>>680463015
I'd still eat her dusty cream egg cunt out any day.

>>680463282
My mom saw me type this and I have to say sorry now. Sorry guys

Did you find this beaut in Oxford?

Get tons of matches but the bitches never message me back. I'm fairly certain that they're all bots.

She reminds me of

watch?v=8pIeSYhipUs

>got tinder to try it out
>nobody ever taught me the basics of it
>mainly that most of the girls on it have just come out of long term relationships and are looking to get back into one
>the very first girl i meet from there becomes my girlfriend
>18 months later still is
>tried to open myself up to a world of sexual adventures and immediately got tied down

>>680464059
get fucked son

>>680464599
dad please get off my taiwanese basket weaving forum

>>680463015
>on Tinder for about a month
>going well, caught up with 3 girls
>4th girl, go over to her house
>start fucking, hear noise come from wardrobe
>get up to look, guy in there filming an jacking off
>wtf, start kicking the dude
>grab the camera, grab my clothes and bolt
>never again

>>680465506
Fuck him in the ass

>>680465506
Spoil sport

>>680465506
Since you have the camera, post the video

>match with girl
>says she's bald in her profile but clearly not
>open with "bald? i hope you mean your vagoo"
>"i have alopecia"

>>680463697
This.
Dumped it because of that.Just tried bumble for 24 hrs and deleted with prejudice,its a cuck app.

>>680463367
Kek

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>>680463015
"Daughter... where are you?"

>>680466564
haaaa

>>680463697
>>680466634
autists detected

>>680467628
Yeah just be good looking and you have no trouble

>>680467315
Haha you read my mind anon

>>680466634

Damn...guess I'll stick with old ass OKCupid then. At least got a little ass using it, and a girlfriend for five months before she realized how boring I am.

>>680466721
samefag, here's your (You)

>>680467895

It's Tinder. You have to match. I'm not just creeping on random bitches out of the blue. They had to like me too.

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>>680466564

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Not as fun as it sounds, bitch was crazy and showed up and my house in the middle of the night

>>680463367
Put your mom on the computer. I wanna talk to her. She sounds hot

>>680463367
Tell your mom tits or gtfo.

With timestamp

>>680468731
that sounds fun.
also that sounds too good to be true.
why would a girl looking like that be this easy, on tinder AND looking for a serious relationship all at the same time.

>>680468731
She wanted to have a marriage set up while you're asleep

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>>680468731
jesus...

how did you get her to leave? I imagine if you told her you maybe possibly weren't 100% interested she'd disembowel you with a pair of kitchen scissors.

>>680468731
Poor you, pussy on tap, turning up in the night needing filling up

>>680469014
>why would a girl looking like that be this easy, on tinder AND looking for a serious relationship all at the same time.
Because she was 18.

>>680469074
>how did you get her to leave?
I didn't at first.
>have houseparty
>tell her that I don't have time for her
>made the mistake of telling here where I live earlier
>not exact address, but pretty recognizable house and big party
>girl suddenly stands in my living room
First I saw it as free sex delivered to my door and went with it. The days after I saw her scribble something in her notebook and looked through it, saw my name with a heart in there on the day of my party and the day we met again and other days in the future. Names of other guys on other days, also with a heart around them. There were small notes next to each that noted where she met each of us and what happened on the date.
I made up an excuse and somehow managed to get rid of her by not answering her texts or returning her calls.

>>680469524
Dodged a bullet there.

>>680463015
Studying maths or the human race to see if her kind can populate Earth?>>680468731

>>680469524
eh, i've had worse. shoul've kept her as a fuckbuddy, seems like she would have been ok with that role.

>>680468731
Shitthatneverhappenedtome.txt

The day after I broke up with ny gf I Had a match with a pornstar and fucked her the day after , best day ever

>>680469926
but then she'd probably lie about birth control or poke holes in the condoms

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not a particular horror story, but that basically 50% of girls on tinder are this. "intersectional feminists" whose entire personality is one big defensive blockade against any kind of human intimacy.

a lot of them are big fatsos like this one, but many are actually decently hot. it's just sad that the disease of feminism has infected so many girls. i hate that the pool of potential mates has been so reduced by this. sometimes i wanna just kill myself or go gay.

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>>680470072

moar of hambeast

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>>680470122

moar 2

>>680470072
stay strong anon, don't become a faggot.

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>>680470173

moar 3

>>680469524

>made the mistake of telling here where I live earlier

i used lovoo alot... made the same mistake once... rented rooms on per month basis afterwards because some of these bitches should be put down.. or at least in an asylum

>>680470072
>>680470240
>not a horror story

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>>680470240

moar 4

>>680470173
Fort worth ? I mighta fucked her last month.

>>680470051
that's why you only trust yourself with condoms. also with her being this good looking and 18 she's not really the demographic for that.
the 25 year old 5/10 is who you gotta worry about.

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>>680470317

last moar

>>680463015
Proving once again, if you put an average girl next to a fugly one, it makes the average girl look really hot.

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>>680464059

>>680470364
I'm sorry to hear that

>>680465506
>>680466191
Yeah dude post video

>>680470373
this bitch gon die alone

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>>680470072

>not a horror story o0

>>680469965
who? buck angel prob

>>680470072
>donttouchme69
Great username for someone that's on Tinder yet 'doesn't want to fuck'.

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>>680468731
>bottom right picture
>kike

>>680470686
Na proxy paige

>Meet a few girls
> Sex
> Meet one and hit it off well
> sex is great
> 2 years later married and have a kid with her
> No regrets

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OC from a trip to tennessee

>>680470122
>hambeast

kek'd

>>680463015
ah that sucks... no doubt she mostly gets replies from people who think 'hmm well it is 50/50, it could be the hot one' instead of knowing full well it is guaranteed to be the munter

though if you didn't pull on night and were drunk... I mean she's got a decent 21 yr old's body - just switch the lights off and I'm sure she'll be super enthusiastic. Some hot girls can be a bit complacent whereas with that little hobbit you can probably do whatever you like....

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>>680463367

>>680470856
was she loose as fuck after all the horsecock dildo videos shes done?

>>680464059
>tried to open myself up to a world of sexual adventures

>built a relationship around monogamy.

Son, your problem is that you have balls of cotton. I found my gf from okcupid. On second date we had already discussed and agreed we are both into polygamy but also want something stable.

3 months in, she is looking for girls for our relationship under my direction. And of course there is a good amount of shit I have to do to maintain this but it's a hell of a lot easier to take care of my girl when she is making sure to take care of me too.

inb4 you found a hoe and all that jazz, she is indeed way more open-minded than the average silly bitch but then again I never invested in an average silly bitch. If something's not going to work from the beginning there is no need to work on it.

>Meet QT Asian
>She think's Tinder is a dating app, not a let's fuck app
>It's cool, we have a nice time, she agrees to fuck
>Like halfway through I realize there is blood on my dick
>Thought she was on her period
>She wasn't, literally wouldn't stop bleeding
>Had to drop her off at the Hospital to "end" our date

>>680470122
>professional blogger tumblr

Kek

>>680468731
you missed out anon

>>680471164
how does it feel to know that you gave her permission to fuck guys behind your back?

>>680471097
Unfortunately I didn't do anal with her so I don't know, her pussy was just fine. And just so you know She can suck cock like a maniac. Best bj ever

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>>680469524
She sounds like a female version of pic related

>>680463015
It kinda looks like Dren from splice

>>680471264
I'm sure he dodged a bullet. As a good looking man in his late 20s, these girls will be the downfall of you. It might be a tight pussy/ass for a night but she will literally never leave you alone and will make your life hell because you tricked her out and she doesn't know what to do with herself now.

asking for a friend, what if you are that horror story.

>>680471315
That aint a bad deal if youre allowed to pick up women behind her back.

>>680471164

I've been in an open relationship for 20 years. Few problems, tons of sex and a lot of homemade porn.

Good for you!

>>680468731
I know who dropped her off in the middle of the night... her last tinder date. Serious, my friend who has done this a few times says a lot seem like they are fucking their way around America; getting a ride to new tinder date, fuck for some resources, ask for ride to next fuck-date, repeat...

>>680468731
I bet she had aids

>>680465506
similar story

>meet girl on tinder
>2am one day
>text her and ask if she wants to fuck
>she agrees
>fuck her
>accidentally fall asleep next to her
>wake up to the sound of her boyfriend coming home
>decide to not get my ass kicked
>hide in her closet until he gets in the shower
>run the fuck away

>>680465506
At least you got a camera

>>680471430

Why does it have to be "behind her back"? I tell my wife I made plans for Friday night, she makes plans for Friday night and she comes home in the morning and makes me breakfast.

Last week she came home while Becky was still here. So, I fucked them both.

>>680471520

I bet you'll never have AIDS or any other STDs.

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>>680471536

>>680471408
Shes just lookin for a little guidance man.

>>680469074
Kek, chopper Dave. I gotta watch that show now.

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>>680463367
Stale pasta

>>680471576

Why did you name your real doll?

>>680471674
You don't guide crazy. You fuck it's brains out and never talk to it again. You get your one-off and call it quits.

She will literally ruin your life and she knows she can do it.

you must be ugly or something.

>>680471812

>you must be ugly or something.

lol aw anon, why you gotta try and make it personal? Good luck being so bitter lol

>>680471988
Nigga what

>>680472042
Good luck being naive. :^)

>>680471365
>welsch?
Wat

>>680472114
Thanks man lol Its woked out pretty well so far.

>meet girl at her unit
>start watching movie on couch
>lose clothes jumps on my lap
>doin the dirt while im sitting on the couch
> grabbing her ass i feel something hard brush my hand
>minute later i catch something hard and moist in my hand, its shit
>throw her on to the floor, grab my clothes ran outside naked and fled.


fuck that

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Got this cutie a while back. We were talking and it was all good and then I looked closer at her pictures.......

>>680472228
Good fucking god I'm dying

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>>680472287

>>680470605
One of my mates has been dating a tumblrina hamplanet for awhile now. Don't underestimate their ability to get guys whipped.

>>680472228

Better than covered in shit while she's on top of you and litterally looses her shit.

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Finally, a thread where I can dump all my uglies.

>>680472352
>>680472287
Are you saying you wouldn't fuck her and then dump her because she's a cripple? dude thats rude as hell

>>680471783

To make you envious. But seriously, they are expensive and unnecessary. I might fuck 3 or 4 women in a single evening at a swinger party.

>>680470072
>>680470122
>>680470173
>>680470240
>>680470317
>>680470373

Holy fuck that thing is so horrible my dick receded into my body and I grew a vagina.

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>>680472549
>at full time mummy

these threads always make me feel x10 better about myself
im not even that bad looking but i just think im not good enough
then i see these fucks
anyone else relate?

>>680472576
> 5k runner
> runner

>>680472352
You needed to look closer to notice she has a walker and says she has cerebral palsy?

>>680472757
she can still run, she just has spaghetti legs

>>680465506
didnt happen in slightest

>>680472228
Similar one
>meet girl at her house
>older lady
>divorced milf hungry for dick
>we fuck for hours
>i cum inside her and I fall asleep in her bed
>wake up at 3AM to a strange sensation
>lamp is on, she's in between my legs with my limp dick in her mouth and a vibrator up my asshole
>Oh God it feels so good but I wasn't prepared for this in any way
>my body jerked and the vibe slipped out
>liquid shit squirts out of my bungus
>turns out she put a towel there
>she starts moaning and picking it up slapping it against her pussy
>im on the verge of throwing up
>get my pants halfway around my ankles and and run the fuck away
>she is still moaning in the bedroom
God I used to jerk off to so much scat but the smell was so horrendous it put me off for life

>>680472827
Her gum game is strong

>>680472778
I just thought she was sitting down a lot in her photos.

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>>680463015
Ask me whatever

>>680472576
>>680472778
I don't care that she has cerebral palsy, but her eyes, they're soulless.

>>680472880
>spaghetti legs

My sides

>>680472649

I didnt know we were talking about swinger parties lol that shit doesnt count. We both know youre getting 4's and 5's in that shit. Might as well pick up chicks at 2am in a bar nigga lol

>>680472894
holy shit

>>680472689
>titus andromadon

>>680472909
Could probably scrub up a bit and gain a couple of points

>>680472909
Aww

>>680472926
I wanna see your main pic that everyone swipes thru

Matched with the perfect girl a few weeks back. Super cute, could hold her own in a conversation, funny, about 3-4 years younger than me.

Anyway, I wanted to meet up with her right away but she had to go out of town, and when she finally was back I had to be out of town. We kept chatting in the meantime and it was amazing. Seldom have I harmonized so well with a woman and I was super eager to meet up.

At that point I was fantasizing about the search being over. I thought I had at last found the one.

The day comes where we meet up. I invite her for some drinks at this little upscale lounge near my apartment where we can get drinks and talk for a bit. I see her walk in and she is drop dead gorgeous, even more so than in the pics. I thought I had hit payday. She sits down and we begin to talk, and that's where things started to fall apart.

As infatuated as I was with her, and even more so in person, it became clear as time passed that her appreciation of me was the complete opposite. I have been on many tinder dates and through experience I can easily tell within the first 10-15 minutes whether an interaction has a future or not. All logical signs pointed to the negative, but I did not want to yield. I could not give up on the girl of my dreams. So I pressed on and made the awkward affair a 3-hour-long one.

At the end of the night I went in for the kiss, and surprisingly she did not turn away. But it was a passionless kiss, like one you would give a relative. I sat there kinda defeated while we waited for her uber to show up. We said good night, and she climbed into her uber.

The next few days I made desperate last attempts to perhaps salvage something, but she completely ignored my texts. It hit me fucking hard, /b/, not gonna lie. It was a huge loss and I was overcome with grief.

I'm starting to see new women again, but they don't even come close to her, and it's depressing the shit out of me.

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>>680472926
Fucking weak match game

>>680473041
> share your chinder horror stories

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>>680473083

>>680472576
dude, remember where you are

>>680472926
>200 matches
>opening with yoyoyo
How many of the did you actually meet?

>>680473136
Asians dont count

>>680469524
>2016
>"I saw her scribble something in her notebook and looked through it"

yeah, life isnt a 90s chick flick. fuck off

>>680463015
full name of the chick on the right? facebook page?

>>680463015
She looks like she's halfway to turning in to a cat on an Animorphs cover.

>>680473234
Fuck

>>680473197
I'm half japanese Elliot Rodger >>680473136
mayn what am I supposed to do

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>>680472880
>mfw spaghetti legs can run a 5k and i cant
Im not even mad

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>>680473041
>mfw she looks like Watto

>read up on some marketing/PR/sales classes/courses/books
>match with a girl
>get to talkin for a little bit
>apply all that marketing shit where you have to seem interested and try to connect and pay attention to her needs instead of my own
>"amagawd we're so alike i feel such a deep connection!!'
>ask her if she ever did something crazy
>like meeting up with a total stranger and having sex without speaking a word/getting to know them not even for 5 minutes, just for the hell of it
>actually convince her this is a good idea, she says it sounds very exciting and 'amagawd we has connection!!!'
>the next evening she tells her roommates to leave and tells me i can come over
>i show up, she opens the door, wearing a sexy tight dress, she's just as good looking irl and her ass is the second comin
>i try to say hi and kiss her on the cheeks but she kisses me on the mouth
>we kiss all the way to the bedroom and have sex
>then we go to her kitchen and she opens a bottle of wine and we talk and laugh about how crazy we are
>we've been fucking for 2 months now and she says it's all she wants what with her very busy schedule, job, part time job, student organizations etc.


I like what's going on and it's fun and the sex is amazing but there's a voice in the back of my head saying the horror is a coming, and soon too, no sane chick can just accept that shit and fuck like that

>>680473116
I feel you on that dude. I pictured the whole thing. it's not so bad though, 7 billion (+) people, I'm sure theres atleast 1000 people that look like her and act like her.

and heres most important of all,
if she didn't like YOU, she wasn't any good anyway. why want a girl that wouldnt love you? you're a sweetheart anon, any girl that doesn't like you is an ugly dumb whore. you're a nice guy m8, got all excited amd shit for your date.

you should listen to the other side by frank joe

>>680472970
How was the pussy?

>>680471315
how does it feel knowing that not only I have found a way around it so that neither of us ever cheats or feels the need to, but I have also been fucking her so good she worships my cock.

And she was pretty honest about it all. I ve never made her feel unsafe speaking her mind but rather unsafe to not do so.

Does it itch, knowing you can't even have a gf to begin with?

>>680473221
But .. but I have a notebook as well?
I work in a creative field and noting everything you think of is great.

>>680473442
ANNI?! IS THAT YOU?

>>680472894
fuck me..

>>680469524

>made the mistake of telling here where I live earlier
>not exact address, but pretty recognizable house

Same shit happened to me, bitch turned up at 7 in the morning opens door walks into my living room. I'm sitting there naked freebasing coke and she still wanted to stay.

If I walked in on even someone I knew smoking coke naked and tweeking the fuck out I'd get the fuck outta and let them chill.

I reasoned that she was not of sound mind and I may be getting murdered if I didn't handle this correctly

>>680473478
Enjoy the ride while it last

>>680473484
Found the grill.

>>680473221
Is it 'current year'?

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>>680473611

>>680473725
I don't know what any of this means

>>680472774
>wang

>>680472584
If its middle, I'd hit that!!

>>680473660
>>680473725
>>680473791
>>680473665
This thread is better than YLYL

>>680473665
Could have told you that about Mary part just by looking at her. Fucking dickshitter

>>680473725
https://paintstardust.com/about/

>>680473484
That's pretty gay dude

>>680471453
Thank you anon!

>>680471018
id fuck her still. the issue ive run into though is ugly girls having standards. like wanting to wait til marriage and crap. its like what...

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>>680473725
THE MOUSTACHE

>>680473660
SHIIIIIIT
This isn't an unfunny YLYL thread.

>>680467315
No cool anon, involving family like this.

>>680473974
>To all the ignorant folks out there: queer rape is a thing and doesn’t have to involve penetration to be rape.

>>680473116
some people just don't like you even though you like them :(

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>briefly dated girl, little younger than me
>find out she's a third-wave feminist
>constantly talks about hating men
>intro her to best friends, and my female friend hates her
>she's upfront with her opinion
>feminist tells me I can't talk to her anymore, and must tell her off
>no.jpg
>"breaks up" with me before Valentine's Day
>laugh it off

pic related, her ass.

>>680473665
She looks like one of those dogs whose been stung by bees.

>>680473665
her face
her bio
oh.

>>680473116
Come the fuck on! You felt all that through chatting and never actually spending any time with her?! Jesus Christ.

>>680474070
Men can be raped by women, you feminist cunt.

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>>680473018
There is literally no way that she's as tall as 5 ft.

>>680474260
She doesn't look a day under 70. HOW

>>680473725
http://en.gravatar.com/paintstardust
they have a fetlife.com account
http://glitt3rpaint.tumblr.com/

>>680473665

she forgot...
>chin

>>680473484
Is....is this bait?

>>680465506
Post video you retarded faggot