>>684688496
no

>>684688557
damn

As a girl.
No.
Posting Nudes online + being overweight.
Nah man, lose some weight and not post nudes online and you'll get yourself a respectable woman.

nah . you will have to stick with the little kids chained up in your basement

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Even if you lost tons of fat and gained a shit load of muscle you'd still have saggy ass skin. You rekt ur body for good m8

>>684688496
if by woman you mean a 12g in your mouth then yes fairly good chance

I'd fuck you.
But I'm a self destructive male.
Post moar sweet tiny pen0r.

>>684688496
no you don't, but there are some(rare as fuk) that have no self respect, like you, because you got so fat, and might not give enough fucks so you could kiss them. Get on a diet.

>>684688821
Yeah, at least there is always that to fall back on.

>>684688940
A 12g?

>>684688977
Dubs
Post moar

>>684688496
You're cute though, I'd go all faggot and suck your dick or let u hump my fartbox.

AS IN WOMEN YOU MEAN A DEAD CORPS THEN YES!!! YOU PIG

>>684688496
Why are all the non-bear fat guys straight? :^(

>>684689088
12 gauge you fuckwit

>>684689088
Dubs
12 gauge shotgun tubbyshit
Post more little penis pls

>>684689251
lol

Some girls like fat guys for some reason, so yes
In the end, there is someone who WILL love you for who you really are, you just have to find them

Yeah m8 just go to Japan and become a sumo wrestler

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>>684689264
>>684689128
>>684688977

>>684688672
>girl

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>>684688496
Do this. And almost stop eating (and if just healthy) for bout two years. That should fix it

>>684689405
... not a bad idea

>>684689238
I try to turn them gay
Aggressively
My success rate is low
0
POST MORE LITTLE COCK OP WHAT THE FUCK

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>>684688672

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>>684688496
I'd fuck u

bumping with my new watch.

>>684688496
How the fuck were you able to shave your dick and balls, from under that gut?

I shit you not I am a girl.

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>>684689407

>>684689407
I literally just came all in my pants imagining you skullfucking me.

>>684688496
I've seen fatter with hotter.
You need hella personality though.

>>684689666
... thank you?

>>684689666
calm down satan trips

>>684689493
>>684689416
Do you think the only people on 4chan are guys m8 :U

>>684688496
Of course you do fat fucker, you just need money, even self respecting women are women you know...

>>684689251
Im not a fuckwit for that
You are wrong if you disagree

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>>684688496
if you have a good personality, yes. But i'd recommend fucking in the dark

>>684689837
without tits and a timestamp yes.

>>684689666
Dustin?

>>684689837
no, i just know that you are not a female

>>684689666
Shiet satan would fuck you dude, count yourself lucky

>>684689775
I can't calm down, the dark Lord says I must turn trap and let him cuck me.

>>684689947
Riiiight.
Any proof that I'm not? :P

>>684689881
calm down tubzilla

can i get a girl without any reason for a girl to like me?

>>684690099
tits and timestamp then or gtfo

>>684690099
The burden of proof lays with the one who made the claim.

>>684690099
Girl?
Tits or Gtfo

>>684688496

No

I know fatter guys with wives that are somewhat decent

weather they have sex is a different question

>>684688496
You know you'd gain like 5 inches on your dick if you lost weight, right? Like a turtle scared in his shell, let him out.

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>>684690099
tits and timestamp then

nope, but you're in luck. There's plenty of self disrespecting women who would think they can't possibly do better.

>>684689893
'tis

You should start by respecting yourself before even considering that you fat disgusting shit.

>>684689375
>>684689375
Similar build and personality to OP detected. You'd be surprised how many women will not fuck you even if you have tons of money or are powerful if you're the same stature as OP.

If you want a woman who respects herself, respect yourself first and let them see that. A body let go like that means you don't respect yourself enough to even get in shape. I shouldn't talk because I've gained 10 lbs in the past year but I've always been fit and worked hard at it. You should be telling him to make himself respectable if he ever wants a shot at a respectable woman.

>>684689500
My god look at that fingerflab

>>684690099
Yes
The rules say so nigger

You need to lose some weight mr. Porker.

>>684688496
You don't even respect yourself, so no

Also I got laid on the wknd, be jealous

As you stand? I'm surprised you can stand at all

>>684689467
He could do that or he could just get a mail order bride

>>684688496
No. I'm a straight male but I'd fuck some dudes. I would not fuck you.

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>>684688496

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HAPPY NOW?

>>684690624
LOL

>>684688496
sorry bro but no, you're overweight and those tits are gross. lose some weight

>>684690582
Theres a reason they call cheap jokes cheap


They're shit

>>684690705
Nice timestamp, asshat.

>>684690705
Time stamp

Believe it or not there are women who don't care that much about looks. If you're confident, can make them laugh, don't smell and have at least a 5/10 face you can land some solid 7-8s

>>684690705
TITS AND TIME STAMP LEARN TO READ

>>684688496

Not even a little bit.

>>684690705
Timestamp stupid ass foo

>>684690705
More please
You look like you have a nice body
And timestamp is need too

what is... a timestamp.

>>684690821
lol yeah sure

>>684688496
Improve charisma to the max, give zero fucks, lay back and chill, let the girls talk and get interested in whatever they are but don't be a stalker, just pay attention. Get a stable job, learn to do something interesting, and read a lot about conversations topics. Also, dress nicely. And be clean. Put some Cologne, nothing too sweet. And keep it short with the compliments, we all like to be complimented for what we do, but don't be too clingy. And just go for it man. Don't expect to get a 10/10 girl, but you might end getting what it looks like a 5/10, then fall in love and realize she's a 10/10 for you, and you only.

>>684690624
Good, cuz don't listen to the haters, you're hot and I'd *pay* to get pounded by you.

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>>684690998

>>684690998
Hold a piece of paper with date and time on it next to yer tits

>>684688496
Wow.

>>684691061
Also, keep the chat positive. Focus on what you like, not what you don't.

>>684691212
>keep the chat positive
this is /b/, bro.

>>684688496
I looked like that when i was 18.
Now i'm 36, married the woman i was in a relationship with for 10 years 6 years ago and have 3 children.
Make of that what you wil.

>>684691337
Hes giving advice for the real world

>>684691377
Yes make of it as you wil

>>684688496
If they respect themselves then you've got no chance mate.

>>684688496
I'd have sex with you, but I'm neither self-respecting nor a woman.

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Here is another pic because I can.

>>684691935
It's something at least. How would you rate me by your standards on a scale of 1 to 10.

>>684690099
yeah, that you're slutting it up with your emoticons to prove a point. i'm a girl and no actual girl acts like you do

tee hee ^_^ girrrrrrrrl v_v riiiiiiiiiiiight :P

>>684692076
somehow you looks even worse in this one

>>684692076
I think you have a higher chance of getting laid than me, because I'm a 5'3" manlet.

>>684692301
tits and stamp or gtfo

>>684692301

Tits and stamp or gtfo

>>684692301
>>684692458
I second the motion.

>>684692076
you have nice tits...for a guy

>>684689421
>800 calorie deficit

do I need to do this if I'm not OP's size? I could lose 5 pounds or so but I'm not overweight.

>>684692076
Actually, you've got some nice tits anon

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>>684692388

>>684692582
Anything 500-1000 is good for anyone trying to lose weight

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>>684692076
If you get one into fatties, sure. That's a bit rare but don't give up. Just keep trying and make sure to build some confidence.

Sexuality is a bizzare thing dude.

>>684692076
Genuinely awful, don't you have a tumblr for these shitty posts
I mean look at those greasy hamboobs
and how omg your bladder actually edges over your tiny cock
This is like women in general, just came to a consensus, and numbered the things they found grossest about dudes
And then some wacky artist came up with this, like lmao wtf

>>684692668
Thank you

>>684692076
put on a bra and squeeze your tits together

>>684688496
yah dude, r u tall though

>>684692582
nah, 5 lbs is nothing. just work out and youll lose it in a week or so. u might want to look up the exerveises if u dont know them, they can fuck up ur back if u do them incorrectly.

>>684692852
Not really, at 5'11

>>684692076
those balls are huuuuge!!
so are your man boobs :(

>>684692835
All willing to take requests, but believe it or not I don't own a bra.

>>684689500
What did you use for the strap? A belt?

>>684688496
If your paying for it,
Sorry bro,, hit the gym, loose 20 kg and you'll look good,,
Or get a shitload of tattoos, join a bike gang,
>profit

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>>684692971
Cheers bro.

I think ill just cut out the shitty food and eat cleaner. that should do the trick.

thanks for the safety tip.

>>684693039
well you can easily date a fit cute girl no kidding, you need to work on your confidence and looks but youre fuckable

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>>684692233
You would probably break any scale

>>684692076
just run, lose weight. you can do good if you did

seriously, if you want a woman that you wont hate, just lose like 50 pounds and youll do fine. get a decent haircut. shop at eddie bauer, its perfect for a big guy like you

Lose weight, let that dick be free brother. It's trapped under all that fat friend, lose some weight.
It'll also get better/more blood when you get hard so it'll be bigger as well, and stay hard for longer.

you could probably find a nice AIDS-ridden gay nigger to put it in your ass OP

>>684693363
What if you're a fit 5'4" manlet? can you get a qt with confidence?

>>684693386
Hey, I'm only on my third industrial strength scale. I think this one is gonna make it a long time.

I would fuck, but I'm into chubby guys so

>>684692233
0.5

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This one is a little older, but the best ass shot I got.

>>684688496
Try penis extensions, be into cuck and/or swing and you are good to go. You can live happily ever after

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Highjacking this thread, am I good enough to get some succ?

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>>684693819
guh....

>>684693548
yep! aim for small girls though and dress well, work on your hair, shave and youll do fine, I've seen fatter manlet shitskins with ok girls

>>684688496
Look, I am a 23 year old virgin here
I was a kissless virgin until last month
You gotta hang with drunk chicks
I have probably 5kg less than you
Just hang in there

>>684693819
Haha. WTF are you doing naked in a walk-in?

>>684693996
his dick can get bigger if he loses weight

Most of the fat guys I know have smoking hot wives. Probably because keeping your disgusting wasteful lifestyle is so expensive. As long as you clear 50k a year and be the funny fat guy type, you should have no trouble with cumdumpsters....unless you're 5'6" or under, that might make it pretty difficult

>>684694010
you look like a shitskin faggot so maybe if youre into dicks

>>684694174
That is a long story, but the TL;DR version is my boss use to let me get naked at work.

>>684689407
Kekekekekek

>>684694174
that's where fat animals are stored

>>684689500
Where is your rist bruh

>>684693819
honestly I'd date you if you could make me laugh, im sick of asshole guys

>>684694276
WHAT THE FUCK HAHAHAHHAHAH

>>684694297
Kek'ed

>>684694276
wat? please elaborate via greentext

Ita proven that fat sorta presses down your dick so lose weight till your dick geta bigger, then swoon the bitches

Probably. I see bitchs with fat dudes all the time. Unfortunate because I don't want fat people to procreate and pass their shitty eating habits to their kids.

>>684694276
Near FOOD?!?!?

>>684694445
I've actually got it saved somewhere from a previous thread. Not greentext, but give me a second and I'll find it.

>>684694495
Washing dishes.

>>684694495
just the food that was about to spoil the following day, anything to avoid having to donate to shelters, besides; his boss knew for sure he would eat every god damn thing in there. Everybody wins.

>>684689421

This is a retarded routine:
>side bend = cuck-tier shit at the gym
>3 sets of 5 shrugs?? kys
>7 reps of sit-up jacknifes, how fat does a nigga have to be to not reach at least 10

Go to the gym, eat more vegetables than anything and actually think about what you put in your body. Aim to exercise at least 30 mins a day, this can be broken into smaller portions (ie 10min)

>>684688496

If the right girl gets to know you and likes your personality, sure, but from the get-go, judging only on your body, no. Post pick of face so we can gauge the situation better.

>>684694445
It was late one night and I was closing the store with Angela, a manager but just my age, and Pops. Pops’ name is really Jacob but we all call him Pops because he is one of the employee’s dads. Somehow that night, or should I say early morning, the topic went to nudity. The conversation was pretty extensive, but long story short, I wound up doing the dishes naked. Neither Pops nor Angela came back there. Pops was busy cleaning the front of the store and Angela had locked herself in the office, but every so often she would crack open the door and ask if I was still naked. I would reply “yes”, and she would do a girly scream, giggle, and close the door.
This story, as I knew it would, made its way around the store and soon several people were aware of what I had done. Some of them believed it but, with my reserved nature, others were reluctant. Then one morning I was working with Sonja (the manager), Chelsea, Nikki, Erika, Barb, and Linda. We are all about in the same age range, except Linda who is an older (but very young mentally) woman and Barb is in her early 30’s. At first I tried to pass the story off as a lie, but soon I started to see an opening to do it again. Doing something like this would really boost my image in the work place and I have an excuse to be naked. Sarcastically I started saying things to imply I was about to do it again, but eventually I went over to Nikki and Erika and asked them if I did this not to make fun of me. They gave me unexpected stares and asked if I was really gonna do it. I told them “maybe” and soon a lot of the store knew I what I was about to do.
I cleared it with Sonja and started heading back to the dishwasher and, as I took off my shirt, what I was doing really hit me. Soon I was naked and working on the dishes, but this time I was going to get some visitors.

>>684694895
They asked me if I was naked and I said “come back here and see”! Nobody came back but soon Erika said she needed to come back and get some guacamole and asked me to cover up. I figured since I was already naked it wouldn’t hurt to turn around if she really didn’t want to see me. I put my hand over my penis and turned my back. I did keep looking over my shoulder, however, just to keep an eye on her. She had gone so far as to find some cardboard and keep it over her face. She kept her face covered, but as she was leaving she looked around it and saw my naked butt (to which I owe my new nickname “Dimples”). Linda was very mature about it. Even just standing and talking with me like nothing was out of the ordinary. Next was Barb, and she got an unexpected eyeful. As she came walking back, I waved at her and she yelled “OH MY GOD” and started laughing. She went as far as to comment on my shaved pubic area, said I did a good job.
I got done with the dishes and got dressed, heading back over to drive-thru where Nikki was. Nikki and I are really close and she said she would have come to see me, but said if she knew her boyfriend saw a naked girl at work she would be upset. Erika, on the other hand, from what the others were saying was trying to get me to do it again. A lot of them think she wanted to see me, and won’t admit it. At shift change, Angela came in and was told the story. Angela, with a strange change of heart, asked me to “do the dishes” for her next time we work together. I have to say it was fun, but it would have to be with people I can trust, and at a safe time of day.

A few weeks later, on a Sunday morning, it was Josiah, Nikki, Erika, Tanya, and I. I didn’t initiate it this time though, Nikki did. I said that if Josiah didn’t want me to do it I wasn’t going to. After calling me a pussy a few times and practically begging Josiah to let me, he gave in.

>>684694895
LRN2greentext

>>684695070
However, I told Nikki that if I was going to do this, she had to be back there with me a little while (clothed of course). Reluctantly she agreed. Amazing how quickly people can have a change of heart once they have an obligation. I was washing the dishes and Erika told me to get something for her that would require me to be in view of the lobby, but she assured me that nobody but they were there. I went and got it, everybody was in the front of the store, and was seen naked by all four of them at once.

>>684695081
>too lazy
This was just a past conversation I had saved. might convert to greentext someday.

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>>684688496
No. It the gym. Squat, deadlift, OHP, bench press. Heavy. See the /r/fitness FAQ for details. Also use fitocracy.com. It has levels and points, plus instructions and videos to show you proper form (visible when you're logging your exercises, at least).

Follow my advice or accept pic related.

Hey op what's your email. I would really like to get in contact with you. I'm in a similar situation and would like to talk about it with you if you're interested.

>>684694186
But it's still average or smaller.

>>684689500
>no separation between hand and arm
Fucking yuck

>>684688977
this

>>684695349
That negates a bigger dick?
This is what i gather from you.h

Yes, because every is someone's fetish...the trick is finding them

>>684692076
I'm sorry to say it but it looks like your body is shity even if you lose 200 pounds. I mean, shit, them hips be wide. If you lose weight you gonna look like a bowling pin.

>>684695313
I'm tempted to make a new email address just to see how much I get coming in if I just post it here.

>>684689596
Fuck, big dudes always have awesome balls. /r/ pic from between your legs really showing them off.

>>684691377
But did you lose weight first?

>>684689421
>bicep curls

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>>684695770

>>684688496
(￣▽￣)

maybe Im not that self respecting girl... whatever
I would marry you. Youre super hot to me!

(((o(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)o)))

>>684696308
Thank you, honestly, on a scale of 1 to 10 where would you rate?

>>684696116
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHWHAHWHAT
fucking hell look at that teeny baby head trying to roll back into itself because it knows it will never please any woman ever

>>684696308
Bad bait

>>684696427
0.13

>>684696116
I want you to drag those all over my face. Can I get a low angle showing off some taint too? I'd lick all over your underside, and fuck I love to make out with a fat ass.

I suppose 'most people' like different things than me, but you're a solid 6.5/10 for me~ Could easily get higher with some fitness.

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>>684696427
so far 10/10
could you post hands?
(((o(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)o)))

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Last work pic I have

>>684694895
>>684695070
>>684695138
>boost my image in the workplace
Probably had the polar opposite effect mate.

>>684693819
nigga is your body melting

>>684697067
Sometimes I think so.

>>684696427
I don't care what a guy looks like, I've had my heart broken by the hottest guys, I just really want someone to make me laugh. Met a girl who likes you for you, be funny and confident.

>>684697007
Hands? Just hands?

The way you are now, you stand very little chance.

Here are 4 reasons why:

1) Your body is amusing to look at, but not at all in a sexy way

2) You probably don't even have the money to get a girl drunk

3) You are entirely aware of your shortcomings and so most women will be unforgiving in that regard

4) You obviously have low self-esteem or you wouldn't be asking /b/ for goddamn advice. low self-esteem is the least attractive thing of all time

Get a high-paying and respectable job and then find some physical activity that you are good at so you can increase your self-esteem. Only then will you even stand a chance.

And quit wasting your time asking /b/ for advice. This portion of 4chan is made up of high school children who have entirely warped perceptions of sociology. The average woman only wants the same thing you want - someone who is desired by others. If you can reach that level, then most likely you can have anyone you like.

>>684697283
yess!! Just hands over keyboard@!!!
xD
would be nice

>>684697357
>The average woman only wants the same thing you want - someone who is desired by others.

But I don't want anyone to desire my future gf but me

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>>684697407
I live to serve.

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>>684697717
Other hand

>>684697717
Oh my...
thanks!!
I feel super happy!
^w^

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>>684697717
>>684697978

>>684697579
I'm sad to say, but unless your future gf is attractive at all, then you are just going to have to deal with other people being attracted to her

That's what makes love such a complicated game - a single person is usually desired by many other people at the same time.

So quit being a baby and deal with it.

>>684698055
My pleasure. Willing to do more. Bored as can be.

>>684698157
fist up butt pls
^w^^w^

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>>684697579
then aim low anon and you'll win big

>>684698280
kek. I doubt I be able to get a pinky up there.

>>684698467
just try anon, just try

>>684697978
timestamped hands pls

>>684698280
kek

>>684696641
OP got hooked as well

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>>684698617

>>684698857
Like I said, I'm bored.

>>684688496
I look like you. Bigger bitch tits, and more hair. Plenty of cash though. Have a hot gf and buy whores on the reg too. I don't care what I look like. I do care to see beautiful girls licking my balls while they stroke my cock, see my big belly sitting on their ass when I fuck it. Perspective is where it's at.

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>>684697978
tell me
would you touch my saggy tits with your lovely hands?
><
Be honest.. its ok.

>>684698963
timestamp touching lip seductively

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>>684698467
Just take out your stash of pringles first.

>>684698857
Might even start a hand porn thread after this.

>>684688496
maybe with a landwhale

>>684699207
Touch, caress, kneed. I would treat them like tender treasures. I'd love to suck on one nipple and gently tweak the other.

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>>684698963
highjacking your thread, my hands are better than yours fag

>>684699583
Bro, we got us some sexy hands.

>>684699207
thats p saggy for what I assume is early/mid 20's?

>>684699024
Great fantasy there m8.

>>684699207
Literally, you're the worst kind of woman, perfect, but with a nipple piercing, damn it it's so frustrating getting home with a bitch like you and then having to find a way to throw her out before we even get to it.

>>684693525

maybe

>>684699207
Don't listen to >>684700365, the pierced one would be the one I would tweak.

>>684698963
>>684699302
OP, please? <3

>>684700855
I agree with this guy.
don't listen to the other guy who's actually had sex before

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>>684700365
well
if your not op.. your opinion means nothing to me.
(￣▽￣)

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>>684701152
holy shit my sides

>>684701161
Just curious, are you a former landwhale?

>>684692076
I like how he still shaves his pubes as if anyone is going to want to see him naked.

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>>684701161
He's not
>sexy lip

>>684701161
>not op
You're right there
I'd have to eat 3 sumo wrestlers to be on that kind of shit

>>684693819
Who the fuck took the picture???

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>>684701369

u mad?

>>684701705
Chelsea, from the stoy >>684694895

>>684701482
Thanks, cutie :3 <3

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>>684701771
why would I?

genuine curiosity?

>>684688496
It looks like a penis, only smaller.

>>684701882
It's what I do.

>>684701993
It's fun size

>>684702117
fun 'by yourself' size

>>684692076
You are legit a fuckng candy ass.
You know why your not gonna get laid?
Because it's obvious that you have never worked hard a day in your life.
You have created nothing.
How could a woman respect you, let alone want to fuck you; when you clearly don't really do anything other than masturbate.

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Getting bored, here is another pic.

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>>684702660
WHY AM I STILL IN THIS THREAD.

>>684702886
Why would you leave?

>>684693236
fucking sides man shit made me kek hard

>>684702660
that's fucking sad, you're pushing it in at the waist in that much and you're still pathetic, god can be cruel I guess, shit.

my god thanks for this thread OP
we all go through good and bad
but I'll never be as undesirable as you

>>684689500
Chekd and nice bait

>>684702984
this is my answer as well op >>684703127

doing gods work anon

Yeah, you could. She probably wont be an attractive woman, but you could definitely find a girl who'd love you.

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>>684703127
Yep, not much but it's mine

>>684703127
I'm at a healthy weight, have an average face, have no mental issues, and social skills are alright. I am not disabled in any way. Yet, I guarantee you that I am 100% more undesirable than OP. Wanna guess why?

>>684688496
jesus fuck op, save money and get a surgery, else your life will continue to be a misery

>>684703683
you're black?