You're at Walmart. Buy three items to freak out the cashier. What do you choose?
Pregnancy test, condoms, and a set of coat-hangers.
>>673464795
Three things made in America
A box of nails, a hammer, and a bible.
you faggots on 4chan try too much
A screwdriver, lube and a porn magazine.
>>673464795
Health insurance
>>673465555
>check em
Butter
Butter
I can't believe it's not butter!
>>673465378
>you faggots on 4chan try too much
Teddy Bear
Carving Knives
Bleach
Eggplant
Butter
Condom
>call me Caitlin magazine
>lube
>cucumber
>>673464795
Condom
Lube
Nigger
>rope
>bleach
>kiddie pool
>>673464795
Tissues, lube, batman costume
>>673465877
Well at least you had the decency to wear a condom.
Child underwear
Lube
Ether
Donuts, donut holes, and staples.
Plot twist, I took one look at the three open lines and went to a different store.
12 pack of Pepsi
12 pack of Coke Cola
12 Pack of Caffeine-Free Diet Mountain Due.
Ammonia
Bleach
A canister of any kind.
dog food
a rope
and a knife
several gallons of water
kiddie pool
toaster
mr muscle, tissue's, baby wipes
>>673464795
inb4 donuts, donut holes, glue
3 cans of full throttle
kids magazine
lotion
tissues
>>673464795
Cough Syrup, Distilled water, and filter paper
>>673464795
half watermelonhalf watermelon
super glue
cucumber
lube
my little pony equestria girls dvd
Camera
Rope
Wooden Chair
Peanut butter, socks, and paper clips
Dildo Bat
Gun
Vagisil
Frosted Flakes
XXXL condoms
rubberbands
a zucchini.
>>673464795
45
condoms
beer
tell her she's coming home with you
Shot gun shells, large garbage bags & shovel
>Mountain Dew
>Andes mints
>Milky Way midnight
She seemed creeped out enough
apple
banana
pineapple
>>673466921
You cheated motherfucker
>>673464795
a gun
an "im sorry" card
booze
>>673464795
to freak out that one i buy broccoli
Candy, black garbage bag, hacksaw
>>673466460
To the top! Zozzle, kekles on my cinnabun!
Candy, black garbage bag, hacksaw
4 pack of Toothpaste
gallon of orange juice
plastic toy bucket.
>>673464795
Lube, condoms and a large cucumber.
toothpaste
milk
cigaretes
>>673466766
kek
adult diapers
pacifier
baby bottle
How about one I saw in a local Coles supermarket:
Large tin of pineapple juice
Large tin of pineapple juice
Large box of rat poison
and the guy looked pissed off
>>673464795
Lube
Hatchet
Rope
>>673465555
Oh
>>673464795
Cheese, rum, baseball bat
Rope
A chair
A Kidz Bop CD.
laxatives
garden hose
sand
Laxatives
a washbasin
package of silly straws.
>>673466921
Gun
Bible
A huge black dildo
>>673466172
Repost kill yourself
Fried chicken
Watermelon
Grape soda
Candy, Duct Tape and Condoms
>>673464795
Little girl underwear , duct tape, video camera . Kek
>>673464795
1. Cheap Perfume
2. Fireball Whiskey
3. Morning after pill
Oh, sorry... This is HER shopping list
Brownie mix
Rat poison
Get well soon card
>>673467131
>>673467131
>>673467131
>>673467131
>>673467131
OH COME ON I MADE A JOKE HERE
heavy duty lock
large bird cage
duct tape
Peanut butter
Dog snacks
Ky jelly
>>673466766
>>673464795
Barbie doll, condoms, jello.
A casket
A can of spray paint
A stencil reading, "Walmart Sells Caskets"
>>673464795
3 bottles of benedryl
2 bottles of NyQuil
Large black trash bags
Lysol
Hacksaw
Surgical masks
>>673464795
Hi I need a jar of mayonnaise, a stopwatch, and a bible
Some road flares and a pair of pink panties
Case of motor oil and a blonde wig, that's what I need
>>673467026
oh anon... i got your joke
GIMME 200 dislikes please https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_ZGkkSuzrc
>>673467708
you aren't funny
Raw Chicken
Car Battery
Jumper Cables
(wear lab coat while shopping)
Fish from their aquarium, cups, and a blender.
>>673467796
god tier joke
>>673467634
Top fucking kek
New pajama pants
Assassins creed brotherhood for Xbox360
Lube
>fried chicken
>sledgehammer
>fishing pole
bird seed
oranges
tooth paste
Shotgun
Hacksaw
Heavy Duty Garbage Bags
An avocado, a roll of toilet paper and the board game Mouse Trap
A rifle
English translation of the quran
Ski mask
>>673464795
Lingerie, hedge clippers, and comdoms
>>673464795
KY Warming Gel
Egg Beater
Ibuprofen
A shot gun
A ski mask
and get my script for Xanax filled at the pharmacy.
Fuck that. Nobody is paying attention to what your mongoloid ass is buying. Just grab three items, each from a different department. Go to a fourth department, find the newest looking guy there and just start asking random shit about your items.
Banana
Syrup
Webcam
Condoms, lube, children's bed time story book
>>673464795
> Elmer's glue
> spray paint
> permanent markers
You will be asked to provide I.d. and be considered a huffer, for simple craft items
>>673465812
you took the bait :I
Draino, hacksaw, ammonia.
Condoms, a shovel, and a novelty bike licence plate featuring the cashiers name.
>>673465030
tits or gtfo
even if man titties still deliver with time stamp
3 #2 penicls
Knives, condoms, stain remover
Box of condoms
Sewing needles
Parenting book "for the unexpected"
Duck Tape
A Van (White)
A Child.
>>673468455
fucking lost
>>673465201
This.
/thread
back to the future 1
back to the future 2
back to the future 1
The sad truth is by the time you're a cashier at Walmart you're probably dead-eyed and oblivious to any of this stuff. It's not like they even notice or care that you bought bleach, duct tape and underoos, they see a parade of human filth all day, every day. If they're thinking of anything at all it's the end of their shift when they can go home and drink themselves back into a stupor.
>>673469225
No the sad truth is your mother was a coalburner
Blink 182 cd
stool softener
fried chicken livers
>>673467559
Come on, nobody thought this was good?
shotgun, shotgun shells, notepad
>>673464795
Giant pack of Charleston Chews
Wooden cross
Lighter
Show up in full bdsm gear over clothes
large ice chest
sulferic acid drain opener
hammer
Condoms, bleach, and yogurt
>>673469439
You might want to consider suicide.
>>673465746
i kekd
It's really fun to buy a giant stuffed animal from a thrift store, put sunglasses on it, drop it in the cart, and start talking to it like it's your passed out drunk friend.
pseudoephedrine, lye, cookware
>>673469552
How bout fuck off faggot?
5 parts charcoal
5 parts sulfur
7 parts potassium nitrate
>>673469439
I didn't.
Kanye cd
lighter fluid
bag of large cucumbers
Butter
Butter
>I can't believe it's not butter
>>673469337
I never knew my mother, she left before I was born.
>>673469439
I did.
Tombstone pizza
Red Baron Pizza
Ben Carson book
>>673465812
well played
Lube
A knife
A copy of Oedipus Rex
Ping pong balls
Large funnel
KY jelly
A dildo a Extra large dill pickle and duck tape
>>673469916
You want fries with that?
>>673464795
>I can't believe its not butter
>I can't believe its not butter
>butter
>>673469754
It's a black person! The cashier is supposed... nevermind, it's not fucking funny if I have to explain it....
EX lax
Brownie mix
Chocolate frosting
Gummy bears
Gummy bears
Gummy bears
>pay for it with a checkbook.
>>673469217
i cant even
>>673470237
I got it.
>>673470157
That response must be reflexive for you.
stuffed bear
condoms
hatchet
>>673464795
Hamster food
Lube
Duct tape
>>673467252
I'd do that, but it DEPENDS!
* Car battery jump starter pack
* duct tape
* condoms
>>673466235
i see ur bait
>>673467807
Can you explain anon?
>>673464795
Dog collar, lube, Richard Dawkins's "The God Delusion"
>>673470659
Cant find my shots fired gifs, but yea, shots fired.
Ex-lax
3 cans of refried beans
Imodium AD
2 pounds of cheese
>>673464795
Bobby pins, duct tape, lysol and a polaroid camera. Then snap a picture of the cashier.
Candy
Cable ties
Condoms
>>673464795
A infant's pajamas, Lube, and a very large cucumber. Make direct eye contact, do not smile and do not break eye contact until transaction is complete.
Caffeine free diet mtn dew
1 pound bag of sugar
2 bottles of NoDoz
>>673470237
she looks like aniken skywalker in episode 3
>>673464795
>>>>>sexy
>>673465201
The only three things you'll find in a Walmart made in America might be some of the employees.
>>673471517
Don't forget to tear the tag off the pajamas so they have to call a department head over for a price check.
>>673464795
a Broomstick
Vaseline
and a Saw
...ask her if I should cut my dildo 12 inches or 18
>>673470659
Come to Tampa and say that to my motherfucking face
>>673464795
>gun
>pills
>alcohol
or
>Children's book
>condoms
>lube, like a lot of lube
Just trips
>>673471899
Are you on the counter or the drive-up window tonight?
>zip ties
>a bottle of scotch
>a bag of crab legs
>>673471899
>>>>>>>>>>attention, keyboard warrior here.
>>673472154
kek
>>673471595
HA, yea she got the same look.
condoms
lube
and a teletubbies box set
Starch
Glass
Something as big as my dick
>>673469130
rope
lube
cloroform
•TV box full of stolen clothing.
•Knock of handbag full of stolen blurays
•Kitchen knife set full of stolen ps4 and Xbox games
>>673472435
Toothpicks are in the aisle with the paper plates and napkins.
>>673466100
i'm intrigued.
Gay porn
Dildo
Webcam
>>673471899
>fag, i will be at busch gardens tomorrow. meet me there
Diapers, nail gun, 2 planks of wood
Condom
Baby diaper rash cream
Cough syrup
>>673472161
>>673472092
Wtf That's not the op someone impersonated me
>>673464795
The Art of the Deal
The Art of the Deal
and
The Art of the Deal
Vodka
Transparent plastic bag
'fuck the police' t-shirt
Tiger Beat magazine
Lube
tissues
>>673464795
Frozen Chicken
Hammer
Tampon
>>673465746
kek
Ammonia
Bleach
Bucket
>>673464795
Frozen Chicken
Hammer
Tampons
school uniform
gun
happiness
>>673464795
>a tracing of her house key
>her work hours
>a list of her fears
Woman's extra large underwear, the first 5 seasons of MLP, and a extra large bottle of monster energy
>>673473700
My Little Pony Plush
Lube
Knife
>>673464795
A knife, duct tape, and lube.
Screws
Hammer
Crafts for Dummies
Something phallic
A large glass slightly bigger than phallic object
Tube of silicone
Just 3 price tags
>>673464795
Jake is this you, you fuck?
>>673464795
DVD of Sister Act: Back in the Habit
DVD of Sister Act: Back in the Habit
DVD of Sister Act: Back in the Habit
>>673464795
>sleeping pills
>band-aids
>razor blades
>>673466172
TOP FUCKING KEK
Kitchen knife
Shovel
Dish soap
>>673464795
Sugar
Salt
a bowl
Bleach
Pen
Noteblock
3 of whatever's by her hand
>>673464795
just mlp toys and poptarts
"th-thanks" tip my fedora and do a 360 and walk out with my lovely new purchases
Shotgun bullets
mouse traps
fishing string
>>673469439
This isn't /pol/
Oldest fucking nigger joke in the book is stale as fuck.
Walmart cashier reporting in.
None of this would freak us out. We could not give a shit less about you or your items. You could literally be buying anthrax and we'd ask you for cash or card.
>>673471899
>Being this sensitive
Donald Trump, relax this isn't CNN you touchy hobo.
>>673474613
Shhh don't spoil the magic.
aluminum foil
Anti Chemtrail mask
Book: government secrets
Prepaid phone
Dime bags
Baseball bat
>>673474392
>shotgun bullets
>bullets
You have no idea what you're talking about.
the quran
a bottle of ammonia
a bottle of bleach
>>673475183
Ooh boy lemme call em shells and be politically correct
Fuck off faggot
A strap on dildo
A tickle me elmo
Some lube