>>675004038

>25 yo
>Asperger syndrome
>All alone

Haven't bitched about being single for almost a year now, kinda shrugged and moved on for the sake of self-improvement, whatever that seems to entail.
Tired of seeing sleazy people hook up while I extinguish the compulsion to cringe and laugh when they crumple in a month or so.
About it, just crave loyal companionship to ease the suffering I endure daily as the cost of living.

>>675004038
good night pizza

>>675004398
19
hfa
have never touched a girl sensually in my life..and that's all I want :'c

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>>675004038
I just don't get it. I don't have any bad things going on in my life and I'm not depressed. I have a pretty decent life, but I don't know why I keep on coming to these threads. It's not for me to laugh at the situations. I just don't know why...

>>675006131
It's underwhelming once you recognize that most of your feelings and thoughts about said person are bunk.

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>18
>In a wheelchair
>not ugly but no luck with girls
>small group of friends
>constantly dream about having a happy life where I'm not crippled and have a girlfriend
>I wake up and wonder why I go on

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>>675004038
Sure, I'm 19 and still a virgin.

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>>675004038
i miss my aunt.
she'd come over sometimes while her boyfriend was away after school.

once the door would close she'd almost instantly get naked. most times she'd put on her favorite song and start sucking. then she would cry. her tears and makeup would drip down her face onto my dick. its surprising how cold tears are. eventually i finally asked her what was wrong. in between licks she told me that her favorite song was also her bfs favorite song. so even though she loved hearing it and it totally got her pussy wet, it also made her think about the fact that she was cheating on her boyfriend. i dont think i ever came harder down somebodies throat then right after she told me that. she was beautiful. we dont hang out anymore. wanna get lunch?


this was the song:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2tgwFpMA61c

>>675007198
If female:
> get blades/prosthetics
> become fastest thing on no legs

If male:
> get good with comedy/jokes
> go for the actual nice chicks

>>675005854
This just makes me sad. I pray for that Anon and hope he makes it thru all that bullshit he has to go thru.

I'm still in love with the same person after 8 years. I'm fucking terrified since he said to me he loves me back. He's getting married next year and i'm in a relationship too.
But you know, he's that kind of person you think about when you're alone ? That person you know that even when you will be fucking 80 years old, you know you will always still be fucking in love with.
I'm fucking scared but I don't know what to do. We can't be together, and I'm afraid to hurt him. We stayed friends since the beginning, he's the most amazing guy in this fucking planet and I can't stop thinking about him every day, for years.
We share the most beautiful and purest love of our lives and we can't be together..
Yes, Femanon here, and fuck you /b/, I won't show you anything, I just wanted to get this out off my chest.

https://youtu.be/OizafYTbprg

>>675008004
I'm not legless, I'm a paraplegic

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last greentext

>>675007198
Dude. Offer your body to science. You may get early access to medical tech and the risk is fairly low. At least you'll be able to see hope in the making right?

>>675004511
holy shit he sounds like such a faggot

>>675008311
I had a friend that was going through the same thing. He was in a relationship, she was engaged to her boyfriend of 6 years. They both dropped what they had before and are together now. I hope you and him find away to be together and are happy

All my life I have taken care of other people no matter how hard I had it. I've seen people change, get better, get worse, leave, people not making it. Hell I once held someone while he was dying. And I always was able to somehow make it and keep on helping people. But right now I can't. I can't feel, I can't cry. I have lost everyone I cared about. One after another they either killed themselves or just never showed up again which is the same I guess. But the last person left, the one I've been looking after for nearly 6 years is slowly loosing it. Not the kind of shit it's been a rough week. No, he is loosing it like in shit it's been a shitty fucking life. And I am unable to do shit about it. I might have a few weeks, months, maybe if I'm lucky a year or two but I know that at some point he will end it and I won't be able to do anything about it. He is pretty much the last thing left that keeps me from killing myself right now. He is my Soulmate, I have never before and will never again find someone like him. If there is one person on earth that completes you he is my counterpart. I just needed to write this down somewhere because I can't deal with it anymore. So you beautiful faggots make me feel again.

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>2 month ago
>playing cs by myself since none of my friends play
>meet this passive aggressive faggot
>"im throwing you guys are bad im global fuck you"
>only talks in text chat
fast forward 2 days
>meet him again in another game
>turns out its a her
>this time shes qued as a 4 man and im the odd one in the team
>turns out she isn't a faggot and we both like anime and counter strike
>add her
>play and talk to her for the next week
>turns out she was extremely suicidal, 28 year old NEET who quit her job and already tried to kill herself once
>just got out of a mental facility
>very depressed and turns out the only reason she is playing cs is keep her mind off of her not having a job
>despite this I still try and support her
>eventually grow somewhat attached after 2 weeks because i'm a beta loser who viewed her as my dream girl
>everything is going well I'm one of the only people she talks to on a daily basis
>feel like she isn't suicidal anymore
>all of the sudden she stops getting online
>1 week passes
>while shes offline i message her "where have u been????"
>go to class the next day
>come back home and find a message from her
>"I'm dead and i'm going to stay dead!"
>last online 24 days ago

>>675005628
this fucked me up

>>675008633
I assumed you were a male as 99% of /b/ is so the if female part was a reference but if you are a female then use the if male advice. It works eventually.

Last year I was told I have terminal mouth cancer, and now I only have a couple of months to live. I'm so scared bros, I'm so scared of what happens after we go. I'm so scared of not living, that I see all these terminal people doing amazing things with their last days but I'm so sick all I can do is stay home and browse /b/. I don't want to die, and I feel like a coward for not being brave.

>>675008633
If you're not lying, how can you honestly go on? I don't think I could go on with just losing a finger, much less not being able to use the lower half of my body

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If love is a war then I've been abandoned by my comrades, stabbed, beaten, and mutilated by friend and foe alike. And don't even have the strength left to take my cyanide tablets.

This has been the saddest feels thread (picture wise) that i've seen in a while. Maybe it's just because I'm more down than normal tonight.
Everything seems to be hitting so hard.

>>675011603
It's normal to be scared. I feel so sorry for you. Do you have any friends or family to help you ?

>>675011603
As long as you post here you will never be forgotten. At least not by me. And most people don't do shit when they hear that they have any terminal condition. You don't have to go out and try to make something "worthwhile", as long as you feel any better by doing what you're doing it's perfectly fine. I'm only sorry that I can't help you with your fear of death but no matter what happens I will remember you. And let me tell you I am fucking scared of death. When I start to think about it I just can't stop, I can't sleep, eat, drink, think of other things. It completely destroys me. I wish you the best and that you may find peace. Farewell /b/ro

>>675008138

Just remember that this guy died because you Americans refuse to fight for health care for all.

>>675011603
Well anon, unless you are a man of faith. Don't be scared of death. It's just how it was before you were born.

>>675013110
Nothing

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>>675012415
I know that feel. This thread is completely wrecking my feelings.

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>>675005628

You guys are amazing who knew a thread could make a person this emotional. I love all of you and all of the stuff you're going through/been through. Stay strong my friends.

Thanks /b/ros this was a nice thread.

Night

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>be a little kid
> parents used to leave me with dad's parents
> thought it was boring becuase no tv
> mostly ran around in the yard doing stupid shit with sister
> still loved grandparents though, they took us to parks and shit
> i dont have many friends in school and one day granda asks me "anon do you want to learn about gardening?"
>never really relised but his garden was AMAZING, wallflowers, roses, every colour fucking awesome in the summer.
> i agree, spend spring and summer tending to garden, cutting grass, planting etc
cont in next post

>>675009460
Thanks Anon. I still have hopes but I'm scared of hoping too much too long..
And we agreed to go on in our regular relationships without beeing hurt by those feelings, but I lied because I didn't him to stop our little game to talk to each other every night in secret. When I talk to him I can forget everything else. I can be myself and I'm afraid of nothing.. Then we go back to our lives and I feel empty. I love my current boyfriend, he's great but I will never be able to love him this much.
What I am doing with my life.. Dammit.

>>675012867
I don't really have any friends anymore. They said theyd have my back when this started, but then I had much of my teeth/gum/bone removed and I couldn't talk anymore. I got depressed and didn't go outside anymore, and they didn't bother to visit. I have family, and I almost feel too close to them. I don't want to burden them with my healthcare and funeral costs
>>675012937
>>675013110
Thanks /b/ros. I am not religious, but I don't want it to be painful.

>>675014548
Don't lose hope. Never let go of it. Sometimes it's the only thing that we got left.

>>675008004
>fastest thing on no legs
Reference game on point

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>>675014214
> years pass
>kind of drift away from doing garden work when i end up going to uni
>my granma is being put in a home for alzheimers
> a year later grandpa catches pneumonia
>he lives for 3 MOTHS longer than doctors said he would.
>last time i see him and hes really skinny but we just have a normal convo
> "how's school anon?" etc, its obvious its hard for him to breathe.
>ask him about garden, he looks out the window at his wallflowers and says he cant take care of his garden anymore he's obviously pretty devastated about it.
> 2 weeks later get told he's dead at uni
>manage not to cry at his funeral
>he left his home to my dad, i offer to garden it.
mfw wallflowers bloom for the first time since he died.

>>675014752
I feel even more sorry now knowing that you are alone in this situation. Would hug you if I could /b/ro.

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>>675007978

>>675014752
Nah anon, i can't promise it won't be painless. But the idea of no afterlife and just emptiness just appeals to me more. That way I won't be stuck with this shit life forever regretting everything.

>>675014752
I'm sorry to hear that your friend left you. But I hope I can somewhat calm you down when I tell you that when the time comes around you'll get really strong pain killers. It won't be painful. I really only wish I could do more for you..

>>675014548
Maybe its time to tell him that you want him more than you want anything else in your life. If you dont its something that will weigh on you the rest of your life. thats something im dealing with now and i wish i would've just said something.

>Be me
>18, senior year of high school
>Involved in theatre
>Going to put on Beauty and the Beast
>Best friend and I got singing roles
>He gets to play Lumiere while I'm stuck as the creepy asylum guy
>He fit his role, always was a flirt and the girls followed him around
>Always made me laugh during rehearsal
>Made everyone in the play feel more important in their roles, even the dancers and extras
>Stay at school late one night due to rehearsal
>Offer to drive him home, only lives a couple minutes away
>We set off at 10:20
>Stop at a convenience store first, get a couple sodas and some cigs
>Smoke outside the store for a few
>Old homeless guy offers to buy one and we tell him to fuck off, but nothing else happens
>Get back into my car
>Only on the road for thirty seconds when the entire interior is engulfed in light
>Semi truck hits the passenger side
>Car pushed off side of road
>Front tire and passenger door ripped off
>Flip into a ditch
>I'm hanging by my seat belt, being practically choked by it
>Blood dripping from my head down my right side
>Can barely see
>Turn head to friend, hurts like hell
>Homeless dude from before dragging him out
>Can't move
>Hear sirens
>Rescue team has to literally saw my door off to get me out
>Head injury only serious deal, cut by some glass, not too deep
>Can't find my friend at the scene
>He was airlifted to the hospital
>They drive me there
>Semi-Truck driver died, flew through window
>Turns out he was drunk
>In waiting room after they bandage me and have done check up
>My friend's family was waiting already
>Wait for six hours
>It's now seven in the morning
>They take us into a separate room
>Four days later, closed casket funeral
>Walk up to the stand
>Look at his 15 year old sister dead in the eye
>Choke up
>We manage to find another Lumiere
>Dedicate the musical to my best friend of ten years
>After final performance, his sister and I go to the convenience store
>Homeless guy is there
>We give him a cig

>>675014888
The worst is that next month I gonna move to my bf's place which is on the other side of the country, I don't even know if I will see my secret love again. But I can't ask him to leave everything for me. That's impossible now..
I just have to content me with the fact that I have found my soulmate, the greatest love in my life, and even if it's sad, I wish it to everyone in this planet.

>>675005628
I got chills.

>>675015949
Maybe one day both of you will find a way. And while you're waiting try to comfort yourself with the thought that you found what others search for a lifetime but can't find.

>>675015907
>>675014888 (checked btw)
>>675017076
Thank you guys for listening to me. Finally had the guts to write in a baww thread.
I wish you all a good night and more.
Farewell /b/ros.

>>675017875
Farewell /b/ro. I wish you the best no matter what will happen in your life.

>>675006209

Because you want to feel, brah.

Doesn't need to be anything more or less.

All these stories about people recalling childhood memories or mourning the loss of a friend. Well, i myself have never had a friend. Never. I always have been put down and bullied. I guess i can kind of sort of be glad about the fact that i never gave in and always fought back, but it has always been "me against the world".

Im 18 now, and i have never experienced friendship. It hurts man.

https://youtu.be/ecTm6G7AjcM

OP here, thank you for being here with me tonight. its been good spending these years on /b/. you guys are pretty much the only family i have anymore

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>>675019042

>>675019042
ill be your friend

>>675019042
do you like pokémon

ive worked out for 3 or so years (in highschool btw) Ive put my heart and soul into working as hard as i can. Peaple used to joke about how much i worked out. now ive lost almost all the strength that I gained. It may not seem like a big deal but it ment everything to me i though "if i just keep working out and being as nice as i can to everyone around me then ill succeed" but im slowly losing everything ive work for all that time lifting meant nothing. Im depressed all the time now, but i just think to myself "If i keep smiling some one might smile back at me right?"

>>675019042
the people in this thread are your friends we understand you becuase we're like you. /b/ is our hiding spot from the rest of the world because this is the only place that gets us.

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>>675014752
I wish you the best and that you will find peace. I will carry on the memory of you even if you're gone by then. Stay strong and never forget that I will never forget you. Farewell /b/ro.

I'm having an awful fucking time in New York. I booked a trip up here to see my family, but also to see one of my old best friends. We We're going to see Chinatown and Central park, but I would have been fine with something small like coffee, as long as she was somehow present. I planned the trip around meeting her Saturday but when I landed she cancelled till Sunday and she never texted me back about a time. Finally she juat bailed and left me in an awkwardly planned trip with a not so friendly family.

>>675004511
I don't get why there's so many fags try and speak for all of us that think there's a angsty depressing reason everyone on is so broken for the same reasons that they seek some gay solace in this website.

>2005
>little kid at the time
>loved my parents. They always treated me well
>Kept having horrible feeling that something bad was going to happen to them
>they played it off as a bad dream I had
>FF to 2008
>Both parents got cancer
>Mother got it early on so it was easily fixed
>Father not so lucky
>Stage 4
>Father Dies on his b-day
>Scared 8yr kid
>Fast forward today
>writing shit on 4chan

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Everything's going great for me

>>675020122
Thanks man. It really means a lot to me to know that there people out there who care.

>>675019813

Im guessing you dont mean this in the literal sense but thanks anyways /b/ro.

>>675019942

I used to, why?

>>675020906
so you're 15 or 16 now

>>675020673
Fuck, /b/.

>>675021374
Yup

>>675020801
if you don't get it just fuck off

>>675014548
I was on the other side. I loved her so much, I still do but I couldn't play like that anymore and had to walk away. I'm happy now but I'm still always thinking of what we could have had and how I still love her fantasize about running away someday with her and her daughter...

>>675005419
Okay fuck, that one hurt.

This is literally the only aspiration I've ever had. No dreams of being a doctor and shit, I just want to be able to make somebody happy. To brighten their day when it seems like the rain will just never end. Fucking hell.

>>675021256
we have something in common. we are friends now

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>>675022396

does anyone have that story about a cat who's dying on the vet and is "talking" to his owner?

>>675021870
MODS!!!!!

When i was in sophomore year of high school my mom's biological father passed away.
i have never met this man nor have i ever heard of him.
i've always looked at my mom's stepfather as my grandpa and called him grandpa and my grandpa passed away when i was seven years old.
so my mom tells me that yes this man is her biological dad. but she also tells me why she's never spoken of him or brought me or my brother and sister around him.
turns out he was a very bad father. he was abusive towards his kids and my grandma in the past. my mom said he would physically hit them and even burn out his cigarette butts on them. basically not the kind of man you would wanna stick around.
so i understood.
fast forward to the day of the open casket viewing.
literally just my mom, brother, sister, and step dad, and 2 other people there.
while i was there it felt so empty.
no tears. no sobbing. no nothing.
i remember my grandpa's funeral/casket viewing, and almost everyone was crying hysterically.
it was just sad to me to have nobody really seem affected by your passing. i don't think it gets worse than that.
like can you imagine dying and you're dead just watching everyone at your casket viewing, and there's just a small amount of people and nobody, not even your own family is crying.

>>675020801
you're in the wrong thread, trap thread is
>>674996066

I want to cry so bad I feel all this emotional tension in me but i cant get it out

>>675023290
I have felt the same way for over 2 years now

/b/ isn't my hiding spot from the world. wtf /b/ you guys are being kind of creepy tonight

>>675022945
I see a lot of this as a mortuary intern. It's really sad when no one shows too... Just a few passersby but no one crys, they have some cheese, look over the body, and leave

>>675023568
where do you go when you want to get away from everything?