>sweet life of Zachary and Cody
>lube
>ball gag

Home improvement stores:
Gloves,zip ties,rope, and trashbags

.42 cal pistol
Pen
Price of paper

>Gallon of bleach
>Bone saw
>Shovel

Tournequet, sand paper, needles

>>688752104
Nothing you buy is going to freak out any cashier who has been working longer than 3 months, for it is a job that will murder your soul and shit on your face.

Needles
Condoms
Pizza

>Doughnuts
>Doughnut holes
>Glue

>2 washing clamps
>red lipstick
>polaroid camera

>>688753817
Kek

>>688753582
>Nothing you buy is going to freak out any cashier who has been working longer than 3 months, for it is a job that will murder your soul and shit on your face.

That may be, but I bet if you go through the checkout with;

>Donuts
>Donut holes
>Super glue

You'd at least get a chuckle.

>>688753817
Fuckin' beat me to it. Good form!
>>688754039

>>688752104
Every time this thread comes up people say needles/syringes. What fucking grocery store are you going to where you can buy those off the shelf???

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>vodka
>hand saw
>this book

Rope
Toy baby doll
Lube

>>688752104
>>688752298
>>688753703
>lube
>condoms

Boring

>>688753817
>repeating old shit

Also boring

>>688752943
That's 4 items idiot

>>688752104
Rope
Duck tape
Largest batch of quick kill, low odor raid bug bombs

>>688752104

>ducktape

>knife

>ski mask

>Holy Bible
>Condoms
>Zip Ties

>milk
>flour
>eggs

>3 gallons of ice cream
>5 chocolate bars
>Coke Zero

I hope they fucking freak

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>bagels
>bagel bites
>super glue

>>688754765
Someone already did this joke but with doughnuts, try being a little more original fag

Pokemon cards. Yugioh cards. Magic cards.

>lighter fluid
>wooden cross
>12 years a slave dvd

>Elmer's glue
>super glue
>pizza rolls

>>688752104
>Clothes hanger
>Baby doll toy or similar 9'yo shit
>Vaginal condom

>elmer's glue
>super glue
>wood glue

>pressure cooker
>nails
>camping fuel

>>688752104
Ball gag
BB gun
Life size barbie doll

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Laxatives
Ice cream
Birfday cake fo mah nigglets

>>688755278
ONLY THREE YOU PIECE OF SHIT

around halloween
>candy
>razor blades
>a mask

>>688752104
>Lighter fluid
>Matches
>Hefty garbage bags

>>688753582
Camping Mini-propane Tanks
Emergency Flares
Inconspicuous backpack

>Ballgag
>Lube
>Shrek 2

>>688755331
That is 3

>quran
>sandals
>a child

9th birthday candle
Lube
Condoms

>>688752104
>Sleeping pills.
>Sleeping pills.
>Sleeping pills.

Bonus points for the extra value packs.

>>688752104
Unlubricated condoms, rope, and a kids sing along cd

Shovel, lime, pregnancy test.

>lube
>little girls panties
>life size barbie doll

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>lube
>adult magazine
>this cactus

>>688753817
As old as the internet.

Walmart value sized vodka
Coat hangers
Pregnancy Test

>>688755537
gift wrap for lube and condoms required

Iodine tincture
Matchbooks
Pseudoephedrine

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duct tape
garbage bags
shovel

>>688752104
Diet coke
Mentos
Enema Kit

>"i'm sorry for your loss" card
>party poppers
>balloons

>>688752104
mayo
mayo
snorkel

>>688756179
Underrated

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Rope
Duct tape
Shotgun

>mfw you can buy guns in a supermarket in the US

>>688755777
Trips speak the truth.

∆
∆∆

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>>688753887
Clothespins? Or do you actually mean clamps? Post a pic plz

>A massive dildo
>An apple
>A sign reading "I am going to shove this massive dildo down the throat of the next cashier I see"

>>688756303
too bad i can never roll a decent roll

>>688753582
So much of this holy shit

Machete
Baby Alive Doll
Lube

Baseball bat
Icy hot
Condoms

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>>688756348
ultimate kek

>>688752104
Newborn diapers
Lube
Condoms

Plastic wrap
Duct tape
Vaseline

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Fish hooks, children's toys and hanger wire

Cucumber
Vaseline
Hammer

>>688752104
>Girl's panties, clearly identifiable (prints/girly colors)
>Lubricant
>A single flip-flop

> plunger
> beastie boys album
> lubricant

>candy bowl
>hole saw
>candy

Donuts
Superglue
Donut Holes

Coat Hanger
Lube
Bucket

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>>688756700
wtf is the hammer for

>>688756188
kek

>>688752104
Blue tarp
Saw
Bactine

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>>688756826

>>688756179
top fucking kek

>lighter
>rag
>alcohol

>>688752104
>lube
>banana
>pineapple

Bleach
Woodchipper
Value pack of zzzquill

>>688754722
You fucking psychopath

>Wooden spoon
>Hairbrush
>Book on parenting, focusing on discipline by a well known Christian author

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>>688756179
Best idea ever

>>688756861
Vaseline on cucumber
Tip of cucumber in hole
Hammer cucumber

A toilet seat
balloons
nail gun

>DVDs
>water balloons
>cocktail weiners

Plan-b
Hanger wire
Razor blades

Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare
E.T. The Game
Dennis the Menace Movies

>many live fish
>a few frogs
>blender

>>688752104
>butter
>butter
>i can't believe its not butter

or

>rope
>chair
>justin bieber's believe

>Burrito kit
>Rat poison
>Book by Donald Trump

>>688757180
people put cucumbers in their ass all the time without hammers. you take cucumber sized shits all the time without hammers.

ITT: everybody buys lube and something for children

>>688757439
small holes

Half a watermelon
Half a watermelon
Duct tape

>>688757409
>book by trump
>palette of bricks
>morter

>>688753071
> no bullets

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>>688757352

Adult diapers
Honey
My little Pony DVD

>>688757419
I think he means dick hole.

>>688757419
In hindsight, a zucchini would have been better. Or maybe a fire extinguisher or traffic cone.

>prepaid phone
>ski mask
>legos

>>688757419
Not your asshole, sweet summer child

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>>688756326

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>>688752104
I actually brought these to a pharmacy counter once.

> gallon of water
> monster energy drink
> hypodermic needles

I was doing an all nighter and my mother in law is diabetic. I was stoned as fuck and didn't realize how sketchy I looked until after I reached the register. Still don't go back to that store.

>>688752104
>dog leash
>dog collar
>lube

Lucky Charms
Cyanide
Digital Camera

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>>688757548

pregnancy test
coat hanger
hunting knife

1) Lube
2) Condoms
3) Picture of Justin Bieber

>Pair of girl's panties
>Clear glue (dispensed realistically into the panties, packet disguarded on shelf)
>Dance Moms DVD

ski mask
hunting knife
duffle bag

>peeled apple slices
>red paint
>tape

>>688757915
I know I don't go out very much, but do they sell pictures of Justin Bieber at convenience stores now?

>>688753071
42 cal....wut

>>688755333
Trips!

>Jason costume
>fake machete
>real machete

>>688754342
Then choose zip ties or rope shitbag xD

>>688758015
Top zozzle
It should have been glue tho

>>688757730
because a cashier ringing up a dick sized object and lube is going to assume its going anywhere but someones asshole.

>mother's day card
>chloroform
>butcher's knife

Fireworks
Duct Tape
Diapers

>>688754205
Underrated

>rope
>batman mask
>Bag of candy

the god damn snack man

One time I bought lube and some toaster strudels from a Walmart.

It was early in the morning, I was probably the first customer of the day for the cashier I went to. She was East Indian and looked horrified.

>Quran
>gun
>ammo

Get Well Soon Card
Pillow
Lube

>>688754342
I hate to encourage condescending assholes but this guy has a point. Everyone always says lube/condoms

>2 halfs of watermelon
>super glue

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>>688757766
>mfw murkans call washer clamps clothespins
>mfw murkans call spinny scrubbers washing machines
>mfw murkans call bumpy cloth slides wash boards
>mfw murkans call spinny air blasters clothes driers
>mfw murkans call dress gallows clothes lines

I worked at a gas station next to a motel just off the interstate. The night shift was a parade of weirdness.

A squirrelly looking old guy came in once, in a real hurry like. He stalked through the aisles on turbo-walk mode, then came up to the register with a jar of vaseline and package of toilet paper, then loudly demanded to know where our nudie mags were. When I told him we didn't have any he just left the shit on the counter and walked out without saying another word.

>muriatic acid
>sudafed
>baby food

>a bruised banana
>yellow paint
>???
>profit

>>688755574

kek

>>688758086

Magazine rack, Tiger Beat or some other such teeny bopper magazine.

>>688758665
>book on how to become wealthy ?

>>688754960
>>688755165
Yall are alright in my book. Sensiblechuckle.jpg

>Humidifier
>Dehumidifier

Baby Food
Rat Poison
Digital Camera

>>688758259
Underrated

>>688755453
I think the joke was that niglets are a purchase able good. But maybe that anon just can't count cause you're right that's three

>>688758529
>condoms
>rope
>book of funny things to take to a cashier

>dog leash
>dog collar
>hot dogs

>>688754722
Reported to mods and FBI. Have fun in the pokey, you sick bastard

>>688758259
>>chloroform
you can't buy chloroform
you have to make it

>>688759018
Yeah, you don't buy nigglets at a grocery store, you have to go out to the auction.>>688759018

>toilet seat
>super glue
>chocolate laxatives

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>alcohol
>a lot of alcohol
>this book

Why even have these threads? Everything is the same answer.

>LOL LUBE XDDDDDD
>KIDS TOY XD
>ROPE XD
>"LOL RANDUMMMM X3"

>>688755719
Id be slightly confused if you came to my work and bought those. I also work in a bakery so thatd be part of the issue

>Little girl who was browsing toys
>Duct tape
>Blindfold

>caramel apple kit
>onions
>don't need a third item but may as well buy lube i guess

Watermelon
Chicken
Another watermelon

>>688758857
Lost

>>688759243
those are 4 things

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>>688754342
Nice items
Great contribution to the thread

>>688756348
What about that Apple tho?

2 of the largest containers of mayonnaise available
a spoon

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>Baby bottle
>Powdered formula
>Rat poison

>>688759243
You're a faggot

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Whips
Niggers
Seeds for plantation

>beer
>whiskey
>congratulations on x weeks of sobriety card

>>688756817
Kek

>>688755007
winner and also spy

>>688759243
I'd say at least 30% are not, but if you're not ready to wade through shit, get off of 4chan

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>>688756179
KEK


>Adult diapers.
>Vodka
>Baby food.

>>688759413
Are you a retard?

>>688759612
of course

>>688752104
I once bought a poncho, bandanas, duct tape and Benadryl. The check out lady looked very confused.

>>688756195
kek

>>688757419
Would a hammer really help with taking shits?

>>688752104
sleeping pills, lube, condoms.

>>688752104
>Sewing kit
>Teddy bear
>Medical magazine

>>688759713
>not buying bendydick
Kys

Trash bags zip ties and large blue plastic barrels

>>688759337
Actually change that for
>Watermelon
>Chicken
>Happy Fathers day card.

>>688757775
Dog leash
Dog collar
Cat toy*

>>688759824
LOL good one XD

>>688759793
the point is that anyone can easily get a lubed cucumber in their ass without having to hammer it through, no matter how tight you think you are.

>>688759881
>lye
>zip ties
>55gal drum

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>giant snickers
>lip balm
>super long dowel rod

>>688752104
>A watermelon
>Fried Chicken
>Grape kool-aid

>>688760033
Fuck you noob only old users here in this board XD haha fucking retarde

>chair
>tie wraps
>dog shock collar

>>688760090
speak for yourself, homo

>Fish Fry breading
>frying oil
>all the fish from Walmart's pet fish section

>>688760090
Who said the poster wanted to use it in his own ass?

>>688757775
>implying leashing your pet isnt just a common bdsm practice
>implying she would assume it wasnt for a dog anyway

Enema kit, a giant Zucchini, and rubber gloves

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>>688752104
>Empty packet of Laxative already eaten in store
>Large cucumber...
>...superglued to hand

>adult diapers
>baby diapers
>laxatives

>>688759181
My bad I was just trying to excuse that guys ignorance

>>688760132
Implyong any murderer worth their salt would buy lye publically and not with bitcoin

(be black)
>"#1 dad" mug
>school supplies
>appropriate size t-shirt

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>>688760381
>>688760401

Overwatch
Minecraft
Steam gift card

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>>688760433
>Implyong

>>688759563
U make a good point

Condoms, an eggplant, and Tylenol

>>688759942
Lost

>>688760607
>implying not a typo

>Lotion
>Basket
>Hose

>>688760090
I mean my problem is more keeping that cucumber in my ass without it falling right back out

>>688760834
I'd fuck you.

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>>688760247
underrated.

>wicker chair
>giant rope
>copy of taken

>>688760941
Good luck.

Vinegar
Bleach
Rope

Try hanging yourself in the bathroom while gassing yourself at the same time

>stool softener
>stool hardener
>giant microwave burrito

You guys sick at this
>cucumber
>lubricated condom
>Full-House DVD set

>>688761109
Cure for world hunger right there.

>>688758111
Trips reward those who call them out.

>>688761165
You just did the same thing everyone else did, you fucking ape.

>>688761165
Meh. Decent

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>>688760729
>implying the word 'implyong' isn't funny

King size sheets
Twin-bed sized blanket
A hammock
Also I'm sleepy as fuck sorry

>>688761259
I bet he's a nigger

>>688760704

>Tricycle
>Bicycle helmet
>Adult diapers

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>>688760381
>tools
>toaster
>N.E.S.

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>>688758111
>>688755333
what the fuck is going on?!?

Cucumber
Children's coloring book
Rubber gloves

>>688761426
Shit, not bad man. You should hit the hay though.

>>688752104
>iPhone
>micro usb cable
>power strip

>>688761109
I like the joke but also is stool hardener a thing and how much does it cost?

>>688752104
Candy, lub, trash bag.

> Little Girls Panties
> Rope
> Turkey Baster

>>688752104
baking soda
tin foil
sauce pan

>Cabbage Patch Kid
>Staple Gun
>Human Centipede on Blu-Ray

>>688761615
Alright fine. Sleep tight bro

>>688760517
I'd be perplexed.

Jelly Doughnuts!!

Fuck buying weird shit, just say something like "haha you look like your board. Let me give you something to do". Speaking as a cashier it's 110% going to make them mad

>>688752104

paper cups
red food coloring
baking soda
vinegar

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>a framed picture of her at work
>a framed picture of her at work
>a framed picture of her at work

>>688754865
>Doughnuts
>Doughnut holes
>Glue
>Doughnuts
>Doughnut holes
>Glue
>Doughnuts
>Doughnut holes
>Glue
>Doughnuts
>Doughnut holes
>Glue
>Doughnuts
>Doughnut holes
>Glue
>Doughnuts
>Doughnut holes
>Glue
>Doughnuts
>Doughnut holes
>Glue
>Doughnuts
>Doughnut holes
>Glue

>snorkel
>finding nemo dvd
>map of world

>>688761872
Will do. Sweet dreams.

>>688761960
>three items
>three

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>>688761956
well shit!

>>688761956
Unless she's planking it wouldn't be appropriate.

>>688761962
>>688761963
the fuck is this fuckery?

>>688762099
Lmao you got me.

>>688761956
We are not tryong to make them made you fat selfish idiot we are trying to make them freaked out

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>>688761963
>>688760401
by any chance samefag?

>>688761960
>baking soda
>vinegar
>enema kit

>Vaseline
>5 Hour Energy
>John Wayne Calendar

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>>688762375

Alive chicken
A weedeater
Boric acid

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>>688762444

>>688762444
>not john wayne gacy calender

>bottle of wine
>candles
>Teen Magazine

>>688761691
I guess it's not for humans.. I've given some to dogs at the clinic but I assumed they had one for people too.

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>>688762487
I'm no cashier and that makes no fucking sense, well done

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>>688762444
Checked and KeKed.