Sometimes when i hear about people dying in their sleep, I become envious.

>>684064399
I feel you.
I woke up around an hour ago and was a little disappointed that I did.

Adding to that. I'm not really depressed, I'm just extremely indifferent.

>>684063650
worthlessness. empty. no one loves you.
>haha yeah. true

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>>684063650

>>684064791
I'm either disappointed in myself or in others. When i share my feelings with others i get a generic response.

>>684065135
yeah... Then after a while you just stop confiding in people
Then you end up here, where you find the most disgusting, insensitive, offensive people on the internet are the only people who come close to understanding/giving a fuck about you hah.

Why not just live not caring who lives you? Why not do something useful?

>>684066152
>no drive
I don't care that noone loves me. I just basically have no will to live other than the fact my body hurts when I stop doing things that keep me alive.

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>>684063650

>>684066289
Do what i do and live for yourself. I've never been anyone's first choice for anything. People think that we'll always be there just waiting. Live for yourself and make them regret doing you wrong.

>>684066660
I do. Problem is that I don't enjoy doing anything anymore. At all.
And not maintaining connections with my friends just proved I was the only one who gave a shit about my friendships.

>>684063650
im sure you're not worse then me. I literally have no friends, not a single 1. I don't work, I live with my mother, and collect money from the government. I keep myself happy by playing games all day long, or watching youtube/netflix/ whichever video streaming service i have access too. So nah you're not the worst i bet.

>>684067783
lol I used to play video games... then they stopped being fun. Now I basically just lay in bed all day.

>>684067907
If you live alone, you're better then me.

>>684068000
-.- never get trips when i want them

>>684067907
go get a job move out ur parents house and make something of yourself rather than sit about like a useless cunt maybe

>>684068000
I do not.

>>684068135
lol. Why? What's the point? I'm fucking worthless. I might as well just wait to die.

i lie a lot and hurt people emotionally

>>684068171
then how do you get away with laying in bed all day? surely you'd be put into a mental hospital for your own safety. Unless you're lying, which I think you are.

>>684068333
WTF WHY WHY TRIPS WHY

>>684068333
because I have an overprotective mother who just enables me while only nagging slightly.

>>684068385
>>684068333
trips dont lie

>>684068303
u really gonna fucking chuck it up to that shit? whats the point in anything in life? if you can't answer that yourself then an hero

i would rather be depressed and lonely and jack off all day than be dead

>>684068506
>then an hero
first off; it's BECOME an hero.
second; I'm a coward.

>>684068478
yea thats my mother as well. I've tried commiting suicide before in the past and all she did was keep an eye on me, not send me away anywhere. I just play games to keep myself from thinking suicide now. Play old games, surely you can find joy in those. The nostalgia factor alone should help.

>>684063650
Got no excuse, phagot. Just sad. No real reason, except maybe too much stress and not enough sleep, but in general my life's fine.

But I want to end it.

>>684068592
thanks for pointing this out, i like the original meme to be intact. nobody says become an hero anymore

>>684063650
You're not, your brain is just fucked. You have deficit of certain neurotransmitters, that's it. It's treatable.

>>684068689
Nah, I tried playing an old Final Fantasy a while back. Couldn't get past the third boss due to disinterest :(

>>684069526
maybe something thats not on an emulator. I find emulators make you lose interest in a game fast. Get yourself a console and play it on that.

>>684069694
It wasn't an Emu.
I also tried playing Majoras Mask, my favourite game of all time... I couldn't get past great bay

>>684068592
oh okay anon im so sorry please i beg ur forgiveness pls spare me ur inconceivable knowledge i feel my melon cracking
i do hope you're as much a pussy as you say you are cunts like you dont deserve freedom from this fuckin cesspit excuse of life

>>684069866
majoras mask is not a good pick, also depending on which final fantasy you chose as well. Try something easy to ease yourself into getting back into gaming. Playing something hard at first can be frustrating. If all else fails though then maybe try drawing if you're good at it. If not, maybe try finding something you use to enjoy, whatever that is. If all fails and you have nothing left to fall back on then maybe becoming an hero is not such a bad idea. I know though that there are ways to keep yourself from feeling sadness, just gotta find it. I never let my sadness through anymore, and when i do i just load up a game, or some music.

>>684069911
you're forgiven anon. don't sweat it.

>>684070375
Problem is I always typically enjoyed darker or more difficult games haha.
Might see if I can ebay Mario Sunshine or something... That game ruled and was easy as shit

>>684070685
people change sadly

>>684070685
i replayed parasite eve recently. great game on the darker side

>>684070767
yeah.
Thanks for responding btw.
It's really easy -here especially- to be a distant dick. in fact it's basically expected. It requires effort not to be.

if u really feel everything is worthless then go on anti depressants, what u got to lose

>>684070934
i've been in your shoes, so im not gonna be a dick.

>>684063650
If you have any interest in changing, you need to quit deprecating yourself like that, because whatever you think of yourself will be so. All those assertive/ambitious people got that way by radically changing their inner dialogue.

>>684070980
sadly I have a psychosomatic problem with swallowing pills. My tongue always gets in the way.

>>684071171
they had training, someone like me and op don't have that type of training.

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The problem is your lazy ass lifestyle and the people behind it supporting it. I was the same. Age 21 living of my parents(who where kind, but never teached me how to be a man). No friends, the only guy that sometimes invited me only did so they could laugh at my autism. School was long gone, onces id got all A's, but could not be bothered. Iv eventually hit rock bottom and didnt want to do anything with humanity anymore. Started living in the forest. Not like into the wild, i came prepared. Made my own garden and knew the area wel. Eventually met up with a Hunter who hired me as his scout/servant(i think out of pitty). Bought camper with the money.
FF 7 years. Im right now laying in my camper, about to ace the third year of mechenical engineering and go for my masters. Could not be happier. Have many nerdy friends that i love and that love me.
Mfw my parents softboiled loving love ruined me
Mfw i actually can be happy
This is a true story btw.

>>684071583
I call bullshit.

>>684063650
I'm not one so I don't need an excuse. Feel free to down some bleach though.

>>684071583
sweet, congrats man.
I'm 26 and have already done the whole college/university thing and I still have absolutely 0 desire.

>>684071805
don't listen to that guy hes clearly writing a script from some anime or even a movie.

With the low I've sunken to, time has lost meaning to me. Holidays and birthdays of people in my life and I barely care, it feels like another day. Half the time I spend wondering if I should just jump into on coming traffic. Suicide never does sound bad when you're already dead on the inside.

>>684071955
if you watched half of a movie and it sucked; noone would blame you for walking out early.

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>>684071916
Want more proof?

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>>684071172
Get a mortar and pestle. Crush them into powder, dissolve in water - or add to food.

It works for getting cats to eat meds, it will work for you.

>>684072283
that proves nothing

>>684072283
virgin?

>>684063650
well i used to fuck roadkill before i got my hunting license

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>>684063650
I threw my life away over a lie, thought I was in love but really I was just escaping from reality and became a psychotic, lost pretty much everything. I dont have the balls to just put it back together again and I kinda doubt sometimes if I even should in the first place.

>>684072283
Dude, you're doing good. You only have couple things in sink. You're managing your life shitton times better than most people.

You're gonna make it.

I don't know if it's due to too much anime etc, but I find myself unattracted to women now too.

I don't like those fucking moeblobs, but shit, what's the point in trying to get a relationship when women are either sluts, SJWs, liars, morons, ugly as sin, or all of the above

>>684072650
Curious - how does deer pussy feel?

>>684072737
thats not op and hes also a liar.

>>684072650
kek flesh light didn't cut it?

>>684072430
Than believe im writing an anime script. Either way the point is that i found my own fire. Op has no fire because there is no need for one. Its actually a huge problem is some countries.

>>684072938
you found nothing, now gtfo.

>>684072770
you have your faults too, finding someone like yourself with similar interests is all you need, they have dating websites for that.

>>684064833
Are you passionate about anyone or anything?
>inb4 bait

>>684072664
you're me in the immediate future
like tomorrow kind of future.
holy fucking shit
but im not you, im gonna fix it

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OP here.
For clarity, these are me
>>684063650
>>684064791
>>684065425
>>684066289
>>684067445
>>684067907
>>684068303
>>684068478
>>684068592
>>684069526
>>684069866
>>684070685
>>684070934
>>684071172
>>684071402
>>684071805
>>684072770
Not that anyone cares... Kinda makes me miss tripcodes though

>>684073009
No i will not Gtfo. I truely want to help Op unlike your faggy ass that is just all negative. Lighten up, take a fucking banana for christ sake.

>>684073251
And does fixing it look like? Also I might still fix it, not sure yet.

>>684073209
I'm well aware. It's another reason I don't go out.
I don't want to inflict myself on anyone who ISNT shitty either.

>>684073400
what does*

>>684073373
i haven't been negative to op actually, i told him how to deal with his depression, all you did was give a fucking manuscript to some shitty story.

Op the best thing you can do is cut all moneyflow right fucking now. Go all cold turkey. You either die or come out a man.

I'm 18 and I already want off this ride.

>>684073373
Thanks. It's cool that you found that awesome life for yourself. Living out in nature seems neat, I'm just lazy and have no drive I guess haha.

>>684073460
And thanks to you too man. Just talking about it helps more than nothing. Reminds me that I actually exist, I just don't know what I can do right now other than wait for it to go away.

>>684072813
quite awesome. european deer has a very tight pelvis.

>>684072932
i tried to ignore my desires, tried to control them.
tried to use something else for my pleasure but that just did not work for me.
i own a fleshlight, but i like a little bit more body to work with.
i am not attracted to humans at all and plushed toys just dont do it for me.

so i ended up screwing dead animals.

>>684073699
It doesn't particularly get any better. Sorry.

>>684073748
op no one can survive in nature without having money. This guy is a bullshit artist. Or if you do you wouldn't not come back to society and be able to get over your depression or be even functional in society.

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>>684073296
>>684072770
I have about a dozen different medical conditions, i'm one slip from being expelled from school, my grandparents closed my bank account, i have zero interest in romance/sex, financial aid doesnt wanna halp cuz no grades, because i couldnt pay i couldnt register for classes and dorm housing saw i wasnt enrolled so have sent letters saying i got 30 days to pack my shit or they evict me. And I'm not sure i can afford my apartment im trying to move in to for more than a year. and today i discovered my doctors diagnosed me with depression without ever telling me.

Yet i smiled today. Git. Fucking. Gud.
also, ama i guess.

>>684073952
Maybe, but it's still a romantic notion regardless of it's truth. Man vs Nature

>>684063650
all i want is a sweet little sister to cuddle and love.
didn't ask parents to make one.

>>684074075
yea its nice to see on a tv show or anime, but reality sets in its just not possible without money.

>giving a fuck that you don't give a fuck about anything.

Are you faggots 15? You'll get over this sooner than later. Either you become a normie or you just stop caring and go on with life for no reason.

In the mean time do get fucked up all time. Whether it's tripping/amphetamines/benzos/black out drunk.

If you can't feel something on drugs then you haven't done enough of said drug.

If you mean what you say about your apathetic, nihilistic, existentialist. Then you have no reason not to.

Hello, from someone who has already gone through the retarded annoying stages of life. I have nobody, no passion, no reason. Fuck it, ride the shit out until it's over.

>>684074102
it would be neat to have an imotou to dote on.
>>684074144
yeah, but right now basically anything is a fantasy to me haha. A normal life with a good job and a relationship is a fantasy

>>684072770
You don't look at any of the pic threads here and feel anything?

>>684074270
if you want a good job then go get one, i don't care for getting one myself.

>>684074302
Occasionally resentment. Not much else. Otherwise I just scroll past.

>>684074411
Good is subjective.
By good I mean a job that gives me lots of money for doing not a lot and is fun; basically a job that doesn't exist or is never advertised. Hah.

>>684074586
be a streamer, hell you don't even have to enjoy games when you are a streamer, you just have to entertain the people that are watching you.

>>684074421
Why do you feel resentment? Couldn't make any connections with women when they were or are approachable to you? Were any attracted to you or vice versa?

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I don't need an excuse. I can do what I want with my time (including being a loser). If you don't like it too bad. People have too high of standards.

>>684074731
I've never known any woman to be attracted to me IRL, even after the fact. The only ones who have ever been attracted to me online were jailbait so nothx.
I tried asking girls out. The most memorable one was I asked out the girl who was my best friend for a year... She never gave me an answer or spoke to me again. Yes I asked her in person.

>>684074718
I would love to, but I stall due to being unsure of how to quickly build a viewer base/how to make a personality that people enjoy enough to make me a partner fast.

>>684075095
watch streamers, see how they are, hell you can be like pewdiepie and just get viewers who are 12. Its not hard, just be loud and obnoxious. Also you don't have to get a viewer base quick, but if you really want to you can just talk to the big streamers, see if they'll play a game with you for views. Its easy. Hell if you're a girl just show some cleavage, stream on twitch. /b/ will raid you and bam you got money coming in. So many ways to get viewers.

>>684074216
This. Right now I'm in the drug phase. I hope to come out enlightened in some way.

>>684075415
If you're trying to emulate an already existing streamer you won't get far. You have to be original in the entertainment business or just very charismatic which he's not.

>>684073988
damn, get some happy pills at least if you're professionally diagnosed

>>684075509
I would advise being careful with this hope for "enlightment." Its very easy to lose relationships and things that are valuable to you when the drugs start to take priority.

>>684074912
Are you on those fortunetelling threads?

>>684075751
bullshit, so many people emulate others and get views. Look at all the fucking streamers that talk over game play. Look at all the boobie streamers all getting views from there tits alone. Its a copy world out there, everything is just a copy of another thing, with very few differences.

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>>684075509
the drugs won't enlighten you, just distract. that's not really the worst thing in the world though when all you think about is shitty stuff

>>684075932
and how many of them are breakout hits?
Very few, and the ones that are successful have been there since near the beginning.

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>>684075509
Also this >>684075792 is very true, don't get caught up in lies and deceit over your drugs.

as my cousin always told me: 'do the drug, don't let the drug do you.'

>>684076118
well like i said youtube isn't really the way to go anymore, twitch is where its at. Plus i mean youtube is becoming corrupt anyways.

I left my fiancée, my true love, the only person who loved and admired me. We were together for 8 years. I left her for someone who doesn't feel that way. Love and relationships are titles and ideas to her. I left her high and dry, left my friends and family, left my career and moved hundreds of miles away to be with someone I thought was my meal ticket to happiness. I was so wrong

>>684076229
true, but with twitch you kinda have to sit on one game forever... I watch Trump a lot and his viewers die as soon as he swaps from Hearthstone to literally any other game.

>>684063650
Maybe you should come up out of your parents basement and step out side. Get some sun on your face maybe get a job? Maybe become a productive member of society.

>>684076460
You set up a scheduale kinda like a real job, a few hours you play one game, another few another, next day you play a different game so on and so forth you'd also get alot of viewers by playing more then one game and keeping a timer of what you're playing that month/week. Its really not that hard.

>>684076698
what's the point?

I did this from 18 to 23. Therapy didn't help at all.

First try psychedelics. It sounds like dumb hippie magic, but after a few rounds my attitude improved dramatically and it stuck with me years later.

Second, preoccupy yourself with something you feel is productive. Work, school, walking.. I don't think it honestly matters. Occupy your anxiety in a non-sedentary way.

Third, get some sun, or get vitamin D pills. I think this is terribly overlooked.

My life is far from ideal, but for what it's worth my heart legitamitely emphathizes to your quiet internal struggle. Dismiss or bash it, I've been content.

>>684076804
... This is actually a really good idea...
Wow, thanks anon. I'll make a note of it.

>>684077004
no problem, i have lots of ideas, just don't care to do them myself.

>>684076866
There is none. Don't listen to this faggot. I wish I was in your situation. I also have overprotective mother but not to that extent + I live in a 3rd world country where disability practically doesn't exist. You're literally living the dream.

>>684077055
Is this OP? If so, is this b8?

>>684077055
Care to spitball?

>>684077203
No, he's replying to OP (me)

>>684063650
cereal killers and psychopaths are kings queens and generals you fucking ant fuck off loser

>>684077370
>Cereal killers
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

>>684076385
My current circumstances paralell your own.
>I was so wrong
That's done more for me tonight than you can imagine. Thank you.

>>684077203
im not op
>>684077210
sure, another good idea that people can do is, if you have the time that is, find items on ebay that are cheap, that can easily be fixed, fix them up and resell them. I am sure that this has been suggested before though im sure. Nintendo DS's or 3DS sell cheap sometimes cause no games will load and all you gotta do is fix a pin that is fucked up where the cartridge goes. Lots of things like that you can find on ebay. Of course it requires having a little bit of money which is why its considered flipping.

>>684077661
another idea, once again for flipping, find some broken laptops that say "turns on but doesn't get past bios" usually all it is is a bad hard drive or the hard drive is loose. Lots of small things people don't really look into when they sell "broken" things on ebay cause they just don't feel like understanding what went wrong.

>>684077661
>>684077955
neat. I've always been interested in stuff like that, usually with houses, but due to not being born into money I can't just buy a house to resell

>>684078162
yea, though some houses you can find for free surprisingly, but with a catch of course. Something like housing refugees after your renovate it, or having to pick up the house with a truck (yes im dead serious) just look around though lots of stuff you can do to flip if you're into that type of thing and have even a little bit of money.

>>684078371
sadly I have almost literally 0 money haha.

>>684072664
:L fak

>>684063650
I'm not.
I have no motivation ambition or dreams.

But. Im lucky enough to have someone close enough that can pilot my life for me so im a regular everyday office worker with a decent life.

Thank you Jessica. I've never made any life choices worth making, so im glad when you do that for me.

>>684073823
not op but fuck me that sounds pre fucking shit ):

>>684078879
i mean if you're mom is an enabler im sure she'll lend you money. Or you could get money from the government, you already have depression so just tell them bout how you feel like life is worthless and whatever else you think bout on a daily basis. They will consider you unable to work and you'll get money. First check is always the biggest cause usually it takes a year for them to decide that you can be eligible. Plus this way you can either start paying your mom rent or move out on your own. Course I don't suggest that considering theres alot of people you can't trust and if you get a place thats really cheap you'll wind up in the hood. I know from experience.

>>684063650
I got more money than I can find stuff to buy for, a good family, good education, live in a good country, living in a good city, a great girlfriend, have had a great sex life prior to steady relationship.

Still, Im depressed as fuck. Nothing interests me so I find little reason to keep on living.

>>684079403
it's okay. OP was the poster you just replied to :')

>>684079512
wanna swap?

>>684063650
>That pic

This happens to me, but in reverse, and not just with people but everything.

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>>684064833
I experienced periods of depression, but it never lasted really. It's completely non-productive and you have no interests and can't feel anything.

When that happens, it's really hard to do anything. Some external action must pull you out of it. I guess the best you can do is try to place yourself in situations in which things can happen to you, even if it's just inspiration (read books, attend an event, get lost somewhere, etc).

>mfw 4chanfags are better people than "normal" people
>mfw it's really the end times

>>684080435
isn't it just absolutely depressing. hah

Eventually you have to figure out that nothing in your life really matters. You are going to keep on living regardless of what happens on a day to day basis unless you take the steps to end it. Simultaneously, wasting life seems like a... waste.

So nothing you do matters but you care about you more than you don't care about anything. So live for pleasure. What do you find joy in? Sexual desire drives you? Jack off all you want, when you're bored of that change your focus. Now you care about sex with another person? Okay, pursue that! You're a fat sack of shit now? So what, someone out there will still sleep with you, you just have to try. Change your life a little and you could end up being not ugly. Ugly people get laid all the time, imagine if you weren't even ugly... Like imagine you're a 3, and a 4.5 suddenly takes interest in you. All of a sudden, somebody wants you to be around them and keep them company all the time. And then one day you actually realize that person is the best part of your day. You wake up excited because in 214 minutes, you'll get to see that person for the first time that day and you're excited about it. Then suddenly you get to see them all the time, you move in together and you're actually happy. You've been happy for 2 years and it's ever since this one person entered your life. You improve because of that person, your job becomes a quest to make that person happy and you start to enjoy the new career you've chosen. Suddenly you're married and there's another human running around, breaking shit, and you have no idea how to raise this thing... And yet, you're happy. You fround it, you made something, and it's beautiful. You have a partner and an apprentice and you care, how did this shit happen?

You beat depression by accepting change and finding love. It sounds gay but sorry that's how it is. Been battling depression for as decade, best answer I can give, you just have to never stop fighting. Giving up is for faggots.

>>684081019
I'm just gonna give up and accept that I'm a faggot...

>>684081576
What if you could actually find such a woman at random? It may be unlikely, but what if some chain of events forces her to literally come to your doorstep and you have to end up answering your door? Depending on getting along with each other, wouldn't that save you or, at least, interest you?

>>684081576
You don't really need philosophy or some fucking self improvement book.

Just stop being a pussy and man the fuck up.

Honestly not a single thing posted here will help you a bit until something ticks inside you and feel tired of feeling that way.

>>684082035
Are you a femanon?

Hey guys. Bipolar disorder with multiple suicide attempts here.

I am feeling extremely down now. But I have come to the point where I understand that people do not leave because they do not like us anymore. People leave because we do not have enough energy to make an effort in keeping the friendship/relationship going. We are tired of ourselves, we do not have motivation. And it does not matter how you try to put it in words, when you do not make an effort, people will assume YOU are no longer interested.

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>>684063650
I love you, Anon. You're the best example of being human.

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>>684082308
o-oh... I am?
Thanks.

>>684082273
Nope.

Just someone that hit rock bottom years ago and managed to turn it into something positive and improve myself.

Start with easy stuff. You have the right to feel bad.

Start eating something you like. Realize that life is meaningless. Like a vidya. You can choose to turn it off, or you can choose to play for a while longer. Any social expectation people have of you is meaningless. You are nothing and that's the most relieving thing about life. You are free. And I love you.

>>684082275
serious question; why havent you succeeded?
I like to think people on /b/ are the intelligent sort, even if they're dumb as pig shit.
You must have recognised that some aspect of your attempt would fail but continued anyway knowing that a more optimal method of death existed, right? Or were you saved by pure chance?

>>684082275
What I'm trying to say here is... They do like you. But they think you don't like them back cause you don't show it.

>>684082541
>eat a thing you like
>realise you don't like it anymore
>shit
this is the situation half the people in this thread are at /b/ro.

>>684082744
Then it is time to explore. Make yourself suffer by going out. If you can take an impulsive decision and try to kill yourself, then you can take an even more impulsive decision and go all alone to do something you usually wouldn't do. There is nothing worse than the fear of change. We have to change what we are every once in a while. and it is terrifying. But necessary.

>>684082656

First time: tried to hang myself with a belt. The structure on the ceiling I tied the belt to broke. I felt like shit, I really wanted to stop suffering.

Second time: took a bunch of sleeping pills with vodka, fell asleep and then woke up puking all over myself.

Living under this condition is quite hard to explain. I didn't want to die. I just wanted to stop suffering. It felt just too bad. I wanted to rest from the pain. But then I realized that the pain would go away if I waited long enough.

When I go through the "maniatic"(happy) episodes of my disease, I can't recall how I felt when I was going through the "deppressive" episode. And vice versa. So I tried my best, I started to leave notes for myself. Trying to remind me that I was gonna feel better later. But sometimes the impulse to stop the pain beats me, and I do stupid shit. Maybe a part of me doesn't want me to go. It is just a natural reaction to the pain.

>>684082661
How would you know that they actually like the anon?