>>688420559
i thought pretzels were made of tree bark and salt

>>688420559
i used to think cats and dogs were the same animal but all cats were girls and all dogs were boys

>>688420559
I thought dna was the aame thing as genes

>>688420559
I though the words "brought to you by..." was a single word.

"This show is brottiued by..."

my dad loved me

>>688420559
I used to think it was called a "washer ma dryer"

when i was around 10 i found a strangely colored marble. i held it tightly in my hand and sang the digimon theme song hoping it would turn into a digivice and transport me to the digital world and got really sad when it didnt. i miss being a dumb kid

i thought actors memorized every line from the movie and then they recorded it all in one shot

i thought babies came out of butts. imagine if that was true. like you buttfucked some woman and then 9 months later she shat out a baby

>>688420559
I used to think the world was originally black and white, due to older movies and tv, and scientist made color come about in the 70s

I thought everyone was equal.

Then as I grew up I realised anyone with dark skin is inherently inferior.

my brother used to think girls had only 1 hole, for piss/shit/dicks. I was so embarrased, I had to show him some hentai. and he was 17 ffs.

>>688421890
holy shit i did too. i also remember asking my grandpa what video games he played as a kid and he just laughed at me

>>688421890
Me too

I thought swearing was illegal

I dont think I was as stupid as you guys. I remember wanting to be cash bandicoot though. And I wore red converse, jeans and no shirt. I also had my mom give me a mohawk

>>688422078
is your brother an aspie?

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>>688421510
shit man, are you fine?

>>688420559
I used to think the words "Glass" and "Grass" were the same word, and whenever somebody said grass I would be like "Wait do you mean the sharp grass or the soft grass?"

>>688422541
yea

>>688422467
he is turbo virgin like me, but he is "slower". normal, but just stupid as fuck.

>>688422541
He's fine, faggot.

I used to think poo in the loo Indians and feather Indians were the same

>>688420559
I thought I was a robot, or at the very least, wasn't human

when i first started masturbating i thought you were supposed to keep going after you came until you pissed so all the fluids would come out otherwise some of your cum would get stuck and you'd get an infection

>>688420559
I thought nvidia geforce gpus actually created G forces

I thought I'd feel like an adult at 20

>>688423253
I thought I'd finally feel like an adult at 30

>>688423176
I still think this

Anything my sister told me
I found color pebbles that gave you powers!
Your Pokémon cards came to life!
How the fuck did I believe this shit?

>>688423253
this shit man... i always thought being an adult would feel so much different but im 24 now and honestly i just feel like a depressed kid with way more responsibilities

i thought the older you get the buffer you get, so bodybuilders were like 70

>>688420559
I thought I would get laid one day ;~;

>>688423400
I'm 87 and i feel like an adult

I used to think girls pee out of their ass

>>688423506
Well its too late now

>>688423523

When does it happen mate? Do i just suddenly die and an adult replaces me? is it instantaneous? Do I need to buy the dlc?

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>>688420559
I thought milf meant cum.

I used to think that they didn't have color back in the day which was why the photos were in black and white.

>>688423585
lol me too cause i saw my sister pee when we were kids and thats what it looked like to me

>>688423585
Some do

>>688423585
They don't?
And yes, I am a megavirgin.

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i used to think women shit out children during child birth. thats why it hurt so much.

>>688421882
That's true in Africa.

>>688423659
when does what happen

>>688423819
no, they pee out of their vagina

>>688423176
I thought so too because at that point I wanted to scream like how sex is portrayed in the cinemas.

>>688420559
>That people thought human life was valuable

>>688423738
i remember the first time i watched porn and didnt know the difference between cum and come. i was like why does she keep saying she's gonna come? come where?

>>688423959
Oh.
I guess we just pee out of our sexual organs then.

>>688423959
Not True

>>688424053
a girls urethra is between her clit and vulva... the more you know

>>688423738
I thought MILF meant it had a story

>>688424053
They have special tiny hole for it though. I know cause I had a gf who would like putting tiny things in it and using it as a second hole like sex stuff. Girls are fucking grooss

>>688424211
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO BELIEVE ANYMORE

>>688424254
It does

I used to think snakes were the cuted tails of lizards wich growed up

I thought that if I killed myself it would end my suffering

When I saw a company or shirt that had something like "Est. 1900" I thought it meant "estimated". Like they didn't know their year of origin and they were just guessing

>>688424353
It means mom id like to fuck

When two people marry and they kiss that's how they make babies.

>>688424435
does it not?

>>688424435
I still don't know what it means.

I used to think if you could break a hole in the tv screen that you could go in there and hang out in whatever show was on.

>>688424457
Any mom comes with a story

>>688424435
so then what it means?

>>688420559
I had a friend that thought niggers were just white people that wore a fuck ton of black make-up until he was 19

>>688424548
>>688424571
It means Establish

>>688424701
established. that's when the company was founded

>>688424645
a story of previous disatisfaction and future big dicks...

>>688424435
as i read this i even said "estimated 1900". god damn it i know thats not waht it means but so many years of saying it has imprinted it in my brain

>Peeing in a vagina makes babies

>>688423176
I first time I masturbated until I reached orgasm, around like 9 or 10, I felt that pressure and stopped immediately because I thought it was literally going to make my dick like explode and burst into flames or something. I went around thinking how lucky I was that I stopped when I did and that I still had my dick.

>>688424221
i didn't even realize this until i was like 20 years old and had sex several times... blew my fuckin mind

>All judges were really fat because they wore those big robes
>also that fat judge on the simpsons that got called fatty bimbolatty

>All tall buildings in big cities were all 2 dimensional
>nobody did drugs

I used to think the world used to be black and white, girls had penises, and in that chi shit. I had a friend in middle school who thought he came out of a "baby maker", and another friend who didn't know vaginas existed, and he didn't know what a penis was.

I used to believe in God.

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>>688424318
I think a lot of you anons could use a look at this.

Okay, let's settle the peeing debate right now.

Both men and women have a urethra. That is your pee hole, which is connected to your bladder.

Men have their urethras in their dicks. Women have their urethras in front of their vagina, a hole connected to their uterus. That is behind the bladder.

Everybody has an asshole, except for people born with a horrible deformity that meant certain horrible death through rupture and sepsis before stomas became a medical thing we do.

I thought that with enough training, you could teach a dog to play video games.

Also, that the word couch had an N in it.

I thought if I didn't go to college I would end up sucking dick for money.
Fuck teachers

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>>688422669
>Asianforsure.jpg

>>688425477
one of my cousins didnt have an anus at birth. she had to have surgery

>>688425068
before i knew what masturbating was (8 i think) i used too put my dick in front of some pressure blowing thing in this pool where i tooked swiming lessons because it felt good. Everyone looked at me wierd for some reason

I used to think the chicken express logo was a medical glove.

When I was a kid I used to think a woman's vagina was right under her belly button

i used to get the words cough and couch mixed up. like i thought coughing was spelled couching

until about 2 weeks ago i thought the word banana had three N's bannana

femanon here. i used to think guys wiped their dick after pissing like girls wipe their pussies

>>688426080
nop, we just shake

>>688422444
No you definitely were

>>688425747
I thought it was where it is actually located but I thought it was just a flat area of skin like on a barbie and you just rubbed it or something.

I used to think "lactose intolerance" was a joke pronounced "like toast and tolerant" because of All That and their propensity to use silly accents.

>>688426203
Shake?

>>688426409
yeah like shake your dick a couple times to get any excess drips of piss out

I used to think that inside of your chest was just empty, but in it was a big number of how old you were, and anything you ate just sort of fell in it and eventually came out.

>>688426409
yes, you give your dick a little shake to trow away the few pee drops remaining in the tip

I always thought that girls you have to rub your dick on the vagina to have sex. I didnt know that there is a hole where you Put your dick in. Until 5th grade when I saw my First porn

>>688426600
Dude i always just like squeezed my dick from he base to the tip like you would a almost-empty tube of toothpaste

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When I was little, and I first heard men had sperm and women had eggs, I thought it literally meant women lay eggs and that's how they had their babies

>>688420559
i used to think black men came black jizz, then i saw a porno and was like, what the fuck, it's white.

>>688426845
dude, that sounds overcomplicated and a little painfull

I thought buffering was spelled buffeting.

>>688426940
dude me too. like i thought it would look like straight up tar

>>688421510
If only you weren't a nigger

>>688424382
/b/ is for people over 18 kiddo.

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>>688426906
Like this..

When I was 4 or 5 I walked in on my mom showering and saw she had pubes, knowing that I did not, I assumed for the next few years the difference between girls and boys (besides boobs) was that boys did not have hairy penises and girls did.

>>688426940
i used to think a pussy looked like just a little crack, the first time i watched porno and saw labia i freaked out

>>688424382
UNDERAGE

if you wonder how, we can see through your webcam lol.

>>688422444
Check'd

>>688420559
When the soviet union broke up, I thought the land was literally pulling apart.

>>688426999
Well im uncut so it didn't feel like i was scraping my dick.

>>688427165
read the OP, "Post stupid shit you used to think when you were a kid."

>>688427260
yeah me too. like i thought it was basically a tiny ass crack with just a little hole in the middle

>>688426080
<(*_*)>...I was like, if girls wipe I should too. Feels cleaner.

I used to think the band's on the radio were playing live so when you paused it they had to stop mid song and just stand there quietly

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>>688425527
I was scared of the deep end in the pool and thought sharks or something else scary might be hiding in the murky depths. The ocean was fucking terrifying

>>688425216
I thought females had penises and didn't know what a vagina was either. Though I did know that babies came from mothers.

I used to think that the nose filters out the smells, so it doesnt go into your lungs
so whenever I started smelling something bad or toxic I intentionally closed my mouth and took breaths through my nose
of course it smelled bad but I was telling myself "its worth it"
nobody ever told me and I felt pretty fucking stupid when I found out it doesnt work like that at all

>>688427277
sure dude, enjoy my underage tits tru my non existing webcam

>>688421452
you're not alone

"What if someone ate a hotdog in one bite?"

>>688427260
Same i have little to no memory of it but i was like a war veteran having flashbacks to it.

>>688427556
i used to assume every song on the radio already existed and would get confused why i kept hearing some songs so much without realizing that they just came out

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>>688425527

>>688427751
then she is a girl with a lot of potencial

>>688424053
..... Even though girls don't... Guys DO.... So you didn't prove any point there

>>688426080
Some girls just shake.. O man hidden cams fucked me up

>>688427751
They have a world record for this.....

When I was about 7 my mom tried to explain how semen and eggs work but neglected the whole part about sex. From then until I was maybe 10 I thought whenever my piss came out clear it was semen.

So obviously I wondered to myself, when it's time to make kids how am I gonna know when it's pee or cum? Do I just keep pissing inside the girl every time I have to pee until it happens?

>>688424318
Fucking virgins man
You know what not even. Did you take a sex Ed class in 5th/6th grade???

That my life was actually worth something

>>688423088
You are a robot. Back to r9k with ya

>>688428219
Hahahaha that actually made me laugh for once

>>688424053
yes they do, i know it's true because it happens in hentai

>>688428282
IT WAS FUCKING USELESS
ONE OF THOSE ABSTINENCE WITHOUT ACTUALLY TEACHING SHIT ONES
WHY THE FUCK AM I TYPING IN CAPS

i used to think sperm were separate, living creatures from me with feelings and thoughts and emotions so i always felt bad when masturbating because i thought i was killing them

That I would find a girl who loved me back.

>>688423506
Your new goal is wizardry my friend

>>688421805
Theator actors do it all the time.

>>688428525
there's still hope my friend

>>688426080
>>688427553
I sometimes do (depends), is that weird?

>>688428525
Don't be a baby...

>>688428694
If you're 30 and single, there probably isn't

>>688423976
Without a doubt anon, without a fucking doubt

>>688428743
no, but it's a waste of paper

>>688421099
Wow what a moron

>>688421964
Why hasn't anyone acknowledged his edge?

>>688428860
nah girls get just as desperate as guys do the older they get. you'll just have to settle for an old lonely woman

>>688420559
Hmm were to start....
Well for beginners I was a very gullible kid
If I trusted you I would believe you
My mom told me that santa was just Jesus dressed up in the suit with a fake beard
My friend told me that he could make my pokemon cards come to life ( he was an evil genius to say the lease, bc I would always give him some of my best cards)
My mom used to tell me that if anything broke it could never be fixed again, I now realised she said this because we were broke and had no money to fix them.
I used to think a vagina was called Badiamonds
I used to think the red eyes I see floating everywhere were just my imagination then I found out that (about) every other generation of males in my family see these eyes

>>688422812
So you show him hentai?
And did the retard not pay attention in bio and health classes?

i thought a vagina was called a bachina

>>688429404
Badiamonds.... im not going to forget that in some time

>>688428525
love is overrated , take care of yourself, build up your life, live happy and free

>>688427449
you typed "cuted" and "growed" as if they were words

>>688429913
hey lol thats how i heard it in my little ears XD

>>688429176
edge? he speaks truth.

>>688428860
agreed. I'm 38 and single. one day I will lose all hope and be completely free.

>>688427592
There was this one time as a kid where I refused to get into my pool because the shadows reflecting off the bottom made it look like a pack of stingrays was swimming around on the bottom

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>>688429404
>gullible stuff
okay, with you so far

>red eyes I see floating everywhere ... every other generation of males in my family see these eyes
mfw

>>688430255
just get a hooker, they are cheaper than allowmoney

>>688430373
that's the kind of sense that might have kept steve Irwin alive.

>>688420559
I thought men got women pregnant by butt sex

>>688420559
I thought everyone got a turn being president.

>>688430468
my thoughts exactly. except for the part about allowmoney. I'm assuming autocorrect did that.

>>688430420
shit, you'r rigth, i stoped reading after badiamonds

>>688430577
Firstly, too soon, secondly, it was a fully above ground pool with crystal clean water, there's no conceivable way that they would have got in there, so my brilliant mind came to the conclusion that eggs hatched and the stingrays grew to full size, in between yesterday, which was when I went in the pool last, and the next day...

>>688431210
it's never too soon to make fun of the dead you didn't know as living

>>688424548
Are you fucking retarded?

It means established.

>>688428673
There's people arguing whether to spell it 'theater' or 'theatre,' and this retard just does his own thing.

>>688421008
Everyone thought that I think. I also thought lions were all boys and leopards and smaller cats were girls

Also babies come out a girls butt

>>688423464
Me to the letter. Even the age.

I used to think the Holocaust was real

>>688423659
Maximum kek

>>688420559
I used to think that the ocean was a safe place. I would go into pretty deep water at the beach up until about 14 when I picked up biology as a hobby.

Now the ocean is nope.

>>688430420
shit i didn't realize that i didn't delete I used to think, whoops i was gonna type that i used to think that if i didn't go to church i would die on monday because that's what my mom had told me. The "red eyes" thing, well that was an issue i had with my eye sight when i was younger

>>688425719
Oh shit. Me to nigger. That is how I had my first orgasm.

When I would see ads on TV for Football matches, I always wondered how they got the clip of the game to show in their ad. I thought for ages that Football was staged. Didn't realise it was previous game footage...

>>688423959
>>688424053
*Facepalm* it's called a urethra both men and women have them.... das were duh pee cum frem.

>>688420559
I didn't know that several didn't mean seven until I was 20..I'm 22 now.

I always called cannons "volcano things."

Also, I thought whistling chasers (fireworks) were called "nigger chasers" and knocking on a door only to run off and fool the occupant was called "nigger knocking."
I even asked some of my black neighbor kids if they wanted to go nigger knocking and pop some nigger chasers.

>>688429404
I also used to think that blackmailing someone, was just literally mailing completely black sheets of papers to people

Also my family are a bunch of crazy people, so they made up the dumbest reasons for most things

>>688431923
are sure it wasnt the devil?

One time when I was around 4 or 5, I went to get a pickle and the little stem that's sometimes on the end was split in two. My older brother told me that it was the pickle's antennae, like a bug, and the pickle was alive. I would creep into the kitchen at peek at it in the fridge for like a week until it dried up into a shriveled shell of a pickle. Fucking brothers, man.

>>688432822
oh shit son, well damn that just blew my mind, better go mail a letter to god and ask for him to save my sinner eyes

>>688425377
What's that? An eye?

>>688432577
not the same, but once i told this kid we should play WWII (i saw a movie that day) and he could be hitler because he was german

>>688432577
the last 2 were true depending on how and where you grew up.

>>688433167
the kind of eye you want to poke

>>688425377
so where does the "squirt" come from? never figured that one out

>>688431596
Never thought that about cats and dogs. I did think babies came out of butts and women peed out of their butts. I also thought approximately meant exactly.

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>>688427202
>>688426906
ooh, ya got any more?

>>688433501
"squirt" that you see in most porn videos is just piss. I promise you that much.

>>688433501
you mean when a woman urinates during intercourse?

>>688431925
so... pool jerck buddies?

>>688426080
ive wiped if i got excess drippage.. i hate pissy boxers

>>688433754
it's not urine, it the lube the vagina produces pushed out

Wrestling was real for me until about 14. I will never forget the day my buddy told me (and I swore he was a liar on my life). Then he popped in like Wrestlemania 5 or something on tape and slowed it down frame by frame.

My world crumbled.

>>688433713
bullshit.......

i put the ".........." because im not 100%.......... if thats the case ive been pissed on twice..... once in my mouth........ god damn it

I thought girls had dicks, but no balls

I also thought your sack was your bladder

>>688427556
>>688427893
I always thought when you played a game against computer players, like Mortal Kombat, that it was a guy at like the cable company or something who got paired up and would play against you. This was also before internet was a thing too, so I have no clue why I even thought that was possible.

>>688420559
when i was about 7 or 8, despite reading a lot of illustrated encyclopedias and "how stuff works" type books as a kid, after seeing the salt crystal experiment for the first time, i thought precious metals/gems/ores would grow back if the mines were left long enough

had a plan to visit a bunch of abandoned mines when i was a "grown up" and get rich

>>688434057
Women can do it, but not all the time and it's not the most common thing. Most porn videos will just use piss because it can be done when needed and looks convincing if your actress drinks plenty of water.

I used to think cartoon characters were actors with costumes.

I used to think US states were actually cities but by different names, some of them were specifically certain cities I was familiar with

>>688434033
im gonna need you to cite your sources

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>>688434530
I used to think cartoons were drawn on paper and that someone manually flicked through a big animation book under a camera.

>>688433370
And the kind that has an asshole in the corner.

>>688420559
I thought mint ice cream was made from grasshoppers.

>>688434573
sorry anon, source it's a sex ed teacher i haved, no links

>>688420559
i was happy for a black girl in my class because we got another black girl in the class, so she had someone to play with, i thought that black kids could only play with other black kids. i hated mixing stuff together

I thought an abstract title service was where they thought up the funny names for paint chip colors.

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>>688426906
>>688427202
>>688434601

>>688424221
Wrong terminology but we get what you mean. Don't worry you should be taking sex ed pretty soon right?

I thought that I would get the references when I got older, but now they're all fucking outdated and I still don't get them
>freakazoid and animaniacs are my examples

>>688429404
>I used to think the red eyes I see floating everywhere were just my imagination then I found out that (about) every other generation of males in my family see these eyes

That sounds like schizophrenia.