>implying your green text of foresight will stop me calling you the exact same thing you stated in spite
Gtfo summer fag

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>>686745285
>implying that it was even worth posting something OP already knows you're thinking

Page 9 and only thing thats come out of my thread are two faggots bickering about the least important thing I said.

nobody cares,just go and study

Like for real focus all of your energy on studying and that'll make a difference,fucking a girl isnt going to change much believe me.

>>686745057
Post stories faggot

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>>686746912
I thought you'd never ask...

>be me
>2nd or 3rd grade
>get ps2 with true crime streets of LA
>betterthangta.jpg
>become the edgiest child to walk the face of the earth
>in cafeteria and I am stopped by a bus driver because I didn't clean up my mess
>recite a line from the game
>"lets party!"
>then proceed to try and round house kick him in the face
>light up sketcher hits the tender underbelly
>bus driver looks at me with a "u dun goofed" face
>drags my crying ass to the prinicpal's office


That's where it all began

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>>686747783
For fuck sake anon this is 10x better than anything in a ylyl thread keep posting

>>686745057
sooo focus on the puss and not call of duty? get a phone? get some spending money? woo her? get that nut?

Just because of that fucking hilarious story
Literally be the biggest attention seeker, just not the faggot kind just like a "Hey look anon loves xxxl dildos aswell" kind of way, maybe stalk and see if you can find bands she likes or some gay shit like that...anything that will catch her eye but not make you look autistic......my personal favourite is light up heelie sketchers

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>>686748050
glad my social failures that lead to a life of ostracism are of your enjoyment.

>be me
>same year as last post
>in the bathroom
>break the 11th commandment
>I started pissing in the urinal right next to another kid when there were plenty of free ones around
>Decide to strike up a conversation about how Bully on ps2 was awesome
>mummsies thought gta was to violent after my failed roundhouse
>I was very young and my aim wasn't so good
>start to piss on my jean shorts
>didntnotice.png
>kid looks over starts laughing
>Look down, stream slowly stops
>start crying
>mfw I have to sit in piss soaked jean shorts for an hour so mom can bring me some new ones

>>686748362
I have been focusing on the puss since 9th grade. No dice.

>>686748993
why is it no dice? just talk to random chicks. do any of them talk to you? Friends have any single chix looking to mingle?

>>686748993
also facebook got me laid 90% of the time in school, add randos. Chat em up, snapchat, get nudes, have sex

>>686748993
dear sweet jesus anon too much I can't fecking breath same guy as before btw >>686748050
please keep them coming

>>686748993
just tell her your dick size and ask if she is down with a quick bounce

you have nothing to lose faggot

>>686749326
This

>>686748993
More stories

>>686749911
if he has em

>>686749326
What if my dick size is... less than satisfactory...

>get a phone
>texts bishes and stalk fb qts all day

>>686750043
This

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>>686749178
either they are with chads or are too ugly for me, I would rather stay a virgin than fuck them

>>686749307
bon appetite

>be me
>a year or so after previous posts
>get courtesy invited to a birthday party of a kid I austisticly followed around
>call him J
>mom drops me off in front, ready to play some fucking pokemon
>I was being super spazzy that day so the kids just ignored me
>I was infatuated with anything to do with GI Joe and loved the military (tanks and shit)
>worecamoclotheseveryday.xcf
>made him a homemade submarine card with a blue pen (no present)
>he just tosses it aside like any kid should
>I start to cry a bit
>his mom calms me down '
>we go outside to play and I go by myself to a tree and start crying some more
>I realize that all the kids are looking at me and laughing
>start wailing
>mom has to come and pick me up
>through puffy eyes I played jak and daxter 3 alone

>>686750022
not me

>>686749911
nice dubs, takes a lot of time to type these motherfuckers

>>686749985
oh I have em

>>686750022
1 get some apples
2 extract the cyanide
3 put it in her drink
4 rape her when she is brain dead
5 ???
6 profit

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>>686750229
remember how I said I liked military shit?

>be me
>around same time as last post
>get socom 2 us navy seals
>stupid kid so I can't get past the first mission
>J has the game too
>said he played it a couple of times
>see him as the sensei on top of a mountain
>constantly ask him for game info at school
>I get his phone number and call him
>he talks me through the first level like Morpheus in the matrix
>call him the next day
>no answer
>call again
>again
>again
>98missedcalls.blend
>mom gets a call
>mom puts phone in a place I can't reach with my 8 year old arms
>Kids at school don't talk to me and the teachers watch me like hawk
>get sent to counseling

it's about to git gud anons

try bumping a bit eh? I can't type fast enough.

>>686751494
Bumped

>>686751494
Bumping for more gold.

>>686751494
I can't for the life of me understand why you haven't an heroed yet.

Anon I am literally in the middle of a fucking depression episode and you are making me happier than I have ever been, please post more my fucking god you sound like a legend

bump for autism

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>>686751650
My self esteem has gotten so low that I just don't give a fuck what anybody thinks of me anymore...

>be me
>put into counseling
>sort of like a therapist but with no training
>got to get out of one of my classes for it and I was completely down with that shit
>it was a college girl who would ask me about my problems and shit
>9/10 from what I can remember, wasn't as interested in pussy as I am now
>Made a "worry" box so I could put my worries in it
>made a happiness poster so I could look at it and get happiness
>real faggy shit
>would always cry when we got to talking about how I suck at socializing
>would always show the other kids at school my dope ass shit
>they were pretty jealous that I was emotionally unstable and got to make bitchin boxes during music class (music wasn't as fun as you would think)
>short term ectasy
>long term reprocussions

she ended up having to leave and I got a new qt 3.14 college babe to here my sob story

>>686752164
just know that no matter how much you fuck up in your social life, you always have video games and anime

>>686752781
Welp good enough for me. Bump.

>>686752781
Alright mate, we need more. Diamond tier stories

>>686753439
1 of these stories is worth like 15 stories.

>>686753497
Well yeah

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More OP

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continuing with the counseling stories

>be me
>new college babe
>as hot as the last one
>she brings in a recorder so she can show this to professors I guess
>little me doesn't give a fuck if he gets out of class to fingerpaint

a lil backstory: My father is bipolar and is batshit insane. he was a pro bull rider and was in prison multiple times. Refused to take meds, showed up at school a few times and I had to leave. Haven't seen him in about a decade. Didn't really know him well enough to miss him.

>college babe asks me about him
>i start spilling my guts and crying as per usual
>she says some bullshit like "it is good to let it all out"
>socially inept me takes this the wrongest of all possible ways
>part 2 in a sec

I am scared that those recordings of me are being analyzed by college kids across the country. Will definitely an hero if I find out that happened.

>>686753804
why of course

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Is anyone screencapping this shit?

have every story copied down to a folder, I fucking love this shit anon please keep it up

>>686753903
Holy shit. It just keeps getting better.

>>686754337
post it on funny junk and see how many pinkies you get faggot

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part 2 of >>686753903

>with my newfound knowledge of "letting it all out" i returned to art class
>started work on my clay bird, looked pretty good
>whole class is there; claying away
>poor baby me made a big mistake that day
>"so my dad is bipolar..."
>the whole story is let loose like floodgates opening
>tears.bat
>teacher was out of the class room so I just kept going
>"and then he locked me in the motel room..."
>all of them stopped making their clay masterpieces
>blank stares
>I get sent home because of too much crying
>play midnight club 3: dub edition remix

>>686754601
it doesn't stop for awhile

>>686754542
thanks for the archive, hope this doesn't bite me in the ass one day

as I type these out I want any 12 year old autists like me to stop everything they are doing and get on the road to recovery. It took awhile but I eventually became a socially acceptable human being.

>>686754916
>I eventually became a socially acceptable human being.
Are you sure OP? I mean, you are on 4chan

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This isn't much of a fail but more of a win

>be me
>in class with same kid that saw me piss my pants
>a couple years later

I don't want to say I got bullied by anybody because I was a very "sensitive" child but this guy was a total cunt to me, always tried to single me out with his friends and laugh at me. Being the kid I was what could I expect?

>maths
>he is talking shit to me in class
>he is asked to go up to the board to do a problem
>as he was walking past me I had my legs out and he tried to plow through them to be an asshole...
>it would have been fine if I didn't put my leg in between his mid stride
>falls flat on his face
>broken nose
>gets up and throws my books across the room and gets sent to the office
>not gonna lie, made me pretty happy
>he tells everyone in school that I did it on purpose to bully him
>now I am binky barnes and no one will talk to me

>>686755168
good point

someone get some porn webms up, need more bump

>>686755168
Not OP here.

4chan has kinda become the loney evenings club.
The reddit cancer is really bad but you don't have to be an emotionally unstable weeabo to hang out here.

>>686755879
well in between the child porn and the autistic faggots there might be normal people here

>>686745057
start running
go to gym if you're skinny already

what are you good at OP?

>>686756097
Yeah. I also feel alot of people just assume that
if you're not autistic or a pedo you're a newfag.
If you're mature enough you'll fit right in.

what i want you to do is write down all of your strengths, and all of your weaknesses. Then, with an emphasis on positivity, work on honing your strengths and getting better at things you're not so good at. I would say it's too early to show an interest in this girl, and that even if anything comes of it it won't last. Remember that she is human and has her own flaws. For now, focus on yourself and becoming someone you like. 18 is very young, and everything else will fall into place once you start working on yourself.

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Do you know what a boscoe cheese stick is? I dunno if they served them at other schools but for those of you that don't know, it is a breadstick with stringy cheese in the center. about the size of a well endowed nigger.

>be me
>a year before I tripped cunt mcgee
>eating in the cafeteria
>boscoe day
>everyone's favorite
>the boys and the girls pretty much self segregate themselves to different tables
> I sit with the girls because I get picked on at the boys table
>when I was eating my boscoe I put it down a little to far
>deepthroat.kra
>vomit all over my tray and the people around me
>whole cafeteria is in utter disgust
>go home early
>take a bath
>play ratchet and clank: going commando

>>686756330
I actually am right now, I used to be 235 this time last year, now I'm 180 but still out of shape. gym costs money. I have no money.

>>686756365
believe it or not I'm pretty smart. I don't get As because I am a bit nihilistic when it comes to doing homework but I am the captain of the scholarbowl team if you know what that is. think of me as a special snowflake that is actually special.

>>686756827
Holy shit dude you have a strong mind.
Alot of people just consider an hero when they can't get laid in eight grade.

I pray for your gains.

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this one isn't as cringey as the other because it is more recent. High School doesn't hold that many stories for me.

>be me once again
>freshman
>I live in an extremely southern area, filled with baptist christians
>to piss off everybody... (i was in a phase)
>I came out as an atheist and started wearing a fedora to school
>last bit isn't true but it probably should've been
>In the beginning I was pretty militant about it
>getting into arguments
>one day I'm in english and everbody surrounds me and starts to argue with me
>too many for one lone fedora
>teacher has to break it up
>principal tells me to shut my mouth and stop causing problems

I still am an atheist to this day, just not a fat fedora wearing cunt anymore.

>>686756744
thanks ;)

>>686757106
is it really that bad?

This is putting a strain on my fingers,

>>686756827
>plays ratchet clank
This is bullshit, there's no way you remember the exact video game you played after each one of these incidents, and that kinda calls you'll whole story into question. Anyway they're entertaining, so keep 'em coming if you can.

>>686756827
you should start running either way
you'll just spend that 1 hour on doing something other than doing nothing, and boost your self esteem a little

>>686758022
Nah I have a friend who's a bit like you. It isn't that bad. I still hope you get that female procreation organ though and #gains.

>>686758022
>is it really that bad.
It is pretty bad. But you seem like a decent human being now. God knows I've met some cringe worthy autists (I've been into tabletop, rpgs and such) and none of those seem to have developed any kind of selfawareness or reflection. So kudos.

Also keep up with the stories.

>>686758022
you can always try to join the russian maffia and get some of that eastern european prostitute pussy

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this one isn't as cringey as it is funny

>be me
>3rd or 4th grade
>our class had one real autistic kid and a downy
>downy had this pencil that was as thick as ron jeremy's cock
>thought it was unique and cool so I decided to take it
>hard to believe, but stealing from a downy isn't that hard
>Hear the tard wrangler ask where it was
>gets mad at the downy for losing it
>is that a retard pencil in your pants or are you just happy to see me?
>decide that it would probably not be a good idea if I use it in class so it just sits in my dresser to this day
>the first of many things that I have stolen over the years

>>686758051
I just remember the games I played when I was in grade school and I pick from that bunch

>>686758666
thank you satan, I sort of see my life as a comedy and I still keep laughing at it.

>>686758722
duly noted

Bumping this shit

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Believe it or not, I actually got a girlfriend.

>be me
>7th grade
>new girl that didn't know my troubled past
>homecoming dance she asked to be my girlfriend
>she was not pretty
>I didn't even like her that much
>YASSSS.exe
>6 months of shy me sitting next to her at lunch
>I was so scared I couldn't even hold her hand
>I was still a little young for my dick to be making my decisions
>eventually she dumped me
> i didn't really care
>she asked to be my girlfriend again 2 times after that
>no
>NO
>she called me faggot quite a few times in highschool and she got expelled for to many fights

She wasn't that bad on the eyes so I am kinda kicking myself today for not tapping dat

Anyone still here? were in page 9 again /b/ros and I am getting high on all this attention that I am receiving

>>686759063
Why the heck do you still have it?
Are you trying to hold onto you're memories from you perfect past?

>>686760126
Keep it comming

>>686760126
bumping because i cant life

>>686760126
Fukin bump dude. You got more chicks than me in 7th grade.

>>686760596
bumping because this applies to me as well

>>686760777
i got triples post another story op

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bumping and a sort of porn webm

Bump?

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This is another win,

>be me
>7th grade again
>running down the halls to get to lunch
>usually first in line but this cunt whose birthday I went to (not J, will post after this) tried to shove me out of the way
>call him D
>think of him as a rival in school, he was a real bastard to me
>so he shoved me into a wall
>it was a little shove, nothing to severe but I got pissed
>right hook to the jaw
>didn't know my own strength so I ended up crumpling him
>a teacher comes over and he gets back up quick
>this still pisses me off to this day, guess what this cunt said?
>"i din do nuffin, he just started hitting me"
>I tell the truth because I didn't give a fuck about detention
>we go to the principal's office and we each explain our side of the story separately
>He goes first and I know he is lying, he comes out crying
>surprisingly I didn't start crying
>I basically "better call saul'd" the fuck out of the principal
>out of school suspension down to a lunch detention
>gained quite a bit of respect from that incident and that helped me in highschool

>>686760144
it looks cool

>>686760923
close enough

fun fact: I almost had a chance with his gf my freshan year because she was also a transfer who didn't know how fucked up I was

>>686747783
thats funny as fuck alpha/10

Only shit op, you are a real fag that cares way too much. But you're stories are too funny, so I luv u.

>>686746657
This

Falling in love may change things but that doesn't happen in high school much.

Honestly sex isn't that important

its winter?

>>686762571
wait. nevermind

>>686761905
bumping because you are a mighty fine niggerfaggot

>>686761905
How many stories are left OP?

are you diagnosed with autism, or just guessing?

Bumping for more gold

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you know that sweat you get on your lower back when you sit too long? I have that right now. sorry for being late

Birthday Cry 2: retribution

>be me
>maybe 3rd or 4th grade
>go to Ds house for birthday
>had a real card this time (still no present)
>The whole time I stared at the most amazing thing to grace my sight
>in the basement the father had this model train set
>town
>mountains and shit
>big as a pool table
>I start fucking with it, as a kid would
>dad comes down and starts yelling at me
>I start crying and run back up
>normal enough
>mom grabs him by the testicles and makes him apologize
>I start to calm down and D shoots me in the face with one of those guns with the crcles
>hits my upper lip and I start freaking out
>mom makes him hug me
>went home
>played spy hunter 3:nowhere to run

>>686762378
I don't really believe in love but I do believe in getting my dick wet.

>>686763064
it's all I ever wanted

>>686763079
a near infinite amount but I am getting pretty exhausted from all this typing and it is time for my daily run. here is my equally autistic youtube channel, i plan on uploading some better stuff later on https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCR-lkbZ-q9Sn1cOlrsS9TFA

>>686764028
no, i think I just wasn't prepared for public school and I couldn't adjust to it. I'm planning on moving a few thousand miles away to start a new life.

Thanks for the attention anons, it makes me happy that you enjoyed these stories. farewell

>>686765038
You channel reeks cringe. But when you speak you sounds.. so.. surprisingly reasonable

>>686765038
Why'd you want voice changing? You sound fine fam

Thread started out week but is now gold.
Op is based