A girlfriend

Preferably female

One with two boobs and one vagina

>>687388629
A mute one

One that will stick around

>>687388629
the one I'm meant to be with

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Loyal, smart, witty, high sex drive, clingy.

One that has two X chromosomes

>>687388629
One I can hide from my wife...

One with a pulse.

Ideally I'd like a real qt3.14 whos loyal, funny, playful, easygoing, and recipricates my feelings.

>>687389185
Fucking faggot.

A qt3.14 with short hair and is generally kind. Dark hair and green/blue eyes is best. Also a nice ass. Idc about breasts as long as they are there. Wont cheat on me. Thats it.

One who isnt a damn near retarded pleb bitch.. i will die alone

>>687389277
dis

>>687388629
a loyal one that loves me

Tbh all I really ask for is loyalty. As long as she isn't fat or deformed somehow, it's fine. My best relationship was with a 4/10 girl, 9/10 came close but I'd still take the 4/10 back over her.

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Rich

>>687388629
one thats not my hand

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I just want my ex back in basic terms

Someone who can put up with my meme-loving bullshit

>>687389544
yeah everyone thinks they kind of want a clingy girlfriend until you get one. shit sucks

>>687392499
This. Also someone who understands and appreciates ironic memery, and not those nigger/relationship facebook memes.

>>687388629
A girl that would actually love me until I die

>>687388629
The kind that kills me

>>687392643
I've had clingy girls and I loved it. Maybe because I'm clingy myself.

One who will love me for who I am, and enjoy being around. A girlfriend who will hold me when I'm sad, calm my anger, laugh at the stupid jokes I make, and just lay with me as I read; and I want to be able to return the favor to her as well. I want someone who I can be proud of, and who will be proud of me. That's all I want.

>>687393276
obviously this

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Beautiful Asian

A girlfriend that is fun to be around, thinks highly of me, and is always there when I need love

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>>687389650

>>687388629
Sauce?

>>687393087
Jack? Is that you?

>>687390851
I bet you kiss girls faggot

>>687388629
The kind who shuts the fuck up when i want her to, can cook well, puts out and is doesn't have enough self esteem to cheat on me.

>>687388629
>Smokes weed
>Virgin
>Willing to absolutely anything for ME...SPECIFICALLY.....both sexually and otherwise
>good sense of humor
>is her own person with her own personality and doesn't make any adjustments to accommodate yours (I still admire my ex for this because I'm not a bitter bitch)
>Cooks (at the very least for herself)
>Cleans (at the very least after herself)
>Healthy
>fit
>Not lazy AT ALL
>fun (not slutty, not insane, not overly spontaneous, not too eccentric or enthusiastic, just knows how to enjoy a good time with someone without dipping into bad moods or unneeded arguments)
>headstrong (99.999999999999999 oercent of any problem in any relationship is due to the fact that both women and men are easily steered by a plethora of outside sources so much so that your very relationship hinges on whether or not society wants the two of you together. Remember that; TV, movies, music, the internet, and just plain old other people will try to affect you through conversations, subliminal messaging, and metaphorical instances portrayed in song or drama. The internet just shows pictures and videos that brainwash you into following whoever the fuck they tell you to.)
>Makes her own decisions without outside assistance.
>Smart (you don't have to be a genius, just please don't be stupid. I'm not smart enough to solve both our problems and I need you to be what I can't be.
>Skeptical
>A degree of paranoia
>takes ideas and theories I mention seriously instead of instantly dismissing them because they aren't the accepted standard.
>Fucks me as often as possible
>doesn't cheat
>knows I won't cheat
>takes care of herself
>has her own things
>doesn't require marriage
>wants to do everything worth doing in this world with me.

>>687389504
what are you gay? gtfo of here with that ignorant disney bullshit.

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One who I can fap to.

>>687394791
My name's Jack, yeah. Do I know you?

A real one

>>687395040
yeah that will happen

>>687395193
Depends. You don't happen to have gotten a guy named Brian you knew from high school hired somewhere, have you?

>>687395193
>>687394791
Woah what's happening here?

>>687395334
You guys gay with eachother?

>>687388629
One made entirely of socks. I've fantasized and dreamed of making love to a "sock girl" since before I was a teen. I want the mouth, tongue, lips, belly, pussy, everything about her to be made of soft sock fabric. I would fuck her all the time and do my best to impregnate her.

>>687395277
>this was far fetched the minute I mentioned her being a virgin.

>>687395523
your humor is something to be desired.

>>687395429
>>687395515
I know a guy named Jack who is engaged with this girl and they're both a bit clingy but they both like that about one another. I'm wondering if it's the same Jack as this Jack-anon.

>>687395786
Humor? I'm being 100% serious.

This chick at school Vicki I've had a crush on since like fucking 9th grade. She's funny, she understands me, she's cute, she likes most of the things I do, and she's smart. I finally managed to go out with her a couple times, but idk if it'll last because I'm going to Uni soon

>>687395786
You mean LEAVES something to be desired. If it's something to be desired, that means that you're envious of his sense of humour.

one that doesnt give me shit, and doesnt nag

>>687396336
That is what he meant. He thought I was making some clever joke, but I was just being honest.

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>>687394943

I'm 18 and a virgin and my ideal girlfriend right now would be a qt virgin we would both lose our virginity to and explore different kinks. I don't think many girls are still virgins at my age doe.

new

>>687396869
Dude... Don't say "doe" like that. I don't care what race you are, it makes you look and sound like a fucking idiot. It's no wonder you're a fucking virgin.

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>>687388629
The one that actually wants to be with me.

>>687397046
I said it ironically, famboi

>>687397308
That's irrelevant. Don't say it at all. Saying it ironically makes you a douchebag as well as stupid sounding, rather than just stupid sounding.

>>687397046
You had a problem with him saying "Doe" but not "qt"? Literally worse than doe.

>>687397577
Yes, I had a problem with qt as well, but to me that's far better than "doe".

>>687388629

a real one

>>687398156
You'll get there, bud. Don't worry.

One with a leg disability so she can't run away.

>>687398320

3 years from becoming a wizard

I don't think it will

>>687398367
Why not just wish for her with no legs? Then they're not disabled, they just don't exist.

neurotic alpha female

>>687398405
I do think it will. I believe in you. You're a very special person. Don't be so hard on yourself.

>>687388629
It's a paradox. The kind of girl I like is the kind that wouldn't like someone like me.

>>687398405
Lost mine at 33 and I'm engaged now, beating the pussy up everyday now

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>>687395040
>healthy
>fit
>not lazy at all
>smokes weed

You're gonna be disappointed if you don't lower your expectations

>>687399417
>forsaking your right to powers after making it the three decades
You are no brother of mine.

>>687390906
You and I have the exact same taste in women.