>>680792308
I do that as well but with your mom

>>680792308
I mean pillow not mattress but whatever

>>680792308

This is so fucking tryhard.

Only newfags and retards would find this even remotely weird. Its also probably fake as shit since foam mattresses are grippy and rough as fuck, that would scar your dick over time. So nice going cutting holes in your mattress to impress some faggots on an anonymous image board.

>>680792308
>sweet cummies

kekked so hard

>>680792308
I unironically like black people

also come post video games
http://instasync.com/r/v4c

>>680792308
If you notice small pillows turning up in places where they weren't before, congrats you are now a father.

>>680792308
>memory foam mattress
No

>>wash my dick in the sink

>>680792494
Something makes me believe you know more of this topic.

I get fully naked and sit on the toilet like a gargoyle when I take a shit

File: 1458463347284.jpg (10 KB, 200x200) Image search: [Google]

10 KB, 200x200

>foamginas

>>680792960
I've heard this can prevent STD's after sex. Just wash your winky in the sinky 'till there's no more stinky.

Ok mine: sometimes I get a migraine headache, and the only thing that stop it is if I sit at the back of my bathtub while the water falls on me. I know it can't kill the pain, but it's the only distraction that makes me not cry out in pain. Also, I'll start vocalizing low sustained humming sounds that end like a sigh. Very mind over matter, I suppose, but any medicine short of heroin or that one that's made for migraines specifically doesn't do shit- and I never have one of those stupid pills handy when it hits.

>>680793229
If I'm home, I usually take off my shirt to shit. Getting fully undressed putting your clothes back on seems like a bit of a hassle, esp. when I shit like 3 times in a day.

File: 1459117425659.jpg (69 KB, 300x300) Image search: [Google]

69 KB, 300x300

>>680792308
>foamginas

fucking classic

File: maxresdefault.jpg (160 KB, 1920x1080) Image search: [Google]

160 KB, 1920x1080

I fap to minecraft porn daily

>>680792308
If true, this is just fucking sad. Like, really sad dude. Get a life

>>680794234
As someone who enjoys cartoon porn, this is weird as hell to me. It's like jerking off to cubist art.

>>680792494
tell us more about tryhard posts

>>680792308
Wow OP, small holes

>>680794436
>>680794234
>ITT: fapping to rubiks cubes in videogames

>>680794436
>>680795280
leave him alone guys. He is just trying to stay ready between match reloads

>>680793681
I sit in the shower with migraines too. Water hot as fuck

File: I wanna fuck that.png (9 KB, 381x396) Image search: [Google]

9 KB, 381x396

How much lube does it take to not feel like your dick is getting ripped off?

>>680796597
If it's a Fleshlight, the more the better, since it can tear if it's too dry. I
If it's pussy- well, I'll go ahead and paraphrase the great late Isaac Hayes: You gotta give time for the bread to rise. Unless she just doesn't get wet or you don't do it for her. In that case, treat it like a Fleshlight. I jerk off daily dry (my precum does enough), but every once in a while the Spider masterbating aid comes out and I need that bottle of lube.

>>680796277
mahnigga.jpg

>>680793681
>>680796277
trying this next time, thanks migrainebros

>>680793681
try different strains of weed if you're living in a country that allows it.
or just try illegal weed and see how it works.indica/sativa/everything.
i've heard types are good for headache relieve while others don't exactly help

I count words or phrases, making the end result being 8

>>680792494
Where's the hate coming from friend?
What's wrong

>>680793681
Both LSD and mushrooms work wonders on migraine, anon. It works on super low doses too, in case you don't want to trip.

I sniff/lick used tampons and vigorously fap until I blow my load all over my belly. Good times.

I have a sink in my room and piss into it, this is normal I know, but I shit into garbage bags and collect them on my balcony until I throw it away saturdays. I just really don't want to meet my roommate and I'm afraid to go in our bathroom. I'm a 22 year old student

I enjoy pineapple, shrimp, and tuna on pizza.

>>680793229

Brad?

>>680800069
Posts like these make me feel so fucking good about myself. I think "at least I'm not like anon, he shits in garbage bags because he's so socially awkward that he isn't even capable of meeting his own roomate."

>>680800052
pics or it didnt happen

I stay hydrated by drinking over a gallon of water a day. Sometimes 2.

Every time I wipe my ass, I sniff the toilet paper. Don't know why, don't care. Not going to stop.

>>680800653
That's ate the fuck up dude

>>680800069
Same

>>680800999
nice doubles and trips and also I'm happy I'm not alone. high five

I put conditioner on my dick and pull the shower curtain tight to the edge of the tub and fuck it. Feels awesome. Just make sure there is no mold.

>>680792308

File: 1428420969875.jpg (11 KB, 320x272) Image search: [Google]

11 KB, 320x272

>>680800999

>>680801161
>Just make sure there is no mold
kek

>>680792308
I like to fantasize about below average girls

>>680800052
I sniff pads too for the sake of the smell (that stale blood/copper smell) if that makes you feel better

File: ec6.jpg (64 KB, 600x400) Image search: [Google]

64 KB, 600x400

>>680792308

>>680801149
Dubs and Trips... Isn't that a full house?

When I first separated with my ex wife, I went out and fucked 6 different land whales. It boosted my confidence, so no regrets, but I fucked some really fat bitches.

>>680801584
>584▶
>When I first separated with my ex wife, I w
No harm no foul.

>>680801584
Now anytime I get down I go find a fatty

>>680801489
no because this isnt fucking poker you complete autist, the internet isnt the real world

I'm 26 and when I'm home alone I play with my little Lego men for hours, they go on epic adventures throughout the house I actully have keep them hidden from my fiance it's like I'm hiding some weird sex fetish from her and I'd be so embarrassed if people found out but I can't help it

>>680792494
Who hurt you?

>>680801161
Dafuq? How disgusting are your hygienic and cleaning habits have to be to worry about mold in your shower?

File: 1461396195621.jpg (206 KB, 1280x960) Image search: [Google]

206 KB, 1280x960

>>680792308
>The smell.

File: whatthefuck.gif (2 MB, 280x202) Image search: [Google]

2 MB, 280x202

>>680792308

>>680800421
Wonderful.

Erm... I cum in my foreskin for easy clean up.

>>680802325
Don't have one
>feelsbadman.bmp

I count my steps....every fucking step I take and then start over after I reach little destinations I make for myself:)

I do lot of weird shit when I'm nervous like
> rubbing my hair, on public this is humiliating as hell
> biting my earphone , if I listen music
> playing with coins,
> doing kungfu exhaling
> starting to chew gums (by using all of them at the same time)

>>680802890
None of those are unusual... I only do a couple of them, but I know people who do all of them.

muie mircea

well i do some weird shit

heres my turn

in private
>I often fist my ass
( started off with a finger or so, kept going )
>often cum in my boxers and leave it to dry
>wank with moisturizer on cause it feels good and plumps up the dick for a couple days
>get turned on by incest in other families but not my own

Socially
>nothing
>apart from being too confident at times
>and im a bit naughty

thats it pretty much

what do you think, am i weird?

>>680803228
Are you like 13 or something?

>>680803732

nope im 32
>still a virgin
>ugly AF
>weigh like 30 stone
>have aids
>work from home
>got aids cause i got into a fight with an aidsy guy and some blood got into a cut i had :(

how old r u?

I shart when I cum

>>680800015
LSD does work

File: kek12.gif (2 MB, 322x252) Image search: [Google]

2 MB, 322x252

>>680804676

>>680793681
You don't have the pills but a bathtub handy?

>>680804676
Virgin aids? What, you shared syringes? Your mom was black?

my story

>be 24
>be black ( i know... ) :(
>hate my race cause we sell drugs and we are anti social as fuck
>we blame people for being racist just so we can get away with what ever we want
>somehow hope hitler won the war and killed all niggers so i would have been born white
>whites look better
>whites act better
>whites are superior even as a koon i admit it

>>680792308
Don't let the bedbugs bite.

>>680805426
can you not fucking read?

i said
>got into a FIGHT WITH AN AIDSY GUY
>AIDS BLOOD GOT INTO A CUT OF MINE
>NOW HAVE AIDS
cunt fuck off back to your 14 year old world some people struggle in life you know
like me
im a real man and a real person and your just a faggotity faggot

File: 1449652441950.jpg (305 KB, 1803x1371) Image search: [Google]

305 KB, 1803x1371

>>680805481
Literally. God knows what kind of ill diseases they'd carry around after years of dried up jizz

File: hqdefault.jpg (12 KB, 480x360) Image search: [Google]

12 KB, 480x360

>>680805665
so close

File: 1399666605453.jpg (134 KB, 294x437) Image search: [Google]

134 KB, 294x437

>>680805478
>so i would have been born white

Ill be honest...
i have a vomit fetish

i love seeing girls vomit and want them to vomit on me, kinda like piss porn but with vomit

what do u guise think?

im only 19 btw

>>680805605
So you assfucked a dude?

>>680805605
Damn anon, I truly hope this is b8....if not I feel for ya /b/ro....that shit sucks...

>>680805605
Likely story

File: 1399670224099.jpg (39 KB, 400x308) Image search: [Google]

39 KB, 400x308

>>680805605
>your just a faggotity faggot

>>680805605
Bullshit. The HIV virus dies even if it's exposed to the air for even a second. I'm trying to picture how you would get it during a fight and it just seems impossible.

>>680793950
>>680793229
I like to underss while shitting aswell, it's not mandatory but when i know i'm gonna be sitting there for a while, i just undress and push like a super sayan transforming.

File: chanJackie.jpg (28 KB, 552x360) Image search: [Google]

28 KB, 552x360

>>680805833
its not that bad
>i work from home
>i wont die old
>aids medication is amazing with illegal drugs
>fuck it atleast im not a nigger or Hitler

>>680806039
M8 HIV is an infection that leads to AIDS
AIDS can be transmitted via any bodily fluid except saliva ( spit )

i told you... it was blood

i wish it wasnt true but you should fuck off and die
why do you think im on 4chan??!?!?!!!

>>680806039
If you punch someone in the face and your hand gets wounded by teeth.

>>680805605
This kind of hypothetic hiv transmission is so unlikely. I don't believe you

>>680805478
nice try

>>680793950
>when I shit like 3 times in a day.
anon, you should probably see a doctor.

>>680801867
Kek

>>680802585
>>680802325
I do something different.
When i'm about to cum, i press my fingers on the vein that's providing the cum, so i basically block the flow and i don't cum but still get the orgasm(although sometimes some cum gets through, if i didn't press tight enough)

>>680806348

i didnt ask you to believe me, i dont care if you dont believe me

what do you want me to do? magically not have aids?

you didnt even know that HIV leads to full blown AIDS
you said that HIV does when in contact with air...i said i have AIDS FULL ON AIDS

point is fuck you, dont believe me if you dont wanna

>>680792719
Underrated post

>>680805478
Kys faggot

>>680806548
doesnt that feel horrible?

>i put up traps on my terrace and I capture birds
>when i capture them I pursue to masturbate onto them every day, then I let them go after a while

>>680806548
>veins
Kek

>>680806655
whats kys?

>>680793229
This is not weird it's the right way to take a shit

>>680806628
Several persons are responding to your post, i'm perfectly aware untreated hiv leads to aids

I work in the restaurant business. Have for about 16 years. I can't even begin to guess how many pounds of my boogers people have eaten. Our how many pounds of my DNA in general. I lol when i think about it. I worked in several major Chain restaurants that were all in super busy locations. Bon apetite!

>>680806679
no, the orgasm is pretty much the same after you get it right, since you're holding the vein or whatever in the middle of the dick, there's not much space to continue jacking to extend the orgasm.
>>680806685
i don't know how the tube that provides cum is called.

>>680806717
He wants to kys you. He likes you

>>680792960
i do this

>>680806897
The urethra, you piss through it
If you are squeezing your balls that could'nt work, 90% of your cum comes from the prostate... So i guess you squeeze your dick?

>>680793136
>>680794885
>>680799474
>>680801898

Samefag OP desperately trying to cover his autism tracks.

>>680806958
he wants me to kill my self?
or he wants to kiss me?
his can kiss my blood if he wants, it tastes good


>>680806897
doesnt it feel like the cum should come out and it doesnt? doesnt that feel bad?

in my experience i need the come to fly the fuck out of my dick

>>680792494
Only correct anon.

>>680806897
Retrograde ejaculation can cause erectile dysfunction you know?

Seriously, find a new method if you think your dick working is worth a little cleanup.

>>680807158
I press the "urethra" tightly, i block the flow so to say. Imagine your whole hand around your dick, so instead of that i just use my index finger and my thumb and press the urethra part.
I don't think it's healthy tho.

>>680807473
>>680807483

>>680806039
Why the fuck do you think they had to start cleaning the blood off of the floor when Magic Johnson came into the NBA?

>>680807473
i've heard that a few times.
I make sure i cum normally once in a while so i guess that's my "protection"

>>680806548
That'll break your pee valve.

>>680805605
You can't get aids like that you fucking retard

>>680807634
It doesn't matter dude, the damage is being done every time semen is going into your bladder. Seriously there's gotta be a better option.

File: at2.jpg (30 KB, 549x488) Image search: [Google]

30 KB, 549x488

>>680792308
>foamginas

File: 1461299603070.jpg (27 KB, 281x350) Image search: [Google]

27 KB, 281x350

Sometimes I'll be half asleep and jump up because I think I have a cigarette in my hand even though I never fall asleep with one in my hand.

File: 1290709106229.png (7 KB, 403x309) Image search: [Google]

7 KB, 403x309

>>680806680

>>680807772
oh... the semen is going into my bladder, well i usually pee right after i cum so i guess it's not that bad?
Well i live with a roomate who rarely gets out and i'm used to porn so i can barely masturbate without porn, let's say in a shower(takes forever). so whenever i get the chance i masturbate.

>>680801867
Fuck dude, I used to do this to with those little GI Joe figures, the ones that are completely flexible.

I don't need the sets or anything, just a plain GI Joe figure and I make my own shit up around the house.

But then I broke it..and it's not the same if it broken..

Been doing this from childhood. ..

I would what what my gf would think if she found out.

>>680807717


read this >>680807623


you actual cunt i know enough about my own condition you fucker

What the actual fuck is wrong with you?
I masturbate in the shower like normal people.

>>680807772
He's retarded let nature take care of him. That way he won't be able to have kids.

>>680808452
how do you watch porn in the shower you dumb cunt

File: 1460324805976.gif (2 MB, 480x270) Image search: [Google]

2 MB, 480x270

>>680792719
>my sides

>>680792308
I'll bet your bedroom smells amazing.

Sometimes I have dreams where my grandma has masterminded every "failure" in my life and if she had not been carefully impeding my progress at every turn then I would have achieved far greater success at this point but I would have lost something. Grandma knows this so she has to protect me but I know this can't go on forever and I think to reach the next stage I have to put her down. I couldn't do so without learning the secret of what I would lose if I succeed. Grandma has to have this information forcibly extracted. Then I wake up.

>>680808885
now thats what i call a fucking turn on

>>680808885
What the fuck dude

>>680793681
Hey migrane bro.
Had them for like 15 years
Really bad= anti inflammatory pill [why my insides are so fucked, highly suggest agaisnt nsaids]
Bong hit = working within 5 mins, sometimes even stops them or lessens them if I catch b4 the outbreak.
Warm shower
Meditation - lay down somewhere flat, relax, and loose yourself in the patterns. [Harder said than done but worth trying]
Ice pack on neck nap time
Ignoring it and trying to fight through it is the worst but has been all too nessesary when I was living in the corporate world. Jobs and such....
Find your triggers and hope they are avoidable. Gl bro

I squeeze my body fat and mead it like bread. I'll push my man boobs together and run my finger down the hairy crack in my chest. I also push my flaccid cock and balls into my body and cross my legs and wait to see how long it takes for my dick to pop back out.

File: 1461430986518173951104.jpg (714 KB, 2048x1152) Image search: [Google]

714 KB, 2048x1152

I just came on my wall

>>680792494
You must be fun to hang out with.

I really, really, really enjoy the smell of my stank balls

Like to pinch and roll he skin between my fingers till they get that oily residue on them, then sniff it into oblivion.

I have no idea why either, because I would hate to smell another persons nuts, and I hate the smell of my gf's vagina when its sweaty.

Just my own.

Can lay on the couch and sniff my nuts for hours.

I'm make. I can't pee without sitting down. Well I can but I haven't in years. One time the bathroom stalls were all full at Cici's and I had to pee really bad I sat on the urinal. Maintenance guy walks in there and leaves like he forgot something