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>>684627437
I suppose n-no one needs me today. Oh well.

How can I get her to like me?

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>>684627957
Who is she? Tell me more, little Anon.

>>684627437
How do I get over a girl who I think is my true love and I will never find anyone like her again?

>>684627437
Shouldn't we be calling you Andy instead of Alice?

Be true in your answer.

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>>684628102
No, my name is Alice.

>>684628069
First, you need to stop being delusional; the concept of "true love" is not that old, and clearly doesn't fit with how humans interact.

Second, what do you mean you'll never find anyone like her again? What was unique to her?

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Can you explain binary space partitioning like I'm 8 and a half.

>>684627957
Is she aware of your existance? And have you talked with her.

>>684627437
You're not Alice from Alice in Wonderland you're just some worker for a computer company.

It hurts to live, but people get angry with me when I try to die. What do, doc?

>>684627437
How do I get better at trusting people? I've got a great girl, and a great opportunity ahead, but I keep holding back because I can't let myself trust anyone.. I've never been able to, really

I have general anxiety disorder. Should I do CBT or just request medication? I can't keep on living like this.

>>684628232
she was the first girl to say "I Love You" to me. She was the first girl I felt comfortable about being naked in front of. She is the first girl that found me attractive and wanted to date me. She is the first girl that actually found me funny and didn't care about my past.

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>>684628250
BSP? 8.5? Hm.

It's where we divide stuff in the world up into groups based on what can see what until everything is as small as it can be.

>>684628304
I'm Alice from Touhou.

>>684628385
Why does it hurt to live?

>>684628399
Why do you think you have trust issues? Has someone hurt you in the past?

multiple people have asked me if I have bi-polar disorder and I frequently contemplate suicide, where do I go to get checked? Just the normal doctor?

>>684628519
No you're just some Rper acting as Alice from Touhou. Nice try.

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>>684628501
Both. Unlike WWII, a war on two fronts is a good thing here.

>>684628515
So the only thing unique about her is she was the first? Go out and find the "first who did it better than the first" then.

>>684628631
Yes. Go to your PCP or GP, talk to them, ask for a referral to a psych.

>>684628650
You see a whole lot of roleplay here, buddy?

>>684628054
Well I don't want to be too specific.
Someone (not me) posted her snap on this site so shes probably looks at this site now and then.

I don't really go on 4chan that much. Just when I'm high.

Either way, lets call this girl J
She wass in one of my classes and she actually came over one time so we could work on project. We spent most of the time smoking the herbal Jew. Our project sucked

The next day she barely talked to me. The day after that nothing. and so on


You could even see it by the way she texted that she lost interest. Her texts were, at first, long and fast, but then became smaller and smaller. I stopped texting her.

I don't know what I did wrong. Hopefully I'll see her again next semister

I think its because she just broke up with her BF of like 6 years or something. idk fam

>>684628731
Oh now you're tough taking me, nice try anon. Also hope you get better rper Alice.

>>684628731
(Anxietyfag here)
Thanks, I suppose first step is to talk to my doctor who can redirect me to a psychologist?
I hope you feel better soon, OP :3

>>684628731
>>>684628515 (You)
>So the only thing unique about her is she was the first? Go out and find the "first who did it better than the first" then
is that really all it takes?
I am 25, so I feel too old and inexperienced to date again and the fact that she wasn't white makes me think all white women aren't attractive.

>>684628519
I've been hurt in the past, yes, but no worse than any other "pretty bad" break ups I guess. I feel bad for not being able to trust anyone because I really have no reason to be like this. I don't know what's wrong with me. In scared it's going to ruin what I have going for be right now.

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>>684627437
Hello alice I hope you feel better and me and my girlfriend are doing great we had an amazing date on a boat and we are both getting more intimate with eachother each week and talking about seeing each other more since we only see each other once a week due she works in mornings and I work at night.

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>>684628731
It's not easy for everyone to find a person like that.

>>684627437
I am a paedophile,21 years old live with mom i rly want a loli dakimakura,but i think my mom will discover my love for little girls should i buy ?

>>684629029
Not OP, but congrats anon

>>684629147
You should buy a Mossberg and kill yourself

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>>684628923
Thanks <4

>>684628930
Correct. Talk to your PCP or GP as soon as possible!

>>684628909
Yes, sounds like a breaking up could definitely cause someone to act like she is currently acting. Give her some space and time Anonymous.

>>684628980
In my experience, it's all it takes.

Also, 25? Jesus christ dude, you aren't dead! What will you do when you are old, gray, and 30?!

Get back into the scene!

>>684629128
And? Nothing worth doing is easy.

>>684628985
You need to seek a therapist then; it sounds like you have some unresolved issues, and unfortunately I'm not trained for this sort of thing.

A therapist referral can come from your PCP or GP, so start there.

>>684629029
I'm happy to hear that <4

>>684629147
No.

I have a severe addiction to heroin. I've tried everything I can think of, multiple stints in outpatient, one inpatient that lasted seven months, on probation and if I come up dirty again I'm going to prison, have a wife good family things are starting to look up for me but even as I type this I can't get the thought of how good the rush is gonna be when I get home in a couple hours. I just can't stop. I tried for months was clean but moved back to my area and can't seem to quit. It feels like the only time I genuinely enjoy life and everything and everyone in it is when I'm high and I need help. I've taken all the suggestions they give you in treatment and it still doesn't seem to make a shitbit of a difference.

>>684628731
>You see a whole lot of roleplay here, buddy?
[different anon]
I think your roleplaying as a psychologist.
I also think you were born a male.

why do i always get really anxious when people come talk to me.

>>684627437
I have this rash on the bottom of my nutsack. Is it a sign of bipolar disorder?

>>684629507
No rper Alice is a girl, literally.

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>>684629492
What medications did you take for it?

>>684629507
Okay. Why do you think such things?

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>>684629297
Just saying it's easier said than done, so...

And being inexperienced at 30, you might as well be dead.

>>684629297
>Yes, sounds like a breaking up could definitely cause someone to act like she is currently acting. Give her some space and time Anonymous.

Thats what I think too. I think she likes me, but doesn't want anything serious. She doesn't seem like the type of girl to be ok with just FWBs

I guess that explains why she came over and gave me a big hug and whatever and even texted me "thanks for having me over" and then never speaks to me again.

>>684629297
thanks OP. take lots of zinc and protein for your cold. also get some codeine cough syrup.that shit is amazing for colds

>>684629492
sorry fam. I know a bunch of people who can't stop shooting. I got in huge trouble back in high school for fucking around with percocets

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>>684629576
No.

>>684629540
Hm. That's not something I can explain unless you elaborate on it. Please give me more information.

>>684629751
I've got some robotussin; codeine does nothing for me, given I am a pain patient.

>>684629684
Yep. That's what it looks like.

>>684629682
Says the loneliest Satori to ever walk the earth?

30 ain't the end of the road; it's just the beginning.

>>684629147
>>684629297
What i can do to stop being horny for little girls,like therapi or some drug,maybe jerk off more times ?

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>>684629866
Don't abuse opiates; you are the reason pain patients like me can't even get oxy anymore.

>>684627437
I'm almost 50 years old and have lived my whole life with untreatable clinical depression. I'm also anhedonic and asexual; I've never experienced fun. I don't even known what "fun" means. People get drunk or they go on carnival rides or they have sex or drive around in cars and claim that it's "fun." I guess I have to believe them, but I have no idea what it really means.

I feel completely alienated from the rest of my species. I have no friends, and my family basically disowned me. My parents threw me out on the street as soon as they were legally allowed and told me they didn't like me and didn't want to associate with me.

I live with no fridge, no stove, and no shower; I have to take sponge baths in the sink. A lifetime of alienation has left me destitute, and a lifetime of destitution has left me with shattered health. I've been diabetic for 25 years and have chronic pain in my hands and feet from peripheral neuropathy and Reynaud's sign. I'm also going slowly blind from a rare form of glaucoma called pigmentary dispersion syndrome, completely unrelated to the diabetes.

I recently completed a "quality of life" test someone posted to /b/ and I got a result of 1.8 out of 10. The lowest in the entire thread. Think about that. My quality of life is lower than every single person in /b/.

My question to you is, after all this time, is there anything I can actually do to change any of this, or do I just wait patiently for poor health to close the cover on an unpleasant life?

>>684629867
well... when ever someone calls my name, or wants to talk to me etc, i feel like ive done something wrong. so at this point i almost feel like running away rather than talking to other humans... very confusing but... well.

how do i stop wanting to rape people?

a lot of nights i come home and look around at my shrines and collections and plans and am taken aback, but sooner or later i go rigth back to it.

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>>684629910
Get a better taste for porn.

>>684629867
Road of wizardry and being a hermit.

>>684627437
I am currently in a tough situation. I am in love with a girl. She loves me too. But that's not all.

I live in Australia and she lives in America. We're both lesbians with relatively homophobic parents with no money to fly to each other.

What do?

How do i talk to a girl without coming off as cringey?

How can I not feel like I want to kill myself

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>>684629910
Yes, go to a therapist. That's probably your best bet.

>>684629999
Jesus. What a terribly awful case of intractable depression, mixed with quads so you know it is real.

I'm not an M.D., but I am a pain patient; there are things you can do. Have you stayed on top of your diabetes? Are you obese? Do you have a daily routine? What antidepressants are you on?

>>684630084
Nothing wrong with that.

>>684630009
That's anxiety alright! Seek medical attention! CBT can fix that no problem.

>>684630087
Well, is marriage on the table? Also how old are you both?

>>684630349
Find ways to make yourself, happy anon.

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>>684630328
Use your words; just try not to stumble over them and try not to be too "cool"

>>684630349
Go to your GP or PCP! Depression is a medical disorder; go get treatment!

>>684630438
If he could do that, he wouldn't be depressed, Anonymous.

>>684630365
how am i supposed to.. WHO am i supposed to talk to. to get help? i only see people when im at work. i dont know where ''medical services'' are

>>684630365
Let's just say neither of us are legal yet.
We definitely do want to get married though.

>>684630438
See like I've tried finding hobbies like reading, vidya, hiking, etc. but it never clicks, it never feel satisfied in anything I do

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>>684630611
Your doctor. Do you not have one? Now is a great time to get one!

>>684630646
Then there's nothing anyone can do; you have to wait it out.

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>>684630365
There is if lonelyness is killing you inside.

>>684628515
YOLO

>>684630438
See like I've tried finding hobbies like reading, vidya, hiking, etc. but it never clicks, it never feel satisfied in anything I do. I haven't felt lastingly happy for years

>>684630594
Was just trying to help
>>684630684
Well then, anon. I guess you should get your advice from Alice right now sense I'm not entirely trained to deal with suicidal anons.

>>684630438
See like I've tried finding hobbies like reading, vidya, hiking, etc. but it never clicks, it never feel satisfied in anything I do. I haven't felt lastingly happy for years.

>>684630438
See like I've tried finding hobbies like reading, vidya, hiking, etc. but it never clicks, it never feel satisfied in anything I do. I haven't felt lastingly happy for years man

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>>684630819
One can always come back from the hermit style; you, of all people, should know the depths to which the heart will go to seek others, Satori.

>>684630881
That is anhedonia; seek medical attention post haste. It is treatable.

>>684630890
I know. *hugs tightly* I know. I'm not chastising you. Just trying to help you understand.

>>684631052
>>684630953
>>684630881
God damn copypastas

>>684630719
Waiting it out is going to be hard, I'd be killed if my parents found out. Do you at least have any tips?

>>684629651
>Okay. Why do you think such things?
Because there have been threads here and elsewhere discussing it.
Prove them wrong.
Timestamp your degrees so we can see your real name and pussy.

>>684627437
I have trouble maintaining eye contact (especially with girls). It is really bad. Wat do?

>>684631080
Treatable how?

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>>684627437
is liking totally passable tgirls like this gay?

>>684630719

i dont got doctor. never been seriously sick or ... anything before. how am i supposed to get one?
cant i just get over this without one

>>684630365
>Have you stayed on top of your diabetes? Are you obese? Do you have a daily routine? What antidepressants are you on?

My weight fluctuates by up to 150 pounds depending on where I am in my depressive cycle. I've gained and lost weight so often that I look like a half-melted candle. No, my diabetes is not well-controlled. I'm so off-putting that doctors don't enjoy being around me, so I receive sub-standard care. A few years ago I had an abscess on my perineum which grew so large so quickly that it had to be lanced in emergency at the hospital. They sent me home without antibiotics and by the next day my balls had swollen to the size of cantaloupes. I spent the next week in hospital getting antibiotics pumped into my arm. They said I came without hours of Fournier's Gangrene -- flesh-eating bacteria of the crotch, with a survival rate of less than 30% in diabetics. All because the doctor couldn't wait to be rid of me and sent me home without antibiotics.

I'm one of 20% of people with depression considered hard-to-treat. I tried medication, I tried every kind of treatment from Freudian psychoanalysis to Ellis' Rational Emotive Therapy. None of it works. Clearly. I'm not stupid. I was a child prodigy with an IQ rated at four sigmas. At this point I've more or less consigned myself to living out my remaining time in misery. I don't expect you to be able to fix what no one else can; I guess I'm just wondering if you've any suggestions I might not already have tried, or if you've seen anyone capable of getting out from under anything worse than this.

>>684631080
Thanks Alice you're always there for me on /b/ when i need help. Thank you.

>>684631080
Why can't people hangout with me? I dont get it i always share what i'm given and i always care for those near me. But whenever i ask my "friends" to hang out idk get pizza (which i offer to pay for) and play vidya we grew up with they all decline.

>>684630365
>>684629910
i think i have social anxiety, i talked to my mom about going to a psychologist, maybe i can talk to she about this anyway thanks

>>684631146
No sorry about that I'm posting for mobile and not used to the shitty captcha that kept saying I failed it

>>684631250
This is a trans? Prove it

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>>684631080
I also know that people don't have the time or will to deal with inexperienced people at that age.

>>684627437
have you ever heard of a cuddly sociopath
my friend dubbed me thusly

seems i need people around me,but dislike most of them

>>684631371
I feel the same as you

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>>684631147
You are underage; my hands are quite tied!
But when I was underage, well, I used skype a lot with my significant other.

It helps close the distance.

>>684631200
There have been threads here and elsewhere defending my gender as well. I even did cosplay threads for quite a while, and will do more soon.

I don't know, I don't get the mentality.

>>684631250
Depends what you mean by gay.

>>684631219
With CBT and therapy and medication.

>>684631201
I would recommend seeking out a psych who can help you with immersion or exposure therapy; it's highly effective for such things.

>>684631265
Well, have you gotten over it so far? If not, why do you think it would work better with more time?

>>684631340
Its my honor.

>>684631371
Have you tried asking them why they seem so adverse to it? Maybe a reasonable explanation exists.

>>684631469
I disagree.

>>684631489
That sounds more like edge than sociopathy.

Not sure if existential crisis or overwhelming drug-fueled self-hatred?

>>684631489
Not OP but someone once called me "cruel with a boyish twist"

I think im a psychopath, enjoy being around people but I dont like most of them either.

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>>684631324
Which medications? I do have a few suggestions, though they are not necessarily white market legal. Perhaps email me at [email protected] ?

It sounds like you absolutely need to start being your own advocate, and demanding you get respect and treatment from doctors Anonymous! You are worth more than this!

>>684631594
Damn man life aint fair.

>>684631609
I actually have but all i ever get are excuses. I don't get it tho man i get along fine with like 10% of my friends and many strangers but like all my other friends from highschool that dont have an actual life dont wanna hang out

>>684627437
Are you female?

>>684627437
why is it i beat my dick religiously but when a decent looking girl gives me the time of day in real life instead of musterin up the balls, i always feel adamant and empty on the inside

>>684631609
i dont know i dont want to meet new people thought of that makes me feel like imploding!
what am i gonna do...

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>>684631439
daniel ferreira niel

>>684627437
psychology is bullshit. it's a fucking meme that went too far. they are literally useless money sappers.

>>684627437
How do I stop betrayal from being a fantasy? I've pretty much self-diagnosed that it arose as a way to fetishize that pain so it could no longer hurt me. I never used to feel this way. Normally the jealous type. I see it as wrong, but I'm still uncontrollably turned on by cuckolding.

>>684631609
Alright. I guess it was still worth asking. Thank you anon!

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>>684631710
I would recommend stopping the drugs in any case.

>>684631874
Yes.

>>684631858
What kind of excuses?

>>684631933
Because you are addicted to porn and it gave you unrealistic understandings of what sexual gratification looks like.

Turns out getting a girl is harder than typing in a URL; who knew?

>>684632023
>>684632023
Seek medical attention.

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>>684631609
They certainly do end up being judged and are thought of as weird.

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>>684632061
Okay. Odd that we're STEM then.

>>684632097
My pleasure. I'm Alice by the way.

>>684632124
Aren't we all?

>>684632112
i will just give up.

>>684632266
Nice to meet you Alice! I'm Rhiannon. I'll probably ask for some more advice in the future since I'm such a fucking mess, if you don't mind. Thanks again.

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>>684627437
Psychologist = watched Frasier

>>684631250
684631609
>Depends what you mean by gay.
Homosexual. Liking men.
I love women and always have, but find a tgirl like this very hot and sexy. Never been interested or attracted to a man in any way ever.

>>684627437
i take sertraline since a month or so. It works quite well after I increased the dose from 50 to 100mg. Only problem is I feel tired constantly and I still have absolutely no strength to get up and do anything by myself. Im pretty much a completely passive existence atm. I dont feel bad, I dont feel good, I just exist and I cant do anything ( I go out with my buddys from time to time - 1-2times a week, but other than that I just sleep and think and do nothing) I want to gather some strength again to do anything important (finally get my bachelors degree) and finally enjoy my life again, but Im not in the position to do that atm. Is it just a matter of time if I keep reflecting as objective as possible or do I need therapy?

How old are you and where do you live?

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>>684632266
There's being quirky weird and "there's probably something wrong with them, stay away from them" weird.

>>684627437
Hey, i have the flu too! Fuck it, right?

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>>684632610
Oh god it's kicking my ass you have no idea

>>684632511
Nice to meet you <4 Feel free

>>684632531
...were you prescribed this medication?

>>684627437
Psychologist always needs to stutter her nigger-ass mouth around

>>684628515

Find a second girl to do those things.

>>684631842
I tried Zoloft and Cipralex. Zoloft left me feeling as if I'd just been hit in the face with a shovel, 24/7. It also screwed up my dreams and left me feeling exhausted in the mornings. Cipralex had few side effects, but also didn't much help. On balance I decided it wasn't worth long-term liver damage for the marginal benefits.

My suspicion is that my brain biology doesn't work the same way other people's does. For example, getting drunk does nothing to or for me. I can drink until I fall unconscious and my behaviour doesn't change at all. People can't even tell I'm drunk. I had the same family doctor for more than 40 years, and he tried to convince me to try pot, but my feeling is that if I have to be miserable -- and it does appear that I have to be -- then I'd rather be miserable and clear-headed than stoned.

The irony of you telling me to self-advocate is that I've actually done advocacy work for the last 25 years. I'd never allow anyone else to be treated the way I am, but I've always been aware that there's something fundamentally wrong with me on a very basic level. Parents are programmed genetically to love their children; when parents reject a child with revulsion, there's a very clear problem, and it's not with the parents.

Anyway, thanks for trying to help. I figure I am required to perform due dilligence in at least trying to help myself to avoid being accused of slow-motion suicide. Not killing myself is probably the only claim I still have to any kind of moral high ground.

>>684632511
>I'm such a fucking mess
Yeah, I'll bet, bucko. There's that whole esoteric song on how you just can't win.

Thomas James likes cock.

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>>684627437
*Fuck, i'm late again, how are by the way, i've had problems lately finding your threads.*

>>684632061
>psychology is bullshit. it's a fucking meme that went too far. they are literally useless money sappers.
I really don't understand their purpose either.
They can't prescribe meds so you need a psychiatrist and you could see a therapist if you need to talk it out.
So besides grabbing $$$ WTF do they do?

>>684632525
>>684631250
>>684631609
fixed...
>Depends what you mean by gay.
Homosexual. Liking men.
I love women and always have, but find a tgirl like this very hot and sexy. Never been interested or attracted to a man in any way ever

>>684631777
yeah thats the thing I feel gratified when manipulating people,and i am good at it

fit in well couse that so not a pariah

btw imm 31 so no teen angst

Everyone hates me, what to do?

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>>684632835
...wait, you took TWO SSRI's and now you think all antidepressant medication doesn't work for you?

There are other classes of antidepressant you know; SNRI's, triple reuptake inhibitors, tetracyclics, tricyclics, MAOIs, all sorts of shit.

Have you tried any of those classes of drugs?

>>684632922
I've been sick, so no threads.

>>684632933
We aid doctors, psychiatrists, and therapists; we're the glue. We also do research that they don't do.

So, yeah. Not useless any more than nurses are.

>>684633123
*hugs tight* I don't hate you.

Fucking fag

>>684627437
My life is dominated by first world problems.

My high paying job is sucking the life out of me and I know it's a matter of time before the idiots at the top are replaced by bigger idiots following a round of layoffs to appease stock holders.

My wife is borderline personality and bi polar. If I say anything she interrupts then later says I never talk. She never listens to me. She refuses to get therapy.

My cats, which I used to be able to find quiet solace with getting needier and one is occasionally pissing on our couch.

My neighbor turned his house into a rental and so far we've had
-a family of Jamaicans complete with chickens, part-time DJ and counterfeit purse operation they hid inside their "vehicle repair business" in front of the house
-two DEA raids
-a nice white couple that were actually military PTSD survivors = 2/3 spent yelling at each other

I feel there is nothing realistic to do but quit job, quit marriage and reinvent myself in another country.

Thoughts?

>>684627437
What drove you to start creating these threads and attempt to help people on /b/?

Is this some form for second rate experience you're trying to earn for yourself via helping online?

Are you from US?

And a question more for your expertise; How come I have difficulties in finding an individual with whom I would like to be friends with. I suppose you could say I am judgmental and picky about the people I associate with but it makes me pretty lonely when my standards are a bit high. Is this just something I'll have to deal with or "attempt" to lower those standards and live with annoyance?

I'm not desperate for this tho, just trying to figure myself out.

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>>684627437
>>684632922
*Excuse me again, i meant to write "How are you" but it seems like i've forgotten to add that last part.*

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>>684633384
I am from the US, I've been doing this for five years, nothing drove me to do it.

You probably are judging others more harshly than you are judging yourself; be mindful of why you are judging people, and be more self aware.

>>684633410
Sick with the flu.

>>684633286
Germany

>>684627437
Okay so I've been under some stress lately and I'm sure you know the whole "things get warped just before sleepy time." shit. For some reason I've been rationalizing that feeling as a literal thing. Like coming home from work and thinking he's in there waiting. I'll do the dishes tonight so he waits a little longer. Might go for a walk. I don't think there's actually some rando spirit that makes me over think actually waiting for me to go to bed but it seems to help. Am I insane?

How old are you? Where do you live, op?

>>684633556
But what if I am aware and people never cease to disappoint me?

I HAVE a problem. why the fuck does everyone think im an idiot and hates me. my other eye is blind and i have NO depth perception at all and i bump into walls and shit. how do i WELL YKNOW i want to be treated like a normal person not like an idiot. i need something to .. well. I NEED HELP.

>>684632901
I know my problems aren't as big as some other anon's and I'm probably not as mentally fucked as you guys but we're all still huge messes. If we weren't we wouldn't be on 4chan ffs

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Alright guys, the antihistamine is kicking my ass enough that I'm going to pass out on my keyboard.

If I'm better, I'll be back tomorrow at 8AM.
If not, uhh, send me an email if you need me: [email protected]

As always, with all the love in the world,
Alice

P.S. ur willy is rubbish

>>684627437
Quick question for you. I have who everyone agrees is the best girlfriend ever, we have loads in common...and I'm talking real things like we both game and like the same movies, music, and shit, she treats me very well, cares about me, cooks me dinner, and washes my dirty underwear. But, I can't help but wonder whether there's another, better chick out there for me. After a few months, I'm bored with her and I want to break up with her. It's not because there's anything wrong with her, I just feel like I need to end the relationship before something fucks everything up. I figure if I end it before she finds a reason to, I won't get hurt because I've had fucked up relationships before. Anyway, my question is, will I ever feel comfortable with being in a relationship, or due to my past, will I always end up disappointing women by not committing? I thought it would bother me at first, but I don't really feel anything. I feel bad for them mostly. Is that normal, or am I a sociopath or some shit? I wasn't always like this.

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>>684627437
Hey, i feel like im slowly losing all my feelings as if they are numb. Like love for my gf(but i do love her without a doubt) and fun and such. Its scaring me. It also sometimes feel like im dim in the head and sort of in a dream but also not. Its weird and hard to explain.

How can i fix this by myself?

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>>684633178
*Oh ok, so it wasn't me failing spectacularly to find those threads.
I'd like to ask you today about that video that you posted recently, why did you posted said video?*

>>684633178
>SSRI's
I've done a lot of reading on antidepressant medication (psychology and neurobiology are something of a hobby of mine), and there's a growing body of evidence that what we think anti-depressants are doing actually has nothing to do with why they have an effect; that changes in serotonin levels are an effect and not the cause, for example. We're doing the psychopharmacological equivalent of drilling holes in the skull to let the evil spirits out, completely ignorant of what we're doing and why it might, in some cases, have a positive effect.

And no, I haven't tried any other classes of antidepressant. My experience with SSRIs has convinced me that I'm better off suffering my evil the natural way. These drugs work by mimicking chemicals which are already present in the brain; in theory, there's no reason we can't take control of our own chemical factories through bio-feedback and, indeed, I've spent many years meditating and learning how to access my own autonomic processes. I'm guessing it's why I'm still alive despite having a quality of life most people would consider horrific.

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>>684627437
I was recently diagnosed with BPD. And it came at a time that I was very accepting of this diagnosis, and actually accept it.

Being aware of my disorder actually changes the way I see everything and makes me question my own feelings.

What are some more diffusion tactics i can try besides sensory self soothing? I have a few I've discovered, but they only work while I'm doing the act. As soon as I stop, I'm back in the hole again.

Also what is some good reading material for a MALE with BPD. As many of the material is based around women roles and the woman perspective.

>>684627437
My gf is on Welbutrin for mild depression and 25 mg Lamictal twice daily for bi-polar tendencies. Not as bad as it used to be, but still existent, she has a problem (not sure if even related to being bi-polar) of remembering only one negative thing out of a mountain of positive things. For example, she could have the most phenomenal weekend, firnds, work, relationship going wonderfully, go off on a nice weekend holiday & have a romantic/happy time and three days later can write the entire thing off as bad because she happens ot remember not getting the exact response she wanted to some question or other. Are there any ways to correct this habit completely or at least replace it with a habit that allows her to remember a more accurate version of things (i.e. not such a negative view)?

>>684632835
What happened with you and your parents anon?

>>684627437
Are you accredited?

>>684634170
yeah thats not even close to true and meditation does literally nothing for depression so gg go see a doctor

>>684627437
What you think if you made something stupid, acted stupid..

Well its over, should you being it up like, "lol sorry for being án idiot etc, lol i was so stupid" or just carry on, and dont ask ppl around , like "you DONT think im stupid right?"

>>684627437
Why is that some people like to yell out loud that they have medical depression on social media? I mean... I have medical depression and am taking meds... But I'm not going around telling everyone about it. Personally I think it makes me look weak.

>>684627437
Hey there. even if youre not a psychologist, thanks for taking your time.

im not getting shit done, got Finals soon and cant get myself to do stuff. also im feeling lonely, am sad all the time and also just don't know what i should do with my life or why i shouldn't consider suicide, seeing how little i can change something.

>>684632772
yes ofc... I take it for the first time though... I know I have a repeating form of depression since my early teens. Didnt take anything against that till now(10years after). I needed that, because I didnt have such a down since 8years ago and felt really bad and suicidal. Its not like that anymore though, but like I said Its impossible to do anything productive atm. Even things that are supposed to make me feel better like going to/speaking with my parents, spending time with friends etc. are just a burden atm. I feel like someone or something is draining my energy constantly and dont know what to do against it. Im not stupid, I think I have a pretty good knowledge of human nature, and I am definitely not far fetched from reality or something. Maybe the biggest problem is that I am a bit too obsessed with reality and truth to be able to cope with it, considering that I am very emotional and a bit labile from time to time. I didnt experience anything quite like that now though... I mean I had times like that before, but I just feel so exhausted. I feel like my body and mind kinda take control over my actions and keep me in a kind of resting position I cant get out of, if you know what I mean...

>>684633860
Just trying to use a light-hearted Fleetwood Mac reference for your name. I'm sorry if it seemed like I was down-playing your issues

>>684634247
My parents were very young when they got married; my father was 19, my mother 18. One day they were living with their parents, the next they were living together, married. My mother was pregnant with me three months later (they were Catholics and I was a rhythm baby). They were never prepared to be parents and certainly couldn't deal with me.

My father was physically abusive, my mother was sexually abusive, and I started having psychotic breaks when I was 12. The school wouldn't allow me back until my parents proved that I was receiving therapy. One of the first things the therapist -- a Freudian psychoanalyst -- told me was that my parents were crazy (her word), and that I should listen to her, not them. She saved my sanity, but created such hostility in the home that my parents threw me out into the street when I turned 16 and they were legally allowed to do so.

When I was in my early 20s, they admitted to me that they didn't like me, had never really liked me, and that the only reason they associated with me at all is because they were my parents. I often go 5+ years without seeing them.

Am I depressed? How do I know? I felt like this since I remember myself. Been rough through elementary socially because of idiotic kids getting in fights with me. I am pretty distant from people, I'm cold and I feel like my mind is cluttered and I can't think clearly. I was sure for a long time I must be sociopathic because of how I feel and act around people (I literally had the social skills of a 5 year old, after kindergarten, at the beginning of middle school)...

It got to a point where I figured it's better for myself to act like I'm OK and I basically made a second persona, a happy ubpeat super open and open minded kid. I feel confused at times because it gets to the point where I'm like yeah I'll do this or that and the realisation that I don't really want to do it comes up...

Actually I could go for days about my personality but I'm not even sure what's part is me and what is the guy I've made myself become.

My life has been a confusing mess for a long time, and lately I've been overeating and having anxiety attacks (I don't know how long I've had them, I just very recently realised what that feeling actually was).

I'm in the army so going to the psych guy for help might seem like I'm trying to lie my way out of the army...

So am I depressed? because it's the only way to explain how I've felt for a long long time.

>>684628069
How can i ger over the tge pain of being so far apart in a long distance relationship?

>>684628985
Whatever your trauma may be with this issue, the hardest part is going to be accepting that it happened and not letting it consume your by reliving it with memories. You will probably never forget what happened but what you can do this moment forward is take what has happened and rather than let it define you and put it behind you. Remember that trauma doesn't really ever heal or show for that matter, If you don't look straight ahead and see what life really is- you are just as good as dead.

no anon here will give you that sense of validity. Take what has happened, take whats good from it (as IMPOSSIBLE as this seems) and let it become your armor against life. Wear it when you feel its necessary, but don't be afraid to open your visor to people.

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How does it feel to "study" in some pseudo-science that is largely based on anecdotal research with little scientific backing to become a glorified therapist?

>>684627437
i want my boyfriend to abuse me. I know what all his buttons are, and i love pushing them. He just hit me for the first time, and it was wonderful, everything i wanted and more. but he seems devastated. he was never like this before me.
i want to be abused... but not if it makes him feel bad. what do?

how do i overcome bipolar?

>>684634196
start hrt. bdp boys seem to like estrogen.

>>684627437
Why is my bipolar so unpredictable anon?

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>Rule 16

>>684635095
> mother was sexually abusive

what happened? Also im sorry about this but it sounds like you just had fucked up parents. It wasnt your fault they chose to act like. Maybe theyll give a deathbed apology.

How do I get my mind to reflect my body? My body looks like this:

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I am a mildy successful man who browses 4chan for fun. I even own my home. WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME!

>>684635349
Not op but I would recommend trying to add bdsm to your bedroom life and explaining to him exactly what you want. If he doesn't want to hurt you that's a good thing but there are ways to get your jollies and not push him in that sense

>>684627437
I only seem to be able to enjoy myself when I'm with other people, that's the only time I feel truly happy.
I am one of those people who always tries to just laugh at everything and so I don't really take anything seriously. I feel like a lot of the time my laughs are at the expense of the people I'm with and I don't want to drive them away.

So I guess my question is am I a bad person? Should I try change?

>>684627437
Is having no money a cause a severe depression and then leads to suicide?

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here come the reinforcements. psychologist specialist in the interpretation of dreams reporting in.
Tell me your weirdest and recurring dreams and i will try to help you understand them or even to understand yourself

>>684631324
Would you share ur email? I would email you and stay in contact. I studied clinical psychology aswell. Take care

>>684635484
Yeah, not going to happen.
If it did, I would be a very handsome woman.

Sex is definitely one of my many coping mechanisms. And I'm not saying I haven't had sex with both men and woman. But much prefer being with a woman.

Not to mention the root cause seems to be my mother dying when young.


Is it surprising that my current long term girlfriend is a 44 year old nympho milf?

>>684627437
Idk if its a question for you, but do you think everyone on earth goes through depression at some point in their life or is it possible for anyone to go through life happy 90% of the time? I know everyone experiences sadness, I'm talking more along the lines of actual depression.

>>684636134
I dream that I'm on 4chan, and I can't ever get off.

>>684627437
Hello anon, I am bipolar and when I cycle I essentially lose my memory of most things during my manic and depression stages... it ruins my life. It causes me to lose jobs, to forget even simple tasks and stresses my marriage due to my cycling being so unpredictable. It could occur today, in 5 minutes or in 3 weeks. I'll go from a motivated and self-sustaining alpha to a borderline suicidal beta. What do op? I take meds and such to help

>>684635697
I have memories starting at about the age of five or six months, which is another thing I discovered makes me freakish. From a very young age, my mother used to give me hand-jobs in the bath tub. She said it was a game called "got your dickybird." One day she left me in the tub with my little brother while she went to answer the phone and returned to find me playing "got your dickybird" with him. She screamed at me that I was a horrible, evil person. I was terrified because I didn't know what I'd done, but when I asked her all she would do is glare at me and say, "YOU KNOW." I was never again allowed to take a bath with my brother again.

She was always finding reasons to touch me; she'd rub me head to toe in lotions and linaments, for example, whenever I got sick or had a sunburn. She used to love pushing her breasts into my face whenever she could find an excuse, like cutting my hair, and was always doing things like putting on a shear top and asking if I could see her nipples.

One day when I was 13 or so, I came in from mowing the lawn on a hot day covered in sweat, with my top off. For the first time she outright propositioned me. She came down and sat beside me, and asked if I ever saw her as a woman and not just my mother. I told her coldly that I barely saw her as human, and she reacted as if I'd slapped her.

Anyway, my mother has been dead for about six or seven years now. I have no idea whether my father is still alive, since I haven't talked to him in five years.

>>684627437
Hey doc! I have the flu too! I want to die.

>>684636473
if it that´s true may have several meanings.
You feel comfortable here, but you thing you are doing something wrong at the same time
OR that you think you spent too much time here and being here can feel more like a cage than a entretaiment
OR that you have been on 4chan several years where nothing really changed about your dialy life so you could associate that monotony with 4chan

>>684636174
[email protected]

>>684635349
my ex was just like that. I got to know her pretty well and thought a lot about it. I always thought it has some deeper meaning or is a bit fucked up and psycho, but I think I was pretty wrong. I think that most women are like that to some extend. The physical part is just a kind of fetish and not really that unusual or special. Problem is that your boyfriend (like me during the time with my ex) seems to be pretty emotional. The only thing that helps in this situation is if you are honest to him and tell him about your desire in hope that he is able to cope with that in a neutral, objective way. Thats pretty much to require though, if he is a sensitive person. This may not really go as planned for you, which leads to the possibility to break up and search for the things you desire. You gotta be a bit careful though, because if you are a man and a sadist, who likes to enjoy stuff like that, its pretty usual to bring other problems with it, you should not underestimate(most of those guys are psychopaths, who try to deal with their own problems like that, it also can get pretty dangerous if you look for stuff like it online). I dont think our society is ready enough to cope with fetishes like that in a good way for everyone.

>>684636747
Sounds hot man.

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>>684636134
*Oh, i'd actually like to understand what's behind this dream i had.
I was near my highschool where i attend for education, long story short there was this kind of a riot between normal persons and animal like ones. The humans where accusing those animal likes persons of capturing and eating humans, after a while a boy that resembled a tick captured three of the smallest humans among us and brought them inside the highschool, i ran inside and i had this hammer between my hands, it was very dark inside the school but i saw two figures in the dark, they were a two girls, the dirst resembled a fox, while the second a skunk. I immediately felt myself engulfed in this abnormal anger and i ran at them while swinging my hammer with the desire to murder them, luckily enough they managed to escape my assault, and this the exact moment where my dream ended.*

>>684627437
I have a hard time pissing under pressure, know any ways I can get over this?

For the past year and a half I have started to notice everyday objects like bushes and shadows begin to distort into threatening shapes, almost resembling scary faces and entities. Also, I have began to become more and more depressed, moody and empty feeling. My family has noticed this and has become worried for me. I think it wouldn't be such a bad idea for me to check into my local psychologist about this.

>>684637683
i have that too. What helps me is the imagination to piss on some cunts face. Just imagine a fucking asshole or cunt or whatever in your life and you go full niagara falls mode immediately

>>684637683
Do multiplication in your head,
Srsly - I thought it was a joke when I heard about it but it works for me too.

>>684637583
well.
Let me sumarize.
Animal people are accused of killing and eating man. They are in fact capturing people. They take someones and you go to rescue them almost killing two animal girls. You say you are very angry but at the end you are glad they are lucky enough to scape. The only question i need you to answer to be able to interpret everything is. How did you feel once you wake up? Scared about what you almost did? Proud of being brave enough to trying save people? Please, respond

>>684634939
samefag.
>>684632772
>>684627437
any advice you can give me op?

OP left like, 40 minutes ago guys.
let the thread die

>>684627437
shoo shoo retarded jew

>>684636980
Email sent

>>684636747
Youre an interesting person anon. You write well, have you considered a book? It might help your depression as well.

>>684636134
ive had my jaw lock up several times in dreams

>>684639047
I'm a published writer.

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>>684638517
*Yes, i was almost shocked about what happened, i did not expect that kind of reaction from myself and that anger scared me because even if it was just a dream i can still recall that i've never felt that kind of wrath against someone, i'm not a pacifist but i would never come to this kind of methods to obtain what i need/want, unless we consider situations where my life could be endangered by someone's actions.*

>>684639271
Really?

Id like to read your books but I understand if you dont want to reveal your identity in this cesspool.

What genre (s)?

>>684639564
Generally graphic novels.

>>684639564
Lovecraftian horror. I also made a living writing custom porn for a few years. And >>684639675 is not me. Since the shitposting has started, I'm out.

>>684627437
Tits or gtfo

one of my best friends of 5 years has just started blanking me, and for no good reason i can recall

it just feels like he's sick of me

>>684639812
Was the email also not you?

>>684634224
Bump for response from OP