>>671812974
I've fantasized some disgusting things. I don't even know what was going through my head most of the time.

I remember I hadn't wanked for a week or so and I was on holidays at my nannas house for some reason.

I was horny as fuck so I went into her bathroom and fantasized that I was fucking my 55+ year old aunty. Shit was weird but I came so no biggy.

last thread is literally not 404'd

>>671812974
when i drop someone home late at night i take the 'scenic' route and fap till i cum, then i go home.

>>671813178

It will in a matter of minutes and there's no point posting in an autosaging thread.

>>671813173
>I've fantasized some disgusting things
This happens to me, followed by a paranoia that a mind-reader knows what I'm thinking about. Totally irrational but it happens.

>>671813337
there's not point posting in a story thread started by a liar

>>671813337
>13337 super leet

>be 14, horny af
>home alone
>not well educated regarding sex
>wanna do something more than just plain masturbation
>get a cereal bowl
>add baking soda
>add vinegar
>quickly lay down on top of the bowl with my dick in it
>feels good for about 3 seconds, then it's over
>feel unsatisfied, go back to normal jerking off.

>>671813396
Same. I think I've fapped over almost every co-worker female I've ever worked with. Literally almost all of them. Always paranoid someone will be able to read my thoughts or I'll accidentally spill the beans when I'm drunk or impulsive or something.

>>671813401

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

>>671813337
Who cares OP. Ignore them.

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>>671812974

>>671813540
>>>/b/

>>671813484
That's how I feel about anal stimulation. I end up with a dildo in my arse for 20-30 minutes and I haven't orgasmed so I just finish by jacking off.

Anyone here too scared too hook up on craigslist? The ballsiest I got was sending a few messages to women on there and the closest I got was one that turned out to be a paid service and the other turned out to be a scam.

Even if they were were real I think I'd be too pussy to even go there and do anything.

>tfw my hands were literally shaking message random women on craigslist
What is wrong with me? I haven't had sex in years and I'm too pussy to get a free fuck from craigslist of all places.

>Enjoy buckyball magnets in muh dick
>Slide them in, let them jiggle around as I walk
>Go to work at Lowes with them in, wrapped around head of cock
>They fall out
>Customer sees slimy magnets
>wtfs
>Consult 4chan for advice
>"Say it's medical"
>It works.

And then a year or so later, I must have done something wrong, because I flossed my urethra with buckyballs and peed blood for a night. (not entirely blood, just bloody piss)

Not taking the risk again.

when I was in 6th grade my friend and I would play his drum set with our dicks

Was out of town on work and alone. GF back home. Laid in the shower and pissed in my own mouth, then jacked the rest all over my body. Went to the hotel bed, put my feet up in the wall, came in my mouth and on my face. Later that night, horny before bed, woke up and was fingering my asshole, licked it and spat on it for lube and then continued fucking my ass and squeezing my balls.

Now have a watersports fetish. Ooops

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>>671813484
>kids

lol'd tho. thats adorable

> booked a hotel room for my wife to go and screw a random guy

>be 11
>hanging out at friend's house a lot
>friend has 9/10 older stepsister
>really horny one night
>his stepsister isn't home
>go in her room and rub my diamond dick on every pair of panties in her dresser
>cum in her bed
>go back to friend's room and go to sleep
>tell no one

>>671812974

>be in early teens
>go on chatrooms to "pick up girls"
>add them on msn
>jack off on cam

In retrospect, not a single one of them showed me proof they were girls. No camming, only stock photos of models.

I definitely jacked off on webcam to at least 20 chatroom pedophiles.

>>671812974
>be me 5mins ago
>brother is asleep in room
>jerking to porn webm thread >see a troll trap post
>very aroused
>lift up blanket and jerk it to bro's dick
>cum all over him
>feel retarded

What do now /b/?

>>671814086
post pics you liar

>>671814086
clean him up or cuddle idfk

>>671814086
Become an hero

>>671814086

Repress it for 5 years then post about it in a similar thread

>>671813484
another time

>same situation, home alone, horny af, bored of vanilla masturbation
>sit on the toilet to take a dump
>catch said dump in my hand
>got a turd the same size as my dick, held it in my hand while jacking off

Nowadays I stroke it to a lot of fucked up stuff, but for some reason I just can't get into scat.

>>671813644
Same here. It feels decent, but it's just not enough. The one time I came while a dildo was still in my ass, I clenched down on it and it hurt like a motherfucker.

>>671813806
pls respond

>>671814086
Say he must have came in his sleep or something?

>>671813867
lol "oops"
pics or it didn't happen faggot

>be in grade school
>hanging out with the kid next door, also same age
>for some reason we go under his bed
>we both get naked
>start touching each other
>rub dicks together
>start fire
>make smores

>was about 13
>had to stay with grandparents for vacation
>my grandpa needs to help a lumber take down some trees
>mfw i need to go with them
>bored to death in the woods
>wander around, picking moss from stems and shit
>suddenly feel tingly sensation in crotch area
>neat
>not bored anymore
>start to lightly rub myself trough my pants
>feelsamazing.jpg
>can feel my lips swell and the wetness come out
>nipples get diamonds
>take twig and rub it over my nipples, poke them with it
>sit on a big fallen tree in cowgirl position
>find a stump on it
>start to push against it
>shit's cash
>decide to go all in
>hastily pull down pants and panties
>let stump slide inside me
>all mossy and wet and it kind of hurts but i don't give a fuck
>rub my clit and pinch my nipples whilst riding the stump
>cum like a maniac
>dress again and go back to grandparents as if nothing happened

I can type out more if anybody wants

>be a fetus
>come out of my mother's vagina

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>>671813996
This one is for you

>>671814423
>>rub dicks together
>>start fire

use moar lube next time

>>671814427
Continue more

>Be 12
>Horny as fuck
>See pet dog on the grass
>Lay it on its back
>Enter its dog pussy
>Hear my mum coming
>Pull up pants and quickly go to the toilet to finish the job.

>>671814507
pic or it didn't happen

>>671814427
Post pix with the next ones. I want to know im not fapping to some dude's fantacies

>>671814427
moar!
moss in puss? idk about that tho...

>>671814427
Defs moar

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>>671814427
I liked this. You have permission to post more

>>671813173
did the same thing, except aunty was over 60

I guess growing up you get all sorts of weird sexual thoughts. The brain wants to experiment

>>671814427
ok wut.
this is a hippie girls wet dream. to loose her virginity to a fucking tree
mfw are you kidding me......
also, more.

>>671814678
Agreed, pics or doesn't exist

>>671814910
Funny thing is, normies are just as fucked up as the rest of us. They'd like to think they're normal and well adjusted though.

>>671814427
doesn't matter it's not like you're actually a girl

>>671812974

>>671803867

Where do I even start

>when I was around six I used to perform sexual acts that my older step sisters asked me to do (mfw I was molested)
>used to listen to my parents fucking and jerk off to it
>a couple of nights I jerkwd of while kicking my cat's pussy
>found a huuuuge double ender in my parents room and fucked myself with it multiple times
>used to steal panties from my mom's friends houses and jerk off with them/ wear them occasionally
>choked the aforementioned cat all the time when it pissed me off

All of this before I was 13, after that I

>tried multiple times to suck my own dick
>physically forced a girl to let me fuck her in the ass
>almost choked her to death when she hit me with a rock one night
>she tried to stab me and I punched her so hard her eye was swollen shut for 3 days
>later on I convinced another girl that I met on Facebook that she needed to leave her boyfriend, she wouldn't so I fucked her the first time we met (new years eve) and got her to break up with him over the guilt
>made her my sex slave for better part of a year
>backhanded the shit out of her one night and kicked her out
>filled a jar full of leeches and dropped a frog in for lulz

Cont when I think of more

>>671814507
Me too... she stopped talking to me later in life when I kept trying to cum back in.

>about 16
>get home from school, realized I forgot keys when I left in the morning, so cant get inside
>phone also dead
>not a single person home for another 4 hours (at the time I didn't know when someone would get home, could be an hour could be 5 minutes)
>bored sitting in front of my house
>get idea
>go into back yard through gate
>jerk it and come all over grass
>go back out front and wait 3 hours until someone gets home

should've just hung out with friends

>>671815075
That's called rape, anon, and it's illegal

>>671814536
>about 12
>very close with sister that's 10
>she comes over to my bed a lot at night and we just talk shit till we fall asleep
>one night we start gossiping about other kids in school
>"have you heard x and y are a couple"
>"bwahahaha, she's so ugly"
>"i bet they even hold hands, ugh"
>"or KISS!!!"
"ewwwww, *smoochsmooch"! Oh, anon i love you soooo much"
>mfw i or her really kissed the other when saying that
>"oh anon, i want to touch your peepee"
>LOLOLOLOLOL
>mfw we actually touch each others pussy trough pajamas
>"oh anon, lay on top of me i want to hump you"
>zoooooozles
>mfw we actually lay on top of each other and rub ourself agains the other till we cum
>go to sleep
>never talk about it again

Try this you horny bastards. I found my sis orbies. they are theses weird ball things look them up. Put them in big masons jar and fucked them. MMMMMMHMMM amazing boys.

>>671815075
you need to be exterminated.

How do I meet women anons? I don't have ANY social media. I literally don't hang out with anyone when I'm not working. I have a casual job and I barely work as it is. I just stay at home for the entire week when I'm not working.

How the fuck do you meet women?!

Also, I work with about 20 women who are all under 25 and they're literally all in relationships. Why even live tbh

>>671815216
did you have a stroke? this post makes no fucking sense

>>671815208
Shut up and let him continue.

>>671815075
Metal as fuck anon. Continue.

>>671813806
I've sucked a guys dick via Craigslist. Wasn't too sketchy, though there was quite a bit of back and forth before finally committing to doing it

>>671815075
>filled a jar full of leeches and dropped a frog in for lulz
so it made you horny??????

>>671815409
Yeah, I'm too scared too bite the bullet, but I'm definitely not dropping like $200 on a brothel though. I feel like I've been hornier lately though because I've literally had no sex in years now and I'm at almost my peak of testosterone so I'm mentally going wild.

Took a bunch of adderall and fucked a fat chick with no front teeth a whole night. She was super nice but those looks really screwed me up.

>>671815216
Femanon. Got more?
Bumping for interest

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>>671815572
$200 is the aids price. $400+ or a latex zentai suit.

>>671815771
nice

>>671815572
just put an ad on craigslist and be honest. yes you will get gay responses, but as long as you use protection and bring pepper spray, you should be fine.
or if you are near a college, show up or try to get invited to a party.
pro tip: never meet women at bars. only the worst women hang out at bars. the one exception is if they're with their friends drinking.
goodluck

>>671814086
> brother is 2 years old

>>671815611
I couldn't do that. Sex is too involved. I will end up staring deeply at my dick trying to memorize it's shape for future reference.

>>671815853
Yeah I did make an ad at one stage for w4m (women for men) and the only real response was a fucking guy. Jesus Christ.

Oh, and also a scammer who sent me a picture of "herself". I reverse image searched it and it came back with 100+ carbon copies of the same image. Turned out to be from some brothel way overseas. Just some asian scammer I think. They kept messaging me for days. Like I was going to be that fucking retarded.

One time, I raped my gf per mistake. I had a nymph gf at the time. She has several fetishes, over including rape. We were still experimenting with some kinds of sex but never thought of a code word. This would make it complicated for me to know if she meant it saying she doesn't want it, or she's just in her fetish mode.

>be 22
>gf said she wanted to be ducktaped to the table
>tape her legs to the table and tape off her mouth as well.
>looks hot as fuck
>my dick can't wait
>start boning her, spanking and grabbing her throat.
>feelsamazing.gif
>she start humbling no, stop.
>start pounding even harder as this is normally her signal that she wants it hard.
>start pounding and feel I'm about to come
>witness tears on her face
>I hesitate if this is for real and if I should stop.
>feel the cum gathering in my balls
>nowayback.avi
>start fucking her like a bull on steroids, and come inside her.
>rip off the tape, and see she's definitely crying.
>loosen her legs and she immediately walks to my bed, crying and dripping my sperm out of her pussy.

>>671814706
I was too horny to care

>>671814938
I wasn't a virgin at that point... The thrill of the possible exposure though. I'm into public sex and humiliation since that day

'nother story
>be 16
>work as a hairdresser
>no money left at all
>chatt with some dude that claims to hire escorts
>have dumbest idea ever and think i'm clever
>make plans to meet him in a dark parking lot
>mfw i actually went there
>mfw he's a really ugly old dude. About 65
>promised me 50 bucks if i suck his dick "to show my skills"
>i actually get in his car
>he starts talking shit, then starts touching my boobs
>takes them out of my shirt and starts pinching and flicking my nipples
>gets huge bober
>licks my nipples and tells me to touch his peepee
>i awkwardly rub his memeber trough his pants
>he takes it out and comands me to lick it
>mfw i actually blow him
>he tells me to get on all 4
>starts groping my butt and rubbing my slit trough clothes
>mfw i actually get aroused
>he tells me he's going to give me another 100 bucks if he can finger my pussy
>ohshitcash.gif
>he pulls down my pants and panties and greedily starts shoving his fingers inside me
>mfw he cums inside my mouth very quickly
>gives me money and drives away
>never heard of him again

>>671814086
Suck his dick and make him cum on himself so he thinks he just had a wet dream.

>>671816057
why post in W4M? if you are looking for a woman post in M4W (men looking for women)
there's your problem anon.

>>671815075
Why would you choke a cat? what kind of depraved shit is that? pls an hero

>>671815146
Under rated post

>>671815075
>>671815389
>>671815371

Cont.

>used to fantasize about fucking various hot family members
>still fantasize about this flirty cousin of mine. Girl makes me cum buckets
>got drunk with a guy guy and ended up sucking his dick. I didn't really enjoy it or get anything out of it
>tried fucking him in the ass but realized I didn't enjoy that either
>made out with a guy once because a girl we were with said it was totally hot and she let me fuck her after
>drew dicks all over my high-school for four years
>drew fantastic dick montages featuring different dick characters and taped them to walls, put them in trophy cases
>tripped a guy once during track on purpose and he totally fucked up his face for life, got away with it because I claimed it was an accident
>jerked of on a schoolbus once watching the sleeping girl across from me
>also fingered a girl on a bus once
>I sniff my shit every time I wipe to see what it smells like
>find pics of my younger sisters hot friends on favebook and jerk off to them
>when she was 16 I used to grab her panties from the laundry and cum into them
>multiple.times I have put bubble wrap in a small jar and fucked it (feels amazing you guys)

Cont.?

>>671816226
Oh fuck. I meant m4w. But yeah, I got gay responses anyway. I guess some guys just don't care.

>>671816057
>carbon copies

>>671816325
It's slang dickhead.

>>671815561

No I just want to list all the fucked up things I used to do

>>671816232

I was a kid and the cat was an asshole. I'm not like that now and it weird me out to remember doing it

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>>671816246
Like most sequels. A great disappointment to the original.

>>671816057
>Like I was going to be that fucking retarded
Scams are made retarded on purpose. If it sounds legitimate, people will waste the scammers time and drop out before they get anything. But if you make it retarded, only retards will reply and be more likely to give out their personal info.

>>671816077
no worries bro, i did the same thing, she literally said facefuck me, be rough i want you to hit me;
i asked what's her safe word. i'm guessing she didnt think i could go through with it and now she never speaks of that night ever again and refuses to let me cum in her mouth again
feelsbad.jpg

>>671816434
Ok there's probably still hope for you then, a lot of serial killers start out on animals

atleast you have to hindsight to know it was wrong, don't an hero

>>671816696
Nah I was skeptical from the beginning to be safe. Some of those chink scammers are dumb as dog shit. They can barely speak English and expect me to think I'm talking to a blond white girl?

>>671816319
well if you are posting to the correct page on CL and aren't getting anything in response, are you using a picture? are you a decent looking person? ie: not super hairy, fat, unibrow weirdo?
also, try the site Plenty of Fish. I've banged some dudes and chicks off that site a few times.
Where are you located? perhaps that's the problem?

>>671816819
>Nah I was skeptical from the beginning to be safe.
Then the scam was designed right.

>>671816840
>not super hair
nope
>fat
average weight, marginally carry fat in belly area, not even what I'd call chubby though
>unibrow weirdo
kek no, I look after my appearance
>located
Australia, metro, suburbia.

>>671816078
Ok, another one. I actually get aroused thinking back to those times and typing the stories out

Oh i got one! How i lost my virginity

>be 12
>have cute bf
>he's really into me
>someday some dumb girl tells me she saw him kissing another girl at the train station
>be extremely pissed and hurt
>iwantrevenge.exe
>there's this older guy (about 16) that is always flirting with me and pestering me to go home with him
>i text him that i'm coming over
>he responds in a matter of seconds
>go to his place
>he's smoking weed with a bunch of his friends
>we sit on his bed and stsrt making out
>simple as that
>we start to get hot and heavy
>can feel his hard boner pressing against me
>i found that pretty neat
>he starts playing with my breasts
>tells friends to go smoke on the balcony, kek
>actually am on my period but fuck it
>he yanks down my clothes and hastily rams his cock inside me
>must be a matter of seconds cause i can't remember shit
>didn't hurt cause period was good lube
>don't know if i bled
>he whipes his dick off and goes out for a smoke
>i just stay in the bed
>mfw one of his friends lays next to me and we start makong out too
>he starts rubbing my vagina
>get text message from my bf's friend if i want to go to the circus
>mfw i pack my stuff and go to the circus
>my bf was still mad at me for this when i met him again 5 years later

How romantic

>>671816078
Moar?

>>671816918
Why would you purposely make your scam look dodgy?

>>671816776

Thanks /b/ro. I deeply regret most of the fucked up stuff I did. Gotta carry it everywhere

>16
>I'd already had sex with 3 of my exes
>new gf is hot but super religious
>will make out with me for hours, let me feel her up, and after a some warming up will let me finger her
>will touch my dick through my underwear but never directly
>hanging out at her house one day
>we're fooling around a bit, didn't get as far as what I mentioned above but my dick was still diamonds
>she stops, wants to do something else like go for a walk, i don't remember
>tell her i have to go to the bathroom
>jerk off until i cum buckets all over her toothbrush
>wipe off just enough so she won't be suspicious

no regrets. i actually did it multiple times and it was deeply satisfying

>>671816754
That sucks man

made out with a chick and a male buddy of mine just so i could kiss a lesbian bitch

>tfw when it didnt work

>>671816972
tits? As in show them too us? Trying to imagine the scenario

>>671817045
Kek

>>671817085
it happens, she's done something kinda similar before, it was unwanted but it happened. if you understand shit happens, you should be alright

>>671817012
I already explained this. >>671816696

There is a chapter in "Think Like a Freak" on it. here is a 7 paragraph summary on it businessinsider.com/why-nigerian-scam-emails-are-obvious-2014-5

>>671816949
seriously? AUSSIE, not a total creep, not too fit, and you do go outside don't you? you aren't just some neckbeard downunder in his mums basement? then wtf? you need to look for the artistic chicks, the ones down to earth. They know the plight of the unwanted and the struggle of the different. try hanging out at art gallerys, coffee shops if they have artist nights, bring a friend with you so you don't look like some weird random dude by himself.
I'm in California, so people here are easygoing and generally openminded.

>>671817126
who are you quoting?

>>671814232
It's when you're almost cumming that you slowly pull the dildo out and it feels like fucking heaven.

>>671817312
Oh right. Sorry, I had to re-read it to make total sense of it. Thanks for the link.

>>671817328
>you do go outside don't you.
Yes, I have a job, an income. It's just retail and casual, but I'm not a NEET weeaboo obese fuckwit if that's what you're getting at.

>>671817328
>I'm in California, so people here are easygoing and generally openminded.
Mostly the same here in Australia. I've been told it's weird in countries like finland/sweden to talk to strangers. One of the two countries anyway. What a strange culture.

>>671817240
a couple years later I managed a fwb thing with her. Even in her early 20's she'd still only give handjobs. But whatever, I got to cum and it's not like it was any commitment. Also got some pretty good nudes out of it.
I still came on her toothbrush those times when I didn't end up cumming, or when she'd invite me over and then not want to fool around.

>>671812974
Bless you OP, the last one was gold!

>>671816246
Do us a favor and an hero

>>671814752
how did you get green letters with black background? closest is tomorrow with white letters and black background

>>671817002
How i met my first "long term bf".

>be 17
>attentionwhore in some sneaky chattroom
>rather ugly dude (24j gets super arroused from talking to me
>offerst to pay me 500!! Bucks to fuck me
>mfw i'm broke anyways
>meet him in the same spot i met that old fart
>we actually talk for a good while first
>then we get on the back seat
>he pulls out his dick and i start sucking on it
>he got bad phymosis but whatever
>he pulls out my boobs and starts awkwardly playing with them
>i sit on his lap, rub myself on his dick and shove my titts in his face
>he's VERY into that
>he tells me to get naked
>he fucks me doggystyle
>tells me he's going to give me 200 more if he can fuck my pussy bareback
>actually don't care since i'm on the pill and i don't really give a fuck about std's
>he almost nuts the second his bare dick touches my pussy
>he starts pushing his thumb on my anus and massages it.
>dick twitching intensivies
>tells me he's going to throw in another 300 if he can stick it in my pooper
>he pops my anal cherry abd it hurts like all hell broke loose
>he shoots his load inside me after 3 strokes
>mfw he want's to CUDDLE afterwards
>mfw he actually gives me a fucking 1000 bucks...
>mfw he asks me on a date the second day
>mfw i move in with him two weeks later
>my FUCKING face when we stay together for 3 years

>>671817581
yeah I have a couple Swedish friends, and the way their relationships work is mostly one nighters and nobody really gets jealous, but it's obviously more involved than that. Rather strange but whatever.
and I'm glad that you aren't a weeboo. lol I just needed to check to see if you were a lost cause or not. apparently not. good for you,
so yes, the artsy chicks are the best. stay away from bars, and try meetup.com if Aus. participates. it's alot of fun and a great way to meet new people.
have you had any experience with women?
do you even prefer women?
or do you just want somebody, be it male or female?

>>671813899
fuck off memester

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>>671813865

>>671817911
Anybody want more? I got one where i made out with a lesbian or one where i fucked a dude on a park bench.

>>671817999
>have you had any experience with women?
Yeah, I was in a long term relationship from about 17-19 on and off with complications. Had sex, anal, fisting. All kinds of kinky shit.

I dated a crazy tumblr feminist not long after and that ended really quickly. I'm glad because she's even crazier now than she was a a year back.

>do I prefer women
I'm straight yes, but my porn addiction has led me to shemale porn, sadly..

Realistically I'd prefer a long term relationship, but I don't see that happening any time soon.

>>671818253
Post any and all stories you have

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Appchanx my friend zixaphir.github.io/appchan-x/

>be 12 or so, don't honestly know
>older sister has moved out of house but left panties that no longer fit her
>silk
>pull them up on pillows
>hump like there's no tomorrow
>sometimes I'd put them on and jerk off
>cum all over them and be retarded enough to throw them in the laundry room cuz that's where dirty clothes magically get clean
>mom asks me about them all upset
>"who's are these?"
>realize I'm a retard and respond with "I have no idea, yours probably"

Oh god she knew

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>>671815075
>filled a jar full of leeches and dropped a frog in for lulz

>>671813850
Hahahahahaahhaha oh my fucking god I kek'd

>>671817911
Your terrible life decisions r very offputting
can'tfap/10

>>671817911
All these stories of whorish stuff, and you cant even take a quick titty pic for us? I'm really starting to doubt you're a chick, leaning more toward the "with a dick" here

>>671818720
Same actually, pretty disappointing

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Yuki is pretty easy to sum up, cute. Not as tall as the other girls, a slender body, and not very curvy.And just like the rest of her body, Yuki's butt would be fairly small too. Now, that isn't a bad thing, not at all. It would be the perfect size to grab, you could easily fit both cheeks into your hands. Giving her cheeks a small squeeze would pull them apart and reveal her butthole, which I guess would be one of the unique things about Nagato.Unlike the others, I don't think Nagato's butt would suit any particular clothing. It's the kind of butt that can't really be appreciated until you see it in the flesh. Not saying that her butt can't look good in clothes, but they would have to be pretty tiny and skimpy to really show off her cute rump.Her body might not have the same fatty softness as the others, but her skin is still smooth like silk, which makes her butt quite a pleasure to touch and feel. Having such a small ass would make Yuki's anus rather defenseless, as doing something simple like bending over would be enough for her cheeks to move and reveal her cute hole.Speaking of, Yuki's asshole would be a medium size, with fairly deep wrinkles and texturing. Unlike the others, there wouldn't be any trace of color, remaining the same shade as the rest of her skin.Smell would also be non-existent. Given what Yuki is, things like smell or taste wouldn't really exist. Of course, Yuki washes herself, so there might be traces of stuff like soap, but there wouldn't really be any strong smell of sweat or natural scents or anything of the like.Yuki's butt would be extremely tight. It would take quite a bit of work to get yourself in there.I guess Yuki would have a perfect butt for people that are into butts and buttholes, yet don't like the idea of smells or tastes. A very clean and pure butt!

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>>671818898

>>671815216
Nice b8, Mr. FBI

>>671819126
Mr fbi did too many drugs before typing that garbage out

>>671812974
Lurking these threads gives me lol's, might as well share mine for any other lurkers. After this, I'm out.
>woke up one morning, dick = diamonds, hadn't fapped in 3 days
>not your average morning boner, more like I NEED TO FUCK OR SHIT WILL HAPPEN
>sadly don't have GF or fleshlight, so horny can't make a fifi
>completely undresss
>lock door
>get on knees
>fuck my bed in between the box spring and mattress
>do this for 20 min until knees get sore and close to cum
>run into bathroom, pull up a porn pic, and jack off into toilet barely able to stand
Not as fun afterwards because my dick got sore from rubbing against material, but at least I didn't explode and rape something.

>>671818282
ok so all in all it just sounds to me like you are perhaps a shy guy.
Feminists I have found are either super cool, or horrifying. Kinda like there are regular Muslims, and then there are Jihadists..lol
just go out and see who you run into. and don't be shy, but be tasteful, and eloquent.
nothing wrong with Shemale porn. I enjoy it also. you like what you like. you are who you are.
long term relationships only happen because two people really like eachother. it's not like a couple sits down on their first or second date and decides " oh I need you to be around for the next 2-5 years or forever"
it just happens. never plan ahead, it takes the fun out of life.
onward anon, and to prosperous victory and happiness!
if you are ever in Ca, you know where to find me.

I taped my girl's mini vibrator to my penis

I later was arrested and they found it

>>671819333
>perhaps a shy guy
Strangely.. No. I'm incredibly extroverted, hell I can flirt my way through anything, but I have severe depression, and also a major fear of rejection. I sometimes ponder how I even managed to get into relationships in the first place.

Thanks for all the advice friend. It's definitely been great talking to you.

>>671818308
Okey

>be 20
>be on a farm in france as an intern
>boss has daugter that's 18
>has hired a lesbian that's 20 too
>we three have a REALLY good time, get close friends
>sleeping opportunities get scarce cause he offers rooms for rent
>the three of us have a neat idea
>"let's share a room! It will be so much fun!"
>we have one giant bed
>lesbian is always eyeing me and being a bit touchy
>tells me i have gorgeous eyes and perfect boobs
>ok then...
>one evening bosses daughter has to leave and we decide to say goodbye by drinking sangria, talking shit and such
>get slightly tipsy
>at around 3am, we get tired and start cuddling on the bed
>bosses daugter falls asleep
>i get under the blankets too
>lesbian is in the middle
>she slightly adjusts her bare leg so it touches mine
>don't care
>she lays her arm next to my belly
>whatever
>she starts to caress me in the geeeeeeentlest way
>i freeze but kind of like it
>she starts to get bolder since i'm not shying away
>lets her fingers run over my stomach
>i get goose bumps
>she gets closer and i can feel her breath on my neck and ears
>i can feel my nipples tingle
>ever so slowly she kisses my earlobe
>mfw it's like electricity shooting down to my lady parts
>she brushes away my hair and starts to kiss and nibble my neck
>lays her hand on the small of my back and turns me toward her
>i'm all skin and nerves at that point
>she brushes her lips agains mines
>i gently reciprocate
>we kiss and get more sensual by the second
>she lets her tongue glide inside my mouth
>our tongues touch and that was it
>she climbs on top of me and pins my arms down
>we make out like maniacs
She pushes her lady parts agains my leg and simultaneously rubs her legs agains mines
>i get sopping wet and i can feel my lips swell with arousal
>she gently cups my boobs and is absolutely in awe with them
>feelsgoodman.jpg
>she takes my shirt off and runs her parted lips over my dimond nipples
>whoa there...
Cont

>GF broke up with me
>stayed in same apartment for about 3-4 months
>cum on her dildos often
>cum on her bed and clothes
>She would go on tinder dates
>would keep all the used panties that smelled like sex and wet pussy
>jerk off to them still today about 6 months later

>>671814427
fake, but go on.

>>671819486
dude you sound really decent.
rejection is just the human sorting process. you should be greatful you don't have to deal with everyone you meet, long term.
as a depression sufferer i get it.
(i did some light therapy and vitamin D therapy daily and i found it profoundly helpful)
you are not rejected here my friend.
cheers.

>>671819643
of course cont, come on

>>671819890
Thanks again. I wish I could meet people like you in real life. This is the kind of thing I come to 4chan for. Not all the shit posting I see.

>>671819985
Then you're on the wrong board.

>>671820136
Nah. Been here for years. I like some shit posting if its funny. Straight up bait posting is irritating though. Some of the culture is good. Some of it isn't. Just my opinion.

>>671819643
>she lets her hand cup my vulva and rubs up and down on her
>slides her finger between my lips, i still have my panties on
>i can feel my wetness soak trough the fabric
>she pulls thw panties aside and glides inside me with one swift motion
>i'm a bit overwhelmed, but in a good way
>we continue to make out whilst she fingers me like a pro
>she kneads my labias and circles my clit
>she caresses my thights and pinches my nipples
>i feel more like she is playing an instrument very skilled
>i'm absolutely helpless to her touches
>i can feel a huge orgasm rolling in
>i tense up and push hard against her hand
>she increases pace and intensity and i have one of the mpst spasmic orgasms i ever had
>she takes me in her arms
>showers my whole face wirh tiny pecks
>i drift off to sleep with her gently caressing my hair and holding me tight

>mfw we hold hands and stargazed the next evening then never talked about it again

damn, i was so selfish

>>671820331
Are you Australian?

>>671819985
well I am a real person believe it or not, even though we are thousands of miles apart. you just have to keep a keen eye out for the authentic human beings. however it's a good thing we are rare, or else it would be a very jaded and boreing world.
I suggest attending Burning Man. if not for the great people watching, there are some really fantastic humans gathered there. and Aussies are always welcome. come to Ca.

>>671820475
I've heard some places in CA are good. And yes, if everyone was the same, we would be a very boring planet.

>>671815343
get yourself in shape and go out drinking with your coworkers. Even if they are in a relationship. Make contacts. find a single girl you like. Everybody walks the dinosaur

>>671820431
oh shit! winrar!?

>>671817581
I'm from California, lived there for 19 years.
I can say that finding open minded, easy going people is rare, and I have no idea what part this anon lived in. I've asked strangers in grocery stores where something was, and 8 times out of 10, they death glared me and walked off. I also got in an accident and wasn't able to call for help. People drove by for 20-30 minutes, not even thinking of stopping. A cop finally was passing and helped me out.

I have way too many stories like this. Fuck California.

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>>671818720
>>671818852
>>671819812
God damnit. Here you go you memelords

>>671815343
Get Youself in shape. Meet people. make connections. Go out drinking with female coworkers. Everybody walks the dinosaur.

>>671820713
Finally. You may continue.

>>671820678
ok wtf anon. what city were you in? I'm in the 530

>>671820431
Yeah.

>>671820713
dicks in hand gentlemen, time to blow a load to dem titties and stories.

>>671818720
THIS

>>671820832
WINRAR!!!!!!
must meet!
you're welcome

>>671820808
Cities*
I lived in Sac, LA, San Bernardino, and visited the bay area more times than I have pubes.
I didn't realize how shitty it is there until I literally moved across the country.

>>671820885
Can you tribute my mammaries?

>>671820832
Where abouts in Australia?

>>671820896
See>>671820713

>>671820995
Radelaide

>>671820713
holy shit, a femanon that actually contributed

this was a good day /b/

>>671820885
So, you idiots want more or is it already too late?

>>671821074
Fun fun. I'm in Brisbane. No one is ever local. Shit sucks.

>>671820987
well THERE'S YOUR PROBLEM!
all those places are utter shit!
I frequent the north coast and the 530
people from sac and the bay are shitheads as well as socal. you were just in the wrong place and the wrong time. my condolences to you.

>>671821122
check'd and yes, more

>>671821122
go ahead

>>671821122
post more!
>>671820885
>>671819782
i'll tribute you!

>>671820987
I should add this though. I always forget north of Placerville is a thing. It can be nice up there. Can be. But they can also be kind of xenophobic up there. I spent about 6 months in Colfax.

>>671821040
Yes, i apologize, she isn't full of shit

>>671812974
>be 14
>at mathematics tutor with 1 male and 3 females including the elderly teacher
>studying at rectangular table, I'm pretty certain as it normally was so
>start jacking off under the table
>keep my camouflage well
>don't bust nut
>studying ends
>we all leave
>go outside behind a concrete wall and continue jacking off to finish the journey of which I started
>dad comes to pick me up
>adjust dick in pants
>walk to car, say goodbye to a fellow pupil waiting for his lift
all that risk and the variables of which could have happened and I didn't even bust a nut. God damn it

>>671821152
I had a dyslexic moment and read 503 (no idea if thats even in ca) not 530. I added it can be nicer up north. I don't really count that as CA and fully support you guys seperating from the rest of CA. Especially Sac. Fuck sac. With a red hot rod. Its the gooch of california

>be 16
>stay at friends place
>got some booze and stole sleeping tablets of his mom
>says its cool his mom will pass out soon can get loaded
>he passes out 1 hr later
>go creeping into his moms room
>she is huge fat
>try and wake her
>nope shes out cold
>lift her dress up
>fuck her fat ass cheeks
>twice
>image still haunts me
>god help me

>>671812974
That's not horny, that's just plain autistic

>>671821235
Colfax is terrible.I lived there myself, as well as Auburn. Humboldt, Mendocino, Eureka, Grass Valley (currently) are all awesome places to live. Everyone is really friendly and kind and life isn't so fast paced and shitty and loud. also great concerts.

>>671821134
What sucks more is desperately wanting to bang a co-worker but being too shit scared.

>>671821452
Lol'd. Lovely

>>671821547
Sounds like 90% of the women I want to fuck that I work with. Literally all of them have boyfriends though.

>>671821506
Somerset is really nice. If I had to go back to CA (which I wont be), that's where I'd live. I wwas only there for about 2 months before enlisting.

>>671813806
I have this problem with a lot of situations in life. The only thing that's wrong with you is an over abundance of anxities.
My own situation is not as bad as what you've described, but I know how you feel. If you haven't already go to the doctor. Medications won't rid you of your mental issues completely but they will help ease the stress that comes from them.
Tldr: I get anxious too. I went to doctor and meds kind of help.

>>671821433
as much as Jefferson sounds nice, it's not a good idea at all. We don't have a big enough economy (import/export) to survive as a independent state. no if LA was separate, I could get behind that, because at least the rest of the state would have the bay to keep it afloat.

Never told anyone but here goes

>be 13
>masturbate to all kinds of porn
>stumble upon beast
>have 2 dobermans
>start experimenting with both
>naturally start thinking about pentetration
>Both dogs are fixed
>Decide anal is a good idea
>spit on cock and pound my dobermans ass
>blow gigantic load
>shit was cash
>stop masturbating and start fucking dogs on the registration

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I just want everyone to acknowledge that someone is buying Oprah's clothes to do some nasty shit worthy of this thread.

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>>671812974
>be me, working in north of England as body piercer/dogsbody at tattoo studio
>boss asks if I want extra cash
>doesabearshitinthewoods.jpg
>get given bag of piercing equipment, disposables, sharps bin and gloves... LOTS of gloves
>taxi to address
>middle-aged euro-whore wearing expensive dress answers, escorts me to basement
>be 50, maybe 60 people, semi-naked, snorting coke and drinking vodka and inserting an assortment of sex toys into an assortment of holes
>my job is to pierce people wherever they like, no jewelry just needle in, slide out and leave plastic canula in place...
>spend all night inflicting pain on rich assholes and their sluts, snort my own weight in coke and get sucked off by 4 different women and one hot dude
>get paid well for my time, as well as nearly a grand in tips
>make contacts I still do business with nowadays, nearly 15 years later

Surreal, erotic, free drugs, and lots of cash - I still wank to the memory of one of those blowjobs to this day, it was THAT good.

>>671820713
well, i am diamonds nao. i want more stories and more pics. those tits, damn

>>671821784
Gotta love autocorrect

>>671820713
She actually did it, the absolute madman!

>>671821506
Now that i think about it, my grandfather was one of the most hated men in Colfax after a bit. A couple years ago he lied to the paper about his military service and somebody found out. Because of that, I left there and never came back.

>>671821697
I think I need to cut back on caffeine too. I'm quite sure it's increasing my anxiety.

>>671821668
Haven't been there more than a day. Seems like a decent place. North Bay, around Navato/Point Reyes/Russian River is my favorite.

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>be 18
>total sissy boy loved being told what to do
>huge fetish for my ass being dominated
>go on omegle to show my ass for people getting off
>old hairy guy tells me to get doggy and spread ass
>tells me I'm a good boy and cums when I gaped

>>671821783
I was thinking use the gay area as the mid way point. We'll keep oakland, the shittier half, since they'll have LA, Stockton and Bakersfield. Watch our crime rate plummet

>>671822056
don't know whats gayer you or that story
please contract aids

>Be working at Taco Bell
>Regional Manager is this 5'1, dark haired beauty with huge tits and nice cute ass. Beautiful white pale skin.
>A perfect 10 in my opinion.
>Comes to our store every now and then.
>Be cleaning toilets.
>Done with women's restroom.
>Leave for men's restroom.
>Leave to get something for the restroom to be restocked. Notice women's restroom is in use.
>Lobby was already closed and only drive-thru is open.
>All the other workers are still at their stations, but perfect 10 is gone. Her car is outside, but empty.
>Go back into men's restroom.
>Hear her leaving women's restroom.
>I check the lobby just to make sure it was her. She sits there texting on her blackberry.
>I go into women's restroom.
>Overcome by semi-thick shit smell, but also a scent of her perfume.
>She had taken a dump.
>Go through garbage.
>This bitch had wiped her ass and thrown it in the garbage.
>Steal that whole fucking 2 long strands of light shit covered toilet paper and put it in my pocket.
>Get home. Smell it.
>Start to lick it.
>Cum buckets.
>Still have that TP somewhere.

Jacked to step-father / daughter porn with the door open while my gf's daughter was in the room next to ours.

Basic but hit myself in the face.

>>671821990
I live on Mother. That shit keeps me awake (I work in sales) but I think you're right. It makes me uber on edge too.

>>671822056
Cock please!!!

>>671812974

Sex with horses. Shit's cash.

>>671822137 kek

>>671822183
>that shit keeps me awake
This is only because you're already dependent on it. Once you completely break the dependence of caffeine you wake up feeling 100% normal without the urge to consume caffeine. Waking up a little groggy is normal though for any person. You've just gotta give it 30 minutes before you've woken up properly.

>>671821944
I think I herd about that, but I'm not sure. well the north coast awaits. if you ever return, you know where to find me.
cheers.

>>671822034
Everything is just really spread out. Where I was, it took 30-40 minutes to make it to the closest store for an $8 pack of cigarettes

>>671821122
I love to tease
>once i had a bf and we went out for dinner
>when i got to his place i got on his bed on my belly, writing a quick text to my mom
>he was a certified ass man so i wore really tight legging that day
>i could tell that his eyes where popping out over that sight
>i told him to come over, climbed on top of him and started to kiss him very energetic, rubving my tightly packed vagina over his alerted memeber
>he told me to stop it cause we had to go in a few mins
>i didn't listen but instead pulled throw him back on his bed and janked down his pants and briefs
>his dick was already swolen and twitching
>i grasped it firmly and started to rub his tip over my still clothed vagina and anus
>then i teasingly let him enter me a bit trough the leggins
>i took them off and swiftly let him slide inside me
>he moans and squirms
>i give him a few good thrusts then get dressed again
>i tell him to pull his pants up and get ready
>he's confused as all hell but does what i tell him
>we go out to eat and he can barely contain himself
>groping me at every opportunity
>there's anotger dude in our age and he is eyeing me up and down
>i can tell that my bf is feeling like a million bucks right now
>when we get home again, he throws me on the bed and wants to fuck my brains out
>i tell him i want to go on a walk instead
>you should have seen his face
>zoozles
>it's dark and about 5 mins in i tell him to stop
>we are walking along a river and there's nobody around
>i get on my knees and open his pants
>i takes his throbbing dick out and let my tongue slide all over it
>then i take him deep down my throut nd suck him real good for a short while
>i button him back up, takes his hand and start walking again
>he has troubles walking and it amuses me
>we get to a hifhway wirh lots of cars
>there's a bridge
>i lean on the rails and he stands behind me
>i push my butt agains him and tell him to take me

Cont

>>671822183
energy drinks are toxic as fuck

>>671822146
Was expecting you took sly stealth photos whilst she was in the bathroom. What a plot twist

>>671820713
so...u gone or typin a new story and takin new pics? iwant.jpg. Any chance of timestamped pussy?

>>671822508
Cont

>he fucks me HARD and people can see
>i get fucking aroused by that
>i stop him again and we go down to a bench at the river
>i sit on his lap and tell him that it's now time
>i get out of my pants and take his dick out
>i let him slide inside me and start humping away
>he cums in a few seconds
>god those spasms and moans...
>i let his cum drip out of me whilst he is holding me tight, telling me that he loves me

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>>671822146
I really hope this did not happen

>>671822146
this is the type of quality content htat i come here for, great story anon

>>671822641
See
>>671822508
>>671822684
No more pics
I'm here for the stories

>>671822324
fuck off randy

>>671822508
see>>671822641
pussy would be neat

>>671813974
POst ehr pic.

>>671822508
More please!

hi guys femanon here

>be 15
>guy wants me to be a whore
>be a whore
>get paid
>continuously be a whore cause i had a fucked up childhood

and still to this day i go on 4chan and post about my whore behavior

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>>671820713
jesus h chris. those are nice.

>>671817811
through the settings css. its hard to make if u do not know html and css properties.

theres a similar option on the bottom settings that say style on the bottom right corner of the thread. click on it and set it to tomorrow

>>671822781
damn...than keep the stories commin. made me horny. thx. u def do tease....so overthink that no pic thingy...i really need to fap now!

>>671822146
What if she took a piss?

>>671813624
Where the fuck do you think you are faggot.

>>671822886
you know the rules

>>671813178
Last one was good though

>>671823209
haha...i thought only me hoped so

If I have contact with a female semi regularly I soon want to fuck them.
There are only a few exceptions.
I'm married so I don't try anything but if I were approached I'd probably jump them right there and then. Any woman.
I don't understand why it is this way but it is.
I want to fuck everyone.

>>671823553
>I want to fuck everyone.

FUCKING KEKED

>>671822883
Last one. I have to go

>Be 13
>have crush on fucking handsome dude about 17
>i tease and flirt with him everytime we meet
>smiiling, touching, sitting on his lap, banter
>i already have him on my leash
>one evening i was bored at home
>i tell him to come over
>he's nervous cause parents and shit
>tell him to man up
>he climbs in trough my window
>i greet him with a greedy french kiss and he almost falls back out he's so surprised
>tell him to wait, grab my jacket and climb out to him
>he takes my hand and we walk around town
>it starts to rain and i'm freezing
>he gives me his jacket and puts hia arm around me
>i'm horny as always and i can see him glimpsing at my soaked shirt and piercing nipples
>i can't contain myself anymore and push him agains a wall in a dark ally
>i push my body against him and kiss him very passionately
>he breaths heavily
>fucking shy
>i take his hands and place them on my boobs
>he's on cloud nr 9 now
>i grasp his butt and firmly pull his crotch to mine
>i can feel his hot dick against my swolen pussy
>i tell him a know a good place
>i take his hand and tow him to a public bathroom near
>we get inside
>we're all wet and shaking
>we don't even bother to go inside a stall
>he lifts me up and pushes me against the wall
>my skirt is hiked up so he only has to pull my panties aside and insert his meat
>he plows ne hard and i love it
>love the cold hard tiles and gis hot hard dick inside me
>i tell him to gurry before my dad finds out i'm gone
>he shoots a HUGE load inside me
>we straigten our clothes and run home, holding hands, his cum dripping down my legs
>who cares i was soaking wet anyways

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>>671813806

I did it once. Was headed to an out-of-area place for three days, wanted to get some pussy.

>Gril messages me
>Tells me 'I'm too cute for CL
>Wouldn't like a big gurl like her'
>I'm a beta nice guy
>Make her feel good about herself

>Go to the city where I said I'd be on CL
>She sends pic
>thiscouldgetinteresting.png
>Forgot that it was an overhead
>Forgot that it was CL
>I get there, and there she is, on a couch
harpoonsmanned.exe
>Missing some teeth
>Looked like her and meth had had a history
>Talk to her for 4 hours, hoping that she'll get tired and give up
>Now I'm getting tired, the sky's beginning to lighten
>'So, you wanna do it or no?'
>Pussy is pussy
>fuggit.jpg
>Sexytime ensues

>She didn't shave
>She's fat as fuck
>Should've brought flour
>I worry about her having herpes as I'm wiping the sweat off my forehead as her vaginal fluids are running down my arm and now, my brow
>Do Not Want
>Hit it with a condom. Still worried about herpes
>Bust
>Who gives a fuck
>Apologize
>Leave

She texts me one time afterwards, but I really was with friends. Still don't know that bitch's name.

Would still do it again/10. You have to do it at least once, anons.

>>671820713
>>671817911


MICHELLE?!??

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>>671823888
nigga don't go

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>>671822684
small load :( fourth time today

>>671818253
Hey i fucked a girl on a park bench.

>>671824017
what. the. fuck.

>>671823985
Sorry anon, no

>>671823990
I have to! I would rather stay, believe me... But i only came here to rev myself up for when my bf comes over tonight

>>671824017
Fucking saved for touching myself later! Thanks anon!

Bye you horny fucks

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>>671824227
all the pleasure was mine !

>>671824227

Fuck that the girl I know went to some horse thing in France and was a total freak, had tits just like that I'm calling bullshit

>>671824354

Also she was the one that introduced me to /b/ so many years ago

>>671824354
There was only one horse...

>>671813462
These newfugs dont know what that means brah

>>671823888
last question! how many guy have you slept with?

>>671824410
Also, i never introduced anybody to /b/. Sorry to dissapoint you

I might be back later. Maybe make a new thread

>>671824543
I had some abstinent phased so i clock in at 15

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>>671824567
Wish I could catch it! it's almost 6 am here

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>>671815075

>>671816246
ur a real weird dude anon

>>671824567
would appreciate. but get sum more pics involved next time

>>671824695

I used to be, I havent done shit like that in years. I was a weird fucking kid growing up

>>671824682

I'm sorry to say it's all true mayne

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>>671824835
I can dump some tame pics if interested

>>671821802
More Eyes Wide Shut plz !

>>671825073
yep! we want those! you might make me cum a 5th time!

>>671825073
OH hell yeah!!!

>>671824835
>>671825073
>>671825221
dick in hand and waitin. lel

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>>671825201
>>671825221