I would much rather die a angry yet honest representation of myself than be an old man cowering afraid in a bed praying to some god that I know does not exist.

>>676163774
Don't be such a fucking pussy
>I can't think of a quick effective way to commit suicide.
Get fucking drunk and jump of a bridge or in front of a train.

I don't really want to drown and theres no trains here. I was honestly just gonna get a can of gas and self immolate or something like...I dont know...I might as well die a badass.

Ultimately I don't want to die I want to sit and just smoke cannabis until I die but I have to consider whether or not I give any shit about the meaning of my life and the representation people will perceive of me after I'm gone or whether or not I intend to survive simply for hedonistic reasons. In a sense its selfish to live.

Even if I live I mean...I don't know entirely what I mean by this but...Even if I live to be elderly I would simply just be a elderly living dead person. Even if I live...I have died today...life is just....FUCKED.

>>676163774
OP, you still here? What's the problem?

I don't know. I hit that stage of calmness where your mind gets flooded with endorphins and I'm just...thinking...

>>676166411
Do you have a career or only hobbies to take your attention away from these feelings or is it that bad that it doesn't help much?

I assumed you were being a dick and asking that like "whats the problem why haven't you killed yourself yet" btw I don't know if you meant like legitly whats the problem.

Smoking cannabis all day every fucking day helps.

>>676166662
Actually, I am legitimately asking what is the problem? Has it been a series of events or one big cause you can peg it to?

>>676166713
Are you joking or really toking?

>>676166662
I feel that I have some people that don't give a crap about me for one reason or another and are asking that of me too.

Well a million things are problems and I've had a million problems as a result but currently the issue just happens to be that I am the spawn of an evil person. Thats really the only way I can put this. Its not just like mommy/daddy issues either. Its not like I was ever physically abused also its just...I dont fucking know. Also I'm not joking I love weed I live for weed if there is one thing on this planet I live for its my next hit of cannabis.

This person is a manipulative hurtful person that has never in their life admitted wrongdoing and consistently believes they are better than others even though everyone around them knows that they are a judgemental, hurtful, shitty person.

>>676167377
This is not one of your parents? Is it someone that's alive right now? A relative? Someone from school or work? Someone else?

>>676163774
Tanner?

>>676167873
What Tanner?

I am talking about a parent. A parent that will harass me and emotionally torture me, manipulate my life, and then hand me off to a psychiatric system that literally only seems to give me meds that I have adverse reactions to, to the point it is physical torture I would rather die than experience.

I have spent more time tortured in mental units screaming in pain than some murderers go to prison for.

>>676168018
Which one? And why don't you reply to posts directly?

Have you tried overeating jellybeans? I have a good supply if you need them.

please seek help, man. you are a very weak boy and you are sick in the head

Help doesn't exist and anyone that ever said they got help from taking a badly thought out medication from a person who studied in a conceptually flawed field or said that got help from a hour a month talking to some moronic shithead that only tells you to get some coping skills or some shit is a fucking liar.

When life is a prison and the warden decides to torture you, you hang yourself...its just what you fucking do. You don't go to the counselor when your life means jack shit and you enjoy jack shit and talk about your fucking day.

>>676168751
No matter who you know or can call?

I have very few friends and all they would say is shit I've already heard from them a billion times before. At the end of the day nothing they do will change the things that are wrong in my life.

>>676169451
What's left to do for you, then, at this point? Go for broke? Everything or nothing?

I don't know...I think I'm just going to get pass out drunk instead...Kind of makes me wonder exactly how many lives are saved by alcohol on daily basis vs how many it kills.

I don't have the rage in me for self immolation anymore. It'd be odd to burn myself alive in this mental state.

>>676170141
You a virgin?

Yea and honestly I probably always will be and I've accepted it at this point.

Women in the end inevitably turn out to be shitty fucking people.

Besides it'd be a bad idea on the off chance I'd have a kid. Lets just say the men in my family line have a rich tradition of killing ourselves.

>>676163774
I heard ISIS is looking for your kind of people.

Then you can let the government drop a bomb on you so my shares on Lockheed martin go up.

Idk try xtc helped a lot of people that i know, just be save with it.. But could change your attitude and might give you some positive feels again tho i dont rlly think self-medication is the way to go

>>676172459
Why would you say that?
>>676171412
And this?

Every woman I've ever known, when giving enough time, turn into heartless evil and idiotic creatures. As for the other part I say that because male suicide in my family line happened like...A fucking shitload from what I hear.

Well solving problems can be weird but a path out could be drugs and then AA meetings , just sit in traffic and feel the vibe, yea it sucks but your in the same position as everyone else, and your not alone

>>676173466
How would you know? That's the same crap OP was talking about here >>676169451

btw lol @ the guy that mentioned ISIS btw. Plz ISIS kill trump and we won't hate you anymore.

>>676173983
Well that's my 2c , if your Gona be a dick then fuck you, you might as well off yourself if you talk to people that might care about you like that, even if it's just in the slightest

>>676175140
Fuck you too

>>676163774
Has OP left?

I'm still here but I have no clue why I haven't deleted this post yet and gone to bed.

>>676176840
Where in the world are you? Isn't it still Sunday or are you that down on your life?

>>676175140
"Might care"? Too much manipulation going on to take that bs.

>>676163774
Take out a bunch of mudslimes then sudoku

Be useful for once

>>676163774
Killing yourself is ridiculously easy. If you actually wanted to you would have done it by now.

Jump off a high bridge. Throw yourself infront of a train.

Shit or get off the pot son.

Theres no bridge high enough around here. Theres no fucking trains I already said that like theres regular cargo trains but who the fuck stands around for 6 hours waiting for a fucking train to show the fuck up. Besides I already said I calmed the fuck down and got drunk.

Where do you live?

Committing suicide is a ridiculously difficult endeavor why do you think people constantly fail unless they own a gun. Theres not many methods that don't take ages and fucking ages and they certainly arent comfortable.

Think about it. One of the better methods is slitting your wrists and thats gotta take fucking hours and by the time you manage it you have to sit there bleeding out puking like a bitch until your heart spasms and you die. Not exactly ideal.

Cars aren't made like they used to either...so much for just taking a nap and never waking up rite.

>>676178972
Tell me more

Somewhere between "They Call it Anon for a Reason Avenue" and "Why The Fuck Are You Asking Me Boulevard".