>>653413327

sex : blowjob on plane
fap : classroom during science test

>>653413327
train station bathroom in valencia spain.
got caught by security guards and finned 300 euros.
broke up with her when she refused to pay half of it saying i was the one who wanted to do it there.

>>653413327
Is that dude on dude?

And sauce also

>>653413327
Sex: I'm a virgin
Fapped:
>Be me
>14 yo fag
>Dad was working out of town
>Little brother was with him
>Me alone with my mom
>I was sleeping in her bed
>She was asleep
>I was watching TV while she sleeped
>Saw some softcore porn
>Got horney
>Made sure mom was sleeping
>I fapped next to my mom…

Well… that's my story.

>>653413327
When i was a fatty my gf at the time rode me while i laid flat on ATV. Felt good but hurt my back. Fapped in a van with my mom and grandma

Once fucked a girl on a soccer field

>>653414342
What led you to fap?

I once fapped in school during class

we where 16
she said hook up with the cat or run don the street naked
i did both
got pussy under the street light in the gutter
crazist night of my life..
there is a full story tho

>>653414453
I was 13 and fapped like crazy. Woke from a awesome dream of titties and they were in the 2 front seats. I was way in the back and went for it

>>653413931
No. Can't you see that that's a feminine penis?

Raped in college bathroom at 14. What I get for writing graffiti

>>653413327
Had sex in the middle of a friends backyard lawn on new years eve. Came inside her seconds before the fireworks started... It was memorable.

No real reason. We just thought it would be fun.

used to fap in middle school, would go to the bathroom during class fap at the urinal while no one was there.

>>653414718
I don't know what I see.

>>653413327
sex: in a car at midnight on an almost empty parking lot
fap: in an abandoned industry, after taking pictures of the place

>>653413327
I used to fuck my gf in public toilets, but she refuses now. Shitting men in a meter distance is not very romantic. Especially when you hear when shit drops into the water. And the man makes - "oooooh". Geez...

Fapped in a bus with a lot of people.

>>653413327
i'm pretty sure my high school gf wanted me to fuck her mom.

weirdest fap: in her kitchen while my gf made her mom a sandwich for her mom. she asked me to cum on the bread, which she then spread and fed to her mother.

sex: we once had sex next to her mom while she was passed out on painkillers from a surgery. I was really apprehensive but also in high school. I just needed to see a pair of tits and i as good to go.

>>653414131
Ive done that too

>>653414573
Tell the Story

>>653413327
sauce

>>653413327
banged my gf in a church one time
a greek orthodox church

>>653414858
What about that post-cum drip?

>>653414842
only interesting if you're a girl.
so, lame.

>>653415101
Second this

>>653415138
i was like 12 or 13 i didn't really give a shit, would wash hands and clean up then go back to class, was never caught and no one ever came in

>>653413327
Sex: tie between in the bushes off the trail of a park with folks walking by or literally in the open in from of my GF's house at night

Fap: Bathroom of an all girls school during a swim meet.

Fucked my gf while straddling a bike in the middle of a bridge down some walking trails , she held the brakes so the bike wouldn't move.

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>>653415000
top fucking kek anon

>>653415252
How long was average fap to ejaculation time?

>>653413327
/b/

I had sex with an African muslim girl on a tiny island in ebolaland (Guinea) which was the home of a demon, according to the locals.

I fucked that same girl in the ocean while at a crowded beach and on top of a cliff overlooking the ocean in strong winds. I miss her.

>>653414131
me three lol

Got drunk with a girl in my college class and she gave me a blowjob in the bathroom at a party.

Next day she gives me a blowjob college.

Not fucked her yet tho

fucked my GF in a car wash, the kind surrounded by transparent glass and neon lights.

>>653415570
>blowjob college

>>653413327
skatepark prolly

>>653415401
like 2-5 mins, i would warm up in class sometimes through the pants then have a rager so didn't take long.

>>653415190
I am.

>>653415652
Uncut I'm assuming?

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Fucked this Canadian Officer in Afghanistan.

>>653415519
Oh and also in a casino bathroom.

>>653415025
that's pretty hot tbh.

>>653415783
Moar

>>653415042
>>653415538

Damn! I thought I was the only one!
I simply cannot stop fapping next to >>653414131's mom...

While we're on the subject, I am meeting a girl soon. We'll be walking from the train station to her place where the family will be. I wanna eat that pussy up and have my way with her before we get back. Where's the best place we could go during the day? I am a total newb at this stuff.

>>653415783
POG

>>653415821
Sounds like love anon... What are you waiting for?

fapped- raquetball court to a fitness magazine (14ish)

sex- at six flags

>had sex on the front steps of a church

>fapping.. i guess public bathrooms or under sheets with people sleeping nearby

>>653413327
its nice you include fapping because we all know were sexless virgins

In the backseat of my parents' svu while my dad was driving my girlfriend of the time was giving me head. My dad was such a bro he noticed and gave me a thumbs up. Never said a word about it since

>>653415946
She wanted to get married, I didn't.

last night i fucked a girl at my table in the bar.

>>653416042
No you didn't.

>>653416021
Do you even care anymore?

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>>653416013
wtf fam, that's cool yet fucked at the same time

>>653413327
In a karaoke booth. Some schoolgirls walked by the small window more than once. My girl was pretty sure they knew what was going on. Didn't care... Finished inside.

>>653415131
>banged my gf in a church one time
>a Greek orthodox church
You'd be surprised how much action the back rooms of churches have seen over the years.

>>653413327
Sorcery

>>653416107
What do you mean? We're still in touch and good friends, but I've moved on to other girls.

ive fapped in one of those glory hole places in a sex shop before, because I was to pussy shot to put my dick through the hole.

Dude kept sticking his finger through the hole

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>>653415920
No, I was an American Infantry guy. It was at the end of the deployment. Was at a big base for a month. Fucked her every single day.

>>653416042
you should try it. the key is having tall bar stools

>>653416013
>My dad was such a bro he noticed and gave me a thumbs up. Never said a word about it since
Sure your mom sucks your dad off a lot.

inter nation flight (in the bathroom)

>>653413327
top of a caravan while ex was inside

>>653416210
Well shit, lucky bastard. I spent my entire time in a shitty COP that never saw a woman.

>>653416199
Dubs says green text story

My uncle works at nintendo and while I was there visiting, I raped a girl named zelda.

if you're looking for sauce on OP

http://lukaskies.tumblr.com/post/130389956530/jacemax-now-this-is-why-teachers-dont-let-more

fap At my ex girlfriends house wheile My currenr girrlfriend and i went there for dinner. they are friends. Fap the shit out thinking of her.

sex in my current gfs brothers bed 10 mins after he woke up and left because it was too cold in her room

>>653416385
Pic and timestamp or it didn't happen .

>>653413327
Fucked? Porti potty at Coachella or train that goes around Disneyland. Got a blowjob at church once, too.

Fapped? In the ocean. Lel sorry fishies.

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>>653416332
I was on a 50-man COP till the very end! Noooooo women at all, then get sent by the CSM to help coordinate the unit pulling out, and meet this nympho captain!

>>653413695
oh this made me laugh, especially the last part
nicely done, sir

>>653413327
Sex: right at the base of a cliff where the Pebble Beach golf course (hole 10) overlooks Carmel by the Sea.
Fap: while driving on I-80 in the middle of Pennsylvania near York, PA.

Fucked my gf in my little sisters bathroom

>>653413327
I fapped in brigham youngs house and came on an old pioneer dress

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>>653416602
Her with clothes on.

>>653416666
check'd m8

>>653416666
Nice quads and nice spot to get laid

>>653413327
sex: not much, tents...

fap: back in the days when internet wasnt so common and i explored porn at my mothers workspaces computer, where they let me play shitty net games when i was off school...
also fapped in the same bed with my dad and sister while watching tv, and same bed with my garndma when i was forced to give my bed to my aunt so i had to sleep with granny, but she was asleep for a while... dunno i was into fapping i think...

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Was at friends house when i was 16 or 17 got almost black out drunk on vodka. went upstairs to his sister from at like 3am. she wasn't home. jerked it in her bed using her panties as a cum rag.

pick related

>>653417005
Moar of sister

>>653417005
LOL, very funny photoshopping benedict cumberbatchs head on her body!

>Sex
the times i've fucked it's been at my house or the chicks house not really that weird
>Fapped
inside a dressing room, got horny thinking about fapping in public and found a dressing room where it was an actual room so didn't have to worry about getting caught

>>653417005

This giraff

we was on vacations 2 years ago 12 peiple in friends house in an island.we was out at a bar and came back home with gf 30 min before eveyone to relax at yard.we start fucking there,on the chairs and the yard's table.we literally finish 1 min before they get there.

>>653413695
The police made only you pay?

>>653415131
ela re trele

>>653417274

>peiple
>peipei

>>653416337
Alright anon

>be 21
>sexless virgin, one kiss with a drunk slit
>In the middle of a big unknown city
>Me and friend planning on traveling around the country.
>Friend gets pulled over goes to jail after cop finds drugs.
>Im let go but am now stranded in unknown city until friend gets out of jail
>wonder what to do, go around looking for headshops to buy fake weed.
>after a couple hours see a sex shop
>think what the hell, no one knows me here.
>awkwardly show my id to counter girl
>start looking at stock, see back room
>see guys walking in an out
>get up courage to walk in
>the sex room had a sort of lobby featuring born you can watch
>stand there looking at born selections
>Huge black dude walks up next to me
>oh god, not him, not him.
>stand there waiting for him to move
>awkwardness beginning to boil
>he goes into a room, I go into another far away from it.
>insert a couple dollars into porn machine
>pull down pants, begin fapping.
>hear someone enter next room over
>give self a pep talk
>he swipes finger around the hole like he was hoping for some cum.
>Nope.jpeg cant do this
>but ive come so far, and still a virgin
>keep fapping as I try and figure out what to do.
>Pop my load and embarrassingly gtfo.

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>>653417113

Fucked my gf in a jail cell called the hole at Alcatraz Prison during the tour.

Weirdest fap was maybe 14 working at a body shop sanding a car with an air sander and the hose vibrated a lot and was against my cock till I blew, while I was sanding the paint.

>>653413327
i had a girl start freaking out because i lifted her leg because thats what i learned from porn then she said "i want it to be missionary and i don't want it to be sex" then i started crying and then i started drinking
>haven't had sex in 10 years
>been drinking for 10 years

>>653417728
>Fucked my gf in a jail cell called the hole at Alcatraz Prison during the tour.
You know how many people died in that room??

> I was on work experience when 14/15 with a plumber/joiner.
> Working at an old couples house.
> At lunch took The Sun newspaper to the bathroom
> Wanked over the titties on page 3
> Got the feeling when I returned he knew what I'd been up to.

in one of those toilets that are in the beach
and
a friend told me if i could keep an eye on his pets and fuckd my gf in his mother bed.

>>653413695
That is a beta fail. Any consequence of sex you pay up. I'd have dumped you too asshole.

>>653415131

fuck you bitch

Nowhere odd for sex

Fapped in a model's bed when I stayed at their house for an overseas trip, her bedroom had pictures of her everywhere so it wasn't hard. A couple magazine articles were in there as well but it was in gaelic so I couldn't read them.

>>653416955
>Nice quads and nice spot to get laid
It was awesome. Just broke my first engagement, she just broke up with her boyfriend. She was a tech recruiter and I we were an item from the start. She flew down here from Seattle. Total punk with milk white skin, natural bleach blonde, so fare down there, you could see the vulva through her hair patch. Took her to Carmel. Threw her down on the beach there in the middle of the night. Wave crashing. A few rich old farts walking around. Sure a few saw us and smiled where is reminded them of their youth. Once we were done, hit that one dive bar in a rich neighborhood that all the locals hang in. I fingered her and she blew me as we drove up the one back to Cupertino. Good times.

>>653416115
underrated

>>653413327
When I was 18 and my gf was 17, we had sex everywhere. Fucked her in multiple classrooms and stairwells at school. Fucked her in the middle of my street in broad daylight. Fucked her on a public tennis court. Fucked her in a hotel pool with people swimming feet away from us. Fucked her under sheets while watching a movie with her brother and mom. Fucked her in the back of a car while her friends were driving. She also sucked my dick while my parents were driving. We both got turned on having sex in random places so it worked out nicely. She recently told me, after being broken up for 6 years, that she hasn't had a sexual partner since me that satisfied her as well and was as fun and spontaneous about sex as I was. Made me feel good

>>653417537
Sounds made up

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>>653415783
she kind of reminds me of the woman in this picture. the nose looks similar imo

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> ATVing trough the back roads of Laos
>Come across a cave that the locals only discovered a few months ago
> Grab some head lamps and head into the cave
>This place is cool but dangerous, slippery muddy floor and long drops on either side of the path
>have to squeeze through some areas
>I am a little claustrophobic
>gf knows this
> I say I think I have seen enough
> She comes up to me and starts making out with me and give me those fuck me eyes
>Forget every fear I ever had
>turn her around and pull aside her bikini bottoms
>pull my shorts down
>she is already wet, I can see from my head lamp (good thing too, hands super muddy, so I can't actually touch her pussy with them)
>fuck long and hard doggy style
>have to keep quiet and a look out to see if anyone else is coming into the cave
>pull her hair hard
>she cums
>I cum deep inside
>"anon! you weren't suppose to cum in me"
>woops my bad
>she squats and squeezes the cum out onto the cave floor
>cleans herself out with our water
>kisses me and we head out of the cave
>locals ask if we enjoyed ourselves
>we both laugh and thank them

I think I am going to marry this woman.

>>653418600
Hit that shit again anon

>>653418726
Is this Arizona?

>>653418662
Is this coming from your extensive experience at glory holes?

>>653418782
I would love to but there are 2 things stopping me. One, we both moved away after high school and live like 5 hours away from each other. Two, I'm afraid that being with her again will make me realize how much I miss her and love her and a relationship isn't realistic. She was the best, coolest, sweetest girl I have ever dated. Beautiful and so fucking down to earth and nice. Never bitchy, just awesome. Would marry her if I could

Prison

>>653413327
Fucked my gf while straddling a bike in the middle of a bridge down some walking trails , she held the brakes so the bike wouldn't move.

sex: virgin
fap: fuck, a lot of places. School hallway, public road, above my sleeping brother, trailer park. All while fully nude.

>>653418905
I just grabbed a random image from google. I couldn't take any decent photos in the cave and to be honest it was very unremarkable. Every farmer has found a cave on their land and charges people for entry and some of fucking death traps

>>653419199
if you had bunkbeds and/or didnt make sure your brother was asleep you are a fucking asshole. i have traumitizing memories of a vibrating bunkbed.

I got one from a while back.

>Be me
>Australian Army Heli Pilot
>Land at International base
>Got to mess hall
>10/10 American I-don't-know-what-fucking-type-of-sergeant chick across from me
>Excuse myself
>Go to shitters
>Queue.pdf
>Walk outside to the chopper where buddy is
>Tell him he should go inside
>Compliance.bat
>Move to side of chopper
>Unzip
>BeatIt.mp3
>Fapping while thinking of aforementioned NCO
>Try to think of what type of Sergeant she was (we only have one type sergeant insignia here now)
>Stop thinking of her, and of American Rank structure
>5 mins later still stroking cock
>Friend taps me on shoulder
>Nearly have a heart attack
>"You should see the chicks in there, man!"
>He noticed
>"Oh, you have."
>Walks away
>Don't even finish

We never talked about it ever

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fappen on the top of a mountain when i was 14. feels fucking great to be naked in the wilderness
pic related, it's the view from the mountain

>>653413327
A totaled semi truck parked in a wreck yard.

>>653419525
good

Sex at a church

>>653419449
Oh he was asleep on the floor, I was literally standing over him. He could've woken up at any time.

Fapped - in the toilets at work before I start... I get there heaps early and using watch some anon-v.... every morning! Also I once fapped into my mates mums bottle of brandy.... the thought of her drinking my cut made me too hard!

>>653419625
ha, gaaaay

>>653419559
Also broke into an old abandon Winnebago and fucked in that too. The owner died and it just sat forever.

sex: in the woods, public bathroom
fap: at school, work, public bathrooms
fingered a girl: on a train

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The bathroom of the Nathan's hotdog stand in Time's Square.. No bullshit lol

>girl related

>>653419525
http://www.forti.ch/percorsi-opere/san-jorio/
aahahahaha motherfucker

>>653414718
Kekd
Also I've had sex in multiple public restrooms, on hiking trails, in bushes

>>653419841
hot dog stands have fucking bathrooms now? i can barely find one that has fucking ketchup and mustard now

fucked my gf in the Antoni Tapies gallery in Barcelona, disabled toilets. Another time at her school on the teachers desk

Fapped out the window once kek

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In the elevator. Also blowjob on stairway in public building. Shit was so cash

>>653420037
Yea sorry it's hardly a "stand", really a full restaurant. I just always thought of "nathan's hotdog stand" not restaurant

I fapped once when I was working at McDonald's. I was talking to my customers. I don't work at McDonald's anymore.
I've McFapped!

>>653419848
yep hahahah

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>>653419841
We also fucked over the railing of the upstairs public dance floor of Seacrets in Ocean city MD while we looked down on the packed dance floor below. The upstairs was technically closed so we just snuck up there, we were in plain view maybe ten feet above people dancing lol

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>>653416666
Fuckn

I got detention for whatever, I forgot, but I had to stay in the biology classroom and I was fucking with the cooking pits. The principle walked past, got pissed, put me in the room next to his office with a door leading to it. This room has a giant window to the yard where people had to walk past to enter or leave the school. Furiously rubbed one out.

>>653419963
>Also I've had sex in multiple public restrooms, on hiking trails, in bushes
I seen a lot of action along the Appalican Trail (long before the movie) with three types of hikers: families / couples, Scouts and the hardcore hippie. All three tend to not deal with each other but latch on to another group of their type real quick.

>>653420905
I forgot that he also said fap stories so I was reading that thinking you fucked your principal or something lol

Sex: Teachers lounge with another student
Fap: In the classroom

>Fingered my gf in a bubblepool
>Her parents were in the pool along with her 7 year-old sister
>Held her sister with my right arm
>while fingering gf with my left hand

We also fucked in that same pool after every1 got out. She came I didn't. Who cares.

>>653413327
i fapped in a sofa quietly while 1 meter behind my older brother and his friend playing mortal kombat

>>653414131
seems pretty normal

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>>653420037

This is now a "this-country-has-gone-to-hell" thread

>I only got 4 slices of ham on my Subway sandwich, and it's not even real Black Forest Ham

Sex: football stadium
Fap: no place to weird to fap /b/

>>653417728 #
>Fucked my gf in a jail cell called the hole at Alcatraz Prison during the tour.
You know how many people died in that room??

I know at least 250 million of my sperm died in there too, after she came so hard I pulled out, shoved it in her mouth and fired a huge load down her throat (like a gentleman, so it wasn't dripping out of her for the rest of the tour).

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Sex: in a goat barn/shed while she was milking a goat

Fap: law library, spooged into the shag rug, rubbed it a bit with my shoe and left

>>653413504
I also fapped in scienceclass

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wanked in a pool to a fucking hot brazilian chick sunbathing when i was 15
Kept holding my breath and going under, smashing it a bit then come up to the glorious bubblebutt

Had the thiscrazy Japanese chick I'd literally just met get her tits out for me in a shrine of one of the most famous temples in Japan. Took her home and she sucked me off all night, saying I'd woke up the wolf inside her.

Sex: graveyard
Fap: Leopard main battle tank

>>653423565
graveyard?
please elaborate

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>>653413327

>>653423384
>>653423565

What good does it do you to lie on the internet?

>>653413327

>sex:
>drive in theater
>local forest park
>in a friends hot tub with friends in it
>she sat on my lap, pulled her bottoms aside and put me in her
>no one knew because of the bubbles. She very slowly rocked her hips back and forth, shit was cash.

>fap:
>Work, work bathrooms, that's probably the weirdest for me. I like watching porn when I fap so it was reading dirty mags at work or watching porn at home for me.

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Green: mfw I'm a virgin and see this thread xD

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>be me
>be photograph fag
>fap in darkroom while wait photos to develop

>>653413327
I once fapped at a family gathering. They were all sitting in front of the dining table on the couches watching TV. I was sitting at the dining table in the dark, fapping to the idea of a threesome between me and my twin cousins, who were not that far in front of me

Sex: in the movie theater, with those squeaky old chairs
Fap: while in college, my female friend was sleeping in the bed beside me (visiting) and she was curled in a ball facing away from me, so I covered her ass in cum. Never talked about it but she had to know.

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>>653423838
same, bruh

>>653423752
>>>653423565
>graveyard?
>please elaborate

I brought two of my gfs, on two different occasions, to a graveyard at night and had sex there.

>>653413327
i once jerked off in a restaurant while i was working there this chick with glasses drove me crazy could not help but bust a nut first chance i got i was in the basement so i jerked off and left the rag there behind some cans i was there over being arrested any way to pay off a fine when i was younger

>fap
Tent at festival with the zip open a bit

>Sex
Friends house on their bed and floor

>>653423822

So... What did I lie about.

>>653413327
McDonalds bathroom

>>653419712
Not really - I'm a grill

>>653424643
She was 16

>>653424658
George Foreman?

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>>653413327

In my dreams.

>>653413327
>Be Me
>15 years old
>Camping for a week with nothing to fap too
>Horny teenager
>We stop at a McDonalds on the way home
>Family goes to the washroom, leaving me alone at the table
>No one is in this corner of the restauraunt
>Look up something on my phone quickly that isn't blocked and faps under table
>hot cousin comes out of the washroom as I am about to finish
>sits across from me and asks what I am doing
>"Scratching an itch"
>I cum across the table from my cousin

I'm pretty sure she knew

>>653424658
hot can we get a pic of you or just maybe tits that would be nice <3

also not saying tits or get the fuck out cus you replied to a thread didn't make it

>>653415901
Underrated post.

>>653415025
I guess you could say they were in bread XD

>>653418726
You probably should, she's pregnant.

>>653423384
>Had the thiscrazy Japanese chick I'd literally just met get her tits out for me in a shrine of one of the most famous temples in Japan. Took her home and she sucked me off all night, saying I'd woke up the wolf inside her.
Join the club. A lot of couple meet in temples over there. They even have ceremonies for "finding your mate" where young people gather. Wouldn't be surprised if she was praying for a white guy to fuck the shit out of her and you showed. Happened to me.

>>653424020
>>be me
>>be photograph fag
>>fap in darkroom while wait photos to develop
Dude, same here. One girl I was with got turned on by the smell of the development fluid. Digital cameras are making darkrooms more and more rare.

full intercourse on a ski lift at Mount Mohonk in the catskills

>>653413327
highschool bathroom. multiple times

Fucked a jap girl ontop of some roadie cases in a shipping container while Wilko Johnson was performing 5 feet away from us
was a fun night

>>653425552
who do they pray to?

>>653425723
>
also fucked a girl in orchards.

>>653413327
in a lake on the 4th of July while thousands of people were right on the shore picnicing and playing frizbee and other recreational activities

I sucked my own cock in the back seat of my moms car while waiting for her in a mall parking lot

>>653425723
>highschool bathroom. multiple times
I went to an inner city high school and the men's bathroom had a rep as the toughest place in the school with all the juvies and bullies hanging out. A few years after graduation, I suddenly realized I never use any of the bathrooms my entire four years. I'd dump right before school and dump right home from school.

>>653425911
You win, well done.

>>653413327
inside a 10 bed dorm room in yangon, burma. at lesat 5 or 6 beds were occupied with "sleeping" people.
they must have heard us

>>653425951
i was a horny kid

>>653425893
>who do they pray to?
Shinto / Buddhist prayers is not exactly like western prayer where you project your hope to a god. You typically pray for an event to happen where your postulate or thoughts are much more self reliant as opposed to an entity making it happen.

Then there is ancestor worship where you commune with dead relatives where they guide you. It is similar to praying to a Catholic Saint.

Masturbated in a solarium.

>>653425911
>I sucked my own cock in the back seat of my moms car while waiting for her in a mall parking lot
If I could suck myself off, I'd have a very pleasureful starving death as I'd never leave home.

~2500 years old Nabatean Tomb @ Petra. Gf was also Petra. double win.

>sex
In a cemetery at night on top of the main tomb roof. The cemetery was built with a crazy architecture. And the main tomb belongs to the architect and his wife. We made it on top of it.
Also in my room while my roommate was watching a movie on his laptop with headphones on

>>653415665
So share the story

>>653424658
slapping your clittitydiddily over a member of the opposite sex does not excuse you from being a gay incestual brother diddler, m'am.

>>653426207
I dedicated my time to that skill, took me almost a year before I could get more than the head in my mouth, but eventually I could throat not just the head but about 3 inches of shaft, good times my friend , good times

Got my dick sucked on top of mount Fuji while the sun was coming up.
pretty good morning that was

>>653424839
how old was she?

In school

Driving and got flashed by a speedcamera in Norway while getting a blowjob from my exgirlfriend. Wonder where that picture ended up.

>>653426306
>~2500 years old Nabatean Tomb @ Petra. Gf was also Petra. double win.
What is the sentence for that if you were caught?

>>653427374
either the internet or your mailbox, post

>>653426821
>Got my dick sucked on top of mount Fuji while the sun was coming up.
>pretty good morning that was
Damn good one!

Back seat of girlfriends car while her mom was driving

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>Be 19
>work in a pub/restaurant with a kids play area
>ratio of male to female staff
>Kitchen - 4/1 Bar - 1/2 serving 2/3 kids area 1/3
>Be on shift have a party of 22 kids due in
>1 guy from play area off sickplay area girls come asking to borrow kitchen staff to dress up as the mascot.
>draw short straw so it had to be me
>go get dressed and follow out to play area
>spend about 20 minutes pretending to be surprised and sing etc, mascot can't speak
>be some kind of reverse pedophile 22 kids flocking around me
>typical mascot stuff, getting poked prodded and kicked
>one kid punches me right in the dick
>one of the party's parent noticed play area girl noticed
>she distracts kids with games etc
>head into little side room used for storage to catch my breath
>girl from party comes over slips her hand into the waistband on mascot outfit
>gropes me, can barely see shit out of mascot head but she begins jerking me
>feel the build up followed by a rather hard orgasm
>she walks off, I leave corner balls hurting like hell
>see woman dip her finger in the cake icing before sucking the cream and cum off before wiping her hand over what I can only assume was her husbands back
>5 minutes on my groin feels like it's on fire go see manager still wearing mascot outfit, take head off
>tell him about pain, he sends me home
>2 hours later my sister has to take me to A+E
>find out the kids punch gave me a hernia

TL:DR Dressed up as resturant ma+ascot, got hit in the balls, got jerked off couldn't really enjoy it due to pain went to A+E found out had hernia.

>judges bench at criminal courthouse, Young and Collage during court lunch break (19)
>My buddies girlfriend on a Snowbank outside a church during sermons
>All girls group home for troubled youth (was only guy there, worker put on file I was gay, I was not)
>Meat freezer at The West Detention Center in Toronto.
>Burger King Freezer
>Various ally's behind / beside bars
>Dance floor at a club Got my cock ridden grind style by some hot chick on the dance floor, no one noticed, never even got her name.
>Scarborough City morgue, A GF was an assistant there.
>CN tower observation deck
>Kids Ball bin thing at CNE
>E party in back of empty truck trailer at CNE (turned into an orgy)
>City TV's speakers corner (we paid the $1 to record it)
>In a shit covered horse stable

>>653427559
Was driving my father's car at the time and never heard of it since. Hope he had a good laugh.

Story of how i got the nick name, backseat boy. related to OP

>long car trip to city
>start sexting gf
>get super horny
>everyone in car but dad whose driving is asleep
>gf sends pics
>fuck it I'm horny.jpeg
>whip out cock
>cover with jumper
>begin fapping fast to get it over with
>brother next to me wakes up
>see's me hunched over with what was obviously me with my dick in hand
>oh shit.gxe
>try n play it cool
>he knows whats up
>promises not to tell school mates
>next day whole school knows
>fml
>get called backseat boy for rest of school
>gf thinks its funny and sticks around for a while until we break up.

hands down the worst day of my life /b/.

>>653415647
Yeah, it's the best here at BJC. I tried getting into Anal University, but it's pretty hard to get it there.

>>653413327
I had sex in a drain pipe in construction. You know, those 1.2/1.3m diameter cement tubes.
Me and my ex shagged there a couple of times. There was a construction at the moment, so the sewers weren't connected yet. It was less cold than out in the forest they were constructing in, so yeah things were fun.
The bitch was kinky, one we got back from the towns' festivity at ~4:50/5am on a thursday and I just unzipped her pants, put her against my neighbours fence and we shagged in the street. Shit was cash.
>ib4 designated shag

>>653413327
Server Room at a college

>>653413695
>train station bathroom in valencia
Fuck off emokid

I once fapped when I was 13 in my dads car in the supermarket parking lot waiting for him to get the newspaper.

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>>653428331

Post>>653414718
Good job, kek'd so hard you broke me niggah

middle of the desert.

>driving through desert in Arizona.
>pull over into a rest area. Area super remote. >start banging fat GF on backseat of car (she is dirty bitch and loves fucking)
> Doors wide open, sun blazing down and me doing best Brazzers impersonation.
>She starts screaming.
> WTF?
>Look up.
>See old dude about 70 standing outside car masturbating.
>FUUUUUCK!!
>Jump in front seat and peel out with fatty GF bouncing about in back screaming WE COULDA BEEN KILLED.

Only thing I can really remember is that he was wearing a pair of mismatch Chuck Taylor high tops and a green bathrobe with no pants.

Who wears no pants in the desert?

>>653414573
Yeah, do it faggot, tell us

>>653413327
Sex hidden back of a bale of hay
Fap had Hand job in a traffic jam

>>653427779
rofl you literally got raped

ex was a pedo
>we're babysitting her little sister (we were around 16 and her sis was 4)
>She undressed her sis getting "ready for bath"
>While her sis protested she was running around buttnaked
>I was cozied up in the livingroom sofa
>ex told her sis to do bunch of dances from some kid's tv show
>Told me to not blink my eye and keep looking at her
>She proceeded to blow me while "forcing" me to watch her buttnaked sis

Not sure how I felt about it, she's in a asylum or institute what'cha might call it

Weirdest place to fap was...once again at ex's house
>Home alone with her mum
>Woke up and heard her mum showering
>bathroom door had a full view of bath/shower
>peeking through keyhole and fapped
She did bunch of weird positions to clean herself, I especially liked her butt facing me spread while she was reaching down

...i'm normal stfu

Sex: Being a tree about 2 metres off a public and busy path, didn't get caught lol

>>653429211
silly anon i'm male I can't be raped

Sex:virgin
Fap:
>be me
>be 14
>have a friend overnight
>stay up late
>he falls asleep
>itstime.jpg
>get my laptop out
>low brightness and no sound
>let the fapping commence
>blow my load all over my chest
>he is laying there next to me
>see something
>instantly regret it
>fucking cum on his face
>I clean up and leave it there
To this day I don't know if he knew what happened

no sex ever
used air jet in public pool to get off

never fucked anywhere strange but I stealth fapped in a walmart parking lot once while my 6 year old sister was sitting in the back

The Ocean.

>>653413327
That's dude sex. Fags.

Fapped: my moms church's bathroom... im not to proud

>>653417985
Exactly. What better place to fuck, the very act of creating life, than in a place tainted by death?

>>653429288
i came

>>653414131
Me five
> she woke up and asked what I was doing

>>653414421

Haha same. Also fucked same girl (was gf at the time) in the grounds of a church.

Also fucked different ex-gf in a primary school down the road from a nightclub at about 1130 at night.

>>653414131
Did it.

in my dads car in the parkinglot outside a store when my whole family was inside shoping food
>they come back
>i tried to open all doors after cumming and air the car
>little bro :"whats that smell"
i was around 13 or 14
sex: on a table... i've literally never had sex any place outside my home

Baseball diamond

>>653429288
Feel ya. My ex was also a pedo. Nothing that extreme though, but when we'd sext she'd always involve a Lil girl

Had sex with my now-ex gf in a kindergarden bathroom. was awesome

I fapped on my motorcycle, at 70mph, put a throttle lock on feet up on foot rests, lean against the back rest and fapped while driving across Pennsylvania turnpike, had a sweater I would pull over cock when car or truck came by

>>653429992
>air the car

Fucked my ex in a changing stall at a water park.I also fucked her on the balcony of our hotel room in Spain.

>>653413327
sex: music room in the university dorm common area
fap: armory tower at the swiss national museum

This one happened 2 weeks ago

>chick friend from work who has the hots for me invites me to party
>dont know anyone there, friend gets drunk and lays down on a bed in her friends house
>I lay down next to her and we chat about random shit, ask why havent we banged yet etc
>her friends 13 year old sister comes in and lays next to us
>my work friend says "did you know he has abs" and sister doesnt believe her
>I say "you can feel them if you want" and instantly feel like a pedo and i will now be destroyed
>the sister touches and is in shock, i am now known as "abs guy"
>mfw i just had eaten fuck all and was flexing, i dont really have abs
>friend whispers very audibly to the 13 year old "have you ever seen a dick"
>sister says no defensively
>work friend says "do you want to" and puts her hand on my groin
>the 13 year old says "put it away!" and covers her eyes. its not out yet
>oh whoops now it is
>work friend laughs and starts jerking my flaccid cock, takes 20 seconds to get hard, my dick is about 20cm hard
>13 year old immediately removes hands from face, stares in awe
>work friend: "want to touch it?"
>i say "i dont think she should anon thats fucked"
>she laughs and says random things to 13 year old, they have semi normal convo but im still being jerked
>i look at 13 year old, she just stares at my cock
>I feel like im going to cum and horniness takes me over and i whisper to my friend to go faster
>she does and i cum really hard all over myself
>13 year old stares and is clearly turned on
>i go "fuck" and wipe it off on my hands
>literally 30 seconds later the mum comes in and says "who's this. come on, no boys in here" shes a bit drunk too since its her other daughters party
>13 year old follows me around all night
>i say im going to leave numerous times but she gets angry when i say im going
>i end up sneaking out at 4am

I feel fucked up

>>653416199
lmao "gimme that dick"

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>>653415901

At a physio therapist...
What can i say? I was young and the magazine was there!

lessee. Interesting places I've fucked in.

Friend's house with him passed out only a couple meters away(two girls to myself, lucky me), church bathroom, park bench, park against a wall on a bike path, in the middle of the woods at a crosspath, on the hood of a car in a public open air parking lot at a park, in a former girlfriend's backyard, back of a bar...i think that covers most of it.

>>653413327
some crazy places but not in a dudes asshole
>kudos

>>653415821
was her name ellie

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>>653430957

In an Ambulance, former EMT so probably not so weird as I spent 12 - 16hrs in one every shift.

>>653413504
>sex : blowjob on plane
So a blowjob is now sex? Get a load of this kid.

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>>653430445

Has this happened before anon?