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hey guys so listen, i got like no fucking money, I will do f
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Thread replies: 146
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hey guys so listen, i got like no fucking money, I will do fucking anything for money, whatever, i'm a writer and a cartoonist and i got a good voice i guess, i'm funny and expressive, and of course there are things any human can do, i'll do fucking WHATEVER, i just fucking need money you guys.

email [email protected] if interested
>>
say "probably a 6" on vocaroo and i ll see if ur good kid.
>>
>>684009634
k gimmie one second
>>
i lied i ll never give you money sry bro but do it anyways thatd be nice
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>>684009890
gl getting paper btw x)
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>>684009890
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0R9UcnBXLbN
Whatever fuck you God I hate you
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When do you need it?
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>>684009890
what do you need it for anyway, you need voice acting? i'll do it for free anyway
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>>684010253
Like, whenever, I mean i need it now but im gonna need it in a week or two weeks as well, i aint picky
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>>684010304
It's just a meme. You do have a nice voice though.
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OP I remember beebo. Also will 10 dollars do?
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What are the other options man ? Are you sexy Irl?
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Suppose I want you to shit your diaper publically?
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>>684010552
THAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANKS
>>
>>684010630
fuck YEAAAAH 10 bucks would do, oh SHIT, that would be THE BOOOOMB, also yeah man, beebo was funny, right? good times.
>>684010808
sigh...yeah im probably a 8
>>684010827
aaaah goddamn, i dunno, how much you paying bro
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>>684010953
Do you play runescape?
>>
virtual blowjob for whoever can give this junkie some drug money
>>
Does your cute butt stink for daddy?
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>>684011207
sure does
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>>684011066
I do not, BUT, I can learn! you want me to farm for you? i can farm for you
>>
>>684011353
Tell us how naughty you are with it?
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>>684010953
actually if i was taller I'd be a 9, that's my one flaw. this one bitch friend of mine once went around the dinner table explaining how everyone has negative facial features got to me and said that she cant knock it
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>>684011410
No I don't play runescape.
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>>684011493
Very, so very fucking naughty
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>>684011665
come on man
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Can I like .. stay in this thread and talk to you? It'll bump the thread :-)
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>>684011714
Do I need to make you post your poopy littlr boy panties?
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>>684011876
whatever increases my chances
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>>684010953
You don't have to be a cunt about it because I don't have alot of money you fucking selfish piece of shit.
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>>684011940
Where you from ?
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>>684011876
sorry i thought you were this guy
>>684011933
yeah man you can totally chat with me, its chill

>>684011933
Whatever daddy
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>>684012058
DUDE, im SO SORRY, i actually was NOT being sarcastic, I SERIOUSLY WOULD APPRECIATE THE TEN, SEIROUSLY I WAS ACTUALLY EXCITED, PLEASE DONT GO
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>>684012071
So cal
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That's a bad boy and a little potty chair for you to
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>>684012058
please god, i wasnt fucking joking, pleeeease dont go, i seriously was amped
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>>684012132
??? Did you mix this up a bit
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What's your favorite Rage against the Machine song?
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>>684012365
Let's chat
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>>684012449
nah i was saying, i thought YOU were the poopy guy, and i was saying, yeah bro lets chat its cool, sorry if that was confusing
>>684012716
You know its not a band I ever got into. I guess whatever was on Tony hawk
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jokes huh. Very funny.
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Who wants to do a poopy? Make daddy proud
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>>684012058
PLEASE DONT GO OH MY FUCKING GOD PLEASE DONT BE GONE, I AM SO SORRY I SERIOUSLY NEED YOU,
ok i can see how that sounds sarcastic, too, maybe i should dial it back. but yeah, no actually what i should do is start replying vocaroo so you can hear how earnest i am
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Sooo ... you wanna share what the money is for?
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>>684013147
I want to do a poopy. I want to make daddy proud.
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>>684013168
Food for me and my cat
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>>684013265
That's right in front of all these people on b? Nice and big
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>>684013521
And so my parents dont hate me for moving out and becoming destitute right away like a fucking moron
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>>684013550
Of course daddy in front of everyone but it'll still be for you, especially
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>>684013670
Mmm good baby. Pants, diaper or potty? Tell daddy
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>>684013576
I mean ... what are you gonna do afterwards? Get a job?
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>>684013939
Hopefully I land one soon, yeah

Man I am so goddamn pissed I scared away the one guy that was gonna hook it up, FUCK
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>>684013867
Pants
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>>684009353
fuck i hate beggars. take a long walk off a short ledge m8
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>>684014256
Fuck off you faggot
He knows hes an asshole, dont rub it in now
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>>684014256
Like the ledge of your thumbnail?
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Oh wow. I haven't thought about Beebo the cat in a long time. What a great flash series. I'm going to go be sad about the inexorable passage of time now.
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>>684014122
Good boy bend over and make a stinky
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>>684014741
I dont know if you actually want me to now or what but i mean if youre paying i'll do whatever, seriously
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Have you sold some of your useless personal belongings?
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>>684014388
true, i am fully aware i suck
>>684014631
that shit was so goddamn funny back in the day, huh
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>>684015285
And you'll smile and say "I'm daddy's little stink butt"
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>>684015616
yep, sold them aaaaaaaaaaaaall. I own nothing besides the guitar my father gave me which i refuse to sell, and my dell latitude laptop which i got for free. I have three things I got on Craigslist which are the last things i was gonna sell cause i wanted to give them to someone but fuck it
>>
>>684009353
get a credit card and spend it off than just cancel it when ur done
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>>684015727
I will do whatever, but we gotta talk money
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>>684015895
I dont think I'd even be approved, but maybe
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Mmm how much? Doesn't it make you crazy hard?
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I will give u money to be my friend
lets say £100
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Got any sincere emails yet, op :-) ?
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>>684015952
You nervous? Hahah
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>>684016424
It does make me crazy hard, for shitting in my pants and posting the picture of my shit in pants on /b/, fifty bucks. 25 up front another 25 afterwards? is that about right? or is that too high?
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>>684016496
dude seriously i would love you forever, thank you god
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>>684017151
lemme check

i said [email protected] right? yeah nothing yet
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>>684017545
That could work suppose I want your smiling face?
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>>684017191
i mean, im more depressed than nervous
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>>684017793
uuuuuuuuuuh, how about 40 then.
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Ok but why depressed?
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>>684017793
i mean, nah i aint posting my fucking face on fucking 4chan, bro, i mean, look, you wanna email me? we can do this shit right now, we can fucking do this but i gotta have your word, i gotta know who you is, i dont this shit getting out, this has to be legit and honest
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>>684018284
No money, im hungry, cats pissed, life sucks
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whats the money for OP
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>>684009353
Blow me
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>>684018548
Drugs
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>>684018548
so i can live, and feed my cat at the same time.
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You poor thing I can't make you it doesn't sound like you're ready to stink your butt my boy...sigh
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>>684018835
this was not me, i aint spending this shit on drugs. though how i did end up with no money is kind of a funny story
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>>684018867
I WILL DO IT, YOU HAVE TO FUCKING EMAIL ME, god, you know this is fucking, like youre already taking advantage of someone who is in a shitty position just do it or dont do it
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and i am SO pissed, SOOOOOOOOOO PISSED THE DUDE WITH THE TEN BUCKS LEFT.

and what about the guy with the 100 british-dollars!?? hes gone too?? uuuuuuch
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>>684018912
Tell the story then, friend
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>>684019122

>100 british dollars
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>>684019136
friends took me out to a strip club and bought me drinks, I meant to take out 2 bucks and give it to the stripper, afterwards she got off stage and started asking if i want a dance and im like no no no and shes like well that was very generous and im like what? and apparently i gave her A HUNDRED AND FIFTY BUCKS, and me and all my friends tried to explain it was accident but nope, she and all the other women and people working there wouldn't have it.
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Have you tried pan handling? Not a permanent solution but it could land you some cash to get you by a few days-weeks.
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>>684020336
>>
set up a donations page or somethin
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How old are you? You may have said it already but I missed it. What about prospects? Surely you didn't just peace out of your rent's house with no plan.
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I'd love to help but how do I trust you? You just need a good cum to feel better
>>
Try online surveys or if you've got nothing else, spend all day on swag bucks. You can rack up gift card points by watching ads and shot pretty quick.
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>>684021281
do online surveys actually work in getting money?
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>>684021017
nah im a fucking moron, im 25, no education, moved to LA to do stand up, its way fucking harder making it than i expected. Saved up money but its blown. I don't get money from my folks again for a long time.
>>684020461
You mean like street begging like a hobo? I mean, i dont know. I guess I could.
>>
I'll throw you $20 bucks to see a video of you spitting on someone's shoes. Only if you make it clear that it was intentional. I'd love to see their reaction
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>>684009353
Ehh beebo how's it hangin
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>>684021281
aight, sounds kinda good, thanks i might give it a shot.
>>684021277
Is this the poop guy again? what are you talking about now? email me if youre serious
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>>684021604
hahaha this guy gets it.
>>684021555
I'll probably do it, email me so we dont lose contact, aight? tonight theres a lot of hipsters walking around, I'll do it to one of them so i dont get knocked the fuck out by a cholo
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Try talking to some of the more affluent churches in your area. I've known some to give out small one time loans. Don't be afraid to ask for help before its too late. Wouldn't want you and your cat to end up living in a refrigerator box.
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Stand up? Any jokes OP ?
:-)
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>>684018912
Explain why you're broke
>>
Do you want to poop like really want to?
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fuck this guy
another broke dick poor anon here who cant feed himself nor his dogs..
also i would like to be able to see my mother but she is also broke and needs 50$ to be able to get to me.. if anyone would like to help feed me and my dogs or be a saint and help me see my mother her paypal is
[email protected].. anything helps really and i will do whatever you fuckers want.. im seriously hungry and desperate.
>>
>>684022462
No
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>>684022042
I get very little money a month from my folks to live on, if you the story above About the strip club you see how I accidentally lost a fuck ton of money, now I'm broke for the next month
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>>684022519
Go make your own thread anon. But dont expect me to bump it. Smh just hijacking like that. Its not cool you worm.
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>>684022543
THAT WAS NOT ME. yes, I, OP, like I said before, will do and say whatever you want, yes I wanna do poop like you're a god or whatever. Just email me even tho it seems like you're a troll at this point for sure
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>>684022543
Your a big boy now!
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>>684022519
You probably aint even willing to spit on shoes or shit your pants OR eintertain /b/
Fuck you
>>
>>684022839
fuck you dude im starving and my dogs dont have much longer to live
they dont deserve to starve while also dying
i have applied for jobs everywhere but i dont even have a bicycle im so poor so i have to walk everywhere and nobody wants to hire me
i also would like to see my mother as she is far away and is working her ass off sleeping in her fucking car every night because she cant afford a hotel as she just started working again
im starving and starvation makes people do desperate things..
if anyone will help me out ill do whatever disgusting shit you pyschos would like to see.
>>
You could always join the military
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>>684023128
gimme a good faith portion of money and i will make a video of me spitting all over my asshole brothers shoes.. try me i will deliver unlike OP's faggot ass
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>>684023349
Listen anon ... Fuck you.
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>>684023706
suck my dick you failed comedian.. stop talking and deliver you asshole these anons are offering you money and u wont even work for it.
FUCK YOU BUDDEH
>>
Email sent
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>>684023880
That wasn't me. But I'm not a failed comedian dummy, I just started
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>>684024016
tell me a joke then
entertain me mr. entertainer
>>
>>684023349
OP here again, I'd like to see my mom too bitch but I ain't trying to beg people for a vacation you ass
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>>684024170
Aight hold up lemme get vocaroo up
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>>684023880
Im not your buddy pal
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>>684024255
theres a difference between a vacation and seeing your mother for a fucking weekend whom you never see
also i really am just asking for money for dog food and some mcdonalds or something because im hungry as shit and so are muh doggies
you are just another faggot OP who wont deliver jack shit
>>
>>684024514
im not your pal, fwiend
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>>684024401
do it and ill send u some prayers.. all i got as i said before im dirt broke[:
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>>684024773
Uhh ... what
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>>684024925
i want to fuck the crazy out of those eyes holy shit shes hot
>>
Check the email stinky
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You could get a job OP.
>>
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>>684025054
U think so anon?
>>
>>684025216
he has a good ass job, he's a comedian

louis ck makes plenty shillbux[;
>>
>>684025335
no not with that hair.. u ruined my boner
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>>684010133
For a sec I thought that was broteam pill
You Canadian?
>>
so yeah i really dont wanna commit a crime tonight can any rich anon send me some money and ill do whatever you want.. no self mutilation tho plz.. well for the right price ill do whatever i have to actually.. [email protected]
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>>684025439
Oh man ... sorry anon i thought youre an eye guy
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>>684025877
>eye am but that hair was just a helluva turn off
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>>684024401
Op here, sorry it took forever, anyway this one usually does well at the open mics
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1ROnqAgtnoZ
>>
>>684025815
somebody have a heart and at least help me feed my dogs if nothing else.. they dont deserve to starve in their last days here.. im really bummed out about that shit. u can see in their eyes how sad and hungry they are
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>>684025493
What's broteam?
Nah I was born in LA, moved away when I was a kid tho
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>>684026289
Srsly get your own damn thread
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>>684026199
Uhh ...
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>>684026199
...maybe consider a new line of work buddy

i really was hoping to at least get a grin but uhh you are just not funny man

thats seriously the best you have? like fuck dude.. and fuck you im staying in your thread till it dies cause im scum and i have much better reasons than you to be begging on 4chan for neetbux

>>684026491
kill yourself
>>
>>684026199
i laughed more at a fucking puppet show than that.. seriously i cringed imagining you saying that shit joke live on a stage
you need to be more self aware of how shit you are at this comedy shit..
who tf convinced you it would be a good idea to move to LA?!
you know there are hundreds of undiscovered comedians that are 100x funnier than you
>Sam Hyde for example is hilarious
>>
where did you go OP??
Thread replies: 146
Thread images: 25

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