My car's mom tried to finger me in the back of my friend

>>687437870
yeah

When I was in 1st grade me and this girl who sat next to me would show each others genitals to each other and now its really awkward when we see each other now. So ya. Been gettin pussy since I was like 8

I have a fiancée, three girlfriends, and I'm actively chatting up more girls.

I know this is going to blow up in my face at some point but I cant stop.

I fucked my wife's sister.

>>687438334
Diddnt we all do that? I used to do it with a neighbour girl when I was like 6, got my finger in when I was 7

I won alot of money when I was 22. About 2million dollars, put it all in the bank and live off the intrest. My GF thinks I work but I'm actually just going to my other appartment to play games.
Also none of my friends know, it's better this way. I can live the lazy life I eish for and none is the wiser

I occasionally cheat on my wife with one of her best friends

>>687438826
What's your pretend job?

>>687438826
i want that life.

I sister fucked my wife.

I fucked my sister's wife.

I wife fucked my sister.

My Guinea pig sometimes pulls his poops out from his bootyhole while pooping, he eats some of his poops too.

Phew! Glad to get that off my chest!
Heavy weight.

>>687438826
how did you win the money? how much interest/month?

>>687437588

I love the smell of my farts

I fucked my sister wife.

I am blackmail cam guy

>>687437588
I wish I had a girlfriend

>>687439149
Boooo!!! Get out of here.

>>687438986
Software programming. It's what I was working with before I won, it also explains alot when I'm online and occasionally play online games. It sucks that I have to logg off for a few hours when I'm really into a game.

Dafu peaks my interests

I don't actually want to beat my depression, on the contrary I feel happiest whenever i am engaging in self destructive acts, because they make my suicidal thoughts feel more justified

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I sistered my wife's fuck.

Took a crane to get out.

I fucked my best friend's ex the other week.

>>687439145
It was actually two winnings, about 1300k from the lottery and the rest from and online gambling sites. I don't gamble anymore so no risk of losing the money, the intrest is about 3000 dollars each month 2500-3000 enough for a stable life

I gave my brother a bj when I was 14
I used to shoplift and cut myself like a fucking retard at that age too

>>687439535
faggot

i grew up with a cousin a year younger than me, she was my first kiss when i was 8, she was the first girl i fingered when i was 12, she was the first girl i fucked when i was 17, im 22 now and ive had many girl friends but nothing gets my dick harder than the thought of her, im pretty sure im in love with her but it sucks cause i know we can never be. i hate life.

>>687439434
Become a junkie, you'll find you also become way more motivated.

>>687438826
Does your family know?
That could buy me heroin for the rest of my life!*

*the real calculation: 1,190 weeks

>>687439686
yeah basically

I palced a camera right in front of the toilet and fap to my wife, her daughter, her sister, and many that came for partys, suppers, you name it.

>>687439878
Noone except people who have no idea of whi I am :)

I fucked my best friends hot gf to aid her revenge

I fucking hate myself and I'm aware that I don't seem like a good person, but I know I am. I'm not really cold or heartless, I do love people and I do have morals. But I'm too proud to tell anyone how I really feel about anything. I've been doing this for so long it seems like confessing isn't even an option, it's just not possible. I'm so sick of acting like I don't care about anything when in reality I care so much it hurts. For once I just wish somebody would talk to me and try to crack my shell. I really can't take it anymore.

I am Ryan

im fucking ur girlfriend. i've been fucking her for about a year now. i have no intention of stopping, she has no intention of telling you.

>>687440285
I'm Dunn

>>687440224
Just kill yourself

>>687440224
dont kill yourself man, just give it time, someone will try

I broke the dam

>>687440224
I think you need to find a way to open up rather than wait for someone to Crack you

Its half term so the blackmailing is gettin easier

>>687437588
I am an alien

An old school buddy turned out to be gay, and asked of he could suck my cock. I obliged

When I go to church every Sunday with my family and all the other kids in my Catholic school's families. I always ask if we can sit in the back of the balcony. I have a perfect view of the balconys first row and the entire first floor where the pews, people, alter are. I spend every single minute for an hour, imagining God pushing the people one by one off the first front row of the balcony, right over the wooden guard rail. I guess based off height and weight how fast they will fall and how long it will take for them to hit the ground. Amen.

>>68743975
my cousin is married now with a baby, last year i had sex with her while she was pregnant with her husbands baby and a few months ago i had sex with her while her baby was in the room watching, am i a horrible person?

I really like avocado with my eggs and bacon.

>>687441750
You sick fuck

>>687441649
Wow man
Why do you still do it?
Anyone friends /family know?

I killed someone

Last time i saw a snail i was forced to take out my penis and make the snail slither on it. My mom saw it and from that day on she walks away each time i aproach her. I was much more turned on that when i'm in bed w/ my gf.

>>687440880
I just can't.

>>687441649
Jesus Christ
Did you happen to have sex with her around 9 or a little less (premature) months before she gave birth ? Serious question

>>687442198
I did the same, but with a banana slug. It was at a summer camp in 6th grade except it was fucking horrible. It felt good for about five seconds, then the counselor saw me.

>>687442128
I dont know, when im around her i dont think straight.
yeah her 2 sisters know about us because ive also had sex with them aswell. yes ive had sex with 3 of my cousins and there all sisters.

>>687439988
> her daughter
you fap to your daughter?

>>687442349
yes we had sex twice, first when she was around 3 months due and again when she was in the 9th right before giving birth

>>687442825
i also took pictures but theyre in a broken phone, i should actually burn that phone for safety.

When my relationship started to go to shit, I started looking for a "plan B". Ex discovered it and tried to commit suicide because of it. I dumped her because she was unbearable to live with and I tell everyone she was crazy and tried to an hero for no good reason.

My mom has a habit of getting too drunk, passing out, getting naked, and masturbating in the living room all the while pretty much asleep. Sometimes I take pics

>>687443054
Not before dumping

I fucked my highschool teacher.

I was homeschooled.

>>687440224
Same here my friend, got a friend of mine which I used to say all shit to and I lost her because I was stupid, and now I'm afraid to talk to her

>>687439000
I want those trips :(

>>687443368
post the pics

>>687443633
I want those dubs:(

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>>687439000
Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level?

I've never got dubs.

>>687443495
if caught, it would destroy my life

>>687439988
Double dubs for the perv that has it all

>>687443773
it's not over 9000 technically speaking

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>>687443721

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>>687440413
I fuckin' knew it!!

>>687444113
Win! Got any close up vagoo

>>687442682
Whatthefuck.gif

How did you end up having sex with all three of them? Do you still have sex or recently with other two ?
How awkward must that be

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>>687444209
Yeah, she's got a bush tho

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>>687444097
In Which universe is 687439000 not over 9000?!?!

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>>687444695
I meant to 4 last digits only obviously

Here, have some porn for your mathematical vigilance

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>>687437588
THERES TRAPS EVERYWHERE. ITS DISGUSTING

BAPHOMET BE THINKING ITS SATAN

>>687444510
Cool stretch marks to bro. Ever fingered her?

>>687444860
>>>687443721
Hahahaha...Thanks :D :D

I liken wearing panties. Makes me feel pretty. And they're really really comfortable. Keeps your balls from sticking to your thigh.

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>>687444297
i had sex with each when i was around 14-17
my mom babysat them so things just happened, believe it or not they usually started it, but no i dont have sex with the other two anymore, theyre not attractive to me like the other one is. also heres how her puh looks like now.

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>>687444877
Nah,

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>>687445068
You drank too much oestrogen water...get a filter and look into the oestrogen levels in the water in your country.

>>687445638
I know, right..all these traps and fagbois are no accident..

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>>687445288
her face

>>687441381
They would fall at the same speed, dumbass.

>>687439767
can confirm. best bud ended up living in a trap house for a while. here's way better off now

I slept with my welding teacher the year after I graduated

>>687437588
I once found a drunk girl passed out in a doorway at 4am on a Saturday morning. I sat next to her and groped her tits and generally molested her for 30 minutes before she slowly woke up from it. She hadn't realized what had happened and told me her name and that she was 18. I fap to the thought of that night a couple of times a week still.

>>687446363
except for the one that is like a feather..feathers fall at a slower rate due to wider surface area..also the same effect can be observed with paper..also some clothing can have a marginal parachute effect so no, they not fall at the same speed but you wouldn't be able to easily notice a difference and in your imagination (which is what counts really) you can make the fat (american) ones fall slower

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>>687447488
Fair enough, your back to the future dubs show you are marty mcfly and therefore telling the truth.

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>>687446806
a house of traps you say...

Sex with the ex of my best friend, penetrating my ex while she was asleep (she wakes up and says it feels like we had sex and I acted like I just woke up...)

>>687447488
Yesterday, I saw an Asian male college student (George Washington university medical school ID) passed out in the lobby off a random apt building I was walking by, had pissed himself, was shwasted as fuck, could only open his eyes. His wallet was sprawled out outside. I sat him up and put his wallet under his hand. Left, came back, ambulance, fire department, police were there.

>>687437588
popped a cherry of a very young and kinda famous girl....
how young she is? still on "kids" and not on "teens" react

>>687448171
You should have said "yeah you pretty much slept through it.." I'd never do it but the IDEA and FANTASY of it turns a lot of girls on..whereas reality = rape so always clear it with her first

>>687448361
How old were you when you did it?

>>687448546
will keep that for myself for obvious reasons, so now u know what i am talking about

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I fapped watching "White Chicks" when i was 11yrs old.
I didn't know those are fucking niggers.

iv'e jizzed on multiple of my classmates lipstick

>>687448433
We are pretty relaxed by now, when neither of us is in a relationship we still have sex sometimes or just cuddle. Kinda grew up with her. So it's actually not that kind of a problem..

My mom has done daycare since I was 5. The first girl she got was obsessed with seeing my penis, she would drag me into the bathroom to play with it.

>>687448966
>Raped a girl in her sleep
>Not really a problem

Had sex with my ex bf's dog.

No one knows irl

A childhoodfriend ofmine and me killed about 30 animals as we were younger (like rabbits chicken etc.) and opened them to see whats inside

I still fucking my ex, and she already has boyfriend. I fuck her and he gets the rest... Poor guy xD

>>687449140
Nope, called her^^
She was like: I thought it was a dream, not a nightmare at all...
I don't think that it is rape, when you know each other really well, it was just weird, but I never complained about a mornig blowjob wich i couldnt really remember beause I fall back into sleep right away...

I'm a security guard at an electronics store. Once I saw two punks about 14-15 years old come in and start acting suspiciously. I watched them and realized they were probably shoplifting. Since I'm a police officer, I took snagged them both and took them back to the security room to be searched. I made them both undress completely and stand as naked as the day they were born, with their hands behind their heads while I searched their clothes and body surfaces. I found some copper parts in their pants and some DVDs in their shirts. I saw both of them were blushing bright pink from embarrassment and one little soldier was beginning to stand up. To teach them a lesson and search their bodies, I looked at their body surfaces. I made them open their mouths, lift their hands, and lift their legs and feet. Nothing there. For extra I made them both turn around and touch their toes, then turn back around, lift their ball sacs, lift their penises, and finally pull back their foreskins to expose their dark pink dick heads. Both had almost full boners and were blushing profusely by then.
I don't regret it. It's my job. Not my fault if a kid bones up or gets embarrassed sfter he shoplifts.

>>687448978
More, green text?

>>687437588
I finally have all my chips in place, bills caught up, no debt, even a decent yet small sum of saved cash. I'm considering selling what I have left when the lease for my apartment is up and just leaving all I know behind. Friends, family, where I grew up, all of it. I just don't know where I'd like to go to start over yet.

The reason it's a secret is because no one knows I've been planning this, and I don't them to because I don't want to hear shit about it from anyone.

Anyway, that's my big secret.

>Any opinions on where to go? I'm in FL now.

>>687451645
Move to Australia, Anon.

>>687451645
Move to a foreign hell hole live like a king, die from AIDS after fucking so many traps.

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>>687451862
Would have as a child. Unlikely now.

>>687452223
Why is that?

>>687452179
I hear an action similar to that made a suicidal man change his opinion on life and give it another go. Guess he had an epiphany in the midst of his cocaine fueled hooker orgy.

>>687452358
No real reason in particular, I'd just prefer to stay in the states for now.

>>687450342
"he made us bend over and pull our foreskins back until we were hard" "...oh really"
"not my fault when they get hard" won't hold up in court lol..enjoy when ralph bends you over in prison and does a "cavity search..not to worry though, I'm sure they go easy on pedo cops..lol

>>687452599
This someone you?

Move to a country where police are totally corrupt, do it for the lulz have the epiphany whilst balls deep in a questionably aged trap.

>>687452885
The idea of utilizing the power of the American dollar and living like a feudal lord does have its appeal. But in all honesty it'd make you a target too. I'd rather not have to look over my shoulder every time I go out.

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>>687437588
My top secret is that I'm a grown family man with a wife and kids, but every day I lock my doors and windows in my room to dance to this Kpop song.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iGJrWqeWlo8

>>687448832
Kek

I go onto 'tell secrets' threads on /b and write lies like this.

>>687453560
You monster.

QG are you here?

>>687453814
Qg and slender the same people?

>>687453927
No.

>>687437588
I'm staying with my older sister for a few days and last night I hid my phone in the bathroom to film her. Only got to see a little bit of her bare ass but I'm hoping for more before I leave.

Let my best friend fuck my gf as I watched. Been wanting to do that for a long time. Loved watching him kids get and pleasure her. Got so hard at the sight of her fucking and sucking my best friend. Watching them fuck was amazing. I came so fucking much.

I want to see my wife's sister naked and have tried many times, but always fail. Sucks.

I let my friend's dog lick my asshole for 30 minutes once.

I want to fuck my mom and my sister unprotected. But I only want to get my sister pregnant. They're both so sexy.

>>687454046
How would you feel if she left you for him?

I found a box of nude/lingerie photos of my mother, that I then kept. Never told anyone.

>>687454168
haha..americans..

>>687438826
how much interest?

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<-- I made this to kill time while reading this thread

>>687454170
Idk. As long as I could watch her get fucked. It was wrong and taboo. I think that's why I wanted it for so long and was so turned on by it. It was so hot to see her with someone else.

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I dry humped my cousin and pee'd on her when I was 6.

I saw a porno from my mom's boyfriends stash when I was about 4...so that was kind of my inspiration..lol.

>>687454607
>haha..americans..

>>687438826
Man, you're lucky. I wish I had a GF.

>>687438826
You da man. Seriously though, enjoy for your /b/ros who can't. A lot of us would love that life.

>>687454433
I already answered that question, fuckwit.

>>687454403
Fuck you. Everyone one wants to fuck them. I'm lucky enough to live with them. They walk around in a t-shirt and panties sometimes. Ooo. If I didn't want to fuck these sexy women I'd be gay.

I won and lost 16k of skins on csgowild in one day, told no one.

>>687437588
Sometimes I put my fingers in my ass and shovel out the turds. No more constipation

I'm a very asocial person at heart. I do my best to go with the flow, and I have 5 good friends that I hang out with pretty often. But every time I'm in the club I just want to be at home, or when I'm with a big group I never know how to make small talk or show a girl I'm interested without coming off as a total creep.

>>687446363
You clearly don't understand physics. Yes, in a vacuum they would but density and the area of friction play a role here on earth

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>>687454807
Not everyone wants to impregnate their sister, inbred jed. No wonder Trump is doing well, more than half of 'merica are inbreds, cucks and feminazis!

>>687439287
nice way to cover that haha

>>687437588
I once fapped over a picture of my mom when she was 11 but only found out it was her a few days after.

>>687455008
Hmm. Okay. I see your point there. Fine. I will pull out. But I still wanna fuck them really hard like ... as punishment for being cock teases. Oh yeah, and they know. I told them both

>>687437588
My boyfriend Mom's truck inside me finger tried bang. Feelsggoodman.jgp

>>687455664
noob here but what does the jgp extension do?

>>687438595
Been wanting to do this forever. Her sister is way too conservative for it to go down but I still dream and get creepshots when I can

>>687455729
Let's us know who the newfags are

>>687443368
U wat?!

>>687456011
My mom has done that to alot

>>687443368
when i was 14 i spent most nights up late playing rpgs (literal gaming gurrl), once i went downstairs to get a snack and my dad was on the couch asleep with his dick out. i hadn't ever seen a dick irl (i'm unpopular and ugly) so i sneaked closer and looked at it. i smelled it and he woke up. he asked what the fuck are you doing and i ran upstairs and we never talked about it again

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>>687455008

>>687456505
How ugly?

>>687456505
Was it wet?

I stuck my dick in a bucket of butter in front of my family on a trip to a farm when I was 5.

>>687456505
Picture of you with time stamp

>>687456805
glasses, red hair, and poor. and i had acne then but not any more.

>>687456857
no it looked like he fapped and fell asleep after. it smelled weird and i now know its the smell of cum

>>687457043
Sounds cute, post a pic. I imagine you might be what I'm in to

>>687457043
Has he done that a number of times?

>>687439767
This is true....I'm a junkie and hustle up anywhere from 75$-150$ a day for dope doing legal shit:) You'd be surprised how crafty you can get:)

>>687446989
>welding teacher
wut?

>>687457158
pic of what? im not comfortable with posting my face

>>687457204
he was often downstairs until late after my mom went to bed, so i saw him there every time i went down to grab a drink or snack. a couple times i saw him asleep and a couple times with his dick out

sometimes if i feel really bad i will choke a cat until i feel the tension inside me release. doesnt take long and they dont realize what im doing so i will just show them love after and they are fine.

I fuck my exgf any chance I get. She's into the same nasty shit i'm into My current gf suspects it is going on, but can't catch me.

I knocked up my brother's wife and we blamed it on him.

>>687457961
Ever see him fap? Without him knowing?

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I'm sexually attracted to my daughter. Her body is so tight and sexy.

>>687457961
How about through email or kik?