I sit and walk around once every few hours while I stare a computer monitor looking at the cameras.

>>679424650
I have questions answer them

I sit on a Linux box all day, forced to use chrome instead of chromium and not given sudo.

I make smokers smoke a certain brand.

>>679424650
You run an edgebander. Pain in the ass machine.

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>>679424650
I help retards and old people connect to the internet, all fucking day.

I build large oil and gas extracting machines.

I train new drivers to drive a semi over the road.

>>679425745
Funny you ask I'm having some trouble with that right now what do

I'm a Janitor....yeah I don't think that needs any more explaining

Kill me

>>679425144
whats your questions?

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>>679425928
What seems to be the issue sir?

>>679424650
I design force feedback artificial vaginas

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OP i imagine you drive pic related

>>679426192
>>679425970
No ask just awnser

i do low grade of extorcion that make me 50-125$ month each

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>>679426238
close, i drive this but blue

>>679426295
Nope sorry fucked up at trolling sorry guys

I digitally remove braces from scanned teeth to prepare them for 3D Printing.

>>679426295
Did you just have a stroke?

Jewelry engineer
Get designs, setup manufacturing overseas or local I don't care

Took a break from all that to invent some shit and now I'm dying of anxiety every day until I can patent my work

It's likely someone else will get there before me and I invested too much time into this

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Sound guy... I'm always filled with anger.

I print, pull and fill dialysis bags all day.

>>679425745
Cable guy?

>>679426631
Pleas let there be a doctor in this thread

>>679424650

I'm the director for quality, engineering and developement at a company that manufactures car bumpers for general motors which gets fitted on each new vehicle they build

Just got promoted. My last day of work at my current job is Saturday and my first day of my next job is monday.

Currently, I babysit tards in a group home, following protocols and making sure tards progress with independence, even though they're lazy shits.

Next job, I will be higher up, writing service plans and protocols for bottomdwelling cucks to follow for tards.

>>679424650

I put frozen food on shelves in freezer cases for morbidly obese food addicts to purchase

$15/hr

>>679426688
Salary?

>>679424650
i'm supposed to be optimizing the design and function of rapid diagnostic kits that test for shit like malaria and anthrax. i literally haven't done anything in 5 months and my bosses either don't notice or don't care. i had one useful experiment 8 months ago that just warranted changing our supplier for the plastic housing on one project, but that turned out to be unreasonably expensive. since then i just come in, tinker with a few conditions for an hour or two, and then leave. my job has literally become shitposting on the internet and studying for a more interesting career.

>>679427190
Are they still made of thermoset plastic?

>>679427584
Do you get paid well?

I'm a torture specialist for the portion of the sinaloa cartel here in the USA

Structured cabling, fiber optics.

>>679424650
Yo Jed, you ain't a Hutterite.

I make lattes for assholes and tell the other latte makers what to do
Then I sit in the back room counting milk and shit and listening to music

b ump

all post and no reply smh

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I put the helicopters together then I take it up the behind by my boss for not doing it fast enough

I reach out to people who have mild interest in purchasing something they wish they didnt have to fucking pay for but law requires them to and it rapes their monthly income

insurance agent.

>>679427559
Basically shit. Sound guys are the last thing on production lists

>>679427716

yep, polyprop all throughout

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>>679426484
HA I was so close

>>679427559
8.25/hr not bad for a chef at Wendy's

>>679425421
?

>>679425912
You from Montana?

>>679427777
Fucking checked

Pretend to know how to program in C#.
I'm the right combination of pleasant, funny and nonthreatening to float just above getting fired.

i work in a coal washers i when i say work i mean that in the most loosest terms

>>679427777
no it's like 75% of what i should be earning at my level but more than enough to live on if it was just myself. for the time being my wife doesn't work and our parents have to help out sometimes.

I go door to door asking people to donate money to save the bees.

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Chef at Wendy's

$8.75/hour

>>679424650
I test dildos, large ones.
I'm a guy. I get to cum my brains out several times a day.
Actually, I product test lube products for those dildos.
It's OK.

Also I'm currently applying to police auxiliaries: $19/h to basically work the front desk and do reports (for shit that isn't critical) at a precinct. Will help when I actually apply to become a cop

Im a flexographic plate maker i make the stamps on steroids that print pretty much anything thats isnt printed on paper or thin carboard like tooth paste and cans of coke and the condom wrappers i leave on OPs moms floor

>>679424650

DICE LA employee

My manager is a fucking cuck

I date mature women.

I love my job.

I would do it for free, but I'm a classy broad.

>>679428396
see
>>679428613

y u gettin undercut that extra $20 a week fam.

also you guys are some of my favorite people ever because i fucking love wendys

>>679427777
Checked

>>679427190
where do the materials come from? What has been outsourced in the last 10 years?

>>679428479
I live in California.

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I work a forklift in the shipping department of a chicken plant. I'm at the asshole of the beast that shits out millions of pounds of chicken boxes a week. My job is to take and organize the pallets by their order numbers in a storage rack after the niggers stack and wrap them. The niggers are gay

I take a truck to your shitty houses, pick your stupid shit up, pack it in a truck, and pray to satan that you give me a tip for working 12 hours to transport your weird shit.

>>fed up.jpg
what fucking old lady has two men come move shit and have a clearly labeled box that says "fun" left open with nothing but sex toys.
>>>can't unsee

>>679428613
>Chef
>at Wendy's
>Check at a fast food joint
You're not Gordon Fucking Ramsey.
You're a corporate peon.

I own and am the sole employee of a laundromat with 24 pairs of washers and dryers.

My day consists of cutting checks for $1500 a month water bills and mopping floors.

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>>679424650
I make da pizza
I put da pizza in a bag
I put da pizza in my car
I type da address in google maps
I blast some sikk beets
I drive 2 da house
I giv dem da pizza
I git tip
I drive back
I repeat

>>679424926
haha ur a security guard nigga i used to hire fags like u

I learn and research applied mathematics

I sell big pieces of polished and painted aluminum wrapped in tightly stretched steel and polyester belts coated in a silica/rubber compound to chimps so they can roll around town feeling great about their $500 Cadillacs and Lincolns from the 1990s

>>679424650
Im the QC tester at a dildo factory. Its a pain in the ass.

>>679429060
How much revenue do you pull in?

>>679424926
I've listened to a lot of creepy pastas involving your job. You are one brave soul.

>>679429275
Ayy

I need a job please help me anons

>>679425421
>>679428433
Obviously marketing for cig company

>>679425386
No sudo? How do you get anything done?
Unless you have root, then nevermind

I'm machinist. I can make dildos with ridges out of stainless steel on a lathe.

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>>679429035
Fuck you guy

>>679428923

mostly BASF for both our paints and plastics

Outsourced by the car manufacturers? Everything ... they hardly assemble vehicles there anymore, most subassemblies are outsourced in their plant as well.

>>679424650

I deliver mail
I cum in your bills
I dont give a fuck

>>679428305
yeah, what do you do/ drive?

>>679429351
great job for a /b/tard actually

with some employers they pay upwards of 20 usd per hour. gotta be big and a guy though and sometimes they make you go through firearms training

>>679429177
Marjonez?

>>679429535
stainless steel dildos could be an untapped market. Make that thing smooth and you have a business. Not sure what your friends will think.

I find outliers in a dataset, well the script does, i just press buttons and go beboboopbebo

>>679424650

I am trying my best to assist in the construction of an fairly exclusive restaurant. I draw the schematics electrical systems for two big kitchens, lightning junctions, cat 6 networks etc, and make sure my guys are up to the task of putting all that in the right place according to swedish code. The project doesn't have any plans, blueprints or whatnot, so I have been assigned to create them as I go. It's fun, demanding and horribly pressurizing. You do not want to fuck up. Last week I worked 60 hours.

We are currently building fixtures that are going up above a circular, marble slab clad bar. One single fixture is almost 3 meters in diameter, weighing in over 1750kgs fully stocked (they are supposed to be able to hang glasses and put wine bottles up by the hundreds inside the fixture).

>>679429648
Is that even a fucking name

I run social media accounts for a gay business that has basically zero marketing flair.

I design the physical connections that do inside a cpu.

Residential HVAC work. Just cut the shit out of my hand and i might die of tetanus soon. AMA

>>679429672
Use some high grade sand paper and make that shit smooth. And guess what... No rust because it would be stainless. Imagine a guy claiming it had rust...but then it would turn out to be his own poop. Then we would laugh and then he would buy two more.

i turn cement into various things like sidewalks or curbs for example. currently im working on a raised railway.

I write more and more of an elaborate technical book every day and wonder the whole time I'm writing it if I'll be able to market it successfully

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Sit on my ass watching painted steel go by and make sure it passes some tests. I get paid ridiculously well for the 3/5s of fuck all that I actually do. 12hr night shifts are pretty balls though.

>>679426655
Double dubs, nice.
Don't give up on your dreams, market yourself better

I write Linux device drivers and Android operating system software for a certain kind of electronics used by multi-millionaires.

But I'm overworked and underpaid, so it's not as rewarding as it should be.

I freelance web develop and made a game on the side that is for sale on Steam

>>679429177
Alicia?

I work at a deli in a grocery store. Collage graduate with a stupid degree so im stuck cutting up lox and chicken livers all day

>>679429780
Alejandro?

>>679429937
Marquez?

>>679429631
Plus you get to act like a dick to peoplr and get paid for it. Kind of like cops but you won't have to kill anyone... Unless...

>>679428205
I fix your goddamn helicopters when they get their periods, approximately every 3 months

Chef at Wendy's.

$8.35/hr

>>679429884
The market is already expanding.

>>679430093
I'm not Alejandro, I don't have a spic name

>>679429982
Antonio??

>>679430124
lol yeah.

i remember a thread on this chan 4 or 5 years ago, this guy in a small town hospital worked alone at night shift

went around the whole place and filled up that thread, lasted like a year before being pruned.

>>679430197
How do you make the patties square?! You should get paid 10 bucks an hour because of your wizard powers

>>679430318
No

>>679430286
sincolé ;(

I'm a locksmith.

>>679429262
>THEY SPINNIN' NIGGA THEY SPINNIN

kek

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I'm the kitchen steward in a 4 star restaurant thats part of a spa and inn, basically i organize the kitchen, text hoes, and occasionally help with some fancy food. Free food and $12/hr and a beautiful work environment.

Barista at an Australian cafe franchise

$18.50/hr

>>679430484
How long did it take you to learn to pick a pin tumbler lock?

>>679430197
>chef
Ha nigguh stfu you're a fucking fry cook..spongebob me boy are them patties ready

>>679430474
I also don't have a Eurotrash faggot french name. Don't insult me, anon.

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i run slicers to create portions of bacon

>>679424650
I walk around looking for cars to photograph in one of the best car dealerships in SoCal

>>679424650
Nice Homag brah

I look at asbestos containing material in a negative pressure hood all day and tell contractors/homeowners how fucked they are.

>>679430699
it's just a sort of tradition here man calm down haha

>>679430711
Checked.
What's it like doing God's work?

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I'm unemployed now but I used to be a receptionist for an advice center that would give advice to alcoholics, homeless people, widows, pretty much anyone going through a rough patch

I'm unemployed because I would often come in hungover or still a little drunk from the night before and I don't think it was helping the alcoholics or drug addicts

>>679424650
I stick my fingers up an old man's ass until poop comes out.

>>679430812
I wish someone loved me

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I go into a house or outside and find anything that's wrong or needs to be redone or made.
Get paid by project, only 19.
I'm sure Mexican worker but the white complexion helps.

>>679424650
Great grammar. Plz stay at your minimum wage job. Fgt.

>>679429323
Before costs and taxes on average, $135k per year.

I take home about $60-70k, give or take, after taxes. I don't actually work all that much either so it's comfy.

I take corragted board off a takeoff line and drive around a warehouse looking for spaces to put things...I often fantasize about sticking my forks on my lift into my supervisors chest and parading through the plant..kill me

>>679430907
Pics or it didn't happen

I clean carpets. Dry foam process. Everyone hates our company. It's justified.

>>679430347
I wouldn't want to be a security guard. They always get killed in action spy movies just for doing their job.

>>679430936
actually for $35hr it pays alright

>>679431008
Recreate 9/11. I'm sure they'll like you after that

I put things in your box

>>679430908
well... hope you go do that

>>679431069
69 get lol

>>679430969
You got a haemorrhoid fetish or something?

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>>679430364
Ur fucken stoopid man

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>>679430843

it's whatever honestly doing it for 3 years now, like most things you get bored of it

>>679430689
Schlage, Kwikset, 5 pin, 6 pin, Ford pin ignition? Please be a little more specific? Most people don't even teach picking until you learn impressioning. But once I started actually picking it took me 3 days to get a hang on most standard 5 pin locks.

>>679431126
What's your job boi

>>679431069
you just get to sit there and browse 4chan the whole time.

if you dont wanna do that you could manage a data center overnight and do the same thing with 5 times the pay

>>679424650

I count bottles, deal with assholes, and mix things together. Then I get complimented or shit talked depending on how the guest feels that day.

Soon I'll be doing that but with more pints being poured and fixing arcade machines.

>>679430951
Yeah it seems like a decent business with the right location. How's the riff raff? You gotta have some weird late night stories.

motion graphics designer

$65k/year

>>679431194
Nevermind that, just give me the goddam pic

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I go through your medical records...
You should be taking better care of yourself you know?

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I fill up gas, wash windows, sweep the dirt, wash the floors, fill up drinks, stock up chips, make sure drunks stay the fuck outside, and hopefully not get shit from anybody.

I place a satellite dish on your roof, run some coax where its needed, and connect a receiver to the system to give you television.
Any questions?

>>679431205
Start your own meat packaging business, hold Fight Clubs.

>>679424650
i run 4chan

I manage the credit card products and programs department for a credit union. Zzzzzzzz.....

>>679431208
i cant get more specific because i dont know that much about it unfortunately

have you ever considered a career as a safecracker for thieves?

I teach gymnastics to kids. Not going to lie, pretty fun job. I actually look forward to going to work and seeing what my students can do and challenging them. 8 years running so far and I still love seeing the excitement of a kid landing a new skill for the first time.

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I make maple syrup into candy. Soak it in more syrup to preserve it. I also make maple cotton candy. Go To farmers markets to sell. 80-90 hours a week and i can drink on the job. No stress and lots of ot. Best ive had

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I work at this theater
It's aight

>>679431262
So you're a dentist?

I blend multiple toxic chemicals together to make inks used to print on plastic for the outer wrap of toilet paper and paper towels.

>>679425386

OP said job, not your basement. Pseudo intellectual pretentious ringworm

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Many of the jobs here will be replaced by computer / robot soon. Get fucked minimum wage cunts.

i am the manager of inventory at a major chain pet store

i struggle to keep customers happy while trying to make sure we have correct counts of items to keep customers happy and make sure when prices go up the tags change too

>>679425386
>need sudo
For the love of god

>>679431487
Do you touch the kids

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Whataburger - team member
I either flip meat patties, do daily maintenance like wiping windows or cleaning bathrooms and shit, or I work the fry station. Mostly fry station since I'm the fastest at it. Manual labor all day every day.

>>679431246
Until James bond comes and stabs you in the throat while looking at ylyl threads.

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I cut Titanium.

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>>679431438

>>679430911
I hate those type of fucking bits thats in your drill.

So fucking stupid. Who wants a drill bit shaped like a fucking tenga egg?

>>679424650
I graduate CS and now work for a software company but don't do any development. Sucks, where is my life going.

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>>679424650
I baby sit a bunch of sub contractors who bitch and complain about work i have assigned them.

I design, build, program and commission machines and assembly lines that build large diesel engines

>>679431705
if i die browseing chans thats fine by me honestly

I fold towels for rich assholes and clean. And go to school when im not doing that.

>>679427190

winrar here so far

>>679431205
This is amazing. Making me trip balls.

>>679431685

Although I know what you are insinuating, it kind of is part of the job to spot them. You know, to make sure no one lands on their head.

I'm a cellar hand and lab tech at a ~50,000 case/year (small) winery that makes premium/upper tier Pinot noir. My job would be fabulous--physical work making wine and lots of lab chemistry--if I didn't work for the worst fucking autistic morons on the planet. :(

Feel free to ask questions tho

>>679431457
I don't do safes. I make 17.75 an hour during shop hours. If I'm on a service call, I make regular wage plus 30% commission, and after hours if I'm on call I make time and a half while I'm on a job with 50% commission. It's good money and I did enough breaking the law when I was younger so I'm good on the whole criminal thing.

>>679431685
Fuck yeah mang,
She may be 12 but dat ass is def 16

>>679431922
Do you get to fuck them

>>679431824
as a cs graduate also, i now work for my dads used car dealerships maintaining the computer equipment

75k per year, 20k christmas bonus. worked like a dog for like the first four months and now nothing goes wrong so i just sit around and smoke pot all day and browse /b/

>>679431505
I like your style.

>>679432030
Ya nigg

>>679431888
good cause you certainly are "TRIPping"

>>679432078
Sounds kush. You bastard.

>>679431505
cute dog

>>679431853
Pull a Tyler Durden on their shit my nigga.
Become /b/'s hero with glorious green texts

>>679431848
True. True. I was in the Marines for four years. Never got to kill anyone though. Just sandwiches and tacos after I got out four years ago. I could become a security guard. But I like being a machinist. Makes me feel manly. I have like one chest hair since I've been a machinist. Four more years and I'll have two.

>>679432078
Age? Location?

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>>679425421
what form of advertising for tobacco is still legal?
inb4 cant on radio/tv/billboards since either 80s or 90s

professional fraud

California is retarded, so i take advantage of one of its Medi-Cal programs to pay myself 13 dollars/hr for doing literally nothing

>>679432057

Hell no, ugh, what the hell did I expect from /b/.

>>679431084
Funny you should say that because we rake pretty designs into short pile carpet for maximum gimmick.
I could probably manage doing some fat twin towers in someone's carpet.

>>679425970
Been there.
Furging fugg

>>679431487
I could see this thread just.. Not going in a good direction.

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>>679424650

Test drive new vehicles when they come in for the dealership, make sure they are working properly with no damage from the delivery truck. Install the block heater cord/chin spoiler/whatever it needs. Remove all plastic seat covers and apply fabric guard/paint sealant and drive them over to the lot or the shop if they are getting any accessories put on.

I tell my boss shit is fucked and nothing works right. She yells at me. 2 months and counting....

I slice your deli meats. Also your cheeses. I also heat up chicken and make salads and sandwiches and shit in something my boss seems retarded enough to think counts as "cooking". I deal with your shitty kids shrieking into my ears. I deal with impatient soccer moms who fail to realize I am not only preparing food for them, but doing so in the immediate vicinity of a spinny death blade designed to cut meat, the thing I happen to be made of, so no I cannot work faster unless you want shredded meat that looks terrible or half my thumb in the mix. Don't be shitty and you'll get free food, preferential service and other fun times.

Life is pretty dull on the bottom, but I guess I could always be part time, minimum wage or unemployed.

photograph weddings, web development/marketing and i rate search engine results.

>>679430492
Double kekels take my shekels

>>679432320
23, california

>>679432397
Is California still in state of financial crisis or have they recovered?

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Oceanographer. A technician (only have a masters) and not a "scientist" per se. I get to do all of the cool shit without chasing grant money like a bitch.

People try to buy a house. They don't pay their bills. I tell them they can't buy a house. Rinse and repeat.

>>679432397
>California is retarded
I was gonna call you a faggot but then you said this. Good job, if enough of us pull our shit together we might actually destroy California within our lifetime.

I fix computers and anything related stuff. Also studying Apple shit, how to fix them. I like my job. Not too good pay but very nice company :)

>>679424650
I put black men's penises into my mouth and sometimes anus

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>>679428745
I would very, very much like to talk to you.

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I fix the photocopier after you try to feed something covered with staples and whiteout through it.

Field recording and mixing of TV/Movie/ and commercials.

>>679429890
What's the railway for?

>>679432410
That's kinda gay tbh

I manage the beer portfolio for a high end cocktail bar, as well as tend bar.

That'll be changing in two weeks as I just accepted a position locally for the new Barcade thats opening up. There I will still manage the beer portfolio, as well as manage the entire front of house, fix the machines, and tend bar.

Shit should be cash.

>>679425386
Pretty much me too, except I have sudo. I mean, the machine is right there under my desk.

I operate one of these in a bakery that does about $3000 a day in sales for 8-10 hours a day as a first year apprentice $10aud/hr, shit pay but the people there are good and genuine want to see me succeed...i think

>>679432455
D o i t

>>679432801
I feed things covered in staples and whiteout to photocopiers.

>>679432803
trains

>>679432523
Same here /b/ro

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>>679432856

>>679432532
Do you tell the bride to model for you and make certain faces? Like oh yeah you dirty whore? Yeah you're only getting married because you're a dirty whore and no one wants you oooh yeah. Be a tiger.yeah now be a furry. Yeah you like that bitch.

>>679432896
You monster

>>679432824

you in vegas opening up the 2nd location for Hi-Scores Barcade ?

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>>679432694
> I wanted to do exactly what you're doing now and I'll never get to

Just end my life fampai

>>679424650
Anodizing technician.

Oxidation of aluminum alloys thru electro chemical process for manufacturing companies that make wafers and microprocessors. Your shit would be null and no vidya games if it wasnt for anodizing.

>>679424650
I manage production and design for a musical instrument company in the U.S.

The management part is boring as fuck but the design part is pretty fucking rewarding.

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Field tech at hyperloop

Ask away

>>679432923
/b/ruh don't make me go back

1400-2300 every day is gonna kill me

I animate the stupid cartoons stoners and losers watch on late night Cartoon Network.

>>679432856
I couldn't take being a baker. The hours are so irregular based on whats being ordered day to day, but its almost always way too much time spent for too little pay

I'm a professional opera singer.

applied mathematician

>>679432824

Nah, New Haven. Its a legit Barcade from the guys who opened the ones in Brooklyn, they are opening a new location in LA in a year or two. Thats partially why I took the job, I might see if I can transfer to NYC or LA in a few years just to keep it interesting.

>>679432694
You are a scientist. PhD fags are not the only ones who get that distinction although they like to think so.

>>679432700
But I pay cell phone bill. Doesn't that count?!

>>679433109
Which cartoons?

>>679433109
Pics? Shows?

You Minimum wagers blow.

>>679433109
pretty fucking cool.

I'm an illustrator for an entertainment design company in the northeast.

>>679433154
Can you give the succ well

I work for state government, reviewing others people's work to make sure they don't upload personal information into the wrong clients case so they dont cause a security issue. the job is piss easy and i'm waiting for clearance so i can work from home. i got this job with only experience from temping. I only have a GED and a semester of college under my belt.

>>679433088
I fucking hate the evening shift with a passion. Then you have the first shift cents who don't do shit and leave everything for you to clean.

I own a concrete grinding and polishing company.

>>679427777
Checked

>>679433320
No

>>679433305

Sivak?

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>tfw neet
>tfw neet at 22
Feels acceptable man

>>679433159
So you're really good at math?

>>679432897
We just built an elevated rail for a test run of an engine at my job ( hyperloop)

>>679424650
I sit and watch pills go through a dryer type machine and press a button to paint them and that is it

I travel all over the country installing medical equipment in schools, hospitals, and other medical/health-related facilities.

>>679432460

Yeah, it already has, unfortunately. I mean I expected as much but just not so damn quickly.

I suck a lot of dicks.

>>679433398
Northeast united states, not russia.