i enjoy sex in the missionary position with the lights off

I've never seen any of the original star wars movies and just base all star wars knowledge off of vidya.

I actually think of ways to kill people and get away with it if I were to pull it off. Some of the shit i have thought of was just fucking cold man.

>>654643396

Fapping is much easier than getting laid

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>>654643864
pervert

I'm a fag

>>654643396
i can only get off by tying my legs to my bed and fucking myself with a hairbrush

I'm a tulpafag

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>>654644589
wow

Tasted shit because of scat porn, tastes sweet

Your son is the villain and you have to decide between killing him or nuking the commonwealth.

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>>654645061
jesus

I've fucked my cousin, and i'm not from the bible belt.

>>654645230
lies

>>654643396

I'm incredibly shy about having an enormous penis.

>>654645329
lies

>>654643396
i eat my own cum and i want to fist myself

I go on 4chan

unlike you fags, I obey rules 1 and 2

I'm in love with my best friend even though I'm married with 3 kids but I'm afraid if I tell her she won't be around anymore

i've been having an affair with my neighbor for 2 years

>>654645540

I wish. ;_;

>>654645563
I also do this, subtracting the fisting. However I fucking love anal

Daryl is dead

picture with timestamp

>>654643396
i am sexually attracted to female animals.... not explicitly i a much more attracted to women but also enjoy watching male dogs rail human women

>>654645568
>obey rules 1 and 2

Get out newfag.
>Speshal secret club

I pooped my pants until I was 10 years old.
No joke

>>654645568

>spot the faggot

>>654644074
i havent seen them either. everything i know about them are random things i grabbed off the internet.

>>654645083
>Your son is the villain
the institute are the best people in the commonwealth.
BoS is shit
Railroad is cool but no future
Minutemen is family

I like to finger my asshole when I jerk off, I also fantasize about getting fucked in the ass like someones dirty whore

I find animals sexually appealing and fuck them, I find people repulsive.

I wanna fuck my friend becca raw but shes with a nigga and a purger.

I'm not gay, I have a girlfriend and have sex daily but.... A few (4-5) years back I gave and received a blowjob from my friend.. It would happen a lot like 3 times a week I would sleep there just to do it, his mom was unaware.. Didn't find him "attractive" just enjoyed the fuck out of it

I have finally mastered the art of giving myself head. I no longer fap, I swallow my cum every time now.

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>>654643396
I draw my own blood with needles and vials I bought online, then keep the vials in my refrigerator.

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I used to be a guy and I haven't told my bf, we have been together for a month and a half and he is wanting sex but I still have my penis and don't know how to break the news to him. I have no clue what to do.

>>654643396

I have sex with cats

>horny as fuck when i was a teen
>wasn't getting laid
>got really horny one day and tried to fuck my cat
>started doing that often
>finally evolved to fucking strays in public
>started to feel bad after doing this for a couple years
>actually got a girlfriend at 21
>decided to get tested just in case and i was clean
>gf and i are happy (i will never tell her)
>i don't fuck cats anymore

I would probably kill myself if anyone ever found out about my past

>>654646443
i do this except dont refridgerate them

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am a pedo, never done amything and never will

I fucked my cousin when we were teens. Now she has a daughter that looks alot like her. Damn, I want to fuck her too.

>>654646458
kill self

>>654646390
I did this once, however I'm no longer flexible enough to do it again. I now have stretch marks on my back.

>>654646458
>used to

>>654646540
Do you have a reason? I was getting blood drawn one day and was like"huh, I should really be doing this." So I did.

>>654646484
>i do this except dont refridgerate them

>>654646484
i'm curious about the logistics of this - wouldn't it be too small or summat?

>>654646484
tiniest cock ever

>>654646484
Like, penetrating with your dick?

>>654646541
I hate myself for being a pedo. Like how can I not?

>i feel like a woman trapped inside a man's body

>>654646797
Have you ever seen a cat penis? I can't imagine a cat vagina feels very... Receptive.

>>654646484
>tested
For what? Were you sharing your cat with other humans? Did you fuck slutty cats?

>>654646098
...
...
Same here.

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Gore pictures and videos are the only thing that make me happy, It's all I can think about anymore. Edgy, I know. But it's my biggest secret.

I actually enjoy spoilers , they allow me to skip boring parts of series

>>654646484
how do you even fuck a cat. they have tiny genitals...

>>654646212
>the institute are the best people in the commonwealth.

Opinion discarded.

>>654643396
I'm incredibly flexible and as a result have sucked my own dick multiple times. People have even made a joke i could suck my own dick because of how flexible i am, i just laughed it off and agreed. Little did they know :^)

>>654646979
Hey I am trans too and can help you get on hormones.

Daryl is dead

>>654646715

they're not too small.
I never counted, but I guess I probably fucked somewhere between 30 and 40.
I was pretty serious about it for like 3 years.
I remember a couple in particular that were real nasty fuckers that i had to pin down and shit.
but most were actually pretty docile as long as i was gentle.

brings back bad memories even thinking about this shit. such a low point

>>654647028
That's not a secret but I'm the same way. I much rather someone quickly tell me what happnes.

>>654646458
Cut penis off.
No but really you're a horrible person for leading him on this long.

>>654646644
my friend has major stretch marks on his back, im gonna make so much fun of him now

>>654644589
are you a chick?

Well, I dated a stripper. That's something I don't tell people.

>>654643396
I've given myself all of my scars. Not for any edgy reasons. I just wanted a new scar. They're pretty big.

when my wife wont give up the pussy i wear her underwear on my head and jack to eporner vids

>>654645230
no fucking way, it's both or neither, you can't chose

>>654647010
Really anon?

>>654647293>>654647293
Kek do it

I only like asian girls. My biggest secret.

>>654643396
I'm gay

>>654647395
yep

>>654647234Deryl is dead

>>654643396
I meet hung older men on the regular
>done some pretty depraved shit
>once spent three weeks as a sex slave
>don't even get paid

Now I don't have many big secrets but my senior year I fucked this crazy freshmen. Her body was ridiculous for a 14 year old girl so I thought it was worth. Afterwards I realized I just had sex with a girl my little sisters age, realized the girl had whack self esteem issues and never told anyone or talked to her again.

>>654647073
Even though his opinion/description is completely correct. Autism.

>>654646458
Don't buy into that "well this is me, you're beautiful" web comic shit, tell him straight up or leave him.

>>654647293
KEK, I didn't suck my own dick and I still have a large stretch mark on my back. Got it from puberty, fuck it.

>>654646458
Give em the ol' whippy dong surprise

Tell him to get on the bed, on his back with his head laying off the edge. Tell him to close his eyes. Then, gator slap the shit out of his face while chanting "No homo."

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>>654647440
That'll show her that you're to be taken seriously.

>>654643864
Hot

>>654645329
pics with timestamp faggot

>>654647478
Yeah.

>>654646797
not tiny, just average.

>>654646980
yea i've seen plenty actually.
would have to lure strays and catch them.
couldn't find out if they were male or female until i could get a hold of them and look.

>>654646996
I just wanted to make sure i didn't contract some disease because i had a bit of a rash at some point that didn't go away for a few months.

>>654647053
start with a finger.
stretch it out a bit.
enter slowly.
it's slow going at first, but it works.

>>654643396
I fap to gay pron. no homo though

I thought I was transexual when detoxing off of meth

>>654643396

>Be me 26 yo
>Haven't been working since 2012
>Live alone and mainly play vidya
>Haven't clean up my apartment since I moved in (4 years ago)
>Most of the time I eat cold pizza and old pasta
>When I've eaten enough I put the pizza leftovers back in the oven
>One time I forgot the leftovers in the oven for a week
>I was hungry so I decide to eat it (It was tuna pizza so the smell was fucking awful)
>30 min later I start vomiting all over the place
>My cat lick my vomit WTF?
>Worst.night.of.my.life.png
>Can't shit during the following week
>I look like I'm pregnant
>I'm too ashamed to go see a doctor
>Ask on 4chin for help
>Told that the only solution is to pour some Dr Peper directly in my anus and that this will help dissolve the blocked shit
>Fortunately I always have some Dr Peper in my fridge
>I open the bottle and slowly sit on it until it penetrate my anus
>Then I lean on my back and let the Dr Peper flood my anal cavity
>At first it burns but at the same time it feels great due to the tickling of the small bubbles
>The pain is too intense can't take it anymore
>Run to bathroom
>Shit.Thunder.storm.jpg
>Start bleeding
>Call the ambulance
>Thanks /b/

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no one who matters in my professional life knows this is me

I fake going to work every night and sleep inside of my car in an empty parking lot until my "shift" ends. I then steal money from my mother to pay for my cigarettes and pot.

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>>654647287
Well I have my operation scheduled for January 10th 2016. If I can get him to wait then like by March my vag will be all healed. I have been giving him blow jobs and hand jobs to keep him happy but like he wants sex and I ain't equipped yet plus he is anti lgbt so if he found out I was trans he might kill me but besides that I love him.

>>654647568
Mmmmmm, I would love to do that, getting fucked would be enough payment for me

>>654646859
If you don't give in to the fetish, you're an okay guy in my book.

>>654647805
Is transsexuality a side effect of meth use?

>>654647656
it is sad isn't it?

>>654647397
dated = spent thousands on her

I suck on my own finger thinking its a little boys cock in my mouth during masturbation.

>>654647741
STIs aren't infectious across species. It's why Africans fuck goats. Unless your cat was fucking other dudes, there was no reason to get checked. You're fucking sick, m8.

When I was a sophomore high school, me and three of my friends skipped first period and went to the middle school in the area.

We went on one of the side streets and saw this kid who must have been in 6th grade. He was so small, I remember that much.

We surrounded him, and then without any provocation or words shared, we just started pummeling the poor kid. I remember punching him again an again and when he fell I remember kicking him while he was down. He cried. He screamed. He begged for us to stop through his sobs. But we didn't.

And then we just left. what happened to the kid was the talk of the town so we had to lay low and not talk about it. It was just between us.

He wasn't permanently injured or anything. He went to the hospital but that was only because it was customary.

But I'm sure he remembers my face even today. He'll never forget what we did.

I steal panties from a lot of girls I know.

>>654647741
Im actually wretching

>>654643396
DARYL IS DEAD

>>654647979
yick

>>654647845
wow.
I dont know where to begin on whats wrong with you.

>>654647805
did you take hormones???

>>654644160
no shit genuass

>>654646458
sit him down, suck his dick, then once he finishes pull out your dick and say "my turn"

>>654647984
I just wanted to be sure, as dumb as that sounds.
and yea, it was sick.
but there's not changing the past, so i just kind of block it out and try not to relive it.

>>654647886
Post pics. We need to see what we're working with.

>>654643396
I fap to traps

>>654643396
I just cheated on my gf.

Daryl is dead

op here, im gay

>>654647886
>If I can get him to wait then like by March my vag will be all healed
I you love him, like you say you do, you won't "make him wait". It'll be worse the longer you wait to tell him. If he loves you, he'll be okay with it, if not, then you too weren't meant to be together. Just don't fuck with his emotions by drawing it until your operation.

I inflict pain on myself, not because im sad but because I want to see how far I will go until i pussy out.

One time I took a pair of nail clippers and held it against my skin, slowly pushing down until it went all the way through and took a chunk of my skin tissue out. I now have a scar where I did it.

>>654647556
In what the walking dead?

I might still be in love with my ex girlfriend

>>654647741
I finger my cats ass while she licks my dick, all the time, she enjoys it. I just don't get how a dick would fit. I understand that the anus is stretchable, yes. But for a small animal, it's unfathomable to me.

>>654647971
No, didn't find out she was a stripper until a week after dating her, she just said she worked at a club.

>>654647886
try anal but be sure to hide the pener

>>654645967
>>654646204

moot would be ashamed

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>>654646859
I'm suicidal, multiple attempts and mental hospital stays. See a therapist and shrink but haven't told them about this aspect of me. Sucks balls.

I wear diapers 24/7. I'm not incontinent.

>>654646484
Please greentext chronicles of cat fucking

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>>654647970
It could be worse. You could be so desperate for pussy, that you LITERALLY WENT FOR PUSSY, like some other anon in this thread.>>654647741
This one.

>>654647614
In the webcomic, Martin knew before they were getting into bed that Claire was a transexual. Just sayin'

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>>654647845
How do you...still exist? Did you change your lifestyle?

Cause I don't see that way of living working for very long.

>>654648322
but like i don't know how he would take the news that I am not really a girl, he might kick my ass or kill me, I have given him blow jobs all week so he might feel tricked

>>654646458
if you pass so well he truly has no inkling, well, I'm jelly and those are good problems to have.

but yeah you're kind of screwed here, don't know what to tell you.

>>654648322
Dubs of truth

DAAAAARYYYYYLLLLLL ISSSSS DEEEEEAAAAAAAADDDDD

When I was about 12 me and my dad spent the night at his friends house. His friend was about 50 years old. I woke up to him sucking my dick while my dad was asleep on the couch next to me. I was too scared to do anything ended up cuming in his mouth acted like I was asleep the whole time.

I bragged about going swimming in the sea at night to a kid with almost the same name as me while on holiday.

2 days later, he drowned at night, and everyone at home thought it was me, as our names are almost identical.

it was probably my fault.

>>654646458
Show us pics

>>654648505
But cats have sand paper tongues. Ouch.

>>654646458

>Used to be guy
>still have penis

>>654646859
You aren't a monster for being a certain way that you have no control over, but you can be made a monster by your actions

I jerked off peeking on my sister

>>654648724
What are you trans too?

>>654646458
get op ASAP

>>654648765
yick!

>>654648704
He'll definitely feel tricked if you wait even longer is what I'm trying to say anon. Tell him in public then if you're worried he'll kill you.

I've never seeded my torrents and I never will.

>>654643864
Kill yourself

>>654646364
moon?

>>654644074
Plse die

>>654646541
>>654646859
>>654648550

buy some androgen blockers online. chemical castration isn't exactly "fun", but it's way better than feeling like a ticking time bomb. forgot about having a love life and dedicate yourself to art or making a lot of money.

>>654643396
my biggest secret is ur mum faggot

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>>654644118

>>654643396
can only get off from guys touching me while they think im asleep

>>654648910
no way

>>654648973
well like I pass every other way and i have boobs so yeah I am pretty much a girl now

>>654643396
I dress up like a woman and ever since that happen I wanted to be a woman and became a faggot now, I'm investing into some clothes, shoes, jewelry, make up, hormones, and more now!

>>654648945
They do, yes. But my cat salvates unbelievablely. You wouldn't even notice a sand papery texture.

>>654648322
>he is anti lgbt so if he found out I was trans he might kill me but besides that I love him.

I think this is a more pressing issue than fucking with his emotions..

>>654649360
You must not get off very much.

>>654646458
You're still a guy faggot, you will never be a woman. You will just be a faggot with a mutilated penis.

>>654647886
Pics please <3

>>654649540
i dont

I broke my brother's collarbone a few years ago

>>654648704
You should've been straight (lol) with him, you can't find someone to love you for who you are by trickery and lies.

>>654647545
nice

>have female cousin who takes a highly powerful sleeping pill (psycho depressed bitch)
>literally have pulled her up by the shirt and shook her and she just kept snoring
>get idea to finally take advantage
>next night I act super depressed and convince her to do shots with me..she agrees
>I toss my shots out when she isn't looking
>tell her lets smoke some weed
>Pitch black balcony so she can't really see me
>have a sensitive job so I can't smoke. Just blow into the joint so the cherry lights up and turn my head when I act like I exhale
>bitch is fuxking trashed now
>act like I'm getting tired and it reminds her to take her pill


Long story short. She passed out in my bed and I finger banged her the rest of the night. Would have been win but she had massive meat curtains and pretty sure she didn't shower that day.

>>654649083
yeah obvs

>>654648560

not really something i particularly enjoy reliving because it's pretty pathetic, but there is one story that sticks out

>feeling really horny one day in high school
>took the bus home
>walked to the local shopping center in my town
>wooded area in the back
>lots of cats hang out there
>bring some treats and water and shit
>saw a shaved stray cat
>neverfuckedashavedcat.jpg
>immediately went hard
>this fucker took literally 30 minutes to entice with food
>once she came over to me, she immediately started nuzzling at my junk
>dick was diamonds
>picked her up, turned her around, start rubbing the pussy's pussy
>took out my throbbing boner cock and started trying to get it in
>struggled for a while and started getting scared that people were going to see me
>finally got it in
>got my rocks off in about 30 seconds because i could feel the cat's vaginal muscles contracting around my dick like crazy
>it was satisfying

>>654645568
what are rules 1 and 2

I've been on this website for about 8 years and still don't know how to greentext.

>>654649418
Show us the boobs. I wanna jerk off to your breasts.

Did you get hormone therapy?

That the only girl I will ever love is my ex from 13 years ago and I will be alone for the rest of my life

>>654649418
show a pic without your face faggot

>>654643396
I have a gf for 3 years now and I like to visit whores from time to time, just for the like of it.

>>654646541
control over one's sexual urges is hardest control

>>654649707
And I'd like to add I easily slid 4 fingers in that skank

Sissy/NEET

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>>654643396
my first sexual experience was sucking a dick

>>654648668

I'm on the good path again bro

>>654647845
My fucking sides...LOL

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>>654649729
How big is your dick?

I used to trim my cats claw and eat the clippings like you would biting your nails shit was crunchy as fuck.

>>654646098
That's hilarious.

I lied about running out of money in college, in reality, i was having too much fun with the money the loans gave me and fucking my ex gf. Now im paying for it through loans and no gf who i dated for 6 1/2 years.

Tried the Navy and pussied out at boot camp because i couldnt handle the stress/being away from home.

i fucking hate myself but im trying to fix it all. woo me...

>>654650167
average.
like 6 inches hard.
but not super girthy.
not needle dick, but probably skinner than average.

>>654650069
same tbh

>>654650069
I sucked 3 tranny cocks before I got around to eating some pussy.

>>654645960
I am the same way, but more attracted to women getting railed by dogs.

>>654646458
Give him head instead of sex. Eventually reveal the fact that you have a penis. All the sexy times will make him more likely to have a strong bond with you and not wanna leave.

>>654649782
>Did you get hormone therapy?
duh, since I was 15, now 22

>be 19
>in love with same friend for 5 years
>be 15
>ask her out
>nope.jpg
>be 17
>post pubescent
>actually a 8/10
>I got this shit now
>ask her out
>nope.mp4
>be 18
>enter best friend
>6/10 slightly beta
>starts dating girl you're still in love with
>realize you're a bad human being
>depression
>dropout of college
>life evolves around drinking
>people ask why your sad
>don't answer

when i go out partying with friends and get shitfaced, I stay at my best friend's place or he stays at mine. for some reason, i get super horny and want to fuck him. not in the ass or anything like that. just desperate for some sexy time.

the thing is, i wake up the next morning feeling grossed out. i look at him and wonder how the hell i even managed to want to do what i wanted to do to him the night before.

im straight, not even bi i dont think. ive really tried to figure it out. i get grossed out by the thought of doing it with dudes but on those crazy nights, i just kinda wanna bond with him in a sexy way you know? but that attraction all goes away the moment i actually try to go through with it.

>>654650435
or kick her fucking head in once he realises the truth.

>>654650192
Interesting. What got you into that? Just curiosity?

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>>654649422
I bet you want these faggot

>>654650480
so are you non-op? you could have had bottom surgery like four years ago.

>>654645083
You nuke the commonwealth everytime which also kills your son cause fallout 4 endings are all the same and all bullshit except the institute one is different but still utter bullshit

>>654645671
why?

>>654650341
Go for it anon

>>654650358
Understandable, I'm about average, but more than likely have more girth than you. I guess fucking my car is a lost cause then.

>>654650341
hey man I'm in the navy, shits cake, deployment is dope, you should of stayed in

>>654643864

casual or procreation?

... just curious

>>654650596
you love your friend.

just get brohugs or something, shit should be cool.

or drag a whore back to his and rail her on his couch, sniffing his shirt.

>>654647886
Id def kill you for luring me into a faggot relationship like that.

>>654650069
Fucking same. Hahahaha

>>654647970
kek atleast you've acknowledged it

>>654649045
living the dream

>>654648704
I certainly hope he breaks your spine, you faggot. Blowing a guy whole pretending to be a chick is just as bad as rape.

I don't care what you "identify" with, make no mistake...no matter how much you pretend, no matter how you act, no matter how many surgeries you have, NOTHING will ever change the fact that you're a guy. So keep lying to yourself you fucking freak.

Ugh, what a disgrace you must be to your parents.

>regular minecraft server
>chopping down trees
>leave the top wood blocks
>feel guilty
>quit minecraft

>>654647568
how did you meet them?

>>654650674
I love it

>>654650192
Enjoy your toxoplasmosis u faggit

>>654650905
with the sole intention of passing on genes to the next generation

The only time I ever had amazing mind blowing sex was with a guy who was involved (charged and sentenced) in a murder/chopping up of the body/and burning it. He had just gotten out of prison. Ever since all sex has been boring.
I'm really attracted to killers. Currently the Dnepropetrovsk Maniacs.

Female here, btw.

>>654643396
I fucked the family pet. A cute little chow chow...

We now have a long-term relation ship... I speak her language..

She tells me when she's horny, or about to go into heat...

She's barely too small to take my, but i do my best to pleasure her with my hands and mouth..

I think im in love.

>>654650894
I meant cat... Kek

>>654645610
Deep, but I somewhat relate

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>>654647637

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I'm afraid of sex now. Me. 27 yo. Had 5 women. Only one mattered.long term. 6 years. Ended up with ed cuz of pills. Shit sucks. Also... never... ever... lie about being a virgin

>>654651068
You are what keeps me up at nights crying.
How can you keep living with yourself?

>>654643396
I used to fuck my younger sister... we started fucking at the age of 15... I once fucked her face down while covering her mouth under my parents bed while we where watching a family movie together... I came so many times inside her that I still wonder why she never got pregnant. The hottest and tightest woman I've ever fucked was my sister. We still joke about it.

>>654649729
>feeling really horny one day in high school
Already going down hill

I identify as a girl but will never do anything about it because I owe my girlfriend too much, stopped me killing myself on multiple occasions. It would break her heart.

>>654651225
hey crabman

>>654647886
Had a cousin that did just that. Found out some faggot passing for a girl had been sucking his dick. The faggot is dead now, cousin is in prison for murder. Hope it works out the same for you.

Lost my virginity to a chubby black girl from craigslist. One day I just didn't respond to her texts and that's how I broke it off.

I've gone to a glory hole and got sucked off a few times by some guy who set one up in his apartment.

Sucked a dick for a second under a bathroom stall before someone else came in.

Faked a chronic medical condition throughout middle school and high school that probably cost my parents thousands in visits to doctors and prescriptions

Met my current gf on tinder. We started as fuck buddies but decided to date. Been together for over a year now.

I think my mom is entering the early stages of Alzheimer's and it's the scariest thing I've ever experienced.

>>654650896
i wish i did now after i got dumped. i wont go back now after all the shit thats happening in the world and the possiblity of that facist racist pig Trump being CAC.

>>654645083
about two weeks late but ok

>>654651146
oh my god i have this going on too. This guy at my school got expelled for planning a school shooting.

>>654647845
Literal autism. Did you really think this story was at all funny?

Muney plzzz>>654644118
Just do it@

>>654651371
see how that works out for you when you're a 30 year old hon who wasted her youth on someone who didn't even appreciate it. assist yourself before assisting others.

I sucked a log of shit out of Andy Sixx's ass hole backstage at a concert, and then I used that log of shit as a dildo to fuck my pussy with and then the bacteria from the shit fertilized my egg cells and impregnated me with a retarded human shit baby and then I gave birth to that retarded human shit baby and licked its retarded shit baby ass crack and then I sucked on its rock hard retarded human shit baby fucking balls and fat fucking throbbing retarded shit baby fucking emo goth andy sixx sexy emo deathcore hardcore poser rockband cock until it couldn't take it anymore and then came a giant fucking load of retarded human shit baby cum all over my fucking face, and then I licked all the retarded shit baby cum off and then spit it out in my hands and then used the retarded human shit baby cum as lubricant to finger my ass hole with.
God, andy sixx is so fucking hot.

>>654649441
Yick

>>654651446
I met my wife on tinder and we're actually having a kid pretty soon

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479 KB, 911x683

>>654643396

I've had sex with this gorgeous trap on two different occasions and it was some of the best sex ever.


I've had sex with ~25 women and this was a top 5

pic related

>>654646098
Jakob?

>>654651602
dude... what?

>>654651763
stop posting my pics you jackass.

>>654651598
I've come to terms that I'm a guy, and I'm fine living this gender till the day I die. I just know I won't be 100% happy, and I'm fine with that. The suicide attempts were completely unrelated to this though.

>>654648704
Let him kill you. The world needs less of your kind.