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/nzg/ - The New Zealand General: Sam Edition
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The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
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/nzg/ - The New Zealand General: Sam Edition
>>
>>686908407
the fuck is Sam edition?
>>
Why are IDs even gone?
>>
Freezing frost monkeys its cold
>>
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>>686908407
>Christchurch

Cold as shit.. Someone cuddle
>>
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>>686908557
New week, new news presenter, new thread.
>>
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>>686908407
>>
I just got home and my penis is still flaccid. I'm not ready for this.
>>
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>>686909133
>tfw she will never love me
>>
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>>686909133
ayyy muh nigga.
>>
Anyone have that image of the Austrian map with Australian cities listed instead? Was in last nights thread.
>>
>>686909533
cuck
>>
R I T A N O N

Tinychat keeps fucking out so I will just come here...
>>
>>686909681
Brush ya teeth
>>
>>686909133
>>686909533
Checked.
Maybe she'll love you for your dubs.
>>
>>686909730
Q U A D R A N T S
>>
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>>686909382
GET READY BOI
>>
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>Christchurch
>>
>>686909842
Ritanon here. That picture makes me sad because he got shot and died :(
>>
>>686909953
IDbro here. Make me sad too, anon
>>
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>>686909953
He was a good boy. He dindu nuffin.
>>
Ritanon here. Does anyone ever look at animals and think "wtf they're not human. That's so weird, they're so different to me"?. Just think about it... Wow.
>>
>>686910199
Very nice
>>
>>686909953
fucking who?
nobody cares who you are m8
>>
>>686910386
no, because i'm not a virgin faggot.
>>
>>686910140
May he rest in peace. I hope wherever he is, he is out of pain and has as many bananas as he likes!

>>686910361
Agreed.
>>
>>686910422
olololloloololollo
>>
>>686910422
Well hi to you too, Negative Nancy!

>>686910450
Virgins are cool though?
>>
You guys suck, you seriously suck.

This might as well be some reddit circle jerk, but worse.
>>
>>686910422
>>686910450
You're in the wrong thread newbro.
>>
Ritanon here. The other day, I was walking along the footpath, and I was looking at the sky and suddenly I thought "Wow, this world is so big. I'm so insignificant. Rainbows and things are so interesting...".
>>
>>686910854
What went wrong?
>>
these threads are shit now
>>
some femanon show boobies.
>>
>>686911093
>>686911048
>>686910854
>>686910450
>>686910422
Why is this thread so homosexually new? What is happening?
>>
Ritanon here. Isn't it weird how I can use a small device to connect to a network of other people (you guys) through the means of technology created by humans? So weird. In like, year 1600 or some shit they would never believe this... If I was a caveman I wouldn't be able to create an iPhone like wtf. Imagine a medieval person or something seeing touchscreen. Absolutely riveting stuff guys.
>>
>>686911400
Cavemen couldn't make iphones because they weren't Chinese.
>>
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>>686911339
>hurrr durrrrr fucking newfags
>Doesn't even know who Ritanon is
>kek, how new are you
>mfw can't get an erection unless trap porn

You are cancer
>>
>>686911339
>mad cause we don't know who you are
>>
>>686911400
Have you ever considered that blackholes are created by warping through space?

That they only last split seconds by we perceive them as forever?

What if the key to long distance spacetravel is the destruction of our universe?
>>
>>686911879
>created by warping through space
>>
Ritanon here. I'm sitting here watching TV and thinking about evolution. Isn't it so weird how like, a Chinese person has different looking eyes to an English person... Like, we evolve to adapt to the conditions of where we are and where our ancestors have come from and stuff. I was looking at a seagull the other day thinking "wow, that seagulls great great great grandfather was probably a pterodactyl thousands of years ago".
>>
some femanon show boobs.
>>
>>686912109
>Bending Space/Time
>Create Blackhole to travel through space

You unlogic?
>>
>>686912196
>evolve to adapt

China must be bright
>>
>>686912347
Ritanon here. I read it was something to do with like, rain or snowy conditions or something...
>>
Got my gigabit connection installed today boys.

Speedtest doesn't do it justice at all.

http://www.speedtest.net/result/5363947908.png
>>
>>686912482
It's because they don't get to keep the fake Ray Bans they make in bulk
>>
>>686912541
Ping to LA please.
>>
>>686912639
average of ~145ms
>>
Ritanon here. Do you guys ever wonder how the first human got to earth like wtf... He/she would've been a baby monkey or something that couldn't walk and stuff. If humans evolved from monkeys or apes or whatever (RIP zoo gorilla that got shot) then what did apes evolve from? An insect or something. What came first the chicken or the egg!? These things drive me crazy.
>>
>>686912764
Not that different to ADSL2+ then. I get 150-180ms. Ping is all that matters to me, though downloading the new Game of Thrones in 7 seconds instead of 30 minutes would be nice.
>>
>>686911552
kek faggot got rekt
>>
>>686912924
Yeah i noticed a difference in pings locally (inside of NZ) but apart from that nothing major.

Download depends on how you have your Torrent client configured and where you are getting your torrent(s) from.
>>
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Opotiki master race reporting in and ready to breed with your gf
>>
>>686913091
Not really given the way that torrents work. Providing you have enough seeds you can max the speed.
>>
Ritanon here. I was reading through some of the posts in this thread and i thought to myself "wow, some of these people are so negative but some are cool and interesting and chill". I want to make it clear that even though some of you are prejudice towards me, I love you regardless. Let's make this a positive place! #AllLivesMatter
>>
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TFW you're in love with a 16 year old taiwanese girl
>>
>>686913278
how many drugs do you sell?
>>
>>686913463
#OnlyWhitesMatter
>>
How are the brothels in NZ. Thinking of making the trip
>>
>>686913535
>bad quality image
>incorrect filename syntax
>no greentext
>taiwanese
Step it up, fake IDbro
>>
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>>686913285
Yeah but if a torrent is on a public site (KAT, TPB etc) and it is a new torrent, there will be like 5 seeders for the thousands of leechers that are on the torrent, meaning you probably wont get full speed right away.

wtf is this shit 4chan
>>
>>686913564
Decent. Chicks are all wired on P so they go pretty hard.
>>
>>686913704
What is P?
>>
>>686913662
That's the same regardless of the connection type you're on.
>>
>>686913535
desperate for some (you)s?
>>
>>686913770
Methamphetamine
>>
>>686913770
Just Googled it. Are there a lot of tweezers out there
>>
>>686913535

>Guaranteed replies
>>
>>686913542
i will literally cuck you
>>
>>686914083
fuck off nudesfag
>>
>>686914031
>>686913808
>>686913649
>doesn't matter got replies anyway
>>
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>>686914123
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>>686913535
Kyss!
>>
Ritanon here. I'm currently in my hometown of Auckland, where it is raining. I was listening to the raindrops on the roof and the thought struck me "what makes me enjoy the sound of raindrops hitting the roof?". Is it because I'm nice and comfortable and warm inside and it's a reminder that I am safe and sound from the uncomfortable conditions that my caveman ancestors long before me had to endure? Or does it simply just sound good? I also get ASMR so could it somehow be related to that?
>>
>>686914237
the madman actually did it.
>>
Anyone have Anna slotnicks nudes?
>>
>>686914377
Wait, is it actually you posting this shit?
>>
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Chch reporting in. Hope everyone's keeping warm!
>>
>>686914634
Yes, this is Ritanon, haha. (I can't post pics of Rita or Sasha with my posts because I'm on iPhone).
>>
Anyone else can't use the tc?
>>
>>686914634
ignore it.
>>
american here.
i like you guys from new zealand. you kick ass, have a great piece of land, and know how to have fun.
seriously - keep being awesome.
xoxo,
drunk guy from los angeles.
>>
>>686914805
Ritanon here. I'm on my neighbours wifi using iPhone and I got on tinychat earlier but it keeps disconnecting. :(
>>
>>686914634
Don't reply to the newfag attention whore
>>
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>>686912541
>Download: 420 Mb/s
aww yeee
>>
>>686914850
>>686914924
I'm not an attention whore. This thread is here to be used and I'm making conversation! :) Why should he ignore me?
>>
>>686914744
Checked.
Oil fin reporting. Warm is yes. Snow is forecast.
Upto in Chch?
>>
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>>686914237
>>
>>686914917
Yeah it's working for me now. Hey rita it's theguy. How's it going?
>>
>>686914744
Freezing my testes off actually, and I'm in Auckland. Your nips must be diamonds down there.
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>>686914744
Snow? Fuck that. This winter is going to suck massive dick. I'm just trying to keep warm, flopping around with the general hobbies.
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>>686915209
They sure are, my nips could cut glass.
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this could well be the worst NZ thread of all time
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>>686915195
Hey theguy! Long time no talk man. I've been good aside from the fact that my internet was finally cut off, haha. How have you been?
>>
Anyone know her?
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>>686915535
name from
>>
>>686915535
fuck off nudesfag
>>
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>>686915316
We already had a bit here. Haven't you?
Electric blanket up to eleven, cuddles with your boy-o, knit a full body suit. Sorted.
>>
>>686915501
Pretty good, got a smartphone. Been using snapchat to send people pictures of my dick, great fun.
>>
Are you poor fucks done complaining about the house prices yet? I can't wait to see all brown cunts move out of Auckland.
>>
>>686915864
fuk u son of basterd bitch. India has a fukcing space program asshole we will be superpower by 2020
>>
>>686915796
I havn't dared to look outside, boy-o isn't allowed to do sleep overs on work days. And the only thing I can knit are scarves. RIP
>>
>>686915864
Why would they? WINZ pays their rent.
>>
>>686915535
yea kek
>>
>>686915535
If anyone gets her name ill post more pics
>>
>>686915998
have you been dutch oven'd yet?
>>
>>686916032
j?
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>>686916096
Nope, if he did I would legit lose it. probably go full REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>
>>686916032
literally no one cares
>>
>>686915998
Knit a really big wide scarfe. Congratulations, you now have a blanket.
>>
>>686915818
Hahaha, welcome to the smartphone club m8!
>>
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>>686915789
What is this, Bruceposting?
>>
>>686916290
The "smartphone" buzz word really caught on and became so normalised. The power of marketing.
>>
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>>686916203
I don't have knitting needles long enough to hold a blanket. I'd have to make it in sections then sew it together and it would probably take me a month to make it.
>>
>>686916444
Triple checked. Use your arms, they're long and thin.
>>
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>>686916173
what's it like having a fart fetish?
>>
>>686916438
Pretty sure everyone just calls them "phones" only behind the times cunts like me say "smartphone" because I had an old phone until a week ago.
>>
>>686916032
just post them faggot
>>
>>686915998
Fair enough, there's probably not much to see.
You knit hats as well, fool. Incorporate a scarf into one and then just keep going
>>686916444
Also checked
>>
>>686916606
As someone who works for a phone company and hears "It's supposed to be a SMART phone" 10 times a day I can tell you that you're wrong on this one.
>>
Ritanon here. I think it's time I go put on a podcast and try get some sleep now guys. Enjoy your night! :)
>>
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>>686916566
Don't even start with that. I feel like a Jew in Auschwitz.
>>
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>>686912541
you can do better..
>>
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>>686916859
I'll fucking put you in an oven.
See how you like it.
>>
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>>686917077
Checked
Also I wish I was small enough to fit in an oven, I feel like that would be a great way to get warm.
>gravy my ass and call me turkey
>>
>>686916976
i am beyond jelous
>>
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Who is excited about our new Olympic pole vaulter? Eliza McCartney
>>
Any chch anons walked down Colombo St lately? Outside Ballantynes I got hit up 3 times for two bucks today. There were 7 people in total on that block asking for my hard earned money.

Fourth dude I passed gave him evil look which stopped him opening his mouth. How the fuck when there's so much work in town can we suddenly have losers like this. Get off your arses.
>>
>>686916976
http://www.speedtest.net/result/5364871171.png

I fucking hate you both. Want to download me a game then post it up to me? It'll be here a lot quicker.
>>
>>686917312
I'd chop off your limbs and shove you in the oven.
>>
>>686917420
Kek. I have no sympathy for you as someone who works in Auckland CBD.
>>
>>686917576
you'd still have to download it yourself on your piece of shit internet.
>>
>>686915535
ashley?
>>
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>>686917420
I went to paknsave moorhouse on Saturday night, there was a kid in a door way to the side of the entrance who was begging. Holy shit he looked like he was only like 16, huge purple rings round his eyes and looked fucking dead.

In the big scheme of things people like that can't just walk into a place and get employment. They need medical help, a bed, new clothes. Winz has so many hoops for people to jump through that it becomes to hard.

And I've definitely noticed that places like Winz are more happy to help women than men. When have you ever seen a homeless woman?
>>
>>686917420
give them 2 dollars.
build up a rapport with them.
become friends.

when your cuck ass gets pushed out onto the streets you will have friends that can teach you the ways.

cunt.
>>
>>686917669
Why would I have to download it myself if you've already downloaded it and put it onto a flash drive?
>>
>>686917636
I work there too, do you ever run into Cowboy?
>>
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>>686917601
Obby, what's gotten you so salty? Did you manage to get offended on a anime image board.
>>
>>686917714
Initials GG
>>
>>686917737
because I can't fucking read.

go to an internet cafe you ball sack.
>>
>>686917776
I'll fucking bite your face cunt.
>>
>>686917636

That's what I was thinking, have we become Auckland all of a sudden? Walking down Queen St is getting pretty scodie. Im gonna sound like my dad here but theres so much construction work available in chch atm and all locals know this. These guys are just leaching off tourists ,' omg an earthquake, you don't have a house, you poor man, here have ten bucks.
>>
>>686916976
Yeah i can do better, but i was doing the tests on a laptop, waiting on a 20m ethernet cable to arrive for my desktop.
>>
>>686917720
As a previously homeless man can confirm. It's incredibly difficult to get the help from them when you actually desperately need it.

On homeless women though, there's quite a few. It is mostly men though. Homeless women are usually insane. Not like "Haha she's crazy" literally insane. Most homeless men are down on their luck, but a few are just crazy.

>>686917738
I don't name them. It humanises them and makes me feel sympathy.
>>
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>>686917838
If you do it gently I might like it ;)
>>
>>686917776
That's the kind of caring partner you should strive for, really
>>
>>686917969
I can imagine, it's not like you've got 8 forms of ID, your birth certificate, history of employment and 12 referees in your pocket for winz
>>
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>>686917997
I'LL FUCKING BITE YOUR FACE CUNT!
>>
>>686915741
>nudes
>fag
choose one
>>
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>>686918077
I like the one of the mouse getting it's dick cut off more. Step up.
>>
>>686918070
Worse than that. Even if you happen to have all of that shit, you need an address. No address no bene.
>>
>>686918151
Fuck that's dumb. The point of Winz is to help people like the homeless but they do the complete opposite.
>>
>>686918150
did I fucking say I'll cut your face?
do you think this is a fucking game?
>>
Thing is we are importing people from Philippines and Brazil to do donkey work on the rebuild. And its fairly decent pay for no skills. Don't anyone tell me that 40 year old moari lying on his fat arse can't get work. Cunt should be ashamed of himself for hitting up someone half his age.
>>
>>686918230
They're there to help the Maoris not work. I still remember sitting in the WINZ office after I just became homeless just crying. They wouldn't do anything to help me.
Actually, they gave me a tissue.
>>
>>686918396
That's absolutely disgusting, I would have thrown a bitch fit.
>>
femanon show tits!
>>
>>686918570
Go to bed, mate. You've got an early flight in the morning.
>>
>>686918631
I don't have a flight in the morning.
What are you talking about?
>>
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Europefag here. Do you guys have and Maori/Polynesian nudes or porn... never seen any.
>>
>>686918741
what is this?

...............
>>
>>686918786
my one and only...... is it genuine???
>>
>>686918926
>Baboon like tits
>trying to be gangtsa
seems legit.
>>
>>686919110
any more... anywhere???
>>
>>686918741
THIS IS YOUR DAILY REMINDER THAT NUDES FAGS ARE CANCER. KYS
>>
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>>686919290
Have you tried looking at the national geographic website?
>>
Rip Hilary you will be missed ya sek cunt
>>
palmerston north checkin in here
>>
>>686919509
dat replacement doe
>>
>>686919565
wassup fellow palmy bro
>>
>>686919634
she was a sek cunt i would bang 9/11 but her replacement is meh
>>
>>686919634
who is this?

I have not watched news in for ever.
>>
>>686919509
>literally this current year
>still watch news channels
KYS
>>
>>686919702
yeeeeeah nah nothing much m8
>>
>>686920205
hahahha what a fucking retard

what's the matter? baby can't filter out the shit?
>>
>>686920307
newsfags are cancer fgt. kys on livestream and then send me the link
>>
God damn I'm desperate to get my ass fucked.

Don't even care who or where, just as long as it's a big thick cock that can fill my hole.
>>
>>686920236
Fuck Palmys boring
>>
>>686920425
Congratulations. you are a 100% certified faggot
>>
>>686920481
Most interesting thing in this place is to watch drunks beat each other up at 3am. I just feel sorry for people born here that'll never leave cause it's 'home'
>>
>>686920481
Swear I've seen her before, who is this?? hahaha
Yeah casual palmy boring as fuck
>>
>>686920205
Good to know we have people like you in the world you are probably a fucking Maori stupid sand nigger go eat your chicken and kumra and winz faggot
>>
>>686920830
kek your dad probably works for me poorfag. stay mad
>>
>>686920787
tbh im probs one of those people who won't leave

>>686920795
mya
>>
run out of things to do on the internet.
stare at google homepage for an hour.
>>
>>686921144
Roll for more dubs
>>
>>686921066
I swear she works at new world aye?
>>
>>686920481
got more palmy stuff? i have some too
>>
>>686921317
drop them
>>
>>686921384
sure you first. are you John Smith
>>
Not sure if will has internet.
going to download stardew valley.
>>
>>686921317
who do you have bro? names/initials?
>>
>>686915535
ayla?
>>
>>686920425
Where you at?
>>
>>686921551
mya katrina georgia claudia annalyse kaitlyn etc
>>
Downloading Stardew Valley to play while out of internet.

What else should I get?
>>
>>686921856
check your emails bro
>>
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>>686921699
aylar lie?

Basshunter chick did porn to start out with..
she took some black dick though.
>>
>>686921856
drop them bro!!
>>
>>686922113
xo
>>
>>686922165
why dont you contribute first
>>
>>686922165
sure, you post something first though
>>
how do we get Nudes fags banned from our thread? is there a way we can report them for spamming etc?
>>
>>686922377
Kill yourself, it is the only way
>>
>>686922377
theres that fag talk we talked about
>>
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>>686922377
you can report them for rule violation which i guess would be in breach of their anti spamming rules. if enough people report them it will flag up and the Mods could ban their IP that way
>>
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>>686922654
whos that?
>>
>>686922377
You're the only person complaining about nudes
>>
>>686922639
i want to believe
>>
>>686922887
literallly minimum of 3 based anons complains about you cancerous fags in each thread.
>>
>>686922892
most of this shit they are putting up is CP.
they don't own the copyright to.
Have acquired the photos through means illegal to them.
They aren't allowed to possess those pictures.

reported them to the NZ cyberpolice g.
for real.

This is one type of cancer we can beat.
>>
>>686923071
Getting nudes from girls 18th birthday posts on fb lol
>>
>>686922980
Three out of 40 plus
>>
>>686908407
I miss Hillary
>>
>>686922654
send more to [email protected] and I'll pay you via paypal
>>
>>686923071
wow so you're like a real life faggot huh?
>>
wish i had nudes
>>
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>>686923071
yeah sitting back and not doing anything is the worst thing we could do tbh. i've reported a few Nudes posts in this thread will carry on doing it every day until it flags up and hopefully they get banned
>>
>>686923285
he's len brown's daughter for any auck fags
>>
>>686923179
She's forever in our memories
>>
Any New Plymouth fuck bunnies out there?
>>
Threaten me on an anonymous anime image board again.

I dare you.

Reporting electronic crime
Reporting an e-crime is just like reporting any other offence.

First, you need to work out if the situation is an emergency.

Is the offence occurring right now or has it just occurred?
Is property in immediate danger of being damaged?
Are people in danger physically?
For example, if you have received an electronic message conveying an immediate and believable threat such as "I'm coming around now and I'm going to kill you", that would be an emergency.

If it is an emergency call 111 and ask for Police.
>>
>>686923179
hillary was a cuck
>>
>>686923435
I've been going through about 2 packets of durries a day for the last 4 years.

That's 2920 packets of durries and your comments are giving me more cancer...
>>
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>>686923435
you are such a fucking retard. being in the possession of nudes of people you don't own (you don't have permission to save them or distribute them) this is a form of cyber bullying and thousands of girls across the world take their own lives because basement dwelling virgins like yourself find it necessary to circulate nude photographs that you should never be in the possession of in the first place.

you should seriously rethink your life kiddo
>>
>>686923666
I'm not a nudesfag you deviltrip getting mother fucker.
>>
>>686923666
good they should end their existence
>>
>>686923666
I don't even give a fuck about the legality of it, Satan. I just hate that it derails the threads so hard. They should stick to making their own threads.
>>
>>686923840
The only way it derails the thread is because you guys spend the rest of the night complaining about it. Why not let the nudefags have their discussion and you can continue yours?
>>
>>686923666
>arguing morality on 4chan
yeah no one cares
>>
>>686923775
I agree

>>686923840
nudefags just piss me off. fucking salty basement cunts collecting their filth of nice women.
>>
>>686923840
Nudesfags are the only thing keeping these threads bumped half of the time.
Just let 'em do they thang.
>>
>>686923944
would you like me to create a daily NZ nudes fags thread for you? i'm quite happy to do so TalaMorgana fag. this is why goofbro etc left
>>
>>686908793
Perfect temperature here in Straya. Just cool enough to feel comfy under my blankie, just warm enough that I can take my blankie off.

Don't come here though, we like to feed our kiwis to the crocs, or if one escapes us, they are generally sorted out by natural selection in the harsh Australian desert.
>>
>>686924090
No because then both of our threads would shut down due to inactivity
>>
>>686923944
This was literally the first thing I have said on the matter and I agree with you. They should still fuck off and make a dedicated thread if there's so many. Just makes us all look trashy because they're always shit nudes.
>>
>>686924121
enjoy your abos, youe lebos, your terrorists.
fucking your country becoming islam nigga.

have fun without any rights unless you are a mudskin.
>>
>>686923955
either you just agreed girls who take nude pics of themselves should kill themselves or you are an idiot
>>
>>686924200
>1% of the population
>becoming islam
kek
>>
>>686922158
Now you're goooone, I realize my love for you was stroooooong
>>
>>686924121
Incorrect. Kiwis take most of your jobs because we actually work hard, and can manage a 40 hour work week. That's why you hate them. I say this as an Aussie living in Niu Zillund.
>>
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>>686924090
could this be the beginning of a NZ / nudesfags appartheid?
>>
>>686921909
Sonic
>>
>>686924326
>implying we Australians even need a job
>>
>>686921452
Omg wtf yes?
>>
>>686924354
hope so m8
>>
>>686924209
>Anonymous 05/31/16(Tue)00:36:38 No.68692
yes
>>
>>686924292
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6uJjrKWaeDs

nigga what?
do you even?
>>
>>686921909
Stellaris. You can kill a few hundered hours on a single game.
>>
Hey no zonzos need hot chick babe wife to life in Straaaya wit guy on disability pension, should he go to Christchurch or auklande?
>>
>>686924705
my notebook a shit.
I don't even know if I can run stardew valley yet.
Thread replies: 255
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