Self depreciating sarcasm and dick pics

knife to chest or gun to head both are very effective

>>649890681
Be homosexual and make a Grindr account.

>>649890681

Er, it's pretty easy bro.

>Get "liked" on OKC
>Send message. "Hi, how are you doing? What're you up to?"
>Message a little, be flirty.
>"How about we meet up for drinks?"
>Have drinks.
>Don't act like a faggot.
>"Let's get out of here and hang at my place."
>Get to my place.
>Make move.
>Start kissing.
>Fuck.
>Done.

Thai girl, met her for coffee, shit checked out. Tell her to call me when she wants to hang out, she had a bad day wants to hit a bar, she proceeds to get drunk, too drunk to drive anon is fine, she asks me to take her car to my place and she can get an Uber from there. I'm like roommate isn't home (wife) you can crash if you want that way you don't have to deal with your car, gets inside and I jump in bed, you're welcome to take the couch or I can.. And she's got that no way look on her face... And I'm like ooor you can share the bed with me, but forewarning I sleep in the nude, so she took her cloths off and it was in after that. She ended up coming by on long breaks to get a nut and bounce for months after before she went home ....


To her husband.

>had sex
>both drunk
>dick went soft 5 mins in
>she was dry as a bucket off sand
>I fell in love with her because i'm emotionally fucked up
>she stopped talking to me
>no real ending other than she doesn't respond to any messages I send her

>>649891154
I'd highfive you so hard dude

>>649891492

This. Most girls are on there to get laid as well. Even though they like to deny it to not seem like sluts.
If they agree to meet up, you're in, as long as you don't behave like a retard.
Just act chill, get to her or your place, and initiate.

>>649891676
If both looking to get laid, and call one a slut, would that not make both a slut?

Oi nigs wtf is this new "super like" shit? Started tinder again yesterday and last night a hot girl came up and said she gave me a "super like", wtf does that mean?

>>649891925

Exactly, the only girls you shouldn't go after are the obvious 10/10's, that would have 0 problem getting a date. They're either fake or just looking for compliments and attention, they'll never agree to meet.

Any other girl is just as thirsty for sex as you are, and as long as you act normal you're good to go.

I was on tindr for a month or so, just deleted my shit.

half those girls are too timid for an actual date, and I honestly got more responses from being drunk and basically saying 'ey baby u want sum fuk'

>get a girl who plays guitar too for a date
>firs thing she says is "i'm a bit fucked up"
>walked to her car to snort adderall during the date
>asked her about her luck on tindr
>fucked like 7 guys on here
>decided to leave date early to get whiskey from a guy who will 'probably want to fuck her'

I got over it. I'll start again after the new year. Just gonna focus on myself for a little while.

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589 KB, 720x960

>>649891154
This is the girl, she wanted big dick on demand. Would sneak out and fuck in the car before she went to see her man. Came over one time and I was tired, so I'm like come take a nap with me that's not so bad, during the nap I was like fucking, pulled her panties down and busted on in her pussy.. she got up and was like fuck, you suck asshole I'm late for work! later she explained that she was pissed because she didn't have time to clean and had to send her entire shift walking around with my cum dripping out of her... was a big ass load.

In my experience almost all girls on tinder are timewasters that are happy to entertain themselves and rely on your matches for their validation, and it ends there. Not saying that out of bitterness, just saying the odds are really small that any given girl you match with on Tinder actually wants to meet up and fuck

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Went on tinder, met up with a girl. Dating for 5 months now.

Pic related.

I'm not ugly, most of my female friends rate me at an 8, which I guess is good?
I'm social as fuck in the flesh but I think I'm a little lack luster online.
That said, I have had zero luck on both Tinder and OKC.
I only get spam bots or bitches that don't reply.
Dunno what I'm doing wrong except NOT starting the conversation as "I bet you got some nice pubes."

>>649891026
this is the precisely and expected behavior from both parties in larger cities. busy busy busy... and they're just looking to smash and dash.

>>649892468
ya dude same

>>649892710
Protip: You're actually a 5-6 tbh fam. Females lie 99% of the time. It's not their fault. They're programmed that way.

>>649891154
Almost got it in her pooper that day but after about three inches she was freaking like Flash Gordon off that dick sat and took and attempted to take a shit as she felt like she was on the verge of shitting... Stayed in the bathroom for a while came back out and we continued where we left off sans anal. After wards we're laying together and she asked for a strong muscle tranquilizer, I give it to her, proceed to fuck her all night while she's out of it and I was just bitching about not getting a nut , she she said it's okay to get my but while she doesn't have to do any work and it would actually be better for her. C

So I get a double nuts In her pussy and then go a little bolder and push it into her ass, not much but to come super easy into her asshole with the tip in so as not to fuck her up.

After I did this my balls were drained I layer down next to her for about an hour and ready my hand over her to her butt, she's got a nice ass, and i start feeling it..

Like whys my hand wet, must have started her period, but when I raise the sheets it's dripping diahrea all down her back and ass cheek to the bed and in like going postal, rip off be bed and the cloths in her groggy state and send her to the bathroom to take a shower while I out the aheets insaniters. She was so out of it don't think she fully comprehended. At the moment

>>649891026
BS not this easy.

>>649892629
You're doing it wrong.

>>649893568
TL;DR, picked up a Thai grill from March, secretly banged until I tried to get a nut in has ass, but she still comes around because she loves that dick and her husband is a redneck took.

>>649894055

Sorry. If you're an ugly cave troll it isn't.
In any other case, yes it is.

>>649894609
I'm a solid 6 but my personality is a solid 3. No cave troll about it.

Got a bj by a chick who was out of me league on tinder. She later blocked me.

Got laid lots of times on pof.

>>649892629
Nudes

>>649894780

Then improve your personality. Or at least hide it by acting normal for an hour.

Dont have tinder but i got snapchat if you guys want nudes

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