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>I was only 9 years old
>I loved the cancer banana so much, I had all the .jpgs and .webms
>I eat so many bananas every night before bed, thanking them for the life I've been given
>"Cancer is love" I say; "Cancer is life"
>My dad hears me and calls me a faggot
>I know he was just jealous of my devotion for the banana
>I called him a cunt
>He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep
>I'm crying now, and my face hurts
>I lay in bed and it's really cold
>Suddenly, a warmth is moving towards me
>It's the cancer banana
>I am so happy
>He whispers into my ear "I really really like this image."
>He grabs me with his powerful banana hands and puts me down onto my hands and knees
>I'm ready
>I spread my ass-cheeks for the cancer banana
>He penetrates my butt-hole
>It hurts so much but I do it for the dank memes
>I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water
>I push against his force
>I want to please the banana
>He roars in a mighty roar as he fills my butt with his potassium
>The radiation gives me anus cancer
>My dad walks in
>The banana looks him straight in the eyes and says "It's all yours my friend."
>The banana leaves through my window
>Cancer is love. Cancer is life.

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>>685135424

>>685135762
>tumblr
fuck off faggot

>>685135631
>>685135678
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

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>>685135783
Oy vey

>>685135678
There he is. There he goes again. Look, everyone! He posted it once again! Isn't he just the funniest guy around?! Oh my God.

I can almost see your pathetic overweight frame glowing in the dark, lit by your computer screen which is the only source of light in your room, giggling like a like girl as you once again type your little Banana thread up and fill in the captcha. Or maybe you don't even fill in the captcha. Maybe you're such a disgusting NEET that you actually paid for a 4chan pass, so you just choose the picture. Oh, and we all know the picture. The "epic" Banana guy, isn't it? I imagine you little shit laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your Doritos on the floor, but it's ok, your mother will clean it up in the morning. Oh, that's right. Did I fail to mention? You live with your mother. You are a fat fucking fuckup, she's probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all goddamn day, every day, for a grown man who spends all his time on 4chan posting about a fucking banana. Just imagine this. She had you, and then she thought you were gonna be a scientist or an astronaut or something grand, and then you became a NEET. A pathetic Bananafag NEET. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can't even try to talk with you because all you say is "I REALLY REALLY LIKE THIS PICTURE." You've become a parody of your own self. And that's all you are. A sad little man laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old dance that he's done a million times now. And that's all you'll ever be.

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Goodnight Sweet Prince

>>685135631
>NAME A VEGETABLE
>carrots
I don't think that worked like it was supposed to.

>>685135678
I have never actually won a single one of these threads. Everytime I see that comically anthropomorphized banana holding his peel in a suggestive manner, likening the peel to clothes and his peel-less nature to human nudity, I bust up laughing. This happens every time, no matter where I am, be it the house or the bus or in class. Sometimes I laugh just thinking about it. This is a dark memory but a few months back I had just gotten done with a fit of laughter caused by one of these hilarious threads. Suddenly my mom walks in and she's crying. I attempted to suppress the growing urge to laugh but it was getting more difficult. Face red, tears running down her aging face, mom grabs my shoulders and says "Your father's dead."

It was at that moment that I couldn't hold back anymore. I burst into a banana-induced fit of laughter, but the horrible news drew tears to my eyes. I laughed while I cried, tears streaming down my wide open grin, memories of daddy resurfacing and being melded and combined with the naked banana.

I lost two things that night.

>>685135912
He spooked the doggo. He should have noticed how stupid the animal is and realized fast movements would spook it.

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Truly enjoyable

who invented bananas??????????????

>>685135631
I seriously said banana

>>685136777
i don't think you know what a vegetable is

also checked

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>>685135993
> Carrots
Same here.

>>685135631
I really, really, really like this image.

>>685135988
Gaben is love
Gaben is life

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Guess

>>685137848
Pikachu

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>>685137932
Yes, thou have keen eye

>>685136777
Me too, I'm sad at myself

>>685136037
You're going to die soon.

>>685135631
Is it bad that I said "Stephen Hawking" when it asked me to name a vegetable?

>>685138405
I always wondered, how can this be so wrong on so many levels? I mean giving a the name "winter champs" to caviar, but calling a Banana "Apple" this one I cannot explain...

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>>685138579
Nice edges.

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David Bowie is a fucking legend.

>>685138658
jesus

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>>685138927

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>>685138927
>>685138963

>>685136429
Kek

>>685135631
I thought "corn".

>>685135838
Omg this is epic

That Bowie shit real? Fucking beautiful anon thank-you.

>>685137794
This is methanphetamine.

Welcome to the world.

>>685136063
wut?

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>>685136063

>>685139938
Good clean humor.

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>>685135424

>>685137106
Like a boss

>>685138475
read them in his voice cant stop shitting myself topkek

>>685138658
Holy shit

>>685136624
Paranormal black-tivity

>>685136106
Cancer banana is actually good. Something to bump with so thread doesn't die.
Also, after a million of them it gets funny. I sweer guise.

>>685136069
What were those two things?

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>>685136429
Obligatory

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>>685136163
Nice one. Didn't get me though.

>>685138177
ahahahhahah my fucking sides

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>>685136429

>>685141224
Rally round the family with a pocket full of shells

>>685141302
lost - file name did it

>>685136069
Only one thing left to do, kill yourself.

>>685135631
I said cow. Was expecting a different question

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>>685135424

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>>685135424
Lol

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>>685141919

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moar

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>>685141492
Explaining it to my GF over skype

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.

>>685135983

Surprisingly accurate. kek

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>>685136330

>>685135424
Wtf?

>dem kidz iz fagotz

>>685136210
"he should have known"

Niggah he is the dog whisperer, he knows everything that dog was just a fucking retard.

>>685135631
Wtf?

>dem kidz iz fagotz

>>685135814
hello newfriend

>>685135762
Wtf?

>dem kidz iz fagotz

>>685137794
inb4 even that guy gets a blowjob