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Poop

Masterbate

Not realize, try to pee standing up, piss all over the floor

See my new dick

>>675842740
Step One:
Cry. Fuck being a woman, I never want to be a woman. Menstrual cramps, tampons, being a slave to the fashion industry or risking social exile, not getting common respect due to the rest of women giving even cool ones a bad name, etc.

Step Two:
Become the woman I've always wanted. Become the most honorable, respectable, self-respecting, badass, attractive-yet-not-tryhard-attractive, intelligent, interesting, funny woman I can be.

Step Three:
Take advantage of society's tendency to coddle women and always give them benefit of the doubt. Abuse these privileges until society starts to notice. Use this as an example to point out the inequalities in society that favor women. Get taken seriously because as a woman, you can't just be handwaved away with the usual "Well you're not a woman so how would you even know?" Make other women look like stupid shit, make myself look like a brilliant badass. Use logic instead of emotions to make an argument and dictate my actions.

Step Four:
Squeeze my tits and masturbate for days. Become lesbian.

Get a pap smear

probably see what its like to have something inside my vagina, cause then i'd know if men or women have a better feeling in sex/masturbation/molestation

Dildos all day erry day.

>>675843115
Exactly

I'd take a shitload of photos and then masturbate while watching them.

>>675842740
Its different sex you moron.

Cry rape

Realize that gender is just a social construct and that I could easily switch back.

Fuck a melon

>>675842740
Masturbate on video, then masturbate to the video

>>675845155
lrn2biology

>>675845163
Would procreate with.

I'd stick all things in my vag and find all the ways to masturbate to. Then I'd go lez around and film it.

Then I'd masturbate to that. Easy.

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>>675842740
I'd make a thread in /b/ asking other anons what they'd do if woke up tomorrow as the opposite gender.

Fondle my boobs, then go to /b/ and command them as my army for boobshots and pussypics

>>675845431
I'd have so many multiple earth shattering orgasms holy shit.

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>>675844781
> molestation

>>675842740
I would look if my dick is big.

>>675845155
You're fucking stupid. It's nature dumb fuck.

>>675842740
kill myself

Immediately create a ring of neckbeard fools who will do anything for affection, and just use those benefits, or just stream on twitch and rake in 5k a night.

Anal until my guts fell out

>>675844781
>thinking the vagina is the primary erogenous zone
It's like just stroking the cock shaft near the base. Feels pretty good, but takes a lot of work to cum, if you can cum from that at all. But you can't do shit with a dry vagina. It needs to get wet first before anything goes inside, otherwise friction = pain.

The clit is more like basically the cock head and area just under the cock head. The thing is, it's really small, and usually hidden inside or within a bunch of folds, so it's approximately as sensitive as a cock head, but much harder to get at and stimulate. When girls masturbate, insertion is for fun and puts a little pressure on the base of the clit, but playing with the clit itself is for when they want to cum.

So basically, from a guy's perspective, if you got turned into a woman, having a vagina would be like having a really really tiny cock, balls that are inside you but still manage to hurt once a month, and a second urethra that feels pretty good to put things inside.

>>675845563
>Implying women have dicks

blame the patriarchy

Take a piss

buy a lot of cute clothes

>>675845742
Well you can do that already

Hopefully I'd be a hot woman. Then I'd whore myself out. Bang my way through college. Bang my way to the top of the ladder. Bang the ladder. Cry about everything. Pretend like my opinion matters. Yup. Life would be way better

>>675845763
>So basically, from a guy's perspective, if you got turned into a woman, having a vagina would be like having a really really tiny cock, balls that are inside you but still manage to hurt once a month, and a second urethra that feels pretty good to put things inside.

What about the superior orgasms and stuff. I'm always so envious when my gf cums with shivers and all. For us guys it's more like splurge and that's that.

>>675842740
Say "OH SHIT" and roll with it i guess

>>675842740
Pleasure myself with a zucchini

>>675845763
>can only can cum from clit stimulation
Vaginal orgasms are way better.
Some people just cant have them though.
I'm sorry

make myself some coffee

>>675845947
>Bang the ladder
Kek.

>>675845763
Very descriptive, you a girl?

Get Arby's.

>>675845763
Err... to be honest, it varies a lot from girl to girl. Yeah, what you said is what pop culture SAYS is the case, but isn't necessarily the case. For instance: current girl I'm with goes APESHIT over penetration. She cannot orgasm without it. First time I went down on her, she was like, "wat". And I normally elicit incredible reactions from women with my mouth (turns out she greatly preferred sucking to licking, though always ends up having me stop so I can stick it in her). Had another girl that could cum pretty quickly from either.

TL;DR - Women's bodies are all RNG'd and you just gotta hope you don't need to engage in hour-long Cthonic rituals to get them to climax.

Have a panic attack.

>>675842740
>> Take my boobs with timestamp
>> post on /b
>> ask for attention

>>675846394
I am a trans and therefore i know how both having a penis and a vagine feel ;)

>>675844596

written by a woman/trap/faggot/whiteknight

no real fucking man could ever write such a horror story.

>>675842740
Call in sick.

>>675845779
Or if she wanted to be a he

>>675842740
I can change my gender whenever I like
>checkmate

I'd try to pee standing up

>>675842740
Get fucked by a bbc and cuck a white/b/oi.

>>675846598
That's convenient

>>675845856
this ^

complain about oppress

Become a lesbian

I would pee while standing up :^)

and then I think I would rape someone

>>675842740
Screw my gf in a good way.

become gay

Make a shit load of money cam whoring

>>675842740
look at myself in the mirror
then do whatever the female equivalent of fapping is
then probably kill myself

>>675842740
Masturbate, then get a sex change.

>>675847288
heil; it is fucking hard

>>675846600
>inequalities that favor women.
You obviously can't read.

>>675845779
But i'm female.

>>675847672
would you be so kind to show us your tits with timestamp if not, get the fuck off

>>675845742
wat?

>>675846066
Haha the female orgasm isn't magical. Guys don't usually get the "shivers" because we jerk off and cum so fucking much that orgasms are just second nature to us. We usually just fight through the shivery feeling when we get them, whereas women indulge more and let their shivers out through their whole body. Try not jerking off for a couple days, then go nuts. You'll feel the shivers.

And the multiple orgasm thing isn't so great either. You know when you're edging yourself, but you get too close to the edge, and even though you clench, you're on the verge of a full-on orgasm, some actual cum drips out, you get a little bit softer, then you calm down, get hard again and keep going? It's like that. When a woman has a full-on solid orgasm, she usually only needs one and is too sensitive afterward, much like when you fap really hard, cum really hard, and your cock feels raw for a while. If she has a weaker orgasm, she'll probably want more.

>>675846286
Yeah, it's like I said, it's similar to just stroking the base of the cock shaft. Feels pretty good, if not a better orgasm due to indirect stimulation causing a teasing effect, but some guys are too insensitive to cum from that alone.

>>675846394
No, but honesty and openness are essential parts of a relationship for me, and I've dated lots of girls, and I always get into the details of sex and sexuality with them. (usually putting theories to the test as well, since live experimentation proves better results and is much more fun).

>>675846440
This is true. It also depends heavily on psychological stimulation (some guys prefer to cum from sounding because of the physical, but moreso psychological stimulation), as well as clit location. Some clits are much more internal, and it's easier to stimulate them from beneath, through pressure inside the vagina.

>>675847884
I'm not getting out and there's nothing you can do about it.

Blow a few guys

>>675847884
fuck off, man

>>675842740
Start a blog about feminism

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>>675847957
you shure about that sarah k ?

>>675847930
If your analogy is true then in some males just stroking the base of the cock shaft would lead to way better orgasms

>>675847930
>And the multiple orgasm thing isn't so great either. You know when you're edging yourself, but you get too close to the edge, and even though you clench, you're on the verge of a full-on orgasm, some actual cum drips out, you get a little bit softer, then you calm down, get hard again and keep going? It's like that. When a woman has a full-on solid orgasm, she usually only needs one and is too sensitive afterward, much like when you fap really hard, cum really hard, and your cock feels raw for a while. If she has a weaker orgasm, she'll probably want more.


nope, just nope

Get raped and killed by some neckbeard on Craigslist looking for a rape fantasy victim.

>>675848822
And that's completely true.

Depends how sensitive your cock is though, and whether you're natural or cut. Natural cocks are more sensitive, and the slightly looser skin allows for more sliding when you stroke the shaft. If you're uncut, give it a try. Just keep looking at your favorite porn and steadily stroking the shaft alone. The orgasm feels really good, and your cock head won't be as raw/sensitive afterward. You might even be able to go again.

>>675849085
Unless you provide evidence to the contrary, I'll just assume you're one of those guys who believes in porno fantasies and thinks "squirting" isn't just piss.

>>675842740
get out of bed.

Become the next female hitler

>>675848036
What are ya fucking gay?

>>675847899
Its a lot easier and more socially exceptable for women to get anal. I'd probably forget my vagina and jest get buttfucked day and night.

>>675842740

do as much lesbian stuff as possible

>>675849330
>Unless you provide evidence to the contrary
Prove that I have multiple (full and satisfying) orgasms?

Lol no.

>>675849899
Then the least you could do is explain the sensations and experience to us uneducated masses.

The worst that could happen is more guys will learn how to give girls multiple orgasms.

>>675849763
no pregnancy bonus as well!

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i would watch this movie with my

girlfriend

>>675845068
fuck off back to tumblr. fag

>>675850220
>implying all female sexual experiences/orgasms are the same

not going to type all of that shit out anyway

>>675842740

quad fart.
then go to piss. without washing hands.
then enter the kitchen asking "yo, coffee", and fart.
then turn on TV, while farting again, and say "WTF WTF WTF" with no apparent reason.

>>675850590
stop raping me!

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>>675849627

Who was the first female hitler?

>>675850668
I'll fucking rape your butthole until it falls off

>>675843115
/thread

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>>675850874

>>675850836
Hillary Clinton