>>684815224
>high pressure piss to clean stains off the toilet

EVERYONE DOES THIS

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>high pressure piss to clean stains off of toilet..

I think every man does this.

>high pressure piss to clean stains off of toilet

Its the best way to clean.

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>>684815224
Tickle my back/asscrack while i pee so i get the shivers wich resaults in high pressure piss.

>>684815224
Bump

>>684815224
I guarantee, evwrything you listed, at least 1M people do too. Youre not thst special faggot

Shit in the sink then transfer it to the toilet using toilet paper tubes that I've saved up from each time my toilet paper runs out.

>>684816171
wow got to try this

also >>684815224

i do high pressure wash of my toilet also

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>>684815224
edge my asshole when i need to shit

Stand when I wipe.

Found out after 20 years most people don't do this. How the fuck do you niggers wipe sitting down? How doesn't your hand touch the shit?

>>684817126
How do you not get shit on your lower back???

>>684817126
U are not the only one

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>>684815627
He already said that faggot

>>684817126
Because we arn't all fat fucking amerifats

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Sometimes after I've been edging my bung dunker before a massive shit I'll slam my ass down on the toilet seat and if I time it just right the inertia is transferred to my shit delivery

>>684817232
You don't wipe that far retard. Plus how shitty is your ass after taking a shit that it can spread to your lower back?

> fucking hate myself
> consider suicide a couple times an hour
> masterbate to traps n shota on occasion

>>684817431
>we all arn't all fat fucking amerifats
>arn't
>implies i'm a fat fucking amerifat for standing when I wipe

What were you even trying to get at?

>>684815224
>Things that only you do thread

before i piss, i get one single square of toilet paper and set it in the water so that it remains flat and square

then i attempt to shoot one single piss shot at the center

if i'm successful, i get to piss in the sink

>>684815224

>I'm really pedantic so I basically finger my asshole after I take a shit until there is nothing left

>>684817126
>How doesn't your hand touch the shit?

how large of a shit do you put in there?

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>>684815224
>Things that only you do

Newfag.

>>684815224
>when I'm excited/nervous I slap my hands against the top of my head really really fast
>feels good when i get an alternating pattern going
>feels not as good when they're synchronized
>because of the speed i slap at I can't fully control how synchronized they are
>I'll leave to go to the bathroom just to do this because it's really relaxing

Otherwise I'm pretty fucking normal, there's just a thread of insanity tying me back her to /b/

>uncut
>I fap by holding my foreskin between my thumb and index finger, and by squeezing the rest of my cock with the rest of my fingers so when I cum it gets trapped in this little space in my foreskin
>after that, I keep the "fap seal" closed and just dump it all in the toilet

I save a lot on toilet paper this way.

>>684816171
Ditto

Steal/collect pylons

Been doing it for years, I keep them in my closet.

>>684818266
Pics or its bullshit

>>684815224
>twiddle my fingers against each other at 1000mph whenever i get excited and nervous
How's life with autism?

>>684818156
you're not the only one

>>684818266
>Steal/collect pylons
I do this and give them to people for their birthdays or just end up hiding them in friend's bathrooms

>Jack off and take shits at the same time
>Keep headphones on ears for extended periods of time after songs are over
>Attempt to draw on graphing paper in random sequences
>Have a "buzz" that I can activate behind my ear drum somehow almost like I'm breathing through ear canal
>Buzz gets super excited on acid

>>684815224
Seen as we got a bit of debate on wiping standing vs sitting I got one

>start wiping sat down until most of the shit is gone
>finish with satisfying standing wipe to get the last of it

When I started batting for both teams, I opened up a world of marvel and opportunity.

>>684817747
Well sometimes I blast onto the back of the shitter bowl. But I typically piss when I take a dump so I don't want my hand touching that water. Seems like my taint would get all shitty if I wiped sitting down

>>684818596
Wtf is a pylon?

>if I have to piss and shit, I first stand up and piss then sit to shit.

>after I'm done showering but havnt stepped out yet I wipe and squeegee the water off my body with my hands so I'm not soaking wet when I get out.

>put excessive amounts of pepper on everything I eat, take what would be alot, and multiply it by 2-5x.

>wash my hands excessively, many many times a day

>>684817581
thats not only you bro

>>684818727
Fuck off UK fag.

>>684817996
This is beyond autism, this is fucking /b/tism

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>>684818727

>>684818687
I have mostly the same technique


you just honestly get it effectively better clean when you stand imo.

>>684817686
You're supposed to do this, people who don't are gross. Every girl I've dated wiped her as so good I couldn't even smell or taste shit when I licked their ass, even right after shitting.

>>684815818
the best way to clean is not need to clean

i do some toilet papers inside the toilet before i shit

>>684818767
2 and 3 same here

>>684818156
That is a good way to permanently damage your dick

>>684817996
How retarded can you get? That's not insanity that's literally autism.

>Gargoyle poop/squat. I'm aware im not the only one but it's very uncommon. Even at work I do it.
>Call my cats fat faggots for no reason and ask them if they know of the destructive power of my ass (random shit I ALWAYS say when no one's around)
>Stand naked with my legs spread wide and thrust my hips back and forth so my cock and balls smack against my ass and stomach and make this loud slapping noise
(After every shower)
>Make weird little wagers/bets with myself. Ex: "Okay, if you don't make it past the dining room before the alarm for the food goes off you will die in 5 years. If you do make it you will have a fateful encounter with a hot chick sometime this week." The context is always different... Obviously most of the time the stuff doesn't happen.

>>684817663
You may be the only man on the planet to do this. Doesn't make you special, just retarded.

>>684817457

I have done this, anon.

>>684818767
I used to wash my hands alot when i was a teenager but i just kinda stopped

>wife suggests I fuck her butt, she wants to try anal, even bought lube.
>I kindly decline because it's gross.

>>684818767
>if I have to piss and shit, I first stand up and piss then sit to shit.
Ok what the FUCK

>>684816554
Why ?

>>684819061
>not satisfying your wife

have fun getting cucked shitlord

>>684819061
You faggot.

>>684817126
you know that you cant clean yourself properly while standing up becouse your asscrack is closed?

>>684818831
>
>>684818922
So a traffic cone, Thanks mate.

>>684819073
yeah man, I'm a little OCD...

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>>684819156
>>684819061

Eat a blob of Vaseline a day, your shits will shoot right out and not make a mess.

Or learn to use the three seashellls, John Spartan.

>>684818687
I do this mostly to get all the asscheek sweat off at the end. My ass sweats a ton when I shit for some reason. Actually it sweats all the time. When I jack off I end up in a puddle of ass sweat.

>>>I put a folded layer of TP on the front of the toilet bowl to prevent a UTI(my manager got one that way :/)
>>>Willing to look past butter/pizza-face to see to real beauty in women
>>>I want to freeze time, wrap it up, and fuck the shit out of the hot girls I pass and don't want to talk to.
>>>I keep my bathroom clean(better than hospitals)
>>>

>I eat the skin of my fingers around my nails etc.

Am I the only one?

>>684819239
safety cone/traffic cone/pylon etc. depends what you grew up calling it

>>684818975
I do that. More so to prevent splashback and the accompanying noise.

>>684819229
Clearly have never wiped standing, you don't stand straight. You do a half squat so your ass is open and you wipe.

>>684817232
We wipe up AND down

>>684817996
>otherwise im normal
you have autism anon

>>684818687
>>684818934

Please explain. Intriguing.

>>684818767
I used to work at a sandwich shop and this one guy would always ask me to put anbinsane amount of pepper on his sandwich. I can't imagine him tasting anything other than pepper when he ate it. I mean it would literally last for about a minute and a half before he told me to stop.

> I do not shave my dick, I pluck the pubic hair with tweezers one by one, lasts for month and half but hurts like hell
> I put honey in my scrambled eggs
> when walking outside with someone else, I need to walk on the right, otherwise I'm really nervous

>>684819353
this is the other reason i do it

we are like brothers

>>684819229
That's why you stick your ass out like youre doing a squat. You don't just stand perfectly vertical and wipe.

>>684819253
nah u just a stupid cunt

>>684819332
I do that too. i also tend to pull out my eyelashes and eyebrows andeat them too.

>>684819351
I've never heard anyone call it a Pylon in the UK

>>684818922
you mean cones?

>>684817996

OP here

This is what i meant when i said dwiddle my fingers.

Like i cant contain the excitement so ill slap against my head or my thighs really fast and in a rhythm

When i get home and see my dog, ill literally blast beat against my legs with both hands

My doggo loves it

>speak a lot with myself and tell myself jokes

I doubt anyone do this, I've been keeping it a secret

>>684819541
kek'd

>>684819421
hehe sure do but I manage it pretty well
been studying you humans for a while
i know your ways

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>>684818388

>>684819682
Talking to yourself to an extent while doing work related stuff is a good sign of a sane mind.

>>684819613
Nice I really thought I was the only one, my fingers look like shit all the time.

>>684819697
ayyyyyy

>>684819513
Brothers in defecation. Nice to finally meet you.

>>684819682
Is this bait?

>>684819783
Top Kek

>>684819332
I've been doing this a lot as a kid, abd stopped.
It's a bad habit

>>684819682
Think everyone does this. I like think to myself or I'll think of a funny scenario related to what I'm doing in my head or think of something funny that happened in the past. Natural thing anon, it's like talking to your conscious.

>>684819332
same

>>684819314
>When I jack off I end up in a puddle of ass sweat
this is especially annoying when on a long drive, which already makes your ass sweat
you end up feeling so gross when you get home

>>684819351
>>684819629
Pylons to me have always been those big things carrying power lines

>>684817581
everyone does these
source: i hate myself a lot

>i take my gauges out at least once a day and inhale the smell of decaying flesh.
>i refer to myself as "we" when im thinking to myself
>99% of the time i smell the shitty toilet paper i just used to wipe my ass with

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>>684819061
you could have fucked her in her ass, dominated her, and become an alpha male. + she would feel like a slut and cum extra hard.

now she will find someone else to fuck her ass. enjoy the divorce, retard.

>>684819632
Yes, doggo understand happy slaps very good
I've never met anyone else who did it (or admitted they did) but a nurse told me she sees weird crap like that all the time. I'm glad I can control it but I still do it when I can/want to

daydream about living in my own world having everything i ever wanted, or just daydreaming about being someone I think is really cool, but to access this fantasy life I have to do something really repetitive with my hands / fingers. like play with a yoyo, spin something around in my fingers, or play a really repitive arcade game.

>>684819912
also

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I love eating dandruff

>>684817044
amen bro

>>684817663
Sounds like a fun thing to do. And thus a new piss-minigame was born by your mind.

>>684819783
Fucking lel

>>684815224
I drink milk every time I shower

>>684819332
everyone does that

>>684819928
I'm skinny enough that I lean on one cheek while I drive, it gives enough air flow to keep me kinda dry.
Gets super sore after a long drive though, even if I alternate. I'm gonna invent ass-anti-antiperspirant.

>>684819986
just get a septum piercing and dont clean it, anon

>>684820036


Dogs are badass lol I've never been caught or had to explain it.

Do you speak to your dog exclusively in falsetto voices?

I do

>>684819147
Probably to clean up his ass. Only ligical explination i could think of

>>684819632
Yeah, you have autism.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stimming

>>684817996
do you also sometimes pretend to be a dinosaur in public?
I think I met you in college

Constantly stress about one thing or another (usually changed every couple months)

OCD about talking / walking / standing in a feminine manner

Takes forever to get over a lost friendship or just a arguement with a friend / family member (constantly think about it for days weeks or months)

>>684820481
kek

>>684815224
any more of this girl? what country??

>>684820423
you can lean on one cheek, drive, and jack off at the same time?
That's quite the balancing act!

>>684819031
>You may be the only man on the planet to do this.

>Things that only you do thread
>Things that only you do thread
>Things that only you do thread

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>>684819332
I do it too. It is so hard to stop
Pic related

>>684820747
Nah man saved it from a random thread


Fat ol fur burger hanging out tho

>high pressure shit to clean piss off toilet

>>684819986
That's fuckin gross

>>684819486
>> I put honey in my scrambled eggs
I might have to try this
I like when syrup from pancakes runs into the eggs a little, so I can imagine it is good

I have been tempted to pluck pubes, but it seems like quite the time commitment

>>684816171
The best.

>>684820816
I don't eat mine, I just pick at it all day if I'm anxious or nervous or something. Both of my thumbs look like that or worse cause while is one is too tender I move to the other

>>684816171
Same, feels nice.

>>684817126
>>684817747
>>684819229
>>684819530
10/10 discussion. God damn it /b/

>>684819682
this is what most people refer to as "thinking"

>>684817126
i stand to wipe partially bc femanon partially bc i just do
its actually really common thing people learn in childhood
(also why a lot of people take their shirts/clothes off to poop)

>>684815224
When I walk I count up the number of steps I have taken on each unique material and each subset of said materials. When I have finished my journey I must have walked an equal number of steps on each material otherwise it bothers me and I sometimes head back on a loop to finish my journey on evens. Sometimes, when specific criteria are met, I have to walk an even number of steps on one patch of a single material, if I fail to finish on an even number of steps I will take an extra step on the spot to even it out. "Steps" are also measured in relation to the amount of pressure I applied on particular parts of my foot as I took the step. I must always keep an equilibrium of accrued pressure between both feet. If there isn't an equilibrium I must take several steps on the spot to specifically balance out the inequality in accrued pressure.

>>684820608
... sounds pretty normal/common, anon
My dad hated fags and scolded me for crossing my legs wrong and shit, now I embrace my femininity to some degree. Who gives a fuck!

Getting over people is hard for me too but weed and meditation helps. You can learn to be self-dependent and not depend on others for satisfaction to some degree. And as you get older it just hurts less.

>>684817126
I'll hit it a time or two when I'm sitting. A time or two when I'm standing. Then I finish it off with a captain morgan wipe, posed with one leg up on the seat.

>>684819783
Noice!

>>684820608
You're not the only one I do all 3

>>684815224
I pee while sitting

I divide my shitting sessions in 4 or 5 periods and I flush in between them because I'm afraid of clogging the toilet.

Sometimes I try to finger my asshole to see if there is poop coming out soon

>>684820554
In public? Oh god no. I hide in the bathroom to slap my head. When I'm alone I pretend to be all kinds of things though.

>>684821361
>also why a lot of people take their shirts/clothes off to poop
no one does this
I do not believe it

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>fuck myself in the ass with my cawk!!

>>684819442
Starting with a sat down wipe stops you smearing particularly messy shits on the insides of your cheeks when you stand. This is real useful if you have a particularly hairy ass where poo crumbs can congregate. So you get the danger zone clear before you stand.

Then, when you stand, you have a better view of the paper so you know if you're done or not better. Plus, standing feels better, so you get that satisfying wipe feeling alongside a thorough and efficient sat-down wipe.

>>684821671
guess you're not the only one to do it then
find comfort in the fact that it could be worse

>>684821779
I do it lol

I really can't take a dump with my pants around my ankles

sometimes I remove my t-shirt for convenience

>>684821415
Thanks for advice anon helps more than you know

let my cats smell my dick so I can see their stupid face afterwards

>>684821922
I just...
but...
god damn it

>>684820481
>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stimming
hey neat! theres a word for it

>>684821779
>>684822134
lol i was surprised nobody had said it yet. super common thing

>>684817287
new fag, it was green text, he was quoting him dumb fuck

>>684817996
I do it, too.

>>684821415
I agree with all of this

as far as the feminine leg cross type stuff, I have noticed that when most of my old friends make fun of me for it, and I'm confident and say "fuck off, it's comfortable" they usually shut up right away and I catch them doing the same thing shortly after

I bite my hand and every one of my fingers in the part closest to the hand when I think or when I'm anxious.

I think women are people

>>684822161
>>684822734
>the sheer amount of people in this thread learning they are autistic

>>684822515
>green text is for quoting
cancerfag

>>684821894
It's not bad at all, I'm very happy to be only mildly autistic. My older brother on the other hand is practically disabled. Feel like I dodged a genetic bullet.

>>684818654
Superhero confirmed: The Buzz

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>>684822874

>>684821453
BROTHER...

>>684821779
Op here

I actually negated mentioning it originally because i was like nahhh everyone does that

Fear or OCD that Imight be a repressed gay or bi

Constantly try and 'test' if im gay by looking at other guys in public or try and masterbate to gay porn

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>>684822874
its not always for quoting but that is how he used it in this instance, you fucking neckbeard

>>684815224
When I'm bored, to waste time, I lay on my back in bed. Sounds boring, but the point is that I start snoring at the same time I start drifting away. It's IMPOSSIBLE for me to fall asleep and I'm constantly in the zone between awake and asleep. I can wake up anytime I want. It's basically like the wait function in online games.

I wipe my asshole till it bleeds. Sometimes i will wet the toilet paper first for a better clean.

Sometimes randomly my asshole will itch and I will stop what I'm doing, go to the bathroom, and wipe my ass. Also I do both sitting down and standing up.

>>684815224
Damn, that's hot man. I don't like hairy pussies, but this is definitely an exception.

>>684822734
I intertwine my fingers and squeeze them against each other then slide them all down each other and rub my knuckles together

>>684822874
>who are you quoting?

>>684822161
Lmao OP here again


Ive been doing this since i was like 4 (fast hand slaps or finger twiddling) and I also have been professionally diagnosed with social phobia


I dont "feel" autistic though! How do you test for that?

> smell my bellybutton. it's not a good or bad smell
> Whenever alone, no matter where I am, I always start bustin' out little dance moves and jiggin
> on random days I choose not to eat, and I don't know why

>>684823332
Sounds awesome, does time go by fast when you do this?

> Always biting nails/skin around them
> Whenever i get home i check my tailbone indent and belly button for lint/hair
> Rip out the soles of my Vans
> Get fully naked before taking a shit, usually only shirt off if i'm not at my home
> Check every room in my house if i come home and nobody else's car is in the driveway

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>>684822772

>>684818767
I do 2 and 4 just like you

>>684818266
>>684818596
>>684819629
>>684818727

Additional pylons?

>>684823495
I didn't quote him
I pointed out what he had implied

>>684823306
I'm not a neck beard
I was just pretending

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>>684819351
Nigga pls

>>684823586
Basically like sleeping. It's pretty nice, but the fact that I have so few to do with my time that I figured this out speaks for itself.

>>684819783

Shit son, Nice collection..

You should go block off a busy one way street with them one of these days.

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>>684819351

>>684822577
Yes, you only become a victim if you make yourself one/let yourself become one. Sometimes it can feel good to fill into the role of the heel of the group for a few laughs, but other people will always try to use this against you in the end and sense it as you being a beta to be picked on.

Always stand up for yourself if you're actually offended, don't seem butthurt or like you really care, but defend your position logically and truthfully. If you let others pick on you then it just builds and gets aggressive. You think they're just doing it when your together by yourselves but next thing you know they're doing it in front of others and you're losing face. Fuck being the heel, ever.

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>>684818922
These are pylons.
You'd need some size closet to put them in after stealing them

>>684822874
cute because thats been the primary reason besides implications forever

>>684816554
same.

>>684823972
I don't think he's 16 anon.

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>>684823880

Hate 90% of the posts on this stupid site and still come here.

>>684819629
Because we fucking don't.

>>684821361
Pic of your shitty ass or gtfo bitch

>>684823272
Guess you'll become gay by doing that. /b/ isn't helpful either. It made a vore loving furfag out of me, it may well make you gay

Wash my ass and balls with very hot water. It is very pleasurable sometimes.

>>684823557
I don't "feel" autistic either lol I'm just going along with the joke here that displaying any tendencies related to autism at all makes you a sperglord. They can't test it. Experts in it can talk to you for a long time and give you surveys and make abstractions from that but a different shrink might disagree. That shit isn't too concrete.

>>684823225
but you listed cleaning shit off the toilet with a piss stream anyway? fuck off

>>684824049
>implications aren't the only reason

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>>684819351

>>684817126
I stand too>>684817126

Reach back with my tongue to suck out mucus from my nasal passages or clean out tonsil stones

>>684818156
Enjoy your dick fromaj

>>684817686
yup. basically make the TP into a mini little enema and dig the leftover poo out of my sewage hole. you're not alone.

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>>684817825
>Bachelor Frog was 7 years ago

>>684824451
oh my

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>>684818156

>>684815224
Eat my toenails

Sniff the crust thats between my toes

Fap to traps

Vote for bernie

>>684817126
Wait, standing while wiping isn´t normal? WTF? I´ve been doing that my whole life

>>684824305
Idk how to stop. maybe a should just stop watching porn and fapping?

>>684815224
>when i shit i usually check the toilet if it have some bugs or other things
>traumatised in childhood when a fucking centipede crawling in the toilet while i was sitting on it

>>684823989
ur wise anon ud make a good parent

>>684824820
Why are you eating bugs tho?

>>684819073
I do the same.

I have an inner monologue which I use to describe everything I see, my opinions on the matter and usually snark about it. I´m Spanish, but I do all this in English.

>>684824778
Alien

>>684818156
I do something similar, before i nut i put a tight seal on my dickhole to keep the nut from escaping and continue with my thumb and the rest of my fingers to finish myself off then dump it on/in a rag/toilet.

>>684818962
>even right after shitting
Savage

Ever since I was about 5 I had this hoody that had a Saturn pattern on it in this hard bitty type plastic that cracked, I used to run it between my fingers, at the webbing and knuckle s and press the plastic points into my skin a little, I did it against my lips too.

Anyway over the years I lost the jumper but carried on with paper and wrappers and whatnot.

Getting a small piece of thin paper, twisting it up so its like a twisty pasta fusilli thing, fold it over and use the corner point..

My absolute favourite material for this is Extra chewing gum that has individual paper wrappers and the wrappers from Glacier Mints.

I literally fiddle the little fuckers into mushy grey paper bells that fall apart everywhere.. Very odd

My misses calls them "Your Fiddlers" and saves the wrappers / bus tickets and shit for me lol

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>>684818716
holy shit

>>684825210
kek. i always knew the spanish were fucking nuts

Dont like tucking my dick in the toilet while shitting so i usually just flop it on the seat, and if i need to pee whilst pooping i use an old shampoo bottle then pour it down the sink.

>>684820989
Sour cream in scrambled eggs is OP

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>>684820889
damn bro, looks just like a chick from fb

>>684824781
I wish I knew, or I wouldn't have become a freaking furfag. Fapping to the porn was my biggest mistake tho, I became curious and it creeped on me. Weird at first but now I'm all furry tentacle porn.

And it's so much more difficult to evade the constant stream of dick threads than to evade the fur. Good luck /b/ro.

...Or just embrace the gay, at least you can fuck someone real when gay. I'll never fuck an anthro shark.

I hold my breath very tightly when I cum. Makes me cum buckets and cum for as long as I hold my breath.

>>684818156
same but when i go to dump it in the toilet i fill my foreskin with piss like a balloon to keep it clean

>>684822001
No problem anon. Also just try to get some exercise in. It's like natural medication. Gives you lots of brain chemicals you need and might not be getting enough of. Helps you clear your head!

>>684815627
I'm a pro at that

>>684825693
kek, you must have a large dick then

>>684825694
I have done this
it's pretty great

>>684826185
N...Yes! Yes I do...

>>684815224
>high pressure piss to clean stains off the toilet


How the concept of the pressure washer was thought up.

>>684825678
Nah, Spaniards don´t usually do that. We barely know any English.

>>684818156
Fapped this way since I started fapping. Efficient, but damaging as fuck. Maintaining a boner becomes more difficult. I basically have to be fapping or inside a vagina to stay hard

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Sometimes when I burp, I end up reciting the entire initial monologue of MGS2, so it sounds more or less like

>BRRRRAAAAAAAAAdson river, two years ago...

>really don't like smoking weed
>every person i've ever spoken too loves it
>makes me really paranoid to a point where I cant even be in a room with someone else

>>684825443
I've had a girl stop to take a shit during an ass fucking, then come back and continue after lmao she was a freak

>>684824161
there is always one idiot around, like in this thread.

I think anal sex is disguising

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>>684815224
Use my feet to pick things up so I don't have to bend over. Been doing it for decades. Efficient and I can flip things (especially clothes up to my hands). I imagine look pretty weird when I'm in a hurry.

>>684826508
I'm like that too, but it's mainly because my friends are assholes and will fucking call you a retard for even sitting the wrong way. Much better just to do it alone and listen to some tunes. Trust me anonson.

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>>684815224
New Updated 2016 Tor/Deepweb Links! Enjoy!

>>684826896
I try it about once with every girl but yea its disgusting.

>Get toothbrush
>make it wet
>put toothpaste
>make it wet while I spread it around
>then wash my mouth
>in the shower

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>>684818767
Squeegee master race reporting in

>>684826997
it gets me the next day though. if i'm not doing anything for like 3 days if im on vacation or something and alone i really fucking enjoy getting baked

really dont understand how people can smoke every day. must have minds like rocks

>>684827504
>Cashew Apple
is this really a thing?
if so, this breaks my american-educated understanding of vegetables

>>684827130
... can you post a DOWNLOADABLE link fag?

>>684815224
>twiddle my fingers against each other at 1000mph whenever i get excited and nervous
>when i stretch, i count 1-30 in random sequences, speeding up and slowing down but still make it equal to 30 seconds

these are the direct signs of autism
>inb4 b8

>>684823572
You're not alone, i do all three

>>684827689
You're a fucking retard. it's a phising bot
fucktard

>>684827689
why are you responding to spam?

>>684816527
and you're not that clever, shitlord. way to not even try to contribute.

For the thread, I always turn on the burner under my cast-iron skillet when I'm washing the dishes. I think the smell of the grease makes me feel like i have to finish the dishes so I can cook; not really sure why I do it tbh.

>uncut

>sitting on a toilet
>taking a piss after masturbating (not a fag but I usually sit even to piss if I'm not in a rush because its more comfy)
>using my finger to close the skin of my Dick to create a 'bag' that gets filled by piss to wash away the cum-induced stickyness

>>684824908
giving advice on 4chan is the closest I hope to ever come to parenting
brb getting snipped

>>684817431
i feel like standing to wipe would be harder the fatter you get... so, I'm gonna go w/ you're a fucking retard who forces excuses to hate on americans

I keep shushing myself when I have bad thoughts.
Started relatively recently but it's become an almost instinctual thing. I'm really hoping someone else does this.

>>684818767
Connor?

>>684818654
holy shit... I forgot about this, but when you said acid it all clicked.

I used to do this a lot w/out thinking about it, but once, during a super hard trip, i was making the buzz and all of a sudden i got a pop and since then I can't do it. no idea what i fucked up inside my head, but i definitely broke something that day

>>684826729
hawt!

>>684819061
Your wife probably knew you would do this, and probably already had someone else in mind if you acted your usual cuck self and declined. Now she is guilt free and fucking her coworker. He is probably turning her on so much that she is getting him to fuck her friend before she gets them both to do her. You sir, are a fuck.ing. idiot.

>>684815224
i pay for the winrar lincese

>slam my head to back of the chair rapidly when laughing my ass off

I qualify myself as a retard.

>>684826508
>>makes me really paranoid to a point where I cant even be in a room with someone else
Yep, does the same to me nowadays. Loved weed for years, then got stimulant psychosis and now can't smoke it anymore. Anxiety attacks are now unavoidable, even with real good friends

Sucks.

>>684826997
You should get better friends dude