Im sorry for being a coward by breaking up over text

But you are a disgrace of a human being.

Tbh fam I love to fuck men

>>677885752
I jerked off too hard last night, now you no longer interest me...

Besides your older than 14 and I like my pussy young and tight

Have u ever heard the tale of Darth plegaus the wise?

I can't cum anymore unless I watch brony porn

I need to feel myself filled with a man, and you can't provide that. I literally cannot stop sucking dicks.

Im sorry but i like fat girls. Kappa

The rest of this message is a lie.

Except this though. Because honestly I love dick.

>>677885752
The dog gives better head than you. Goodbye.

Your mom gives better head too

Actually, fuck you; my dick wasn't something that you could shit on once and get away with it you cock guzzling bitch.

my name's not Rick.

Would yuo look at the time

Since I'm being weird and open right now, I might as well admit I molested a 6 year old girl once.

Fortunately, I've found the love I've always been looking for in your mother, so we will still be together in many less sexual senses.

>>677885752
Sorry, I'm breaking up over text. I'm currently guzzling cum and cannot talk.

Just kidding I still love you, will you marry me?!?!?!

The only time I enjoyed fucking you was when I imagined tounge-punching my grandma

Throating three dicks at once is honestly the best thing that ever happened to me.

My dad ia the best lover i've ever had

pajeet has given me a through ass fucking at his new toilet

According to Freud, we all reach a point of o Oedipus Complex, where we're always striving for the love of our progenitor of the opposite sex..
I think I've never left that phase. I still desire my mother more than I'll ever desire you.

>>677888376
Bait

Don't think of this as the end of our relationship so much as the beginning of my great jihad against infidels like yourself.

OhHhHhHHH SHIT NIGGER you fucked up now? Wanna know why you autistic creature of Satan? I'm sending the video that we made with your little sister to the feds. GOOD SHIT ROGHT THERE

What did you just say to me...

Im sorry but i know you fucked a nigger so i cant be with someone who is into beastiality

But while we're on the topic, I've always wondered: do you wipe your shit from back to front, because your puss tastes awful on the regular?

Hitler did NOTHING wrong

you never would shit in that cup. why wouldn't you shit in that cup?

What the gorilla did you just fucking say about me, you little gorilla? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Gorilla Gorillas, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-gorilla, and I have over 300 confirmed gorillas. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top gorilla in the entire GS armed gorillas. You are nothing to me but just another gorilla. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this gorilla, mark my fucking gorillas. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the gorilla? Think again, gorilla. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of gorillas across the USG and your gorilla is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, gorilla. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your gorilla. You're fucking gorilla, gorilla. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over gorilla hundred ways, and that's just with my gorilla hands. Not only am I extensively trained in gorilla combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Gorilla Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable gorilla off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "gorilla" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking gorilla. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the gorilla, you gorilla idiot. I will shit gorilla all over you and you will drown in it. You're gorilla gorilla, gorilla.

The rest of this message is 100% truth.

My dead cousin watches you sleep

I'm so sorry you had to hear it like this.

>>677889691
All the things I said before now are 100% false.

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Started doing it

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>>677890023

I'm so sorry babe bUT when I close my eyes all I see is dead peoole

>>677885752
Op more screen shots keep sharing.

What is love? Baby, don't hurt me.

Sometimes, I like to cum in my own mouth, then let(make) animals and children lick it out.

Yeah, I'm drunk as fuck but I've always loved you. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me and I'm never gonna give you up.

I would honestly rather fuck an electrical socket than you.

>>677890484
I wish one day you are dead so i can see you when i close my eyes. You filthy swine.

Never gonna let you down.

Never gonna run around and try to buttsex you in your sleep.

I've decided to leave you not because your not worth my love but because I'm not worth yours. i'm a terrible human being and if there's anything you should take from this, it's this... I can no longer pleasure myself unless it's from watching dogs hump small children... I'm not a well man I'm very sick and clearly need help... Forgive me plox, for I shall always love and cherish the time we shared together ... Warmest regards, anon

Remember the time that i spilled the cup of apple juice in the hall? PLEASE TELL MOM THIS IS NOT HER FAULT

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We're breaking up...

I just want someone to fuck me in the ass, because honestly I love Jesus.

UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH there dey go there dey go lets get em niggas

>"(...) I still desire my mother more than I'll ever desire you."
>"Bait."

if I had to pick between Sarah plain fat Alaskan tans dick and you I would Sarah plain you dog fucking nigger

My dad thought it would be better if you knew about us. Sorry.

>>677890340
>are you drinking again

honestly good for her that you are breaking it off. you sound like a degenerate.

By the way, how do you feel about the Buccaneers next season? I think they're offense really has potential.

i'd rather become Porko's child solider's sex slave than be with you another minute

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some faggot started a new thread, keep going in this one

If I had to list all the things that are longer than my dick, it'd be a list of everything that's longer than 3.6 inches.

DOG?

>>677891168
Even thought i despise the fact they have a nigger qb

all i want is to slurpp other men thick cum like slurp the dog

I remember this one time when I was 6, I got a boner watching the velociraptors in Jurassic Park chasing that one bitch with the tucked in shirt through the ceiling. Something about her being so terrified aroused me.

Hey yo, op.
That nigha christian sounds like a bitch

You are like my fleshlight, I never wash it so I get a new one every few years.

>>677891359
>I wouldn't let you back there anyways

tbh shoulda broke up sooner.

SOILED IT

To be honest my dog's cock tastes much better than yours

>>677891754
Now that I think about it, that bitch's shirt stayed tucked in through that whole movie. Climbing over electrified fences, up and down trees, through mud, it endured. Unlike my erections.

Also, I always liked the way you kind of looked like an ape

Although we were not meant to be together, I did put in a janitor application for you, so you're one step closer to meeting the internet's most eligible bachelor, Mootykins.

I'm not high, this isn't even my final form

Oh by the way, niggers tongue my anus.

and i dont even have beat them

I'm going to kill myself now, any idea how to do it?

Listen you dumb hoe, I resent you because you never let me slip my big toe into your butthole.

I sure do love being a faggot all the time.

Also I'm drunk right now. I'll probably regret this tomorrow.

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Op here sorry for such slow responses

Arab women are the best... they're so energetic and explosive.

What im trying to say is that you fat and ugly and its over. Peace

Oh by the way. I saw you putting that shoe in your asshole last night.

PS - I want to fuck your grandpa so bad, it hurts. Like seriously, my balls are all tingly and itchy.

I should probably tell you that I gave you herpes last time. I like to call it Dante's Inferno. See you in the 7th Circle of Hell.

THE END

>>677885752

You and me? We're done.

BUT ALSO THE BEGINNING

I'M GOING TO SHOVE MY COCK UP YOUR CUNT OVER AND OVER AND THERE WILL BE NOTHING TO STOP ME, WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT.

I'm going to kill me by sticking my fleshlight in the electrical
socket

SORRY CAT WALKED ON KEYBOARD

I'm not drunk, I just needed help breaking up with you

oh and your cousin, the hot one, yeah we fucked. shit was SO cash, wish you were there. oh yeah, incest is another of my many, many fetishes.

>>677886259
Tbh I think breaking up through a screen is fine cause IRL they'll been to stay with you and may even cause a scene. Plus the whole point of breaking up is to not be together anymore.

I feel like I might be a transgender vigilante at heart, but I'm unsure.
I'm sure that I don't love you anymore though.

Chris is just going to lie to you, I'm literally stroking the rim of his navel with my tongue as I type

I'm a colossal cockgobbler, but this way better guy wants to meet you. His kik username is pelidc, and he can explain everything.

Long story short, we're breaking up. You can be my concubine if you want.

But for old times sake, can you send me a pic of peanut butter slathered on your puss?

Chris has a real tight ass and would be a better partner than you, you anal loving hoe.

The stars sure are beautiful tonight.

YOU IN YOUR CAR SMOKIN A GLASS OF BURGER WHEN YOUR BOY JAROD ROLL UP SAYIN HE GOTTA BUY SOME CHANGE FOR HIS DAUGHTER YOUR GIRL IN THE SHOWER AND HIS COUSIN COME IN WEARIN NOTHIN WHAT DAY OF THE WEEK IS IT

I NEED TO SPEND MORE TIME WITH MY ANAL BUDDIES

>>677885752
In accordance with Megan's law I must inform you that I am a convicted sex offender.

i'm sorry to say that your utter lack of knowledge regarding frozen incest hentai renders us incompatible, the only way i can get any stimulation now is by jamming my penis in the freezer, this has also coincidentally led me into necrophilia since they stay perpetually cold, we won't see each other for a while... unless an unfortunate accident occurs and you pass on.. in which case your prospects will have risen, goodbye.

>>677893444
KEK

I watched chris die after he choked on his own wiener spunk

Hitler did 9/11 with George Bush.

Let's do lunch sometime!

Thats IT, THATS IT! I'm going to END IT TONIGHT! I fuckin hate YOU as much as I hate Yu-gi-oh, and I can't live like this. I'm going to take my life and I'll bring your cat with me.

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Wanna watch Columbine part 2 tonight?

Op won't include this

Dont call me dante! Bitch, you only refer to me now as the Dark Lord Dankness Poopie Eyed Pete.

On all levels except physical, I am a wolf.

Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity, to seize everything you ever wanted, in one moment, would you capture it, or would you let it go?

FUCK ME IN THE ASS CUSS I LOVE JESUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK ME IN THE ASS BECAUSE I LOVE JJJJJJJJJJEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSSSS

>>677885752
i wanna make a threesome whit a tranny please say yes

>>677885752

Let me put it this way, you are an untrustworthy, lying, mrs. potato head looking carpet muncher. I ate a bowl of cottage cheese this morning and it reminded me of the time i tounge punched your sisters fart box. I still moan in ecstasy when i hear someone taking a shit

I'm building a wall and you're paying for it bitch Make Dante Great Again.

>>677893904
His palms are sweaty, knees weak arms are heavy

>>677885752

I wont tell you where I am. I'm ashamed of where I am right now. I'm fucking Dave. There, I told you. Dave has the goods to make my butt all wet and stuff. We do things that are magic. He's a magic man.

>>677894081
there's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti.

You have no style, you have no grace. You also have a funny face.

I have terrible terrible buttshits. I can't contain them all, so I just let it dry on my ass and peel it off as a thick gritty film. Ain't good for the hemhorroids...

>>677894152
I call him Magic Johnson because I caught AIDS from him. I passed on to you, btw.

Roses are nigger
Violets are jew
You're a cunt
Bush did 9/11

May I jerked it to your feets aftereally all this

>>677894296
They're the GOOD kind of AIDS though, so you might not die so horribly. If anything, I'll kill you before the virus ravages your nasty husk.

>>677894215
I hate white people, the entire fucking race. Especially you, I want to spray your eyes with mace.

Also make me some Chinese coffee

And you know what? How about YOU put the fucking toilet seat down once in a while, huh? Maybe the default setting for toilet seats is up, ever thought of that?

Send me pictures of tits

>>677894220

The fuck

I eat cereal with salsa

Im so sorry. Im in a bad place. I didnt me anything im soo sorry


Except for hateing nigegers and loving cock. Children are pretty hot tbh

This is my phone now bitch. Fuck Dante

Can you pop my ear zits

OH SHIT HE FOUND ME HELP

>>677894590
/thread

If you stop being a hysterical cunt I'll tell you where his body can be found

CINDI IM SORRY COME BACK TO ME

Also, I hate to ask, but will you buy me Star Wars on Blu-Ray?

i also remember the first time I saw The Fox and the Hound. It reminds me of you every time.

How much nog could a nig nog nig if a nig nog could nig nog?

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She is apparently coming over, posting now, if I die let it be known I was still a faggot

OP, give us an update.

I came in the spaghetti

Honestly you did look fat in that dress

>>677894871

Dude it wasn't that funny. Don't be samefagging this shit up you acoustic nigger

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>>677895036
Dude I am calling her friends

>>677885752
Show her this
http://www.streamboobs.com/lovemeboys11/

Do you happen to have any robux I'm starting to run dry

>>677895020
Lock the doors and smear red paint over the windows.

I dare you to come over. I DOUBLE DOG DARE YOU TO COME OVER.
Bring ya nasty dildo too. I'm going hog wild on that shit tonight.

Rawr XD

Cindi, I don't know what I'm doing. I've asked strangers on the internet to dump you for me because I'm a broken person. And maybe you are too, I don't know who's to blame anymore, but it doesn't matter. I just want to be a better person than I am right now, and I think I can't be that with you. Not because you bring me down, but because I've spent too much time treating you like shit, and I don't even know how to be what you need anymore. I'm so sorry.

>>677895311
boo

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Would you prefer that I just post like this in burst or space them out?

>>677895311
HELP SOMEONE IS FORCING ME TO DO THIS CALL 911 I DONT WANT TO DIE

>>677895431
I prefer the burst, funnier that way

>>677895431

However you want OP. Don't stop!

It's all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits. By that I mean me

ALRIGHT THEYRE KEEPING ME HOSTAGE RUN WHILE YOU CAN

>>677895431
bursts. we need updates to the moment of your demise.

I like it when niggos tongue-punch my fartbox.

I'm joking Cindi. All of this is a joke. I wanted to do an April Fool's prank but I'm a little late. So it's a regular prank. I actually love you. I love everything about you except that stupid fucking i at the end of your name. It's Cindy with a y, not with an i. Your parents are both autistic and I wish they would've done something better, you should've been called Frank, it reminds me of my uncle. The one who molested me at a young age. I never told you because I thought you'd judge me. April Fool's baby, I love you.

I'm wearing a suicide vest. Don't come over.

keep posting the updates!

It's called coprophilia, you uneducated degenerate. May I educate you in the many fetishes I have indulged in?

>>677895431
>featuring Dante from the Devil May Cry series

Hey, sorry, but you are ugly. Like Sloth or Mama Fertelli from The Goonies ugly. Fuck, come to think of it, I'd rather hump that dirty old Mama Fertelli butthole than your vag on a good day. Skank.

>>677885752

There's four masked men with guns and if you come inside they'll kill you. If the cops come i
m dead too.

I'm also a massive faggot who likes to shove subway sandwhiches us his has while moaning jared fogles name

nonetheless, my scrotum is really sore from all the lice, as well as from the lies

You know what my favorite part is about shoving 9 raw oysters up your grandmother's snatch? Sucking out 11.

hey but don't call 911 you'll look like a dumb hoe

dont come cindi over call 911 NOW. i dont know how much more i can get in while hes not watching.

You dumb bitch dont you understand? all I want is a nice big fat black cock stuck up my asshole fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

I'd be willing to suck a black man's balls while he fucks you.

a e s t h e t i c

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I CAN FUCK THE BUNNY

Baby I'm drunk and horny, please come over. You know how to give me the succ like no one else.

I'm taking your asshole for my trophy wall as soon as you step foot in my apartment.

I'm not drunk. It's called pcp and I'm a fucking GOD

It's not you, it's me.

GOOOO LITTL TADPOL. FIND UR WAI BAK HOME

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

сука вlуат

i fucking love it when i imagine you getting fucked by big black cock.

I herd you liek mudkips

You want to know why my life is fucked up Cindi? I have been raped 5 times, all by male relatives. I've been molested by MY OWN DAD since I was three. I am beaten regularly by both my parents. You think you understand me? Your pain isn't even close to what I feel. Fuck you. Fuck life. I'm ending it tonight.

if you enter my apartment you will be shot please dont cindi I beg you not to

Please, do it for papa John

Baby I'm so sorry. I'm just going to kill myself. If you call the cops I'll kill every single one of them.

III LLLLOOOOVVVEE YOOUU JJEEESSUUUSSS CCHRRIIIIISSSSTTT

Okay seriously, my name is Sean and I found Bryan's cellphone at Burger King. Wanna hang out?

I might take you back if you get Trump to cum in my butthole

www.meatspin.com

hey here's a cool link i found: lastmeasure.zoy.org
do it for me bby

Look It's over, your used up cunt no longer provides me with the pleasure that taking my dogs giant knot up my ass provides. Just something about letting my dog mount me and ram his 9inch dick inside of me drives me crazy. Bye Felicia

>>677896874
right round spin me right round

wew lad

Now this is a story all about how my girlfriend Cindi is freaking out and I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there. I'll tell you why a bunch of fags are giving you a scare.

OP, whats the progress? Is she coming over?

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing. 2 He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, 3 he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. 4 Even though I walk through the darkest valley,I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. 5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. 6 Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORDforever.

>>677897169
This

I regret to inform you that after careful consideration, it has been decided that your position as girlfriend is being revoked. If you would like to remain within this organization, a position for booty call is open.

that's why I wanna be under Barack Obama

Cindi are you a nigger?

for those wondering about the name, black dad

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead

Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb

So much to do, so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets?
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

Hey, now, you're an All Star, get your game on, go play
Hey, now, you're a Rock Star, get the show on, get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold

It's a cool place and they say it gets colder
You're bundled up now wait 'til you get older
But the meteor men beg to differ
Judging by the hole in the satellite picture

The ice we skate is getting pretty thin
The water's getting warm so you might as well swim
My world's on fire. How about yours?
That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored.

Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas
I need to get myself away from this place
I said yep, what a concept
I could use a little fuel myself
And we could all use a little change

Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb

So much to do so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold

I;m thinkin bout thos beans

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead

Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb

So much to do, so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets?
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

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Dads black so its not that edgy of a name

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IT APPEARS YoU HAVE FAILED TO COMPREHEND A METICULOUSLY DESIGNED TRAP IN WHICH THE CHEESE OF FALSEHOOD HAS BEEN PROJECTED FROM A DEVICE OF MY OWN CONCEPTION THEN DEACTIVATED UPON PROXIMITY BY YOU, THE NOW TRAPPED RATFINK, TO BE SEEN AND RIDICULED FOR MY ENTERTAINMENT

Its funny, you'd think poop would taste really bad, but after tonight, I've learned something about poop, the taste, and myself.

>>677897104
In 4chan.org born and raised on /b/ was where I spent most of my days chillin out delivering cuz OP is cool and shootin some niggers right after school

Reality is not real, but rather an abstract concept, which is but an ethereal existence which is but an illusion.

The op die?

>>677895431
Next reply to her: Bitch! I'm not drunk! I'm a motherfucking AIDS wizard!

CAROLINE WOULD YOU LIKE TO MARRY ME ??

rule34.paheal.net

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Posting these not as they come but in batch

>>677897571
When a couple of fags, they were up to no good. Started shitposting in my neighbourhood. I got in one little thread and my mom got scared she said "You're moving with your Aunty and Uncle on Reddit."

Lets have a baby? They kinda give me a chub.

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keep them coming, im fucked may as well have fun

>>677897517
What happened that last time you drank?

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AND I'm PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN WHERE AT LEAST I KNOW IM FREE

herpes

I've been up 2 days smoking glassssssssss

>>677898027
This

Cindi, this ISNT A JOKE! HELP!
Bring chips when ya dumb ass comes over. I'm here, waiting. Me and Isaac are naked and wet and waiting and a little drunk.

>>677897928
Roll

You've heard of buttchugging? I've been buttsmoking. I jammed a bong up my ass and inhaled.

>>677897999
At least you got trips

And I think to myself, what a wonderful world

You'll coward won't even smoke crack

>>677898446
1 IN THE PINK 1 IN THE STINK

>>677893022
>>677895311
Pussed out on these, eh, OP?

EHG did nothing wrong

Are you familiar with the term, creampie?
I JUST GAVE ONE TO ISAAC HAHAHA!
He's cool with it too.

I'm going to order so many pizzas to this house CINDI

>>677885752

Oh Cindi cum in my ass and call me Obama

You have a sister right? I would love to have a threeway with your sister and your cat

>>677898027
puke everywhere, then driving