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I wanna have sex... What do I do?
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Thread replies: 52
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I wanna have sex... What do I do?
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>>675073168
Go have sex.
>>
PUT THE PEEN IN THE PUSSI
>>
What if I have no one to have sex with ?
>>
>>675073319
go find someone shitstick
>>
>>675073168
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-CPijjFWhw
>>
>>675073389
But I can't go out because my mom doesn't let me. It's past bed time anyway
>>
>>675073319
Pay to someone
Or you can barely a man and get a woman from the bar/club
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I don't wanna jerk off :(
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>>675073168
>>
>>675073481
wtf age?
>>
>>675073256
Let me rephrase this to something you all might understand. PUT RARE PEPE IN VAGOO AND RAGU ALL OVER THE MOMS SPAGETTI FALLING OUT OF YOUR POCKETS.
>>
>>675073168
Go fuck yourself.
>>
>>675073168
Go to a club at night and wait outside until very dark. Wait until a drunk girl starts walking alone, then follow her home. Once she is home break into her house and rape her. You might go to jail but at least you got pussy.
>>
>>675073168
get yourself a sexdoll man.
>>
>>675073168
pay
>>
>>675073168
you are currently wanting to have sex
>>
>>675073168
Ok, anon, I'm here for you.

This is what you need to do:
Get a Sunda flying lemur. They are a bit hard to come by, but if you really want to acomplish something in your life, this shouldn't stop you. Once you got the guy, (it has to be male, otherwise it won't work) get him to smoke. Those little guys can get addicted to nicotine just like us, so if you get him to smoke, he will be really into it. Now, once that is acomplished, walk around with him on your shoulder everywhere. When women see it, they will become curious and ask:
- What's that?

And then you can tell them it is a Sunda flying lemur. This will then inevitably lead to the question:
- Does it fly?

To which you calmly answer, no it doesn't. To which they will ask:
- What does it do then?

And this is the moment you prepared for. You confidently look the bitch in the eye and say "I'll show you.", then give a lighter and a cigarette to the little guy, and show her how he smokes.

After this, the bitch will be ready to give it to you, and you will be drowning in pussy for the rest of your life.

You're welcome.
>>
>>675073168
This is really a question that your parents should be answering, but I guess I can give some pointers. I assume that you must be gay:
1.put your penis into an asshole
2.withdraw your penis, but not so that it fully exits the asshole that you have chosen in step 1.
3. repeat from step 1.
>>
>>675075099
^^Listen to this guy^^^ very few people are aware of the Sunda flying lemur technique and even fewer share the knowledge. In my opinion your first sexual encounter should be giving this guy a blow-job to say thank-you. Post your email and credit card details and he will be in contact.
>>
>>675073168

ask your mom
>>
>>675073168
Buy one of these
>>
Tinder
>>
>>675078850
>>
>>675079392
more?
>>
>>675078850
What is that and where can I get one?
>>
>>675079659
You got a spare $1000 to spend on a fake ass?
>>
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>>675079709
Is that how much it is?
>>
>>675074625
Where can I get one of these?
>not OP
>>
>>675079926
http://www.seductivemidnightcandyshop.com/life-sized-masturbator-toy/
>>
>>675074625
where can I get one?
>>
>>675079709
Yeah, inheritance money.
>>
Find a "escort" fam
spoilers: they're hookers
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNoG8JEpnUE


this is a tutorial on how sex
>>
>>675079926

that's more funny than hot..........LOL
>>
>>675079941
>>675080083
pretty sure thats a ball jointed doll that some perv modified into a sex doll.

If you want one like this your gonna have to modify a bjd yourself.
>>
>>675073319
>money can buy you love
>>
>>675073168
Never get married, go on dating websites and have sex with old divorced men.
>>
>>675073168
got a dog? neighbors dog will work too.
>>
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Sup. Meet Javiela, my fucking bitch of an ex. She fucks some nigger while her friends watched and I figured it all out. She liked to get in the ass and she has a really nice pussy. It's payback time. Here's some fuck videos we have http://s000.tinyupload.com/index.php?file_id=55968452456882190753 enjoy /b/ 27
>>
>>675080353
It's not, see >>675080050

It's just a lump of silicone
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>>675073168
stick your dick into a vagina or pooper OP, this has always worked for me!
>>
>>675080534
The question remains
>where can I buy one?
>>
>>675080732
Are you fucking blind?
>>
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>Sign up for dating/meeting website
>list that you're looking for sex and not a relationship
>post real pictures of yourself and contact others who are in the same position as yourself (looking for casual sex)
>Use your best judgement on std/sti's
>have sex
If you fat start working out.
If you ugly dress nice and take care of yourself.
If you're socially retarded practice in a mirror every day and go out and try it in your everyday life.
I know, If may seem hard or "Just not that easy" but it really is.
>>
>>
>>675080050
>financing available
kek
>>
>>675080534
you retard... they were asking about the little fuck doll in the pink dress not the water filled ass.
>>
>>675081104
>dat hair

I didn't know wolfmen needed sex toys
>>
>>675080833
No, nobody provided a credible link to a site where I can buy one of the dolls, only the overpriced ass
>>
>>675081258
clearly he is a hairy ugly fat fuck virgin cant get none.
>>
>>675081355
>>675079941
>>675080083

Surprisingly reverse image search brings up the manufacturers website. Looks like she is out of production.

http://www.doll-zone.com/pro_detail.asp?id=208
Thread replies: 52
Thread images: 11

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