feel like there's no way for me to have an outlet other than the self harm. I don't want to hurt anyone else with what I do to myself.

>>689142576
Go for it.
Also what you're feeling is insecurity. There are a lot of things you can do to fix everything you think is bad about yourself.

>>689142488
You wouldn't. It pains me to talk about and no one ever understands. Sometimes I say something ten times and it doesn't sink in. They suggest I do something that's exactly what I hate. Then I get "oh I didn't realize that's what you meant". It's complex and you'd just judge me if I told you. I'm going to bed. Will check again after I'm ready for bed.

>>689124776
thats impossibru

>>689142774
Tell the person who cares about you the most. Call your mom or dad, and tell them. It may be hard, really hard. But it might be worth it

>>689142895
Even if it doesn't sink in for me, I still want to know what caused your death. I want to know why I'll miss you.

>>689143076
You know, the thing is that I'm married. I did tell the person I cared about most.
But I didn't ever tell about how bad it was. And they wrote it off as being an emo bitch... So I never talked about it again. It hard to talk about it to people who don't understand.
My best friends knows. And I know he understands, but I just don't want him to be disappointed, and I don't want to hurt him with my problems.
I could never tell my parents, they're part of the reason I even do it in the first place.

>>689143480
Tell your spouse the entire truth. They'll understand, tell them you still might do it. The first part is telling them everything, the second is doing something about it

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>>689142884
I know I can, but I just don't feel motivated enough to even leave the house, let alone go to the gym. There are other problems too, but I always feel like I'm bitching about the dumbest shit when I say it out loud.

>>689143896
Why did you make this image about me? literally me

>>689143731
That's so goddamn scary man. I don't want them to know that I'm that weak, I don't want to hear the ultimatum that is get.
I've taken away nearly every other coping mechanism, I know I'd hear "if you do it again I'll leave."
I didn't tell them I even did it at all until a couple years in, and they just brushed it off.
Don't know if I can really handle that. I make myself an emotional dumping ground for everyone else, I almost wish I could do that to someone else for once.

>>689143896
What are they?
The gym problem can be fixed. The next time you're out, buy a few weights, and use them every time you're feeling lonely. It helps.

Her name is karen and I wish I would have kissed her in her car when she gave me the chance.

>>689143205
You won't even know I'm gone.

And it's sad to say that the person who means the most to me also will probably not even notice.

But if you're curious, if you can get the right answer to this question and think about the answer enough, you can figure it out. What's the worst thing that you can do to someone?

I am now going to bed.

Patty. I love you so much. The distance killed our relationship. You were my best friend and lover. It's hard to move on. You have no trouble with that yourself though. I'm such a fool.

>>689124732
Briel

>>689142354
Not that anon, but I'm curious, Curious George.
But seriously, I'm curious.

>>689144028
>If you do it again, I'll leave
What kind of bullshit is that? That sounds like someone who doesn't care.

Her name is Rae. We met at work when I was going through some major bullshit with my now ex gf. Literally 12 hours after I broke up with my ex I was in bed with rae. No sex sadly, but I'm a man that likes to fucking cuddle anyway so I'm not complaining. This VERY quickly became the norm. Literally in the last 3 weeks there's been like 4 days I've slept anywhere that wasn't with her. She's hands down the best woman I've ever known. What's fucked up is she won't date me at this point. Like the whole time she's had a thing for this other fucker. He's who she was having sex with because she prefers to only do that with one person at a time and that's fine. But she's told me several times that I'm someone she would date. Only problem is I'm enlisted in the Marine corps. I leave October 11th for basic training. She wants to find someone for the long run and I want someone to come home to. But she doesn't think she can be faithful while I'm gone. The other night we got drunk and finally had sex and she's quite literally the best I've ever had. Afterwards was when I finally got the full answer that if I weren't leaving she'd be with me. Tonight she's with the other fucker and I'm ready to fucking blow my brains out.

>>689124776
so cheesy. almost straight out of a hollywood movie

>>689144521
It's what I unfortunately expect from the person I'm married who I'm very sure doesn't understand the actions of someone who suppressed their emotions for their whole life.
Maybe they'd react differently, but that's about what I'd expect.

>>689125305
dude what the fuck. that was fucked up.

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Russian roulette is a fun game to play when you are depressed and lonely

>>689144707
Maybe it's time to seek therapy. If there is no other option, it's the only other way to be truly happy anon

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>>689144124
Waking up in the morning and wishing I hadn't

Knowing I'm the one that has to text first because no one thinks about texting me first.

Not being invited out with friends unless I'm the one planning it because I guess I'm not convenient enough, or maybe its just that its easy to forget about me.

Knowing just how lonely I am but yet still knowing how much pain would be caused if I left or ended my own life. It makes me feel trapped. I wouldn't be able to make my parents go through the same pain they went through when my sister passed away.
I just feel like I can't find any other meanings in my life other than just because suicide is selfish. Idk, I'm just being a bitch about imaginary problems. Whatever.

Gf of 5 years left me 2 month ago, been at the bottom of a bottle since, Loading pistol now

Bye /b/ros

Honestly....it's kinda nice to know I'm not alone in all this shit...thanks /b/

>>689145009
Don't

>>689144920
Maybe. I don't want to cry in front of a stranger, but I know I would if I tried to talk about it.
But I'm sure they see that stuff all the time...
And I don't want to be put into any kind of institution because of what I do to myself.

>>689144947
>Being a bitch about imaginary problems
You're problems are real. Plan as much shit as you can anon. Make them want to hang with you. Text first and often, don't get sad about being the first to text, they'll get used to it and text you back eventually

>>689124732
Fleur..

>>689145256
A good outlet would also be to work out if you truly don't think you can deal with therapy. Every time you want to hurt yourself, do 100 reps of a 10 pound weight. Eventually you might see good results and you will feel better about your life

>>689145256
I completely agree about not wanting to talk to a stranger about it. I wouldn't want to open up to a stranger thats getting paid to listen to me complain. But then again I don't see too much point in talking about my problems in the first place, I just get annoyed by a lot of the solutions people give.

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this...

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>>689144947

>>689125305

FUUUCK

>>689124732
Holly

>>689145191
you got an hour.

>>689145410
Hoer

>>689145621
Oh my god I had this a few weeks ago. It made me feel sick for the next few days because it felt so real, and it felt like actual love. It felt like someone actually cared about me and I cared about them too.

But of course it was too much to be true.

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roll

>>689145664
You fire that pistol you will never ever feel love. Even if you don't feel love now, who's to say you won't sometime in the future? Who's to say you won't wake up one day with a kid and happily married? Who's to say you won't be there for your kid's graduation? Who's to say no one will be there to cry at your funeral? Who's to say?

>>689145664
If I also tell you not to, will you stay longer?

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>be me
>attempt suicide
>fail
>fall in coma
>be in coma for 7 years
>wake up
>nothing is the same

>>689145543
That's not a bad idea. I'm a weak armed little person so that would probably help, maybe sit ups as well.
Thanks man, I appreciate it
>>689145559
The closest I can get to talking to a stranger about this stuff is here. I get what you mean about getting paid to listen to you complain... What kind of solutions do you get?

>>689145009
post pics after you're done!

>>689125581
Feelings.jpg
rip eyes ;(

>>689145621
I've had dreams like that. Weren't all that bad when I woke up, to be honest.

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>>689145622

>>689145987
You get a fresh start.

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Lana. She's on the left. It's been 12 years, and about 20 girls later, and no one has even come close to comparing to her.

>>689145899
PArents are dead, only sibling has terminal

She was the only thing keeping me going

Fbds. Fuck you, op.

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>>689124732

Julie. But she likes everything I dislike. She loves football, lives at a farm, doesnt want to move, only wants to live her life at one place, has a lot of dumb opinions and yet Im mad attracted to her

>>689146370
Do you want her to give up too? Live on knowing she's fighting to survive? Imagine her reaction when she finds out that her only sibling killed themselves and she has nothing left

Her name was Ajoke. AJ, for short.

Every time I think I'm over her, assholes and their feels threads, just have to drag all that shit to the surface again.

White guy dates attractive Nigerian woman, and she doesn't want a relationship. Thanks for that.

her name is julia ,she sleep with me last night but i didnt even touch her, now she left. feel sad and lonley.

>>689124732
Drumpfy

>>689146565
Shes already given up, she just wants to slip away but her husband is in denial and wont let her go

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>>689146174

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Don't even know her name. She hikes the same trail I do regularly. Actually, I only frequent it at the chance of seeing her again and again. We exchange flirty one-liners when we pass one another, as we start at opposite ends.

I'll never have the gall to ask her her name. She's the epitome of a 9/10 from head to toe. I've coined her Fox because she has a Basset Hound that she hikes with on and off and The Fox and the Hound was one of my favorite movies as a kid.

I don't know why I think about her so much, I have a handful of worthy options for pursuance... just feels pointless if someone like her is out there.

>>689145871
how do you restart your life, and what is the difference between 2 and 3? what about quads?

>>689147017
You know, I'm staring to find that no matter what, this place is always here for me.
Even when it's 3am and I've been crying, there is always some amount of compassion in this place.
Your /b/rothers are here for you.

>>689146980
Do you think she wants you to die too? You're parents will die in vain with both of their children dying too. You are the only hope. Live on. You parents didn't exactly raise you for nothing. Don't let it end because you thought you were alone.

>>689130923
Man you are focussing way to much on what other people think. Do what YOU want to do. Not everyone has to like you. Girls honestly like guys the most who dont give a fuck. Youll probably fuck up some times but it doesnt matter. It hurts alot less then never trying. And have fun, you should try to just have a good time

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>>689147017

>>689142774
You remind me of my friend Kat. Same fucking story.
But it feels alot better when you realize youre not alone.
It's hard to open up, but everything gets better after.

>>689124776
fucking amateurs. i drink AND smoke

>>689125633
Melissa sounds like a cunt. Glad you found someone else.

jannika...

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>>689147523

>>689124732
My Mandy, she changed so much while i was gone. The girl i loved isn't there anymore.

>>689147259
Same bro. Was just thinking the same thing. I'm here tearing myself apart over this girl thinking I'm totally alone...but I'm not. None of us are. It's pretty fuckin great honestly

>>689147344
It hurts when I see her, It hurts to know her life is counted in weeks. My parents died when I was 5 years old. I just want to see them again man.

>>689125581
>frank catches his fist
>death grip on fist, can't get out
>I'm going to help Anon with his weight
I really thought Frank was going to teach Anon martial arts.

chloe v.

>>689148015
They want to see you too. But with your arms around your spouse. And a kid you can be proud of.

>>689127401
>>689131943
i kinda relate, I'm here for you broseph

>>689147900
Other people's love is meaningless. The most important love is the love you have for yourself.

>>689147629
Also just finished reading everything,
sucks that you friend out who your
true friends are when you need them most.

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>>689130923
jump in eyes closed into the cold water, its the only way to get rid off anxiety.

i used to have terrible anxiety and couldnt do anything either. didnt leave the house in forever, and the mere thought of human contact was scary.

but then one day out of the fucking blue i decided to go out and do everything. i went to a bar, nervously ordered a drink and got fucking smashed. i embarassed the living shit out myself, but i felt so much better after that. then i did more and more stupid shit, and completely stopped caring what people thought of me.

Sure i might be a careless maniac now but at least life is 100x better

Emilia, Beautiful name

>>689146315
She sounds lovely but what is stopping you?

>>689139361
Well my birthday this year was interesting.
>Only 2 people that come visit are my mom and sister
>They stay for 10-15 minutes
>Give me whisky, cake and some other stuff that clearly shows they know nothing about me
>Bought me a card, but didn't have time to write anything on it
>So I get an empty card
>Some cake
>Some whisky
>Some meaningless gifts

The card jokingly said "I'm on a whisky diet". I never considered myself an alcoholic, I don't drink in excess (usually), and I'm only 19. The thing I find interesting about all of this is, I still can't care.

>>689124732
Simona

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>>689125623
This one always gets me.

Alyysa, shes 15 im 19. Most beautiful, quiet, smart, perfect girl but our age difference is just too edgy. Dont think itll ever work out.

>>689148196
She was the one man, I had the fucking ring in my pocket when she left me I wanted to have kids with her

>>689147629
I don't know if it really feels better. I wonder if I'm weaker for telling other people, I don't want my weakness to be detrimental to the people I care about.
Opening up after being told my whole life to shut it out and be submissive to my superiors makes it pretty difficult.
On the bright side, I just spent about ten minutes petting a stray friendly cat so I do feel better.